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For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.
I check Ann Taylor really often for potential suits to feature here, so either I was blind before or this one is new — these dark gray suiting separates in their bi-stretch fabric are lovely! If you're not familiar with it, the bi-stretch fabric is machine washable, 4-way stretch, and a poly/rayon/spandex blend.
I love that there are so many different separates to match, here — I've pictured a cutaway blazer and pencil skirt, but there's also a scoop neck sheath dress, ankle trousers, and a second, collared, blazer. Pieces are $89–$179, many of them online exclusives.
I suspect this is different for every firm and school, but for those of you involved with typical on-campus interviewing, how will that look this fall, if it's happening at all?
UPDATE: Just an FYI: One of the classes we mentioned in our roundup of online classes to take for fun during quarantine is starting up again TOMORROW, August 12: the Yale-presented “Science of Well-Being” class. (And it's free!)
This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
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- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Anon
Even though I didn’t love this morning’s shirtdress/housecoat/muumuu, it seemed more appropriate for today’s work environment than a suit.
Is anyone really still wearing suits?
Senior Attorney
I think Kamala Harris is the only one at this point!
Anon
I just saw a photo of her in a charcoal suit, and it seemed so…foreign. (And like she was a cast member of Law & Order.)
Anonymous
I am looking forward to wearing suits again. It is almost like prom, dreaming of outfits, hair not in scrunchie, etc.
anon
Not me, and probably not for a very long time. Which is a shame because I really like this one a lot.
anon
Even if I have interviews this fall (which I’m not planning, but 2020 laughs at all plans so who knows), I would not be doing them in person or wear a suit for them…
Anonymous
I wore one to court yesterday! Honestly, my wardrobe now is half atheleisure, and half suits. There is no in between.
Anonymous
We have the same closet. It’s either shirts-with-words or tropical-weight wool.
No Face
I wore suits to job interviews recently. I have a videoconference court appearance tomorrow and I will wear a dress + blazer suit in the off chance I need to stand up. There are some courts in the rural areas of my state that are still doing in-person proceedings, so I may need to wear a suit for hearings there.
Senior Attorney
Los Angeles Superior Court has gone casual (jeans specifically permitted, even) for the duration, fore those matters that can’t be done remotely. I never thought I’d live to see the day!
Anon
Wow! On the plus side, the clothes are washable then. I don’t like the idea of wearing dry clean only anywhere since I can’t wash it after.
Never too many shoes...
Really? For me, that is terrible. I could never respect counsel that showed up in jeans, even if it is allowed. I still find it weird to appear remotely before a judge ungowned though, so maybe do not ask me.
Anonymous
Gowns? How civilized. Clearly you have never been in a criminal court in NYC. Even before the pandemic, I saw yoga pants, ratty sweaters, flip-flops, sequined tote bags, all kinds of stuff.
Senior Attorney
I agree. I am still dressing up for court and so is my husband. I note, though, that the criminal lawyers, who are in court every day, are dressing down.
In California judges are required to wear gowns by law even if remote so mercifully that’s not an issue.
Anonymous
I think Never too many shoes is Canadian and she is talking about herself wearing the gown, not the judge?
Senior Attorney
Ah. Well, then.
Carry on…
Senior Attorney
And also? D’oh! Here in the states judges wear ROBES, not GOWNS.
Never too many shoes...
Bit of both actually! Lawyers here are typically gowned if appearing before a judge, although not for Pre-Trials. However, at the moment, judges are not robing for zoom appearances. It is weird all around. We call them robes for a judge as well somehow but gowns for lawyers. BUT just to confuse everyone, the rooms where lawyers’ change rooms in court buildings are called robing rooms.
Never too many shoes...
I am wearing one right now! Just finished a discovery (deposition) by Zoom.
Anon
I am not an attorney so I don’t know ANYONE who is regularly going to the office, and when they do, they’re certainly not wearing suits. You’d stick out like a sore thumb.
pugsnbourbon
I don’t know, but I LOVE this suit. I really only need a suit when I’m interviewing, so there’s no reason to buy it … but the blazer is pretty.
Anon
I just finished a trial (bench not jury) so yes – some of us are still wearing suits! I know there are places that are locked down tight but there are other places that are pretty much open for business pandemic be d*mmed (and to be clear I am not loving that decision but when a federal court judge says “be here” I am going to be there and in a suit).
PNWJ
A friend gave me one this weekend and I thought it may interest this board. (I got the v2 one I think)
https://www.tombihn.com/collections/facemasks/products/clothmaskv2?variant=32567162306623
Their facemasks have an adjustable lanyard so you can just wear it around your neck. I haven’t tried it yet jogging but I think it would work well for bringing up when passing people. The mask itself is very comfortable and can be adjusted to fit as snugly as I want.
Thanks, it has pockets!
I don’t know how I feel about the whole “only wearing your mask when passing people” thing. I feel like unless there’s some reason why you simply cannot cover your face for long periods of time, you should just keep the mask on as a default.
That said, these would be pretty clutch for going to an outdoor restaurant, or socially distanced BBQ, where you do need to take your mask off for eating and drinking, but you want to keep it accessible to put it right back on when needed.
Anonymous
If I am alone outdoors why do I need to wear a mask? That’s just silly.
Anon
See the poster below who contracted COVID from daily runs/walks and masked trips to the grocery store only.
anon
Are you privy to some test results that the poster herself has not yet received? Please stop spreading misinformation.
Anonymous
It’s actually safer not to touch it all the time, for one reason. Also you can relax and not have to be alert for people approaching at any moment.
Anonymous
Without a mask when you run you create a 16 foot cone behind you of respiratory secretions. As long as by alone you mean no one is within 20 feet of you, we are good.
Houston is HOT y'all
While I completely understand the need to mask, when it is 100 degrees and 90% relative humidity, having a piece of cloth over my face while I am exercising is pretty uncomfortable so this is the perfect solution for when I am outside and mostly not around other people.
Layla
Finally got word that my children’s school and the school where I work will be fully remote until at least December. Now I’m trying to cobble together an “office” space aka sticking an IKEA Hemnes desk and small rolling cart behind my bed. Trying to find a room divider screen or other solution to block view of my bed. Any suggestions or other creative ideas? Can try to have a Zoom virtual background as well, but still want a physical divider. Thanks!
Anon
A friend in a small apartment got a rolling grament rack and added a solid colored fabric curtain to hang on it and uses this as his background.
Anon
Honestly, a pretty or solid sheet (steamed for wrinkles) and some tacks in the ceiling or a bungee cord across the room and curtains work really well in a pinch. I’m not buying a bulky folding room divider to fit into my already limited floor space.
Hollis
I hate using virtual backgrounds because I’ve seen how it looks on other people and their heads fade in and out of picture and it’s very distracting. In any case, I bought the natural color screen from here for my room and I’ve loved it. It can be used as a room divider or a privacy shield, and I especially like that it’s lightweight and easy to move it around. https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00179HD1M/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Of Counsel
Google room divider. I bought a soji 4 panel from Target for about $100 that is perfect and folds up to store when I am not using it. They also have some nice ones at Wayfair. It makes the perfect background for Zoom calls.
LOL, suits
I remember those. I have some getting dusty in the back of the closet I haven’t opened for weeks. My boss used to wear them exclusively, but she was in tanktop for our Zoom meeting yesterday,
Anonymous
Even before the pandemic I hadn’t worn a suit in years, unless you call dress + matching blazer a suit. Skirt suits seem so dated.
LaurenB
Unless you’re Nancy Pelosi / Kamala Harris [insert other female politician] in a leadership position, this just seems so foreign to the eye. I’ve noted the female anchors / reporters are getting progressively more casual and no one seems to care.
Trish
Lauren B,
Yes, Fox News put their woman in sleeveless dresses and removed the barriers to seeing their legs for ratings. That isn’t what I am going for when I am in court.
Anon
They were still pretty ubiquitous when I left Big Law 5 years ago.
Anonymous
That is about when I quit wearing them.
Of Counsel
In my jurisdiction they are still pretty ubiquitous for federal court and jury trials. You can get away with a suit material dress with matching jacket but our federal judges still expect women attorneys to wear suits.
Grumpy Old Lady
And I am going to add something here for the younger women attorneys out there – if you are in a room of men in suits with ties and you are not also in a suit (or dress in suiting fabric) with a jacket, you are underdressed. And yes – we do notice and yes – we are judging you. 9 times out of 10 a dress and cardigan or ankle pants is perfectly appropriate but not business formal occasions.
Also, please do not show up in an environment where men are in jackets and ties and then complaint you are cold in your sleeveless sheath dress with bare legs and sandals.
Signed – Grumpy Old Lady who is a tired of the women associates shooting themselves in the foot.
LaurenB
Right, but Big Law was always well behind the rest of the professional-women-working-world when it came to acceptance of business casual (let alone casual-casual). It’s really not a standard for anything other than itself.
Trish
I am with Grumpy Old Lady. If my opposing counsel is in a suit and tie, then I will be in a suit and well. I look better in skirts than pants so why not wear a skirt suit?
Ugh
Ugh, so I think I might finally have COVID :( Have been dealing with progressively worse scratchy throat and dry cough for the past few days. Thankfully no fever or debilitating fatigue, and hoping it stays that way! Going to get tested tomorrow. I’ve been really careful, only going out masked and for essential store trips, but I’m in a big city, so who knows.
Layla
:( Sounds stressful, and wishing you a speedy recovery from whatever you have and quick test results.
Anon
Thank you for being so careful. I hope that it’s a false alarm and that everything goes smoothly with testing. Feel better soon.
Anonymous
Definitely get tested, but it may just be a cold. Both my daughter and I just got over a regular old summer cold (tested and all).
Anonymous
Allergies? I hope for your sake it is just allergies.
Anon
I hope you’re ok. This really does not sound like COVID to me. Those are very common allergy symptoms, and it’s peak allergy season now in much of the US. I have a family member who is a doctor and has seen hundreds of COVID patients and she said only one of them said they’d been living alone and self-isolating except for the grocery store. Everyone else could point to a household member with symptoms, an essential job or a social gathering with non-household members. She said recently everyone is saying “I went to a party but there were only 7 people there!” Or something like that. It really is extraordinarily rare to get it from the grocery store, especially now that most people are masked.
Anon
The blogger Hungry Runner Girl’s parents got it while staying almost entirely at home (ONLY leaving for doctor’s appointments) and visiting family from 15 feet apart. Then again, Hungry Runner Girl herself has been lighting up the town and perhaps there’s more to the story…luckily both parents recovered despite being high-risk.
Anon
I don’t follow this person but I don’t think that’s really inconsistent with what I said. Seeing family even 15 feet apart is still what I’d call a social gathering, especially if they’re indoors and/or unmasked. The duration of contact matters a lot. If you’re indoors with an infected person for an hour you have a much higher chance of getting it than if you pass by an infected person at the grocery store and are only within 10 feet of them for 30 seconds or whatever.
ANON
I also just don’t really believe a lot of people’s stories. I mean, if I had COVID, I wouldn’t want to admit I had gone to a party and hugged friends.
Anon
For sure. I think people do tend to be more honest with doctors (especially ones with compassionate bedside manner) but I’m sure not everyone tells the truth or sees things objectively. I know someone who posted a whine on Facebook about being in quarantine for five months. She has taken multiple plane trips since this began, including one to Florida last month! How is that “quarantine”?!
Cat
yeah, I had to stop following some blogs because although they would talk about how they are being so responsible and masks etc etc… “we took our masks off for a quick picture!” (um, everyone in the picture is crowded together)
Not saying I am perfect by any means but people are definitely reluctant to divulge any risky behavior.
Anonymous
Co-sign just not believing people. I used to work in the drunk-driving part of traffic court and all I heard there was that people only ever had one drink (and never from someone who was a 5 foot tall 90-pound woman, where it would actually make sense).
AIMS
I think a lot of it is not even intentional lying. I see a lot of people in NY think they are following the rules but they have their mask below their nose or they actually pull it down to talk (d’oh!), etc. All those people would tell you that they did everything ‘by the rules’ and yet…
LaurenB
But in all seriousness, the “masks off for the quick picture” really isn’t how it’s spread. I get completely that it’s grating, though.
Cat
@Lauren, yeah I know. I think it’s more that you never see a pic of the blogger with the mask on other than posing in her own house, so are you really being careful or do you just want people to think you are. The group photo alone, if described honestly, isn’t bad unless someone coughs or sneezes!
Anon
Agree. I’ve been battling allergies for months (months!) and those are pretty much my symptoms. I’ve had a negative COVID test.
Anon
+1 on the allergies – hoping it’s that
Ugh
Thanks for all the well-wishes! I’m pretty sure it’s not allergies because I put myself back on Allegra when it first happened a few days ago and it had no effect. Allegra is my go-to for all seasonal allergies and usually works like a charm. I should also mention that I’m indoors 99% of the day in a giant tower with all the windows closed and HVAC running, so pollen count would be very low. I’m hoping it’s a summer cold, although actually, a super mild case of COVID might not be bad either so at least I’ll have had it.
Anon
I had to post here over similar issues. I now take Zyrtec at night and Claritin during the day. I also use nasal sprays. The allergies are bad this year, at least in my area!
Also- my house and probably everyone else’s house is extra dusty from being at home all the time. One of my allergies is dust mites so I know that’s an issue exacerbated by quarantine.
Anon
The allergies are TERRIBLE this year. I normally have a week of spring allergies and maybe two weeks of late summer/early fall allergies. This year, I’ve had allergy symptoms almost non-stop since March with only brief breaks here and there. It’s been completely miserable.
NY CPA
Same here! Haven’t taken allergy meds regularly for years, now I have to take Nasacort 1-2x daily or I get massive sinus headaches.
Sal Goodman
I thought I had allergies – no fever, some post-nasal drip and scratchy throat. Turns out I have COVID. I got tested when a family member learned they were positive. I’ve been very careful, only going out when necessary, but I have been to the courthouse and the jail – always wearing a mask, using sanitizer, and even wearing gloves at the jail. Fortunately, it seems to be a mild case.
Ugh
I really hope this is me! One of the most stressful parts of this is the huge ambiguity over symptoms. I’m also married and husband is totally asymptomatic (again, I hope it stays that way for him).
Cat
If you have it, the good news is that doctors have now had months of experience managing the symptoms. Hope you feel better soon!
Sal Goodman
My husband tested negative and we are trying to keep it that way, since he has some other health challenges. We are now living on separate floors of the house while we both go through quarantine. I am mostly limited to one room, although I venture out to the kitchen for meals and then spray disinfectant everywhere when I finish. I hope everything goes well for you!
Kitten
I had similar mild symptoms and only got tested because I was supposed to see my mom that weekend and didn’t want to risk it. I was positive and my symptoms never got worse and were actually gone by the time I got my test results. My doctor made me quarantine extra long because my symptoms were so mild he was unsure of the true “start date” of my symptoms. At the time I contracted COVID I extremely cautious and only going to the grocery store (masked) and for walks/runs in a mostly empty neighborhood.
Looking back I realize I was actually still going for runs the first week i had COVID (I doubt I infected anyone as my neighborhood was empty and I would run on the street to avoid anyone potentially on the sidewalk/in their yards). It highlights for me why social distancing is so important, even if you feel fine.
No idea if there is any correlation but I made sure to get LOTS of sleep (10+ hours/night), took elderberry/zinc, ate an extremely healthy diet, and daily sun exposure.
Anon
Did you test positive for antibodies afterwards? With symptoms that mild and such a low risk lifestyle, I would be worried it was a false positive. I know they’re rarer than false negatives, but they do happen.
Anon
I live alone and like most, am working from home for the foreseeable future. It is a LOT of alone time. I see friends (masked, distanced, outside) a couple times a week, but I feel like I’m losing it spending this much time on my own. It doesn’t help that I’m on a mostly solo project so I have minimal meetings right now.
I used to be out and about all the time. Even if I worked alone in the office, there was the pleasant hum of coworkers and people walking around. I could pop out for a coffee and see people and feel the buzz of energy. I never truly felt alone… until now.
Help. What can I do? I am spending way too much time alone in my head, and anxious thoughts are taking over. I already do yoga and get out for daily walks, but it doesn’t seem like enough. Tips from fellow WFH solo dwellers?
Anonymous
I’ve been listening to a lot of podcasts while cooking and doing house chores so at least it feels as if someone is talking to me. My next step is considering playing an “office noise generator” while working.
I see a small group (4 of total) friends on the weekends and it’s really helped me. I know this board skews super conservative in staying home ALL THE TIME, but the absolute lack of seeing actual humans not on a screen really f’ed up my mental health. So guess what – I went out to buy things at Target and it felt reassuring to see people (masked) out and about going on with their lives.
Anon
Read books. Work in the yard if you have one. Go for longer walks/runs in a new area. Cook. Take a class (online). Pick up the instrument that you haven’t played in ages. What do you have laying around the house? Do that.
Anonia
HIIT workouts and intense cardio seems to be the only exercise that really turns my anxious brain off for awhile. Can you walk to a coffee shop and pick up a to go order? That might get you near people, but still fairly safe, especially if you are lucky enough to be in a place that mandates masks. Maybe invite a friend for a socially distanced masked walk?
Anonymous
I’m in the same boat and having an incredibly hard time mentally. No tips, but you aren’t alone.
Carmen Sandiego
I’m sorry. This is really hard. I’m not in your exact situation, but am an extreme extrovert/social butterfly, and I really, really miss just chatting with co-workers and friends and seeing people outside of my household. Even though I’m in the office, everyone is in their own offices with their doors closed all the time so my interactions with others are either none or very low. Over the past week or so I have started listening to some podcasts in the mornings and again in the afternoon just to kind of break up the day and feel like I’m talking to someone. (And have been spending a lot of time here chiming in on threads to get some socialization.)
Anne
NPR on in the background? I used to put golf on the TV on in the background too. Zoom religious services? Unitarian ones if you’re not that religious? Virtual volunteering? My friends who lives alone got involved in her local mutual aid society and its provided a lot of virtual local community.
Anonymous
I keep NPR on the in background or the weather channel or antiques roadshow. It helps to see or hear “people” except for the rare times when I need total concentration. But yes — get some virtual people.
Anonymous
Ha! Love “virtual people”
Anon
Hobbies, hobbies, hobbies, preferably ones requiring some effort and skill. Are you outdoorsy? Crafty? Is there something from your childhood that you’d like to pick up again?
ATL rette
This is probably an unpopular decision, but I have a couple friends who are in the same boat (we’re all single, living alone) so we made our own “pod”. We hang out together but are limiting contact outside the pod. We all have similar risk levels and risk tolerance, and it feel SO good to get normal social interaction.
Maybe find some friends who are in the same situation and make a pod?
Anon
Pods were actually recommended in CA not too long ago, so I don’t think that’s controversial. We added my daughter’s boyfriend to our pod which has been very very good for her mental health.
Ribena
I’m also having a really hard time – or rather, I was during full lockdown but it feels a lot better lately. I play classical music radio with some chatter and phone-ins during the day and other than that almost always have a podcast on.
I am doing a lot of outdoor socialising, with other friends who live alone and/or have very low risk work situations (mostly WFH). I’m only doing that at the weekend and only seeing one friend/household per day which helps keep a limit on that. When I say outdoor socialising – that mostly entails sitting at an outdoor restaurant table or four to five feet apart in the park.
The biggest step back to normality has been starting my volunteer shifts in a secondhand charity bookshop again. I’m not un-worried about it but it’s important. It seems like a cliche to say ‘starving children in Africa’, but… starving children around the world. It’s giving me some of that incidental social contact.
Anom
I’m looking at packing up everything in my apt and putting it into storage for several months. Any advice on how keep clothes from getting ruined when putting it in storage?
Back story is that I live in NYC with DH and two elementary school aged children, but due to WFH and remote schooling and childcare needs, we are thinking about packing up our apt and living with my parents for the next several months for the childcare help. And paying for a NYC apt that we are not living in currently is ridiculous.
Layla
Ziploc sells large, zippered tote storage bags that I’ve found helpful to store off-season clothing in (take up less space than hard plastic bins.)
https://ziploc.com/en/Products/Closet-Storage/Flexible-Totes/Flexible-Tote-Jumbo
Anon
We did this when we were renovating and displaced for about 5 months. Keep in mind that everything will get dusty. Upholstery will need to be steam cleaned, everything “hard” will need to be wiped and all clothes will need to be rewashed. Not the end of the world, but just allow time for all of this on the back end.
Anon
Get packets of silica gel to put in the boxes to keep away moisture and mustiness. You can but it from Amazon, hardware stores, etc.
MJ
All boxes should be lined with clear plastic garbage bags. Tie up all of the bags as you pack each box, so your clothes are sealed. If you get plastic bins, make sure the lids are strong enough to be stackable. If you storing clothes, make sure they are clean before storage. Nearly everything can be folded neatly. It will be annoying to iron on the back end. Alternately, consider getting wardrobe boxes, but again, cover everything in plastic. Agree that you should add silica or DampRid to your storage place and check in at least every few weeks if possible.
Hope this helps.
Anonymous
For any really nice clothes, can you send them to a cleaners and have them store them after cleaning them?
Carrots
So, I’m at the point where I’m maybe, possibly considering buying a property (which is to I’m still working on emergency savings, condo vs. house, and wouldn’t consider until I have a double digit % down payment)?? For someone who is still thinking about it, does anyone have any good resources to point towards (books, youtube videos, bloggers, whatever)? TIA
Anon
What’s your market? The resources vary greatly based on your market and the type of home you’re buying.
And obviously it’s a personal decision but once I let go of the notion that I had to save a 20% down payment (not necessary in my market but may be in others to be competitive) it freed up a lot of cash flow anxiety (for repairs and remodeling) about buying a home.
Carrots
Right now I’m in the DC metro area.
Anon
Again, I liked Frugalwoods (she’s been recommended here a few times in the past few days). She had a great series of posts about the factors that went into buying real estate in Vermont, but also the factors they considered when buying their house in Cambridge, MA (a very hot market). A lot of the stuff she wrote about the latter was stuff I hadn’t considered before.
Marriage Motivation
I am 40 years old and American. My significant other is not a U.S. citizen. He is a citizen of a country with sensible leadership and strong social programs such as universal healthcare.
I have considered myself a confirmed bachelorette for a long time. But now I wonder if I should consider marrying him and getting that second passport. Is this nuts?
OH. My net worth is around $3M. Healthcare for life could accelerate my retirement by decades.
Anonymous
In that case, mazel to you. Consider a prenup though unless he has more $$$ than you.
Anonymous
It’s not that simple. I am married to a citizen of another country and don’t automatically get a passport. If I wanted to move there, I’d have to apply for a visa.
Also this is a fake question anyway.
LaurenB
Anonymous at 3:46, are you aware that different countries have different rules for the entry of their citizens’ spouses, so what might apply to you might not apply to the poster? You’re welcome.
Anonymous
Your “you’re welcome”phrasing sounds like “bless your heart.” Is it your intention to be rude? Because you’re not doing anyone any favors. If it’s putting you out, you’re more than welcome to stop.
anon
Are you the same Anonymous who wrote “this is a fake question anyway”? If so, you’re the rude one. LaurenB was just following your lead.
Senior Attorney
Not nuts. I think it sounds totally reasonable.
Anon
I won’t say “nuts” because I understand the impulse, but I think it’s unwise. I suspect a lot of people will disagree with me though.
anon
Marry SO and adopt me.
:D
LaurenB
I would get a second passport in a heartbeat if I were in a position to. Especially if god forbid Trump wins.
Equestrian Attorney
You could, absolutely. Make sure you find out (1) whether marriage does allow you to get a passport within a reasonable time frame and/or whether you will need to move there before getting one; and (2) what implications marriage would have on your financial situation in his country as well as your current jurisdiction – not to be paranoid but it’s good to have a sense of the rules on joint property, taxation, inheritance, etc. Obviously you need him on board but I’m guessing that is the case :)
Anon
If you think you’re gonna marry this person anyway, I’d say it’s very wise. But no, don’t marry your S.O. for a passport, seems ill advised from a personal relationship pov.
Anonymous
That’s not how it works. You don’t just show your marriage certificate and get a passport. You have to apply for a spousal visa, you and your spouse have to move to his home country, and then maybe you can apply for citizenship.
Marriage Motivation
To be clear, I am well aware that I would not get a passport right away. But it is possible for me to move there, marry him, and wait out the 2 year period to passport issuance.
SO has neutral net worth but he does have a modest military pension. Both of us would be open to a prenup.
Thanks all!
Anon
Two giant questions: Are you otherwise long term committed to this person? And why have you decided against marriage until this option popped up?
anon
I feel the judgement in this question. DH and I weren’t going to marry until we did for immigration reasons. There are lots of personal principles that make us not a fan of the construct of a legal marriage and we both are secular.
We were, however, committed to each other long term and pragmatic enough to seal the deal when it meant that staying unmarried would impact our life in a big way (either not being able to live in the same country or losing out on a great job opportunity).
Anonymous
What do you mean by a passport? Is that related to citizenship?
Senior Attorney
Yes, countries only issue passports to their citizens (keeping in mind that there is such a thing as dual citizenship). So people generally use “passport” interchangeably with “citizenship.”
Anon
Sounds like a European. You would have to move there first on a visa and live for a certain number of years to get the passport. Unless there were serious concerns about finances, taxes etc in your place I would do it, not just for a passport but the cultural experience as well. With the spousal visa you should also be able to work, the only issue would be what do you do for a living and what opportunities are there where he is from. All taken into account, only marry this person if you envision a life together not just as a means to an end.
Anon
Will you automatically get healthcare just by marrying a citizen? I think even in some countries with universal healthcare it’s not as simple as you’re making it out to be.
Marriage Motivation
No, I will not “automatically” get healthcare or citizenship. Worst case, I might have to give up my demanding job to live a simpler life with SO for 2 years (rely on pension, savings, investments, etc.) before I qualify for citizenship.
You’re right, it is not simple. It is a long-term play. A couple years of inconvenience seems worth the potential gains to me, even moreso if Trump wins again as someone above mentioned.
Anonymous
Will you be able to retain your US citizenship or are you willing to let it go?
Anon
Yeah I guess I just feel like it’s a completely different question then. I wouldn’t marry someone I didn’t love for healthcare, but if i had a partner I was committed to for life and the only thing between me and free healthcare was filling out some paperwork, I’d definitely consider it. But uproot my life and move to a foreign country where I know no one for years, just to have a chance at becoming a citizen? No way! I feel like you framed the question more as “do I fill out the paperwork” and what you’re describing in the follow up is completely different.
Nesprin
FYI US taxes on citizens abroad is something to look at carefully.
Anon
If you consider yourself a confirmed bachelorette do you really want to tie yourself down via marriage and move to a foreign country to build a new life? Not trying to dissuade you if you love this person and want to be married, but if healthcare if your primary motivator I would not do it.
Anonymous
IDK … free healthcare for life even if I get divorced after a few years? I’m in!
Anonymous
If Trump wins, I would seriously consider starting the process. But don’t assume your US prenup is going to be enforced if you divorce and the proceedings are in another country. Get good legal counsel.
AnonNYC
This. Know a lot of people who’ve been surprised by how different divorce settlements are in the UK (and how their pre-nup is basically a ‘suggestion’).
But also, the fundamental question is – do you want to live and retire in the other country and are you willing to subject your assets to their tax regime (i.e. have you evaluated how they’ll tax money you bring in?).
Anon
I think some commenters have missed an important point if you are still reading – depending on the country, you may only be entitled to free healthcare while you are in the country and meeting an ongoing residency requirement. Out of country or out of region care may be limited or non existent.
I’m an American who now has that sweet free healthcare (albeit through an economic immigration, not family immigration pathway). Don’t marry or move to a new country for this perk, do it because that is where/how you want for your life long term.
Anon
I’m looking for a few pieces of clothing that are appropriate for the driving range/golf course. Ideally would not like to spend too much money. Shorts are tough because I have a relatively small waist and large thighs. Do they make A-line dresses?
Anonymous
They do make A-line golf dresses. I have one from Nike Golf that is flattering (though that line no longer exists). Skorts (Lululemon used to make some, or Target even) are cute too.
Anonymous
It’s too much money, but Lilly always has a dress on offer for golf. Probably other places that sell women’s golf attire (or golf/tennis attire). Country club pro shops tend to let you shop there even if you aren’t a member there. And there are always local sporting goods stores.
Anonymous
This is what a skort is for
Anonie
It sounds like you and I may have somewhat similar body types and I also steer clear of shorts. Athleta makes adorable stretchy skirts for working out. I love the one I own and plan to buy more!
Anon
Thank you! That’s exactly the type of thing I am looking for.
Hollis
I’ve bought golf clothing from 6pm at huge discounts – you may want to check there. also, there’s ebay and poshmark. you can find brand new with tag items and save $$.
kk
I play a lot of golf- Check out the Puma Newport dress. I have one in navy and it’s SO flattering- the shoulders are cut a little narrow and the skirt is full. I wear it with a jean jacket around town, and alone or with a 1/4 zip at the golf course. The only downside is that the pockets in the skirt sometimes swing around on me when I hit the ball- so I just leave a tee and ballmarker in there, and leave the balls in my bag.
Fireplace
We have a fire place in our living room that has a very boxy mantle and surround. It’s almost as if the fireplace itself is framed, with the frame protruding from the wall and the fireplace set back. There are also two odd ledges shooting out the length of the wall – it creates a shelf about 2/3 up the side of the fire place and then drops to the floor. Admittedly it’s very hard to describe. It’s just very clear that the 40-year prior owner of this house opted to cover up what was there, possibly originally, vs remove. It’s fine I suppose, but I’m not a huge fan and I’m SO CURIOUS about what’s under there.
A house in the ‘hood is currently for sale. Same style/vintage home and not updated whatsoever. Their fireplace per the listing photos is old, brick and has brass surrounds. Not modern at all but I find so much more charming than what we have here, and full of potential. I’d be very happy to find something similar under this boxy coverup attempt.
Would you rather: (1) leave it be, the devil you know is better than the devil you don’t, or (2) risk opening up the boxy surround and finding out what’s actually going on back there.
I don’t need another project, but I’m home, I’m bored and I keep staring at this dang fireplace.
Anon
So your home is vintage (like the neighbor’s)? If it is, I’d tear that sucker down. If you’re in a cookie-cutter new-build where you’re not really going to uncover character, meh.
OP
1958 construction, New England. Lots has been updated and tastefully. This dang fireplace surround haunts me. Truly, it’s a athletically just OK but I’m just so curious, and 24/7 life at home has me sitting on my hands. FWIW, nearly identical house down the street is 1957 so it’s gotta be similar… unless someone updated it with like black marble in the 80s.
I knock on it and it’s sort of hollow sounding…. what could it be!?
Anonymous
If you hate what’s there and have the $$$ to replace it with something you like if there doesn’t turn out to be buried treasure beneath it, demolish away!
Cat
I’m on Team Investigate.
Anonymous
Maybe you could cut out a square of the wall (assuming it’s sheet rock) and see what’s behind there. A square of sheet rock is not that hard to repair, if you decide you don’t want to go any further.
anonshmanon
This.
Anon
Tear it down! You don’t like it anyway. Find out what’s underneath.
Report back to your nosy c-r3tte sisters.
Op
I think my husband might kill me but I’m 100% going to. Thanks for the nudge. Will take a few weeks but I’ll report back!!
Anon
+1
Anon
Open it up and report back!
Anonymous
Has anyone tried p.volve? What’s it like? Is the equipment worth it?
JTM
Has anyone bought a treadmill in the last few months? I’d love to hear what model you bought, where you found it and if you’d recommend your model.
My husband and I have decided that we really don’t feel comfortable going back to the gym, and walking/running outside isn’t always an option for us (especially when it’s winter & icy outside). We’d like to get a treadmill but it feels like there’s nothing in stock except super fancy models and I’d rather not spend $5k on a home treadmill.
Anon
Pre-COVID, we bought a model from a gym that was upgrading to new ones. Commercial quality treadmill, fraction of the cost. I think we paid $500? It was on our local FB Marketplace. I am by no means a pro runner (the most I can do in one go is 4 miles), but I’ve been doing those modest distances for 20 years now, and I’ve learned that I have Opinions about what I run on ha.
Anon
I bought a gym quality treadmill this way something like 15 years ago and it’s still going strong. We replaced the belt once. Currently three people in my house use it regularly (I will admit, everyone but me – husband and two late teens)
CountC
I bought one a couple of months pre-COVID but it’s probably more than you want or need. I wanted the high incline for training but it’s not something many people probably want or need! https://www.nordictrack.com/treadmills/nordictrack-x11i-incline-trainer
Definitely recommend NordicTrack though!
Tea/Coffee
We just bought a Sole F85. Great treadmill although I haven’t used it a ton yet (pre-emptive purchase for the winter). Quiet and seems extremely sturdy.
Also very very very heavy. Pay to have it delivered and installed!