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I always like a good huggie earring — they're so comfortable to wear, are small and work-appropriate but have a bit more personality than your basic stud, and are incredibly versatile. I like the look of these small carved hoop earrings, on sale today at Last Call — they were $225, but are now marked to $110. Ron Hami Carved Small Huggie Hoop Earrings
(L-2)
Sales of note for 9.10.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Save up to 40% on new markdowns
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- White House Black Market – 30% off new arrivals
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Anon in charge
Politically tricky situation at work:
Head of my Department got a promotion 2 years ago, to COO. One of my peers, A, who is much more senior than me, was promoted to lead the department. Our COO pulled me out to report to her directly; A struggled to lead the department and eventually was offered a new role elsewhere in the company. Her job was posted, and my boss/the COO and our CEO asked me to take it. I’ve been running the department, still reporting to the COO, for about a year. COO just called me into her office and let me know she wants A to come back…and report into me.
A is not going to take this well, as she already thinks I “stole” her job (she wasn’t doing well, they created a new role for her where she also didn’t do well, and meanwhile, my department did a complete 180 with me in charge vs A). Any advice on how to approach this? I have my fingers and toes crossed that A decides to seek opportunities elsewhere. We don’t have a bad relationship, but I think this would be hard for anyone.
RR
There’s only so much you can do and, for me, it begins and ends with you being professional. Obviously, it’s a super awkward situation for A, but that’s not your fault, your responsibility, or your problem. There’s nothing you can say to her to make this less awkward. If she comes into your department, treat her as one of your team, with respect and professionalism, and let her make the decision she wants to make. Hopefully, for everyone’s sake, that decision is to find another opportunity.
Meg Murry
Is there some specific part of her job that she was good at in your department? Would it be better politically for you and the COO if a role be created for her to do that specific piece of the job, and have the reporting relationship be parallel to you (reporting directly to the COO on paper, with no direct reports)? Some kind of “Senior Director of XYZ widget project” role?
Otherwise, all you can do is be gracious, and be kind to her and express any concerns or differences you have behind closed doors.
Are there people in the department with more loyalty to her than you, that might try to sabotage or otherwise undermine you in a show of loyalty to her?
OP
That was my pitch (dotted line) but COO wants her under me for exactly the reason my department runs well now- the structure etc that I brought is why she is failing.
Anonymous
You’re running the dept. I’d start by telling the COO you don’t want A back. She’s disruptive and not good at the job.
Must be Tuesday
This.
OP
She could end up being a good do-er, with mentor ship. She isn’t a leader.
I also said “if you want me to take her just to fire her, you aren’t fit to be our COO.” We agreed that if it wasn’t going to work in my dept, my boss would fire her.
ss
It sounds like your firm has already given this employee multiple opportunities where she can contribute – if she doesn’t take it, she needs to go. If you want to mentor her, go for it. If you don’t, no need for platitudes about what she ‘could be’ or hiding behind your boss, just assess her performance objectively after she’s been in the new role awhile and then do the necessary.
This is what it means to be a manager, I’m afraid.
HR U
Her specialty may just be the position that she once had, without the “leading” part. Some people struggle with leadership roles. Could she shine as part of your team with the job description that works with her strengths.
She is joining a team that you have strengthened and supported. The team she meets will not be the same as when she left for the other position, and if you have developed good will with your team, they’ll support success with you. If everyone can move beyond the past and give her a solid start, she may shine again.
Assessment focuses on current job performance, including communication that facilitates team success. You are not competing with her, her success is within her new role. Encourage that. Kill the gossip.
anyanony
I think you sit down with her upon her return, outline her priorities and your expectations, state that you hope to have a good working relationship and let the chips fall where they may. If she doesn’t want to report to you and the big boss isn’t letting her go, I might suspect that boss wants you to do the dirty work and fire her if you can’t rehabilitate her. So you may need to have a conversation with your boss to make sure that their expectations and yours are similar.
Ellen
Yay! Coffee Break! I love these hoop earing’s, Kat. I need a boyfreind tho to give these to me or my dad will say I am being foolish b/c the manageing partner will NOT reimburse me for earing’s! FOOEY! I think he think’s that if Margie found out I was getting earing’s from the manageing partner that she would think I am being romantic with him. DOUBEL FOOEY b/c I could NEVER be romantic with the manageing partner. He has been nice to me but the thought of him huffeing and puffeing on top of me is NOT something I could EVER even think of doeing! TRIPEL FOOEY!
Mason somehow erased some of my case file’s! I can’t believe he could do that. It is very lucky that I had Lynn keep a backup UBS STICK with my files on it and update it every Friday. So actueally, we have NOT lost to much, just what I did today b/c I did NO work over the weekend for him to loose. Mason is a mess. I felt like NOT telling him and makeing him recreate the files, but I was nice and told him. He was practically pooping in his pants when he did that. I will talk to the teck guy’s about putting in a warning in the program b/f a file is erased asking for us to be SURE we want to delete before we do that. What a schmoe he is, tho. And now I have to deal with the teck guy, who has bad breathe and love’s to stare at my boobie’s. FOOEY!
Myrna and her freind are comeing over b/c Myrna might want to buy my place if I move to the 3 bedroom place Dad wants me to live in. I realy do NOT want to moove there, tho the place is big enough for 5 people. Dad think’s if I have a place like this, I will be abel to get a rich guy to MARRY me. I said there would be alot of deadbeat’s looking to sponge off of me if they found out I had that place. Beside’s, I do NOT want to pay that kind of maintnance. FOOEY! They do NOT even have an indoor pool, which is where I would most likeley find a guy with my string bikinis. They do have privilege’s for the tennis court’s nearby, so that’s a plus. Dad say’s that I can be very cute in my short white tennis outfit, and guys will come to me like bees to honey. I do NOT want them buzzing around me and sniffeing where they should NOT be sniffeing. FOOEY!
Why can’t I find a decent guy to marry me without me having to be sexy? I do have a MIND, after all, tho I am NOT getteing any credit for it any more. TRIPEL FOOEY! Is there no smart man out there who can take me for what I am? HELP!
Colored Pants
If you wear colored pants to the office (since the same people see you every day), what’s your rotation time? I’m trying to decided how often is too often for price per wear.
Let’s say, bolder than navy but not neon pink. Kelly green, red, burnt orange, etc.
Dress code doesn’t come into play for my office.
AMB
I have cobalt/kelly green/coral (only for summer Fridays) and I try to keep each colour to no more than once a month. It helps that I have a variety obviously…
Meg Murry
I think a variety of colors might actually make it less noticable than if you normally only wear black, grey and navy and then every so often break out the kelly green.
It also makes a difference if other people in your office are also wearing colored pants from time to time, or if you’d be “that woman that wears green pants”. If others do it, it becomes far less noticable than if its just you.
It also makes a difference whether they are ok for everyday wear at your office or if they would be Fridays only. If Fridays only, I think having 2-3 colors (plus maybe some Friday neutrals) to rotate through would be less noticable.
But FWIW, the only time I notice when someone is re-wearing something is when I really liked it or really hated it – if they wear something that blends in with what everyone else wears its very “meh” to me.
Ginjury
I’d say once every two weeks is the most you could wear them, so that at least a full work week went by where you did not wear them. It also depends on what other bottoms you wear and how big of a deviation it is from your typical uniform (if you have one).
HSAL
Yep, I’m in the every two weeks camp.
houston, we have a problem
this is what I would do.
AIMS
I think it depends on the rest of your wardrobe. If you’re someone who wears a lot of prints, no particular one will be that memorable. Same with colors. But if you’re usually a neutrals kind of person, they probably will stick out more. That said, I think you’d still be fine with once a week because no one is going to be sitting there memorizing what you wear week to week. I can barely remember what I’ve worn myself. The only exception I’d toss in is if you’re planning to wear them the same way on, say, Fridays. That can get a little noticeable. There used to be a woman I worked with who wore suits everyday and the same floral skirt with a black top every Friday. It got to the point where I would see her and think, “Yep, must be Friday!”
Must be Tuesday
I aim for no more than twice a month, but sometimes I wear them weekly. It helps that I have a few different pairs of brightly colored pants (cobalt, purple, pine green, bright red), and that I wear each color with several different tops.
Colored Pants
Thanks, all!
It’s not just for Fridays (good point), and my wardrobe is normally pretty neutral (another excellent point). I’m thinking I could plan for 2-3 times/month.
I like the idea of getting a couple of different colors to mix in.
P
Quick question (especially for those in NYC) – I have an interview this evening at a small law firm. I’m wearing a skirt suit and debating whether to wear pantyhose. I know that’s generally the safe choice, but it’s above 80 degrees right now, so I don’t know if it’s still an expectation, whether they’d understand if I didn’t, or whether it might actually look out of place to wear them on such a hot day?
I know I’m overthinking this but I would appreciate the input!
Emily
Not an expectation. Good luck!
Anon in NYC
Personally, I would wear sheer hose because I like it and I would feel more polished and confident. That said, I don’t think I have ever looked at a candidate’s legs and I don’t think whether or not she wore hose would ever weigh on my decision to hire her.
mascot
Not NYC, but from somewhere that is hot and humid a good bit of the year. Wear stockings. I’d say that it is an expectation of conservative formal business wear. Temperature doesn’t enter into the equation IMO unless they are interviewing you outside. Even then, I’d still deal with the temporary discomfort.
NYC tech
I’d say yes, wear the pantyhose, but pick very sheer ones.
P
Thank you all! I guess consensus says yes; better to be safe (and hot) than sorry.
A
It’s actually pleasant outside at the moment. Not hot at all, nice and breezy.
Emily
I’m going to a casual party to celebrate a marriage that occurred over the winter. Any ideas on a fun thoughtful gift that goes in line with “no presents, just your presence” such that I am acknowledging their milestone and also the fact that they’re hosting a party?
I’m bringing my SO.
TO Lawyer
Champagne? Or a nice bottle of wine? Or maybe a gift card to a favourite restaurant?
Meg Murry
At their house? A bottle of wine or similar hostess-y gift. At a restaurant or other location? A card if you haven’t already sent one. You could include a gift card if you wanted to, but if they say “no presents” take them at their word, or send a present directly to their house at a different time. Showing up with a wrapped present to a “no presents” party makes everyone feel awkward – you, the host, and the other guests who listened to the instructions.
mascot
“Showing up with a wrapped present to a “no presents” party makes everyone feel awkward – you, the host, and the other guests who listened to the instructions.” This is so true.
D. Meagle
Alcohol and monogrammed glasses, or engraved with anniversary date. Nice picture frame. Can’t go wrong with those.
Anonymous
Sure you can! Some people just don’t want more crap in their space. I’m a gifter but if people specifically ask you not to, don’t.
A Nonny Moose
+1. I don’t have room for even two more engraved glasses. Go card, they asked for no gifts. Gift card to a restaurant or place they’re registered if you really must bring something.
Kelly Andthenblog
+1
Please, no wedding date or couple themed things, even if it’s just a monogram. The “wedding gift” picture frames I see are, IMHO, not attractive nor would they go with my taste, and I can’t be the only one.
Hildegarde
I agree! No wedding date items. They said no gifts, so take them at their word. Bring a card if you must. Whenever I have had friends who said no gifts, they meant it.
nutella
Not the only one.
They are telling you their tastes and preferences; follow accordingly.
Anon
+1 Seriously. Tacky.
Parfait
I think you’re wrong on this one. Engraved things can’t be returned, and I don’t think Goodwill shoppers really want anything with someone else’s names and wedding date on it either.
Anonymous
For goodness sake no gift. They said no gift. Give them a card. Celebrate.
la vie en bleu
If they said no presents, I agree with a hostess gift-type thing. A bottle of wine or maybe some other consumable, with a nice card tying it to their wedding somehow. Like a nice bottle of wine with “for your first anniversary.” Or a jar of fancy honey with “honey for a sweet life together”.
Kelly
If they said no presents, then they meant no presents! Why are you people coming up with bottles of wine or gift cards or anything else? Maybe they don’t like junk – you know, junk like silver picture frames with their wedding anniversary date engraved on it (they know when they got married, and if they need a picture frame, they’ll go get one!).
la vie en bleu
Because by no presents I’m assuming they mean no wedding presents. But if I go to someone’s house for a party they are hosting, I don’t go empty handed.
Anon
Hope I’m not too late. If you want to get her a non gift gift, make a donation in the couple’s honor to American Red Cross or another organization helping in Nepal, and give it to her quietly, privately and without fanfare.
I had a no gifts wedding (both my and my husbands’s second marriage) and appreciated thoughtful gestures like this.
MB
I recently graduated and will be starting a job as a financial risk consultant (60-80% travel) next month. I’m having trouble deciding on the best work bag that can go from meetings with clients, carry on for the plane (in addition to a small suitcase for clothes) as well as serve as a purse since I will not have room for additional bags while travelling. I’m leaning towards either a Tumi tote or the Lo & Sons TT or Brookline. Any recommendations? I want to look professional but am trying to avoid the “briefcase” look.
Thanks ladies!
West Coast
Consultant with a TUMI tote and love it. What makes it great:
– top zip
– big enough for a 15″ laptop – make sure to know dimensions of the laptop your firm will give you
– coated canvas material- resistant to abuse and cleans easily
– good number of interior pockets
– has the travel strap that attaches to the suitcase handle
– not too much bigger than my colleagues’ laptop bags
– feet on the bottom to protect
– looks high quality
Most of us also carry a small clutch or crossbody that we stick in the tote, so we can leave the tote when we go to lunch, dinner, etc.
2 Cents
Jewelry rant:
A month ago, the main diamond in my engagement ring popped out of its setting. Thank goodness I was at home, and it had a very limited area to be in when I noticed.
Just now: a tiny diamond in the bracelet my husband got me for Valentine’s Day fell out *somewhere* at work. WTH!? How come my cheapo jewelry never has any issues, but my real stuff is breaking all around me??? /pityparty/
On a related note, can any of you suggest a trusted jeweler in the Long Island / NYC area who’s good with fixes? I’ve got two pieces so far…
Ellen
Hugs to you. But at least you are MARRIED! Yay! I have no one but guy’s that want sex. FOOEY. I do NOT know the value of your jewelery, but the NY Magazine recomends as Best Jewelry Repair
Ray Griffiths
303 Fifth Ave., at 31st St., Ste. 1910; 212-689-7209; raygriffiths.com
As a young jeweler, Ray Griffiths was trained to make and repair intricate pieces of the British-peer variety. Thirty years later, he’s beyond expert at restoring vintage pieces and evaluating old stones for recutting. Nearly all work is done in-house, and he doesn’t automatically brush off small jobs. (Quotes start at $500.) Currently on his workbench: a damaged 1850s diamond-bow brooch, part of a suite belonging to a European family; a gem-encrusted fifties charm bracelet; and a grandmother’s engagement ring, on which he’s updating the setting and adding stones for a young fiancée. “It was $2,500 for the refurbish, and I gave her a ring worth around $15,000,” Griffiths says.
If your stuff is any good, go here. Otherwise, you can always go to Kay Jewelers or places in the Manhassat Mall, but those guys just love to stare at us and wish it were them that were in our beds at night. FOOEY on men like that!
Mpls
Did you use gold in your expensive stuff, and maybe it’s too soft?
2 Cents
My engagement ring is gold, but I don’t believe the actual prongs holding the stone are. That would be good to investigate. And I wear everything possible on my left hand (I’m right handed). Maybe it’s all just bad timing!
Meg Murry
Does it stick out far, and do you wear the jewelry on your dominant hand? My mother is left handed, and managed to pop the stone out of her engagement ring 3 times – after the 3rd time she gave up and went back to wearing just her plain gold band and had the stone from the engagement ring re-set into a pendant.
Anonymous
Frivolous beauty question: I’m going to Vegas to celebrate a big birthday soon. I’m planning to go to the Rent the Runway showroom there to pick out dresses to wear while I’m there. But I want to get a mani/pedi done in advance, because that kind of thing is super pricey in Vegas. So what colors should I go with for my fingernails and toenails if I don’t know what color my dresses will be? Are white nails still trendy? I feel like they were huge a year or two ago.
Anonymous
Dark cherry or nude. Or french (not everyone likes french but it is a classic option). Don’t do white, white looks dated imo.
Pretty Primadonna
Nude is always in as is pale pink. I don’t think white is dated, but others may. You might also try black.
Maddie Ross
Short of it being my wedding or something, I don’t really give my nail color much, if any, thought as to whether it “matches.” Nude/beige/pale pink always look good to me on fingers. On toes, I’m all about the fun – teal blue is my current fav.
First Year Anon
If you want to be super “I am in Vegas flashy”, I have used a multi-colored glitter (so much glitter that it’s opaque) and it’s really fun for things like this. Or you can do an all silver or all-gold glitter.
Anonymous
yes – or a pink/nude base with a solid glitter (gold, silver, sparkly pink) on top to jazz it up
First Year Anon
very nice!
Rowan
You’re in Vegas. Go metallic. Forget tasteful and matching.
Montgomery, AL
This is probably a longshot – but does anyone have any advice for housing in Montgomery, Alabama? I am moving there temporarily for work (for a year), and I’m a little overwhelmed (or really, underwhelmed) with housing options. I’m looking for something small (1 bedroom or even a studio). I’m heading down next month to check it out in person, but I’d love any advice the hive might have!
anp3474
I’ve lived in Montgomery for several years now and I’m happy to help you find a place to live. Feel free to email me at anp3474 at gmail dot com.
Pretty Primadonna
Off topic: Does anyone have a Bloomingdale’s coupon code? My wallet thanks you in advance!
Wildkitten
What are the best tips and resources for meal planning healthy meals? I am a terrible cook – so the easier the better.