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Updated: Oct 30, 2018 189 Comments · by

Suit of the Week: Classiques Entier

Suit of the Week

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gray-stretch-suit-classiquesFor busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional. For this week's suit, I'm featuring a single-button style because I feel like we haven't seen a single-button in a while. This collar isn't quite a shawl collar, but I like it — it's a very classic look. This mostly-wool suit contains 3% spandex for a bit of stretch, which is always a wonderful thing in a suit. I like the menswear feel of the pattern, and I think the pant look like a good basic pant (no skirt available, unfortunately). The jacket (Classiques Entier® Stretch Wool Suit Jacket) is $299, and the pants (Wool Suit Pants) are $199. Classiques Entier® Stretch Wool Suit Here's a plus-size option: blazer + pants from Talbots. (L-all)

Sales of note for 9.10.24

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Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. anon

    Does MM LaFleur have a VIP sale at the end of the year? Did anyone shop there last year and remember what the selection was like? Good, or lucky sizes only?

    • Anonymous

      I scored a dress at the sale last year in a very popular size that typically sells out quickly. I can’t remember whether there was a good selection of sizes generally.

  2. Uniqlo Heat Tech

    OK — I’ve ordered a ton to help layer under work clothes in a freezing office. Any special care instructions? Are they just helpful as an underlayer or is there a treatment that goes away after X washings that does the magic. Greatful either way — 3 layers inside today (HT undershirt, regular shirt, open wool sweater jacket) and the draft blowing on my head is just stealing all my warmth.

    • Pears

      I just wash them in what color load they match with (so darks go in cold, whites go with whites) and hang dry. They hold up so well!

        • Scarlett

          I didn’t even know they weren’t supposed to go in the dryer – I always dry mine & they’re fine.

  3. Sydney Bristow

    I love this! The way the pockets seem slightly slanted seems like it would help give the appearance of a waist. And the 1 button jacket works best for me and my large chest.

    • NYNY

      I love it, too. Just wish there were a skirt option. I’ve been in search of a grey suit, but pants and my booty don’t play nice together.

      • Sydney Bristow

        Same here. This suit doesn’t come in my size anyway, but I’d definitely need a skirt option if I were going to buy it. Aside from a pair of jeans, I simply don’t own any other pants now.

      • Ellen

        Yay Kat. I am working to hard to be abel to respond promptly.

        As for the OP, Me too. I am to young to start wearing pant’s suit’s. Dad says I should b/c he think’s my short leg’s look better covered, but I do NOT want to start until I am OVER 60. FOOEY!

  4. Gift Memberships

    Someone on the morning thread mentioned giving gift memberships to the ACLU and Sierra Club. I love this idea! From a quick look at both websites it looks like the gift membership package would be sent to the recipient. Does anyone know if there’s a way to get the package sent to me so that I can actually give the membership in person? I would want the monthly magazine, etc. to be sent to the recipient, so I don’t want to just put my address when I sign them up. TIA!

    • Gifts

      I’m that poster. I had the same concerns.

      So I didn’t sign up online.

      I want to ask them to start the membership January 1st, and send me a pamphlet or something I can give to my relative on Xmas day.

      I left a message with the ACLU membership office, and am waiting for them to call me back. They are inundated with calls/donations currently (good sign!). But if I don’t hear back today I will email them my request.

      I’m calling Sierra club later today….

  5. Anonymous

    My sister-in-law and I have birth near the end of January on the same day. I had a boy and she had twin boys. Our sons are almost 11 months old. I’m dreading seeing her over the Christmas holidays and I feel so guilty about it. The reason being that she lost all the weight and I am overweight and haven’t even come close.

    So wore a corset right after the birth at all times except showering and she went on a diet. She hit the gym as soon as her sons were 8 weeks old, she had a tummy tuck and breast lift when they were 6 months and after the surgery she had laser scar removal for the surgery scars and stretch marks. I’ve seen pictures on Facebook and she looks great.

    We both work similar jobs in the same industry (finance). I haven’t lost any baby weight and have put on more since the birth. I hate feeling this way. My sister-in-law is a lovely person and I know looks aren’t everything and I have lots of good qualities but I keep imagining people silently comparing us when I see both of us. I only get these feelings when I think of her. The rest of the time I feel fine. And no matter what I do love my son and being a mom.

    I’m not sure what I am looking for, advice, commiseration or just venting, but I appreciate anyone who reads this. Thank you.

    • Godzilla

      Gurl, stop. You are awesome irrespective of your physical appearance. If it helps you, buy yourself some awesome clothes, get your hair did, do whatever. Your body made a little human, rejoice in that.

      • Senior Attorney

        Amen! Good grief, look at what you wrote. She went to gigantic extremes to lose the weight. Which is fine, that was her choice, but that’s not the standard for you or anybody else!

        Get yourself some great new outfits that fit and go and have fun! Nobody is going to be judging you — they’ll be too busy exclaiming over those three adorable babies!!

    • Anonymous

      Don’t let this be the thief of your joy. You had a great year! Mazel! Here, just run your own race.

      For me, I hate discomfort (so no post-baby corset). And I fear leaving my children without a Mom, so the very, very tiny chance that something would go wrong on an elective cosmetic procedure means that I’d pass on those. I know that Joan Rivers was having her throat looked at, but any time you are put under, there is a chance you will die (see, also, Clueless). So don’t feel back about your choices — they are valid choices!

      [I am so vain that were I to have work done, I would keep it totally under wraps, old-school Hollywood style.]

    • BT

      I doubt this will help, but I have to tell you: you just unintentionally made me feel great. I have twin toddlers and while I am basically my pre-pregnancy size in clothes, whoa, am I not even close to having my old body back (twin tummy, saggy boobs, stretch marks). And from time to time, I think, what would it take? And you just answered that for me: at least 2 elective surgical procedures and laser scar removal. And I barely find time to get my teeth cleaned.

      That is her priority. If you want it to be yours, then feel free to throw the time and money (it must be tons of money) that she has put into her body into yours. But you don’t have to. You can just buy drapey clothes like I do (or don’t and say F it) and call it a day.

      • Msj

        Amen. Also a twin mom of toddlers. Although it’s curious that they’d let her have surgery so close to her delivery. I’ve heard that you generally have to wait a year or more.

        • Anonymous

          Ha — I know one person who was stitched up, post-c-section in a manner that approximated a tummy tuck.

          [Just repeating what I heard — I have no idea whether this is medically possible / how you’d code for that, etc.]

          • Senior Attorney

            Yes, I have a friend who did this. Also had her tubes tied at the same time. Seems insane to me to have all that at once but there you have it…

    • Anonymous

      Her behavior sounds extreme. You need to be kind to yourself. You son is not even a year old. You’re body carried and birthed and a person. That leads to changes. I know what the pressure is like to ‘bounce back’ after having a baby. It can be hard. You are doing great.

        • ANON

          Two elective plastic surgery procedures months after giving birth seems extreme to me . . .

          • Anonymous

            I feel like if OP were asking whether she could get elective procedures after giving birth, we’d all be like, “RAWR, you do you!” and accuse any nay-sayers as bodyshamers. But since it’s the defenseless sister, we’re taking the easy way out to boost OP’s self esteem. Not great.

          • Anonymous

            Nah, I would say no if someone posted here asking if they should get plastic surgery right after giving birth. It’s not necessarily contrary to a ‘you do you’ attitude. Your body changes so much the first year post-partum that it does seem extreme to me to have plastic surgery before waiting to see where your body will ‘settle’ so to speak. Advising against it doesn’t mean you are judging someone who decides to do it anyway.

          • Lyssa

            It’s definitely extreme. That doesn’t mean that it’s wrong (that’s a question for her doctor – and I suppose her pocketbook), and it certainly doesn’t make her a bad person, but it’s definitely an unusual series of steps to take.

            (I have nothing against plastic surgery in general and could see getting a procedure related to my own post-pregnancy body myself at some point down the road, but two procedures less than a year pp is far more than most people would be up for.)

    • Meredith Grey

      Hugs! I have this feeling for a number of reasons with some close family members too. I especially relate to not really worrying about this unless I’m getting close to seeing them. It’s a hard place to be in, but you’re not alone if that helps!! Think about all of your positive qualities and try to remember how much you love yourself AND how much your family loves you, no matter what you look like. Repeat as needed when you’re at your family gathering. Hang in there!

    • Anonymous

      You’re awesome!

      Someone will always be judging. Just reading your post I caught myself being a judgy mcjudgerson about SIL going on a diet and getting a breast lift which probably means she didn’t BF.

      I was pregnant with twins the same time as my sister was due – her baby didn’t make it. So while it’s totally understandable that you wish you weren’t struggling with weight, snuggle your gorgeous baby and be glad for all the wonderful mommy moments.

      • Anonymous

        I was thinking the same thing… I bet your SIL is freaking out about having to see you because she thinks it will shine spotlight on how she “cheated” and she worries people will judge her for being superficial and people will think you’re better for being focused on your baby instead of your body.

        Seriously, we’re all being judged all the time. And if you’re worried about being judged you’re right that some people will judge you and you’re wrong that all people will judge you. And if it’s any comfort you’re simultaneously being judged and not being judged about the things you’re worried about being judged for AND you’re simultaneously being judged and not being judged about the things you’re NOT worried about being judged for!

    • Shopaholic

      I have a similar situation but without the babies. My sister is stick thin, I am not… And that’s an understatement. I hold a lot of weight in my belly, and around my hips/upper thighs so it’s not always easily hidden. We’re going on a family beach vacation in a few weeks and I’m dreading being in a bathing suit around her, to the point that it makes me sick to my stomach and I don’t want to go.

      That said, I know I’m being irrational and I’m not going to let it stop me from going, but I get the feeling… Be kind to yourself. You grew a person!

      • margarine

        I’m thin and my sister is not. She’s kind, upbeat and so smart she practically glows. I DO NOT GIVE A FLYING F*** ABOUT HER WEIGHT and I doubt your sister does either.

        • margarine

          Plus, like 99% of all women, I’m too busy worrying about how I look in a bathing suit to notice other people’s jiggles.

        • Korean American

          As a korean girl, nope, this has always been a comment that family/extended family / family friends have made/make and continue to make. My nuclear family knows now that it’s not okay, but the message has not spread across the culture. UGH.

          Also, the comments start when I was a size 6/8 and now, 20 years later, have totally become a self-fulfilling prophecy. UGH.

          Every other christmas they try to gift me a gym membership.

        • Anonattorney

          Well, it’s probably not a fear that her sister will comment on her weight, but that other family members will comment or compare. It happens. It’s hard on the heavier sibling (I say from personal experience).

          But, there’s no getting around it. I just always remind myself that life’s too short to worry about how I look in a bathing suit. I did swim classes at my snooty athletic club with my 6 month old and was dreading getting into a bathing suit so soon after the birth. But then I remembered that I was thinking about not doing such a fun activity with my brand-new baby based on stupid insecurity! I mentally slapped myself and woman’ed up. The funny thing is that most of the participants are dads anyway, which for some reason was less scary that being in a bathing suit in front of a bunch of other women. Oh well.

      • lawsuited

        You are not your weight. You are not your weight. You are not your weight.

      • Godzilla

        Being Godzilla, I, too, deal with a large stomach and thighs (and a tail, but I digress). Get you an awesome swimsuit! One of those cool retro ones. Or not. Or scuba gear. WHATEVER. Life is too short to hate the way you look.

    • Mrs. Jones

      Dude, I’m judging your SIL more than you. Enjoy the family time and baby’s first Xmas!

        • anon

          I assume “why would you be judging her SIL” comes from the same person who wrote above asking how SIL’s behavior could be considered extreme. Cosmetic surgery six months after baby to remove all traces of bearing said baby is extreme. And some might judge that.

          • Anonymous

            It wasn’t me who asked that question about her behavior being extreme. I was just honestly curious as to why anyone would judge the SIL (or the OP).

    • lawsuited

      I have to say, it would never occur to me to compare you and your SIL’s bodies, whether you had given birth at the same time or not. I think this is a case of you thinking more about your pre-baby body than anyone else will.

  6. Losing a size?

    I spent the past 1 year (sort of) sick and (therefore) tired. My throat was always scratchy (it turns out not to be a series of colds, but a tumor (since excised and with only some minor follow-on issues). I felt awful and probably ate a couple of bags of cough drops a day to help with my scratchy throat and conserve my voice. I also wasn’t really exercising during this time.

    I am not surprised that my clothes no longer fit (starting with the summer ones and now with the winter ones). I’ve gone shopping twice and am now at the point where I am feeling better and well enough to get myself back into shape. My weight is only up a couple of pounds, but my body composition is noticeably less lean (but probably by a size through the waist/hips; upper body seems rather static).

    Is this wishful thinking? At my age (40-something) and with a FT job and young children, I am not optimistic that I can do much more than control my eating (easy enough: the coughdrop habit is no longer needed and I won’t go crazy with the holiday grazing and will otherwise be reasonable and moderate in food intake). The exercize part of the equation though, I’m not so sure of. Any annecdata that this is do-able (say with some progress by February)?

    I need someone to help cheer this sister on!

    • ace

      Sorry if I’m misunderstanding, but if your question is whether you can lose a size w/o exercising – YES. Most weight loss comes from better diet not exercise (the split is something like 80/20).
      Exercise is good for you for other reasons, so at some point you should try to fit exercise into your life, but don’t be deterred from starting to eat healthier b/c you can’t exercise at the same time.
      Glad you are well!

    • CMT

      I recommend getting a food scale and downloading an app like MyFitnessPal. Those two things together helped me lose 20 pounds this last year.

      • Anonymous

        Hells no.

        The last thing I want in a day is more tasks and more data to input.

        • Godzilla

          Doing this is a pita. I’ve found it more effective for me to prepare/consume meals that fit within a calorie restriction so the calorie counting is done beforehand, no need to log anything.

          • CMT

            You’re still doing the calorie counting then . . . You don’t need to do it as you eat with an app, either.

        • CMT

          Well, then good luck to you! But if you want to lose weight through diet alone, you need to keep track of what you’re eating. This is the best way to do it.

          • BPT

            Correction: If you want to lose weight (by any means), you have to have a calorie deficit. Some people manage to do that without tracking. Some people need more structure and have to track calories. Some people can achieve this by just cutting out snacks and sweets. Some people have to weigh everything they do. But tracking what you eat is not the only way to achieve a calorie deficit.

    • ANP

      Yep yep yep! You can totally do this. I went on a Whole30 a couple of months ago and although that’s a fairly extreme diet change, I lost (and kept off) a ton of weight (8% of my body weight in a month) just by changing what went into my mouth. Whole30 might not be for everyone but man do I feel better when I eat clean, and the weight loss was a great thing for me. I enjoy working out but never have the time, so YES food-only can have a huge impact.

  7. Meredith Grey

    What time do you all eat breakfast relative to when you wake up? I had gotten into a routine over the last month of waking up ~ 5:30am, having coffee, and working out. This prevented me from having an appetite all the way through showering, getting dressed and commuting. I’d get to work around 9am and then chow down on eggs or oatmeal heated up at the office. The past few days I’ve been soooooo hungry before leaving for work, that I’ve eaten protein-rich breakfast (eggs + cottage cheese) only to still be so hungry the rest of the day. Which version sounds more like your normal?

    • anon

      I work out immediately after waking up. Drink a protein shake, go to work and eat breakfast there.

      • anon

        I chug a pint glass of water immediately after I wake up though. Not sure that’s relevant or helps… I eat a similar breakfast too. Once your metabolism increases so does your appetite so that’s good!

        • Meredith Grey

          Interesting…. and is your hungry at bay until lunch? I guess I should’ve included that in above post… I’m not exercising like an Olympian either… this is so annoying!!

          • anon

            Sometimes. Sometimes not. I always pack a snack just in case like yogurt and berries or almonds at work and I would say maybe once a week I eat the snack because despite my breakfast I am still so hungry about an hour or so before lunch.

    • Anonymous

      I eat within 5 minutes of waking up. Otherwise, my blood sugar is circling the drain and I have zero energy. I am hungry again by the time I get to work (so I eat lunch as close to 11 every day as possible).

    • Emmer

      I have a bite of something protein- or fat- rich (cube of cheese or a few nuts) before I walk my dog, about a half hour after waking up. Then I eat a bigger breakfast – usually oatmeal or toast with PB&J – when I get to the office, about 2 hours after waking up.

      When I used to work out in the mornings I would definitely need to eat as soon as I got out of bed so I’d have time to digest before working out (I was useless in the gym if I didn’t eat).

    • CMT

      I work out at 5:30, have a piece of toast with peanut butter before I go to work, then usually between 9:30 and 10:30 I eat yogurt and seeds. I added the toast and peanut butter to this routine because I was always hitting the vending machine before lunch. I need something with fat in it to keep me full in the morning.

      • Meredith Grey

        Oh, I have been blaming this hunger on not enough protein. I didn’t think it was fat… How’s your mid-afternoon hunger? Anything remarkable?

        • Anonymous

          +1

          I like to run in the mornings, and for awhile was hungry all the time and trying to figure out how to get more protein. Then I started adding more fat and found it keeps me full considerably longer. Whole milk yogurt is my favorite thing these days.

          • Meredith Grey

            CMT and Anonymous, I dunno if you’re checking back here, but added more fat this morning and already feeling a gazillion times better. Thank you soooo much!!

    • emeralds

      I eat when I get to work regardless of when I wake up, so I’m eating between 7:30 and 8. Breakfast rotates between overnight oats, a green smoothie + nut butter, PB&J, or greek yogurt + fruit + granola. Whether or not I work out, regardless of how much I eat, I’m always hungry again by 11, so I usually just eat lunch super-early and have a lighter afternoon snack.

    • anon

      I eat something small before lifting. I can (and prefer to) run on an empty stomach, but I get woozy if I lift on an empty stomach. I’ll have a hard boiled egg or toast with almond butter when I get up, which gives me about 30-45 minutes between the time I eat and I actually start my workout. I have my normal breakfast at work around 9.

    • Anon

      I’m more hungry when I wake up if I didn’t eat a filling enough dinner, or if I ate dinner too early (before 7pm).

    • NYCer

      I wake up around 6 or 630am and eat around 915am when I am at work. I usually exercise 3 days a week before work, but that doesn’t change my breakfast time. I only have water before I workout and while I am getting ready.

  8. EPA

    Really? The Head of the EPA is the AG from Oklahoma? Really? Where they are having earthquakes because of fracking? REALLY?!?! I can’t take this anymore.

    • Anonymous

      Man, I hate to be that person, but… if anything, the earthquakes in Oklahoma being caused by saltwater disposal, not fracking. It’s still a production-related cause, but it’s very unlikely fracking is the cause, but rather the injection of leftover fracking fluids into the earth as a disposal method.

      That aside, it’s insane that the head of the EPA will be the AG from Oklahoma. This man has sued the EPA multiple times, most notably to prevent enforcement of the Clean Power Plan.

      • anon

        But for fracking, it’s not likely the earthquakes would have happened though. Regardless of what stage is causing it. But hey, good to know.

        • Anonymous

          That’s absolutely true. I only mean to point it out because there are a lot of companies working on finding alternative ways to recycle/dispose of fracking fluid, which would dramatically reduce the need to inject fracking fluid back into the ground as a means of disposal. And to the extent that this disposal is the cause of the earthquakes, alternative disposal methods would mean we could reduce or eliminate the earthquakes without having to prohibit fracking.

          (Admittedly, I’m an oil and gas attorney in Texas, but super liberal and reconciling my pro-environment belief system with my work in the industry)

          • Another Anon O&G Attorney

            Thank you! Yes it seems like a minor detail, but it’s the kind of detail that can help direct the conversation to a workable solution.

    • Anonymous

      Official slogan for 2016: “REALLY?!?! I can’t take this anymore.”

    • AIMS

      Ben Carson released a statement saying he is not qualified to run a federal agency and then got nominated to run a federal agency. I think “Really?” is out the window.

      • Sydney Bristow

        But he’s totes qualified for this one because he grew up in public housing and became a doctor. /sarcasm

        • Anon in NYC

          Actually Carson didn’t grow up in public housing, just not in “economically stable” neighborhoods (per the Washington Post).

          • Sydney Bristow

            Oops. Shows you how quickly I skimmed the article I read about it.

          • Sydney Bristow

            Oh nope, I just checked and the NYT issued a correction. I really did read that. Thought I was going a little crazy.

    • Bonnie

      I’m more concerned that the guy who will be running the EPA, is currently suing the EPA.

      • anon

        Right? Logistically the new AG takes over all the cases but realistically, what’s he going to do to stop those cases? Not much…

    • KateMiddletown

      Unrelated to this – did you post a review for the Baby Feet product? I just used Tony Moly Shiny Feet earlier this week and I’m eagerly awaiting the results…

    • CMT

      Jesus. That man is a creepy, out of line, control freak. I feel so sorry for her.

      • Anonymous

        He’s terrible. On the plus side, Joe M. seems to adore her and he’s ok to look at. I’m glad she’s put the creepy dude behind her and found happiness.

    • Bonnie

      Especially since he wants the embryos to be used so they can use their trust fund?

    • emeralds

      Jesus Christ. I keep thinking 2016 can go no lower and I keep being wrong.

    • SC

      The attempt to get this into court in Louisiana, after he withdrew his suit from California to avoid discovery, is ridiculous.

    • Anonymous

      Is this real? I haven’t seen it reported by any real news source, just Page Six, Daily Mail, etc., which make things up all the time.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      If this is real, it is a very interesting legal issue. Women have the right to terminate a pregnancy and don’t need the father’s consent because she has a right to her body, is not an incubator, etc. What he wants to do with the embryos does not involve her body. He would use a surrogate. I am not saying he is in the right. Very far from it. It is just a legal issue that has not yet been decided to my knowledge. I would prefer if he was suing in his own name for his rights. I hate that an embryo is being named and given legal rights in this case.

      • Anonymous

        It would be a landmark case if Louisiana allows the cast to proceed on the merits.

        As I understand it, her ex is equating indefinite freezing of embryos with “killing” them. Thus, if the embryos are suing, and the court recognizes an embryos right to sue (as represented by a guardian/trustee) their personhood would be acknowledged and they would get all of the rights associated with such legal status.

        This reeks to me of an attorney/interest group wanting to forward an agenda at a much higher level than a contract/property battle between estranged ex-spouses.

      • lawsuited

        A woman’s right to continue or end an existing pregnancy is related to her agency over her own body. Once the embryo is in her body, it is part of her body, and she necessarily has agency over it because to deprive her of agency over the embryo would be to deprive her of agency over her body. The issue of agency over one’s body is not in play with Loeb and these embryos. He can continue to exercise agency over his body without reference to the embryos.

        He appears to be asserting his right to make decisions for his “children”, which is a right a mother and father share equally. (I say “children” because I have serious misgivings about the legal personhood of embryos.) Loeb has no greater right to make the decision to implant and bring to term the embryos than Vergara has to make the decision not to do that.

  10. Engines

    My business casual office just announced we’re switching to casual. I am the only person around who seems bummed about this. I love dressing up, and I’ve spent the past year-and-a-half curating an excellent work wardrobe. I know I can still mix blouses and blazers with my jeans, but I’ve been wearing pencil skirts and dresses at least 4 days a week for the past year-and-a-half and don’t want to give them up. I already dressed in the dressier side of business casual, so I’m very resistant to the change. I will likely continue to wear business-ish casual for 3 days a week.

    Not a question… just complaining.

    • Sydney Bristow

      I was on an assignment once that was supposed to be casual dress. I don’t own anywhere close to enough clothes to dress casual every day. I was also the only one bummed. I just kept wearing my normal skirts and tops. I was just temping though so it didn’t really matter. Personally I prefer business casual or working from home in sweats. There isn’t much in between in my wardrobe.

  11. Frugal female

    Where do you buy your make-up, and why?

    What great deals do you use online, or wait for?

    • Anonymous

      I buy so little makeup that I could buy La Mer and still not spend a ton of $. Bare Minerals, some Burt’s Bees lip crayons, and some Anastasia eyebrow stuff. Nail polish sometimes. Sephora has a big yearly sale (which I think you just missed).

    • Meredith Grey

      Sephora because I highly value shopping online. Shopping for make up online might seem crazy, but Sephora saves all of your past purchases so you can look up what colors you got and there is a matching program to similar things if you want to try something new. You get samples with every order, shipping is super fast every time (you can pay once a year for 2 day free shipping, but I never have and rarely have to wait much longer for my stuff), AND they have a super good return policy. Once you reach a certain number of rewards, you’re eligible to sales.

    • Pears

      I love Prescriptives and wish it were still sold in stores, but at least its online with free shipping always. I like it because 1) I’m not allergic to it and 2) it matches my ghostly pale skin tone.

    • Cat

      Clinique, mostly. The products play well with my skin and I’m happy with the quality-for-price. I spend less than $200/year on makeup, though (some years a lot less than that, depending on when I use stuff up).

    • Anon

      I use Trish mcEvoy for a couple of products, and other items I get from Sephora. I can wait for a 15-20% off sale at Trish McEvoy’s website to buy products by being on their mailing list.

      Sephora has discounts less often but there’s always a coupon code for freebies with an order. Ebates is a good place to find those.

      I use the following products.

      Trish mcevoy eye base essential (eyeshadow base that I basically wear as eyeshadow)
      Dior BB cream
      Stila pen eyeliner
      Clinique eyebrow pencil
      Tarte blush
      Laura merrier sheer lipstick

    • Anonymous

      Mine’s all drug store/Ulta except I got TheBalm Matte eyeshadows hoping they’d be longer-lasting, and for the most part they are.

  12. anonalisa

    Has anyone had experience with recurring bacterial vaginosis? It’s driving me crazy.

    • anon

      Women specific probiotic helped me. That made no sense as a recommendation but I was so sick of it. I went to a health food store. In person. And talked to the recommended person. It’s $40 a bottle but so worth it. Really helps with digestion and illness prevention too. I had taken them here and there in the past but this is a woman specific one that has to be kept in the refrigerator.

      If you are having unprotected lady garden parties make sure your partner cleans his stuff well too. I found it was also specific to reoccur with certain partners and I don’t know what they do to clean it. But all together both helped.

      good luck. sry that sux

    • Anon

      I recently read a news article about this exact problem – the Superhero in the Va Jay Jay in The Atlantic. (except they used the actual V word). Check it out.

    • anomanom

      Probiotics and elimination of sugar and dairy for about 6 weeks is what finally worked for me.

    • Fixer upper

      A once weekly boric acid suppository helps me (I keep doing it for maintenance) Also, second the female specific probiotics.

      • Anonymous

        I’ve used boric acid as well when I have bv or yeast infections. My ob/gyn recommended it. I also take probiotics.

    • lost academic

      Supposedly it’s related to an incompatibility with your partner’s native bacteria in the gardening areas. One would think over time your body would adapt but maybe it never does.

  13. Anonymity

    I love the suit. And I’m again saddened that Classiques rarely comes in petite (height) sizes. I’ve got some summer-weight 3/4 sleeve jackets but otherwise no go.

      • Bonnie

        Petite clothing isn’t just shorter. When done correctly, the garment is sewn completely differently.

        • Pears

          Yes. I’m not petite in height but I wear petite tops and dresses because they fit my high waist better.

  14. Blerg.

    Looks like husband and I are headed for marriage counseling. I love him dearly, but there have been issues brewing for awhile and lo and behold, they’ve come to the forefront as a result of the Presidential election.

    Don’t have anyone I feel as though I can share this with in real life. Just feeling kind of down.

    • Mel

      Hugs. I hope everything works out with counseling. It is good you are addressing it rather than just exploding. You guys are really taking a healthy approach.

    • Anonymous

      *hugs*

      if it doesn’t ‘click’ with the counselor, don’t give up.

      We switched marriage counselors from someone with a general counseling practice to someone trained in Gottman methods and it’s way more effective and efficient.

  15. Just A Little Crush

    Anyone have advice for getting over an incipient crush on a friend? I can feel it starting…Friend is recently out of a relationship (we met a couple years ago, when he was still in a couple) and is now hanging out with my friend-group quite a bit more. He’s great, which is why we’re friends! …but some things he’s said make me think we’d make a terrible couple, even if he were interested (and not super on the rebound too!). And if he’s not interested, that would be super awkward. I’m kind of terrible at hiding my feelings, in general. So, anyone have suggestions for still managing to hang out with this friend, not seeming squirrelly there, but also not encouraging myself? I’ve planned to not do solo activities with Friend, and avoid solo communications (texts etc). Sadly this time of year is kind of awful for setting up other dates and hoping I’ll get distracted by a new relationship!

    • Anonymous

      This is may be a little extreme, but I would m4sturb4te before going out to see a guy friend I had an inappropriate crush on. It cut the s3xual tension and helped me see him as something other than a s3xual being. Not having those rose-colored glasses on let me see him for the not really available, pretty immature guy he really was.

    • Anonymous

      Wait. You two are both single. You get along well. Enjoy it. Crush away. Get drunk and kiss him under the mistletoe

      • Just A Little Crush

        Eh, it may end up happening anyway. But he’s said some stuff about how he is in relationships (both in terms of like, jealousy stuff, and in terms of s3x) that makes me think we’d make it a few months and then hardcore crash and burn. And I’m really enjoying this friend group, there’s already been some drama with another couple, and I’d hate to be the cause of more. If I thought we were likely to make a good couple then hell yeah, I’d consider going for it! But if it’s going to end badly, I’d rather not start…

        • Anonymous

          I don’t think you have to make a big announcement about it. You can always do a discreet FWB thing and then if you’re not compatible, go back to being friends. If you start falling for each other then you can become an official couple and tell people.

          • January

            Eh, I’d be careful – sometimes a FWB thing can cause as much drama (or even more) as a “relationship,” especially if one person went into it with more feelings than the other. Know yourself!

    • Anonymous

      I was in the situation and the rebound issue was what I used to remind myself not to even consider it. It helped that I had been pretty badly hurt in another rebound situation so it was easy to follow the no-rebound rule. ESPECIALLY after I saw what a mess he was with the eventual rebound girls. Wait it out.

      • Anony

        I lost one of my best friends by sleeping with him when he was rebounding. I still miss him.

    • nutella

      There is a Buddhist philosophy to counter attachment by focusing on the unattractive things about someone/something. Everyone has negative qualities or traits, find them and think about them enough to neutralize the crush – that is if you want to not crush. I mean don’t focus on them such that you can’t stand being around him if you want to remain platonic friends, but that would be my suggestion.

      • Boom

        Had a crush on a dude at work before I started there full time (was interning). Turns out dude is really really difficult to work with and immature (bathroom jokes. We are adults. STOP). Boom. Crush gone.

  16. Networking

    Anyone have any advice on networking to find a new job? I am going to events, but I can’t figure out how to say “I am really looking for new opportunities.” I am not thrilled with my current job and would love to move on, but I also don’t want to sound like such a Negative Nancy at bar events.

    • Anonymous

      Do you know what you are looking for in a new position? If so I’d seek out people doing that kind of work and ask them about their role, the kinds of skills required, how they got to where they are, etc. It’s awkward to walk up to someone you don’t know and just say “I’m looking for a new job.” But most people like to talk about themselves so having a targeted set of questions to ask can be helpful. “I’ve been interested in moving to X industry. How did you get started in it?”
      Also, networking is a give and take relationship. Think about what you can offer these folks. What are they interested in professionally and how can you help them? Can you introduce them to someone or share a resource?
      The chances of a job miraculously appearing at one of these events is slim (at least I assume…I’m not a lawyer). But the relationships you build over time can only serve to help you. In my experience the payoff of networking is often seen months or even years down the line and are the result of professional relationships that have grown over time.

    • Anon

      “Oh, you work at XYZ. I’ve heard (good things, bad things, nothing) about that company. Do you like the work environment there?”

      This will hopefully lead to a question back to you about your work environment and then you can say it’s fine but you are looking for something more (exciting, stable, interesting, different)

  18. Roomba Recs

    Does anyone have any advice on choosing a roomba model? There are so many choices and I’m wondering how much the quality/effect differs across the different models. Looking to get one mostly for dog shed cleanup between house cleanings. 1200 square foot house with all hard surfaces (hardwood and tile) and a couple of small rugs.

    • Anonymous

      I actually really like the neato over the roomba. it cleans in a grid-like pattern which doesnt let it miss any spots unless you have something blocking the way.

      • Terry

        Does the neato require magnetic strips on the floor if you want to restrict it from a certain area? I was leaning against the neato for that reason but I’d be glad to hear real experiences with it.

        • sfbae

          yes, it does. i think we ordered a bunch of the strips off of amazon for ~$20 and they work fine, we set them out once a week before work and come back to things vacuumed and I put them away. I really like how neat (ha) it is – you can see the lines on our rug where it vacuums back and forth. Also i think when we purchased the neato was $100 less than the roomba – not sure how that has changed.

  19. Batgirl

    This is a little late in the day for this post to get responses probably, but I’d like to get my mother a “grandmother” necklace of some sort. I’d like to go somewhere reputable but given the style of necklace, it feels more like an etsy kind of thing. Which isn’t to say etsy isn’t reputable, but I’d like to go somewhere we could add gems/stones/figurines to as she has more grandchildren (yes, this is totally something she’d be into, I promise). Any ideas? Thanks!

    • Anonymous

      Not sure how you feel about Stella and Dot (I usually try to avoid) but I feel like my Facebook friends who sell it are often hawking this type of jewelry. I don’t know for sure but I bet they’d have some “grandmother” jewelry

    • Anon

      I got one for my mother at a company called Lifetime Mothers. I also bought my niece a mother’s necklace there and both items were exactly as pictured and well made.

      My mom loves her grandmother necklace. She has 13 grandchildren!

    • Batgirl

      Apologies for the late reply, but thanks SO much. I will check all of these sites out.

  20. Question

    I am informally renting my good friend’s vacation home while I complete a work stint out of my home city (EU). I’ve run into a bit of an issue. The house has a caretaker who lives nearby. It is the same caretaker that has been around since before my friend ever bought the house. The caretaker, an older lady, is a bit pushy about doing things around the house (cleaning, etc, when I prefer to clean on my own and not with super strong products) and tends to just drop by whenever she wants (7:00 am, 23:00 pm). Just today I had to be quite firm about it not being a good time as I had a conference call from home. Any advice on tactfully dealing with this? It’s great to be in this house, and I’d prefer not to bother my friend, but would love to improve the situation with the caretaker even though my stay here is not forever.

    • Anonymous

      I think you’re going to have to bother the friend, though personally I would only do so about the fact that she drops by unannounced super early and late into the evening. I would just drop your friend a note and explain that you’d like the caretaker to let you know when she’s coming over and/or only come over at certain times. I think that’s fully reasonable, and technically your friend is the caretaker’s boss so it’s her purview not yours. On the cleaning products front, I would just let it go. It’s not your house, so how it gets cleaned isn’t really up to you. (But again you can request that it be cleaned only at reasonable times and with advance warning.)

      • lost academic

        I don’t know – I think the cleaning products are a point to discuss if not necessarily a hill to die on. Some cleaning products, especially if they’re not being used correctly, are going to create very real problems, not just “I don’t like this scent” ones. How long is this rental for?

    • Anonymous

      Does “informally renting” mean you’re crashing there without paying anything? If so I think you kind of just have to live with it. If you’re actually paying rent, I agree you can contact your friend about when the caretaker is arriving and ask that they set up an agreed upon schedule and let you know when it is. I agree with Anon above that you don’t really get much say about how they place is cleaned since it’s not your house.

      • OP

        I’m paying under market rent. Setting a regular schedule sounds like a great solution that could make us both happy, actually. I’ll ask the caretaker if that is something we can do. Thanks!

    • Brunette Elle Woods

      If you are actually paying any amount of rent, I would just tell your friend to inform the housekeeper that you do not need her to come by at all while you are there and you will be leaving on X date when she can resume her normal routine.

      • OP

        This was my first instinct but I talked myself out of it – I kind of get the feeling that friend also has had to bow to caretaker (it’s like the lady came with the house – I don’t know what the original connection is).

      • OP

        Hahaha. I do tend toward neurotic/hermit and HATE having people in my space unless invited/I’m prepared so this is actually way out of my comfort zone. I’m a neat freak and have never hired a housekeeper myself. Caretaker was not mentioned when the deal was made!

      • Anonymous

        Uh, didn’t Jamie tell you about the time Aurelia let his typed manuscript blow into the pond full of eels?!

  21. Anonymous

    Kind of a weird question but here goes… my husband and I got a dog a couple of years ago and since then he’s become very reluctant to take vacations that are longer than a weekend away, because he feels bad about leaving the dog. We’ve taken exactly one real vacation since we got the dog, and the dog stayed with my parents who adore her and vice versa. I’m sure she was a little confused the day we left, but after that she probably had the time of her life and was totally spoiled. But my husband won’t stop talking about how cruel it was to her and how sad it made him. I’m trying to plan a vacation for this summer (one week in Europe, nothing crazy) and he’s refusing to go, saying he can’t bear to leave the dog. I think part of is that he doesn’t like traveling as much as I do, and so he’s using the dog as an excuse, but I also think he is kind of weirdly attached to this dog (whom I love so, so much as well, but I think she’s an animal who can be away from us for one week, so long as she’s being well-cared for by people she knows). I can and do travel solo and with friends, but I’ll be really sad if I can never travel with him again (despite his pre-trip grumbles, he’s an excellent travel companion). We had kind of an informal agreement when we got married that we’d do one real trip a year so long as we could afford it, and I don’t really see the dog as a good reason to change that, but he does. I kind of feel like he’s choosing the dog over me and it’s making me really sad, but maybe I’m being dramatic. Advice?

    • Anonymous

      Tell him. “I feel like you are bailing on an important part of our relationship because of your irrational fears about the dog.”

    • Anonymous

      I have a hard time believing this has anything at all to do with the dog.

      Can you ask what exactly he’s concerned about with leaving the dog with your parents?

      A dog doesn’t really know the difference between a weekend and a week, not in any way that really matters.

      • OP

        He says he’s concerned that the dog is sad and worried that she’s being abandoned when we leave and that as time goes on she becomes more convinced we’re not coming back (which is why he’s more ok with a weekend then a week – although it’s not like we’re going away for the weekend regularly). He also says that he just misses her too much. He doesn’t dispute that my parents are fine caretakers and agrees that staying with them is better for her than a dog walker or kennel or something like that.

        • Anonymous

          Dogs don’t think like this. Maybe you could talk to your vet or a dog trainer to help him get some insight on dog psychology. They might be enough of an unbiased expert source to help him get past that.

          But, really though, I don’t think it’s about the dog.

        • Senior Attorney

          This is not in any way rational.

          Can he talk to the vet or trainer or somebody he’s find credible about how the dog isn’t going to be sad and worried?

    • Anonymous

      That’s … pretty unreasonable. I ADORE my dog, and I travel all the time. I do refuse to board her at a kennel though. I have a dog walker come 3x a day to take her for a 30 minute walk (or take her out to pee and play with her inside if it’s raining). It costs $45/day which adds up on longer trips but isn’t really that much more than a kennel and makes her much happier. She texts me pictures of my dog being adorable while I’m gone too. She came over to meet both me and the dog before I hired her the first time (called her based on a rec from a friend). My dog loves her.

      I’m not sure what the best way to phrase the question is, but could you ask him to specifically articulate why he believes it’s cruel to the dog to leave town? I think if you can get him to try to articulate it you might either 1) find the source of the issue or 2) get him to realize he’s being really unreasonable.

    • nika

      Sorry if this sounds crazy, but is this a rescue dog with abandonment issues? If so I kind of see your husband’s point.

      If the dog does not have separation anxiety or a past with abandonment then I think he should go on the trip.

      Dogs have many leaders, but only one master. Sounds like for your dog that might be your husband.

      Not trying to take sides, but I always take the dogs point of view on things. If you need suggestions about therapies to help your dog, I will be happy to try to help.

      • OP

        Yes, she is a rescue dog, who is very shy and not good with strangers and she displays some symptoms of separation anxiety (when we initially didn’t allow her in bed with us she cried and scratched at the door until we gave in). But when we left her with my parents (who live close by and whom she knows well), she seemed perfectly happy. They sent us daily photos and videos while we were gone and she looked just as playful and fun-loving as she looks at home, was snuggling them and playing with her toys just like she does normally, and they said they didn’t notice any crying, chewing or excessive barking or anything like that. I’m open to suggestions if you have them, but I don’t think our dog really needs treatment. She was definitely happy to see us when we got home from our trip, but she also seemed to be totally happy with my parents. My husband’s opinion that she was sad is more based on what he thinks she is feeling based on the fact that she was brought to new people and her owners disappeared, not on any tangible behavior she actually displayed.

        • nika

          Sounds like she has adjusted well to your parents. If husband is that concerned with her being at your parents, leave a thundershirt and small dose melatonin. That should allay any fears your hubby may have regarding the dog. It sounds like your folks will not even need that.

          This would fall squarely to hubby then.

  22. I could be your husband.

    I could be your husband – I nearly cancelled a trip in 2 weeks out of fear of leaving our very needy Golden. I wish I could articulate why I feel so much anxiety leaving him, but he does fine with our neighbors and friends who have watched him in the past.

  23. Lizzie

    HELP! I am new to a small/mid size firm and it’s tradition to do some sort of skit/performance at the Holiday party. It usually ends up kind of being a burn/roast of the partners (and very encouraged). In the past, people have presented it in all sorts of way. Like someone once wrote a “letter from camp” to his parents about firm life and roasted all the partners in the letter. Someone once got up a did a tutorial about something she did that she was always asked about (no roasting, but apparently it was so funny and people are still talking about it). So help.

    It seems the normal route is just a poem/song and I will probably end up with that, but has anyone had to do something like this and have any more creative suggestions? I’m stressing.

    • Senior Attorney

      Top Ten list of best/worst things about working for the firm/partners?

      • Senior Attorney

        Also, you’ll get more traffic if you post in the newest thread from today.

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