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Workwear sales of note for 3.22.23:
- Ann Taylor – Up to 40% off full-price pants and shirts; extra 30% off all sale styles
- Athleta – 20% off shorts, swim, linen & more
- Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything; extra 15% off purchase
- Boden – Up to 50% off
- Brooks Brothers – Clearance styles to 70% off. Some pretty serious markdowns!
- Express – Extra 40% off clearance for up to 60% off
- J.Crew – 25% off your purchase; up to 50% off special-occasion styles
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 50% off everything; extra 15% off 3 styles; extra 20% off 4 styles; extra 50% off clearance
- Sephora – Up to 50% off select beauty
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price dresses, skirts, accessories & shoes
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
- What are your favorite parts of a typical day?
- At what point in your life (age, income level, whatever) were you able to take an annual vacation?
- What shoes can I keep at the office to go for mid-day walks (that go with everything)?
- How do you release stress or trauma that’s stored in the body?
- What are the best “networking for women events” you’ve ever been to?
- I feel like we’re burning through any savings we acquire…
- I hate my job and make 30% of what DH makes – should I quit?
- What do you keep in your office?
Speaking of colorful things…I just bought another “The Skirt” in the Red Cordovan color while it was on sale. I love the plum-y dark red color but then realized this morning that ALL my sweaters clash with it! :( So annoyed when this happens with new separates! The good news is that I also bought the dark green color and am wearing that with a beige boatneck sweater.
Could you wear it with navy or cream? I think beige would look nice too, but maybe it would need to be a bit more like camel.
Despite yesterday’s discussion of how cheesy black and red together is, I’m wearing my red skirt from a year or so ago with a black JCrew drape neck top and the charcoal gray fleece asymmetrical wrap cardigan I posted yesterday and I think it looks great.
I like red and black together, especially when the red is not a bright tomato red color.
I also love red with navy, gray, camel, and chocolate brown.
I wore a red skirt with black tights, black boots, black tank, and a black and white tweed sweater yesterday. And I thought it looked awesome!
Ack, i totally do that, too!! In fact I have a skirt hanging in my closet that i have no tops to wear with right now. So terrible. ;oP
The Skirt in Red Day! I’m wearing mine, in a true/dark red (don’t remember what it was called), with a chocolate brown merino v-neck and brown boots. If your red is purply-red, I’d suggest blue tones — navy, sky blue, maybe even purple.
Oooh, I am getting in here early!
My best friend – who lives about 1500 miles away from me – just found out she’s being made a partner this year. I want to send her a gift. Any ideas or things you’ve given in the past? I am just so excited for her!
Nice champagne? I feel like you can’t go wrong with that for a celebratory milestone event.
When I made partner, my aunt got me a Waterford crystal Christmas ornament marked with the year. All these years later, it’s a lovely memento. By the way, the Ross-Simons website has some 2013 Waterford ornaments on sale.
Don’t judge me for being two days late, but I wanted to chime in! I’m at that point in my career — all the friends still at firms are making partner. I gave one friend a nice pen (I figured she’d be signing more documents now!), my BFF a piece of jewelry (I knew she’d been lusting after a particular right-hand ring), and my husband a piece of art for his new, bigger partner office (similar to the BFF – he’d been drooling over it and would never have bought it for himself).
Champagne is also great if you have a smaller budget – KLG is right that you can never go wrong with champagne!
Just wanted to say a big thank you for all the thoughtful gift suggestions on the morning post. I printed out the entire thread. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Second! and thanks to whoever posted the Restoration Hardware link yesterday; I found a couple of absolutely perfect items for husband and son.
Hey… that was me. You’re welcome
Is anyone an attorney for the state of Massachusetts? I’d love to hear about working for the state- are there bonuses, raises, retirement plan? What does it mean to be bargaining unit? Overall do you like it?
Govt Attorney Non MA
Not in MA, but from my experience in neighboring state govt: no bonuses, great retirement plan, great benefits, raises are by grade and contract or promotion. Bargaining unit for us means that you’re essentially in a union. That means you pay a nominal fee like $5-10/paycheck and your contract is negotiated by your union. So, the good — you don’t have to ask for a raise, you get one automatically; the bad — you are tied to contractually mandated increases. Also, the union has its own interests so for example right now we are without a contract because the union wants to ensure that any lay offs are done by seniority and they’d probably trade nominal pay increases for that assurance, whereas I’m not that senior and would vastly prefer more money at the expense of such a protection.
Can’t speak for MA, but as for me, I LOVE it. The hours are great, the work is interesting, the job security and pension are appreciated, and the work life balance is hard to beat. Sometimes it can be frustrating to know someone who’s been in the system for 30 years is making more than you for the same work or less, but every job has its frustrations. Mine are worth it.
TJ for a great shampoo commercial, of all things, being circulated by We Are Ultraviolet. Basically says that if you’re an overachieving chick you should own it.
Pertaining to the thread this morning, I have an amazon wishlist, as does my SO, and we both get some gifts from that and some from what we want to get for each other. My mother, on the other hand, asks for a list, then completely ignores it every year, and I end up with cartoon-printed oven mitts, really horrifically ugly mittens from the local craft fair, and “first aid kits” in plastic storage bins that would take up every inch of precious storage space in my apartment’s tiny bathroom.
How do you ladies deal with unwanted gifts that are just incompatible to your lifestyle, apartment size, or style? Particularly when they’re not the kind of thing you can return? In the past few years, the gifts have changed from things I wouldn’t have bought myself but usually don’t dislike, to gifts I think my mother would have bought for herself, and I would never in a million years use or wear. I feel ungrateful getting rid of these things, but- tiny apartment!
First, I always say thank you. Then, I usually make an attempt at using it (although I know it’s not always possible), then stash it somewhere out of sight. And then I stumble upon it months or years later (or when we move next) and finally donate it or throw it away.
Haha, that’s what I’m doing now. I’m running out of space, though! (Bedroom closet is full of clothes and camping gear, 1 hall closet I have to share with a roommate.)
I’m trying to figure out if there’s any way to ask my mother to just keep the money, and we can go out for a girl’s day, but she loves buying gifts. RAWR
Perhaps when mom asks for a list say something to the effect of “You know, I have everything I need and there’s nothing I really want, but I would love to try X restaurant/do a spa day/tickets to Y show/anything else activity or service-based.” This way she still has something to give you when everyone is opening presents, and you don’t wind up with random junk.
This is exactly what I do. I just accept that the gift-giver may like the process of buying gifts, so I play my part in acting like I love them.
If you live in a tiny apartment like I do, you just have to be bold about getting rid of unwanted gifts. Donate what you can, recycle what you can, and toss the rest. You will feel momentarily bad about it, but having uncluttered closets and drawers is critical to your happiness in a small apartment.
And for a longer-term strategy, I’ve been trying to really go overboard with praise when I like something that my mother or MIL gives me, hoping that they will repeat that idea in the future!
Is this something you could address with her without any hurt feelings? That may be the first thing to try. You could use the first aid kit as an example and point out your lack of storage space. If she’s looking for something more personal (and that you won’t notice has been purchased from your wishlist), maybe try a fall shopping trip where you casually point out things you like. Could you just agree to not do presents and share some type of experience together as your “gift”?
If you try all that and she continues buying you stuff you hate, I think you hide it in your house for a year in case she asks, then toss/donate it.
I’m considering asking her to save the money for a plane ticket instead, since I’d much rather get to see her than have another hand-knit (not by her) bobble hat in magenta pink. But we’re Jewish, and she’s very firmly in the 8 presents camp. Oy vey.
HaHaHa – Baconpancakes! I actually LOL’d at the “…but we’re Jewish.” Curious – do you eat bacon pancakes or do you just like the name?
Oh, I love bacon and pancakes. Haven’t made them yet in a single form food, but I will. We’re very Jewish, except when it comes to food, because we were traveling in Africa and were served a plate of unidentifiable meat, I decided it wasn’t worth it to keep Kosher while traveling, and subsequently fell in love with all the amazing treif foods out there. I love bacon and Smithfield spiral cut honey ham and oysters, oh my!
I believe the hobbits had a way of dealing with unwanted gifts. They created a Mathom House at Michel Delving to store all of them. Perhaps we could create a [this site] Mathom House. Except we’d periodically host white elephant parties with all the stuff that accumulated…
Whoa, nerd cred, Susedna!
Come to think of it, I think we did consider a white elephant of terrible gifts at thissite a month or so ago.
The birthday hobbit also gave everyone presents, instead of receiving them, so there were even more gifts flying around! It kind of reminds me how my mom would give us little presents on Mother’s Day because she was so happy she was able to have kids. (2 of us, born when she was 38 and 41.)
That is incredibly sweet-what a mom!
She’s pretty great. :)
This is an awesome idea.
Um. BEST IDEA EVER.
Have you thought about bringing it into the office? I’ve never worked in an office that did an organized swap but my old office had an agreement that you could put leftover food from events or things from home on one of the tables in the breakroom and anything on that table was up for grabs.
I’ve done this. My old office was a couple of hundred people and things like small household goods, fashion accessories, etc. that were placed in the breakroom with a “free to a good home” note usually disappeared quite quickly!
My rule with this stuff is to keep the most recent couple of unwanted gifts from the person and get rid of the rest. That way when they next visit me, I can be like “oh look at your hideous potholder being so useful in my kitchen!” and with luck they will have forgotten about the hideous dish towels they got me three cycles ago. It doesn’t always work; my mom has a habit of buying me cute little gag gifts (cute but I just don’t have the room) and she did ask me about one from several cycles ago. I think I told her I took it into the office but that wouldn’t work for more practical stuff.
prof on a bike
This problem only gets worse for me as my mother gets older. My strategy has been to try to train my mother towards gifting consumables — first, by talking about how so-and-so fictional person brought me back chocolate for their recent travels to X country and it was just the best! gift! ever! And then, by telling her how much I liked it when she brought me back spices instead of her usual touristy knick knack type things. In my experience, telling her what was wrong with the presents she was getting me before didn’t work, because she didn’t see how I could possibly not want X awesome thing, and maybe more importantly, she couldn’t think of what she might get me as an alternative. So I spent a bunch of time trying to think of things that she would still enjoy shopping for (trinkets to pick up on her trips) but wouldn’t frustrate me as much. It’s worked partially, but I still do end up with a lot of bargain finds that I don’t want. I keep one out of ten or so, and donate/garage sale/regift the rest.
When I lived in a very small apartment, every time gifts came up in conversations with my mom, I would emphasize our small apartment and how we didn’t have room for anything. It really helped cut off the trinket-type gifts before she bought them, so there were no hard feelings. So, if you want to avoid hurt feelings, you could bring it up next summer/fall and talk about how you don’t have much space and you’re doing your best to keep the clutter under control. It might also help to ask for specific things you need or want, or to ask your mom to consider giving you consumable gifts – spices, food, candles, etc – where you can say you loved it so much you used it up.
I’m planning on posting a “this site swap” post Christmas. I have some ridiculously tacky necklaces from my birthday to re-home.
oil in houston
same problem with my mum, I try to call her on it, so she stops wasting her money. With my inlaws though, I can’t do it, so I shamelessly regift…. they give nice presents, just not my style, so I figured that if it can make other people happy, why not
i posted this super late last night, so I’m going to repost here.
I know a lot of us are cold in our offices (even here in CA, Brrr!!!). And I have been using a little $12 heating pad from walgreens. But I just found this yesterday and it looks even better! It is also designed to be worn over the shoulders like a shawl and has pockets!! This might be my pagan Winter Solstice present to myself ;o)
There are other colors available on different sites, too.
I think I need that.
Can someone please point me back to the last few threads with book suggestions? I like fantasy and new fiction and nonfiction. Thanks!
Have you read The Steel Remains and Kate Griffin’s Matthew Swift books? Those are my favorite new fantasies of the last five years.
If you like fantasy, I highly, highly recommend anything by Brandon Sanderson. He mostly writes epic fantasy, but he has a few YA and urban fantasy books that are great too. I also really enjoy Jim Butcher’s Dresden Files series for urban fantasy. The books definitely get better as they go along and he doesn’t let the characters get stuck in a repetitive status quo, which can sometimes happen with long series. The books can be really violent at times, especially in the first few, so you may want to skip them if this will bother you. If you want a fun YA fractured fairytales sort of series, I love Patricia C. Wrede’s Enchanted Forest Chronicles. The first book is called Dealing With Dragons. I first read it when I was 10 and I still re-read all the books at least once a year.
Gail the Goldfish
I agree with all of these. Brandon Sanderson is my favorite. Another YA-ish fantasy book that’s a favorite of mine and isn’t well known is Crown Duel by Sherwood Smith (originally two books, Crown Duel and Court Duel, it has since been republished as one)
Life after Life – Kate Atkinson
Extra special book.
Brain on Fire (NF)
Empty Mansions (NF)
The New Jim Crow (NF)
Red is my favorite color but I don’t think I could rock this much of it. I do love the pants though.
Any suggestions for infusing vodka? I’m trying to incorporate the last of the cranberries and use the vodka for [email protected] at a holiday party.
Better for cranberries would be a simple syrup. You’d be using sugar with cranberries anyway, and cranberry flavor is best once it’s heated. Careful to just barely dissolve the sugar, though, or you’ll end up with jelly!
Cranberry infused vodka is a staple in Russia. A quick google turned this up: http://cookfromrussia.livejournal.com/576.html
I also remember seeing something on Martha Stewart about this.
You can use the cranberries as a garnish by making sugared cranberries. An easy recipe is on Annie’s Eats.
The blog My Baking Addiction just did a post a few days ago on infused vodka to give as homemade gifts.
I heard a long discussion on NPR’s The Splendid Table where many interesting suggestions were made. It was a caller asking for ideas and the host gave 5 or 6 and instructions. The episodes are online and I am pretty sure it was within the last few weeks, maybe 2 weekends ago.
Thanks all. I guess I’ll be stopping by BB&B to get a big glass jar on the way home.
I used to make blueberry cordial (and I’m sure it could be done with cranberries) from vodka. It’s really easy but it takes longer than you have because it has to sit for two months. I also found that it was perfect by Christmas because it had to mellow even after you strained it. http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Blueberry-Cordial-200757
Yes! Christmas pudding flavoured vodka. It is delicious.
That looks amazing; I will have to try it next year. I went with simple syrup and chopped the cranberries in a food processor to speed up the absorbtion. Between the cranberry vodka and mulled wine, I think our guests will all be a bit tipsy!
Fashion question - boots
Can I wear these with skirts/dresses in a business casual setting?
I like the Duchess of Cambridge’s dress/coat/boots look very much, but I don’t wear high heels.
I’m not really worried about them being stumpifying (my body type veers in the opposite direction) but I’m more concerned about whether it would just be a serious mis-match or ridiculous looking.
I think those would look a bit odd with skirts and dresses because they’re in-between short and tall boots. Have you looked at tall flat boots like these? http://www.zappos.com/la-canadienne-passion-black-suede
I think a little frumpy. Not inappropriate but not especially fashionable.
I think they look fine, especially with black tights. I’ve seen plenty of women wearing similar boots.
I think it would look nice – elegant and professional. I just started wearing similar boots with work skirts and dresses. I looove these most-beautiful boots I have, which I usually wear with skinny pants or leggings, and one day on a whim I wore them to work. And we lived happily ever after. :) :)
What do you guys wear to hang around the house when it’s cold? When I’m just hanging out with the hubby, I’d still like to look at little nice – at least, not frumpy. In the summer, it’s easy – cute tank top and shorts or a casual sundress. In the winter, I tend towards fitted jeans or yoga pants and a sweater, but I’m still always freezing! (We keep the house at about 72, which seems high enough.) I’ve tried adding an undershirt under the sweater, and hose or tights under the pants, but I’m still cold, and wearing tights or hose sort of goes against my goal of comfort, plus I feel pretty dumpy in that many layers.
I was thinking fleece-lined yoga pants might be a thing, but my searches turned up nothing. (Shouldn’t that be a thing? Maybe I need to submit it to one of those Invention Submission Corporations as an “as seen on TV” product.) LL Bean makes fleece-lined jeans, but I’m worried that that sounds horribly unsexy. Using a blanket is fine, until I have to get up (so I’m far more lazy than I ought to be), and I’m not quite desperate enough for a snuggie.
I hate the winter.
I bought the skinny sweatpants at Jcrew – and totally thought I’d end up return them. But they were so snuggly once I put them on that I couldn’t. I double up on socks – regular cotton or thin smartwool socks with bigger raglan/wool socks over, or my shearling lined slippers. My feet are always cold. I have a couple of oversized sweaters that I’ll throw on over a longsleeve shirt (one at a time, of course, not both of the sweaters at the same time).
I have some Athleta fleece-lined yoga pants. They are SO comfy. I find they run a bit small, though.
Athleta has yoga pants in its “tech stretch” fabric, which is fleecy on the inside. I’ve got a skirt made out of the material, and it’s pretty close to what I think you’re looking for.
(Oops — I didn’t see Anita’s post before I answered. Sorry for the repeat!. :-))
Keep your feet and hands warm. Comfy socks, and sleeves that are long enough that you can pull them over your hands (I have a fleece that specifically has pockets on the sleeves that fold out to cover your hands, it’s heavenly). Sometimes when I’m really cold in the house, I just need to jump in a hot shower to warm up, though — especially if I am coming in from outside and it’s freezing.
Huge, awesome, fuzzy socks. Wearing absurd socks and slippers will keep you way warmer than more clothes, and since you’re at home, you don’t have to worry about looking professional, which is why I’m always cold at work.
Also consider a cute hat, which doesn’t need to be nearly as warm as one you’d wear outside, but which will keep you much, much warmer. If you match it to a big sweater, it looks like something out of a magazine instead of just that you’re cold.
As for lined jeans, cabela’s and gap make them as well, in cuter styles than LL Bean. They’re also great for keeping warm, and they’re about as sexy as normal, relaxed fit jeans.
+1 to huge awesome socks. I have a stocking slippers with snowflakes with giant, 3D panda heads on the toes. They are wonderful.
I have Lucy pants I got on sale that are as thick as sweatpants but look like yoga pants. And the key for me is Wool. I have thick, high wool socks, and the last few days I’ve still been keeping my smartwool long-underwear on under my yoga pants at home. Plus, an actual wool sweater to wear on top. I usually wear a comfy cotton tshirt with a wool cardigan over it.
Ha ha… thought I had you covered until I saw the looking nice part. For me – fleece top or enormous hoodie, leggings, fuzzy gripper socks (or I will fall down the stairs). If I have to go outside, I add my faux fur lined suede Skechers slippers.
i usually wear a pair of leggings with a longsleeve fitted white silk-y t-shirt (its silk long johns, which is super warm — i used to ski in these) and a big chunky sweater over the top. If im really cold, i add big, soft, comfy socks. Sometimes I go for a less-chunky sweater and add a colorful scarf tied like an infiniti scarf.
Under Armour sells yoga-ish pants in their cold gear (or at least they used to, because I won a pair). You won’t find “real” yoga pants lined with fleece because you’d sweat to death in them. You’ll have more luck looking at running clothes designed to be worn outside in cold weather. Victoria’s Secret leggings are also really thick and warm (the real leggings, not the foldover yoga pants). I bought them to exercise in, but they’re too thick for that.
If your hands get cold, I recommend fingerless gloves for inside. They keep most of your hand warm, but don’t impede your manual dexterity the way regular gloves would. (I’ve tried those!) I also wash my hands more frequently just to warm them up under the hot water. You can also layer leggings or skinny sweatpants under jeans, so long as your jeans aren’t skin-tight to begin with. I hate being cold, so I would wear a fuzzy robe over my regular clothes at home, but you could probably find a long cardigan that would do as well but be much cuter.
I wear fleece straight-leg pants (like sweats, but not as frumpy?) I also wear them over my leggings to crossfit in the early mornings. Or yoga pants, but they’re not as warm.
Typically the fleece pants or yoga pants & a hoodie with a t-shirt underneath. I wear socks & birkenstocks in the house, or if it’s really cold, my shearling slippers & socks.
I ALWAYS change my socks when I get home from work, even if I am wearing wool at work, I find that if I put on dry socks, I tend to get a little warmer.
It may be a little Jersey Shore, but I wear velour hoodies and pants like these http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?vid=1&pid=920272022
with tanks underneath. I’ll add socks if I’m still cold.
Well, if your husband can tolerate you turning the heat up a degree more or so, I’d try that route. That doesn’t really fly with my boyfriend though. Otherwise idk how much you can do besides jeans or yoga pants and a cozy sweater or cute sweatshirt (old navy has really cute crewneck sweatshirts for really cheap!!!). I’m always cold though, so I think you’d definitely need to invest in more than smartwool socks. I’m wearing these huge brown lined wool socks right now and they almost get the job done.
Lululemon’s fleece yoga pants are called “brushed,” so they’re there, but maybe not obvious.
I find that I stay much warmer if I keep my neck warm, so I often wear a comfy scarf in the winter even in the house.
It’s all about the scarf! Warm neck=warm self.
Fleece-lined leggings (I got mine at Walgreens for super-cheap and they are easily one of the best things I’ve ever purchased), cozy socks (the plush kind that are meant for wearing around the house), and something somewhat fitted, but warm. I have a fleece-lined track jacket (noticing a theme here?) that I like to wear around the house–it is warm, but doesn’t look like I’ve completely given up on life because it still has a shape.
Lyssa – we keep our house at 66-68, so 72 sounds balmy to me.
In the winter, I wear a long-sleeved t-shirt under an LLBean polartech half-zip on top. If it’s really cold, I’ll wear long underwear (Little Hotties from Costco) on top and on the bottom under my yoga pants or running pants. And if it’s arctic cold outside (last week it was 10 degrees here) I’ll wear a polartech zip-front bathrobe over everything. It’s like a snuggy but it lets me walk and type normally.
Ditto– we keep our house at 63!
Fleece lined running pants are def a thing. My friend showed me hers the other day, not sure on brand though.
Kat, you are slaying me with the commentary! Too funny.
i know, me too!! Love the holiday party story ;)
Has anyone tried JCrew’s darby loafers? I’m thinking about giving them a whirl because it’s 30% off right now. I’m also tempted to buy another pair of cece ballet flats because the studded ones look so perfect… not that i’ll wear anything besides boots from now until April
unfathomably uncomfortable. so sad because i love them, but seriously I wanted to cut my feet off.
Nurse just came in and was shocked that I was “still” working. At 4:30. I’ve run into a fair number of people who are surprised I’m working while on bed rest. I’m surprised anyone is surprised. Is it really just nbd for so many people to just stop work for weeks/months? I get not everyone has a job where telework is possible, but I would think in my situation having a job like that would be a disaster. My job offered to let me cut my hours, which I appreciate, but, um, no because that would be a cut in pay and (cross fingers, knock on wood) with two babies coming less money is the last thing we need. I just don’t believe that I’m the only woman whose income is crucial to her family’s financial survival. So, yeah, I’m going to be working my normal hours as long as all I’m doing is sitting in this bed. Sorry, just a little surprised rant there. (It’s like all those people who tell me I won’t possibly be able to go back to work full time with twins. Well, taking a year or two off to be home would be great, but I think we all — husband, me, kids — like things like eating and living in a house, so I’ll be back at work full time after my maternity leave.) Okay, really ending my rant now.
Plus, it seems like if you’re stuck in bed all day, work will at least give you a sense of accomplishment. There are few things more miserable than lying around with nothing to do for an extended period of time, feeling completely pointless.
Exactly, what else are you going to do all day?
I guess I never thought about what people do about work when they’re on bedrest. Insensitive of me! I just assumed most people have disability plans to cover some of their income. Personally, if it were me I’m sure I would rather be telecommuting too, rather than watching daytime TV and fretting.
Hug’s to you. You rest up so that the babie’s will be healthy and HAPPY! YAY!!
I am lookeing forward to the day when I will be haveing two babie’s, mabye one at a time tho, b/c I am NOT sure that my body can handel 2 at a time, tho I do have a littel of a POT BELLY, but I think that is b/c I eat to much.
I got a fruit basket from Sam — he want’s to date me still even tho he showed me his winkie, and that was not some thing I wanted to see. There was a lot of fruit in the basket that reminded me of that day and his winkie, and I laughed and told Lynn and Frank they could have the banana’s and the peache’s. So funny! I am leaveing the basket at work so that we can eat some thing OTHER then Crumb’s. My tuchus is so large that I am sureley going to have to start wearing YOGA PANT’S to work, even tho the manageing partner has forbidden us from wearing pant’s.
The janitor stopped by and he wants to go out with Lynn. I am not sure if Lynn want’s that b/c she is used to dealing with lawyer’s and investigator’s but I said why not? He seem’s like a nice guy and he was the one who fixed the toilet that Frank stuffed up so he IS very HANDY!
Lynn said she would think about it, but I am goieng to encourage her b/c she is not getting any younger (at 25 — with onley a high school diploma), and she needs to start haveing babie’s soon, like me. YAY!!!!!
Ellen, the thing to remember is that a LOT of men really like a large tuchus! Just dial 1-900 Mix-a-Lot and kick them nasty thoughts!
Also, Lynn should definitely go out with the janitor if he seems like a solid guy (and his job has benefits). Knowing how to fix a toilet is not a skill to be dismissed.
I think even many white collar professionals are not afforded the ability to telework so people are often surprised it is possible. I think many people also think that when we are physically unable to be at work we should be “resting up” and not hurting our pretty little brains.
Someone a long time ago posted that she was ordered to bed rest unexpectedly and was concerned about the work she had left unfinished. I asked if she could telework and her doctor had forbade it because they were trying to keep her blood pressure down.
I think, unfortunately, most people in your situation end up (a) using leave or (b) going broke or (c) relying on family/husband for money.
I’m in your shoes and like I posted to you before, teleworked while recovering from a minor surgery. It really was n/b/d and I would have gone nuts not working. When my husband got home at 5:30 I also got the “you are still working!” I reminded him that I normally work until 7 in the office so why would it be different from the couch?
I also think people can be amazed that some of us are paid to stare at computers ALL DAY.
And regarding keeping blood pressure down, I would have way more stress and higher blood pressure worrying about my unfinished work and languishing cases and the lack of income and bills and mortgage than I would just doing the minimum number of hours of computer work per day. I probably would have defied that docs orders if it were me.
Yeah. I needed a note from my doctor to confirm that it was okay. She asked if it wouldn’t be stressful for me. I said “you know what’s stressful? Not having any income.” She wrote my letter. I guess most women still aren’t the primary earners in their families? But I thought most households still relied on the woman’s income even if it was slightly less than the man’s. I also grew up in a single mom household, so it just never occurs to me that a woman’s income might be anything other than absolutely essential to survival.
I also think some of the questions stems from questioner bias. The opportunity to telework isn’t super common in many areas of medicine. An OB can’t catch a baby over Skype. So people don’t get that if the bulk of your job consists of sitting at a computer and talking on the phone, then well, you can do you job from most anywhere.
anon for this
YES, this is completely true. I’ve been unable to go into my office for the past few days due to weather issues, and it’s been extremely stressful not to be able to get work done that had to be done in the office. Stressful to the point where I wasn’t sleeping due to anxiety. I would much rather be able to do some work than have to sit and stew about it.
I think it’s great that you want to keep working and that your doctor okayed it for you. I am like you and in addition to the income issue I would go crazy not having my brain active. What I think stinks is that our business climate/laws don’t do more for women facing short-term disability while pregnant. I previously only worked in mega law firms and was used to the 18 weeks maternity (AND paternity and adoption leave) leave benefits offered by my firm. I was shocked and disgusted when I moved to a smaller firm of 300 (mind you they still have per partner profits upward of $2.2 million and multiple offices) and they had NO maternity leave. They actually still referred to it as disability leave (while I realize that the state calls it that, it’s not what most good corporate employers call it in their handbooks or how their HR department refers to it). The US is one of the worst countries in terms of parental leave. After reading about the new female CEO at GM and all the commentary about why there aren’t more women in the top roles, I want to shout — it’s obvious! Address the paycheck inequity that still exists here; make meaningful employer provided maternity benefits mandatory; make other types of parental leave available for parents adopting kids as well as paternity leave for fathers.
Sorry for hijacking your rant! I get that you want to work (and I likely would feel similarly). Getting off my soapbox now.
I’m getting similar commentary, though I guess it’s more understandable since I’m in CA now. We can get state-mandated disability starting at 4 weeks prior to due date (which I am as of today). Unless your employer tops it off, however, it’s only 55% of your pay up to a cap (which for most ppl with corporate jobs means it’s less than that). My employer, however, does top it off to full pay.
I probably will take the disability starting next week, and right now I’m sort of working half time (using sick leave for the other half). But no one seems to get that I actually want to finish up the projects I have…I dunno, I guess people think that once you’re gestating that defines you.
TBK – hang in there and rant all you wish.
According to recent news reports, in fully 40% of US families with kids under 18, the woman is the sole or primary breadwinner. You can count me in that group, and I would do the same thing that you are doing, in the absence of paid time-off pre- and post-delivery.
Just try to keep your stress as low as possible while working.
1. So sorry about that! I carry our family health insurance and bring home 60% of our monthly income. We’re totally fine for money while both working but we’d be in trouble if either of us had to stop working for a few months. I’m pregnant and will only be taking 8 weeks of leave because I only have 6 weeks of sick/vacation saved up and I don’t get maternity leave. I’d love to take 12 weeks but I don’t think our budget can handle me not getting paid for 6 weeks. If I end up on bed rest you bet I’ll be asking about telework options.
2. As to the haters, a friend/coworker very unexpectedly got pregnant with twins when her son was 9 months old. She was the primary breadwinner in her household so after her paid maternity leave was up she went right back to work and proceeded to continue kicking @$$ at work like she always had. Sure it was tiring and she had to deal with comments from jerk partners about “leaving her children” but it all worked out just fine.
What are your favourite Christmas movies?
I like A Muppet’s Christmas Carol the best, and Love Actually second best. I want to go on a Christmas movie binge this weekend…
YES Muppet’s Christmas Carol!! 100% FAVORITE. I think i love you ;)
I also have a queue of movies i like to watch every holiday-time.
The Holiday (Gumption!!!)
Scrooged (Bill Murray)
Bridget Jones Diary
totes random, but I like the weird combos ;o)
Anon in NYC
I love The Holiday! I also love Last Holiday with Queen Latifah (she learns she has a terminal illness and only 3 weeks to live so stops being so cautious and really just goes out to live her life to the fullest).
I also love love love It’s a Wonderful Life, and I feel like it’s only played once during the holiday season!
I have never watched A Christmas Story (which my in-laws tease me about all the time), but I have no interest in watching it.
I absolutely LOVE the movie “LOVE ACTUALLY” It is the BEST Movie and so Romantic. The guy’s are MEN and the women are pretty and everything is so HAPPY.
And the song’s are so great. My dad even get’s teery eyed with the singing and he is very UNEMOTIONAL. Mom like’s it too. Grandma Leyeh even sing’s the song….Everyone Says I love you….the dog in the kitchen and the kitty too…. the preacher too says I love you. YAY!!!!
Anyone in the HIVE that has NOT seen “LOVE ACTUALLY” should run right out and get the DVD! It is my alltime favorite. YAY!!!!
Umm… I agree with Ellen.
Now I feel so.weird.
I also love Christmas Vacation and The Holiday.
I SUPER agree with Ellen!! YAY!!
A muppt christmas carole is my all time favorite. And I gotta say I loved the article the other day explaining that Love actually is not only not a holiay movie, its also not romantic.
yeah, I didn’t want to be a grinch, but I agree, I don’t love Love, Actually, actually.
Article against Love Actually: http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2013/12/-em-love-actually-em-is-the-least-romantic-film-of-all-time/282091/
Article for Love Actually: http://www.motherjones.com/media/2013/12/why-love-actually-matters
The old Christmas Carol from sometime in the 1950s with Alistair Sim
Black Adder’s Christmas Carol
The original Miracle on 34th St
A Christmas Story
Muppet Christmas Carol
White Christmas (although as a child I never caught the racism in the “Minstrel” number in the middle — but hey the movie’s sexist as hell too, so oppression for all this Christmas!)
Emmett Otter’s Jugband Christmas (Jim Henson)
Die Hard and Lethal Weapon (the first of each take place during the holidays)
When Harry Met Sally
National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation
Then, of course Love, Actually and Bridget Jones.
Die Hard is my husband’s favorite Christmas movie! Watching it together has become a tradition in our house.
Yes!! I forgot Die Hard. Third that one. Die Hard 2 also takes place at Christmas, at Dulles Airport, which I am flying into on Christmas Day this year… I should totally watch that again ;o)
Mine too! It’s what I initially agreed to watch in exchange for him watching Love, Actually. Now we both love both.
Love Emmett Otter’s Jugband Christmas – particularly the outtakes.
The Year Without a Santa Claus, hands down. It has the Heat Miser and the Snow Miser.
And, It’s A Wonderful Life, but I only really like the first part of that up until his father dies…
Oh, and from way back… the Gift of the Magi as done by Bert and Ernie. Bert sells his paper clip collection to buy a soap dish for rubber ducky and Ernie sells rubber ducky to buy a cigar box for Bert’s paper clip collection.
This sounds awesome.
Love Actually, Christmas Vacation, The Holiday, Miracle on 34th Street. I love When Harry Met Sally but don’t really consider it a Christmas movie.
Another vote for Muppet Christmas Carol, and add the following:
– Home Alone
– White Christmas (this one makes me feel all snuggly and nostalgic)
– Nightmare Before Christmas (it’s also a Halloween movie!)
– and weirdly, I really like The Family Stone. I hated it at first because I thought the premise was ridiculous, but I ended up coming around. There are a few more in this category of weepy family movies: Stepmom and The Family Man.
Love Actually, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, and The Santa Clause. I’ve gotten two down, just need to watch The Santa Clause!
Charlie Brown’s Christmas
How the Grinch Stole Christmas
It’s a Wonderful Life
The Bishop’s Wife (with Cary Grant)
I have to watch each of these every Christmas.
My family has a tradition of watching martial arts movies on Christmas, so I have to say that my favorites are Drunken Master, Hero, Ninja Scroll, and Kung Fu Panda (shut up, it’s awesome).
Imagine the great joy that resounded in the Backson household when it was discovered that 47 Ronin in the 3d STARRING ONE MISTER KEANU REEVES was coming out on Christmas day.
In no partricular order:
A Christmas Carol (George C. Scott version)
It Happened on 5th Avenue
Charlie Brown Christmas
Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer
Home Alone (only the first one)
I obviously have a thing for Christmas movies.
And I forgot to add Miracle on 34th Street and It’s A Wonderful Life. Those just go without saying.
Oh yeah, Little Women!! I love the 1933 one with Katharine Hepburn, siggh!!
AND you reminded me: Meet Me in St. Louis!! yay, Judy Garland! ;o)
The Year without a Santa Claus
Charlie Brown Christmas
The Family Stone. I cannot stand SJP, but she’s so relate-able in this movie.
Another for The Holiday; Christmas Story (have a party at friends’ every year with Chinese carryout);
we’ll probably start a tradition with the boys to watch Home Alone on Christmas Eve or something…Hubs wants to watch it with the boys as a family.
Shoe/hose TJ: When I wear hose or tights, my shoes start slipping off. I am already using the heel grips for days without hose. They don’t work with the hose. Are the shoes just too big?
I don’t have any tips, but I have the same problem. I can wear a pair of heels barefoot and they fit perfectly, but the second I put on hose or tights I’m losing a shoe when walking up stairs. I wish I had the answer!
Could be a fit issue. Have you tried inserts at the balls of your feet? They can actually do more for foot slipping out issues than heel inserts, since they sort of push your feet back into the heel instead of relying on a heel insert to grip them.
(Former) Clueless Summer
Yep, just too big. I wear hose or tights or trouser socks pretty much every day, so I buy all work shoes smaller so they fit with hose. If you have shoes that need heel grips with bare feet, they’re likely too big and I find hose makes me able to wear a half size down.