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Updated: Aug 17, 2021 279 Comments · by

Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Ruffled Snake-Print Crepe Blouse

The Personal Shopper (TPS) |

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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

The snakeskin print has long been one of my favorite neutrals, and this ruffled crepe blouse is such a gorgeous example of why.

For a really sleek, polished look, I would wear this tucked into a black pencil skirt or pair of trousers. For a more casual office, I might wear this untucked with a pair of black skinny jeans.

The top is $155 at Net-a-Porter and comes in sizes XXS–XL.

ASOS has a snake-print blouse for $40 in lucky sizes 12–26.

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Sales of note for 9.30.24

Sales of note for 9.30.24

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

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About Elizabeth

Elizabeth is a 30-something lawyer living on the East Coast. She spent seven years as a Biglaw associate in NYC, three years as a partner at a medium-sized firm, and is now in-house counsel for a large company. She loves Diet Coke, '90s sitcoms, and dresses with pockets.

Comments

  1. Anon

    Heading to Nashville for the first time this weekend, staying at the Omni. Any recommendations? I like good food and exploring new cities by foot wherever possible. May also try to get a spa treatment in.

    • Nashvillian

      If you haven’t made dinner reservations, get on and do it now if you can. You may be able to pick up a reservation last minute on Friday or Saturday afternoon, or sit at that bar somewhere and wait, but it’s gotten pretty crazy to get in for dinner between 5 and 9pm every night. If you for some reason can’t get reservations or get in, go to the Assembly Hall at Fifth & Broadway and try the food court. So many good local options, plus a bar.

      What kind of food do you like? My favs downtown are Etch, The Farm House, and Husk. The Gulch has a bunch of good options now too (Marsh House, 404 Kitchen). And there are steakhouses a plenty. 12th South is fun to walk around in and has good restaurants (Josephine is my nice fav, Edley’s BBQ is good too). You’ll probably want to Uber a fair bit. Nashville neighborhoods are getting more walkable, but it’s hard to get in between them.

      If I were you, I would stay far away from Broadway, but you do you. If you go, just be prepared for chaos.

    • FP

      I live here and work next to the Omni – it’s Covid-central right now so just be prepared for that. Masks are not really required anywhere. Martin’s BBQ across from the Omni is great if you are looking for that. Downtown restaurants can be very touristy so you may want to consider Ubering to a neighborhood to walk around for an afternoon. East Nashville is great (Uber to the five points area); 12 South has lots to do; and Germantown is a far but walkable distance from downtown. A big food hall just opened at 5th Ave and Broadway (maybe 4 blocks from the Omni) called Assembly Hall and has outposts of lots of local restaurants (The Pharmacy, Hattie B’s, Desano, Thai Esane, Prince’s Hot Chicken) if you want something fast with good people watching.

    • DeepSouth

      plan to Lyft a few places — downtown is SUPER touristy, but there are lots of fun neighborhoods. I echo 12South, but would add Epice. It’s my fave — Lebanese food and a super cool environment.
      Bourbon Steak in the JW has the best view from downtown, but LA Jackson in the Gulch is also a great view of the city. The Optimist in Germantown is great seafood. Geist is a cool old building and has a champagne garden, so a fun, quiet outdoor drink. Edley’s is the best barbecue. Pancho and Lefty’s is a great taco place, just off broadway if you need to sit down a minute and escape the crowd. If you’re doing Broadway, the food is surprisingly good at Miranda Lambert’s bar — Casa Rosa.
      Maneet Chauhaun has 4 Nashville restaurants if you like celeb chefs. 3 are in the gulch and are beautiful. Chauhaun Ale and Masala for Indian, Tansuo for upscale Chinese or Mockinbird is fusion diner/ethnic food. The brunch is GREAT there.
      And yes, make reservations or you aren’t getting into anyplace that’s good.

    • Anon

      I drove through last weekend, and I think every bride in a 500 mile radius was headed that way for a bacheolorette thing (judging from the decorated cars on the interstate).

    • Julie

      We found a great free walking tour online of Nashville. Google “free walking tours Nashville” and bring your headphones. I think we found it here: https://freetoursbyfoot.com/. You are also an 80 minute drive to the largest cave network in the U.S.–Mammouth Cave, but if you decide to go there, you absolutely must have a reservation.

  3. Anonymous

    Gift ideas for my 46 year old boyfriend? He is a “gadget guy,” loves biking and cooking. We live separately but FT nights we aren’t together. His birthday and our 2nd anniversary are coming up – we didn’t really celebrate last year due to covid so no gift precedent.

    • Anonymous

      What about a fancy bike light? Some of the more expensive lights are really nice and much more effective, but they are a little more expensive than a lot of people will spend on themselves.

      • Sloan Sabbith

        Or a bike computer? My uncle who loves biking has a nice one he got at REI.

    • Anon

      A friend of mine was sharing with us once that she rented a sports car for weekend as a gift for her boyfriend (with a weekend getaway). And I have never in my life seen such a resounding “OMG YES! I WOULD MARRY HER IN A MINUTE” response from all the guys in the office. So maybe this is not the perfect gift for your cooking & biking loving BF, but I am putting it out there. If he loves biking, is he doing bike trips with camping? I know plenty of my biking friends (based in Europe) do Scotland or Iceland bike trips and love it. Cooking – my fav gift was a set of professional knives (alhough this may not be culturally appropriate gift everywhere).

      • Anon

        I have a coworker who does this and LOVES it. He saves up to rent a very nice sports car on every vacation he takes.

      • EB

        The app Turo is great for this. We’ve had several great experiences. You can get a luxury car for kind of around the same cost (it’s more, but not a TON more) as a normal rental car.

    • Anonymous

      My husband loves cooking and cooking gadgets, and his sous vide is a real favorite. It’s kind of a bougie slow cooker.

      • Anonnymouse

        This was going to be my suggestion! My fiance got me one (a Joule) and it’s really fun to use! All app-based controls, very cool.

    • Anonymous

      If you aren’t committed to gifting a ‘thing’ there are often a lot of really cool biking weekend vacations in small towns which I think would be perfect for this. Would obviously be location specific so I can’t really give a recommendation.

    • Anonymous

      Cooking:
      Dehydrator, fancy oddities like salt block (for oven cooking), really good meat or sugar thermometer, special size cast iron, tortilla press, sous vide, produce subscription, molecylar gastronomy stuff.

      Bike:
      Camping cooking stuff, heated mittens/gloves if he does winter cycling, maybe a GoPro camera? Fat bike tyres?

  5. LaurenB

    Keep seeing these on my Instagram – has anyone bought either Bala or similar ankle/wrist weights? Feedback? Would use for walking and light aerobics.

    • waffles

      I had thought about doing that too, but I read on “Dr. Internet” (I know…) that walking with ankle weights is not recommended, as it can strain joints and muscles. I already have bad hips and knees so I decided against it. Your experience may differ, but just thought I would throw it out there, as it wasn’t something that I was aware of previously.

      here’s one source: https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/fitness/expert-answers/ankle-weights/faq-20058222

      • Anonymous

        I also consulted Dr. Google about ankle weights and came to the same conclusion. Aerobics with ankle weights would be even worse than walking.

    • Monday

      I use them with low-impact mat exercises like plank variations and leg lifts. I just bought whatever Target had, I don’t know the brand, 1.5 lbs each.

      • Anon

        I have an acquaintance who is a PT who uses them for low impact body weight exercises.

        I have a friend who wears the wrist ones while she walks and kind of pumps her arms. It’s very suburban mall walking mom, except its 20 somethings in Manhattan

  6. Anonymous

    Hi all! Looking for some advice. I volunteer with a Junior League that runs a thrift store. All proceeds go to our League, we have no paid staff or paid board members (if that matters). Our racks are all donated items. Is it “legal/ok” to pull a page from a magazine or print something from an article and put it next to a mannequin – sort of like, see, this is in style? Next question is could we do that on social media? We would be happy to tag the magazine if that’s better – we get shoppers who ask how fo make things “current” and we were thinking a magazine or screenshot side by side could help. I just don’t want them to get in trouble!

      • Anonymous

        If anyone ever called and fussed, I guess you would have the nice lawyer on the board (that was always me) point out that we could definitely use [their competitor] as our example of who best knows and shows current fashion, but we thought they were more accessible and dynamic and would they like to have some good social-media feel-good stories that we’d be happy to collaborate on? They could fuss, but you get to be in SELL MODE to your distinct advantage.

    • Anon

      I’m not sure about the actual copyright law on this issue, but I think that the odds of a magazine coming after a charity thrift store for doing what you describe is VERY low.

      • anon

        I’m not sure about the actual copyright law on this issue, but I think that the odds of a magazine coming after a charity thrift store for doing what you describe is VERY low.

    • LaurenB

      On social media, can’t you say something like “Vogue magazine says that one-shouldered purple tweed jumpsuits are the latest trend for fall 2021, and we’ve got plenty of them in our boutique / resale shop for you!” How is that problematic?

  7. Anonymous

    Realized last night none of my fall pants zip. Hello, floaty dresses in midi lengths and fall colors! If you’ve found a favorite (preferably under $70), please share! I know links can be tough so I’ll check back tonight. I’m a size 8- well, 8-10 now.

  8. Anonymous

    I posted many months ago about my best friend’s manchild husband asking if it’s possible he will ever change. Newsflash, he didn’t, his laziness would be comical if it weren’t so damaging, and now my friend is saying “I’m worried you don’t like him” after a conversation where I said “that’s bullsh*t” when she told me about his latest excuse for not doing basic childcare while my friend is in recovery from a painful surgery. Sigh. I don’t admit to not liking him, right?

    • Anonymous

      How about ‘I don’t know the details of your relationship but I feel like he’s not being a good partner to you now’. Keep the comment focused on the current situation, don’t issue a broad critique of the relationship or the person.

    • Go for it

      Hmmm
      A blatant lie would not float, how about “I find him challenging” if pressed. That says truth without full on condemning.
      ( I am assuming she knows you are not a fan)

      • Anonymous

        She knows I don’t think their division of labor is equal, but I don’t think she knows it has made me full-on dislike him (there are other reasons too, all related, but I definitely won’t be going into that with her…).

          • Anonymous

            I think he is not only a manchild, but fundamentally selfish and kind of stunted. I’ve known him for six years, spent a few vacations with him, and in that time he has NEVER, not once, asked me a single question about how my life is going – not “how are you” or “how’s work” or “I’m sorry your dog died” or anything. I saw them recently and had planned a nice hike for my best friend and me (she loves hiking and hasn’t gotten to do much since the baby was born), but he wanted to go do his own hobby instead despite the fact that he had gotten the entire day off to do the hobby just the day before (while I helped watch the baby). He wasn’t willing to come back from his hobby after just 2 hours so we could do our hike. That was kind of the final straw for me – he couldn’t even be there for a measly 1-2 hours so his wife and I could catch up and she could FINALLY do an activity she loves to do with her best friend.

          • Anon

            Yuck. That completely makes sense why you don’t like him AND why you don’t want to say anything: it’s a low level, ongoing problem.

            Focus on how this hurts your friend in really egregious circumstances.

      • Senior Attorney

        I think this is good and honest and leaves the door open for plausible deniability.

    • No Problem

      You don’t admit to not liking him, you admit to not liking his behaviors or excuses for poor behaviors. “It’s surprising and disappointing to me that an adult human said he couldn’t figure out how to make the kids dinner on his own when you were unable to do so. The directions for making mac and cheese are on the side of the box! And that he doesn’t know how to give a kid a bath. Does he really not know how to apply soap to a washcloth? Or how to dress the kids. Does he not understand how to open dresser drawers and pick out a shirt? It is really hard for me to believe that he couldn’t do any of these things to support you while you were recovering.”

      • Anonymous

        You don’t vent to a sick friend about her crap husband. “I’m just worried about you” gives the same message but in a way it will be heard and not turn off the hearer. She knows. Believe me, she knows.

        • No Problem

          I’m assuming friend has sufficiently recovered by this point. If not, sure, wait until she’s back on her feet.

          I’m also assuming the friend was telling her the excuses her husband was making and was either also believing them and looking for confirmation of that, or looking for commiseration that the excuses were unreasonable, so putting words around the absurdity of the excuses is exactly what she needs. The point is…you don’t say you don’t like the husband, you say you don’t like his behaviors because he’s not supporting her.

          • Anonymous

            In that case, still never say you don’t like him. Just say, “Girl, my third-grader could come over and show him how to do X.” Agree without agreeing.

      • Anon

        This is really bad advice. Saying that to somebody about their husband would be really over the top. I get that’s it annoying and frustrating to hear about and OP should probably just try to change the conversation when he comes up for the good of preserving the friendship. Like everyone’s mother has said since the beginning of time, if you can’t say anything nice don’t say anything at all.

    • Anonymous

      “From what you’ve told me, he is putting your health at risk and that makes me concerned.”

      • Elle

        +1. I needed this from a family member to realize my ex wasn’t being a good partner. It wasn’t the final straw but it did open my eyes to things I had been willfully ignoring

    • Anon

      It’s ruined a friendship to me. They’re now divorced, but the damage is done. My friend and I love and respect each other, but when you have had a rift its just really hard to repair. Don’t do it. First commenter has a good script

      • Bonnie Kate

        +1. My husband has ruined two friendships this way. I’m normally really good about not explicitly judging other’s relationships (or telling them about it anyway), but I slipped up in this spring when a good friend was telling me she had decided to (finally) divorce her husband and I figured I could tell her what I thought (that divorce was 100% the right answer), and then it’s been almost radio silence for the last few months. Through a mutual good friend I learned she was considering staying with her husband. ;akdjf;lkjadf;kjadfo;ij terrible idea, but it’s her life and now she knows I think she’s doing it wrong because I explicitly told her what I thought. I’m not beating myself up, but am learning the lesson that the best thing to say when it comes to friend’s relationships is “oh that sucks!” even when it seems like it’s over.

      • anon

        DH fell out with his best friend for not putting up with friend’s wife’s BS. The friends reconciled after the divorce and have been close since. But during the marriage they definitely stopped being friends.

    • anon

      +1 to the scripts that focus on his actions right now, and how they impact the friend. I like “I feel like he’s not being a good partner,” or “It seems like he’s asking you to put your health at risk.”

    • Anon

      People have offered good scripts. I have a friend who has been in one bad relationship after another the entire time we’ve been friends (over 20 years) and is now in an unhappy marriage she complains about constantly. I have learned the answer to questions from her like “What do you think about him,” “What do you think about that,” “What do you think I should do,” etc. is “I don’t think what I think is important; the important thing is, what do YOU think about (X)?” So far it has not resulted in her making changes, gaining insight, or ceasing to ask me the question(s) but it allows me to respond without painting myself into a corner by giving an answer. Before she got married, she was with an absolutely ridiculously terrible guy who was emotionally manipulative and cheated on her constantly and I made the mistake of saying “This guy is not a good guy and this relationship is not healthy for you.” She didn’t talk to me for six months. I won’t make that mistake again.

      • Anonymous

        I’m in a similar position and honestly I’ve thought it would be a blessing in disguise for her to get so mad at me that she stops talking to me. It’s exhausting to listen to complaints about the jerk du jour. If she’s not complaining then she’s too distraught to even leave the house and will cancel at the last minute. And if things are going well with the guy then she’s MIA. I don’t get nearly enough of her good side to justify all the drama.

    • Anonymous

      Thanks all, appreciate the gut check. I ended up modifying the first script (in the first comment) and it went well. Yesterday’s situation was SO egregious (husband wants help from my friend with routine bedtime while his able-bodied brother is visiting and willing to help while Mom is 8/10 on pain scale dealing with rampant post-surgical complications) that it was easy to point to that and not say anything else.

      • Anon

        Hard agree.

        You can say – I am just worried about you. You can listen and sympathize if she complains about him. You can nod and say “I have noticed that too.” But unless he is being actively abusive, you do not criticize someone’s spouse and stay friends. As my mother likes to say “the only person who gets to criticize him is me.” And the simple fact is that your friend has not decided this is a deal breaker and you do not get to make that decision for her. Presumably she is getting something out of the relationship.

        Imagine the reverse of this situation. Imagine someone came here and said “my spouse’s friend is constantly criticizing me and I think spouse should put a stop to it.” Absolutely everyone would say that yes – spouse should put a stop to it, even if that means ending the friendship.

        As a very general rule – never criticize someone’s spouse or children unless they bring it up. And if they bring it up, you listen and validate but do not use a one-time gripe as an excuse to pile on. (And again – obviously this is different if there is actual abuse and you are intervening.)

    • Anon

      I have been on the receiving end of good friends being willing to have tough conversations with me about a bad relationship, as well as not so good friends lobbing verbal bombs at an S.O. because they didn’t actually think much of either of us.

      Keep it kind, keep it focused on the actual issues at hand, keep it supportive.

    • Anonymous

      I guess I’m not as charitable as the others here. I find it tiresome when friends complain to me endlessly about their husbands and then act shocked and hurt that I have a less than awesome opinion of said husband. No I don’t like him because you have never said a single positive thing about him and I trust that you’re telling the truth. For me to like him, I would have to assume you’re lying. I wouldn’t say any of this to a friend who is sick or recovering from surgery but I would probably file it away for another day. I would tell her that if she wants me to like him then she’s got to tell me some good things too not just bad.

    • Anon

      Story of my life:

      Friend: I finally broke up with him. He’s a habitual liar and he cheated on me again

      Me: he’s the f—-ing worst, you deserve so much better! He’s scum of the earth and I hate him.

      Friend: *gets back together with boyfriend*

      Friend and Boyfriend: Anon is a b1tch. We can’t have her in our lives.

  9. Anon

    After years of being low maintenance, I’ve decided I want to start doing my hair. It’s above the shoulder but below the chin and pretty wavy; I have a really weird wave pattern though (including very flippy ends) so I’m hoping heat treatment might help it look better. I consider myself Bain but low maintenance – I want to look good but don’t want to put a ton of effort into looking good.

    I’m really intrigued by the dyson air wrap that I could use one tool to do all of my styling and that it’s supposed to really cut down on time. However, as someone who doesn’t do my hair I don’t want to jump into a several dollar tool (I make less than most here, so that’s a HUGE investment for something I don’t know I’ll use). I have tge revlon styler which I occasionally used with longer hair, but I think the brush is too big for hair as short as mine. Therefore, I’m looking for air wrap dupes. It looks like there’s a ton, so does anyone have recommendations?

    • Anonymous

      Have you tried doing a blowout with a round brush and a regular hairdryer with the concentrator attachment?

      • Anon

        Oh the two handed hair drying is wayyy beyond my abilities. When my stylist does it after a haircut it looks GREAT but it’s too hard for me (and it takes her like 20 minutes!)

        For reference- I dry my hair maybe twice a year; if I style it it’s just going over it with a straightener.

      • anonymous

        You could try the Revlon one step dryer. Much easier than trying to manage a hair dryer and brush.

    • Anon

      I would start with a really good haircut and be realistic about your hair texture vs. local weather conditions. I have curly hair cut into a shoulder length bob – when I blow out/flat iron in midwestern humidity, all of my effort is wasted when I leave the house. If your area has routinely low humidity – then I would be team always blowout! You can blowout on day 1, then dry shampoo for a few days to make your effort last longer.

      • Anon

        I’m pretty lucky that the humidity doesn’t impact my hair too much. I’m in the mid Atlantic so our summers are crazy humid. If I straighten my hair, it’ll pretty much stay except for the flip.

        My stylist is awesome and does a great job (got it cut recently, so it’s a fresh cut) but the flip at the ends is tricky because it’s part of the wave. I’ve only been going to her for about a year so she’s still learning my hair but this haircut is definitely the best yet (and they’ve all been good!)

        I have thin hair (but a TON of it – so it looks thick) so I have to wash it daily. I also workout 6ish days a week so my hair gets smelly if I don’t wash it daily.

        • pugsnbourbon

          I was going to suggest a good haircut too, but it sounds like you have that covered. What about products? And have you tried fixing the flip with a flatiron? When I had longer hair I found doing flatiron waves much, much easier than using a curling iron.

          • Anon

            A friend with curly hair recently clued me in to hairspray my hair after I straighten it, so I’ve started doing that.

            The flip is so bad that even while I’m flat ironing it, I cant get it to stay. I realize the flip will always be an issue (from chin length hair to hip length hair this one section has always given me a hard time!). I’m hoping if the rest of my hair looks fab, the flip will be less on an issue?

          • No Problem

            The flip is probably from 1) tucking your hair behind your ear (the front part) and 2) sleeping on it and it getting pressed into the curve of your neck all night (the rest of your hair).

          • Anon

            If the flip is always there, it’s not because she’s sleeping on it. It’s part of her hair.

          • Anonymous

            I have a weird flip and it is definitely just the way my hair waves. I wasted 20+ minutes per day for years of my life blow-drying it straight, only to have it wrecked the minute I stepped outside into the humidity. I chopped it off into a pixie, which was challenging to get right but now takes 3 minutes to dry and style and is highly weather-resistant.

    • LawDawg

      I had the Revlon styler, but during NAS I upgraded to a Drybar oval brush dryer. The oval brush makes it easier to use and it doesn’t seem to pull/break my hair like the Revlon one did. It is still a bit pricy, but nowhere near the Dyson.

    • Anonymous

      Have you actually tried your Revlon one? I have this one and can still use it on my chin-length hair – https://www.amazon.com/Professional-Charcoal-Infused-One-step-Blowout/dp/B07SH1MKZ6/
      It looks very similar to the Revlon one.

      I agree you should not put a lot of money into this since you are normally low maintenance. That’s me too, and whenever I go out and spend money on hair styling things, they do not get used. I just hate styling my hair and am unlikely to change at this point.

    • anon

      I have a dyson air wrap and my hair is a bit longer than yours. I find it great for when I want a straight-ish blow out but challenging to use when trying to enhance a beach wave look (which is what my natural hair looks like air-dried). I still like it and am growing my hair long again, at which point it will be more useful, but if you plan to keep your hair a short length, I don’t think the investment is worth it.

      If you already have a straightener, look up ways to utilize the flat iron to enhance waves. Youtube should have a lot of video tutorials – that might be a good starting place.

      • Anon

        I actually prefer the straight look! I personally don’t see the point of putting waves into my already wavy hair, especially at this length.

    • Anon

      If the original Revlon One-Step is too large for you, there are a couple smaller versions of the Revlon (or similar) available:
      1) Costco sells a version of the Revlon that is still oval-shaped, but with a smaller overall barrel. (https://www.costco.com/revlon-one-step-hair-dryer-and-volumizer-titanium-max-edition.product.100678329.html)
      2) Drybar sells a “Single Shot” dryer brush, which is smaller than the Double Shot and has a round shape. (see here: https://www.sephora.com/product/drybar-single-shot-2-25-P467618)

    • Ribena

      If your hair is naturally a little wavy, try drying it in a micro fibre hair turban and the scrunching hair mousse through it, curly girl style. I can’t give up ‘real shampoo’ but doing this has made my hair look the best it ever has.

    • Anon

      I’m sure someone you know has the air wrap — can you ask around and borrow one for a weekend and see what you think?

  10. Anon

    I had C19 last fall (November) with what I consider to be a mild case…very few symptoms other than being tired for a few days and the dreaded loss of taste and smell. For the most part, my taste has returned, but smell is still 75% gone. I know there are “tips” all over the web for things you can try to reestablish this, but does anyone have any real life stories to share?

    • Anonymous

      Nothing to share, but thank you for putting it out there that even mild cases of C19 can have a lasting impact. I feel like many discount that – particularly in my red, southern state.

    • Anonymous

      Do you have bad allergies? I lost my sense of taste/smell last summer (not COVID; lots of sinus issues tho). We had very heavy rain locally, so the mold count was sky-high and allergies here are bad anyway (NC). It turns out that I had developed nasal polyps (they returned post-sinus surgery). I didn’t have them in decades of life previously, but it’s a weird thing that is just timing coincidence (but had me thrown for a while though).

      • Pompom

        Just your NC neighbor saying hey and ugh this mold bloom after all the rain is killing me.

    • Formerly Lilly

      No advice, but commiseration. I had Covid in December with a four day total loss of smell and taste. Eight months later I would put both at about 50% over all. Citrus and mint I can taste fully. Other things, such as apples have almost no taste. I’ve found myself eating for texture rather than taste.

    • Anon

      Yes–you should just keep smelling. I lost my sense of taste and smell for six weeks in spring 2020 and it comes and goes now. But I am really aggressively into wine (lots of classes, had a great nose pre-covid) and I find that really sniffing food (over and over), even if it’s weird, has been helpful, and I have seen advice to do this, so that’s what I’m doing. There is tissue damage in your nose and you have to reestablish neural pathways.

    • Keep at it!

      I’m sorry you’re going through this. It’s rare to have anosmia 6 months past your infection (only 5% of cases). Have you tried olfactory training? I’d also see if there is a university or hospital or medical school near you that is looking into this. Here’s a URL that goes into olfactory training: https://www.advisory.com/en/daily-briefing/2021/04/19/smell-training

      Anecdotally, my friend is in your shoes too. His sense of smell is mostly back but it took time and doing things like sniffing coffee.Best of luck.

  11. Anonymous

    I looked at the picture of a bunch of Afghans being evacuated in the belly of a C-130 and there are a lot of women in that picture. I understand that the plane was a just stormed by people desperate to get out and the pilot just said F___ it and took them to safety. Good for him/her. I hope that there are a lot more people like that getting people out of Kabul, especially ones who have been helping the US all along, at their risk and to our benefit. I didn’t go to West Point, but understand that it’s motto is Duty, Honor, Country, presumably in that order for a good reason. I am not a fan of irregular immigration, but understand full well why it happens. If it is OK at our southern border (or not OK; we acquiesce because desperate people will always try to find a way out that that will be the case no matter what the laws say), it ought to be OK for this. I’m not so sure how we morally get to focus on formalities for some people and not for others.

    • Anonymous

      Where did you see that picture? Most of the ones I saw vast-majority men, even on planes that were supposed to be reserved for women and children. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to be a woman abandoned to the Taliban. Obviously the situation is extremely complex (and it’s something my family has experience with, although not in quite as dire a situation), but the images of men fleeing while women and children are left behind will haunt me for a long time. Women have put up with so much abuse at the hands of their husbands under the guise of “but your husband will protect you from other men” and the latter half of that is not actually true.

      • Anonymous

        Where are you looking? Most pictures I have seen of airport scenes (except the ones of people actively running on the tarmac), included women and children.

        The c-17 picture OP references was all over CNN. BBC reporting has also been good.

        Unfortunately, not many people are getting out today as the Taliban are blocking access to the airport. Many planes are leaving way way below capacity even though there are like 50 000 people outside the airport. One German plane only had 7 people on board.

        • Ci

          The women and children you’re are seeing in the cargo plane pic are likely foreign nationals being evacuated, or under other special circumstances. The average Afghan woman will have very little opportunity of leaving.

          • Anonymous

            I’m not referring just to Of course the average Afghan woman has almost no chance of leaving but it is also not accurate to say that the airport pictures show only men and that Afghan men who served with the US and allies are leaving their wives and children behind. Any picture gallery on BBC, NYT etc has pictures with multiple women and children in scenes at the airport including sitting on the tarmac. Only the pictures without any women or children are the ones of men running on the tarmac next to the C17. The one with the little girl being lifted by her arm over the razor wire around the airport by her dad was heartbreaking.

    • Anonymous

      What is so shocking to an American who overpacks for everything is that the people I see at the airport seem to be bringing absolutely nothing with them.

      • Anon

        They were literally running for their lives, with only the clothes on their backs. The ones you saw on the plane were the lucky ones. Everyone else is still stuck in Afghanistan.

      • Anonymous

        Seriously? They just want to get out alive. They are not trying to bring multiple outfits.

        • Anonymous

          It’s not the outfits (for me), but think of all of the paper and other things we regard as fundamental (birth certificates, passports, COVID card and vax records, all that for kids; any medicines; money; cards; masks now). Even if the documents (and schooling ones: proof of graduation, any professional licenses) are scanned, I still need a charging cord and a phone. If I had to run for my life at this moment, I might have more on me for transitioning my life. I see in pictures literally nothing, just souls desperate for hope.

          • Anon

            How do you know that it’s not in their pocket or purse? None of that is bulky.

          • anon

            I’ve heard that some were burning their passports, diplomas, professional licenses, etc in case they are stopped by the Taliban on the way to the airport. Immigration officials are “verifying” identity by asking for phone numbers.

      • LaurenB

        I hope Anonymous at 10:39 am was being sarcastic. These people are fleeing for their lives. Signed, granddaughter of someone who arrived at Ellis Island with nothing but the clothing on his back

    • Anon

      I don’t know how people made these decisions. I personally would want my husband to take my place on the plane since if he’s still alive, we may have a chance of reuniting? I’m assuming that men are more likely to be straight up killed than women and children. I guess I don’t know what the men on the plane will do next (go off and live their best lives? or immediately try to get their loved ones to safety as well?).

      • Anonymous

        I guess if you are alive you have options. If you aren’t alive . . .

        I don’t think that the thinking goes beyond that, unfortunately.

      • Anon

        This. I assume it’s mostly men who actually worked with the American military and are most at risk of being killed and therefore most need to flee. This certainly might not be the only factor, but it is one reason that there are so many men in those pictures.

        • anon

          My friend who was deployed to Afghanistan as an Army Ranger medic told me yesterday that the majority of the Afghanis they worked closely with will be publicly executed. It’s awful.

        • anon

          I think there is also an assumption that a man might have a better chance at getting a job and be able to get the rest of the family then.

    • Anonymous

      Immigration atty here! Due to Title 42, a WWII era public health statute, the southern border is closed to adult asylum seekers, who have to wait in Mexico in makeshift refugee camps as part of “MPP”, the Migrant Protection Protocols. Biden ended MPP as a program, but not Title 42 exclusions, and TX and MO sued. Yesterday, a judge ruled he has to reinstate MPP.

      • Anonymous

        The southern border is pretty porous in good times, regardless of what the laws are or what political administration in place at the moment. I just cannot believe that we can’t figure out how to aid our allies (this has been a known problem as long as we’ve been in Afghanisan, but we cut and run and made the situation infinitely worse –> what excuse did we have? we seem to be married to our ability to blame red tape for everything when we make the d*mn tape!). They risked their lives for us and apparently the administration didn’t really care.

        • Anonymous

          Right? Like presumably we background checked these people when we hired them. Get them out and process them in a third country if needed.

          • Anonymous

            Exactly! They were vetted to work with our military. Get them out and process elsewhere.

        • Awful awful

          100% agree. We screwed over the people who helped us in our cause. Left them to hang out to dry. Their daughters will be “married” off to T-ban fighters, the women will go back into the darkness, and people will live under fear and oppression. I guess if you’re not from that part of the world, you don’t get it. The way we withdrew is awful.

          • Anonymous

            It’s so disturbing to see overwhelming social media posts in my city arguing against helping these refugees who helped our troops!

          • Anonymous

            SO disheartening – these people have risked their lives for the USA more than like 99% of the US population. Good enough to help us and die for us but not good enough to live near us.

    • Anon

      It’s a C-17… a C-130 doesn’t fit nearly this many people. I applaud the crew chief & loadmaster and hope they doesn’t get their asses handed to them for tossing the manual when needed.
      I hope that if I am ever in a position of needing to risk my life to support my family, I would have the courage to do so. I’m pretty much constantly in awe of those who brave the crossing from the US south. Likewise for those who risked life and limb to assist the US and allies.

      • anon

        It reminded me of Hugh Thompson and crew intervening at My Lai. He spoke at my college graduation and said that he was convinced he would be court-martialed but that he couldn’t watch it happen and do nothing. Never expected to be considered a hero.

    • Anonymous

      I’m honestly nervous that we’ll have another Aaliyah plane crash situation with an overloaded plane.

      • Anon

        Packing that plane with passengers will cube out long before it grosses out. About only things that will gross out a C-17 before cubing out are ammo and water. This plane took off with a light fuel load and met a tanker after climb-out. It was well away from MGTW.

      • Anonymous

        ? Really? They can barely get anyone on the planes because the Taliban is blocking access to the airport and roads leading to the airport. The LEAST of anyone’s problems is a potentially overfull plane. Planes are taking off borderline empty.

  12. Anonymous

    Suggestions for a fall/winter uniform? I live in the upper midwest and my office is aggressively casual (joggers and baseball hats ok), but I’d prefer something along the lines of smart-casual. Currently just throwing on whatever is marginally clean and fits (1 year PP) which is usually some kind of nice-ish t-shirt and jeans.

    • Panda Bear

      I love, love, love my eileen fisher stretchy crepe pants. I wear them pretty much year-round, so not a fall/winter specific recommendation, but they are such a comfortable and more polished option than jeans.

      • Anonnymouse

        A very budget-friendly version of these pants that I wear are Old Navy’s pull-on pants. They have pockets and a faux “fly” so look like real pants when untucked.

        • Anonnymouse

          Ok – just checked and they don’t sell these on their site anymore. Boo. But I have found them secondhand on eBay and Poshmark pretty easily.

          • Anon

            Try looking again later in the year. I also love these pants and they’re not always available but I’ve bought them probably 4ish years in a row now.

            I will warn you, then do pill a lot.

          • Anon

            I bought those pants and they don’t hold a candle to the EF crepe pants, I’m sorry.

    • anonymous

      I don’t follow trends or anything, but these are my uniforms for fall/winter:
      – Dark wash skinny jeans with a patterned top (sleeveless or short sleeve) with a cardigan or knit jacket and flats
      – Same as above except switch the jeans for black ponte knit pants in a skinny or straight leg style
      – As the weather gets colder, I’ll keep the same outfit but switch out the flats for sneakers, slip on high top sneakers or booties.
      – In the winter, I’ll wear heavier knit sweaters with a long sleeve shirt underneath if it’s very cold.

    • No Face

      My cold weather uniform is stretchy pants/leggings and a long or oversized pullover sweater. Most of my sweaters are used or Karen Kane.

    • Anonymous

      If I were going to the office this fall, I’d wear straight-leg or wide-leg jeans, a plain t-shirt, a blazer, utility, or moto jacket, and fashion sneakers, lug-sole loafers, or booties. For winter, I’d wear the same jeans, a waist-length sweater or a giant chunky sweater, and boots.

    • PrettyLawBelle

      I’ve been thinking about this. I saw a blogger wearing skinny Ponte pants, a thin tunic length sweater, and a beautiful scarf, and thought to myself that will be my cold-weather uniform this year.

    • anon

      Cute jeans you really like, simple sweater, earrings, ballet flats or fashionable sneakers. This is comfortable, stylish, but you won’t seem grossly out of place among the sweatpants people.

  13. Paging Chromebook for Mom

    Take a look at Costco online, which has several great options and fast 2 day shipping. Got a Chromebook for my mom, late 60s, at the beginning of last year. She loves it, easy to use and has held up well. They have Lenovo, but we got the HP bundle for about $320.

  14. Anon

    Any advice on high cholesterol?

    I’m slim (size 2), eat barely any meat (2-3 times a month), some fish/seafood (1-2 times a week), and eggs (~3-6 a week). I don’t eat dairy because I’m lactose intolerant. I’m probably eating more carbs and sugar than I should.

    My cholesterol was 198 two years ago, 207 last year, and 218 this year. Doctor says it’s genetic and to “work on my diet,” but I didn’t get any clearer answer than that. My only idea is to severely cut the carbs and sugar? Should I also go vegan? Two of my grandparents had heart attacks in their late 40s/early 50s so I can’t help but be concerned.

    • Anon

      On the diet side, you basically want to eat a lot of fiber. Vegetables, whole fruit (no juice), legumes, whole grains. Exercise also helps lower cholesterol.

    • Anonymous

      My husband has found that he can control cholesterol with exercise, but that he has to be absolutely consistent with it. If he slacks for a month, it is back up above 250.

      • Anonymous

        This. You can’t out-diet your genes b/c your genes are set up to make cholesterol. My waifish aunt has sky-high cholesterol, now made normalish by statins; her husband, in the same house and eating the same food, has low cholesterol. My mom has different genes and eats butter and bacon; her cholesterol is average. My husband has no male relatives b/c they all died very early of heart attacks; he got tested early and has been on statins for 20ish years.

      • Seventh Sister

        My mom has the same deal – absent statins, she has very high cholesterol even though she is a pretty healthy eater. My sedentary, overweight dad who watches 23.5 hours of Fox News a day has low cholesterol (and blood pressure!) despite his lack of activity.

        My husband has SUPER high cholesterol, and the number hasn’t budged (absent statins) since his teens. His dad is the same way.

    • Anonymous

      Given your family history of premature heart disease, I’d get a second opinion and if your doctor is a general internist, I’d try a cardiologist. I’m all for diet and exercise changes, but sometimes you can’t overcome genetics without medications.

      • anon

        +1 to seeing a cardiologist. Medication may be necessary or just a good way to lower your cholesterol without making your life more difficult than it has to be. Your diet seems generally good for most people, so if you really want to change your cholesterol through dietary changes, I would work with a nutritionist who can help you come up with an eating plan specifically addressing your medical issues. If a cardiologist refers you to a nutritionist, some sessions may be covered by insurance.

      • Anonnymouse

        Yes – the more I read the more I feel like high cholesterol has more of a genetic component than we give credit for. A personal example: A friend of mine is naturally slim and I’m the opposite (diets are fairly similar) and she has high cholesterol, and my numbers have always been great for whatever reason. Would definitely get additional, specific advice about diet, etc. A doctor should be able to give you specific advice and follow-up and not just leave you to figure it out on your own.

      • pugsnbourbon

        +1. He should at least start discussing meds with you especially with your grandparents’s heart attacks.

    • Anonymous

      Honestly, you’re probably a good candidate for medication in that case. It’s not diet, it’s genetics and your body chemistry.

    • Anon

      Exercise, fiber, and healthy fats. You also might just be at high genetic risk and need statins, no matter what you do, but work on those things first.

    • Anon

      I’d see a cardiologist. My dad has genetically high cholesterol (great health profile, great lifestyle habits similar to yours, but he got tested in his 40s and his total cholesterol was over 400). He’s been on a statin for over 20 years, and he sees a cardiologist who works with him on dialing in the medication, getting appropriate testing done, etc. My dad turned 70 this year and is in pretty great shape, golfs 36 holes a week, etc. It’s manageable with the right treatment.

    • Anon

      Oh I feel you. Crazy bad hearts and cholesterol on both sides of my family. I’m still in my 20s, eat well, exercise (former college athlete, and I run half marathons and race triathalons) and am generally very health conscious and my cholesterol is 230. My doctor told me to watch what I eat and exercise, but I don’t have a ton of room to improve.

      My relative was similar – former college rower in ridiculously good shape and ate well, went vegan in his late 20s. His numbers were bad (I don’t know them) and his doctor gave him the choice of medication or going vegan. He’s been able to maintain his numbers for about 15 years.

    • Cornellian

      I’m in the same boat. BMI is 18-19 and I don’t eat much meat, but cholesterol is ~200. I have bad genetics for it, my active, non-smoking, tea-totalling, 100 lb aunts all have the same problem. My NP recommended krill oil (research carefully for which brand, I can check and repost later), which I’ve been taking for a couple months, and has a lot of other health benefits. I think cutting alcohol down and getting exercise are the other main toggles. I’m trying to avoid having to go on any medication for as long as possible.

    • Anonymous

      More animal products, less sugar and carbs. The old “eggs raise cholesterol” myth has been debunked so many times over. Inflammation from carbs and processed sugars (all sugars, really) is thought to be the bigger culprit these days.

    • Anonymous

      I was a vegetarian with sky high cholesterol. I thought I was healthy too, I wasn’t, I was lying to myself. I’ve been vegan for a few years now and my cholesterol is basically ‘perfect’ now, doctors always comment on how impressed they are with my numbers.

    • anonymous

      For added fiber, try Metamucil or Yerba Prima psyllium husk either on the powder or capsules.

      • Anonymous

        I recently posted a question about fiber and this reminded me to follow up and buy the husk, but the brand at Target only gives you 1.8 grams per capsule – that seems so low. Is that what others are using? I thought it would be more like 10-15 grams.

    • Anonymous

      Hormonal birth control sometimes raises cholesterol. I think it is pretty rare, but happened very dramatically to a friend.

      • Anon

        It raises cholesterol and blood pressure and blood glucose for me. In general, they say its safety profile was approved “as compared to pregnancy.”

    • A Nonny Mouse

      I had a lot of luck with making sure I got lots of soluble fiber – supplements or oatmeal/beans daily.

    • Trixie

      Work on ways to raise your HDL–the healthy cholesterol. Flaxseeds, fish, etc. The ration of HDL to LDL is important, and my doctor says high HDL is a good foil to LDL.

    • Anon

      I would cut the carbs and sugar and get tested again just to see what happens.

      Personally I’d rather have high cholesterol than take statins on a preventive basis. But I’d also try a lot of different things to lower cholesterol.

    • OP

      Thank you for all the suggestions! I’m going to get more serious about the exercise, fiber, and lowering the carbs and sugar. I already drink very rarely, so there’s not a ton of room for improvement there, unfortunately.

    • Anon

      At 21 my cholesterol was 280. Went vegan, met with a nutritionist and followed the plan religiously, took SO MUCH FIBER, exercised. It went down . . . to 240. Sometimes it is just genetics. And I eventually decided that I wanted to eat meat and bread and cake (sometimes), although I kept up the exercise. And it went down to 180 for reasons nobody can figure out.

      You need to talk to a cardiologist about your family history and your triglycerides, and then decide together whether you need statins. (In the end the decision for me was not until menopause because I have no family history of heart disease). But given your family history, you should definitely be talking to a specialist.

    • Anonymous

      Your total blood cholesterol number isn’t that interesting in itself. You need to know the ratio between the different ones.

      You want the good cholesterol (HDL) to be high and triglycerides and the bad (LDL) to be low, especially small LDL particles. You might want an ApoB-test, for apolipoprotein B, to test if you have too many small LDL particles.

      What you absolutely don’t want, is to get metabolic syndrome symptoms with high triglyceride levels, and low HDL cholesterol combined with insulin resistance.

      The most important single thing you can do might be cutting the sugar, both regular sugar, fruit sugars and weird sugars. Next on the list other simple carbohydrates.

      And possibly eat a little more healthy fats – you do want your HDL to be high!

  15. Anonymous

    I’m so angry that the US is advising booster shots for “all Americans” except those that received the J&J shot – not because it’s not needed but because they haven’t bothered to gather enough data because most of the country got Pfizer or Moderna so who cares about J&J. I followed the CDC’s directions and got the first shot I could get, which was J&J. Now you’re telling me not only is it less effective than the other shots, it carries a higher risk of harm to me as a young woman than other shots, and now I can’t get a booster even though you think it’s needed?? I’m sorry I ever got the shot. I wish I’d waited. I really do feel like I was an unwitting participant in an experiment. I don’t want to get a J&J booster because of the increased risk to women, if I get a booster I want it to be an mRNA shot. It doesn’t sound like the US is even considering that even though other countries have approved a mix of Astra Zeneca and an mRNA. I’m so angry and frustrated by this whole thing.

      • Anon

        Everyone I know who got J&J just went and got a series of Pfizer or Moderna, you can too.

        • Anon for this

          Yep, I got J&J in March and then got one shot of Moderna in June (by that time my area had plenty of vaccines for whoever wanted them, and I took Moderna to save the Pfizer for kids). I think there’s some data that even one shot of an mRNA on top of a DNA-based vaccine (which is what J&J and AstraZeneca are, although I believe the actual study just used AZ) gives very good protection.

          I get the frustration, though. It would be nice to have more guidance for people who took J&J, although I think part of the concern is that J&J is still a very good vaccine and might be especially good for transient populations, so they don’t want people to avoid it and get no vaccine at all.

        • Anonymous

          It depends on where she got J&J. If she got it at a public vaccination site and insurance wasn’t billed for the administration fee, then she can probably get Pfizer or Moderna at the pharmacy. If insurance was already billed, she won’t be able to get a second series.

          It is absolutely frustrating. So many things about the J&J rollout were mishandled. First of all, why did J&J test a single-shot regimen instead of a two-dose regimen? Nearly all vaccines require more than one dose for the primary series, so it doesn’t make scientific sense that they’d focus on a one-dose regimen. It had to be for business reasons–to get it to market more quickly, or to appeal to a population that would be hard to reach with a two-dose regimen. Public vaccination sites should have offered people a choice between J&J and one of the mRNA vaccines, and should not have concealed information about future availability the way ours did (we were offered J&J with the implication that it would be several months before we could get an mRNA vaccine, and then the very next week they were offering even ineligible people mRNA vaccines). And J&J should have been targeted at populations that would be hard to reach with an mRNA vaccine or would not be likely to show up for a second shot, not highly motivated people who were actively seeking out vaccines and would of course show up for the second shot.

          • LaurenB

            And when municipalities tried to target J&J one-shot towards those populations that would not be likely to show up for a second shot (difficult / economically not feasible to take off work, not trusting of medicine, etc), others screamed that it was racist to do so. Can’t win for losing, no good deed goes unpunished, etc.

          • Anon

            There are so many free vaccine clinics where I live. You just drive up and get a free shot. There’s nothing stopping OP.

          • Anonymous

            All of the free vaccine clinics where we live have been shut down, and before they were shut down they looked at the registry to see whether you’d already been vaccinated. It’s not as easy as it sounds to get revaccinated.

    • AugNon

      In the same boat and frustrated. FWIW and to support what a prior poster said, there is recent data that suggests J&J holds up well against Delta. Friendly Neighbor Epidemiologist/Emily Smith on Substack (who is also team JJJ) had a good writeup yesterday about this.

    • Anonymous

      I’m sorry. I totally hear you and understand. I felt that pressure as well and was fortunately able to get Pfizer, which I needed (per the recommendation of my physician) since our limited data suggest that the mRNA vaccines might be more effective for my health condition. I didn’t know what I was getting until the moment the needle went into my arm and it was so stressful and frustrating trying to navigate it.

      Are you sure you can’t get mRNA now, though? The health department in San Francisco was giving J&J recipients Pfizer shots, although I think it may have been for at-risk populations only.

    • Anon

      This thing with the J&J is a sh*t sandwich, to be sure. I’m not sure how things went so awry with the shot and also with the research collection about side effects and about boosters. I would not want (or get) another J&J shot, I’d hold out to get another type. In our state, when you go to make a vaccine appointment through the DOH, the type of shot is listed with the appointment time. A friend of mine kept getting appointment suggestions for the J&J and kept skipping over them until he finally got one for the Pfizer. I hope they let people switch shot types for the boosters and don’t mandate you have to get the same one you got previously.

    • Anonymous

      I kind of want to get all of the shots, so I got Moderna but would totally get a J&J as a booster (preferred, actually, one and done) and then Pfizer if eventually needed.

      BUT OMG folks, just get something if you haven’t yet gotten anything. That is the big problem.

    • KS IT Chick

      Right now, they are analyzing data from Israel, which didn’t have the Jansen/Johnson & Johnson vaccine. They had an exclusive contract with Pfizer, and they went hard on getting their entire eligible population vaccinated. Once there is similar data for J&J or Astra Zeneca, we should know if a booster will be needed.

      Science doesn’t usually happen in the public space. It’s messy and complicated, and new evidence constantly changes conclusions. The entire pandemic has been an education on how little we all know about how scientists work, especially in the healthcare sphere.

    • No Problem

      It’s extremely disingenuous to say “they haven’t bothered to gather enough data.” Of course they are trying to gather the data. It takes more time to gather data with enough power to tell you something useful on a shot that a smaller percentage of people got. Please don’t insinuate that the CDC and vaccine companies are not doing everything they can to beat this thing.

      • Anon

        CDC isn’t tracking breakthrough cases or breakthrough cases leading to Long COVID. Sure it’s because they lack resources. But why do they lack resources during a global crisis?!

        Also, vaccine companies could have begun enrolling immune compromised patients in trials before April 2021.

        • Anonymous

          Yup. The CDC is not tracking all breakthrough cases and is not doing enough to track long COVID.

          • Anonymous

            +1. We’ve said all along that was a bad idea (and by we, I include the general public and noted epidemiologists, not just this site).

    • Anonymous

      J&J data is coming in and they expect to have it soon, probably before the booster shots actually start. It was authorized after the other 2 were approved, so data is taking longer.

    • LaurenB

      You’re taking this far too personally. It’s not that they haven’t “bothered” to get enough data about the J&J vaccine – it’s that the J&J vaccine was not approved for emergency use until March 2021 as opposed to Pfizer and Moderna which were both approved for emergency use in December 2020. The advice to “get the first shot you can” was still the right advice.

      • Anonymous

        It would have been the right advice if public health officials in our county hadn’t lied about vaccine availability to trick people into getting J&J when the mRNA vaccines were also readily available.

        • Anon

          Yeah, those darn scientists definitely had it out for you, specifically. They sure fooled you!

          • Anonymous

            It was the public health officials who assigned the vaccine appointments, not the scientists.

      • Anonymous

        I really don’t think it was. It was a decision made during a time when we had limited data and I understand why that advice was given, but it was never appropriate for many patients and it hasn’t aged well. I would have preferred a realistic, nuanced approach, which you could distill into simple public messaging: “The shots are different, but they each have good benefits. Get J&J if you don’t like needles, need protection quickly (just two weeks and then you’re good to go!), or want to be one-and-done. Get Pfizer or Moderna if you’re higher-risk and need maximum efficacy, even if it takes a bit longer. Whatever you choose, all shots offer excellent protection against serious illness and death.”

        • Anonymous

          Exactly. The CDC and the rest of the federal government should have learned their lesson with the mask messaging. Unfortunately, they bungled the vaccine messaging in pretty much the same way.

          • Anonymous

            People who got screwed over with the J&J shot are not “snowflakes.” They are justifiably angry that they were sold a bill of goods.

    • Seventh Sister

      I feel like the whole recommendation and approval process in the US has been so haphazard. While I pretty much line up for every vaccine I’m offered (and will be due pretty early for a booster given the recommendations), I don’t understand why the approval for kids 2-11 is taking so long. Having one eligible kid and one who isn’t vaccinated, it’s hard for me to feel grateful or happy that adults are getting boosters. I’d take the risk, I’d sign whatever you want me to sign waiving damages.

      • Anonymous

        It’s because the FDA is set up to consider only the risks of adverse events from the vaccine, not to weigh those risks against the risk of delaying approval.

        • Seventh Sister

          Well, that’s stupid. Why can’t they change and adapt, the way every other institution and person has been asked to do for the past 18 months? In the decade + that I’ve had kids, I’ve felt like the feelings of anti-vaxxers have been prioritized over the health and safety of the collective public. Adverse reactions are exceedingly rare, they need to get this show on the road.

          • Anonymous

            This is a problem with the FDA review process that has always existed, even before antivaxxers got noisy. In general, the FDA does not give enough consideration to the magnitude of the benefit provided by the drug. See, e.g., the expensive dementia drug that was just approved that provides only small benefits in exchange for a pretty hefty risk of side effects that the FDA deemed acceptable.

    • Cornellian

      I’m not affiliated, but taking part in a vaccine booster study for Sanofi, and you are eligible if you got J&J. Not sure if they’re recruiting in your area, but it’s run by Acurian, and there is no placebo group, everyone is getting some version of their vaccine. Just something to check in to, maybe.

      • Cornellian

        and it’s an mRNA that finished its phase 2 study as a two-dose competitor to Pfizer/Moderna, so this study is just for booster efficacy.

    • Anon

      It’s not the same, but in Europe people who got a first shot of Astra Zeneca were advised to get a second of Moderna/Pfizer, especially recommended for young women. So while this population of vector vaccine + mRNA is not well studied, it does in practice exist.

    • Coach Laura

      RE: J&J – I have many immunocompromised acquaintances (via FaceBook) who have had different vaccines after their first in order to try to develop antibodies (this was before boosters for immunocompromised were approved last week). Either they started with J&J or mRNA and then got the other as a follow-up. One friend got 2 Pfizer, 1 J&J and then finally a Moderna before developing antibodies. Articles point out that vaccine records are kept by states, not the CDC so people have gotten around it by going to another state. Apparently over 1 million people have gotten unapproved boosters nationwide. Going to a free clinic (not a pharmacy) is better because pharmacies try to bill insurance and you don’t want to commit insurance/other fraud by claiming not to have insurance when you in fact do.

      I think that if there was any adverse health impact of taking an mRNA vaccine after J&J we would have heard about it by now. AZ is used in Europe and Canada and is similar to the J&J and those countries are advising mRNA boosters as opposed to giving the second AZ (this is because AZ has some side effects in younger people, so it was discontinued in that group).

      Of course, not a doctor/expert so my $0.02 worth of advice.

    • Anonie

      agree just go. my husband and i both got jnj in early april. late June when the delta news started coming out, we both got a dose of pfizer. don’t intend to get a third right now. several articles in NYT and other reputable sources about people doing this and other countries mixing vaccines. we have a small child and didn’t want to take the 40% chance of bringing something home to child. white lie if need be.

  16. Anonymous

    Reposting because yesterday’s post was late in the day – what do folks think about car shopping right now? I’ve always bought 1 or 2 year old lease backs, never new. However, the current used car shortage has used cars only $5-6K less than new. Is insurance significantly more for new? Excise tax? What are other advantages/disadvantages?

    I’m looking at a Hyundai Tucson Hybrid or Honda CR-V Hybrid.

    • Anon

      I like to buy new cars and drive them until the wheels fall off. Advantages of a new car in my mind are that you have all the newest safety features and the warranty that comes with the car. I’m sure my insurance was a bit more for a new car, but not so much that I really noticed. If you are financing, the interest rate for new cars is often lower. For such a small difference in cost, I would get the new car without question.

        • anon

          Neither does mine, but it would go up if I went out and bought a new car. Plus, once your car is 10+ years old, you might be comfortable dropping collision coverage, depending on Bluebook value, etc.

          • Anonymous

            The point is that there isn’t much difference between a brand-new car and one that’s a year or two old.

    • Anon

      Just bought a Honda Accord Hybrid. I didn’t have a car before so cannot compare the insurance but I love the car. I did have to pay sticker price and go to a dealership further out because one near me did not have the one I wanted and could not get it. I also had hoped to buy a 2-4 year old car but the price difference was so small that it didn’t make any sense.

    • Anon

      We got the crv hybrid. It is great! Inventory was sooo limited and we got the only hybrid for miles and paid MSRP. Now the dealership has ten.

  17. Denver Q

    Hi – Recently relocated to Denver and am in somewhat urgent need of a reliable and trustworthy place to board my 2 small dogs. Anyone have recommendations? Looking around Wash Park + Airport. TIA

    • ArenKay

      Shylo Country Club for dogs. Out by DIA, have been in boarding business for 20+ years, and are great.

  18. Hollis

    Has anyone here tried one of those hair regrowth devices that look like a bike helmet? If so, do you think it works or is it just a gimmick? I’m on rogaine and seeing some results, mostly in the no additional loss side of things, but am intrigued by ads for the helmet-like devices.

    • Anon

      So, I follow a few dermatologists on social media who talk about things like this. My understanding based off of this is that these devices are very effective if you buy the right one, but there are gimicky versions out there that aren’t effective (like a baseball cap version that’s sold at Costco).

    • iRestore

      I’m in my late 30s and started losing hair in my early 30s, but couldn’t do anything about it for a few years, until I was done having kids. I’ve been using rogaine for ~18 mo. w/o much regrowth, although I think the shedding has mostly stopped. I’ve also been taking 150mg of spironolactone (up from 100mg, which I started taking last summer), which didn’t seem to have much effect, or side effects. I started using the iRestore helmet last month; my therapist (of all people) told me it was the best one. It’s too early to assess results, but I’m feeling pretty desperate. You’re supposed to use it every other day; I do MWF because “every other day” is too hard for me to track. The helmet is a bit of a hassle, and I wish I could reduce pressure somewhat, but isn’t irritating my skin or having other negative effects for me. I’ll try to check back in in a few months to see if I can better answer your second question.

  19. Elle

    Does anyone have recommendations for masks to be worn while working out? Specifically HIIT workouts if that matters

    • No Face

      I like the black disposable ones from Costco. Cloth is too heavy for me personally, but others may have reusable masks recommendations.

    • Anonymous

      My daughter likes the Athleta Activate mask for gymnastics.

      But I am doing HIIT at home for now. The risk-benefit calculation for a teenager doing a highly specialized sport in a gigantic gym with high ceilings is a lot different from the calculation for an adult doing a workout in a small, poorly ventilated studio that could easily be done at home.

    • Cornellian

      I like more structured ones for anything involving effort/hot weather so it’s not touching my face. I specifically like the flax protection KF94 ones, and have also had luck with the amazon kids KN95 ones (I just adjust the ear straps all the way out… i find the cone fits my face better than the “adult” ones).

    • Anon

      The UnderArmor ones are awesome and worth $20. Wore mine all winter for skiing.

  20. Webcam recs?

    Need an add-on camera for our new desktop computer situation. I’m overwhelmed by the options! I have an important virtual interview coming up, so would like to find something good quality that can ship relatively quickly. Any recs?

    • Greensleeves

      I have a Logitech webcam that I ordered from Amazon and I’ve been very happy with it. Mine is a C925-e.

  21. Anon

    A promotional opportunity arose in my team recently – for the first time in years (and another probably won’t be coming for some time). I was considered within my team / by my manager (and amongst other teams that work with us) to be the front runner for the promotion. But, I’ve been in medical treatment since January with no end in sight, and can’t physically or mentally handle increased responsibilities right now, so did not apply. I felt happy about that choice, until the successful candidate (a teammate) was announced today. I was surprised this particular person was chosen, as they do not have a lot of experience or some of the desired competencies for the role. I think external interest was low. I felt a pang of “that should’ve been me” at the announcement and I’m beating myself up about not being more ambitious and not just going for it. The truth is, I *truly* don’t want more responsibility right now or feel that the rat race is more important than my other current life priorities (health). I just feel there is a general sense that success means moving up, up, up, and I’ve reached a point where I’m not sure that’s for me (right now, maybe for the foreseeable future?), and it’s surprisingly hard to make peace with that.

    Anyone else decide at a particular point that career advancement was at odds with other priorities and make the choice not to take on more? I’d love to hear from you, and about any feelings you navigated in making that choice. Thanks!

    • anon

      I’m sorry, this can be really tough. I did turn down a big opportunity when my former boss retired. I had two tiny kids and just didn’t have enough headspace or energy to take on a bigger job. It was kind of sh!tshow, TBH, and I felt a lot of guilt about letting people down. I also had a lot of thoughts about whether I was letting motherhood stifle my previous ambitions. (The answer: Yeah, I did, but who cares.) That job eventually opened up again. I wasn’t as overloaded in my personal life as I was the first time around, so I threw my hat in the ring and I got it.

    • No thanks

      I went through this situation three years ago and was talking to a colleague about it recently because he likewise decided not to apply for a promotion that he was almost certain to have received. We discussed how torn we were about deciding not to apply because we were previously (and admittedly) Type A individuals who had clear goals for our career after law school (we worked and were miserable for years at the same large law firm before moving to mid-size companies). When the opportunity presented itself to me, I realized that I was not interested in my manager’s job because I prefer to do what is often the behind-the-scenes work and not have to deal with all of the politics and media. Several of my law school classmates have gone on to noteworthy and impressive careers, so I would be lying if I said I do not feel like I have fallen behind them in terms of my career (or that I do not feel some consternation when I run into them or former colleagues at conferences and they ask me what I do). But ultimately, I was certain that my manager’s job–even with its prestige and 50% pay increase–would have made me miserable and I decided that I valued the work-life balance I worked so desperately to achieve when I left the law firm. In the end, I was fortunate because I like the person my company hired and we get along well. I am growing bored with my current position (there is nothing wrong with the job–just bored after working in the same role for nearly 11 years) and am at a loss for what to do next in my career but that is a post for another day. What I do know is that I am not interested in pursuing the next logical job in my current career ladder, which I would not have guessed 11 years ago.

    • Carrots

      I’m going through this kind of thought process exactly (didn’t apply for my supervisor’s role when it opened and haven’t been super thrilled with their replacement) and have been chatting with a friend, who is also feeling it. I think for me, it’s been helpful to figure out where else, besides my job, that I could find joy and be rejuvenated in. I looked for some other volunteer opportunities with organizations that I really love and have found that I’m excited about those. I’ve also been exploring a bit why I didn’t specifically want to apply for that role (was it organizational or was it me not wanting to take the next step) and what, if anything, has changed about situations (or me) if that opportunity were to come up again.

    • Anon

      i think a lot of people end up in situations where advancement is at odd with priorities and make the choice not to take on more. what sounds a bit more complex in your situation is that presumably whatever health situation you are dealing with is not at all your fault and just bad luck, so the ‘other priorities’ are not really something you are choosing vs. a situation where the ‘other priorities’ are more of a choice. you might still make the same decision re not climbing up the ladder, but it might feel differently to you. i think this board includes a lot of Type A overachiever types who always thought they would/were told they should have a ‘big’ career and it can be hard to come to terms with realizing that is not for you and just bc it is not for you, doesn’t mean you’ve failed to achieve

  22. Key-dettes

    I went to W&L a while ago, while the Virginia vs US suit to open VMI to women was going on. I am finally going back to Lexington soon (pending COVID drama). Has anyone on this board attended VMI (which is very reasonable for in-state students and is a small-town small college, if that is your thing)? Or does anyone have annecdata? I am probably going to try to tour VMI just so see it now with women there or at least walk around a bit (the campuses are contiguous).

    [I have a lot of female friends from college who are retiring from the military now, but they are either medical corps or JAGC or did ROTC at larger schools that had long since gone co-ed. I missed W&L going co-ed, but understand that adding women made it much more competitive, which means that some guys didn’t get in but overall is thought to have greatly strengthened the school. Demographically, I am from a working-class NYC suburb, so was a bit fish-out-of-water there but as a first-generation student that would likely have the case anywhere.]

          • Anonymous

            I think that many people are glad to, but we are drowning in pay-for services now and I’d love to read about this, but don’t live where a DC paper is relevant to add and I can’t fund everyone.

        • emeralds

          Bro it’s the Washington Post. If you’re out of free articles and don’t pay for journalism, that’s not my problem.

          • Anonymous

            I thought the WP stopped with any free articles? I remember it used to be 10. Now, I’m down to one national newspaper and one local one, neither being the WP. Don’t even get me started on the TV — I am starting to miss basic cable with so many things to add to my RoKu.

    • Anon

      Anecdata but a friend of mine from high school went there. She did not come out of it the same person, rather appeared to me much diminished. Based on all the reports of racism, sexism, and sexual violence at VMI that doesn’t shock me.

      • Anonymous

        TBH, I’m not sure how that is wildly different than W&L or UVA or any other school. Sadly. Find me a school that is actually good for women.

        • Anon

          My undergraduate alma mater. Even back in the ’90s, the engineering school was very welcoming to women and had double the national average of women engineering students.

          It is hard to quantify what made it good for women. You can look at women professors, a woman associate dean, women enrolled, etc., but the real story was a culture on campus that was just… the opposite of “bro”? People were collaborative. The admissions office wanted to enroll kind students. There isn’t much of a heavy drinking culture. Professors encouraged students to help each other learn.

      • anon

        No one comes out of a military school “the same person.” That’s kind of the point.
        I graduated W&L in the early 2010s but had no interaction with anyone at VMI during my time there

        • Anon

          Yes, and I added that she came out of it ‘much diminished’ not, ‘newly endowed with confidence and grit’.

    • Anon

      There are a lot of Generals on this board but, to my knowledge, very few or no VMI grads. While it could be that a fashion blog does not appeal to VMI alumnae, I think that gives you some information.

  23. anon a mouse

    Has anyone successfully negotiated lower car insurance without changing coverage? I just got our renewal notice and it’s inexplicably going up $200 for 2 cars despite the fact that we barely drive (less than 7K miles/year in normal times, we put less than 2000 miles on our 2 cars last year), have had no tickets or accidents in 5 years, and the cars are now a year older. (One is a 2019 and one is a 2007.) I’d rather not shop for new coverage since we have homeowners and umbrella all together, but this is more than a 15% increase for no clear reason.

    Obviously I will call and ask but would be interested in anecdata before I do so.

    • Anonymous

      Yep, negotiated our rate to be lower when we dropped a commute during the pandemic. It was very easy, but if they hadn’t done it, we would have just changed insurance companies. There’s no real reason to not shop for a new car insurance company just because you have homeowners insurance already.

    • Car stuff

      I tried with State Farm insurance, but they couldn’t care less and just said flat “no”.

      I have been meaning to switch to Geico literally for years…..

      • no

        I tried the same thing with Geico just last week. They could not have cared less about the other quotes I tried to negotiate with.

    • Anon

      It’s really not a big deal to change coverage. At all. So go get other quotes (esurance will quote multiple carriers, for instance) for as close to apples-to-apples coverage limits, and ask for a match. And also try to see if you belong to any organizations (trade groups, alumni associations, AAA, etc.) that your carrier or other carriers would provide discounts for. Then pick what is cheapest at the coverage levels you want.

    • Annony

      If your mileage is that low (and your state allows it), you might want to consider pay-by-mile insurance. I have Metromile and it’s been great. Caveat, I have not had to file a claim so I can’t speak to how well they handle that process.

    • No Problem

      Go on your current insurance website and get a quote for the same coverage as you currently have. If it is lower, call them and ask to switch to the policy you just re-quoted. I did this with Progressive a few years ago when the premium for my new car had not dropped a dime after it was 2 years old. It went from like 500/6 months to 350/6 months. For some reason they couldn’t match the new quote price on my existing policy but could easily switch me to the new one.

      Or just shop around. It really doesn’t take long online.

  24. Anon

    How long would you consider a new employee (associate attorney at midsize law firm) to be still in the adjustment phase? I’ve been at a firm for about 4 months and it isn’t going well. I don’t have enough work, I make errors, and keep having matters pulled away from me. I feel like I’m about to get fired, but I’m just still learning how this new firm operates. I hope I still have runway left to improve things but I’m losing hope….

      • Anon

        A 4th year but I’m feeling more Jr than that because the firm I was at before really didn’t mentor or train well

    • Anonymous

      Can you get ahead of this by talking to the attorneys who yanked away work?

    • AugNon

      I would expect 3-6 months to learn systems/expectations – 6-12 months to be seamlessly transitioned in – but would hope mistakes are things like “failing to CC relationship partner” versus “typos/oversights”

    • Anon Sr. Associate

      If you are having matters pulled, you have a problem. At my firm not having work and having matters pulled is the first step before they fire you for low hours. Is there a senior associate you can talk to about how this firm operates and what you might be able to do?

      What kind of errors? Is this a “I do not know firm procedure” issue or a “I do not really have the experience/knowledge to handle the assignments I am being given” situation?

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