Suit of the Week: Misook

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1. Oh, man. The last thing I need is another suit, but I love this very much.

   1. I do too and I even need another suit, I’d say, but the skirt looks see-through, I think? It’s 90-someting and humid in NY today so the idea of a slip also holds zero appeal right now.

      1. I have never seen Misook that is see-through, for what that’s worth.

         1. It does look see through in that photo, I agree.

            Mistook tends to be unlined heavyweight knits in my experience. I’ve tried lots but only have one jacket from them. Which, now that I think of is kind of grandmother of the bride! But it’s the kind of thing I use for presentations or work dinners – it’s a tweed in shades of blue and has fringey edges like a Chanel jacket, but is longer. I wear it with a navy sheath. Or wore it. Imagining wearing clothes like that today feels like make-believe land.

         2. I think there is some light shining on the skirt, not that it is see through. My summer Misook pieces are lightweight but not see-through.

   2. The grey and black dress featured in the other link is gorgeous

   3. Gorgeous.

   4. In my pre-pandemic life, I would have worn this blazer to court at least once a month. Now, I have no idea when I will actually step foot into a courtroom again.

      1. I made myself depressed with this comment. RIP to all the fun parts of litigation.

         1. I commented make-believe land above, and yep.

2. I’m applying for a board position (a state government advisory board). I feel like I’ve really nailed my letter of interest, but I’m not so sure about my resume. I’m not trying to get a job, so I feel like it should be different from a resume I’d use for job searching, but I’m not entirely sure how. Any tips or suggestions for this kind of thing?

   1. Focus more on your association membership(s) and any active partnerships you’ve built.

3. I have 2 pairs of Thursday boots and they have been excellent through the NYC winters. They’re definitely actually very well made. I heard of the company through a friend so I had no idea that they had such an instagram presence.

   1. I got a pair of Thursdays after they were recced here, and I really like them! They seem super well-made.

   2. No idea whether they are comfy enough for fussy feet like mine, but they look so good in the real world that I asked a coworker where they were from—and I generally like la canadienne, aquatalia, etc so was surprised to learn they were an internet company.

   3. I love love love my Thursday boots and always get compliments on them from my most stylish friend :)

4. I’m bored. I’m a partner at an eat what you kill firm and unfortunately, this impacts my take home pay. I know I need to “use” lean times in a productive way – what does that mean, exactly? and what doesn’t cost a lot of money? Lunch and coffees are out in my super high COVID area. I’m done with CLE for another year. Write articles? Email clients and try to shake trees? I’m in an advisory practice and everyone has been pretty quiet or “nothing now, thanks!” for almost a quarter. What works for you?

   1. Zoom coffees.

   2. You may not even check this since it’s the next day, and you should probably ignore my advice since I’m in sales and purchasing (duel role – companies have to sell me on their products before I recommend/sell them) in a completely different industry and am not a lawyer, but I would be so totally turned off by a zoom coffee invitation from anyone. However I do have one account manager who has started doing bi-weekly emails about the current issues facing the supply chain (very relevant) with a real take on what they can/can’t do to help. The last one came yesterday and was bleak AF. However it’s made me REALLY trust this account manager/company and I’m using them whenever possible. I also am looking for his emails and will actually read them because they have current and pertinent information to my operations.

5. Hi there – any recs (food, activities, other) for a couple of days in Kennebunkport in late August? I’ll be spending a couple of days there mid-week on the way to a wedding in Portland.

   1. I live here, and this summer has been crazy. Even midweek the sidewalks are so crowded that people are spilling into the streets. Get reservations now – like tonight. Everything is booked up weeks in advance. I like Lost Fire, Hurricane, and Batson River Distillery for food. I find most of the food in town is vastly overpriced for what it is. Definitely go to Rococo’s if you like ice cream – it is worth the wait. The sea kayaking tours are fun and get you away from the crowds. Go to Parson’s beach – you have to park half a mile a way and walk in, but it is lovely and uncrowded.

6. I went on a first date last night and at one point he started talking how Aziz Ansari should not have been cancelled and that what he did wasn’t that weird. He even said his sister told him
   women are more cautious / careful of their safety on dates than men, but he still thought it was all fine

   We were talking about politics a bit, but it just seemed like a weird topic to bring up and want to keep talking about on a date.

   1. This doesn’t sound like a guy you should have a second date with!

      I felt what happened to Aziz was probably more about him being clueless and insensitive than malicious (from what I call he thought it was a hookup and she thought it was a date, and she was offended he was treating her like a hookup) but just the fact that your date felt it necessary to bring it up seems very weird to me.

      1. Yeah the situation may not have been so malicious, but why bring it up at all! Was he trying to let me know that he also can’t follow social cues around hooking up?

         1. I met my now husband via online dating and he was one of my only first dates who didn’t spend the entire date bitching about his ex!!

   2. Yuck. Don’t go out with him again if he doesn’t respect women or our safety.

   3. The fact that he chose to bring that up on a first date is a huge red flag to me. How bizarre.

      1. +1. It’s the timing for me.

      2. +2. I can picture jerks using this as a first-date conversation idea to sound out whether you…have a problem with being pressured into things, think MeToo was a justified movement, whatever.

         1. I saw a thing on Redd1t about a study in which the question “have you ever r-ped someone?” was asked, but then the question “have you ever held someone down to have sex with them against their will?” was asked of the same people and they got a lot more yes answers.

            I feel like OP’s date would feel a lot of sympathy for the people who answered no then yes.

            1. Here’s the abstract. I did not read the entire study

               https://www.liebertpub.com/doi/pdf/10.1089/vio.2014.0022

   4. The Aziz Ansari case does require nuance, but bringing it up on Date 1 is super weird.

      1. +1.

   5. I would nope right out of that real fast

   6. I agree that’s it’s super weird to bring this up on a first date. There are two sides to a story and sure it’s debatable how much in the wrong Aziz Ansari was, but a first date seems like the wrong time and place for that kind of debate. It’s not even relevant news that would come up organically.

   7. Bringing it up is weird but keep talking about it is doubly weird. This reminded me of the time a guy brought up not wanting to be in a polygamous relationship. It was weird because unless you WANT a polygamous relationship, monogamous is the assumed default. And no, it wasn’t that he had been caught in an unwanted polygamous relationship in the past to warrant bringing it up.

   8. If by “talking about politics” you mean Cuomo and he brought this up as if it’s relevant to the investigation and subsequent resignation of Cuomo, I probably wouldn’t have sat through the date.

      1. Not about Cuomo, and thinking back idk why I didn’t get up and walk out – but it came up because I work in something politics-adjacent and we were talking about progressive politics. I think this was actually his help of the “left being too extreme”. Gets worse and worse

7. In our state, K-12 schools start back next week. What’s that likely to do to my Labor Day plans? My fall plans?

   Last fall, I pushed a major life event back to this fall. At the time, that looked reasonable. As recently as June, that looked reasonable. Now . . . I just am shaking my head. I actually feel worse about things generally than I did last year at this time with COVID.

8. Need a rec for an L&E attorney barred in TN please! Geographic location isn’t important. Thanks!

   1. Plaintiff or defendant?

   2. Branstetter Stanch firm for plaintiff side

   3. Oh jeez, duh. Plaintiff, but thank you!

9. I had an odd interaction with a friend and I need a gut check about whether I’m overthinking it. Friend is pregnant and she knows I’m still TTC, we started trying around the same time. She’s been distant and snippy lately but I chalked it up to pregnancy stress. We’d talked about baby names in the past and she knows I’m pretty set on my boy name, let’s say it’s Arthur. She’s having a boy; initially she had chosen a name but mentioned the other day that she’s now seriously considering Arthur. I jokingly said, ha you better not!, expecting her to respond with something like, oh don’t change your baby name because of me it would be cute for our kids to have a friend with the same name. Instead she said, well they don’t have to play together. Does that mean we’re not going to be friends in the future, I had always assume our kids would play together whenever we hung out. She’s also canceled plans with me three times this week, which I again chalked up to pregnancy exhaustion but now I’m not so sure. I’m feeling pretty hurt and I’m not sure what to think about this.

   1. I recommend having a honest conversation with your friend because something may be going on, but when it comes to baby names, you should name your baby whatever you want, regardless of what friends are doing. They can still play together and it will be a non-issue.

      1. Oh in case it wasn’t obvious, I don’t believe “stealing” someone’s name is a thing, everyone can name their kids whatever they want. I was truly joking and was laughing as I said “don’t even!” or whatever I said. Her response that they don’t have to play together really threw me.

         1. Sounds like you were trying to make a joke, but she took you seriously and make a snarky comment in response.

      2. Agree with all this.

         There’s no such thing as “dibs on names.”

      3. As a completely irrational pregnant woman who is pretty angry about my husband doing things like scratching his head or pacing too much, I second the advice to have an honest no pressure conversation (and probably hold off on plans for a bit). I have very little social grace right now and energy enough to feed and bathe myself and not much else. (Note that, at 36 weeks, this is due to anemia, but until 20 weeks it was purely hormonal.) It could easily have been a misunderstanding.

         1. (please note that I know that scratching his head is not a reasonable cause for anger lol)

   2. This has got to be fake. You are fighting over a baby name when you aren’t even pregnant?

      1. We’re not fighting over a name, she can name her kid whatever she wants! I think I said in the OP I was joking and I really was! It’s such a weird take that folks are jumping on me like I was trying to call dibs.

      2. Right? This is like a bad AITA post.

      3. This is a rude response. The OP is struggling with TTC and her friend is riding the roller coaster with pregnancy hormones. My husband and I talked about potential baby names… four months into dating? People think about baby names before they conceive. It’s a thing.

         Sounds like the OP’s friend is either really struggling with pregnancy or is one of those women who stops being friends with non-mothers the moment she is with child.

      4. Lol y’all haven’t met my sister :). If I had wanted to name this child Evelyn there would have been problems. And sister likely won’t be pregnant for at least another year.

         1. I kind of get that with a sibling. I would have no problem with my friends having kids with the same name, but wouldn’t want my kids and their cousins to share a name. (My cousin-in-law and brother share a name, and even that gets confusing on occasion.). If I had been set on a name, I would have been hurt by my sister using it.

      5. Well that’s rude! I had a secret baby name (Shayla) that my friend Lainey stole. She knew that was my baby name and I made it up so I didn’t think she’d take it.

         1. My roommate had a pet rat named Shayla in college, around the time that this episode originally aired. Made it extra funny.

            1. Lololol! I’m glad someone caught the reference!

   3. It sounds like she may not have heard a joking tone and lashed out at what felt like might become a contentious issue between you.

   4. You both like the same name, and her take was that your kids “don’t have to play together”?!

      It sounds like she’s either really not herself right now, or is dropping your friendship in a rude and mean way. I’d probably stop contacting her for a while and see what happens.

   5. I mean… why can’t she name her kid ‘Arthur’? Even if you had a baby with that name I think it’s fine that other people in the world also like the name and use it, including your friend. That being said, not all friendships last forever. I wouldn’t read too much into her cancelling plans in the near term but if she consistently does it maybe things are just going in different directions. you could always just ask her about it directly as well.

   6. Agree with others that you don’t have dibs on a baby name, especially vs a person who has an actual baby on the way while you’re still in the TTC phase, but also agree that if your friend is being a d1ck you don’t owe them more of your time.

      1. It doesn’t sound like OP is trying to call dibs or is telling her friend not to name her baby whatever the name is. But also I think it’s a little mean spirited for friend to take that name, if she wasn’t already considering it. If I were TTC at the same time as a friend and I got lucky and got pregnant first, I wouldn’t rub it in my friend’s face. Like not only do I get a baby first but I’m taking your name. It’s very weird.

   7. You know how some women slowly ghost single friends in favor of “couple friends” when they get into a relationship or married? She might be one of those friends that fades into “friends with families with little kids” once she gets pregnant. Chances are once you get pregnant she’ll show back up to give unsolicited disengenuous advice. She’s a fake friend and I wouldn’t miss the fade out.

      1. Local BF and I were pregnant at the same time but I lost the pregnancy. And she pretty much ghosted me after that. We still went to the same church and it just really stung, especially since I did have another baby later. I still wasn’t good enough to be back in even though our children are less than 12 months apart.

   8. In what World do you have plans with the same friend three times in one week?

      1. I think it’s pretty normal to re-plan things if someone has to cancel? Friend asked me to go to lunch then felt tired so we planned dinner. Then she canceled dinner so we planned coffee. Then she canceled coffee etc etc.

   9. Your friend is being weird, but Arthur is a great name and I hope that it’s the actual name at issue, and you both name your future children that, resolve this issue and the two baby Arthurs become BFFs.

      1. + a million!

   10. My son is named Austin. When my younger brother’s wife got pregnant, he called and asked if it was ok if he named his son Austin too. I said sure, different last names, no worries. But I said I would have named my son Augustin and called him Austin, because 1) Austin is the nickname for Augustin and it’s good to have a nickname or not; 2) I had recently found out that we have Augustins in our paternal family line; and 3) because Austin is so common. And, after hearing that story, my parents always wanted to call my son Gus because Gus is the nickname for Augustin, and parents thought it was funny. So my nephew is named Augustin and called Gus. My brother was happy – he and his wife love the name Gus and also Augustin. Win win.

       Second story- My sister named her son William and called him Liam from Day One. Her sister in law called and said that SIL wanted to name her son William but promised to call him Will. Different last names. My sister was not happy. Of course, day one SIL started calling him Liam and my sister was irate. I just laugh because you can’t control other people. Now my nephew Liam is grown and calls himself Will.

       I agree no dibs on names.

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