2013, 2019, 2024: Where Did You Think You’d Be By Now? Where Do You Want to Be in Five Years?
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A little more than 5 years ago, we had a post about career plans where basically we asked everyone to look into their crystal balls and tell us where they wanted to be five years from that date (November 2013) — and I promised to revisit the post in 5 years and give everyone the option to update us. (Today I'll be emailing everyone who originally gave me their email address and permission to email them, asking them to come back and comment as well!)
If you commented on the original post — please copy and paste your original comment into this thread — and then update it. If you didn't comment on the original post, please comment below — have the past five years gone according to plan? (If not, what derailed you or propelled you onto a different path?) Where do you want to be in the next five years (2024)? Please leave your email address and I'll contact you if/when we do this in 2024!
Here was the original ask, inspired by a New York Times documentary that looked up women originally profiled in a 2001 article, back when they were all junior associates at a BigLaw firm. The more recent article/documentary looked up several of the women profiled and found that many had not accomplished their original goals, many pondering whether the gender gap had an impact on them. The thrust of the article was that women were underestimating the extent to which gender issues would affect their careers. Here was my ask of the readers, back in 2013:
I’m going to ask you guys to scroll forward in YOUR Palm Pilots* (tee hee) and tell me: where do you want/think you’ll be in five years — and in ten years? What do you think the major challenges are that you’ll encounter? How much do you think gender issues will play into your success or failure? I’d love to ask that everyone comment with an email address in the address field — I’ll keep your emails private but I’d love to be able to come back to this post in five years (or ten years, God willing) and email a few of you to see where you are, how it shook out. (This is the ambitious part!) (Of course all email addresses will be held in confidence, in keeping with The Corporette® Privacy Policy.)
I can't wait to hear what people say (and hear how everyone's 5-year plan went, and how their 10-year plan is going)…
For my own $.02, this was my answer back in 2013 for my own five-year career plan:
I’m so far off the path right now that this doesn’t seem even fair to myself for me to say. In five years, I hope I’ll still be running this site as my profession, of course; if not I have confidence that one of my many Plan Bs will work out. I’m not sure it’s fair to call them “gender issues,” but I suppose that’s what they are — I struggle daily with life/work balance, needing to devote more time to my business, wanting to devote more time (and quality, high energy time at that) to my family — and I struggle with finding time to be the “cruise director” to our lives (e.g., planning educational, age-appropriate weekend outings and vacations, managing our financial investments as well as clothing/food purchases, making family photo albums, etc, etc). I outsource/assign what I can to my husband, VA, or my mother (my Christmas list this year is a series of thinly veiled research projects!) but I think this “Cruise Director” Syndrome is a uniquely female goal — the goal to manage everything for your family on TOP of killing it in business.
Ooof. Yeah. So: not much has changed with my struggles — I still have not figured out life/work balance, as I've written about a ton over at CorporetteMoms, including things like why I'm frustrated that family dinner time bumps up against my naturally productive period of the day, why I aggressively delegate or “nope” certain motherhood tasks entirely, and in general all the ways I try to share parenting duties with my spouse.
In terms of unforeseen challenges, I definitely did underestimate the effect of motherhood, and we've had some family issues come up over the past five years that were totally unanticipated, and without getting into private matters, I will say that the amount of energy, brain power, research, worry, and more has been a huge drain for me, to the detriment of the business; I've definitely felt for long periods like I'm treading water and trying not to drown in the middle of a huge ocean.
That said, 2017 and 2018 were our two highest years ever for most blog stats that I track (money, traffic), so I am still hopeful that I'll be running this blog in another five years or that the skills I've learned while building the blog will have useful to some other new endeavor.
Readers, how about you — if you had answered the original question in 2013, where did you THINK you'd be by now? What got in your way or propelled you further? Looking forward to 2024, where do you want to be in terms of career, personal life, and more? What do you think are realistic five-year career goals, and what do you think are stretch goals?
Stock photo via Shutterstock / Kunal Mehta.
* Riiiiight. Palm Pilots were an early handheld device that helped you organize notes, phone numbers, to-do lists, and more. They eventually morphed into phones. I was a little bit obsessed with them as the keeper of all my favorite lists.
ORIGINAL:
My goals:
I’m 25, a government analyst, about to move in with my girlfriend of two years. I have around 35k of student loans and car loan. No real gender issues so far in my career. In five years, I hope I’m two grades higher (or three, let’s aim high here) and not living in DC anymore. I’d like to be in a new department of my federal agency, probably, or in a new agency. I’d like a good manager and a substantial amount of leave saved. Personally, I’d like to be happily coupled with my girlfriend (married or not; I’d like to be on the forever train) and not living in a crappy apartment. I’d love a pet by then, but it’s not very important to me. I fully intend to be debt-free.
In ten years, I hope to be purchasing a house (if I’m settled in an area), maxing out my TSP (government 401k), on the forever train and possibly married to my current girlfriend. Professionally, I’d like to be a director-level position in the government. If I decide/realize I don’t want to do management/leadership, I’d like to be a GS-15 somewhere (dream big, right?).
UPDATE:
I am three grades higher (but only permanent status at two grades higher), living just outside DC (which the goal was farther away, oh well). Different department, same agency! A good manager, at least direct manager. I have a bunch of leave saved. Married to my then-gf, and our (owned!) condo is pretty great. I’ve had our cat since like January 2014. I’m not debt-free because I’m not overpaying my student loans but I’m like 100% okay with that. I only have like $10k left.
How crazy how close it was!! I’m pretty pleased with it. I don’t want to buy a house five years from now (maybe in like 15 years?) I would like to be a director or GS-15, and it feels very doable. I will be debt free by then (except the condo of course). I’d like to be done having kids (I am TTC right now) in five years, whether that’s two kids like we want right now or one and done. Oh and I want another cat by then unless it’s clear our current cat can’t deal with that.
I was reading back in 2013 but had gotten really busy at my job that fall so wasn’t posting much.
If I had posted on that thread, I would have said I was looking forward to a time when my son (then 7) was more independent; that within 5 years we would buy a new house (had been in our then-house at that point for 12 years and I was sick of it), would continue growing at my job that I had been at less than a year, and continue to be married to my awesome husband. I also would have said my goal in 5 years would be to get a job in my field at Big Company in my city, which is basically the pinnacle of the profession in my area.
Now:
– Son is definitely more self-sufficient and I find myself missing his little-kid days sometimes. But he has grown into an awesome person with a lot to offer the world. I can’t wait to see what happens next.
– House – we just moved this past fall and sold the old house. It was waaaay past time to move. As sick of the house as I was in 2013, I was like exponentially more sick of it by the time we moved. I wouldn’t say this house is my dream house (that would be a cabin in the woods in the middle of nowhere) but it’s really nice and I love our neighborhood. I’m happy.
– Still married and still happy despite living through some serious craziness in the last couple of years (buying house, selling house, three job changes between us, major family illnesses, etc. etc.)
– I stayed at the job I was at in 2013 for 3 more years. I ended up leaving to take that “dream job” at Big Company and…I hate it. It’s nothing like I thought it would be. I thought I’d be here the rest of my career but almost 2 1/2 years in I am already putting my exit strategy together. It’s been a big lesson to me in “be careful what you wish for.” The good news is, it looks great on my resume and it doesn’t look like I’ll have much trouble getting another job. But oof, this has been a rough ride. I’ll end up taking a big pay cut to go somewhere else and be happy to do it.
2013 me: Junior associate in Big Law (feel okay about it, but don’t love it), just got married, just bought a house. In five years hoping to be on pathway to partnership at current firm, with kids, and maybe in the same city, maybe somewhere new. Focusing free time on physical training/athletics and building new friendships. Trying to pay down student loans and build up savings.
2019 me: Still junior associate in Big Law. Took a huge swerve and switched practice areas and firms, after being unhappy at first firm (lack of mentorship/work opportunities coupled with pervasive mysogyny/disparate treatment of new mothers). Absolutely love new job, boss, and practice area. Doubling down on pro bono/community involvement. Feeling strong and confident. Still married, now with a toddler and rainbow baby. Finally starting to like the city I’m in. Unbelievably out of shape and not much time for friends except for playdates. One vacation per year with family, all within US. Student loans payed off!
2024 me: In five years I’d like to (1) be a partner at my current firm and an expert in my field; (2) be in-house and an expert in my field; or (3) take another major swerve and focus on social justice/non-profit work. I’d like to be a mentor and advocate for other working moms. Possibly more children. In better shape. Cleaner/more organized house (LOL). More financial investments. Possibly some international travel with the family. Hoping to still feel happy and grounded, and getting to spend as much time with my kids as possible, while still growing my career. Kiddos will be in school (rather than daycare) and hoping it goes smoothly.
I LOVE this thread. I didn’t comment five years ago, but I wish I had!
2013- I was a 30-year old second year biglaw associate in DC, who desperately hated being a biglaw associate. I was in the throes of a full-fledged anxiety and eating disorder. And, while seriously skinnier than I’d ever been in my life (or probably will be again) – I was also the saddest I’d ever been. I lived by myself in a basement apartment and rarely had time to see my friends, but had no trouble paying my bills. I was dating – but couldn’t imagine ever finding a long-term relationship that worked.
2018(19)- At 35, I feel like my entire world has changed for the better. Professionally, I left biglaw in October of 2013 for a (very) small/boutique practice. While that environment has its disadvantages (pay cut and firm financial stability being two of them), I learned a tremendous amount, built my skills in ways I never could in big law, and met a ton of wonderful people. That tiny firm was acquired by a mid-sized national firm at the beginning of 2018 – I stayed a year and recently became a lawyer for the federal government in my regulatory practice area. I miss my colleagues, but I LOVE not billing time – and being home more.
Immediately after quitting big law, I got a dog (because it struck me as something that “normal people” did)….a female retired racing greyhound who is one of the great loves of my life. I met the other one, my now-husband, in late 2015. (Thanks OK Cupid!) We got engaged in summer of 2017 and married in January 2018. He’s brilliant. And funny. And kind (kids and babies love him). And a grownup. Shortly after getting married, we bought a house in a suburb near DC. (We also got a second greyhound, who is NOT one of the loves of my life yet – but he’s wearing me down.) We’d like to start a family, but may be starting down the infertility road. My eating disorder swung towards the binging side of the spectrum, so significant (but healthy) weight loss is on my agenda. We spend a lot of time with his family (they are local) and our friends. I have definitely picked up some of the household slack since my job involves fewer hours than it once did – and he took a new job late last year that requires far more hours than before. Life is good. The goal for the next year or so is a healthy lifestyle and babies.
In 2013, I was just about to graduate college and started law school in the fall. I wasn’t entirely sure what I wanted to do with my degree- I was certain I wanted to do public interest work, maybe child advocacy, maybe public defender, maybe health law? But I didn’t think AT ALL I would be in the niche I’m in now. I didn’t even know it existed. But right about now 5 years ago I got an internship for my 1L summer at the local legal aid organization in this niche, fell in love, and never looked back.
Today I’m almost 3 years out of law school. I’m still at the same org as my 1L internship. There have been SERIOUS ups and downs since I started working as an attorney but I’m finally mostly content with my work and my professional life now that I’ve figured out what I like and what I can’t stand doing.
Personally, I have a serious chronic illness, and my health has gone from stable to scary to stable to declining and then, a year ago, I got onto a trial for a new drug and it skyrocketed into levels of health I haven’t seen since 2012. It’s a miracle and I’m so much less stressed on day to day because I don’t have the constant fear of a slow and painful decline. Also, I got a dog.
In 5 years, not sure where I want to be professionally. I’d like to maybe do some policy or government work. I can’t exactly imagine staying where I am, even though I’m relatively okay there for now. I’d really love to be able to work for my old boss again but we’ll see what life brings.
Personally, I’d like to find someone to be with, maybe? Not sure. But I really, really would just like to be able to say that the meds I’m on are still working and that I’m healthy and maybe even that a particular test result is better than average. I’d like to be healthy, with my mental health stable. And I’d like to be in the same apartment I am now since I love it. :)
I’m so late to this post, but I think it could be fun to come back in 2024.
2013: I was reading and commenting here, although I’m not sure I had adopted this name at the time. I was a first-year associate in a Biglaw firm, doing transactional work. I wasn’t especially good at it, but I was happy to be at that firm and was trying to make the best of it. I was perpetually single and perpetually worried about it (and 29 years old).
2019: I transitioned to litigation at that same Biglaw firm in 2014 and was told I wouldn’t make partner and would need to move on in mid-2017. I started a new position at a litigation boutique doing a similar type of work in 2018. Also in 2018, I checked some travel goals off my bucket list, and I met a great guy! We are now going on seven months together.
2024: Hope to be with that same guy (and married to him), and I also hope to be a mother. I’m uncertain about whether I will want to be at the same law firm in 5 years – I am almost certain I don’t want to be an associate there in 5 years. Time will tell. My life looks different (and better!) in many ways than I had pictured it even two years ago!
I wasn’t a reader in 2013 (had just graduated from college). Last year I graduated from law school, and now I’m working as an attorney in state government. Hopefully by 2024 I’ll be happily coupled/settled down and still working in government or for a nonprofit.
Hey all! It seems like most of the law folks underestimated the role gender played in their careers. As a 3L about to graduate and enter practice, do y’all have any recommendations? I’ll be working at a mid-level firm in a pretty rural area and I’m cautiously hopeful, but any advice would be much appreciated!
2013 me:
> In five years, I hope to be married and considering kids with my current long-time partner. I hope to be speaking at international conferences and making a real name for myself within the IT industry.
> In ten years? I’d love to be a stay at home mom and go freelance. But I’d also like to start a yarn shop. I don’t have those long term plans yet, as I recently reached my goal of moving to Sweden – it’s a bit like “what do I do now?”I will do what makes me happy – the hardest part of that will be figuring out what makes me happy.
2019 me:
Well. I succeeded in moving towards what made me happy, by stepping out of the corporate career ladder and moving back to open source. I love the open source world, and I love (most parts of) my job working to support customers running their own small businesses. I adore working remotely and not having to dress up for customers. It’s been an interesting journey, none of which I saw coming five years ago. Not married, but still with the same person and mostly at peace with that. No kids (yet?), as there’s a whole rabbit hole of a story there.
2024 me:
Probably still in Sweden, maybe in a bigger apartment, maybe a kid. Probably still in open source, either with the same company, my own company or working for support for a larger company. I’ve learned that I can’t just do the 9-5 job and leave it – I need to leave things better than when I started and am constantly looking for ways to do so. Maybe I’ll eventually move into a manager position, maybe I’ll stay as an individual contributor.
For someone who has always been about setting goals, I’m pretty uninspired right now. I’m betting that’s a season, and that I’ll have a plan in 2024.
Looking back from 2013, “where did you THINK you’d be by now?”
I thought I would be married.
“What got in your way or propelled you further?”
I didn’t meet anyone and enjoyed my work and health care studies, so I pursued an MBA, and I am now completing my PhD. I currently work clinically and at a research institution as I complete my studies.
“Looking forward to 2024, where do you want to be in terms of career, personal life, and more?”
I will be 33. I would like to be married. I would like to have a loving relationship with a dependable and financially stable husband. I would like to be trying for a baby. I would like to be working in a university as a tenure track assistant professor. I would like to be teaching courses that I enjoy and working on research projects that interest or advantage me. I would like to have time to go to church and to have a good faith community. I would like to have time to exercise, and be going to the gym regularly, at the very minimum once a week.
“What do you think are realistic five-year career goals, and what do you think are stretch goals?”
My career goals seem very realistic, as largely all my professional goals have been achievable or even accomplished, which is a huge blessing. Personal goals feel like chasing a unicorn. It has been a challenge for me to find a promising relationship. In my early 20s, I wanted commitment and my male peers wanted one night stands. In my late 20s, I still want commitment, and my male peers are either intimidated by my professional life, or married. No clue how my prospects will improve in my 30s, but at least I’ll have a fulfilling career.
(Wo)Man! This post helped me so much. I am a struggling 31 year-old first time mum. I got pregnant unexpectedly at 28 and I was just on the verge of starting my career. I had to drop everything and just be a mum and do shitty jobs to make ends meet. While having a daughter has brought so much colour, sparkle and meaning to my life, I do feel like one “could have been” life is slipping further and further from my reach. It is a really tough crossroads for so many women, and I think that we all know that no matter how wonderful your partner may be, motherhood will always unfairly be more than half the parenting responsibility and subsequent sacrifice. However beautiful being a mother is, it is still, for me anyway, a sacrifice and one I am still coming to terms with. Reading your resolutions was inspiring – we can do it ALL, it will just be harder! xxx