Would You Wear Nude-For-You Fishnet Tights?

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I was intrigued a few years ago when I saw that M.M.LaFleur was selling “sheer opaque tights” for, essentially, people who want the look of pantyhose but the durability of tights. Interestingly, the options have only multiplied since, so I thought it might be an interesting Coffee Break discussion.

Particularly this winter, when you're just dressing for yourself and probably doing so in a more casual way, are tights playing a bigger role? Are you intrigued by the idea of nude-for-you tights or even nude fishnets?

Truthfully, the product that caught my eye was these fishnets, from a company called Nude Barre. I have personally avoided fishnets for years (especially since readers strongly opined that fishnets are not acceptable for conservative offices), but fishnets do have a lot to recommend them if you're in a more casual space.

They're often more durable, harder to rip, and easier to pull on, and they add just a slight color to your regular legs. From far away, nude-for-you fishnet tights probably do look a bit like hose, but up close they just look textured and a little bit cool. In fall and spring, for those weird days when neither bare legs nor tights are acceptable, fishnets fill the gap. They also can be a great option if you're wondering what color tights to wear with a navy skirt.

In any event, I'm intrigued to see multiple colors of beige fishnets — pictured are caramel, tapioca cream, and ivory cream; they're available in sizes XS-XXL for $33 at Shopbop.

The brand also makes opaque tights in five different skin tones, and Commando is also in the game with “sheer tights” and black and “buff” fishnet tights.

If you're looking for darker skin tones, Nubian Skin offers some sheer tights, as does Etsy seller Sheer Chemistry.

Readers, what are your thoughts — would you wear nude-for-you fishnet tights?

Update: Nude-for-you fishnet tights, fleece pantyhose, and other sheer tights are making a comeback in 2025!

Sales of note for 1/31/25:

  • Ann Taylor – Suiting Event – 30% off suiting + 30% off tops
  • Nordstrom – Cashmere on sale; AllSaints, Free People, Nike, Tory Burch, and Vince up to 60%; beauty deals up to 25% off
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20 off your $100+ purchase
  • Boden – 15% off new season styles
  • Eloquii – 60% off 100s of styles
  • J.Crew – Up to 40% off winter layers
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off sweaters and pants
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – End of season clearance, extra 70% off markdown tops + extra 60% off all other markdowns

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

165 Comments

  1. Can anyone recommend a toner and a moisturizer for somewhat oily, acne-prone skin? I have been using the LaRoche Posay toner, which seemed to make me break out worse, and the Cetaphil moisturizer, which I like as a sunscreen but not an every day lotion – it’s a little too heavy. I’d like to spend under $40 on each of them.

    1. I’ve been using a moisturizer from The Ordinary that has worked decently for me. It’s not heavy or greasy, but feels like it’s sinking in.

      1. I use the Cera-Ve “night” moisturizer am and pm and apply separate sunscreen.

        1. I switched to this approach (CeraVe pm used both at night and in the morning; a separate sunscreen in the AM, plus Vit. C serum every other day) just a few weeks ago based heavily on recommendations from this board. I like CeraVe. It’s the right balance between too heavy and too light.

    2. I really like Son & Park’s Beauty Water for a toner, and I’ve been using Neutrogena’s Hydro-Boost Water Gel moisturizer.

    3. Get the niacinimide + zinc serum from the Ordinary and use that in place of a toner. For moisturizer use Neutrogena Hydroboost for sensitive skin (this is the best version because it’s fragrance free.) I promise you that you will see results with this.

      You might consider adding an exfoliant at night – I like CosRx blackhead liquid, which is a basic, effective BHA.

      1. Also, wear a sunscreen on top of the serum + moisturizer during the day. Many people like Elta UV Clear for this.

    4. It depends on your skin, but for my oily/acne prone skin sunblock + moisturizer was more than enough. I like the Mizon snail gel cream, and the Missha safe block aqua sun gel. Fwiw, Missha is having a 40% off sale on their entire site right now – their red algae essence is a new fave of mine if you really do want a toner too.

    5. Paula’s Choice Calm toner – calms redness, feels moisturizing. Cerave Blue cream, Hada Labo Hyaluronic Lotion 1 or plumping gel, Purito Centella Unscentes SPF or LRP Toleriane Tinted cream.

  2. Help! I am dried out! Flakes visible on my forehead, nose, and cheeks. Now flakes in and around my hair line. I’m in South Florida so inside with air conditioning most of the time. Late 30s, very pale, zero skincare routine, not much budget but this is not okay as is.

    I scrub with a washcloth in the shower when I hair wash every 2-3 days and feel soft for 12 hrs, then flakes return.

    Help!

    1. I would stop doing the wash cloth for a few showers and see if that helps. (Source: I tried doing the wash cloth thing in lieu of harsh exfoliating scrubs and it was just as bad for my sensitive skin as the scrubs had been.)

    2. If zero skincare means not even any moisturizer, than literally any moisturizing will help. For low budget, try Nivea (dark blue jar, at any drugstore or grocery store). If your only goal is to get rid of the flakes, that should do it.

    3. Is your skin actually dry, or is it just not exfoliating itself well? Scrubbing with a washcloth sounds super harsh and like it might be counterproductive. When I passed 35, I needed to start using a gentle chemical exfoliant. I thought my skin was dry because it was flaking, but the skin underneath was super moist: because of aging, I just wasn’t shedding dead skin cells as seamlessly, and that’s where the flakes were coming from.

    4. Don’t scrub so hard. You’re probably making your skin more irritated and more likely to produce more flakes.

      Use products for sensitive skin and wear aquaphor as your last step at night.

    5. Wait, so you don’t use anything? Please please use a gentle moisturizer and sunblock daily – especially in Florida!
      As I mentioned above – Missha pure block aqua sun gel is on amazon but cheaper on the Missha site. That and any moisturizer (I like Mizon snail cream since it’s light and sinks in, but the Neutrogena hyrdo boost water gel is basically a more expensive version in drugstores).

  3. Looking for soft and comfy sweatpants for men…must be loose at the ankle (not elastic).

    1. What about any sweats anywhere and just snip the ankle so there’s no tight elastic? Might be easiest and thus can be found for probably $10 just about anywhere selling clothes.

    2. Target sells some in their PJ section. All the men in my household (husband, teen son) wear them all the time.

    3. Champion, the old school 90’s style ones, are still available on the Champion site, Walmart, Amazon, etc. I too was looking for NOT joggers and kicked myself for not even thinking of the brand sooner. Like $20-$30 depending on size/color/sales.

  4. What are you seeing in your cities/towns in terms of mask-wearing on trails and bike paths (e.g., paths that are not always wide/easy to distance on)? I’ve noticed that more people are wearing masks now, but that a couple of groups, particularly bikers, seem to be generally not using them, even though we have to pass with less than six feet of distance. While I believe the risk of outdoor transmission even without masks is low, it’s also getting frustrating to have to step off the path into the bushes to not get a huge blast of air from a runner or a biker breathing hard going by. I avoid crowded areas, of course, but it’s really nice when we’re all in the mask-wearing thing together.

    1. Large Texas city here. Generally see people with masks available (e.g., around their neck, easy to pull up) on trails where you run into people but not wearing 100% of the time. People riding bikes are generally not wearing masks although they are generally not near other people for any amount of time. I’ve seen some neighborhood walkers wearing masks consistently, but most people just cross to the other side of the street to avoid people. Virtually no one running in the neighborhood with a mask on (again, able to distance away from people). Don’t really see the lack of masks as a political statement but more during the summer as running in 95F (as opposed to the gym) is hard enough to not pass out in, without adding a mask. Seeing more mask wearing as the temperature is not an imminent threat.

      1. Midwest college town with a mask mandate, and same. Most people are not wearing masks outdoors but many have them available just in case. This is not a battle to fight, IMO. People still dining indoors and traveling and gathering in large groups? That ticks me off a lot more than a runner with whom I have very, very limited contact.

        1. I think that if runners aren’t going to wear masks, they have an obligation to run in non-crowded areas and at non-peak times. It’s kind of gross to see a young man running and breathing hard with no mask while passing children, families, and the elderly who are all wearing masks.

          1. Children have been shown not to be widely affected by COVID, so please don’t use children as a fig leaf for your fears here. Elderly I’ll give you, but “won’t somebody please think of the children?” is both hysteria and incorrect here.

      2. Chicago suburbs. I don’t see bikers wearing masks, but they typically have them around their necks in case they need to stop and will be close to people. Mixed bags on runners. People who are walking in areas where they can easily avoid others (such as on suburban streets, walking the dog, etc.) seem not to wear masks, but if they are walking up to a strip mall or similar, put masks on. In general, people give one another wide berth in public settings even if the “moment of passing” is just a few seconds. Since the pandemic began — and we were an early mask mandate states — I have seen exactly 2 people I thought were real flouters — one man in a grocery store (who had all kinds of whack job stickers on his truck and probably had guns) and one man in a mom-and-pop-coffee shop. I think it’s generally pretty high mask compliance. Of course, there are still people – and by people I mean morons — having parties and what-not, but since I’m not invited (yay!!) I don’t see it.

    2. There is statistically almost no evidence that a runner going by can transmit COVID to you. In my area, runners largely do not wear masks, and we have very low transmission. You need sustained contact to transmit COVID.

      1. An absence of evidence is not evidence of absence, though. Intuitively, I think you are likely right, but we lack solid data on outdoor transmission within six feet while breathing hard. If anyone knows of any, I’m all ears – I could have missed something.

    3. In Texas, biggest city, almost no masking outdoors in parks, on city trails, or in neighborhoods. Off the trails, most people make an effort to stay away from one another, on trails, people seem to figure “I’m passing quickly, there is no harm” and pass way too close (as in within two or three feet)- it’s my biggest pet peeve right now. However, there is consistent masking indoors. I have common sense and so don’t go to restaurants to eat in so do not know what is going on there.

    4. I am pretty strict about mask-wearing and always wear one outdoors or if anyone is in my apartment, *except* when I go running. I tried running once with a mask and it was really unenjoyable. I am in NYC and run by the river (I live two blocks away). I aim to go no later than 6:30 am to beat the crowds, and I maintain the max distance I can from others while I’m running and turn my head away if we pass close by. I do carry a disposable mask, but I rarely put it on once I’m outside my lobby, unless I’m walking, or there is a crowd, or if someone near me seems really nervous (so they’d appreciate my mask) or sloppy (so my dander goes up). The other people who run and bike at this hour seem to do the same. I think realistically, the fraction of a second that someone’s air passes over you is highly unlikely to result in infection…even though people may be breathing heavily, it’s a very short interaction (one breath max), you’re outdoors, and you’re probably not within six feet of each other. Most of the air you’re feeling is the vacuum their body creates, not their breath itself. That said, if the numbers keep ticking up, maybe my calculus or timing will change to reduce risk further.

      1. I’m just not sure if it’s “highly unlikely” though. It’s one thing to pass outdoors >six feet away, but it just doesn’t ring true to me that a runner passing within six feet while breathing heavily (especially if you’re going opposite directions) isn’t risky. How is it really different from being indoors with someone briefly when you factor in the hard breathing/lack of space? I wish we had more data.

    5. Where I live (mask mandate in effect for the whole pandemic), most people are wearing masks on trails, even kids and even when hiking or running up mountains at elevation. Everyone at least puts a mask on when they approach others, but many wear masks the entire time. It’s not comfortable and it’s not the most high risk situation (since there’s no extended contact and it’s outdoors), but it’s still the safe (and required!) thing to do.

  5. Help please. My husband was just diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes, or I’m guessing he will be today or tomorrow. He got his most recent test results last night — an A1c well above threshold — and it was quite the shock. His A1c has trended well below 5.7 as recently as last summer, and of course because of covid he didn’t go back for a physical until last month.

    Neither of us got sleep last night, we’re obviously quite upset, and thinking about what this means for our future. Anyone able to talk me off the ledge? I am a complete wreck, and so is he. He’s late 30s, we have kids… I’m heartbroken.

    1. Hey, I understand that this is heartbreaking, but please know there is hope and you will get through this. Many, many people live happy fulfilling lives with type 2 diabetes. It has to be carefully managed and the way you eat as a family will probably have to change slightly, but this is going to be okay.

    2. What does the doctor say?

      Is he overweight? Does he get any exercise? Does it run in his family?

      I know several people who have wiped away their type 2 diabetes with dietary changes and modest exercise (i.e. Walking!). This is manageable. You have time. You learn.

      You will be fine.

      Decreasing stress is also good for blood sugar!

      I strongly recommend getting hooked in with a diabetes nurse to be available to answer questions as you learn, talk to a nutritionist once for advice, and find an online diabetes type 2 forum for day to day questions and angst.

      You both will be fine. And your entire family will be more healthy as you fold In simple changes to your daily meals and routine.

    3. My grandmother lived for almost 30 years with well managed type 2 diabetes. She only needed insulin in the last 5 years.

      If he can commit to the necessary diet and exercise changes – he is likely to have a relatively long and healthy life.

    4. Type 2 diabetes is far from a death sentence! If he can’t get it under control w/ diet and exercise, there are medications and insulin. It’s probably one of the most common diseases in the US. Maybe if you share some of your specific concerns, people with more experience can give you info.

    5. Type 2 diabetes can play out really differently for different people, so you don’t know yet what this means for your husband. I would also be feeling scared and upset. But some people do manage to get their A1Cs back down, so I think the first thing to do is to work with the doctor to come up with a plan for keeping blood sugars within range going forward. I would not worry about worst case scenarios before trying continuous blood glucose monitoring or the equivalent level of finger prick testing to see exactly what’s going on hour to hour; it’s a lot easier to manage blood glucose on a day to day basis than A1C every several months, and it could be that his next A1C will be looking a lot better if there are any levers left to pull in terms of diet and activity levels; you just need the plan.

    6. Over type 2 diabetes? Which is common and has tons of effective treatment options? This doesn’t need to mean anything for your future except him monitoring what he eats. This level of panic seems really extreme.

      1. Exactly. Her last paragraph is something that would be appropriate for a cancer diagnosis.

        Yes, this is scary, but it’s normal. Diet, exercise, and medication will help tremendously. Both of my grandfathers had Type 2 diabetes; one lived until 84 and the other until 89.

    7. Why are you heartbroken? It’s an easy fix. It’s a lifestyle disease, so he just needs to make some healthier choices. Exercise, diet, maybe some medication. No need to be a complete wreck about it.

    8. With all due respect, get a grip. This is not a death sentence, type 2 diabetes is extremely common and manageable, and even type 1 is very treatable. Two people I’m very close to have Type 1 diabetes and were diagnosed as children (see: nothing you can do about it – not from diet/exercise) and have lived very normal lives and have no real complications other than more regular doctor appointments.

      This is not a death sentence and you need to calm down and speak with his doctor.

      1. Wow, you’re terrible. Diagnoses of any sort can be scary and overwhelming and it doesn’t help to have a horrible person like you telling someone to “get a grip.” Did you really need to make this comment? Do you really feel good about yourself for being this much of a jerk?

        Type 2 diabetes and type 1 are totally different.

        1. OP, kindly and way more gently than the OP if this mini-thread, I do agree with the sentiment. I think with some education and talking to doctors you’ll find that there are a lot of avenues that include a long, fulfilling, healthy life for your husband.

          FWIW, I could have written the post about the recent diagnosis of DH but it’s true. He’s flirted with pre-diabetes pre pandemic and he’s fully let himself go during pandemic . We’re legit waiting for the doctor to call for the formal diagnosis. We’re young – not quite 40 with little kids. With modification to lifestyle and diet he’ll be of the meds in no time. This was the gigantic wake up call he needed (his words).

          You got this. This is hugely well researched and there are resources galore. If you want an illness, you want one with droves of money and smart people focused on it.

        1. I think this is the point she is making. So many people live full, healthy, normal lives with type 1 diabetes, which is often more challenging to treat than type 2 which also usually hits during childhood.

      2. It shortens your lifespan and puts you and not insignificant risk for kidney disease, heart disease and nerve damage. It’s not a death sentence but it’s also not NBD, it’s a serious disease.

    9. I’m really sorry you and your husband are going through this.

      Do you have someone outside of your husband to vent to? I think in this situation, the best thing you can do is be there and be as strong as you can for your husband as much as is humanly possible, so having someone else’s shoulder to cry on would be good for you. And once you have medical input, maybe figuring out some good recipes for some of his favorite foods which are compliant with his dietary needs?

    10. We went through this in the first quarter of 2019. DH was given 90 days to make a change.

      We cut out all carbs for the first 60 days. No pasta, no potatoes, no bread. No alcohol.

      We ate lean proteins and lots of vegetables. Chips were replaced with carrots. Yogurt replaced breakfast sandwiches; cold brew coffee at home replaced iced coffee with syrup.

      When he went back at 90 days, his A1C wa below 3 and he had dropped over 30 pounds.

      While the last several months haven’t been kind, his A1C has stayed down. That functioned as a reset of his endocrine system to be able to regulate better.

    11. I understand this is shocking and stressful to you and your husband. However, type 2 diabetes is very, very common and manageable. Please don’t freak out. He may not even be insulin dependent if he can manage it with diet and exercise. He will be ok and live a perfectly normal life with you and your children. Signed, one of the few non-type 2 diabetics in my family.

      1. This. While stressful, this is not a life-ending diagnosis. It’s a wake up call.

    12. I’m sorry, this sounds super stressfull.

      If you want some anectdata, the people I know who has gotton diabetes as adults have done very well with lifestyle changes. In my native language, diabetes has traditionally had the name “the sugar illness”, and dietary changes has been the biggest thing helping people avoid long-term medication. That can be very hard work, but it’s also a long term effort because the future prospects can genuinely be very, very long term. Any lifestyle changes you make as a family to help manage his diabetes will most likely also make your family as a whole healthier. You can do this.

    13. woah, deep breaths. diabetes can be very well managed these days. many people benefit greatly from lifestyle changes (exercise, diet change, weight loss) – not saying that those aren’t sometimes really challenging. in addition, the ways people can use insulin are vastly improved. this doesnt apply to everyone but my mom has managed to stay off insulin for years due to serious diet and exercise changes. i was diagnosed as pre diabetic as a teen and have worked hard to get my a1c into a normal range without insulin use.

    14. While diabetes is certainly something to take seriously, it is not the death sentence you are envisioning here. What it means for your future? He’ll have to learn how to manage it with diet, exercise and medications. There’s no need to be a “complete wreck” over it. I wish you peace!

    15. I’m from the UK, where Dr Michael Mosley is well known for devising a Mediterranean, restricted calorie diet to reverse diabetes. Tons of success stories. Google him, and check out his Blood Sugar diet, and the Fast 800 books.

  6. Ugh, unemployment is asking for more ID info but they categorize the request as fraud because it is fraud prevention. I know this logically but seeing fraud listed makes me panic. Of course, I can’t reach a person to get my questions answered or solve the problem. Calls just say to try another time, it’s too busy. No one needs this extra anxiety!

    1. Huh? They are just trying to make sure it is you. They are not looking to nab you for fraud.

    2. Ugh I feel you! I started a new job this year and had 30 days to pick an insurance plan. A few days in, I got a”confirmation” of my selection to waive everything! This was just some kind of default message, and I was able to pick my plan in the end, but this was a stupid default message to send out!

  7. What are your favorite thanksgiving recipes? Looking for turkey recipes but also sides and recipes for leftover turkey!

    1. Alton Brown’s Good Eats brined turkey is the best I’ve ever made. Very juicy and tasty, and relatively easy to do (just have to prep and place in the brine overnight). We live in Chicago and use a 5 gallon bucket from Home Depot to hold the turkey in the brine – we just use a cookie sheet with some bricks on top to cover it overnight – either on our balcony or in our garage.
      https://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/good-eats-roast-turkey-recipe-1950271

      I always make too much on purpose and then spend that Saturday making turkey dumplings with homemade noodles. Very similar to this recipe: https://www.spendwithpennies.com/old-fashioned-chicken-and-dumplings/

    2. For leftover turkey I love making a pot pie with it and other sides like carrots and green beans!

    3. The only recipe for leftover turkey is … turkey! In turkey sandwiches, hot or cold! It’s so good I don’t see a need to have to eat it anyway other than as it is.

      1. Turkey sandwich on Black Friday, which is pajama day at my house, is my favorite meal of the year.

  8. Anyone feel like your views on friends have changed over Covid? My friend sells hospice (they make sales calls on nursing homes and doc offices). She and the reps under her gets rapid tests. If it’s positive but they don’t have symptoms, she tells them to keep making calls (company policy). And she thinks this is reasonable as long as they are masked. I’m horrified. She recently tested positive and said she was sure it was wrong because she didn’t have symptoms and “is super cautious”–but has been flying, having in-person meetings and eating indoors at restaurants in the destination state (republican state with little restriction) within the past two weeks. She goes on and on about how the economy needs to open up more. We’re in a state where hospital bed capacity record highs and gov is saying we’re in crisis and pleading for folks to stay home. The neighboring state 20 min from us is treating folks in tents. I just feel so bad for these nursing home operators who would have no idea that the person meeting with them is positive. We’ve been friends for like 20 years and I’ve always thought she was a good person. But this is feeling like a difference that’s just so big that I don’t see how I can have the same respect for her ever again.

      1. This. This is flat our horrifying behavior and I’d be very tempted to make an anonymous report to your state health department.

    1. I would stop associating with this person and possibly even report her to the governing body for her profession, if I could figure out what that governing body was.

      1. At least in my state, hospices are licensed by the same state agency that licenses other healthcare facilities like hospitals, nursing homes, etc.
        I’d also wonder exactly what her company policy says- are these people who have tested positive, waited their required 10 days or whatever, and otherwise meet the return to work criteria? Return to work criteria are different for healthcare personnel, although I’d bet that sales teams aren’t necessarily healthcare personnel.

    2. This is crazy pants. I thought you meant she was having her positive employees continue to work remotely if they were positive but healthy. It’s nuts that she and her employees are meeting people in person when they are positive. People like her are why we are where we are. So selfish.

      As Space Karen has proven – the rapid tests have limited reliability

    3. You can’t. But she also might have been a good person before — I do think the culture around people can change them (for the better, or like in this case for the worse).

      1. She said the company’s policy complies with CDC guidance. I don’t see any guidance and am digging. The masks she said are properly fit N95. But I can’t imagine the CDC is saying “here folks, go out after testing positive so long as you wear an N95.” And though she fancies herself working in healthcare, she is a sales person–not anyone where you could justify it being essential to be face to face with anyone under any wildly possible circumstance. I know the rapid tests aren’t very reliable. But it just doesn’t make any sense to me why you wouldn’t isolate–at least until you could get a negative with one of the tests that takes a few days. I feel like I’m crazy. Our other friend was on the text and didn’t seem to think this was an issue either. I usually try to avoid drama. But I think this is friendship ending.

        1. N95 protects the wearer only. It’s a one way valve — out. This is horrifying.

          1. That is not true. You are talking about vented N95s, which is one small subset. Regular, non-vented N95s protect both.

          2. That is not true. You are talking about vented N95s, which is one small subset. Regular, non-vented N95s protect both.

    4. She is a bad person and I would stop being friends with her. I would report her to the nursing home operators immediately. Her actions will literally cause a very high-risk population to die at greater rates.

    5. She is a sociopath and a bad person. As a person with a mother who works in a nursing home that currently has an outbreak, I am super infuriated by your friends’ behavior. Your friend who thinks she knows better than the COVID test could easily infect people who are ACTUALLY being cautious, like my mother. I have a few choice words for your friend, and frankly, none of them are kind.

    6. Usually when I see posts about thinking less of friends over COVID it’s something like someone eating at a restaurant and seeing friends occasionally and I roll my eyes, but this is crazypants. She tells people with a POSITIVE test to keep going into locations with vulnerable populations. That is sociopathic or at least insanely selfish.

    7. For perspective, I think that the economy should open up more, and I am furious over the insane way that people have treated this virus. However, your friend is being a POS. A positive test plus interacting with high risk populations means that she needs to sit her fanny home until a second test confirms that she’s cleared the virus from her system, full stop.

      If you feel like approaching her about it, here’s my script: “Leslie, this is NOT me telling you to wear a mask while you do laps around an empty track. I’m not telling you that you’re a crap person if you go visit your 90 year old grandmother because she really wants to have you around on what could be her last Christmas. I’m not telling you that you’re a crap person if you think schools should have an in-person option and a virtual option. I am, however, telling you that ***going into a nursing home*** AFTER ***a positive COVID-19 test*** is completely inexcusable. Your company requires you to get those tests so that you can do your job safely, and part of that is keeping your butt at home if the test is positive. This isn’t a ‘kill the economy’ requirement; this is basic human decency. This is complete garbage.”

      1. +1 I’m far less conservative than many on this board but this person is objectively terrible. This isn’t a difference in risk tolerance, she’s literally knowingly exposing people

    8. One thing I’ve said (twice ever) in situations where I’m absolutely horrified by someone’s selfish actions when they’re looking for validation is to say, “I find that shocking” without much further elaboration (a simple “I feel quite differently” or “I disagree” suffices if they push back. Explaining more just makes them more defensive). Then I can feel I’ve said my piece without it blowing up, and I’ve moved on from my relationship with both of them. They won’t change, but I can at least calmly state that it’s not okay.

      1. That would be a good response in many situations but in this case, I’d blow that bridge up on my way out of that friendship. She is literally risking killing people by doing this and I’d tell her exactly what I thought of her with not a hesitation in the world. I don’t care if she gets defensive, because I’d tell her and then block her immediately before she can respond. She knows the risks and she’s doing it anyway.

        And yes, I’d also report her to every single person I can think of up and down the chain. Screenshot anything she told you. Send in proof that she is putting people who are already vulnerable at significant risk. Destroy her. She deserves it.

        She is not a good person. She is a terrible, terrible, terrible person.

    9. That is horrendous, reckless, irresponsible, you name it. Yeah, I would stop being friends with this person. What a breach of trust between her company and the nursing home operators.

    10. People will die because of her. Tell her you find her disregard of this horrific, report her company to the department of health, and cut her out of your life.

    11. There are at least two people who I’ve dropped from friendship. I’ll be cordial if in person, but cannot see them in a positive light ever again. But these friends aren’t in the “I’m ignorant or brainwashed to believe things are fine” but rather fall in the “I fully acknowledge the seriousness of what is happening and I do not care” group, so I feel no remorse about kicking them to the curb.

    12. I had to read that sentence about her reps twice. Holy sh!t.

      If you report her to her company now, it’ll be for her own good and theirs. If someone manages to trace a nursing home infection to her or her reps – not sure if it’s possible, but maybe – she’d be rightfully destroyed professionally and there’d be press coverage. If my loved one were to be affected as a result, I’d pursue legal action if possible (IANAL).

    13. I would legitimately report her and her company to the governing body of whatever governs the product she sells, to local news outlets (report her company not her name), and blast her on social networks with common friends. She is literally endangering people’s lives in a direct fashion. I think of this as the equivalent of knowingly drinking and driving, killing someone in an accident, then saying “they shouldn’t have been on the road at night”

    14. Wow. Your friend is awful and endangering the nursing home residents and the nursing home staff. Report them or sound the alarm if possible. She is recklessly and carelessly endangering people.

    15. Most nursing homes have a little questionnaire you fill out before they let you in. Have you got a cough? Have you tested positive for COV19? Have you… blah blah blah. What does she put on these things? Lies? Then make some phone calls. Report her to the medical board or hospice company she represents. I’m sure that her boss doesn’t want to be known as a super-spreader. Bad for business at the very least.

  9. As someone with some tactile things, the idea of fishnets on my toes makes me want to go into the fetal position in the corner. Seriously. I envy all who can wear those or non inside out socks or just any shoes with any inner soles. True envy.

    1. Nude fishnets had a once or twice a year use in the Before Times if I went to a fancy event but it was 10 degrees outside and it would look stupid with bare legs. They have absolutely no use in the Now Times. They are resting comfortably in a drawer.

    2. Some of them have a solid toe. I dislike holes on my toes because my toe ends up wriggling through it. If I’m wearing boots, I’ll wear thin socks under my fishnet tights.

    1. I love Molly Yeh’s recipes! We are going to make that too. So much better than green beans.

  10. I am looking for books like “Big Little Lies”, “Happy and You Know It”, or “Such a Fun Age”. Anyone have recommendations?

    1. Ooh ooh! The Gifted School. Reminded me A LOT of Big Little Lies. Bruce Holsinger.

      1. And really, all of Liane Moriarity’s oeuvre is really enjoyable if you like that kind of thing.

    2. So, modern, light-ish, non-literary fiction, likely marketed to women, that aren’t romance or thriller/mysteries? I’d go down the list of Reese Witherspoons book club and filter out romance and mysteries. Other suggestions:
      I’ve liked all Liane Moriarty aside from her latest (Nine Perfect Strangers). Curtis Sittenfeld is wonderful— I LOVED Rodham. Meg Wolitzer is another author to look for. From other authors, you might like The Gifted School, A Good Neighborhood, Where the Crawdads Sing, Something in the Water, Charlotte Walsh Likes to Win, This Is How It Always Is, and Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine.

      1. Yes, I have been enjoying lighter reads lately, especially juicy books about groups of affluent women doing affluent women things. I am kind of tired of heavy books. This is a helpful list. Thank you!

      2. I forgot one, The bookish life of Nina Hill is definitely more romance novel but had a much more substantial feel, it wasn’t just about the “HEA” (happily ever after).

      3. So this is my genre, and this is an excellent list. Love Liane Moriarty, but definitely skip Nine Perfect Strangers.

    3. I mean, I agree with the below suggestions to scroll through Libby/your library app for new/popular releases. I’ve read and liked the following recently: Daisy Jones & the Six, The Love Story of Missy Carmichael (not a romance, promise), Plain Bad Heroines, An Absolutely Remarkable Thing, The Vanishing Half, a Man Called Ove, Anxious People, City of Girls, The Boys Club, Beach Read, or Maybe in Another Life.

    4. I have…a lot. Long comment, but I read a lot of books like this. Tried to think about books that had the same feeling as those 3, rather than similar writing or market. Spans the range from more serious (This is How It Always Is) to absolutely over the top ridiculous (Fitness Junkie).

      Jojo Moyes books other than the Me Before You series (which is good, but definitely a romance)- I liked One Plus One and Paris for One and Other Stories

      Emma Straub’s books. I haven’t read All Adults Here, but The Vacationers and Modern Lovers would both fit the bill. Like the 3 books listed, they all feature families who are essentially normal but there’s some drama.

      Fitness Junkie by Lucy Sykes and Jo Piazza- this is an absolutely ridiculous book that I loved. It’s about a woman who goes TOTALLY OVERBOARD with fitness. Pretty much it’s 5 fancy fitness classes a day back to back, fad diets, juice cleanses, shamans, hallucinogenic hot yoga sans clothing, the whole 9 yards. I laughed so hard I cried reading it.

      Some of Jodi Picoult’s newer stuff- the older stuff is pretty predictable, but I’ve liked her last few. Haven’t read her new one yet. I liked Small Great Things, about a public defender and her client.

      Where’d You Go Bernadette has the same feeling as Big Little Lies to me. I don’t usually like books where the main character is a self-absorbed woman who doesn’t understand why people dislike her (ahem, Eleanor Oliphant) but I liked this one.

      I did not like Liane Moriarty’s most recent book, Nine Perfect Strangers, but all of her other stuff. It’s super forgettable-I don’t remember a single plot element from a few of the books I’ve read by her, but I usually read them in a few days and enjoy them as I’m reading.

      The Crazy Rich Asians series if you haven’t read it.

      The Book of Essie is about the youngest child of a Duggar-like reality show who gets pregnant. Problems ensue.

      This is How It Always Is is most similar to Such a Fun Age- about a family who’s young child is trans. I found it really touching.

      Artemis is by the same guy who wrote The Martian (which I highly recommend), about a woman who lives on the moon and is kind of a rebel against the moon-rules. Not as good as The Martian but I liked it.

      I Am, I Am, I Am is nonfiction but it read like short stories to me. Again, has the most similar feeling to Such a Fun Age- more serious.

      Bringing Down the Duke is totally romance, but I really liked the women’s rights/suffragette elements.

      The Song of Achilles is not about women, it’s about Achilles and Patroclus, but damn it’s good. I liked it more than Circe by the same author.

      Widows of Malabar Hill is a mystery set in 1920s India, about the first woman barrister in Bombay. There’s also a sequel. Great book.

      Almost all of Lisa See’s books, but especially The Island of Sea Women. About the Korean women who dive- really interesting, and I did a ton of googling about them afterwards.

      The Glass Hotel by Emily St John Mandel. It has a different feel than Station Eleven (which I also recommend but maybe not right now…) but has the same solid writing, layered characters, strong sense of place.

      Tear Me Apart is a thriller about a Colorado teen who’s a competitive skier. Most similar to Big Little Lies, and it was less about the thriller than the family dynamics.

      Big Summer by Jennifer Weiner is like Big Little Lies and Happy And You Know It.

      Sea Wife by Amity Gaige- this one is a little bit of an outlier, but I thought it was a really well done novel about the ups and downs of a relationship. Also, I liked the scenery.

      Camille Pagan’s books, but especially This Won’t End Well. Kind of feels like Eleanor Oliphant, but less annoying. About a woman who is having some….life struggles, including that her husband left her for Paris, she lost her job as a scientist after her boss hit on her, and her best friend is now an MLM bossmom who wants to cure her with crystals.

      The Good House is about an older woman who is 100% an alcoholic, but 100% refuses to acknowledge it. She lives in a small town in New England and works as a real estate agent, and her drinking causes her some issues. It’s a great book- I listened on audio and LOVED IT. Perfect narrator.

      A Woman is No Man. It’s certainly on the more serious side, but has some really incredible characters who you really feel for as they navigate the challenges of the immigrant experience.

      The Mother in Law- most similar to Big Little Lies. Family drama + a crime. I read it in one sitting.

      1. Sloan, I am so pleased with your book devotion, but OMG, have you read all of these books? Where in the world do you find the time? Is your boyyfreind OK with your choices? When I tried to read a magazine in bed, my ex would never let me and would inevitably try to distract me, even tho he was a terrible performer.

    5. Check out the Lisa Jewel books….and then she was gone is a good place to start!

    1. Right? I’m wearing leggings right now…which is pretty much I wear to WFH every day.

    2. Me too. But I do love nude fishnets so much more than nude hose in normal times.

      Fun fact, my auto correct just tried to change nude hose to nude Jose, so clearly Siri has been having more fun than I am.

    3. Yeah, what? If I am “just dressing for myself,” the only tights I’m wearing are running tights. As in, for running, not with runs in them.

  11. Where are you all ordering your holiday cards this year? I’d like to do one with a photo on the front and a short pandemic catch-up (we learned how to bake bread, we adopted two kitties, that’s about it) on the back. Normally we’ve used Shutterfly — are there better options out there?

      1. +1 on Minted, pretty options, usually a coupon can upload your mailing list and get envelopes printed by them (it is how they get ya back YOY, however)

    1. I was just thinking about this. We are in a case spike, and I can’t see sending licked mail to my loved ones. I think I am going to do an e-card.

  12. What is the pandemic shoe for winter? Or I suppose the pandemic boot?

    For summer, I wore a pair of thong Birks every day. Fall has been the Rothys sneaker. What is the winter equivalent? Is there an alternative to Uggs? I anticipate wearing them for walks in the park (I do some conference calls this way), picking up groceries, and dropping the kids at school (to the extent there is school…).

    1. I just got the Ugg Kesey and they are not ug and very comfy on my wider feet. Same activities. I wear 7 with nylons and 7.5 with real socks. The 7.5 in these fit snug (like molded to my feet) with my costco wool blend socks. Thus, I might try a half size up for wearing with thick boot socks, but I can’t decide if I’d ever wear them that way since they’re so fuzzy and warm inside already. I used a 15% coupon from Bloomies for app signup, but they’re still quite expensive ($160 orig).

    2. Birkenstocks year round, with seasonally appropriate socks if needed. Covid turned me into an unfashionable monster but my feet feel AMAZING.

  13. I am having a tough time getting used to my firm’s new time and billing software. Specifically, I can’t seem to get in the habit of using the system. It’s web/cloud based instead of a desktop module that tied with my email. I don’t usually surf the web while working and I am losing time/not tracking it because I don’t have the habit of opening the internet, and going back to that browser after every email. Any help adjusting to this, or just a new habit in general? I know it’ll end up with me losing money but it’s been 3 weeks and I am just not hitting the swing of things.

    1. Can you use ManicTime (free) or some other desktop program and then enter the data at the end of the day into the firm one?

    2. We have a silly billing software, but there is a workaround that the IT guy showed me. As long as I sign into a specific cleint, all of my web surfing would billed to that cleint until I entered a new cleint. The workaround is simple: (1)Start with a cleint, (2) open the default browser and do some legit work-related surfing for that cleint which will be itemized; (3) while leaving that first browser window open, open a whole new second browser window for personal surfing, and surf away. It will not bill the specfic searches to the cleint, but the time can still be billed to the cleint as long as the first window is open! As a result, I can bill that cleint for as long as I leave the original window open, even when I am doeing other stuff (like what I am doeing now!). Once you close out the first cleint’s research, you must remember to close it and start research for a second cleint another windw or you will be wasting your billeable hours when you surf for personal purposes!

  14. I still don’t understand the appeal of fishnet tights. Can’t you … see the holes? At the very least, wouldn’t they add weird texture to your legs? Wouldn’t they be breezy when it’s cold? Caveat is that I loathe wearing any kind of tights, but can understand the point of black or colorful tights.

    1. I don’t loathe tights as much as I think others do (I wear them just about daily) and I have never understood fishnets either, especially the way Kat seems to think of them as a substitute for normal tights. Not in my neck of the woods! Brr!

    2. I’m a big FLEECE TIGHTS fan in the winter but fishnets read as too se*xy for workwear to me. This is probably due to having only worn fishnets as part of a Halloween costume. In retrospect, “se*xy Hermione” did not need to happen.

    3. Nude fishnets just look like textured tights. The holes are really small. It’s not a look that would strike you as sexy if you saw someone with them. I think it’s more modern than panty hose and it provides more warmth than thin hose (yes, despite the tiny holes).

    4. I believe that people who think nude for you hose are frumpy and old-fashioned find them to be an acceptable substitute.

      I am an old (when I started practicing law we were required to wear hose every day – and pants for women were explicitly banned) but personally prefer a good pair of nude hose to either opaque tights or fishnets but no longer wear them except before a particularly old-fashioned federal court judge just because of the judgment I have read on this website.

      1. Yes, several years ago it was considered Totally Old Fashioned and Frumpy and Utterly Not Done to wear nude hose, ever. So some of us who didn’t care for bare legs for one reason or another latched onto nude mini-fishnets as a substitute. In hindsight it seems silly, but there you have it.

        Then the Dutchess of Cambridge started wearing nude hose and the rule seemed to relax a bit.

        And now, of course, we’re all wearing sweatpants and leggings so none of it matters at all!

        1. Lol! I hate hose and recall days of having to wear them to work, but I’d do nude hose over fishnets any day of the week. Personally, though, if it’s that cold our, I’m running with a velvet jumpsuit or something covering my legs anyway…

    5. The fishnets form to your curves better which is wonderful for hard-to-fit shapes but I’m with the reader who has tactile issues. I hate how they feel over the sole of my foot and if I ever wear them it’s with a footie sock over my bare foot. They are definitely warmer than nylons.

    6. You’re confusing “stripper fishnets” (big holes) with the kinds of fishnet we are talking about where you wouldn’t know they were fishnet unless you were on top of the person. Tiny holes.

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