Coffee Break – Bamboo Small Pave Hoop Earrings

66 Comments

1. Yay, Coffee Break! NYC ladies, where do y’all shop for used clothes? Thrift shops? Consignment stores? Where are these places? Any favorites in Manhattan, Queens, Brooklyn, Long Island?

   1. Housing Works in Manhattan is great (haven’t used any others). And the money goes to a great cause. Check out their site, and the stores definitely vary by neighborhood, so the East Village outlet has a very different feel than the new one on the UWS.

      1. Love Housing Works. The E 17th street location is great. Also E 77 and the one on the UWS. It’s hit or miss (like all such ventures) but it can be great, esp. if you stumble in on one of the “all skirts $5” or “everything 50% off” days. My favorite finds have included brand new or almost new items such as: JCrew long sleeve suiting dress, tags on, for $25, a like-new Elie Tahari (not “Tahari” Tahari) tweed skirt for $8, and a gorgeous Vivienne Tam party dress with pockets for $20. If you have one near you, pass by from time to time and if it looks promissing, go in. I have also gotten some great household items there, including furniture.

         There are also lots of great consignment stores on the Upper East Side (many on E 83rd) st., but in my limited experience those are more for serious designer items and, personally, I find them less helpful as I have no desire to spend, e.g., $600 on a tweed channel suit.

         1. Big thifter here. There’s a great consignment shop across the street from Lohmann’s (7th Ave, around 17th St). In Brooklyn, I like Beacon’s Closet (Williamsburgh) and Housing Works (Park Slope). Just bought a new Calvin Klein dress (original tags) for $30 and a silk White House Black Market one for $15, also brand new.

2. Any opinions on J Crew’s Mona pumps? I want to get the “graphite tortoise” ones but I’m wondering if they’re worth the price. And any tips as to sizing? Thanks!

   1. I bought a pair, but I could not walk in them. I tried, but the leather is so stiff and they’re so narrow (and I’ve pretty average feet and am not overly fussy about not-so comfortable shoes) so I would definitely try them on in the store before you buy them.

      1. That is what I was worried about. I have a pair of J Crew pumps from a few years ago and they leather is very stiff & uncomfortable.

         1. if you’re just looking for black pumps. NM has kate spade ones (Karolina) for $134 now: http://tinyurl.com/3hl2rnq

            1. Great find on a classic shoe.

3. I want these earrings with my entire heart and soul…but not for $650. Anyone seen any knock-offs?

   1. THIS. 100%.

   2. I don’t endorse knockoffs, but FWIW, silver bamboo hoops are huge right now, and you can find lots of affordable, handmade versions on Etsy.

      You could always bedazzle a pair with rhinestones

4. Gorgeous earrings! A girl can dream…

   In-house ladies: I need interview help. I have an out-of-the-blue interview tomorrow for an in-house position that seems too good to be true. I had a very casual phone interview already and the real interview tomorrow is with just two people and will probably be less than an hour. I was recommended by an ex-partner at my firm and he pretty much convinced them they should hire me before they even saw my resume (I owe him an entire case of wine!).

   Beyond the obvious questions, I would love to hear from any in-house attorneys with questions you wished you had asked before starting your current job. I haven’t had to interview in 7 years, so I’m a bit rusty. Thanks!

5. Hmmmm, I’m reading this super long and fascinating article about how marriage is changing and I’m curious as to everyone’s thoughts on it http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2011/11/all-the-single-ladies/8654/?single_page=true. I don’t know what to think but it’s very well-written and brings up many interesting points.

   1. I’ve only read the beginning of it, but it looks really interesting. Just long.

      My initial thoughts – I never thought ALLAN was the type to FASTIDIOUSLY fold his shirts.

      1. Every time I read “Ellen” or “Allen”, I could not control the smile on my face.

   2. I agree that it was very long and I just skimmed, but I’m in my mid-30s and don’t think marriage (in the traditional sense) is for me. Even if I do decide to get married at some point, I don’t think I will want a standard marriage. I think that is definitely becoming more common.

      1. Out of curiosity, what do you consider a “standard marriage”?

   3. I read most but not all of it. What is her point/thesis? At times she seems to regret not getting married when she had more opportunities and at others she seems to defend her decisions. It’s a bit confusing.

   4. (Copied from a friend’s Tumblr):

      * I will take commentary like this seriously when it asks why MEN aren’t getting married in greater numbers. And no, articles about black men don’t count. (I also don’t buy “But they’re getting the milk for free, you hoors!” as an explanation.)

      * I found some of the historical information cited to be interesting, but most of it was drowned out by sentences like “From 1970 (seven years after the Equal Pay Act was passed) to 2007, women’s earnings grew by 44 percent, compared with 6 percent for men. In 2008, women still earned just 77 cents to the male dollar—but that figure doesn’t account for the difference in hours worked, or the fact that women tend to choose lower-paying fields like nursing or education,”and “Of course, plenty of women are perfectly happy with casual, no-strings sex, but they are generally considered to be in the minority.”

      * I am getting thoroughly sick of Atlantic articles that attempt to reinforce seriously retro gender norms while pretending to critique said gender norms.

      1. Word. All of this.

      2. Ha, ur friend is awesome.

   5. Thanks for posting, Ru. Very interesting article. You weren’t kidding about it being long. Like you, I am not sure what to think though. I guess I am in a similar boat to the author and a bit ambivalent. I am mid-30’s and single. In my view, marriage is a fine institution, but it is far from essential…and I am lucky to be in a position where that is the case. At the same time, I do get tired of the questions I get about constantly being single, being too picky, etc. It is pretty annoying.

   6. I read it. It feels like the author is “wallowing in complexity” to borrow a phrase from College Writing. That’s fine with me because she provides some food for thought.

      I don’t know, some of her experiences mirror mine but I think she gives guys short shrift. Most guys I know are great, caring and do want to get married/have kids. They are facing the same issues I am in finding “the one”. I don’t think any of my single friends are being “too picky”. An ex once told me, “we’re all just looking for someone whose psychosis matches our own.”

      In the meantime, I try to follow Dan Savage’s advice to teenage boys: join a gym, read books (stay informed), get out of the house to do stuff, and take care of myself. The guys I want to date all do this too. It’s the guys who don’t do this stuff and then expect me to be attracted to them that I avoid.

   7. “Wallowing in Complexity.” I like that. I felt like this piece had a lot of research and ideas floating around, but no real thesis.

      In general, I feel like the “to marry or not to marry” thing is way over-thought. This piece is just a good example. You don’t need to delve into human history, archaic laws, census statistics, extensive anecdotal stories, or politics. It’s a personal decision. You just have to be comfortable with your own.

      Just be grateful that you live in a society where you have options and leave it at that.

      1. To be clear, I mean the larger “you”, not the OP or commenters. I really wish English had the French “on” pronoun.

         1. Isn’t that the (seemingly) archaic pronoun “one?”

6. My husband and I have made a bet but we can’t decide what the winner should get! Any ideas?

   FYI, we love to cook together, so nothing where the losers has to cook meals, etc. We also share finances, so loser buys winner a fancy dinner doesn’t seem quite right either. I feel very lame that I can’t think of anything!

   The only thing I can think of is where Toby had to say, “and I work at the White House” every time he said his name for a day, but that won’t really work either.

   1. No suggestions, but +10 for the West Wing reference. That just made my afternoon!

   2. 30 minute massage? Dish duty for X number of days?

   3. Some ideas off the top of my head: the loser does the winner’s least favorite chore for a week, sets their Facebook profile photo to something of the winner’s choosing, lets the winner rearrange the Netflix queue, or donates money to the winner’s favorite cause.

      1. OMG. Rearranging the Netflix queue. This is going to be my standard bet/payback reward from now on.

      2. Love the rearranging the Netflix queue. Now I just need a bet to win so we can stop getting anime in the mail!

   4. Kudos for the West Wing reference :) It’s not too exciting, but my favorite bet with my SO is for a long shoulder rub.

   5. How about a day spent doing something that the other person loves. For example, he wins…he gets to pick the days’ activities…ball game followed by steak dinner? You win, trip to the day spa followed by shopping trip?

      1. This. My hubs and I do a big March Madness bet every year. I won this year and hubs had to come to a spin class with me. I think if I win this year I’m going to make it Zumba!

   6. I giggle-snorted at the WW reference. Thanks :)

      I would definitely pick the top five on the Netflix queue!
      I like picking the day’s activities, too. It’s a fun way to lose a bet.
      Concede defeat on facebook?
      Are you currently debating any wall colors, new car make and model, vacation locations, or baby names? Winner decides.

      1. Ha! Those are such serious things to win – I’m not sure I trust myself enough to pick my child’s name when I’m wallowing in my victory. I get rather dance-in-the-endzone-ish. :)

         1. By the way, I really like all of the suggestions! I need to start betting him more so I can use them.

         2. My fiancé typically bet that the loser has to perform the winner’s preferred sexual act. Everyone wins!

            1. “my fiancé and I”

7. Is “squee” part of that professional image we’re all shooting for? I think, if you wouldn’t do it out loud, don’t do it in writing (for “squee,” that is, haven’t thought out a general principle here).

   1. I like to think of Corporette as more like a friendly lunch with some ladies you met through work, and like and respect, rather than the stiffest professional environment you ever find yourself in. “Squee” is allowed, in my book. As is the occasional typo. And a near-daily inside joke referring to Ellen.

   2. You know this is a blog, right?

   3. For real? This isn’t much different than “swoon” or other similar expressions that often appear on here as well. Poor Kat for making the occassional expression of joy/excitement/passion at a pretty accessory while discussing its work appropriateness. I was going to go all snark-fest but am, instead, just going to go get my tired self another caffinated beverage.

   4. Totally disagree. This is a fun place to visit, and fun words are allowed. If I wanted to read a legal brief, or something written in the same manner, I would go ahead and do that…

   5. My doctor says “squee” out loud, and I love and respect the hell out of her. So I vote that the word is perfectly appropriate for this blog.

      1. My mom always said it (squealed it) when she was excited about something, and so my sister and I have said it since we were little. I just think of it as the verbal expression of the pit-of-the-stomach, semi-irrational excitement about something. Many times it has been about finding the perfect item while shopping… so yes. Totally appropriate for Corporette. :) (Also, I love the idea of my doctor saying “squee” as well. It’s a “good news” type word!)

   6. I’m not shooting for a professional image on this blog.

      Squee!!!

   7. I put it in the same catagory as Nordie’s, Bloomie’s, OMG. We’re all professional in our work environment but surrounded by friends (which is how I like to think of corporette), we can let loose a bit.

8. Regular poster. I just got my lease renewal info from my landlord. Rent is going up 17%. I want to cry. I’ve moved every.single.year since law school to get away from these crazy rent increases, moving into progressively less nice apartments. In my current one, I can only use my clothes steamer in the kitchen because it trips the circuit in any other room due to outdated electrical. It makes me so, so sad that despite the fact that I work in a big firm and make what is considered to be an excellent salary, bring my lunch, and am pretty careful with my money, I still cannot afford to live in a very nice apartment (you know, where I can run two appliances at the same time) while continuing to save responsibly for my emergency fund and my 401k. And buying a condo is completely impossible given the prices around here. FML.

   1. I’m so sorry. That really sucks. I can’t imagine a 17% increase in rent!! It makes you wonder how everyone else is affording those nice apartments/buying nice new houses (and new cars and everything else) – I’ve come to the conclusion that a lot of people are just not as focused on being responsible about savings and the retirement fund. Have you checked the rental market lately? Have the prices really gone up that much?

   2. 17%! Most of my friends are seeing 20%-25% increases in Silicon Valley.

      I did the “move from apt to apt every year” too due to rising rents until I paid off the bulk of my student loans. Then I put that money towards saving for a down payment (it took about 2 years) and bought a very modest house. It really was to just escape rising rents!

      I know it’s tough but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Have you thought about getting a roommate for now?

   3. I’m sorry – but really, that is why people buy. Have you looked into TIC or some other slightly less expensive form of homebuying? I seriously doubt prices are going to get much better than they are now.

      1. PS I know this goes against the standard advice, but if you borrow your downpayment from your 401K, you are really just betting that the real estate market will outperform the stock market over the repayment period. I think that’s a pretty good bet right now.

   4. Two appliances at the same time? Don’t you think your expectations are a little ambitious?? I think you need to accept that you can only use the toaster if your TV isn’t on, or the microwave only if you’re not also using a blender.
      *sarcasm*

      I had an apartment in my third year of undergrad that I shared with three girls. If we each plugged in our blowdryers or straightening irons the entire apartment went dark. Or two blowdryers and a toaster. Or the microwave and one blow dryer. And it had those older fuses, where the bulb had to be replaced. Yeah. That was not irritating at all, especially when getting ready for class in the mornings.

      I hope you can work something out!

   5. Consider writing the LL and asking for a decrease (and obviously not too aggressive in tone, laying out the reasons you’re a great tenant and it’s in his/her interest that you stay, that you want to stay, etc.). Despite rent increases being pretty normal in my metro area, a couple of my friends did this with success. Can’t hurt, right?

      1. I think you have to know your area. In my town, most complexes are larger and run by totally inflexible management companies that go out of their way not to help anyone. Unfortunately that just results in everyone moving around a lot and apartments staying vacant for several months between tenants. I looked at one complex in June and was given a very reasonable price. In August they started repainting and the prices had gone up almost 25% as a result. I don’t think the apartments in question had any new fixtures or upgrades.

   6. Have you considered getting a roommate? I know that it could be hard, going from on-your-own to having someone else there, but it might be a way for you to afford living someplace where you can have the comfort you require and still be able to save a little.

      My rent is going up 15%, which confuses me because people are moving out left and right. I’ve been a great tenant, have been in the complex for two years, and would have been fine going another year at my rent (~950 for a 1/1.5). I told them that charging me $1100/month was insulting, considering they’ve got the one next door advertised for $50 less per month, and that if they wanted me to leave for whatever reason, they could have just not offered to renew my lease.

   7. Please know that you are doing GREAT for saving for an emergency fund and for retirement. Really great. You are being super responsible and you will benefit from doing the right thing. It sounds really hard. Think about how smart you are being and how good it will feel when you have your financial freedom based on your own hard work and smart money management.

   8. I’m not sure if this would work for you — but our very nice, doorman building tried to increase our rent the first year, but we were able to negotiate that price down through various mechanisms. Plus, it really shouldn’t go up again this year — I would think we are in the second dip of the recession, and I’m pretty sure that my NYC rent is not going to go up.

      On the other hand, you might simply live in a more coveted area where there are extremely few vacancies.

   9. This sucks. Honestly, though, I don’t know which I hate worse, renting apartments or owning property.

      Food for thought: I was recently researching current mortgage requirements and, while most big lenders are pushing for higher down payments, FHA loans can be obtained for much less with good credit scores. I read a pretty compelling article that suggested that, even with slightly higher interest rates and fees, getting a mortgage with a smaller down payment actually could cost you a lot less over the same period of time than trying to save 20% while renting for years. I’m still trying to figure this all out but maybe those with more experience could share information. So, long story short, maybe you can buy sooner than you think if you can get some savings pulled together.

   10. Yikes. Yet another reminder that I should be grateful every day to live in a city with rent control. (I tend to lose sight of that because the *amount* of rent we pay is ridiculous.) OP, would it make your work commute too horrible to move to a rent-control area? I know San Francisco has it — though I don’t think it applies to apartment buildings constructed after a certain year — and Berkeley, too.

   11. We had one of these in June, and it was awful. I definately cried. We tried to negotiate down, but our landlord was inflexible. We looked at other places, but we’re already in the cheapest place in the area. I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through it to.
       I know SV can be a housing mess (I hear that renting can be cheaper than buying except for over very long terms there) so they probably know they have you over a barrel. For me, it just made me redistribute some income from retirement to my down payment fund every month so that I can get to ownership more quickly. Good luck!

9. Have you considered asking for a reduction in the increase? Or a stepped increase? Say..it goes up $50 the first month, $75 the next, $100 the month after that… If you have to deal with issues like you’ve described, your landlord may just be happy to have a tenant that pays rent and doesn’t demand much else!

10. Ugh. I second the roommate suggestion. I live in Santa Monica and can only afford to do that by sharing a 2BR with another person. When I was looking for this place, I rapidly determined I could get a lot nicer place for the money by being open to a share. And my roommate is awesome, so I’m glad to have her in my life. Bonus.

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