ByKat Hours Updated
Comments 130 Comments

Gift Idea: Literary T-Shirts and More

Today is Jane Austen's birthday, so obviously I must post a picture of a great t-shirt featuring one of my favorite books. (I am also a fan of the movies, and I am MOSTLY on Team Firth, if you must know, mostly because I dislike that the guy who played Darcy in the 2005 version has proudly noted that he did not read the book in advance — but having just rewatched that one recently I suppose his Darcy portrayal is fine. He is also apparently in Succession, which is on my must-binge list.) IN ANY EVENT: Out of Print books has a lot of fun t-shirts, socks, totes, pouches, journals and more featuring a variety of in-print and out-of-print books. This pretty relaxed t-shirt looks like it would be great for workouts or lounging around (you know, reading books), and is marked to $24 down from $30, and available in sizes XS-3XL.

Also noteworthy: There is a waitlist for this interesting book-recommendation service called TBR — does anyone know of something similar? It's a great idea for a gift.

In totally unrelated gift ideas — readers keep singing the praises of the Rancho Gordo Bean Club, but every time I check they are sold out/have a wait list. If you've gifted one or re-joined recently, please point us the right way!

Sales of note for 12.13

  • Nordstrom – Beauty deals on skincare including Charlotte Tilbury, Living Proof, Dyson, Shark Pro, and gift sets!
  • Ann Taylor – 50% off everything, including new arrivals (order via standard shipping for 12/23 expected delivery)
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – 400+ styles starting at $19
  • J.Crew – Up to 60% off almost everything + free shipping (12/13 only)
  • J.Crew Factory – 50% off everything and free shipping, no minimum
  • Macy's – $30 off every $150 beauty purchase on top brands
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off, plus free shipping on everything (and 20% off your first order)
  • Talbots – 50% off entire purchase, and free shipping on $99+

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

130 Comments

  1. my sister in law has told me her sons (15 and 17) love “hoodies’ in black or red or “manly bracelets”
    that’s it – re: christmas gifts
    no other direction.
    what brands do teen boys like these days?
    are fossil bracelets still good for teen guys?

    I need help!
    i’d like to keep it under $150.

    1. I would barely know where to start on the bracelet question. That’s a thing?

      For the hoodies, I’d go with Under Armour or something similar.

    3. I would look at their Instagrams and figure out what brand hoodies they wear (Under Armour, Nike, Adidas?) and see if you can figure anything out re: the bracelets. You could also get them each a hoodie and the remainder of the money as a gift card.

      1. +1. I think good old Champion hoodies were cool for a while … no idea if that’s still true.

        1. Maybe just go with one of the major brands from a sporting goods store and include a receipt so they can exchange it if it happens to not be a brand they like?

    4. I got my son a bracelet from Carbon2Cobalt dot com last year and he liked it a lot and still wears it.

    5. Can your husband handle these gifts since (1) I’m assuming this is his sister just by the context and (2) he’s a man and these are boys-nearly-men?

      Otherwise, Amazon sells hoodies and bracelets and offers print-at-home gift cards! Don’t stress yourself out trying to divine what teenage boys might like — you’re pretty much not going to be able to. A $50 bill in a cool box will go over a lot better than even the nicest hoodie.

      1. no. it’s my brother’s wife.
        also, “have your husband do it” is not always the answer . . . I like buying gifts for people. teen boys are just hard. (or, maybe they are just hard for me because i have daughters!)

        1. Can you just ask your brother what stores they like to buy their sweatshirts from? If I knew I had the right store I’d be less worried about getting the correct sweatshirt because they can exchange it for a different one from the store

    6. this is really hard. Teepublic has such awesome indie designs and unique hoodies but you’d have to know if they are fans of a thing (like a TV show or a sports team or whatever).

      1. Oh, and Redbubble is great for hoodies too, although they’re not cheap.

    8. Corter Leather Bracelets
      Stussy/Vans Sweatshirts
      Athletic logo sweatshirts are trendy now, Champion, Nike, Adidas
      Carthartt Beanies
      Fancy Water Bottle-Hydroflask, swell
      All in one oldschool nintendo game system

    2. You are so smart, Senior Attorney. Both you and January are my Corporette heroine’s! You always know what to say and do (as does January), and although you are attached and she, like me is single, I feel a special kinship for you and January, who are both mainstay’s on this websight. Kat and Kate, keep up the posts so that we can continue to have the great readers we have, such as Senior Attorney and January, among MANY others! YAY!!!!

  3. Does Cuyana ever have sales? I have the zippered tote, which I love and use every single day and was totally worth the price. I’m eyeing the camera bag, which I don’t really need, so I’m wondering if there will be a chance to pick it up at less than full price.

    1. They don’t have sales that I’ve ever seen, but you could check Poshmark or the like.

  4. Has anyone bought sconces for bedside reading? My lamp is taking up too much real estate but I’m trying to figure out if the sconce won’t work for reading purposes.

    1. I think Ikea has some wall mounted bedside lights that are movable, or at least aim down, which I imagine would be better for a reading light.

      1. I’ve got these – the NYMANE ones, I think (on the adjustable arm). I have them mounted on the wall behind the center of my bed and I’m liking them so far.

    2. I have mounted (hard-wired, not plug-in) sconces on each side of my bed. I use them for reading, and I elected to have them for the exact reason you identify–lamps occupied too much real estate on my nightstands.
      Mine are from Rejuvenation, and I can adjust them (360 degree rotation of the lamp head on an arm that does not bend) to direct the light.

    3. We have plugin sconces from Pottery Barn next to our beds for same reason and they have been great. The cord isn’t super attractive but it goes right behind the bedframe so we can live with it.

    4. Yes, definitely. Check the bulb size/brightness but the ones we have had work great.

    5. We have plug in scones from our local big box store because DH has a bad habit of knocking things off his nightstand while flailing for the alarm clock. Ours are hinged to swing up and down, they rotate side to side, and the shade is frosted. This makes them great for reading without blinding each other.

  5. I’m a pear. I am technically in love with the Leota wrap dresses. My front looks good in a small. The M looks large above the waist — like it’s a wrap but sad and deflated b/c I am flat-chested. Below the waist, the M shows the top elastic of my underwear. This isn’t a problem if I wear a cardigan or jacket. But I know it is lurking.

    Is the fabric too thin? Am I just too lumpy for an otherwise great no-iron machine washable fabric?

    Maybe another cut (the Mindy?) would work with my larger posterior and lumpiness because it is more flowing below the waist?

    1. I don’t think this is the right dress for you. It sounds ill-fitting in every way, and the thin fabric probably isn’t helping matters. FWIW, I’m a pear who gave up on wrap dresses years ago because of similar issues. They are NOT universally flattering, IMO!

      1. Honestly, I’d wear an ill-fitting dress if it were in a washable wrinkle-resistant fabric. Got my priorities so wrong . . .

    2. I am a pear and Leota wrap dresses look terrible on me. I recommend looking at Eliza J – I have a faux wrap jersey dress that looks like it was custom-made for my body type.

    3. I don’t know how anyone wears a jersey wrap dress without full body spanx underneath. That was always my go-to, but I haven’t worn a wrap dress in at least 4 years – they don’t feel current to me anymore.

    5. I’m very pear shaped and have the same problem with Leota. I have had very good luck with Karina dresses, though, especially the ruby, megan and margaret styles. They are all faux wrap, but look nice, NEVER wrinkle, and are machine washable. Some of the prints are too twee, but if you find the right print or solid they are great.

  6. I’m applying for a new job and through a connection, I sent my resume directly to a partner in the group. HR then reached out to me to get dates I was available for an interview. It’s been a while and HR hasn’t been back in touch about the interview. How long would you give it before following up with HR about scheduling?

    2. I would give it a week, then contact HR. But with the holidays so close, be prepared for it to be in January. My office is already pretty dead.

    3. Unfortunately at this point in the year very few people are focused on hiring, unless there’s an emergency need. Most likely you will not hear back from anyone until after Jan. 1, even if you ping HR.

  7. My 11-year-old girl needs to get a fancy dress. She is 5-4 and 95 pounds, so adult height, but not an adult shape at all. Ideally, the dress has sleeves and is knee-length but isn’t casual like a sweater dress but fancier. This is for a father-daughter dance at her school.

    Last year we lucked out at Macy’s. Any other good places to try? Kiddo wears uniforms, so the whole Juniors universe (that I think we’re in) is a foreign land.

    2. Oh man, buying my father-daughter dress every year was the highlight of my school days. What about J. Crew which goes down to size 00 or 000 (I think)? They would have party dresses this time of year. They have a kids section too.

      1. I would not recommend J Crew for this. The kids’ section is way too juvenile, and the grown-up selection is meh and runs very large. I am a lot bigger than OP’s daughter and still sometimes have to take a 0 at J Crew.

        I’ve found some age-appropriate dresses for my skinny 12-year-old in the girls’ department at Nordstrom. A size 14 or 16 might work for OP’s daughter, even in the length. We’ve also had luck with the brand Un Deux Trois, which is pricey but comes in girls’ and juniors’ sizes.

      2. I’m 5’4” and 115 lbs and wear a 00 in JCrew. Their size inflation is pretty intense.

    4. My sister was a similar size that age and our grandmother bought her a bunch of dresses at White House Black Market. That may be more $$$ than you want to spend on that age, though.

    6. I would not assume she cannot wear normal adult clothing and that there are not adults her size. I am 42 and I am about your daughter’s height (a smidge shorter)/weight. I buy women’s clothing albeit in very small sizes and only from certain brands. I would get her measurements and look at size charts online.

  8. I need gift ideas for a friend who lives in LA. I live in the SF Bay Area so I will need to have it shipped to her. She is an executive assistant at an investment firm, has a small dog and volunteers at a dog rescue, likes wine and cocktails, is a baseball and football fan, and loves USA/American flag stuff. She also just moved into a new apartment. Any ideas for things I can have sent to her? Looking to spend about $50 or less.

    1. You know the answer: consumables! Wine (maybe from a place near you that you think she’d like?) plus chocolates or any combo thereof.

    2. Maybe a couple bottles of wine from a nice California winery?
      A custom dog item (what’s the breed)? Tons of places custom make little cartoons for shirts, mugs, etc. of dogs, or have ready made ones for the breed.

    4. I really like L’Occitane almond shower oil and have given it as gifts. At least two recipients are rather annoyed that they are continuing the habit. :)

    5. I don’t know anybody in California who doesn’t love See’s candy.

      Fun fact: I was at a gift exchange over the weekend and everybody went “ooh!!” with excitement when a See’s candy box was unwrapped and then went “oof!” with disappointment when it turned out to be just the box, not full of candy.

      1. +1 for the See’s. I would say a nuts and chews assortment and one lollipop of each flavor.

      2. I hate boxes of See’s candy because they don’t come with a menu, and I have strong opinions about what is inside my chocolate. (Also, food allergies.)

        1. I also dislike See’s because of the menu situation and because it tastes too much like sugar or corn syrup or something. I LOVE Mignon in Pasadena, though.

  9. So yesterday after church, I was in the sanctuary visiting with some people and my minister pulled me aside to tell me that there’s a man in the congregation who has what he called an unhealthy obsession with me. I know who the guy is, although I wouldn’t say that I know him or that he knows me at all. I think, when he showed up several years ago, he was homeless, but now looks much cleaner, etc. but he is not someone I would be interested in. I didn’t think to ask my minister what the man said that concerned him, but my minister asked me if the man had ever said anything to me that crossed the line. He has only spoken to me briefly a couple of times – once to ask if I knew someone (I didn’t) and then to compliment what I was wearing. I’m trying to figure out exactly what to do. One of my friends is furious that the minister didn’t nip this in the bud on my behalf and to protect my safety. One of the minister’s friends told me that the man had asked her how to best approach me (after seeing the two of us talking) and she told him she didn’t know. I have asked a few friends to run interference for me. When he approached me in the hallway as I was leaving, I just said I had to go, then walked out to my car with a family I know. I will be out of town next Sunday, so maybe things will calm down. I just don’t know. Any thoughts about how I should handle this?

    1. Go back to your minister for more details. “Hey Bob, I was thinking about what you said on Sunday and I was wondering if you could provide more details. Should I be worried?”

      1. I think this is the right approach. You barely know the guy and didn’t suspect anything at all, yet your minister was concerned enough to check out the situation. Depending on what you hear, at that point, it would be appropriate to ask the minister to intervene (and who knows, maybe he has already but didn’t share that part). It would be rare for a minister to “kick out” someone from the congregation, so to speak, but it’s definitely not unheard of if someone’s safety is at risk.

        I would be completely creeped out and am sorry you’re dealing with this.

        1. I don’t think he would kick the guy out, but I think he could sit the guy down and tell him that his advances aren’t appropriate.

          2. What advances? Sounds like he hasn’t made any. If he has an unhealthy obsession but never acts on it, then he’s the only one hurt. I think the minister was checking whether the guy was making any actions.

      2. I agree. If you do not want him sniffing around you, tell the minister, and if need be, the guy directly. He probably thinks of you the way men think of me; cute and available b/c you do not have a guy. But just b/c you don’t have a guy does NOT mean you are available to anyone who goes to your church, and shame on the minister if he was trying to make you a match with this guy. Good luck to you, as you do NOT want to have to switch churches, b/c if you do, there may well be similar schlubs where you go.

    2. He’s a minister, not g-d herself! Speaking to you may be all he can do. And no one knows what he has tried to do on your behalf. The minister has to deal perhaps with things said under the seal of confession, which complicates things. Mentally ill people are usually more a danger to themselves than to others, but I’d avoid this person in the short-term in hopes that it would blow over. I’m sad for you that this might mean altering your church habits at Christmas.

        1. Yeah, that puts this in the ballpark of a workplace issue, not a pastoral issue. I would definitely go back and speak to the minister about what exactly is going on here, and what steps he’s planning to take. Because you are an employee, he is obligated to ensure a safe work environment for you.

        2. This changes things for me. The minister or someone higher up in the church is your employer and you have a right to a workplace free of harassment. I’m not talking legally as I don’t know the rules there (in the UK) but ethically. If the minister is aware of an issue he should be dealing with it without putting it on you or leaving you at any risk at all of being creeped on. That may mean he needs to find the guy another congregation for the time being.

      2. He’s not under the seal of confession if he’s already alerted her. There are things he can do, such as: talk to the guy, have the ushers keep an eye on him, ask him to attend a different service than NOLA does, or remove him from the congregation, depending on what exactly the guy said/did.

    3. Why would he tell you this with no additional details? What exactly did the minister say? To watch out this man may be dangerous? Was it a “heads up this man may ask you out but I don’t think it’s a good idea”? Is the minister trying to set you guys up? Why would they allow a member they think may be dangerous to you in the church while you are there? There are so many questions unanswered here.

      1. He wanted to ask me if the guy had been creepy or inappropriate and to give me a heads up. He knows the guy and seemed fairly certain that he’s harmless but I don’t know that!

      2. Exactly. I’ve read this three times and still have no idea what is going on. Is the minister picking up on problems with this guy not getting the hint or fixating on you? Or is the minister being a little busybody and trying to create drama or create romance?

    4. Avoid leaving church events alone. Keep a record of interactions – this can easily be done by sending yourself an email and adding after each interaction. If something does become an issue, it gives a timestamped record of documented interactions. Check in with the Minister is a few days to see if he has anything to add.

    5. Does the man know where you live/work, or can he access that info? Is there a concern about stalking? Your minister’s language sounded pretty strong.

      1. He may know where I work. It’s pretty common knowledge at the church. But he would have no way of finding out where I live

        1. You are probably staying late given your work with the church, but if it were me, I would also want to doubly ensure he cannot follow me home. Yes, it’s an inconvenience and I think this should be done in tandem with talking to your minister for assistance and asking for the minister to shut it down/ensure you feel safe… but in the meantime, just remember that if you feel someone is following you, you can just keep driving and drive on over to the police station. I would make sure your minister and friends are aware and keep a buffer around you when you are there — and to be aware in case he asks them questions about you. If anyone speaks to him about respecting your boundaries, I would think it should be the minister. I agree that it’s on him to make sure you feel safe. I’d approach him again and ask what specifically concerned him and if he is vague, then say that you expect to feel safe as an employee and if your minister can’t guarantee that then you want to know if this is something you should file a restraining order about. (No need to say this in a huff or rudely — hard to type out tone — but more in the “I’m worried/brainstorming how to be proactive about my safety” tone. I don’t know whether the police would do it on not much information, but the point is to alert your minister to be prioritizing your safety.) The words “unhealthy obsession” are concerning to me and signal that it must have been something more than him saying, “She’s my favorite! I’m so glad to be here for the Christmas service because she has such a beautiful voice!” Also, I’m sorry!

        2. You don’t have a church directory? If he can get your phone number, he can get your address for a few dollars online.

    6. It doesn’t seem like much you can do. I would think he gave you the heads up so you can continue to not interact with the person in question, but aside from avoiding him, I don’t know that there is much else to be done.

      1. Sadly: This may be true. If the guy is existing / obsessed, that’s not really actionable. Avoid as best you can and don’t engage. But if he is acting in ways that are overt / threatening, then you can take reactive steps. In the meantime: try to park in well-lit places and don’t go to/from church alone. How likely is it that he knows your home address?

      2. I’ve asked friends to come get me if they see him trying to interact. One of the other soloists is a student and he wanted to set the guy straight but I don’t think that’s appropriate.

        1. The Gift of Fear discusses how some interventions like this can actually make the person more determined. Sometimes they have a delusion about being ill-fated lovers, or that others are conspiring against them. (This could also be the result if he were kicked out of the congregation.) I think the book would advise to not engage this at all, or acknowledge anything to the man involved, but also to take measures like not being alone with him.

          1. Thanks. All important thoughts. I think the minister is the only one who can intervene.

    7. So since you’re a church employee, I think the minister has obligations here that might be different than if you were just a member of the congregation. At my prior church, we had a member who was extremely verbally abusive to our organist, and our priest did in fact tell him that he had to cut it out or leave the parish. When you are an employee, the minister isn’t just your pastor – he’s your employer. I would suggest that you go back to the minister and ask him for more information about the situation and also ask him specifically what he is planning to do. Because if he thinks this situation is concerning (and he obviously does, since he warned you) he has an obligation to do something about it. What that something is will depend on what’s going on.

      From a religious perspective, I believe that’s true whether you’re an employee or not – the minister of a congregation should not be turning a blind eye to actions by one congregant that are making another uncomfortable or unsafe. But from a legal perspective, I suspect the fact that you’re an employee makes a difference here.

      1. Thanks. I think that’s why my friend was so angry. She feels like the church has an obligation to make it a safe environment for me.

  10. This is a question with a seemingly obvious answer; trust me, I’m not sure why this is so hard. I’m a lawyer in a small non-NYC biglaw office. I frequently have back to back calls for hours at a time. It’s all I can do to take literally 2 minutes between calls to use the restroom. I’m in very high demand and partners, associates, and staff alike will catch me in the hallway for “just one thing” that is never just one thing. I will explain, “I’m sorry I have literally two minutes before my next call!” But they will keep talking to my back and get very offended when I hurry away. What do you do about this? I can’t just not use the restroom for 6 hours.

    1. Are you sure they’re getting very offended? Sometimes I have to remind myself that it’s not always important that people be happy about everything I do — sure, they’d prefer if you had time to talk to them, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re mad AT you. If they don’t confront you about it, I’d chalk it up to their being momentarily annoyed/disappointed, but you don’t have to do anything about that, any more than you’d have to find a solution if they were disappointed because they called your office and you didn’t pick up because you were on another line.

      1. Do not engage at all even for “just one thing.” You say “I’m just running to the ladies room in between calls. You can email me or stop by after X when my call should be wrapped up.” And do not engage any further. Agree with the poster above that yes they are annoyed, just like they are annoyed when you don’t answer the phone because you’re on the other line. But that doesn’t mean they hold it against you.

    3. I get this alot; I started walking around with my headset still on my head- even though it’s out of range. It helps to signal- I am not available but can we chat later.

    4. Hugs. I too have issues with the toilet and my co-workers stopping me in the hall when I am trying to pee or poop before getting back to my depos and conference calls with the court and opposing council. It is very difficult, particularly for women, as we cannot just run into the toilet, point and shoot into a urinal and get back to our jobs like men. Besides, Roberta is often using the toilet all afternoon when I come in making it even more difficult for me. FOOEY! We need more toilets in our ladies room.

  11. Ok remind me — as a holiday gift to my assistant, can I just write her a check for $100, or is that tacky, does it have to be a gift card?

    1. We do a pretty decent party with gifts for everyone and cabs+childcare, gift cards around the holidays and bonuses and individual lawyers can do whatever they want.

    2. This may be a state-by-state thing, but do check it out — in mine, that would be considered taxable income. For that reason, people go the gift card route.

    3. given with some warm words, this is fine. If you want to make it look a little more festive, Trader Joe’s has holiday cards for $1.

      1. Oh for sure I’m putting it in a holiday card, haha, not just handing it to her. :)

      1. Yeah, I’m partial to nice new $100 bills.

        It’s a pain to go to the bank for them but I think it’s worth it.

  12. Vent- So I got a ticket confirmation about symphony tickets today. Total surprise. And my husband never does anything like that so I was very happy because we have not gone in years. Wasn’t sure if he arranged a babysitter or if I was going with a friend but it seemed really nice.

    Anyway they are not my tickets, they are his parents tickets (we have the same last name so they emailed the wrong people the confirmation). So that kinda sucks for everyone except his parents.

    1. Can you tell your husband what happened and how you’re feeling, that you thought they were your tickets and were psyched and then bummed they were actually for his parents? He probably has never even thought of getting you symphony tickets but hopefully if you put it on his radar he will!

      1. It is what it is. TBH I was pretty happy about life until this happened and now I’m bitter for multiple reasons. Lol it was a happy to disappointed reaction in twenty minutes.

        The parents don’t babysit for us (our kid is special needs) so we don’t go out often because we just don’t have many options. This month has been unusual because of the number of functions for the season so I’ve gone out twice from 5-9PM (with a paid babysitter) so that’s been awesome. Before the kidlet we went to the opera and symphony and other stuff all the time.

    4. It could be worse? I totally thought this was headed in the “he’s having an affair” direction. But seriously, talk to him.

  13. We will be in Montreal for six nights over Christmas. Having dinner with old friends one evening, and they will pick the place. Any must dos? We are staying in a hotel on Phillips Square and are pretty active. I would love to go sledding one day but we will need to rent sleds. thanks in advance.

    1. If you eat meat you want to get a smoked meat sandwich. Maybe check out the biodome.

    2. By all means visit the Basilica (maybe for a Christmas service if you’re into that sort of thing?) and make sure to check out the gorgeous gilded chapel behind the altar.

      1. Most paths/stairs are closed this time of the year. I went a few years back and had to do lots of scampering through the wood and climb a fence when eh path was shut off…

  14. Do you all use Amazon boxes to wrap gifts in? They seem so ugly/unwieldy but also it feels weird not to use them when we have a ton of them all over the house…

    1. Oh most definitely. We do put tissue paper in them to nestle the gift into, but the thought of buying MORE cardboard (as many stores are starting to charge for gift boxes, at least when shopping online) just for the sake of a slightly more attractive box… nope.

    3. Absolutely. I just end up switching items and putting them in appropriately sized boxes, and recycle the remainder. Amazon tends to ship their things in absurdly large boxes, so I usually don’t wrap in the one it came in.

    4. Yes, with no hesitation. But for context, we also use leftover Y2K-era graduation or extra baby shower paper to wrap holiday and birthday gifts.

    5. I’ve used one so far this year. We’ve had a few sets of those decorated shirt boxes for years and years and have reused them many times so they’re our go-tos because they don’t require additional wrapping. The amazon boxes get used when the item in question doesn’t fit in one of the shirt boxes.

  16. I am also on Team Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy, but Matthew McFadyen is amazing in Succession, and is so completely one with the role I didn’t even realize he was Darcy II.

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