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Well, I finally did it: After years of the readers singing the praises of the BBG and then the Sweat App, I finally signed up.
And, as always, you guys were right — it's awesome.
Here's a mini-review, particularly if you're wondering how the Sweat App compares to NROLFW, Fitbod, or other lifting for women programs.
This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!*
As a bit of background about the app: It was started by influencer Kayla Itsines after her hugely popular “Bikini Body Guide,” which — if memory serves — was originally a short workbook with exercises. (Her guides are still available for $53-$93 if you prefer that!) As part of the app, she's now joined by numerous other teachers, including people who specialize in weightlifting, cardio, and yoga.
To be 100% honest, I haven't tried the entire app, but the three programs I've started run similarly — you pick a program, and then you get 3–4 workouts a week in addition to suggested additional workouts like HIIT or LISS. You can hunt around on the app to find workouts outside of your program if you want. Each workout also has a recommended, but optional, warm-up and cool-down sequence.
{related: I still love my adjustable dumbbells!}
The workouts each take 30–40 minutes. I've only done BBG and the “Lifting at Home” program (and I just started the LAH challenge track yesterday), but the workouts in each were similar — when you start the timer, you start a set of 2–3 exercises, complete with gifs of the exercises and further explanations if you want to click on them. (This was one of the things I LOVED about the FitBod app.) They either recommend how many exercises you should do, or there is a timer, for how long you should do them (generally 30 or 60 seconds). You'll cycle through these same 2–3 exercises for 3–4 laps, then move onto a second set of exercises, then a third, and then a fourth; the fourth is generally a set of ab exercises.
I started out doing BBG 1.0 but then decided it seemed too easy (lots of resistance band exercises), so I've moved on to Lifting at Home with Stephanie Sanzo — everything is very doable.
Big pros to SWEAT: There are a ton of multi-week tracks to do. I think the BBG one I started with was 9 weeks, and the LAH track I was doing was 15 weeks. I love that there are gifs of the exercises. While there are tracks that are designed to be done at the gym, there are also ones designed to be done at home or, in fact, anywhere.
Big cons to SWEAT: None, really?
Minor notes for improvement: While there's a place for “notes,” I wish they had a cooler way to track how much weight you're lifting, like Fitbod did. I also wish that the weeks didn't all necessarily begin on Monday. I also liked that the Fitbod app highlighted which muscles you were supposed to be working, which I thought helped me with form.
Comparing Sweat to Other Lifting Programs for Women
SWEAT App vs. Fitbod App: They're similar apps in that they're great for all levels of strength training, and they show you gifs of the exercises. But SWEAT is much more of a guided experience, with multi-week programs designed by specific instructors. (There's also a SWEAT forum where lots of people talk about the different programs, and do challenges, and so forth.)
Furthermore, as much as I love the Fitbod app (read my full review here), I always felt like I wanted more leg exercises — to the extent that if I wanted to do a “leg day” I'd have to create my own program. While the program had an extensive menu of exercises, they were missing things like curtsy lunges, plie squats, and sumo squats that I thought were kind of basic. On the flip side, though, Fitbod was great about suggesting which weight to use and how many reps to do — and the algorithm came up with new muscles to exercise, so if I felt like doing more than 3 workouts a week I could easily do them. They're both great but they're very different apps, for sure.
SWEAT vs NROLFW: I've done the first few weeks of exercises from The New Rules of Lifting for Women SO MANY TIMES that I feel like I've got them memorized. Still, there are some exercises in the first few weeks that were too difficult for me (something about a jackknife with an exercise ball comes to mind), and ones that were too difficult to recreate at home. (No matter how many resistance bands I added to my door anchor I still never felt like a cable chop was working any muscles.)
(Other lifting programs I've tried, of which I still think NROLFW was the best for lifting at home: Strong, Strong Curves, Thinner Leaner Stronger, and newer versions of NROLFW. Back in the day, I purchased programs from Stumptuous, Girls Gone Strong, and Nerd Fitness Academy. For any book or guide, though, it's really hard to beat the gifs of the exercises in the apps.
When I was paying for Beachbody I tried a few of their weightlifting programs, and they were either beyond my skill level, too full of testosterone, or mind-numbingly dull.
{related: the best streaming workouts to do at home}
I'm still a big fan of the Body Pump classes at Les Mills on Demand, though, but felt (at least 4–6 months ago) that they were beyond my current fitness level — I could probably do them now, and might pick them up in the future if/when I get bored with the SWEAT workouts.
SWEAT is $19.99 per month, or $119 per year. They just started a bunch of 6-week challenges on Monday (and it's not too late to join in if you feel like it).
What are you doing for strength training these days, ladies? Do you have any favorite apps, streaming trainers, books or other programs?
(*Full disclosure on the affiliate stuff: We've included our standard affiliate disclosure note in this post because there are Amazon links to the books I'm mentioning, as well as to our standard closer with workwear sales. However, as of this writing we have no affiliation with the SWEAT App itself, nor have we received any copies for review or anything. I'm just a paying customer.)
Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
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Anon
Assertiveness (?) question – have there been times in your life when you have said, “You owe me an apology”? What happened? In my family of origin this would never have been said. I am trying to understand if I am overcorrecting from my put-up-or-shut-up youth.
Monday
An apology doesn’t mean much to me if I have to ask for it. The whole point is the other person genuinely feeling contrite. Exactly once, I asked a boyfriend to “take back” something hurtful he had said to me. It felt really degrading, and didn’t work anyway.
Holly Flax
^^^to me an apology doesn’t really carry weight if I have to ask for it.
Senior Attorney
Agree. And on the flip side, I had a client once who demanded apologies for every real and perceived slight and it just made him seem like a jerk.
Anon
Often when I feel like I deserve an apology, I end up feeling like I have to justify to the person why I feel that way. An apology that comes after that never really feels like an apology. So I just don’t.
Anon
I’d assert your right to walk away from bad people and not feel bad for doing it. You don’t even have to TELL them. You just have to do it.
No Face
Amen.
Senior Attorney
Coming back to say that the options aren’t limited to “ask for an apology” or “put up or shut up.” You can certainly convey information: “When you did X, it affected me in Y way and I didn’t like that. Please don’t do that again.” Or whatever.
Anonymous
+1. You don’t have to demand an apology to tell someone how their actions made you feel.
Anon
Omit the “please,” please :)
Actually, just walk away forever. If you are asking not to be ghosted/gaslit/smacked (or even flatly saying, “don’t do this again,” you are continuing a relationship that is problematic). I like saving the limited breath I have while on this earth for something likely to be productive.
Senior Attorney
This is a good point. My last marriage went from bad to worse when I started saying things like “please don’t yell at me.”
Anon
That seems a little extreme. Everyone occasionally says things that hurt other people, and that alone isn’t a reason to break up with them.
OP
I appreciate all the responses, but this is especially helpful. Thank you, SA.
Anon
I have a longtime friend who basically blatantly took advantage of my trust and our friendship and kept things from me that she knew would have turned my yes into a no. Once the withheld facts came to light it became very awkward between us. I knew, and she knew I knew.
Finally we went out for drinks and I brought it up. I plainly stated what had happened from my point of view. To her credit, she didn’t try to deny it. She apologized in a way that seemed heartfelt. We agreed to move on.
I wish I could say it didn’t damage the friendship but it did. Things continued to be awkward and we are less close now than we were before. She is still in my life, we still talk (and would have continued to hang out but for covid, I think) but I don’t think it will ever be what it was. I remind myself that I didn’t cause it by calling out the thing. She caused it by doing the thing.
Monday
She should have been the one to bring it up and apologize proactively (a second place option to not doing the thing in the first place). I see why you’re not as close anymore.
Anon
I think I would want to use some kind “I” statement. (“You owe…” is really different from from starting with “I…” somehow.)
Anonymous
I love the peloton app for strength training and stretching
Anon
+1
Bonnie Kate
+1
Betsy
I don’t have a stationary bike, but I do have a rowing machine, and I’ve been using the bike workouts on the peloton app recently and really liking it. I saw the suggestion online somewhere. Obviously I can’t follow the cadence recommendations, but I can increase the resistance on my machine and go faster or slower. I’ve been trying to convince myself to use the rower since covid started and following the Peloton classes is the first time I’ve actually enjoyed it and felt like I was getting a solid workout in.
Anon
I honestly toggle back from Peloton and Sweat. Sometimes I’ll throw in some extra ab routines from Peloton to supplement my Sweat workouts.
Anonymous
The music on the Peloton app drives me insane. I don’t want intense music for a simple core workout.
Airplane.
+1 Peloton over Sweat, Orange Theory, Nike Training club, Fitness blender, Yoga with Adrienne, Down Dog, Yoga Studio. I’ve tried all of the sbove and stuck it out the longest with Peloton. To me, the music is a feature not a bug, I want music even during a 10 minute ab class.
editrix
+++
Horse Crazy
I know this is a question for my doctor, and I’m going to ask her soon, but I’m curious if other women have had this problem. I’m 28. Four years ago, I got the Sklya IUD, which is supposed to last 3 years, but had it removed after about 18 months because I had on-and-off spotting the entire time. After that, I started taking the Ashlyna pill, which is a 12-week pill. I’ve been taking it for over 2 years now, and each cycle, at about week 7 or 8, I start to get spotting/get my period. It lasts until about week 11. I’m so frustrated with all of this spotting, and I’m looking for a new birth control method that will prevent this. I’ve heard the Mirena IUD might help – has anyone had similar experiences and found methods that stop the spotting? If it matters, I’m looking to start trying for kids in the next 3ish years.
Anon
Nuvaring works for me. I just keep it in for 4 weeks straight and then swap for a new one. I had some spotting at first, but it’s fine now.
Bonnie Kate
I had no periods on Mirena IUD after maybe 6 months. I switched after having it a few years to Paraguard (copper IUD) to eliminate hormones. I now have heavier periods than I did before when on other types of birth control – approximately 6-7 days. I assume that they are more or less similar to the periods I had before I was on birth control at all, but since I’ve been using some form since I was 17 I don’t remember.
Anonymous
My obgyn says spotting is mostly correlated with weight and most BCs are not designed for people over a certain size. If you’re spotting you likely need a BC with higher dosages
Bonnie Kate
FWIW, I was 115 lb and spotted constantly on the Depo shot.
Anon
I am overweight and have had a Mirena for eight years (two of them) – have never had spotting any spotting from the day I got the first one inserted.
Anon
My Skyla made me spot constantly, too. Plain old Tri-Cyclen (or Tri-Sprintec or whatever equivalent) is what works best for me.
Anon
Just an anecdote. One of my good friends who always had a painful, heavy flow couldn’t get to a non-spotting level on traditional birth control pills. She had to do her own research and insist her doctor take it seriously. It turned out she had endometriosis.
Betsy
+1 – the downside of using birth control for most of your young adult life is not knowing that there’s a problem until you go off of it. If trying for kids is in your near-ish term plans and it seems like there’s something unusual with your period there are benefits to doing some investigation.
NeglectedHeels
You can take your oral contraceptives 365 days a year to avoid spotting! It’s called continuous use. I was shocked to learn this 5 years ago but my doctor did a great job explaining it to me. It has been life changing to not get a period or have any problems with spotting. I usually take a break from the pill every 1-2 years for a week and have a little spotting at that time but my doctor tells me I don’t even need to do this if I don’t want to.
emily
I could never use the NuvaRing continuously because of spotting/breakthrough bleeding that otherwise didn’t happen if I stuck to the normal schedule. Then I switched to Skyla and didn’t have much spotting after the first couple of months but did get my (light) period about every 3 weeks for most of the 3 years I had it. When it was time for it to be replaced, I switched to Kyleena because that’s what my doctor’s office offered at the time (my understanding is that it’s like Skyla in every way except that it lasts for 5 years) and have had no spotting really and just get a very light “period” maybe once or twice a year. Who knows why!
Anon
Skyla and Mirena are the same product– one is just at a higher dose than the other. So I’m not sure why Mirena would work for you but Skyla would not. I had two Skylas and had no spotting. Spotting is very specific to the person, so unfortunately, you are probably just going to have to try things and see.
If you are TTC in three years, make sure you look at the recommended time to be off each individual BC before TTC. For example, you can conceive immediately after having an IUD removed, but some doctors recommend letting your cycle normalize for three months before TTC. I think with some pills and the depo shot, you are not able to TTC for a while after getting off them, so if you choose one of those options, make sure to look into that and include it in your timeline.
Monday
PSA for health care workers! Down Dog is offering us free, unlimited access to all of their apps until July. (I bet if it’s still a sh!tshow by then, they’ll extend it too.) The verification process is painless and they don’t even ask for a cc number.
Anon
Ugh. Spouse has a direct report who won’t wear a mask at work. They are negotiating having the report work in a different space with a door (OTOH — unless it has a direct door to the outside and its own bath, what is the point?).
[It goes without saying: they are an essential business and a small # of people have to be on site daily.]
lounging pear
Can he be fired? Private company, you can have your policies.
Diana Barry
Why can’t they fire this person?
Anonymous
This. Either you have a policy on this or you don’t.
Anonymous
Wow in my office you would be sent home and would have to use leave. Eventually you would run out of leave and not get paid.
Anonymous
Essential business or not, your husband should demand to work remotely until this person is removed from the office.
Anonymous
Sorry, assumed both spouse and offending employee were men because only men are this dumb.
Anonymous
LOL, so true.
Anonymous
Yeah, in some ways it’s like a company that doesn’t want fire arms on the premises. It’s not the choice of the employee.
Anonymous
Why is your spouse not putting this person on immediate notice?
anon
The company should have internal policy in this, which clearly states the consequences. My colleague was given a notice (3rd notice equals termination) for entering the office on a day he was not “booked for” (we had a period of time back in spring, when you could only enter the office on x days and only if you were registered in the system, to prevent having more than x people on the floor; he was the only one there that day). You didn’t write the reason based on which the coworker is refusing to wear a mask, but he seems like a careless jerk and not a person who values health and wellbeing of others. If the policy is in place, he company has to require. compliance and if he does not, terminate.
DC pandas
Hi All!
I’m definitely overthinking this- but wanted to ask for some feedback :)
I’m applying to a part-time grad school program in my field of work. I need a letter of recommendation, and would like to ask my boss to write it.
In the non-pandemic times, I would usually send them a quick email and pop into the office for further explanation. We’ve been virtual since March, so I’ll have to either schedule a zoom meeting or send an email with the request.
I find myself rewriting my email request over and over, because it feels like a big ask. Do any of you have recommendations on how to go about this?
Anon
What feels like a big ask – having boss write a letter, or letting your boss know you’re applying to a program? I don’t feel like a letter of recommendation should be a huge deal on its own.
Senior Attorney
I agree with it shouldn’t be a huge deal.
And can you just call them on the phone to talk about it?
DC pandas
OP here- the organization encourages us to pursue higher-ed and even provides reimbursement for work-related courses.
Boss is well aware and supportive of my long-term goals. I’m mostly struggling with requesting the letter itself.
Anon
I don’t think you need to say more to your boss than you did in your post here. Just the facts, ma’am.
Bonnie Kate
Agree. Sometimes I do this to myself – way overthink a simple call or email. Just do it right now and it will be done and you’ll feel way better!
Aunt Jamesina
I’ve written these letters before (my workplace also encourages higher ed and provides reimbursement). Even in non-pandemic times, I’ve been asked if I was willing to write letters of rec via email, it’s really NBD.
Elegant Giraffe
If it makes you feel better, I have a template for rec letters and usually just change the middle two paragraphs specific to the employee. Takes me 30 minutes max. And they’re fun to write.
BB
Late on this, but in case it helps you feel better, I have done this for direct reports before. And I feel honored that they ask me! Is it a bit of pain to take a few hours out of my weekend to write them – sure! But if I feel like the person is a high performer who should be developing their career, I am absolutely happy to do it!
Walnut
I write lots of letters of recommendations for direct reports and former direct reports. If you have a regular 1:1 sync, then ask in that. Otherwise, email or chat request is perfectly fine.
PNW
The little girl next door left a note on the table on our front porch that said “County Fair” with an arrow over to her house. So my husband grabbed some quarters and wandered over. He says there was a ring toss game and a bean bag game and he won a piece of candy :) I told him I loved him and he replied “I already ate the candy.”
Senior Attorney
Love this!
Anon
That is so cute!
Anonymous
This is adorable. He should go back over and win you a piece of candy.
Anonymous
Or a stuffed animal!
No Face
Everything about this story is wonderful.
Anonymous
Oh my gosh!! Cutest thing ever! ?
Curious
I love this
Ses
+1
Anon
2% of our state has gotten the COVID shot — hooray! The first wave was health care workers. The next one includes old people (75+).
Is there a way to see state or county-wide how many people have had it? I am thinking a LOT of people are in that bucket now. I see #s nationwide but not broken out more (and to include living people who survived, unfortunately, not all did).
Shot + already-had-COVID people at some point will be a huge portion of people (like all but antivaxers and small children too young to get it), but it would be nice to see what the #s are.
Bonnie Kate
I was also curious about this! Looks like NYTimes has something – https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/us/covid-19-vaccine-doses.html
Anon
What about the COVID-recovered? If + cases were a fraction of all cases and we only know of deaths, wouldn’t there be a much larger # out there who are protected (even if incompletely protected)? [And people who might not rush to get a shot, but let others have a spot in line.]
I keep giving blood even though I was a regular donor before hoping in vain for the antibody test to be +. I was exposed once but quarantined without having any symptoms ever develop and am hoping to get some antibodies, but guessing that will be a no. [I will be last in line for shots, but don’t really care as long as the people in line before me actually get their shots. I’m OK waiting but want normal to come back or be on the horizon.]
LaurenB
Thing is — are states like ND / SD looking good not because they are “good” but because with small populations, the % of the pop who are essential healthcare workers is high? I feel like there needs to be some adjustment to this which is like “% of those in [target population] in this state who have been vaxxed.”
Walnut
I thought this article from West Virginia was particularly insightful. They’re using the National Guard and local pharmacies to manage their distribution, which seems to be working well for them to get shots in arms.
https://www.cnbc.com/2021/01/11/how-west-virginia-became-a-top-state-for-covid-vaccine-administration-gov-jim-justice.html
PNWJ
Looking at the NYT and Bloomberg articles it looks like some states are just doing a better job of getting the doses out there. The distribution is roughly equal to population percentage (states with more people got more doses) but some states are just doing a better job of getting those doses off the shelf and into people’s arms.
Ribena
The number of vaccine doses given here in Scotland is now more than the total number of cases here (with positive tests) since the start of the pandemic! I know it’s an imperfect measure but it feels like a milestone to me here!
Walnut
This is my current favorite tracker: https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/covid-vaccine-tracker-global-distribution/?srnd=premium
Accountant in person?
Is there any benefit to having an accountant whose office I can easily visit in person? Or is that a totally pointless consideration, especially after 2020? Choosing a new accountant and got a rec for one that’s ~15 miles in the burbs outside of the city I live in. I think it’s fine because all my forms are electronic anyway (scanned and whatnot), and I can just get on the phone for any questions.
PNW
I found a new accountant last year literally a week before Covid hit. I had an appointment to go to their office and it didn’t seem unusual to want to do that, but we switched to doing everything online and it was fine. I still haven’t met him in person and doubt at this point that I will.
pnw anon
No real benefit.
Senior Attorney
Only if you’re like me and you drop off tax stuff at the VERY VERY VERY last minute.
Senior Attorney
Except now that’s all online, so… no.
anon
No real benefit. I’ve had the same accountant for 10 years, and I’ve never met with him in person to discuss my tax return. I’ve met him in person before, but at social or professional events, not to discuss my tax return.
Vicky Austin
I’m an accountant (although not a CPA) and I say no, there’s really nothing anyone can’t do for you from their own computer.
Jules
I have been using the same CPA to do my taxes for 15-20 years and have never been inside his office or even met him! Before the days of emailing everything, my then H would drop off our documents becuase he worked near the accountant’s office, but now I just do it all electronically. The accountant and I talk on the phone once or twice a year. that’s it.
LaurenB
We sold a business this year and had to be on site at our accountant’s for paperwork that could not be completed online. But it was pandemic friendly, masked, distant, very short time spent in conference room. Generally speaking, though, no — all stuff can be done remotely IMO, or worst case mail papers.
Sunshine
I have used the same person for more than a decade, during which time I’ve lived in four different states. It has not mattered at all.
Still Quarantined - An Update
In case anyone is curious. I’m the poster who found out I was covid-exposed right before the insurrection and was dealing with stress. I got tested the day I found out (4 days after exposure) and the result came back negative. I celebrated by walking my garbage 5 feet down the hall to the chute — double masked, and used a paper towel to open all doors. My anxiety improved a ton after the negative test result. Otherwise, I still stayed in my apartment and just this afternoon left to go get my second test (10 days after exposure). Friday will be a full 14 day quarantine, and hopefully I’ll have a negative second test by then and I’ll officially be done — looking forward to some long walks outside this weekend! I don’t have any symptoms, and my friend who inadvertently exposed me still doesn’t either.
Anonymous
Thanks for the update and I’m glad it was negative. Really appreciate that you are doing the right thing and staying in quarantine.
Anon
Quick question. My really good friend finds out today if her IVF worked. When I was going through it (not successful) I hated when people checked in and asked my results. I feel weird though not acknowledging the day at all, particularly as we texted about a funny ad I received. Part of me wants to just say “thinking of you today” but I don’t want that to sound like code for “tell me the results.” Even if I say, no need to respond just wanted to say I’m thinking of you …. I don’t know.
There were times I just wanted everyone to leave me alone. There were times I wanted to text everyone that knew and rip the bandaid off and say it didn’t work.
But maybe hers did work and she might not want to tell people that either. So…. check in at all or do nothing?
Aunt Jamesina
I’m going through IVF right now and I think pressure-free check in texts are nice! It’s nice to know that my procedures are on my friends’ radar even if they don’t fully understand what I’m going through. Sometimes I need someone to vent to, other times I don’t, but I think as long as it doesn’t have any sort of wording that could be construed as R U PREGNANT YET??? is a good gesture. Something like “thinking of you” would be appreciated by most people, I think– it’s what I would do for any other major medical procedure for a friend.
Aunt Jamesina
I think, too, that you have the benefit of having been there. I have to grit my teeth at some of the things well-intentioned people say sometimes, but people who have been through infertility treatment get it and I feel more comfortable talking over my complicated feelings with them than with those who haven’t.
Anon
“Just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you today! No need to respond to this text”
Anon
I like this and am sending it. Thanks everyone!
anon
I have in the past sent text to friends who had big events like this. I simply tell them I am thinking about them, hoping the best for them, and that they mean a lot to me. I will even say in the text no need to respond, I know you are busy. If they respond, great! We can celebrate or curse and cry together. I would say err on the side of checking in with your friend and letting her know you support her.