Suit of the Week: Ann Taylor

155 Comments

1. I love colorful suits and I’m 32, so there’s one data point. Would love to have a reason to wear them again.

   1. I’m also into it. Did anybody else watch I Care A Lot and feel like they needed a yellow pantsuit after? Just me?

      1. yes! and the beige trench!

      2. Absolutely! I just don’t look good in yellow. I have cool undertones.

   2. I love colorful suits but I wasn’t sure if they were work appropriate or not! 26 year old

   3. This is such a beautiful color, too.

   4. I had a beautiful suit in this exact color of teal when I interviewed for my college internship in the late 90s. Wore it probably much longer than it was fashionable, but I loved it so much. Wish I could still fit into it!

2. PSA for the poster a few weeks ago (or anyone else) looking for kids books by Asian and Asian-American authors, there is a post on Cup of Jo from a couple days ago on the topic with recommendations.

3. I wouldn’t do coral or lavender but this teal specifically is deep enough that I would definitely wear it with an ivory blouse and black heels. – 33yo for another data point

4. I love this! Just bought it. Beautiful color on me perfect for a zoom interview

5. I am wearing this suit, maybe in a slightly deeper green from the fall, so I am obviously team colorful suits. I also have coral jackets and get a lot of compliments on them, but I would have a hard time going with a full coral suit myself. I’m 47, so I’m not “young.”

   1. About your vintage and I had a darker green long skirt suit back in the day for interviews. It was double-breasted, with a shorter jacket. I feel like my kids would wear that if I still had it. The color (at least) was beautiful.

   2. How do the pants fit? I am thick in the thigh?
      Do they wash well ?

      1. I am wearing the side zip ankle pant in my regular size and they fit without a lot of room. The straight pants might be a bit more forgiving. Both suit pieces washed well. I used a delicate wash liquid detergent, washed on delicate, briefly tumbled, then air dried and briefly steamed the jacket. There was no noticeable color loss.

6. Yesterday my aunt passed away from COVID-19. She is the third family member I have lost to the pandemic recently. I have three more who have it and two of them are in the hospital. My cousin had a Valentine’s Day wedding. Our city is a hotspot and the wedding violated the rules on gatherings and no precautions were taken (no one had been vaccinated, no social distancing or masks etc). At least 20 people got sick from the wedding. I don’t understand why my cousin didn’t wait until everyone was vaccinated and things were safer. She could have gotten married this summer outdoors with precautions taken and things would have been safer. I’m so angry and hurt right now.

   1. I’m so sorry

   2. I’m so sorry for your loss. This must feel horrible and preventable.

   3. I’m so sorry for your loss. You have every right to be angry and hurt. I am sure people will try to tell you to be the bigger person here but you have permission from this anonymous Internet stranger to feel all the rage that you need to to help process this. It’s OK to be angry at selfish actions and denying that anger makes grief harder in my experience.

      1. OTOH, those 20 people chose to go to the wedding. So did everyone else. For the Nth time, an invitation is not a summons. Why are people treating it as such, especially now? [I know, because we are just human and love our families; all the more reason not to be short-signed about it. You can’t see your family if you or they are dead.]

         1. It’s true, but it sounds like the family pressured everyone to go and not everyone is strong enough to overcome that. If the bride and groom had not held the wedding, people would have lived. That’s how I see it.

            1. Same. People need to exhibit some leadership, especially when it’s their event.

   4. So sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine the pain.

   5. I’m so, so sorry. That is awful and I do not blame you at all for being angry and hurt. That wedding was completely wrong and selfish and clearly devastating. Hugs to you getting through this time.

   6. I’m so so sorry. That’s all very awful.

   7. Your cousin is not ignorant of what happened. This is on her and she has to live with it for the rest of her life.

      I’m sorry for your loss.

   8. I’m so sorry. You have a right to be angry and feel all the feelings

   9. i’d be angry too. your cousin is a horribly selfish person. she now gets to live with the guilt of being responsible for her mother’s death. granted, everyone who attended also made the choice to attend. i mean i never would’ve gotten married like that in the middle of a pandemic, and i’m honestly not sure if i could forgive the selfishness of someone who did. chances are more than 20 people are sick from it because each of those people probably infected others

   10. Wow, I’m still speechless when I hear of these types of gatherings, when I haven’t seen anyone in 12 months other than my doctor. I am so sorry that you’ve lost so much.

   11. I’m so incredibly sorry. I can’t imagine how hurt you must feel.

       If I were the bride or groom, I think I would potentially need to be admitted to a psychiatric facility to avoid harming myself over this. I literally cannot imagine living with this guilt and shame for the rest of my life.

       1. Someone in as much denial as these two were in deciding to have their wedding when they did are probably continuing to be in denial that their wedding caused all this. But they’ll know it inside, or at least have doubts about their innocence.

          1. Exactly this. My former college roommate (we’re in our 40s now) held a Galentine’s Day party with about 20 people at her house similar this year (indoors, no masks because “we all know each other and we’re all being safe”). When I told her I wouldn’t attend and that I thought she was nuts, wouldn’t she feel guilty, etc., etc. I got a “it’s everyone’s decision whether to attend or not” back in response. Some people are just going to focus on what they want to do and take no accountability.

             1. Can you just decline without telling people they are nuts?

                I feel like this is telling someone just not to drink / do drugs / binge / purge. We know we shouldn’t do those things. It doesn’t make us nuts to want to do those things or to in fact have done them. Especially under stress. Especially when our other support networks are frayed or have vanished. Sometimes I make decisions that are bad. But I will own having made them freely.

                I also get people wanting to have an event for those comfortable with it, figuring out that those who shouldn’t or don’t want to will just not go (not: will be pressured into doing it anyway).

             2. Anon @ 4:40 that is the most twisted logic I’ve seen to defend events like this. And it’s not like binging/purging/drinking/drugs where you (mostly) only harm yourself. The very issue with the pandemic is that you harm many, many others, directly and through several degrees of indirectly.

             3. Omg it’s not like drugs. Knock yourself out with drugs, idgaf. But you don’t get to do whatever the hell you want when your actions harm me and my family in a pandemic.

             4. Responsibility runs both ways. Someone can invite me to something (so I don’t feel excluded, esp. if something is a wedding; I think funerals are quasi-public and you don’t really need to be formally invited), but I don’t have to go, even if I feel pressure or a real emotional tug. And I don’t have to associate with people who just came from a big event (and yes, if you are wanting to avoid these things, you do need to play 20 questions with people). I know good people getting married this year who “invited” people b/c Great-Gran wants to get an invitation for her granddaughter’s wedding to put in the scrapbook she does for all grandchildren’s weddings, but won’t go and the 100 invitations are truly expected to yield an audience of 50 (allowable in our state), and I think that is fine. People are going to have to be deciding these things at least through the end of the year, if not longer.

                And if someone says no, no is a final answer. And it is a complete answer. And it should be respected with no pushback.

                I shake my head, but I feel like everyone needs a refresher on this.

   12. I’m the OP. Thank you everyone. I needed the kindness today.

       My aunt who passed away is also an aunt to my cousin. My cousin’s mother is currently in the hospital. So is her new husband (though thankfully both are awake and not needing a ventilator). Her father has it to but he is at home. I also just found out that one of the bridesmaids was admitted to the hospital today. My cousin had been diagnosed shortly after the wedding.

       My parents and I didn’t go. This is my dad’s side of the family (my mom has no living relatives). We were told the family was “annoyed” with us for not going when we live in the same city and there was lots of pressure and grumbling. We did send gifts and offered to host a party for them when things had gotten better but we didn’t feel comfortable. Besides going to the doctor and the grocery store if delivery isn’t available my parents and I have stayed home the past year. We did Christmas and other holidays over face time. My dad has lost his mother, his sister and his uncle and it was all so senseless. I’m angry at my cousin for going ahead with it the wedding and all my relatives who went. They are all adults who knew better. The 20 people I mentioned were wedding guests, there were definitely more made sick from spreading by the guests in the community. My cousin even complained when the venue got fined for hosting a wedding that broke the rules and if she hadn’t gotten sick soon after her and her husband were planning to travel to another city for a honeymoon. My parents and I are distancing ourselves from the family for now.

       1. Ugh, that is just too awful for words. I’m so sorry. I do want to say that you made 100% the right call by not attending the wedding yourself. It’s very, VERY hard to maintain those boundaries, especially for events like weddings, and I’m so glad you held your ground. I really hope everyone who is sick recovers and that your cousin learns a hard lesson about humility. I also think you are 10000% justified in distancing yourselves from them forever if that’s what it takes for you to heal. I’m so sorry again.

       2. It is OK to distance yourself from the bride and groom and as many of their supporters in the family as you need while you work through your feelings. Seriously, take all the time you need. I give you permission not to feel any guilt for keeping these people out of your life while you grieve all the deaths that could have been prevented, and the illness which could have been avoided.
          I am so so sorry for the loss of your many loved one. Hugs to you. Be gentle with yourself.

       3. Wow. Distance yourself for as long as you want or need, including forever.

          1. Exactly this.

          2. One vote for “forever”

             I imagine there will also be many well-attended funerals now for you to skip. Please do.

       4. I am so sorry for your losses. The selfishness of your cousin is almost unbelievable. In your shoes, I don’t think I’d be able to continue a relationship with her.

       5. This is horrific, and infuriating, and sad. I’m sorry your family is dealing with this. And distancing yourself from that side of the family for as long as you need, even forever, is a very valid response.

       6. Your cousin is a POS and I would be sending her a bereavement card on her wedding anniversary every year.

          1. +1 with a list of the names of everyone she killed inside the card

          2. Honestly I’d be REALLY tempted to do this too. I might revise that if the cousin expresses any remorse.

   13. Oh my! So sorry for your losses. Hot fury is an appropriate response to this.

7. This reminds me of suits I wore back in the 90s. So a no from me for a full on suit; as a jackets or blazer – maybe so long as your bottom half is neutral. Pastel suits read too going to church on Easter Sunday.

8. I have twins in middle school. We were hoping to put off buying them computers until they go to high school because it just an expensive investment and computers get outdated so quickly that I’d like them to have them have more current and well-working machines when they need to use them. (Same reasoning we are holding on to our 17-year old car – we will trade that in for a newer model when the twins drive). That said, they would both like to enroll in a 4-week online python class this summer through the local college and a working PC and camera are required. The only computers we have at home are DH and my work computers, which we will be using during the day. (they use school-issued ipads for zoom school, but we need actual computers for the coding class). Has anyone tried renting computers before? Or would it be better to just buy them older computers? The other problem is that DH and I are not computer people, so we have no idea what’s a good deal for an older computer and cannot fix anything that may have an issue, so we are hesitant about buying a used computer from craiglist. Looking for any suggestions here.

   1. I would buy a new, cheap laptop, not an older computer.

      1. https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/best-laptop-under-500/

      2. +1 – computers don’t need to be that expensive anymore. There are decent chromebooks out there for $500 (or less clearly check your tech specifications for the class before you buy)

      3. Definitely a new, inexpensive computer over used or old. A new cheap computer is likely better able to handle current software than an older high end one.

         If the class is online, does a chromebook work?.

   2. Check with their school to see if there is any way to borrow their laptops for 4 weeks during the summer. We needed to reimage computers during the summer; however, we could have worked around a 4-week class.

   3. You can get a decent computer for under $400. Just buy them.

   4. Does it have to be a PC? I’ve had my Macbook Pro for 10 years and am just now thinking about replacing it. It was my daily work computer for 5 of those years.

   5. I feel like this is what those sub 300 acer and the like aptops were made for. When I was very broke and doing online classes, I bought two or three over a few year period by watching sales (cause man do they not live long but I could come up with 300 at the time not over 1000). I feel like PCMag does pretty good roundups of inexpensive laptops regularly.

   6. Would a Google Chromebook work?

   7. In the same boat, but I need the kids to be able to use Excel on a computer. Can you get MS office installed on a chromebook (I hate the in-the-cloud thing) or other cheap computer (what is the most basic PC you can get these days with a camera on it)? I guess we are in laptop land b/c the kids don’t like devoting so much of their desk to a desktop and like to move around the house with them (or bring the computer for me to see when they have an issue, which WFH me appreciates vs just yelling “mom”).

   8. Laptops don’t go obsolete in 5 years – I would reconsider the approach of buying a temporary one unless you don’t trust your kids to take care of them. We get 7-10 out of our “home laptops” – light gaming, email, photos, web stuff.

      1. I’m typing this on a 9 year old MacBook Air that works perfectly (knock on wood). Get them reasonable laptops (not top of the line, but not refurbished either) and expect to replace them for college. If their interest in coding lasts past the 4 week online class, they will need them anyway.

         1. Agree with the sentiment, but OP do not get them anything from Apple if they’re programming.

            1. Why not? I’m a dev and I develop on a mac. I mean they’re expensive so perhaps it wouldn’t make sense for the Op’s situation but there’s no reason why you can’t use one for programming. At work we pick our systems and many people pick macs.

            2. My son started his programming journey on my Mac book pro and they’re “supposed” to be compatible but he kept running into issues where they weren’t exactly compatible. We got him a not very expensive Lenovo and all the problems disappeared. This was for high school programming. He’s a CS major in college now.

            3. Lol it depends on whether students are doing “gentle intro” type programming where working from windows is usually standard or “high performance” type stuff where access to linux from mac is a feature not a bug.

               That being said, for middle schoolers? I would not pay the mac tax.

            4. He was doing Java and Python, like OP’s kids, at the time.

            5. I mean who knows what gave him trouble but it wasn’t because programming isn’t compatible with a mac. :)

            6. I code a little and my macbook pro is my preference. Curious what type of coding it would be bad for.

   9. I have also found my best cheap laptops via Walmart online.

   10. If you can afford it (and it sounds like you can, you just want to spend wisely?), I’d definitely go with new laptops. Computers don’t go out of date that quickly anymore , so you should be able to buy something that gets them through high school, as long as they don’t physically damage them. I have a five year old $1100 Dell that still runs like new, though I did add more RAM shortly after buying it (this makes a huge difference).

   11. Gently, it is time that they had computers. You can get them a laptop with not much storage and an average amount of power for $500-1000 each. There is no need to wait, as these are standard devices for life. I understand, as we have a car that is 14 years old, and we keep our laptops for a long time. But, a computer is not a luxury item for a middle school or high school student–it is a necessity. Buy one without enough power for gaming, if that is your worry, and have blockers put on for p0rn and s3x. Your local best buy can be a big help. This is a good time, as then you can get them new ones for college and they can look forward to that.

   12. I would go with certified refurbished from the manufacturer.

       1. Bingo. I still buy refurbished.

   13. Middle school is time for a computer. Their assignments will increasingly live in the cloud (google docs mainly) so they need something better than an iPad. Buy them laptops.

   14. Your kids need their own laptops. Gently, you may not be “computer people” but their entire generation is, and many classrooms function through online portals and/or require coursework done on a computer, especially once they get into middle school. It’s more or less in the category of “school supplies” nowadays. You don’t have a personal laptop so may not understand what they cost, but you can get good quality laptops that last through HS (and if not all the way through HS, most of HS and they can use the replacement through college) for a few hundred dollars.

       If you’re worried about monitoring their online usage or gaming, you can put parental controls that limit what websites they go to and avoid buying a gaming computer.

   15. Absolutely any computer you buy will be fine and will get them through high school at least. I’m most of the way through a 2nd degree in Computer Science (so big, gross coding assignments) and my 6+ year old laptop that was a solidly middle-of-the-road machine when I bought it, is more than up to the task. Even a cheap, entry-level computer will get them through high school.

   16. Tech employee here, but really my advice comes from being married to a software engineer. I know everyone’s suggesting laptops, but why not desktops? Cheaper and much easier for an amateur to upgrade over time (e.g. swap out memory for a solid state drive, replace a fan). I imagine they’ll eventually want laptops for college, but desktops are far more flexible and economical for high school.

       1. Good point. I wrote about my CS major son above. He wouldn’t be caught dead using his laptop for anything other than toting to class to take notes. Desktop all the way (and he has built and keeps rebuilding his own, like some people work on old cars)

          1. These are children taking a 4 week class, not college computer science majors (yet).

       2. Huh are they really that much cheaper? I do think for tweens and teens though, they’re going to prefer laptops.

          1. I would take my kids to Best Buy and see what their preferences are. No need to guess. Give them a budget and let them decide. My son went with a cheaper desktop in middle school that he still has. He now has a very fancy gaming laptop that he uses for all of his engineering classes.

   17. Just buy them new, but cheap, chrome books.

       Middle school students should really have some level of access to a computer at home

   18. Just buy them a basic $300-$400 computer

9. 49% of Republican men won’t get the vaccine according to new polling. I cannot.

   1. Yeah but like they say that? But I think they actually will get it

      1. Ugh, I hope so. My Trump-voting relatives who called it a “plandemic” made sure to be in group 1A to get vaccinated. I’m sure they would have literally thrown aside others to get it if they’d had to.

      2. See: The Former Cheeto in Chief

      3. Based on my very Trump-loving state, a lot of his supporters don’t want it. We’re now vaccinating everyone 16+ and we have same day appointments available all over the state because demand is so low. I think there’s more demand among older people, even Rs, because they’re aware they might die if they get it, but everyone under 60 who loves Trump is just like yeah, no, not getting it.

         1. Tennessee? Hell were vaccinating people from other states, demand is so low.

            1. And then there’s me driving all the way down to Richmond from upper NoVA because I can’t find anything closer. *sigh*

   2. IDK — I never respond to polls. Of any sort. Ever. Neither do my parents (Rs) or my spouse (D) or extended family (mix of D and R). The Ds are Kennedy-era Democrats and their descendants, so fairly conservative; the Rs are mainly fiscal conservative Episcopalians and small-town farmers. So I suspect that a “solid crackpots who answer polls” vote but also suspect that this is a wildly unrepresentative slice.

   3. there’s some hope. My own sister is an outspoken idiot on social media who will tell anyone who listens that she’s not getting the vaccine.

      However, I have it on good authority that she actually did get the vaccine in secret.

      1. Your sister is Donald Trump?

         1. She thinks she is.

            1. Thanks for the laugh

      2. Wtf is wrong with people? Ugh

      3. How do you resist the urge to call her out? I’d be blasting her on social media but I can be petty.

   4. Sucks for them, let them get sick and suffer the consequences, the rest of the world will take the shot and any boosters and remain healthy. If Jimbob is willing to sacrifice his life, and the health of his family (because goodness knows rural clinics can’t take the brunt of covid care) for his anti-science rhetoric, well so be it. I have no sympathies left, I do not wish them well.

      1. Hear hear!

      2. I agree w/you that I couldn’t care less about the lives of anti-vaxxers, but unfortunately the US will never really get out of the pandemic with 30% of the country unvaccinated. The virus will spread through the anti-vaxxers, reinfecting some of them and likely leading to variants that evade current vaccines even more than the existing variants, which creates problems for all of us. I’m not really worried about dying once I’m vaccinated, even in the face of variants, but unfortunately I think the short term school closures and travel restrictions and stuff like that are likely to last for years because we can’t get proper herd immunity with that many anti-vaxxers. I hate people.

   5. Who cares? It’s their choice whether to get the vaccine or continue to live with the risk of contracting COVID. The pearl clutching around COVID on this board…

      As for the comments denigrating Trump on the vaccine–there’s simply no question that Project Warp Speed is one of the great successes of his administration. And I’m not aware of any instance in which he questioned the safety of the vaccine or otherwise even hinted at resistance to taking it (in sharp contract to Vice President Harris, Governor Cuomo, Governor Whitmer, etc.)

      1. oh, hi sis!

         1. Looooooool

      2. Because Trump is such a degenerate a – hole, there was a legitimate concern that he would install yes men into the FDA to fast track an ineffective vaccine so he could declare this whole thing over as quickly as possible. We forget what a bumbling incompetent mess his administration was, even in Project Warp Speed was a success. If cared about anyone other than himself, he would have publisized his vaccine but he didn’t.

         But yes, I agree – who cares. At some point, the world will move on, and vaccine deniers have made their bed.

      3. Well if a huge part of the population remains unvaccinated, we can’t reach herd immunity and variants will continue to develop, requiring the rest of us to need booster shots instead of being over and done with this. An individual’s decision really affects everyone else.

         I’m not changing my life for them, but it’s silly to pretend it doesn’t matter.

      4. we’re all going to pay for their covid-related hospital costs, either through insurance premiums or taxes, so it does matter to everyone.

      5. wut

      6. You are aware that Pfizer wasn’t part of Operation Warp Speed. And no, given how he politicized masks, he doesn’t get any credit for vaccine development. That’s like burning down my house but expecting kudos that you called the fire department and didn’t impede them from putting the fire out.

      7. Anon at 3:41– scroll up and see the family decimated by covid- fatalities, hospitalizations- from a wedding. This is not pearl clutching. These are real people. Yes, Operation Warp Speed was successful. However, defending Trump on this basis is like him metronomically repeating during the debates “I closed the borders!”. Yes. But presidenting is hard and that is only one step. Making the vaccine is only one step. Getting people to take it will actually help bring this to an end. Many of the people who follow him are small minded conspiracy riddled people who live in the echo chamber of Parler, Gab, and Telegraph. He could lead by encouraging that group to get vaccinated. He chooses not to. Taking credit for the vaccine is also like saying you should win the heisman because you got all the way to the 2 yard line. Not enough. got to get it in the end zone.

10. I need an athletic sneaker recommendation for walking, some jogging around the neighborhood, and supervising team sports for a kids team. Not a runner (except if you count running for a train!). Something simple and without too much of a “drop” – want some cushioning, not a lot. Would prefer something in the under-$70 range.

    1. For this type of shoe, I usually go to the outlet stores, and find something that fits. Cheap is good but well-fitting is better and more important. In the pandemic, not sure how useful that is. Or you could order 3-4 pairs from a sporting goods store that has free returns and find one that fits. But I ran and walked and went to kid sports in “so-so” running shoes and developed plantar fasciitis shortly thereafter, so you really want ones that fit.

    2. Altra may work well for you. They don’t have much drop and they’re comfortable. I order mine from REI since you can return up to a year.

       1. Love my altras! For good deals check Amazon and the clymb
          My husbands bff works for them and the shoes are so comfortable. My feet can breathe!

    3. I buy older model Asics for this, although any older model running shoe is going to be super cheap compared to their latest and greatest models. The Gel Venture 7 is on sale for around $50 on a number of sites. You can also find Adidas CloudFoam at really low prices.

    4. I like my Adidas Cloudfoam sneakers. The exact model might be phasing out, but they have similar items.

       1. I have and love the Adidas Cloudfoam, but I would definitely not “jog” in them. They are great for a weekend of activity with my kids, but not anything athletic.

11. I need to share this and yall are the recipients :)

    I grew up in an Emily Gilmore-like environment. Painfully formal, a house of full of “do not touch” furniture and objects, appearances mattered a great deal, designated “play clothes” were coordinated outfits from boutiques and were not allowed to get dirty, etc. I have, much like Lorelai, rebelled against all that nonsense and live in a friendly, comfortable world where muddy pups climb on slipcovered sofas and feet are allowed on the coffee table.

    My mom just sent me a listing for an executive-type office chair – leather, nailhead trim, cherry wood – and suggested I buy it for our 8 year old son. I can’t stop laughing!! The disconnect – the absurdity – of buying such a thing for a lego-playing, Toy Story-watching, bed-jumping 8 year old – DYING! ???

    I’ve always used the Gilmore Girls analogy to describe my family, but I think this example might take the cake! ?

    1. Lol, that is pretty funny!!

    2. This made me smile. My parents were not as wealthy as the gilmore’s but my mom shared a lot of emily’s tendencies and insecurities. I rewatched the show a few years back and it was as startling to rewatch as an adult with some distance from that environment. Good for you for supporting your kid being a kid!

    3. funny! I’m from the other side of the tracks vs your upbringing, but this manifested in my hometown family thinking we were being pretentious by doing things like researching child car seats, etc.

    4. Hi! Emily’s other daughter here, just saying hello with my pup on the bed (oh the horror!)

12. You guys, that public health employee burning out is weighing on me. I was a public health professional making 27k once. I worked a second job and was also in grad school. Looking back from my cushy corporate job I have no idea how I did it.

    There are a lot of us that are sitting fat and happy while public health professionals are logging 95 hour weeks and they can’t buy a damn fancy coffee because they make peanuts.

    Is anyone interested in setting up a GoFundMe (with a cap) so we can each buy this ‘Rette a damn coffee? Or whatever it is she needs to take a break but doesn’t want to spend the money on (bagged salad, bubble bath, whatever)?

    I am absolutely slammed and don’t have the bandwidth to research how to make that happen/administer it but I would contribute if it was linked here–or somewhere else more appropriate.

    1. Yes.

       1. As in I would contribute.

          1. I would too. Happy to have the chance to make someone’s life a bit easier who has been working so hard for the greater good. I view it as way of saying “thank you.”

    2. She makes 60k, relax. That’s an above-average salary in the US and far from “peanuts.” I make less as a lawyer.

       1. Ok then don’t contribute. I will, OP.

          1. I will too. She’s helping handle a once-in-a-lifetime crisis. (At least I sure hope it’s once in a lifetime.) If I knew her I’d drop a rotisserie chicken on her doorstep so she could change it up from pizza. But I don’t, and would still like to send a well wish.

    3. This is a great idea.

    4. It’s nice to be aware that not everyone here is making 200k. I wish more people would keep this in mind.

       Signed, underpaid and overworked NGO worker.

    5. Hi, I’m the OP from this morning. That is very kind of you, but please do not do that! I’m doing fine financially (threw in salary only so I wouldn’t get advice of “get all your meals delivered. Uber to work and get a cleaning service” which is what is often suggested here.I definitely have the pocket change for coffee)

       Got dragged into meetings so didn’t get to comment again on that thread but wanted to thank you all for your suggestions and kind words and commiseration (especially the commiseration – it’s nice to be reminded I’m not the only public servant here!

       1. Hi! I’m a health care provider at a nonprofit hospital, serving mostly Medicaid and uninsured, and read the morning thread but didn’t have time to comment. I am also fine financially, but in a similar salary range with plenty of hard work to do these days. Thank you so, so much for working so hard for your community. I hope you can find a way to restore.

          I second the support you got today, and would love to see more dialogue here with readers in public service.

       2. Seriously, though – we know you’re not penniless, but those kinds of hours are tough without being able to “outsource” – which is what the $100k+ crowd around here does when things get busy. I’d be on board with a thank-you gift too. It’s not pity-coffee, it’s Thanks-for-saving-our-asses-coffee we’d like to buy you (and your colleagues if that’s available).

          1. (Perhaps Kat could facilitate some kind of Buy a Corporette (Multiple) Coffee fund or something?)

       3. I didn’t get to comment this morning, but — thank you for all that you are doing.

       4. Would you consider posting a burner so we could venmo you and you can buy coffee or fruit or yogurt or something else nice and healthy for your team? I’m all for donating to an organization but I like direct giving as well, and i bet you’d know where to spend the funds best.

    6. I will to. If she sets up a burner email address maybe we can email her with our Venmo (or ask hers individually) and send her money that way? Just thinking how to cut out Gofundme pointless middleman.

    7. This is weird. Would prefer to not start with random GoFundMe on this page.

       1. IKR

       2. Honestly same.

    8. As she said she doesn’t need it, I would look into local organizations. And advocate for larger budgets for social services moving forward.

    9. To this morning’s OP, I’d just like to buy you a coffee – if you post a Venmo I’d do what I do for all my friends when they’re working hard (send $ for a little pick me up)

13. Looking for tips on negotiating a good price on a new car. The last time I did this (a decade ago) I ordered a report on how much cars actually cost to the dealer for a small fee. I don’t recall the name of the report and don’t know if it’s even the best resource these days.

    1. It was AAA

       I’ve heard great things about carvana.

    2. There are lots of sources that purport to give you dealer invoice (that’s what you mean) but that may not reflect the price for all dealers. You can ask the dealer to see their invoice. The last car I bought, I paid $800 over base model invoice, then I bought the upgrades at dealer cost.

       The dealer invoice may not reflect ‘factory to dealer incentives’, the hurried fine-print reading you hear on car commercials. Those usually have something to do with how many cars they sell that month, overall or of a certain model. I didn’t feel entitled to that money being knocked off my price when I bought my new cars, so I was happy to pay a set amount over dealer invoice.

       I believe it’s still best practice to go to the dealer toward the end of the month, as that’s when they’re really trying to make their numbers for the month.

    3. Look at Consumers Report car-buying guide for the cost to the dealer and look at Edmunds.com for actual pricing in your area for the cars you are considering.

    4. I highly recommend the old article from the Toast, “How to Buy a Car Without Interacting With a Human.” I used many of the tips last year to buy a new car — basically pitted three dealers against each other and took the best offer, once I’d decided what I wanted.

       Be aware that supply is low this year due to manufacturing shortages and demand is up with fewer people wanting to take public transit. So you may not have as much negotiating power as in years past.

       1. I used a similar method last year. After figuring out exactly what car I wanted I emailed all the dealerships within 100 miles (about 30). Half responded. Half of those refused to negotiate via email so I was down to 7 dealerships. Three of those made substantially lower bids than the others. Negotiations ensued (all over email). When 2 dealerships told me the offer from the third dealership was so good I should take it, I knew that price was the best I could get.

          I created a separate email account for this so that I could delete it after the car purchase and not get spam messages in my personal email. It also allowed me to use a gender neutral nickname for negotiations. All dealerships assumed I was a man. I hope this did not impact pricing, but I suspect that it did. Walking into the dealership to pick up my car was fun :)

    5. Don’t negotiate in person. Test drive, then go home and negotiate over email so you can take time to evaluate the option without getting twitchy in the dealership chair.

    6. A friend used her USAA membership, apparently they will negotiate on your behalf up to a limit you set.

       1. They’ve done away with the Car Buying Service as of last November, unfortunately.

14. I had NPR on today and people were saying that Cuomo won’t resign or be pushed out b/c it is budget season in NY and any legislator who speaks against him won’t get funding for their district. That he will be another Ralph Northam (who might have been shoved out had a D not an R be the likely successor). The only wild card was that NY, particularly NYC, has a vicious press, which I am hoping is true. He has got to go. Doubly so for using our tax $ as a threat to legislators to deny funding to stuff we already paid for. I am so angry.

    1. Northam’s issues weren’t nearly as bad as Cuomo’s – one documented incident of wearing blackface (which while horrible) took place decades ago, not multiple incidents while in office

    2. I can’t tell if you live in NY but I do and I don’t want him to resign. Neither do the majority of voters in this state the last I checked. Let there be an investigation. Not everything he is accused of disqualifies him in my book and apparently enough NYers agree.

       I don’t think the comparison to Northam works other than maybe because he shouldn’t have resigned either and I’m glad he didn’t. He’s been a good governor. And your comment about NY’s ‘vicious press’ is weird! I love our press but I don’t think anyone should be cheering on journalists to run elected officials out of town. Let the voters do that – or not.

15. I bough the teal/jade crosshatch suit from Ann Taylor. In person, it is darker than depicted online with the best texture throughout. I wore the suit to an in-person interview for a Director-level position and got the job. I felt it was professional with a twist.

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