Corporette.com

Updated: Nov 3, 2020 178 Comments · by

Coffee Break: Sequin Slippers!

Coffee Break

This post may contain affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Ok, guys — we've been talking for weeks about everyone's plan to vote; let's share our plan for self-care tonight (and tomorrow and uh maybe next week)? What shows and books are you planning to binge, what comforts foods are you eating (or drinking), and are you connecting with friends or doing your own thing?

Personally I did like 40 minutes of restorative yoga last night (with extra emphasis on my lower back, which is really tight!) and meditated — and tonight there will definitely be at least one cocktail, and dinner will probably involve melted cheese. My dreams have gotten truly crazy the past few nights, though, so I'm going to try hard to remind myself that the best self-care is good sleep!

These super fun slippers seem like the perfect thing for a spa night at home and, heck, a long, cold winter — they kind of elevate the everyday. It should be noted that these are the hugely popular UGG slippers lined with plush and shearling — now with sequins! Yes! They're $99 at Nordstrom, Zappos, and Neiman Marcus.

(Speaking of spa nights — does anyone have any products like these facial rollers or gua sha tools? I've clearly seen too many TikTok/Instagram/etc. videos on them because now I'm curious…)

This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!

Sales of note for 9.30.24

Sales of note for 9.30.24

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. Anon

    How concerned would you be if you didn’t start saving for retirement until age 28? This is my situation…and not because I went to law school or other professional school where I am now poised to make a very high salary, but just because I messed up and made some mistakes in my early twenties. I currently make $90k and don’t anticipate that it will go much higher than that (maybe low six figures). I’ve used some retirement calculators and they all indicate that I won’t have enough saved. I feel lost and behind.

    • anon

      The best thing you can do is start saving as much as you can now. You can’t change the past.

    • Anonymous

      You can definitely save a good amount for retirement starting at age 28 and making close to six figures. Many people are not in a position to start saving seriously for retirement until their late twenties or early thirties. Time is your friend. Start socking away as much as you can now in order to get the full benefit of compound interest.

    • Anon

      Slightly concerned to not concerned, though I’m guessing I’ll be an outlier here. This board skews toward people with high incomes and who started saving for retirement unusually early compared to most people in this country. I started my 401k around 28 after finishing law school (but I am not in big law), but at this point I have no real cash savings to speak of (though I’m working on it) and I also feel very behind when I read posts here about net worth and savings, etc. But when I look at real people I know, I have very close friends in their forties with no cash savings and no 401k at all. I have family members in their thirties – same. You might feel left behind compared to others on this board, but you aren’t compared to many, many others. Just steadily save what you can – it starts adding up fast, and I bet in a couple of years you’ll feel a lot better about where you are.

    • Anon

      OP here…I should have clarified that this is all current. I am 28 and only just now starting.

      • Anon

        I wouldn’t be too worried either–just start saving now and save more than recommended (if possible). You’re still plenty young and have lots of time ahead of you.

      • Anon

        What you did in the past doesn’t matter. Start today. You’ll absolutely be better off than most. I didn’t start saving until 27 or 28, make about half what you make and have a NW of approx $390k at age 42. Live a simple life, keep your expenses down, don’t get hung up on keeping up with the Joneses and you’ll be just fine. You got this!

      • PolyD

        I went to grad school for a PhD and then postdoc for about 3 years, so I didn’t start saving significantly until I was about 30-32 years old. Before that I did try to save about $25-50 a month into an IRA, but that’s about it.

        20 years later, I am closing in on $900K in various savings (401Ks, mutual funds, other savings) and while I make pretty good money, I didn’t clear $100K until I was into my 40s. I have no kids, so that was a savings, but live in a relatively HCOL area, not Boston or San Francisco levels, but not cheap.

        And I don’t feel like I was particularly deprived all this time either. In normal times, I go out to eat, go to shows, go on trips, buy shoes. The key is to start saving as soon as you can, no matter how little, and just forget about that money and let it grow. Also increase your savings when you get a raise – I mean, my lifestyle definitely got more extravagant, but I also put away more as my slavery increased.

        • Anon

          Freudian typo? “as my slavery increased” sometimes autocorrect knows us too well ; )

    • Anonymous

      Are you maxing out your 401k contribution or using a lower employer-matched number? I saved at a much lower 4% rate for too long and now contribute 18%, so it is growing faster.

      More than that – the best time to start is now. You are 28 and you can’t change the past, but you have a lot of working years ahead of you.

    • AnonMom

      I didn’t start until later than that, and by all calculators I run, I’ll be fine with my balance by the time I reach retirement age. I make a bit less than you and am the sole breadwinner for my 3-person house. We live a comfortable middle class life in a L/MCOL area in a builder grade house, don’t take expensive vacations, don’t have pricey hobbies, have student loans, but are finally able to max out my 401k contribution annually and put a bit in my IRA each year.

      My assumptions assume a similar lifestyle in retirement, though. Not planning to end up in a luxury mansion with lots of exotic travel or anything like that.

    • Anonymous

      Not concerned and not willing to expend energy on something I can’t fix now. The only thing you can do is make saving a priority going forward. Do that. And know that in reality, you are way ahead of the vast majority of people (including me).

    • Flats Only

      Not at all. I started at about that time, making way less than you, and contributing just enough to get the match. It’s been 20 years, I increased my contributions over the years, the markets have done well by me, and now I have many hundreds of thousands of dollars in my 401k. I was not expecting a yacht-and-country-club type retirement, so I think I will be just fine. And so will you.

    • Anon

      Starting early didn’t help me all that much. I was unemployed in my field for most of my 30s, stringing together waitressing and freelance copywriting jobs that paid a pittance. Now I have to make up for that time, despite doing everything “right” as soon as I turned 22.

      Do the best you can with what you have, here and now.

    • Leatty

      I’m of the opinion that you shouldn’t stress about it – you can’t go back in time and start saving any earlier, so I’d just focus on what you need to do going forward. If at all possible, max out.

      And if it makes you feel any better, I didn’t start saving until I was 27 or so (and started maxing out at 30), and the retirement calculators show that I’m on track.

    • Sal

      Not concerned at all. I started saving at the same age and think I’m on track decades later — just start now. Good on you for starting now – focus on that.

    • anon

      Forecasting what you will need in retirement is difficult and I think most retirement calculator will tell you you are behind. That fear of missing out or being behind can be utilized by the companies behind the calculators to sell you things (or help you for high fees) you might not need. It sounds like you know the basics already: you know you need to save for retirement and you seem to be indicating you are in a place to start that process currently. That’s great news! Also kudos to you for working through those previous mistakes and getting to the point where you can start to focusing on retirement.
      If your employer offers a 401(k) option, start there, especially if they match your contribution to any extent. If stock or mutual fund picking isn’t your thing, see if they have a target fund (with a set retirement date) and save the yearly contribution maximum amount, OR at least the amount needed to get a full match by your employer into that account.
      I’m very employer centric for retirement plans because i have never been self employed. If you don’t have an employer retirement account option, then I don’t have specific advice but the overall idea remains the same: just start savings as much as you can into the account you pick. Starting saving for retirement at 28 is just fine as long as you start.

    • Anon

      Not concerned at all. I barely saved a thing until after getting my Ph.D when I was 30. 10 years later our net worth is close to a million. Our household income since then has been between $100 and $150k (and won’t increase much) and we’ve lived in a VHCOL area about half that time. Living in a MCOL the other half of the time really helped, though, since we were able to save more than half our salaries during that time. We also didn’t have any loans, which is the tradeoff for grad school vs. professional degrees, and work for state universities which give us access to lots of pretax savings (401a, 403b, 457b).

      Those things might not apply to you, but it sounds like you’re getting an earlier start and making much more money than I was, so just start saving and it can add up surprisingly fast (I’m assuming you’re in a position to do this based on your post, obviously I understand that people have complicated lives that can make this harder). This is a good time to start living more frugally since you can’t spend money on a lot of the things you normally do. Once you get in the habit of saving instead of spending, it gets easier. Good luck!

    • pugsnbourbon

      You are far from alone in this, and you still have plenty of time to save. I made a hell of a lot of mistakes in my early 20s too! I don’t have as much saved as most folks on this board, but I’m working at it and continuing to build it up. You got this!

    • anon

      Just start now! At least you’re not saddled with law school or other grad school debt. Many lawyers go deep into debt for law school and graduate making around $100K. (Not Big Law, probably not in NYC/SF, but many graduates all over the country).

    • Anonymous

      Just start now. I started at 22. Sibling 1 started at 33. Sibling 2 is 36 now and hasn’t started.

      Start now and if it’s something that’s bugging you, put a lot of money in. Max out your 401k and your IRA. When I started at 22 I was not maxing out– I was trying to contribute enough to get the employer match.

    • Anonymous

      You should not be concerned at all. You will probably retire in 35 or 40 years. That’s a really long time, and many things will change. I have found that retirement calculators tend to focus on replacing your income, but what you need to fund is your expenses. It’s really hard to predict what your expenses will be when you retire. Where you are now, a quick start would be:
      1. Participate in whatever programs are available to you — employer 401ks, or IRAs, etc. Always get the full match, and never touch this money unless it is literally life or death.
      2. Have a budget. Understanding your expenses helps you manage them and set priorities. Also, watch the expenses of your investments, it should be easy to find on the website of whatever company has your funds.
      3. If you get a raise, or a windfall, save some and spend some.
      4. Don’t buy or sell without careful thought, slow and steady wins this race.
      5. Take advantage of financial education opportunities — your employer may have sessions on the 401k, or your local library might, or even podcasts.

      It’s never too late, 28 sounds like a really good time to start, and you will be fine.

    • Anonymous

      Just start now, and don’t give in to lifestyle creep until you feel like you have caught up. There are blogs with lots of ideas on how to keep costs down.

  2. Anon

    Also, OP, take the advice and experience on this board with a grain of salt. It’s not really representative of the greater world out there, or what most people do/think. But it is easy to read this board and feel bad about yourself in comparison.

  3. Anonymous

    Really enjoyed reading everyone’s comments about the realities of obtaining birth control as a minor in their rural/small communities compared to those of us (me) who grew up in more liberal metro areas. This is an issue I care extremely deeply about. On a lighter note, I thought it might be fun if anyone wants to share funny/embarrassing stories about their experiences getting the talk or accessing birth control for the first time. Mine: I had a “serious” BF in HS and my parents were very sex-positive, never discouraged me, just openly talked about safety. I was still very embarrassed and shy about the topic. After multiple conversations, my mom’s way of trying to not embarrass me further was to hide a bulk package of condoms under my pillow, like a the tooth fairy. But, like, the condom fairy. Asking to to see a OB-Gyn for BC was way less embarrassing after that ordeal. So grateful to my mom in retrospect, and my dad too, who was on the same page.

    • Anonymous

      My family was very strict and religious. We never talked about anything. I grew up best friends with the girl next door “Jessica” until she started hanging out with a pretty bad crowd in high school (her boyfriend got kicked out for bringing a gun kind of crowd). One time while my dad was driving me to a different friend’s house, he asked me why Jessica and I weren’t friends anymore and that we had too many years of friendship to just let go and that I shouldn’t be stubborn. I listened to the lecture for what seemed like ages and then blurted out “She’s a big druggie now who sleeps with every guy. Is that really the kind of person you want me hanging out with?” Big silence for like 10 minutes. My dad then says “Well, everybody experiments. That’s one thing. But the other– her husband is going to be awfully disappointed on their wedding night.” In other words, do drugs. Just don’t sleep with anyone.

      I’m 47 now and dad has long since passed. But I still shake my head at his “advice” and how awkward all of that was. Like what in the heck kind of talk was that?!

      • Anon

        Ugh this idea that a woman’s virginity belongs to her future husband makes me sick. You never really hear it in reverse – if anything, the future bride is supposed to be grateful her husband has experience and knows what he is doing.

        • Anonymous

          Trust me, in his mind everyone was supposed to be a virgin on their wedding night.

    • Kate

      I had ovarian surgery as a young teenager, and the doctor recommended I go on the pill to help regulate my cycle after that. I was embarrassed to use it as I worried my super-conservative friends and family would assume I was …of loose morals. Looking back, there’s no way my parents would have allowed it afterwards. This unexpected silver lining helped keep any worries about information on my parents’ insurance off the table!

    • Anon

      Years of testing had come up with no diagnosis for my severe dysmenorrhea, so my gyn suggested constant pill use (this was before Seasonale and the like existed) to mask the symptoms. My father flipped his shiz, totally forbidding it and having a complete door-slamming, glass-breaking, silent-treatment meltdown.

      (To give an idea of my issues: since age 11, I was bleeding heavily for 7-12 days a month, with constant vomiting, dizziness, and occasional fainting. It was affecting my grades, my attendance, and my mental health.)

      My mom pulled me aside, and told me to stop sucking it up. We were a very Puritan work-ethic household, and every month I did my best to do my fair share and not slack due to not feeling well. On Mom’s advice, I stopped fighting through it. My dad found me face-down in the only bathroom, passed out from the pain and violent vomiting. Suddenly, because he was inconvenienced, BCP was just fine.

      That was a lesson about sh!tty men that I’ve never forgotten.

      • Anonymous

        Ugh that is awful I am so sorry you experienced this. Once again a man’s feelings (which were prob based on misinformation or ignorance) trumps a woman’s actual medical needs and physical pain. Snowflakes, men are.

      • Vicky Austin

        Jesus, your dad sounds like a real joy. I’m sorry you had to go through all that.

      • Senior Attorney

        I was telling my husband just last night how effed-up it is that girls were just told to suck it up with symptoms like that when I was growing up in the 70s. Unbelievable.

        • Anon

          This is STILL what we’re told if the pill doesn’t fix things. When I had breakthrough bleeding for weeks on end on the pill, my gynecologist shrugged, and the pharmacist told me that that’s just how things are; all women go through it. (Then I got vulvodynia on the next pill they had me try, and migraines that lasted days on the next one… It’s almost as if women need medical options designed for their conditions and not repurposed contraceptive pills?)

    • anon

      This was only embarrassing because I was a teenager, but my high school BF’s dad just left a box of condoms on top of his dresser one day. I mean, absolutely the right thing to do, but I felt weird that his dad thought we were having s*x (we weren’t, actually, but I guess if a parent waits until they know it’s happening, it’s too late).

      My mom found me an OB-Gyn when I was around 15 (before my first BF) and told her I could talk to her about anything, and the information was private. I didn’t exactly realize my mom meant I could ask her for birth control since I didn’t have my first bf yet, but I figured it out when I needed to. Pretty solid way to go.

      • LaurenB

        So I dated (wound up marrying) a med student whose father was an OB-gyn. He asked his son “what kind of pill is she on, I’ll get her a few freebie packs.” I was mortified at the time, but to my now-FIL OB-gyn (now retired) and to my now-husband OB-gyn, birth control pills are about as non-controversial as vitamins. It would not have occurred to FIL in the least to actually link that to “hey, I’m sleeping with your son” — rather it was “hey, I can save you some money, so why not.” My parents were not in medicine, but felt the same way. I am very glad for this matter-of-fact approach.

    • anon

      There are so many sh*tty dads on this thread and I am wanting to hug all of you ladies out there (especially the commenter whose dad found her passed out from pain and violently vomiting). This is making me want to cry…

      • Anon

        Same, I want to hug everybody. My dad was not that bad but he did use PMS as a way to invalidate my feelings, but he’s capable of invalidating my feelings in any situation so it was that different to what I was used to.

    • Anon

      I went on the pill for acne when I was in college. My parents never took us to the doctor for anything when I was growing up, but then I had my own insurance once I was in college and the student health center referred me to derm. Life changing. But about the pill – my mom apparently found the drug information pamphlet in my jeans pocket when I was home for a weekend, and she made a bunch of snide comments about me gaining weight (I did) and me being “loose” (I wasn’t).

      I was actually a virgin, much to my college boyfriend’s chagrin. I think her bitchy attitude about it was what pushed me over the edge to having sex, because if she was already going to think I was a s1ut, why not make it happen?

    • Nonnie

      My mom, when was I about 15, told me “if you ever need them, the condoms are in the top drawer of my dresser. But if I catch you using them, you’re grounded.” The last part was in jest, which was totally in our nature at the time, but I also recall thinking “ugh, there is no one at my high school that I would want to use them on”

    • Anonymous

      My mom has an undiagnosed anxiety disorder. When I started my period (at 11), she became convinced I was about to get pregnant. I wasn’t allowed to spend any time outside of an adult’s immediate line of sight; I was no longer allowed to even ride my bike around the neighborhood. I felt like I was being punished for hitting puberty. In middle school, my mother became convinced I was having sex (I wasn’t). One day she showed up at school and dragged me off the playground from recess. When I asked why, she told me I had a doctors appointment. She drove me 1.5 hours away to an OBGYN (we lived in a small town and she didn’t want anyone to talk). She demanded the doctor examine me and tell her if I was still a virgin. I cried the whole time during my first pap. When it was over, the doctor handed me a few packs of bc pills and I numbly took them. My mother used that as evidence that I had been having sex. She proceeded to berate me and call me a slut to my friends, teachers, church members, basically everyone I knew until I had no one left. I left that house when I was 16, got a GED, and didn’t go back for years. I try to have something of a relationship with my mother. Every once in a while she still brings up what a horrible kid I was and I surely would’ve gotten pregnant if not for her intervention. Let’s just say we continue to have a strained relationship.

      • Anonymous

        omg wtf. Internet hugs to you, Anonymous, this must have been so traumatic. Horrible that a doctor would agree to participate in a medical exam that is not science-based and non consensual. What a horrible lesson about consent, bodily autonomy, and self worth to teach a young girl. Especially in middle school, when all negative experiences become magnified and seared into our memories in a particularly punishing way. I hope you are healing.

      • Anonymous

        I sorry that happened to you. I know you don’t need me to say this, but there is no requirement to continue to have a relationship with anyone who treats you like that, including and especially your mother.

      • Anon

        That actually sounds like undiagnosed/untreated borderline personality disorder. Ask me how I know. (Hint: ask me about my mom).

        I am sorry you had experiences like that growing up.

    • Anonymous

      I do a lot of research before jumping into things and before becoming sexually active read a few chapters of a biology textbook checked out from the local community library! My Dad thought I was considering AP Bio!

      • Anon

        Hahaha you’re my kind of nerd. I took a semester of Human Sexuality in college. I considered it an instructional course.

    • Anonymous

      I was brought up Roman Catholic, and have been on my own since a teen. I was not aware that birth control existed until after I was married, and my employer sent out a note telling us that birth control would now be covered by our insurance (I think it was a new state law?). I wasn’t really sure how it all worked, but then I kind of pieced it together from things like Glamour magazine. I can’t imagine what I was thinking, obviously I must have read about it in fashion magazines or whatever before that, but it just didn’t dawn on me that this was something people I might know actually used. I learned how birth control works when the morning after pill came out, and I read up on it to see if it was abortion or not.

      I have not to this day used birth control, and had to pause for second to think how I would get it. Ask a doctor! I’m not sure if this is funny or sad, but it is a little funny that I turned to Glamour and Self instead of like just asking someone at work.

    • anonymous

      My high school boyfriend’s liberal hippy father barged into his bedroom one afternoon (where we were laying in bed, under the covers, without pants), sat down, and reported that he had “learned that we had touched mucus membranes.” I hid, and he proceeded to describe a variety of STIs and their effects. He directed us to make smart choices, and left. He managed to say all this with a serious but still disarmingly, subtly cheeky tone of voice. A few hours later I had to have dinner with his whole family.

      As for BC, I had already had one annual apt by the time I started having sex (age 16), so I made another apt specifically to discuss BC. I had a great doctor who answered all my questions and treated me like an adult. He told my mom that he was going to prescribe BC and that it was good that I was taking responsible steps. I don’t think she would have protested, but I just recall her silently nodding her head. I don’t recall my parents having any conversations with me about sex. I assume they figured I’d figured everything out and would make good choices. I was already into reproductive rights and studying these things on my own by this point. They were right.

      • LaurenB

        When I was dating my now-husband, he was still living at home and I would spend the weekends. Of course, this being the old days, we played the game of going to bed in separate rooms and everyone politely ignored nocturnal traffic, as Miss Manners suggests. I was in his room when the door opened, in comes his mother (who was like Joan Rivers, loud, dramatic), with laundry, sits down on the bed mere inches from my face where I had dived under the covers and am now suffocating, and “wants to chat.” “Mom, it’s late! We’ll talk in the morning!” Knowing my MIL, I have no doubt she knew I was there and got a good laugh out of it …

    • conservative religious upbringing

      I grew up in a conservative religious household. I was 6 when my older cousin who first told me about how babies are made, and I was SHOCKED (she was 8 at the time). Like, there’s no way that actually happens, but she told me I couldn’t tell anyone because it was a secret. I wanted to confirm this crazy information, so I asked my mom, “How do babies get here?” She told me God puts the baby in a mommy’s tummy. This clearly did not line up, so I asked if the mommy had to do anything first. My mom tried to dance around the topic with another half-hearted answer or two, but my questions were quite pointed, so she finally had to explain everything to me. It was over two decades before I finally told her that I wasn’t just a sharp little kid, my cousin told me and I needed to verify it with an adult!

      That’s the last humorous story I have about s*x. The rest are the stuff you see comedians laugh at in horror: abstinence-only education with the terrible metaphors, assumptions that holding hands with a boy somehow meant having s*x, getting pregnant (and also doing drugs and drinking?), ridiculous privacy intrusions well into college (I had my own apartment that I paid for and my mom still tried to tell me that I couldn’t have my boyfriend over to my place). Fortunately my dad was a decent buffer, and I was stubborn enough to make my own good choices.

  4. Anonymous

    Looking for advice/suggestions. I’ve starting getting grey hairs. My hair is dark black, bra strap length and no layers. I have never dyed my hair before but I do want to cover the greys. I’m torn if I should just dye it straight black to match my natural color or if I should go blonde and hide the greys with highlights and lowlights. My mom and my aunt have dark black hair like me and they both dye theirs black. It hides the grey but when their roots grow in it is very noticeable. My grandmother was naturally blonde and she gets highlights and lowlights and her grey grow in is not as obvious. Any advice on which road would be better? I know nothing about hair coloring but I do want to hide my greys.

    • Anon

      How many grays do you have? Is it a small amount that a root touch up product would work between appointments?

    • Anon

      Your sister thinks that you should go ahead and dye it black!

      (Apologies if this is a sincere post and not some kind of market research.)

      • Cat

        lol this is the first thing I thought of, too.

        OP, if you’re a different poster than the one at the end of the weekend thread, dying it black or dark brown is going to be way, way easier to maintain.

      • pugsnbourbon

        I thought the same thing :)

        OP, I’d recommend a consult with a colorist – ask your friends if they have someone they like and trust.

    • eertmeert

      Lightening damages hair, so keep that in mind when balancing your options. In addition, bleached/dyed blonde will turn brassy so you need to use purple shampoos to remove the brassiness. You will still have the roots issues as it grows out. I am not sure which would be most maintenance heavy.

    • Flats Only

      Color it black to hide the greys. Having it bleached out with highlights will do much more damage to it in the long run, especially if its got some length like yours. They greys might not show, but it will feel like straw, and look like it too. Find a color product that doesn’t leave your hair dull – with dark hair it can be beautifully shiny if you find the right products.

    • Anon

      Black hair to blonde is going to be a lot of work. You would have to strip the color, then dye it blonde. If your new growth is black and gray you are going to have to deal with the roots in the same way.

    • anon

      With your context (length, never dyed, the concerns), I would just match your natural color. If you have dark black hair you do NOT want to go blonde just to cover greys. You will be in for a shock; it’s not just a coat of color to go lighter, to go from black to blonde you will need to bleach your hair, likely multiple times. Your hair will not grow out like your grandmothers, it will still grow out black with greys and you’ll have to maintain your roots. Your hair texture will change and could become brittle and dry. The maintenance is insane. This coming from a dark brunette who went blonde for 2 years. It was fun but it is not for the uninitiated.

    • Anon

      Black to blonde is going to turn your hair to straw, and sitting through highlight and lowlights is time-consuming and expensive. Just dye to match the black, and suck up the frequent maintenance. To extend time between colorings, experiment with the color sprays, pens, etc.

      Also, advice from a dark brunette: even though you’re dyeing to match your natural color, it will start to look severe and unnatural as you get older. Once you notice that, consider switching to a lighter, less stark color, even though it technically won’t be your “natural color” anymore. I look like a corpse with my natural ash dark brown now, so I go with a medium golden brown.

    • Anonymous

      What about leaving it natural since the person who does that looks the best?

      • Anon

        I like natural for myself, but I also believe it’s ok to color. However, the people who look best with color go with a pro.

    • Anon

      If you go blond you will have a constant battle with dark roots. I’d do something like Madison Reed at home. Their online color matching tool was really helpful for me.

    • Anonymous

      This was me, six months ago. I have dark dark brown hair (I am of English heritage not Asian, on which women I most commonly see my color hair) and “winter” coloring. I’m 37 and going grey enough that it bothers me. I’ve never dyed my hair and didn’t know where to start. I finally found a stylist i like who gave me a nice haircut (added some layers) and suggested “mini highlights.” Not sure what is mini about them, other than they are sort of a golden and look great. I am supposed to go in every 3 months or so to get them touched up. I’m about 6 weeks into the color and it’s growing out nicely. There are some grey roots visible but they are well blended in with the golden highlights.

      The colorist advised me that if I dyed the whole thing (either to match my natural color or a slightly lighter color) I’d have to come in every 6-8 weeks and I just don’t have time for that.

    • NP

      Embrace those grays! You likely earned them.
      Be natural…for two reasons:
      1) you’ll save money;
      2) the roots are VERY obvious, as you mentioned.

      I’m 36 w/ very dark hair & a few grays are already appearing. Oh well. Yes, I earned them.

      I hear other ladies complaining about the time & money spent (wasted) on maintaining something fake. Save your money & time.

  5. Anonymous

    For those of you who live in apartments and are still worried about the pandemic — any hesitations in turning on your heating system? I feel like I remember a discussion from this summer where a few people were saying they weren’t using their AC even in the heat of the south or were running it with their windows open because they had some concerns about connected duct work thru the building. As I understand my heating system, the unit is in my apartment but though IDK if the heat is coming out from your heater straight to the vent in your living room/bedroom or if it flows thru duct work connected thru other apartments.

    I live in the southern part of the mid atlantic so you can get away without using heat until Dec/Jan. But now it’s getting chilly in the mornings and it’d be nice to heat up the apartment for 10 min in the morning though that can also be done via space heater. Thoughts? I feel like maybe there’s more knowledge about this since the summer and I assume we have some people here who follow this closely.

    • Thanks, it has pockets!

      We live in an apartment complex with like 20 other units, and honestly, it hasn’t even crossed our minds that the heating system would be an issue. I mean, we’re in Boston, we need heat to live, and we can’t just suddenly buy a house, so it is what it is I guess.

    • Anon

      Ask your building management if they have a HEPA or similar filtration system if that will put your mind to rest. If not, you can potentially get a standalone HEPA filter like many schools are doing. Many older school buildings don’t have this built in, but they are putting the units in the classrooms.

    • Anonymous

      I live in a condo somewhere with extreme heat in the summer and it is now already cold enough to use the heat. It just isn’t an option for me not to run the air conditioner or the heat. It also isn’t an option for me not to take the elevator multiple times a day (I have a dog). I do what I can to minimize my exposure but not using the AC or turning the heat on is not one of those things. I also haven’t heard of people just existing and using the AC/heat in residential buildings as being the source of a lot of exposures, but admittedly I haven’t gone looking for those stories either.

    • Anonymous

      Find out how your heat works; this is highly variable and somewhat regionally dependent. I live in NYC and we have no control over our heat at all, as is typical in older buildings here. We have steam heated radiators; there is no ventilation or air coming in or out of our unit other than passively through opening doors or windows. I guess there is an exhaust fan in the bathroom, but that’s it.

      • LaurenB

        In Taiwan where they have controlled the pandemic, it’s very hot and humid and Taipei has tons of tall NYC-esque apartment buildings where they run a/c. So presumably a/c is ok.

  6. Worried

    A trivial question, but something I am curious about. I was asked to help mentor an intern at work by a coleauge. Essentially, we would both be working with her and mentoring her. I agreed, and he introduced me to her and she appears personable and ready. I usually meet with mentees and we exchange emails, talk, chat and so on. We talked for a bit when my colleague introduced me to her (he was supposed to work with her, but is quite busy, so he wants her to have another mentor) . I emailed my colleague about how we would mentor her, but she has not been by to see me or give me her email etc.. I went to say hello today, and asked her to exchange info, and she was more than willing. I figure it is my role to reach out, but I’m wondering if you think she should be more proactive and show interest in working with me? I’m overthinking this, but in the past I have been described as ‘too kind’ to mentors, so I have lost my compass a bit!

    • eertmeert

      If she is an intern I would give her a pass on this. It is likely she has no idea what the process is.

      • Anon

        +1 even early in my career, I was always worried about bothering people above me, whom I perceived to be impossibly busy.

    • Anon

      She should reach out, but she is an intern and it seems she doesn’t understand this. Make this part of your mentoring.

    • Worried

      Thank you for the gut check! I appreciate your suggstions – they are validating as that was my instinct, but I had a moment of doubt there!

    • Sloan Sabbith

      Not sure how old she is, can’t tell from your post, but when I was in college and early law school, I did NOT want to be seen as annoying. I probably also wouldn’t have gone to “bother” someone if I didn’t have a specific question- just going to talk to them and “take up their time” would not have been something I would have been willing to do.

      • Cat

        Yes this, I would have been nervous at overstepping, at being seen as presumptuous, etc.

    • Anon

      I did not realize until this post that a mentee should reach out in the absence of specific questions/concerns. I’ve always been too worried about wasting busy people’s time. This might explain why I never met with my mentor when I was in big law.

    • mentoring

      She’s probably confused about the process, since it sounds like she was assigned to/met your colleague first. Maybe she thinks that he just introduced you to be nice but she’s not actually supposed to contact you regularly? I would establish some ground rules and expectations before assuming that she’s just not being proactive. Similar to other posters, I wouldn’t want to annoy my mentor, so I would only reach out if I had a specific question.

    • Anon

      There are so many different kinds of mentors – ones you go to for assignments, ones you go to about problems, ones you go to about professional development, etc. You should be clear with this person about your role and also whether they or she should initiate contact and how often.

  7. anon

    Reposting from the moms’ board: I am accepting that Thanksgiving with our extended family is not happening this year. (I have thought through numerous alternatives and none are feasible for one reason or another, so I’m not asking for suggestions on how to do it anyway.) Any ideas for making it special for our household of four? I’ll admit that I’m struggling with this emotionally. We have chosen to live within an hour’s drive of our families because, well, we like each other, get along, and want to be together. I have literally never had a holiday with just my immediate family. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, siblings are always part of the picture. Part of me is semi-relieved to do less cooking — we usually host — but I still want it to feel like a holiday! We’ve already been spending LOTS of time together, lol.

    We lost my grandpa this summer, which only serves to remind me that life is short and holidays together are not guaranteed. I know, I know … 2020 is “only one year,” but please be kind. This freaking s*cks and I’m all out of emotional bandwidth for being creative with my celebrations.

    • Anon

      If you all live nearby, can you drop off holiday dishes to each other and eat them together via zoom? OTOH, if you are relieved to get a break from the cooking, by all means embrace that! Other ideas with kids: make extra/different decorations, morning pajama party, crafting activity that can be dropped off/mailed to grandparents.

    • Senior Attorney

      Can you Zoom with your family? Failing that, how about being creative with the menu? Maybe let everybody pick a dish to cook?

      Or how about just putting the kids in charge? Let them figure it out and execute it!

      • Senior Attorney

        And if you do put the kids in charge, remember what my son always says: “No wrong answers!”

    • Anon

      Unless you ordinarily cook massive, multi-course meals, a Thanksgiving dinner for 4 is still a pretty big production and well outside of the everyday.
      If you live somewhere the weather allows it, maybe do a day trip to a hiking destination that would normally be packed. I tend to always opt for “celebrate in nature”.

    • Cat

      I grew up having holidays as just our nuclear family of 4 almost every year since we lived far away from family. Having special traditions (like we always did our Christmas decorating the Sat-Sun of TG weekend) meant it felt different and special even without other guests.

    • Anon

      I spent most holidays with my immediate family when I was growing up and that was just me and my parents. They still managed to be special. The attitude that it’s not possible to have a special holiday with just four people will really hurt your chances.

      • anon

        I didn’t say it wasn’t possible — hence asking for suggestions! I’m tired of the advice that I should happily embrace what is. I will. But it’s an adjustment, one that I really didn’t want to make, and I’m tired of exercising creativity in every other aspect of life.

        • Anonymous

          I’m in your same shoes. I have always gathered with extended family and this will be the first time it is just me and my husband. To say this is difficult is not meant to insult people who don’t routinely celebrate these holidays with extended family and I really don’t understand why somebody would take it that way. I totally get where you’re coming from.

    • SC

      From your post, you sound a little burnt out–relieved to do less cooking, already spending LOTS of time with immediate family, low emotional bandwidth for creativity. What if the special thing this year is to relax about it all? Order your meal (or the sides or the desserts) prepared from a caterer or restaurant or grocery store instead of cooking. Eat off decorative paper plates. Put a marathon of Thanksgiving sitcom episodes on the TV. Have a set time for the family to eat together, maybe plan one activity (a walk or bike ride or board game), and otherwise let the members of your immediate family do their own thing the rest of the day. Drink wine.

      When I was in law school, I wouldn’t travel for Thanksgiving break. DH worked, and I studied for exams, but we both had/took off Thanksgiving Day. We would order 16 portions of Thanksgiving food from a caterer for just the two of us, and we’d eat it from Thursday until Sunday. On Thanksgiving Day, we ate a bunch and probably sat around playing video games and binge watching TV. They were some of my favorite Thanksgivings.

      • anon

        Burned out is a good way to describe it. I want the day to feel special, but I’m just plain worn out.

        • SC

          Prioritize what’s really important and let the rest go. One of the luxuries of “immediate family only” is that you have fewer people to please! It will feel special to say “f* it” to all the stuff that’s just extra work.

      • anonono

        Yes be relaxed! How old are your kids? Because you can make things feel super fun with *really* easy things! Make the night before Thanksgiving frozen pizza night! Or the day of have a “mini food” thanksgiving with appetizers from Trader Joe’s and individual sized pumpkin pies in ramikins (and then maybe still serve turkey, but it will seem giant next to all the food…which seems delightful to me anyway)! Spend 10 minutes on Amazon or Etsy, buy some fun/kooky table and household decorations and have your kids set the table and decorate! I think you’ll enjoy it, even if it’s not ideal for you and your family :)

    • Ribena

      We don’t have Thanksgiving here but we have had Christmas tables for 4-5 people the last few years (My parents, me, and my brother/uncle/both). To make it work, I help my mum in the kitchen all morning, so we’re having fun, and we pre-buy or pre-make as many elements of the meal as we can.

    • Thanks, it has pockets!

      I’m so sorry for your loss. You’re absolutely right that holidays are never guaranteed.

      One thing you could do to make it feel more festive is to decorate, with autumnal decorations and candles. If you’re up for it, of course.

      What about making the meal a family effort, instead of just you cooking? Without people coming over, there’s room for error, and you don’t have to stick to the traditional meal. Are there dishes your kids could help make? Could your husband take over a part of the meal, even if that means grilling the protein instead of roasting it in the oven? Or as others suggested, maybe this is the year you order the meal – could you splurge on something from a nice restaurant?

    • Betsy

      I wonder if doing something just really different from your norm would feel like a fun, memorable way of making the best of things. Like if you normally do a pretty fancy meal, making it a super dressed down, eat it in a pillow fort in the living room meal. Alternatively, if your big gathering is usually kind of casual, doing a super fancy meal by getting the kids dressed up (like maybe in a combination of actual dress clothes and dress-up clothes), pulling out the fancy china and letting the kids drink from stemware. My family often did Thanksgiving with just our immediate family growing up, and I really remember the years where my parents made it fancy. But I also look back and recognize that there were some years where we ate Thanksgiving in our PJs because that’s all my parents had the capacity to handle, and those years were totally fine too. Go easy on yourself – you’ve been through a tough year and this should be a holiday for you too.

    • Walnut

      My favorite part of Thanksgiving is allll the side dishes. I’m considering cooking them slowly all day and just eating each on it’s own as it comes out of the oven.

      • Anon

        I have heard of no-turkey thanksgivings. Honestly sounds like a great idea to me.

        As long as there’s turkey gravy for the mashed potatoes.

    • Anon

      I have been having thanksgiving for just my family of four for years now. My dad died when I was early 20s. I used to spend the day with my mom, but she got into a relationship with a man whose family was very dominant about their thanksgivings, not to mention super obnoxious and argumentative, so I just didn’t want to go to theirs (and wasn’t particularly welcome) so I had to make it my own holiday.

      My good friend for a long time was estranged from her family, so she joined us for several years and we were five. But she has happily reunited with one of her siblings so we are back to four- me, husband, two kids.

      I cook the whole shebang. We get a10 – 12 lb heritage turkey, which is plenty big enough for the meal plus leftovers, but a reasonable size that cooks well without getting too dried out. I dry brine it two days ahead. The day before I make turkey stock from some wings. The day of, I have a cooking/oven usage schedule that I do ahead to keep myself organized. Honestly, I like the challenge of being organized and on time.

      As my kids have gotten older, they have taken on some dishes themselves, which is fun, but they have to talk with me ahead of time about where they are on the kitchen and oven schedule and stick to that.

      We eat the big meal in the afternoon and then usually takes a long family walk to look at leaves and etc in order to feel less full. We usually play some sort of game and then eat pie in the evening. The next day, the Christmas decorations come out.

      It’s a pretty fun but quiet and intimate day for us, and I would not trade it for a big, boisterous multi-family meal for anything in the world. We are building our own traditions (like I make maple pecan popcorn for everyone to munch on but not get too full on while waiting for the meal) that my kids will probably recreate in their own homes someday.

    • The original Scarlett

      We’re just the two of us this year and we usually host. Neither of us like turkey, so we’re making coq au vin, scalloped potatoes and a green salad. We also mix fancy cocktails and will kick things off with a HH. I’ll probably cut some flowers and make the table pretty, too.

  8. Anon for this!

    I have an advanced degree in psychology and started practicing employment law about 10 years ago. I’ve recently noticed (maybe due to COVID) that most of my friends are asking me for advice. I don’t mind, I love them and am happy to listen and share as appropriate, but some of them have expressed feeling guilty as I never ask them for advice. It truly isn’t a burden, but they’re right – I don’t ask many people for life advice. I have a pretty clear plan in life for finances, my free time, health/skincare, relationships, etc., and I’m happy with it about 99% of the time. That said, I’d like to start asking friends for advice! Things I don’t want: cooking advice (I don’t cook and will not start), diet stuff, decorating. What are some low-pressure topics I can ask them about – bonus points where they wouldn’t be upset if I DON’T take the advice? Things I’ve thought of: TV shows (I never watch it but would like to pick a show this winter), something to do with crafting, hard to kill plants.

    • Senior Attorney

      What about just tackling it in the moment instead of forcing yourself to ask for advice you don’t really want? When somebody says “I feel guilty because you never ask me for advice,” say, “Okay! What’s your best piece of advice — lay it on me right now!”

    • Anon

      One easy way to do this would also be to text a picture of clothes/gifts/items that you’re thinking of buying with comments like “love these boots, think I’m getting them” or something along those lines “Do you think this plant will survive on the kitchen windowsill?” or “Looking at this for a Christmas gift for my niece.” You’re not exactly asking for advice, but it gives them a chance to give you feedback or opinions that you can take or leave and it is all very low stakes.

    • Anon

      Think about what your specific friends are good at and what they pride themselves on. They would like to be asked for advice on those topics. I have two close girlfriends who are very different. If I asked my friend Beth for shopping or makeup advice, she would laugh in my face. Beth wears leggings 99% of the time and no makeup. But I would ask Beth for workout advice or where to go on some great socially distanced hikes. I could also ask her what kind of scotch I should buy for a gift. She would also be my one-stop shop for advice on how to create appropriate boundaries at work.

      I could ask my friend Sarah none of those things, but I could ask her for decorating advice, how to make a pie crust that doesn’t mess up my entire kitchen and stays in one piece when I try to put it into the pie pan (in fact, I should probably ask her that) or how to have a conversation with my sister about the stupid crap we’ve been fighting about. And on a lighter note, I could ask her to keep me up to date on the latest trends and greatest new products in skincare.

      Both of these friends would be happy to help me with the stuff they’re good at, but would probably feel stressed out by being asked about the other stuff.

    • eertmeert

      What about a new restaurant, local hikes (I never hike but people who do seem to love talking about their favorite places), post-COVID travel plans, ideas for gifts for loved ones, which online printing shop to use for holiday cards.

  10. Vicky Austin

    Heaven save me from the well-meaning relatives texting election updates. Guys, I haven’t been on Facebook FOR A REASON.

    • Anon

      The only update I’ve seen so far is that there are no riots yet. I hope this is accurate, but I didn’t expect them to start until tomorrow anyway.

    • Anon

      Honestly, C0rpor3tte is keeping me off five thirty eight today. Yes, I will be responding to every post.

  11. Anon

    Well…my best friend (mid-20s, highly-educated, practice in law, worldly, etc.) who was vocally supporting Biden last time we discussed the election (about a month ago and not since to maintain sanity) told me she voted Trump this past weekend. She is not the first I personally know to flip, either from Biden to Trump or from Clinton in 2016 to Trump in 2020.

    Anyway, any fellow P.Volve devotees here? Do you have a favorite series? Anything that gave you results? I just finished doing a month of the Total P.Volve Experience series (week-long series that I repeated 4 times) and WOW it gave me actual arm and ab definition.

    • Anonymous

      I just don’t understand how on earth an informed person of any intelligence could make this choice. Ugh. Hope she save a ton of money on her taxes while the country and economy is in shambles and democracy dies!

    • Jules

      I have been working since 5 a.m. in a voter protection legal boiler room (virtual) and this comment actually made my stomach hurt. What is the matter with people?

      I’m trying to just get through today and not think about tonight, or tomorrow …

      Also, FWIW, I’m in Ohio and we are not seeing a lot of problems at least in my region and have pretty high turnout.

      • Monday

        Thank you for doing this! I think it should be promoted on this site since it has so many lawyers. I’m an outdoor poll observer today, been here since 6:30 am, things going smoothly overall.

        • Jules

          Thank you for doing this! It’s a long day, especially to be outside.

          I overslept and woke up at 4:54 a.m., six minutes before I was supposed to be on Zoom and logged into a database. I pulled it off, in my pajamas (camera off for the first few hours) but with my RBG pearls.

      • Anonymous

        Good to hear. I fully expect Ohio to go Red this year, but what a nice surprise it would be to be wrong.

  12. MS Finance

    Toying with the idea of going back for a MS Finance. It would be 100% online, part-time/self paced. I work in finance and came up a very non-traditional finance background. I’m very successful in my current role, having learned essentially everything on the job or through supplementary one-off courses I’ve taken over the years (accounting and the like). It’s hardly a requirement for continued success at current company. But, the course work fills a knowledge gap that I’ve always wanted and the degree itself fills what could appear to be a glaring gap in my resume for a future employer. I’ve found some online, self-paced degrees.

    What does everyone think? Good idea? Terrible idea? Is there a reason to get it from, say, UMass Lowell (where I’d get in-state tuition at 50% of other programs) vs. a some other reputable, household name? I’d pay out of pocket in cash, and I can objectively afford it without any negative implications to my finances.

    • OP

      Adding: I’m 13 years out of undergrad, 10 years into my finance career. I would ideally love a CFA but there’s NFW I can study for that given current work and home demands. I believe I could do an online-only, self paced MSF while juggling home and work.

    • Anon

      I don’t have any advice on your second paragraph, but I will say that if it’s affordable, I am 100% for education solely due to the desire to learn.

    • Anon

      What is your current level, and what level are you trying to get to? What kind of place do you work – ibank, corporate, consulting?

      I am in senior mgmt in corporate Finance so I can speak from that perspective. With 10 years of Finance experience, unless you’re trying to get to the C-suite, I’m not sure this is going to have a meaningful impact on your career path (or be needed on your resume). You can certainly get it for knowledge’s sake, but I don’t think you would necessarily advance faster or higher with a masters degree, and particularly not with an online version. In corporate finance, most of the value of a Masters or MBA comes from the networking with the people in your group projects rather than the actual coursework.

      • OP

        Without divulging too much, I currently work for an alternative investment advisory firm. We are hired by clients to advise on specific transactions/investments. I could possibly, though do not definitely, see myself getting tired of this grind in a number of years’ time (5? 15? don’t know…) and look for an in-house position at a company that we provide advisory services for. The kind of role that I’d arguably be qualified/looking for at that time would typically go to someone who has an advanced degree on the resume or at least a traditional finance undergrad degree, of which I have neither.

        To another poster’s point, it’s information that I’d love to have just for the sake of having it. Maybe that’s enough of a reason right there. I think having it would help me with confidence and maybe help silence imposter syndrome that I struggle with constantly.

        • Coach Laura

          I have a masters in Finance and an MBA and agree on education for its own sake too. But if you’re going to get the degree, I’d suggest the best known or most prestigious. Even mid-career, networking is helpful. But if you’re sure that you’re staying in Boston/Mass, and you meet a lot of people with UMass Lowell MBAs or Masters, then that may be such a good, well-known quantity in your market that it’s a good choice. You could also stretch and look at a program like Duke’s, Columbia, Penn, MIT or a program that has an in-person 1-2x a year seminars. Or one with an international component.

          This would be something you could crowd source with your peers/managers and then also looking at people on LinkedIn to see where they got their advanced degrees.

  13. Anon

    I just started my own business early this year so I’m on a far more restricted budget this year. I am looking for ways to save money overall on gifts etc so would love to hear any and all suggestions. My gift giving crowd is my immediate family of husband and two older teens (one in HS one in college) plus my two adult sisters.

    On a lighter note, and maybe related to the sister gifts, I would like some recommendations for reasonably priced candles I can buy online. I prefer vanilla/cinnamon/apple/pumpkin spice type scents right now, and by the end of this month will prefer pine scents. I burned up all my good candles at the begging of shelter in place so I’m down to none. Must be able to buy online – I’m not going to stores unless absolutely necessary.

    • Sal

      You and your husband should just give each other token gifts this year at a very modest price cap that you both agree on together or buy one thing for the two of you that you both agree on and wrap it an put it under the tree.

      • Cat

        I commented below but this is a really good idea. When DH and I were on a very limited budget (law school and clerking) we decided to get ourselves a slow cooker for Christmas. We had W-S wrap it and everything :)

    • Cat

      Your kids are old enough to understand this. Tell them you have a lower budget this year and ask them to prioritize accordingly with their wish list – like if they want a pricey thing (whatever ‘pricey’ means to your budget), that’s their only gift, not their “main” gift.

      If there’s a specific style you know you want to buy someone, bookmark it to check back for sales. I have no idea how JCrew is even keeping their own deals straight – stuff bounces from 50% off to 25% off plus extra 20% off, to random markdowns, every few days.

    • Anon

      Thanks to those who have responded so far! I am more looking for specific inexpensive gift suggestions that people will really appreciate! The kids know the budget is smaller. Husband and I are “saving” the things we will need for our household anyway to give as gifts to each other.

      I am also serious about candles that are great if you have specific suggestions!

      • Cat

        Oh just wait a few weeks- the blogosphere will be chock full of “Great gifts under $25” or “Great stocking stuffers” in no time flat :)

    • Anonymous

      I love books as a gift! FugGirls on Instagram has lots of great recommendations

    • Anonymous

      Our families have done a variety of different things during downturns to keep things festive but not expensive. My sisters and I agreed to exchange Christmas ornaments, my husband’s family did express dollar limits. They also did a year where everyone exchanged hand made things. As the distinctly non-crafty member of the tribe I made coffee liqueur.

  14. AK

    How do you organize your (1) makeup samples and (2) pads/tampons/pantyliners? I have never in my life thought about the latter before, but I keep them in a small cupboard thing in the bottom of a secretary desk (random) and they’re inconvenient to get to and are always falling out of their packages onto the floor, etc. I do like to have a lot on hand (don’t want to be without them if I need them, and the bigger packages are a better value). I don’t have any room in our bathroom cabinets, unfortunately.

    • Anon

      Just reorganized by bathroom. (1) I threw away all my makeup samples. I have realized that if I don’t use something immediately when I get it, and if it isn’t something that will be useful for traveling, I’m not using it. (2) My pads/tampons/pantiliners kept getting pushed into the back of a cupboard, and I could never find what I needed– also kept thinking I was out of stuff I wasn’t. I took over a whole drawer in my (shared) bathroom for them and relegated other bathroom items to the cupboard. These drawers are normally shared space with me and DH, but I thought this was a better use of the space… and also helped DH understand exactly how much space they take up.

    • Cat

      On (2) I keep them in the linen closet that’s next to the bathroom when not on my period. During that time I just plop the box right on top of the toilet. Attractive? No, but way easier than remembering to grab what I think I might need.

      For the samples, if I haven’t used them within a week or so of receipt, I’m clearly not very into it so I toss them.

    • Vicky Austin

      What’s in your bathroom cabinets that you can’t keep your pads et al there? I’d reconsider that before anything else.

      Short of that, when we briefly lived in a house where the toilet was in its own little room, I used to put the boxes in a basket that tucked in the corner. I’d have put a lid on it if I had one (or cared that much).

    • Anonymous

      What’s in your bathroom cabinets that you can’t keep your pads et al there? I’d reconsider that before anything else.

      Short of that, when we briefly lived in a house where the toilet was in its own little room, I used to put the boxes in a basket that tucked in the corner. I’d have put a lid on it if I had one (or cared that much).

    • anon

      I bought pads that came in a box one time. They fit all in a single row and I keep the box on its side (opening facing the door) in a cabinet, with a box of tampons and package of liners on top. Now whenever I buy more, I just refill the box.

      My mom used to use a little treasure chest she bought at Ross or some similar place. It fit on the back of the toilet and held almost a week’s worth of pads & tampons. She kept the extras in their packages under the sink.

    • Anon

      I bought those clear plastic organizers like you can get at Home Goods (I think they’re meant for refrigerator organization) and use them for my makeup and feminine supplies. They fit perfectly in a shelved free standing cabinet (with doors) I have in my bathroom. I also keep a handful of the feminine stuff in a drawer close to the toilet, because … ya know.

      I go through my makeup and skincare samples occasionally while I’m watching TV and look at expiration dates. I ask myself honestly whether I will ever use them. If so, I try to put them into my rotation for the next few weeks, introducing only one at a time so that I can evaluate them, and also in case I’m allergic or sensitive to them. I make exceptions for body products and cleansers because I can typically tolerate all of them.

      The stuff I will never use I throw away or give away depending on whether it’s expired (or close to) or fresh.

      For giving away, back in the before times, I brought a large ziplock of samples to the office, put it in the bathroom with a “help yourself” stickie, and it was all gone by the end of the day.

    • Anonymous

      What is in your bathroom that you don’t have room for bathroom essentials? Pads and tampons live in the bathroom. Move stuff around and figure it out.

    • Anonymous

      I sort the samples into ziploc baggies and label the baggies with a Sharpie. Then put them in a freebie Benefit make up tote. That way they are easy to access for travel.

    • Anon

      I keep them in cream colored cloth baskets in the guest closet. (They’re maybe 12″ long by 8″ wide by 8″ deep and from Wal Mart a decade ago.) I’ve lived in lots of places and the basket system works for me. Sometimes I have a linen closet, sometimes I don’t, but the baskets keep everything organized – extra bars of soap, hair products that I only need sometimes, travel products, etc. I think I have five baskets.

    • Anon

      You need to rethink your bathroom priorities, I can’t imagine a scenario where you can’t keep tampons in your bathroom.

    • Anon

      All the misc stuff like this in my bathroom is packed in ziplocs in a few stacked plastic bins with lids (large shoebox size). The ziplocs keep similar things together, but are still see through, and since they’re soft, things pack together better than putting everything in boxes. They also prevent messes if anything happens to leak.

    • Anon

      I put tampons in a canister with a lid and they’re in the bathroom cabinet until I need them at which point they sit either on the back of the toilet or on the counter for a few days.

    • Silly Valley

      I’ve got a linen closet near the bathroom where I keep tampons, pads, and those stick on heating pads. They’re in a plastic bin I got from Ikea ages ago. While I’m using them the bin lives on the floor next to the toilet.

    • Cat

      Some of y’all have never lived in a city apartment with a pedestal sink, toilet, and stall shower – medicine cabinet being the only storage – and it shows :)

      • Anon

        Haha i have the same setup (old house) but I was able to squeeze in two narrow free standing cabinets. Nothing like the huge linen closets in modern houses, but it helps.

    • anon

      I have a rectangular metal (german cookie) tin on the back of the toilet for my tampons etc. I refill it PERIODICALLY (HAHA GET IT???) from the main packages that I keep in the bathroom closet or under the sink.

    • LaurenB

      I am always tucking my feet under me when I’m at home, so I think the sequins would be uncomfortable and last about five minutes.

  16. Anonymous

    On topic, I clean and organize when I am stressed out, so I gave myself permission to spend the day on that. So far I have reorganized the laundry room, done some laundry, and ordered our next batch of cleaning products for pickup later. My husband is in the yard hacking at things. We will check screens later.

  17. Anon

    Guy just got arrested right outside my apartment. One of the guys in my building walked by and yelled “DON’T TALK TO THEM, SIR.” Found the public defender….The guy did stop talking, and the cops were visibly unhappy about that.

    Also, one of the cops saw me watching from my window (inside, not recording, in no way bothering them) and made the “Go away” signal. No can do, bro. Police in my city haven’t shown themselves to be trustworthy at any point ever so I was watching that one through- regardless of what the guy is accused of doing, the cop response seemed like serious overkill that could go sideways really fast.

      • Anon

        That’s not kind. If something like this happened outside my window I’d be kind of shook too, and wanting to share it with someone.

        OP, your eyes on this may have prevented a worse outcome for the arrested person, so good for you for being there.

        • Anon

          Yes, it was just an event in what’s already a charged day and I wanted to share.

    • Panda Bear

      Awww, I miss living in the city. Nothing exciting happens outside the windows in my little town. Anyway, good for you! Keep an eye out.

      • Anon

        LOL I can list things that aren’t fun about living in the city if that would help!

    • Jules

      You did the right thing! I might even have videotaped it. (No one would know George Floyd’s name if his killing hadn’t been on video.)

  18. Anon

    Is anyone else climbing up a wall? There is no way I will be able to sleep tonight.

Back to Top

About

Work with Corporette®

Serious Stuff

work fashion blog press mentions