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Updated: Oct 30, 2018 148 Comments · by

Coffee Break: Faux Suede Comfort Ballet Flat

Coffee Break |

This post may contain affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

Here's a question: What is your favorite foldable flat (or other lightweight flat) to throw in your bag or keep at work in your desk drawer? The company I've always recommended in the past, CitySlips, has apparently gone out of business (RIP) and so I've been looking for a replacement (although there are still the old standards like Dr. Scholl's and so forth). This one isn't totally foldable because it doesn't have a split sole, but it's got a lot of good ratings and comes in several fun colors. I thought we'd feature it today for readers on the hunt for a cheap flat to keep in your bag — for example, if you're going to a conference or a networking event where you're expecting your heels to get painful at some point in the evening and you know you'll want to put on flats the second you get out of there. (That has been my strategy, at least!) These are $25 at Amazon with free Prime shipping and free returns. Ollio Faux Suede Comfort Ballet Flat (L-all)

Sales of note for 10.10.24

  • Nordstrom – Extra 25% off clearance (through 10/14); there's a lot from reader favorites like Boss, FARM Rio, Marc Fisher LTD, AGL, and more. Plus: free 2-day shipping, and cardmembers earn 6x points per dollar (3X the points on beauty).
  • Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale (ends 10/12)
  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything plus extra 25% off your $125+ purchase
  • Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
  • Eloquii – Extra 50% off a lot of sale items, with code
  • J.Crew – 40% off sitewide
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site, plus extra 25% off orders $150+
  • Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
  • Neiman Marcus – Sale on sale, up to 85% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 50% off 2+ markdowns
  • Target – Circle week, deals on 1000s of items
  • White House Black Market – Buy one, get one – 50% off full price styles

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

About Kat

Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. Baltimore Therapist

    Can anyone recommend a therapist in Baltimore? Downtown to North Baltimore preferable. Looking for help with anxiety related to work stuff and also the election.

  2. 1 on 1 with new manager

    Looking for advice from the hive on 1:1s – I recently transferred departments at the same employer and are now part of a new team doing completely new things with a new manager. I’ve been in this job for 1 week.

    I’ve spoken with her through the interview process and had a brief 1:1, and tomorrow we’ll have 30 minutes to check in again. What are some of the topics I should review with her to make sure I use the time productively and help reaffirm her confidence?

    Here are some of the things I’m thinking of
    – 5 min update on my training this past week / show I’m coming up to speed as best as I can
    – questions on next steps – when should I transition certain tasks from other team members
    – areas I need her help /confirmation, i.e. signing up for additional training that she’s suggested

    Would appreciate any scripts / suggestions, especially from managers on what makes early 1:1s useful.

      • Anon

        I actually would not ask this. I always ask that question during interviews. Once I’m in the position, I think that I’m expected to know, more or less, what good looks like, even if I can’t achieve it. I would personally be concerned if I hired someone and then they said to me “So, what does success look like?”

        • Coach Laura

          I actually would recommend asking this- a variation of this. OP has only been on the job for a week and was an internal transfer not a new hire.

          OP use this time to solidify short term training goals and longer term position goals. But don’t go in asking- bring a bullet point list of possiblilities and observations that you’ve prepared and be ready to discuss.

    • Anonymous

      Ask your manager what she wants out of the 1:1!

      Is it supposed to be a work update time? Discuss person development? Just chat? Talk about stressors and work load? Different places will treat 1:1s differently. The things you have listed are good things to come prepared with, but I think it’s also ok to ask what the mgr expects to get out of the time. I mean, it’s your first week – this IS the time to ask.

    • AnonZ

      If there’s anything you’re uncertain of, asking specifically for feedback on that thing. For example, “I’ve been working on the software demo, could I schedule time with you at some point to get your critique?” or “I’ve finished an initial draft of X document, would it be possible for you to review and give feedback?”

      It is always tough when new hires ask, “Do you have any feedback for me??” because the honest answer is pretty much always, “Well, you sort of suck at everything right now, but that’s OK because you’re learning.”

      Honestly, anyone who comes to their 1:1 with a written list of topics to cover and doesn’t just expect me to carry the entire meeting is already doing pretty decently.

  3. Pear shaped

    Style/fit question

    Where should my cardigans end, and which type is most flattering for my shape?

    I am a slender extreme pear (no chest). I wear pants most days (ankle pants or flares with heels), mid rise, and I am short waisted. I feel dowdy with my sweaters on top. Blazers are a problem, as they require a lot of tailoring for fit and I sometimes have to throw a lab coat on top which is a problem for more structured toppers.

    • MJ

      If you’re short waisted, I recommend sweaters that end at high hip. In my experience, stuff longer than that looks ill-fitting and makes you “lose” your waist. Hope that helps.

      • Pear shaped

        Thanks, that does help.

        This seems to be an atypical length, as none of mine stop there. Maybe I need to buy petites, or is there a name for a cardigan that short?

        • Pears

          I loved my Bloomingdales house brand cashmere cardigan from a few seasons ago. It was the perfect length. I like LL Bean as well but there’s isn’t as soft anymore as it was in years past.

    • Ellen

      I agree with MJ. B/c of my hourglass figure, with big boobies AND a big tuchus, I try and wear looser fit CARDIGAN sweaters that are not too long — I would suggest you too can have the bottom of the CARDIGAN sweaters end slightly below the HIP. It is no bonus to have a tuchus, even with boobies. I think a blazer properly tailored is better then any sweater. Go for the blazer or Brook’s Brother suits, b/c they can work wonders with ladies with larger tuchuses.

      • Pear shaped

        Yeah, I’ve wondered about that. I haven’t figured out how to make at work either….

        Maybe I hate sweaters too.

        But I’m so cold…..

        • Pear shaped

          Oops…

          I meant I haven’t figured out how to belt a sweater that looks ok and doesn’t require adjustment frequently.

          • Godzilla

            Oh, use fabric belts. Like a huge elastic belt. Obviously, you’ll have to adjust once you stand up but leather/pleather moves around too much.

    • Anonymous

      I’m also a pear and I recently splurged for an MM LaFleur ‘jardigan.’ I have the urge to wear it pretty much every day of the week. It has the structure up top that blazers give, but also some stretch and draping so doesn’t need tailoring (or could do with just a couple of darts instead of being totally restructured), and the way it comes to a low point in the front but slopes up in back is really flattering. Could be your answer!

        • Anonymous

          Not that I know of (sigh) but I found mine on Poshmark for a slight discount. It’s one thing I can emphatically say is worth the money, because if you like it as much as I do, you WILL be wearing it at least once a week for the foreseeable future. I have the Woolf and it works with all pants, most skirts, and some dresses. It’ll also fit easily under your lab coats.

    • anonypotamus

      I’m more hourglass than pear (mostly thanks to shoulders rather than b@@bs), but am extraodinarily shortwaisted and have had good luck with the halogen 3/4 length sleeved cardigans from Nordstrom. They typically have multiple colors every season and you can often find them on sale. The bottom hits the top of my hip bone and looks good with both pencil skirts (my go-to bottom for work) or pants (and dresses for that matter). I rarely button them.

      • Pear shaped

        Thanks for this. Those have been recommended here in the past, and 3/4 length sleeves are best for me, but I wish they had V-necks….

    • S

      I am pear shaped and I find the most flattering cut is one that hits at the hip. Basically the bottom of my sweater is where the top of my pants/skirt are.

      I’d be weary of a wrap sweater these are hard for pears because of the lack of a chest and while they are fabulous at showing off a narrow waist the often also draw attention to a small chest.

      Ann Taylor has the Ann cardigan which hits at the hip and also offers a cropped cardigan which depending on how high the waist is on your pants may work.

      • wary/leery

        I think you mean “wary” or “leery” (cautious) but not “weary” (tired). Not trying to be grammar police at all, but it’s a mistake I used to make until someone corrected me, and I thought you may want to know just in case. We all know what you mean either way!

  4. 401k

    Anyone ever look at their 401k balance and think there’s TOO long of a way to go? I’m 36 and I look at it as compared to others (on early retirement forums) and realize I am SO far behind — in large part bc I started at 25 (post law school rather than 22). I’ve always maxed out — but had 1.5 yrs of unemployment and spent the first 10 yrs of my career with an employer that didn’t match. No one in that industry matches, so it wasn’t one bad employer. And now with a match and looking at comparison numbers I realize — I could be 100k-200k further along.

    Doesn’t help that I want to be out of my job/industry ASAP . . . .

    Anyone else feel this or is it more of a — set it and forget it, you never check the balance — kind of endeavor for you?

    • nutella

      I think you have to have a set it and forget it attitude because it is an extremely long-term goal and will otherwise drive you crazy. Be proud that you are contributing now — you can’t change the past! Keep up the good work!

      • Amy

        This. We look at our retirement accounts and feel like we’ll never get where we want to be…but then we remember we’re way farther along than we were a few years ago. Not all employers match (that was DH’s issue, for seven years of his late 20s and early 30s) and not all that match offer decent matches (me, the last four years, getting a 2% match). We have always saved other money on top of what we save for retirement, and I just try to have faith that we’ll get there, between retirement and our other savings.

        At 36, you still have a long time to save. A really awesome investment advisor I know – she’s in her 60s – told me that when she was my age (40), she made a vow to save what she could every month and never touch the savings. She wasn’t saving a lot of money – she started out saving $50 a month – but she saved consistently and she refused to raid her savings, even when she felt like she really needed to. She said she now has more than enough to retire. That gave me a lot of hope, that it will work out in the end.

    • Torin

      I wish I could set it and forget it but I too check mine and feel like retirement is never going to happen on a regular basis. I didn’t start really working until 28 (after a couple years of living hand-to-mouth and then law school) and my first job had no 401K so I only contributed to my IRAs and that was it as far as retirement savings. I max my 401k out now, but the 10 year lag from my peers who started saving right after undergrad is pretty hard to make up.

    • Anonymous

      I check the balance periodically, but I try to mostly put it out of my mind (beyond maxing out). I’m in my early 30s and I’m not focused on an early retirement and I have a lot of things I need to save for before then, including day care so I can keep working (daycare costs in my area are just about equal to my salary) and kids’ college educations. If it makes you feel better, I’m no doubt pretty far behind you. I didn’t start contributing until I was 30 and I’ve never had an employer match. I just figure all I can do is save what I can. I’m sure I can save enough so that I’ll be ok as long as I’m living independently and if/when I need assisted living, I’ll have to deal with whatever Medicaid will cover. On my salary in a low cost of living state, it would be almost impossible to save the multi-millions you’d need for a private assisted living facility anyway (a family member who has dementia but is in great physical health is burning through $200k a year for 24/7 care- I earn less than $40k a year, so am never going to have $2M in savings no matter how frugal I am).

    • Anonymous

      What is the point of this? You did what you did. Why are you comparing yourself to randoms on the Internet?

      • 401k

        Bc I’m trying to set a plan for early retirement and/or figure out if it’s feasible. In doing that you read on the internet — esp. forums for early retirement — and you run across people who are 36 who are already at 400-500k (individually — I get why people would be there with a spouse).

        I do realize that those forums skew towards people who have saved a TON — a ton more than what even diligent savers would save. But it makes you think . . . .

        • Anonymous

          Ok, but if it’s upsetting and pointless, stop. If you want more, save more. Calculating how much you would have gotten with a match is useless information. You didn’t.

        • CHJ

          I also love early retirement blogs/forums, BUT you have to use your discretion and pick ones that don’t make you feel bad. For example, I like The Frugalwoods because I think their approach is very positive and upbeat. I don’t like Mr. Money Mustache because he acts like anyone who doesn’t do what he does is foolish (for example, I am not going to bike to work and I have valid reasons for not doing so). If what you are reading makes you feel bad, keep looking for better ones where you can relate to the authors.

          • Bacon Anon

            +1 – I also do not care for MMM.

            OP – I’m 35 and I’ve got 77K in 401k/IRA. Had some lean years and have never maxed my 401k. My projection estimates (using Financial Engine thru Vanguard) says I’ll be fine (retirement age of 67). Yes, its assuming I’ll get Social Security (I am not assuming that and the projection shows me what is SS and what is my savings), and it’s assuming a certain rate of return from the stock market that I’m not totally sold on, but for the most part it looks as fine as it can.

            Will I continue to strive towards maxing out and saving more – sure. But I that’s about all I can do – I don’t have control over the rest of it.

    • Walnut

      If you have the ability to save more than the 401k maximums, you might look into opening a taxable investment account. It’ll at least give you piece of mind that you’re doing as much as you can to stock pile for the future unknowns.

    • Jessica F. Walker \\ Millennial Life Skills Coach

      Its one of those things that snowballs, and while you could be further along now, at least you’ve been contributing as you can. While its important to know how much you have and keep track of its growth, I think if you spend too much time on it, it’ll just make you sick. Maybe check it once a quarter and if its not making the progress you’d like for it to, talk to a financial adviser about other ways to grow it.

    • Emmer

      I don’t think you can “set it and forget it” if your goal is to retire very early – like in 10 years. To do that, you need to have a high-paying job AND making a deliberate plan to live frugally. Not to mention that you have to plan for or rule out other potential unexpected expenses (kids, ailing parents, medical emergencies, etc.).

      But if by “early” you just mean right at 65, you’re probably fine. Pump up your savings where you can. Otherwise, keep living your life.

      • CPA Lady

        ^agreed. MMM and the like had a very specific set of circumstances that allowed them to truly retire early. Unless you had those exact circumstances, you’re going to need to bust your ass and be obsessed with every penny to retire early.

        FWIW, a large majority of Americans will never be able to retire. They will simply work until they are no longer able and live out their remaining years in poverty. So if comparing yourself to other people who are slightly better off makes you feel bad, perhaps consider the millions of people for whom any type of retirement is a complete fantasy? Or consider the Teddy Roosevelt quote, “Comparison is the thief of joy.”

  5. shamlet96

    Any other fed gov’t ‘rettes worried about the pay freeze Trump appears to have just instituted? I can’t find a lot of details, but it looks like it applies to all agencies (military excepted). His campaign promises had said an exception for public safety and public health, but I don’t see that anywhere now. Grrr.

    • Anon

      Talking about this in my office in the last week or so — so it’s totally expected. I say some people ARE freaking out. I don’t 100% understand it — as far as I see it — we have/will have our raises for this yr, so for this yr you are making what you expected. Will there be a raise next yr – no. So you now have 12 months to decide whether that makes you want to switch jobs and to start that process or whether it isn’t worth the hassle of applying etc. for the few thousand more you would have gotten. And maybe if a switch isn’t worth it in yr 1 of a pay freeze, it’ll be worth it in yr 2 or 3.

    • Frozen Fed

      Prior to the raise we got at the beginning of 2017, we just came out of a 3 year pay freeze. So I’m not sure what’s different.

      I’m more concerned about the hiring freeze and what it will do to our programs.

  6. goldie

    How can I prevent my black suit jackets from getting shiny at the elbows? I thought it was an issue of quality, but I just noticed it on a wool, fairly new Brooks Brothers suit which seems well-made. Is there any way to fix this afte the fact? Dry cleaning doesn’t seem to help

    • TorontoNewbie

      Are you propping your elbows on your desk? That seems to be what causes it for me. If anyone has any suggestions I’d also love to hear them.

      • anon

        This causes it for me too. I’ve been trying to stop resting my elbows on my desk. I find that it makes me sit up straighter too, which is a nice side effect.

  7. Anonymous

    Shopping help please:

    My little sister is getting married in June, and has asked me to be a bridesmaid. She wants us to wear long black gowns and told me to shop around and see what I like. Her tastes are pretty simple and classic as far as gowns go. I’m having trouble finding something I’m really in love with for a reasonable price. Suggestions for places to look for something under $200? Or that will likely go on sale to hit that price point in the next few months?

  8. Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer

    …Is way, way too expensive. I’m asking for recs for cheaper replacements before I hit “add to cart” on another $44 tube….

    • NOLA

      MAC prep+prime Beauty Balm is $31 and I liked it the best of all I tried (including Laura Mercier). I have really sensitive eyes and skin and I’m very pale, so it was a struggle to find one that worked.

      • ELS

        Yes. 100%, especially if you, like me, have dry skin. It’s the first foundation that I have really liked in a long time, and I’ve tried a TON.

        Also, a little goes a long way. I’ve had my $11 tube for 2 months now, and it’s maybe halfway empty? I wear foundation daily.

    • June

      BareMinerals Complexion Rescue gel cream, if you are OK with a little less coverage

    • anne-on

      Do you mind having two steps? I like the Laura Mercier radiance primer paired with Maybelline BB cream. Still glowy, and lasts much longer, but a heck of a lot less $$. I also add real sunblock, so maybe 3 steps depending on how much sun you get.

    • trefoil

      Me too–and if you’re a size 5-6, the kids sizes 3-4 are perfect. (I find it hard to find leather flats that are small enough).

  10. Anonymous

    If you’re going to be at an event where you’re expecting your heels to get painful, then I think it’s time to buy new shoes. Foldable flats to me look like socks when they’re on someone’s feet and are not a professional look.

    • anon

      She mentioned putting on flats “the second you get out of there” – like if you’re walking to the subway or whatever. Who cares if they look less professional at that point.

      • Anonymous

        The Dr. Scholl’s are basically satin socks though, so any puddles (or worse), broken glass, needles, etc you step on will be in contact with your skin.

  11. Chicago Girls' Weekend

    I’m planning a girls’ weekend to Chicago in early March. We want to rent a place through air bnb or VRBO. What neighborhoods should we look at? We want to shop (non-chain, boutique-type shops), eat, drink wine, and possibly go to a spa. Thanks for your help ladies!

    • AEK

      Based on your interests, Logan Square, Lincoln Square, or Bucktown / Wicker Park could all work. You can take public transportation or Uber et al. downtown if you want to do museums, big theater, etc., but doesn’t sound like that’s a priority.
      There’s always Lincoln Park/ Old Town too, which is pretty, close to downtown, and has good food & fancy spas, but for every boutique there’s a chain store, and depending on your age, you might find the denizens to be… I have no idea how to finish that sentence.

      I like Allyu spa in West Town.

      • CHL

        If you stay in Wicker Park, Spa Soak on Milwaukee is good. You could go over to Logan Square for dinner at Longman and Eagle or Lula, Webster’s Wine Bar.

      • CHL

        Also, I live in Logan Square and love it, but I probably wouldn’t recommend AirBnB’ing there unless you really know the area or are very close to the Blue Line. It’s a really big neighborhood and there are some parts that I wouldn’t feel safe traipsing about at night after drinking a lot of wine if you didn’t know the neighborhood. Some might disagree with me, but I felt that I should put it out there.

    • SuziStockbroker

      We stayed in an AirBnB in Wicker Park last Labour Day weekend, it was perfect.

    • Lillers

      I second Bucktown/Wicker Park, although the chain stores are definitely taking over as high rents have driven out boutiques. Ruby Room is a new-agey spa on Division St that is nice.

  12. Anon

    On the investment theme above — are you putting money into the market now or not. I’m not asking about 401ks — as I am continuing those investments in the same amounts as before since they’re for the extreme long haul. I’m asking about taxable accounts.

    I feel like the market will like this presidency — lower taxes, easier corporate profit repatriation etc. But then part of me thinks the market won’t — all the anti-trade, protectionist stuff; in fact a market rally faded on Friday when Trump started talking protectionism in his speech. So invest still? Or stay on the sidelines? I’ve been on the sidelines since Election Day bc I figured there would be a pullback after the rally. I think we may be starting the pullback now, yet I still don’t know.

    Also if you are investing — is it all S&P index? I mostly do index funds but I do pick sector funds and (rarely) individual stocks. Yet now I feel like all it takes is one tweet and a sector drops by 5-10% and doesn’t necessarily recover. So for the next 4 yrs, is it better to stay in a broad index — so a tweet re 1 industry has minimal effect on the 450 companies in the index that aren’t in that industry?

    • Anon

      My money’s in a retirement target date fund. People can debate the merits of them, but it’s the best option out there for my needs and set it and forget it ease. If you’re not in the market, your money’s safe, but only growing negligibly.

    • anon

      My retirement money is going into the same broad index funds as usual because of the long time frame. Temporarily halted all other investing in favor of doubling my emergency fund (in a traditional savings account) as a hedge against any potentially catastrophic outcomes from this new administration. When that goal is accomplished (which will probably take a year or so), then back to investing again since I don’t believe it’s possible to time the market.

    • CHJ

      I’m still investing, primarily in a Fidelity total market index fund (FSTVX) and U.S. bond funds (FSITX). Both have low fees and good diversification. But like you, I’m worried about instability, so I’m also throwing extra money at one of my student loans (5% interest rate) because I’m not sure the market will out perform that.

    • Pear shaped

      I sold a bunch at year’s end for tax reasons to capture gains, and am now sitting on the cash for a little while debating the same thing.

      I’m in it for the long haul, so in general I don’t overthink it, don’t try to time it, and go for index funds. So I will probably just buy again in the next couple months.

      BUT… as I think Trump’s words/antics can have a shocking day to day destabilization of the markets, I will probably wait until he says something extreme and the market plunges and then buy. Because the market is so volatile these days, it will likely shoot back up soon after.

      And I’ll admit that I have put a bit more over the years in Berkshire Hathaway, which does very well.

  13. Which poster?

    Sort of a variation on Nutella’s post encouraging everyone to run for office:

    which poster/commenter would you most like to see run for office?

    For me, it’s emeralds, nutella, Senior Attorney and of course Kat! .

    • Anonymous

      Godzilla for president, and I’d like to see Shots Shots Shots in the Senate!

    • nutella

      Oh my goodness, that was so kind and made me smile so big! My friends just said the same thing the other night, which is what made me think a little harder about it. I really want to see a lot more women running — some days I feel like Leslie Knope because from Condoleezza Rice to Hillary Clinton to Sandra Day O’Connor, I admire them so much. Women should have more seats at the table, no matter their political leanings. And there are so many women on this board that I admire, too, professionally and personally! I have felt a lot of despair since the election and up until this weekend’s march, it was the women here that helped me stay inspired, focused, and nasty! :)

      • Senior Attorney

        Ha! I am so thin skinned that running for office is pretty much the most nightmarish thing I can think of! But I am flattered to be thought of!

  14. airbnb frustration

    I recently received a bad airbnb review as a guest, accusing my husband and me of being “scammers.”

    Long story short: we rented a condo in the Caribbean. This was a small 1BR condo in a gated community, about $400 a night. But there were cockroaches. We let the host know as soon as we saw them (first morning), and I asked if we could check out in exchange for a refund of the remaining nights. I was shocked when he said no, and sent an exterminator instead. We saw dozens of roaches during our stay. I wish we would have checked out and risked losing the money, but we didn’t because we were really concerned about losing thousands of dollars.

    He denies there were any cockroaches in the (long rambling) review and says we were trying to scam him out of money. But that doesn’t even make sense because how would we benefit even if we got a refund?? We would have to have the hassle of checking-out, finding a hotel, and paying the same or likely more for an equivalent hotel, particularly one with a kitchen(ette). I wrote a very short response stating the review was not accurate, there were coackroaches, pointing to my other positive reviews, and noting how the scammer label doesn’t even make sense.

    We typically use airbnb to find higher end vacation rentals. And I’d like to keep using it, despite this bad experience. I think I learned some things that could have been red flags on looking at the property posting to avoid something like this from happening again. But I am now concerned that other hosts will be hesitant to rent to us. My husband thinks I am worrying about nothing, and that the host’s review isn’t very credible or sensible, but I am sure he is biased…. thoughts?

    • anon

      Do you have any pics or video of the roaches to post on the website? That would certainly shut down any further debate about this matter!

      • airbnb frustration

        Yes indeed, I posted pictures of 9 different roaches. No videos, unfortunately. I tried to get one, but they skitter away really quickly. The host claims these are photos of dead roaches (and implies I planted them I guess? – which is obviously insane).

    • Anon

      Aren’t they very common in tropical climates? Like, extremely common? I lived in a nice house in southern Spain for a semester, and we had them all the time. I’ve also been in the BVIs a number of times and seen them all over the place.. not in a nice hotel, but you weren’t in a nice hotel. You were in an AirBnB. If he’s a local, I might understand where he’s coming from as they are ‘par for the course’ where he’s from, at least in my experience.

      That aside, the long rambling review might make him look a little nutty and will likely cause future renters to look past it. I wouldn’t worry too much.

      • Anon

        But I agree with anon above – he’s denying there were any roaches is obviously not ok/true. Can you appeal to the company if it means that much to you?

        • airbnb frustration

          I did appeal to the company, but they told me to just write a response if I think the content is inaccurate, which I did.

      • airbnb frustration

        Yeah, I get the whole roaches are common thing. I have lived in a place for 30+ years where roaches are really common, I see them outside particularly around trash all the time. But never in my house, because we do proper pest control on a regular basis.

        And more importantly, that’s even more of a reason to think I am not lying…..

        • Anonymous

          I get my house treated, live in a tropical climate and probably see a few a week even inside.

      • Blonde Lawyer

        I stayed in a 5 star resort in Spain and freaked out over the cockroaches. This was in college on a study abroad trip. I called home crying hysterically. Turns out, I have a bit of a roach phobia and did not know it since I had never seen one. I was on a group trip so checking out wasn’t an option. My freaked out phone call (I just wanted assurances that roaches wouldn’t kill me in my sleep. Yes, I was that freaked out) cost a couple hundred dollars apparently. My professor joked around with the hotel manager about my freak out and they took the phone call charge off – only after explaining that even the fanciest of places there will have the occasional roach. Like moths in rural New England in the summer. They always find a way in.

      • Anonymous

        Yeah I’ve never gone to the Caribbean or Hawaii and not seen a roach. I think you overreacted.

        • airbnb frustration

          Meh. If not wanting to stay in accommodations with a roach infestation is overreacting, I am cool with “overreacting.” Maybe my HOA “overreacts” by regularly spraying my home to prevent roaches and other vermin from coming inside. If so, I am also OK with that as I don’t want them inside around my family. They can be outside all they want! And if not wanting to be told I am lying about cockroaches and that I am a scammer is also overreacting, I am fine with that too.

    • Anon

      I don’t rent out on AirBnb, so my opinion is worth a grain of salt. But I’m guessing if it’s between you and another couple who doesn’t have a negative review, it’s going to go to the other couple. If you’re the only one trying for a certain week, they’ll probably dig deeper and make their own call based on how risk-averse they are as a renter.

      I’d say yes. It has the potential to hurt you. But I don’t know what you do about it now or what you’re trying to change. Next time you want to use Airbnb, then you try it and see if someone rents to you. If so, yay! If not, then go with a hotel or whatever you usual backup plan is. I don’t see how this changes your actions at all.

      • airbnb frustration

        Fair points. I guess I am not used to having a back-up plan. We usually just do Instant Book and be done with it. We don’t find hotels equivalent, unless they have a kitchen. The main reason we want to stay in a condo complex for vacations is to have a kitchen (we really hate eating out for a week straight) and a bit more space and autonomy.

        But we have had some really good experiences staying in “hotel rooms” at nice resorts that are more like condos (i.e., living room, kitchen, bedroom, 2 bathrooms). That option isn’t always available, but would make a good back-up plan. Maybe it is a safer option anyways, and should be my first choice going forward.

      • AnonMidwest

        I do rent out on air B&B, and while I would guess that some hosts will just pass over you, I read and message with my guests to get a better sense of the person coming to stay with me. Much like reading product reviews on Amazon, I try to take all comments in context.

        bottom line: it wouldn’t hurt you with me, but i’d want to get the feeling you are the sane one in the complaint/response.

    • JuniorMinion

      Also worth noting – I grew up in a cold climate where “having roaches” meant that you were dirty as they only occured if you left open trash around. Now I live in the South in a semi-tropical climate and they are everywhere (palmetto bugs) and they FLY – it doesn’t matter if you leave no food out and keep your trash in an enclosed place (which we do). We spray indoors and outdoors on our pest control’s recommended timeline and they still invade my house all the time ESPECIALLY right after its sprayed. And I live in a relatively new home with central air where we almost never open the windows and have doorjambs / other electricity efficiency type stuff. I can only imagine how many bugs I would find if I lived in an older / more open air home.

      It definitely took some getting used to though. If I even leave a whole banana on the counter not wrapped up I get fruit flies. On the upside I’ve never had to water plants and they keep growing.

      • Another Southerner

        Also, to follow up, one of the things that spraying does is drive them out. It doesn’t kill them in situ. If you happened to have your vacation when there was a bit of a dry spell at the location, that’ll also drive them indoors in search of water. If you’re not used to the tendencies of bugs in tropical climates, I can see how this would be unsettling. The host didn’t handle it well, either.

    • question

      What red flags have you noticed? I’m an infrequent airbnb user but always wary of it… hearing what you’ve learned from experience would be helpful!

      • airbnb frustration

        Maybe red flags is a strong phrase, but small things like the posting not seeming 100% professional (some bad grammar/spelling). And I would also suggest taking the photos and making sure there is a photo of each thing the host says exists in the condo. Like there should be pictures of two showers if there are allegedly two bathrooms for example.

        This is anecdotal, but I think the main thing I will avoid is renting from an individual rather than a professional vacation property management company. I have always had great experiences in the past, but every single one of my prior rentals were from a company, not an individual. I also realized that I can find these companies simply by using Googling their airbnb username, and most offer the option to book directly through them instead of a third party like airbnb. I just did that for a rental for a trip this weekend. So no need to fret about my booking getting cancelled by the host over the bad review!

  15. Vacation Brainstorming

    Me and my travel buddy are looking for ideas for a week long vacation this July. Criteria: able to leave after work Friday/early Saturday and return the following Sunday, no greater than a 10 hour flight/combo of flight and drive, want access to a pool/beach/lake but not just a beach town, must have excellent food, not Spain or Greece, and somewhere we can basically do one thing a day and lounge waterside in the afternoons and not feel like we are missing out on seeing the place. And, for added fun, we are looking to do this on the cheaper side, under 2k a person not including flights, and we do not want to camp or stay in a hostel. Zika is not a concern. Any ideas?

    • Anonymous

      I stayed near a little surf down in DR called Cabarete, next to a beach called Encuentro. Cabarete itself has restaurants and clubs and pool halls on the beach, the surfing in Encuentro is great for beginners (and lessons are cheap), there are many beaches and none are over-crowded, and it’s all really cheap. My favorite part was going horseback riding in the mountains about 40 minutes away; we went galloping all through the forest trails and trotted knee-deep through clear rivers. My other favorite part was, instead of cabs, you can literally hail motorcycles; pretty intimidating the first few times to climb onto the back of a stranger’s moto, but there is very little that is more pleasant than zipping around the tropics like that! Just be careful which side you climb on, lest you burn yourself on the muffler (muffler burn scars are so common they’re called ‘Dominican tattoos’!)

      I think it could be perfect for what you’re looking for. There’s a resort-heavy area called Punta Cana nearby, but where’s the fun in that?

    • Anonymous

      Florence/Siena/Pisa/Tuscany.

      Lots of great agriturismos with pools and tons of day trips to different cities. Pisa is close enough to the beach for a day trip.

      • Anonymous

        We’d want to see way too much of Florence for this to work! We tend to be very much wake up at 7am every day type travelers- looking for something where we won’t have that need.

        • Anonymous

          I meant stay outside of the city though – in the countryside. Plan day trips – you can do Florence as a day trip, then a day by the pool, then a winery tour the next day, then another day in Florence, then a day by the pool, then a day in Pisa etc.

          And now I want to go back to Italy.

        • anon

          The Amalfi coast would fit your criteria though would be tough in your budget that time of year.

        • Snoozy

          Can you get to Croatia? A week of island hoping from Split to Dubrovnik would work. If you picked a few – Korcula, Hvar – then you could relax in between. Or Lake Bled and Lake Bohinj in Slovenia. Either should work price-wise.

          • Midtown

            doesn’t fit the 10 hour flight/drive combo, but for a few more hours, you fit within the price range and it’s literally perfect for this. In rovinj, we’d go visit olive oil farms/presses, then spend the afternoon at the beach. in hvar, all day at the beach, then dinner in town, it was simply THE BEST.

    • and now for your local puerto rico booster

      I feel like I say this every single time a request for vacation spots comes up, but Puerto Rico. I don’t know if it fits your “excellent food” criteria but otherwise there are plenty of things to do but not so many “must do”s that it feels like you’re missing out. Flight was easy and direct from East Coast, also fairly cheap and hassle-free due to being American territory. I stayed for about four days in the spring in San Juan and I went with someone who was also super cheapo, but we spent probably about $1000 for the whole trip, flights included. We did AirBNB and rented a car for one day to go out to the rainforest – otherwise walked, took public transport or cabs.

    • Monte

      Portugal. Under 7 hours to Lisbon, and you can hang by the pool there and then take a quick train to a new city for a few days if you want beach time. Great food, both Portuguese and global, with plenty to see (thought it’s not hard to take it easy).

      I love Puerto Rico, but I think that depends on the kind of sightseeing you want to do between beach time. Same for DR.

  16. Anyone in Columbus, OH?

    Trying to make some local connections/friends as I am about to move there and thought I’d ask here. Nervous to post my contact info and out myself but hoping someone here is there and might have contact info so we can connect!

    • Anon

      My son is a medical school student there and loves it. He wouldn’t take kindly to me giving his contact info though!

      • Anyone in Columbus, OH?

        Trying to figure out where to live, where people who are over 28 socialize (am in my mid 30s without a spouse or kids), etc. Figured it might be nice to have some local input. As for your son, I won’t ask if he’s single… but I want to ;)

        • Cbus in the house

          Yes! I’m mid 30s and with spouse, a kid, and another on the way. For commuting reasons, we are in the suburbs. But if it were me, I’d live in Grandview. Lots of restaurants, bars, shops, and new condos going up everywhere. Maybe Short North of you want more city or German Village for that Georgetown-like feel but I hear that it is more of a pain. Happy to be a local contact but have no idea how to get you my info without posting for all the world here. I’m also a transplant and really love it.

    • anon8

      I’m from the area! I might be a bit late responding today, but I’ll post some contact info tomorrow. I’m 39, married but no kids. Hopefully I can help!

      • Anyone in Columbus, OH?

        yay, thanks!! Do you live there now or are you a previous resident?

  17. Hypnosis?

    Has anyone ever tried hypnosis to help with a bad habit?
    I am not a kook— I vaccinate, believe in Western medicine, science, et al. But even with therapy there is a destructive habit I’m having trouble breaking and I’d like to know if looking into hypnosis is worth it.

    Has it worked? How many sessions? How do you find someone reliable?

    • ChiLaw

      I haven’t done it personally, but I know people (also regular believers in western medicine and science and all that) who’ve found it very helpful for getting over phobias. They got connected to a practitioner through their MD.

    • Blonde Lawyer

      I’ve done it and used it to get better about skin picking. It was helpful but you really have to keep up with the self-hypnosis too. I’m planning on making another appointment soon to work on my fear of flying. I’d like to give up the xanax crutch since I need to be able to drive after an upcoming flight.

    • Anon

      I’ve tried an app for anxiety and it definitely put me in a state of relaxation and helped me sleep. But the jury’s still out as to whether or not it actually has helped with the root anxiety issue via the affirmations.

    • Lorraine

      Yup! Haven’t a smoked in 34 years after just one session with a hypnotist. It didn’t make it easy, but it did make it possible. But I still smoke in my dreams and cigarette smoke still smells good to me!

  18. Tetra

    Two friends and I want to have a very easy beach vacation long weekend at the end of March. Where would be an easy place for us to go (two from Houston, one from DC)? I’ve never done an all-inclusive but I’m thinking this might be the right time to try it.

    • Anonymous

      Live Aqua Cancun! Super easy flight from Houston, probably from D.C too. It’s an AI but more upscale and quiet (it’s adults only) and the food is excellent.

    • anon

      Can’t say enough good things about Excellence Playa Mujeres. It’s adults only, all-inclusive, and the restaurants are amazing. Mostly couples in their late 20s-40s, not a party scene at all but there is entertainment at night if you’re looking for that. The beach is beautiful and so are the pools and rooms.

    • Monte

      Tulum. There are all inclusives, but if you choose not to go that path, a lot of places for food and drink are close together if you wander to wander and stretch your legs. And you can do an occasional excursion on the off chance relaxing on the beach with a cocktail gets old…

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