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Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
I'm always a fan of wrap blouses (although I often supplement with a professional camisole beneath), and this bestseller from Sweet Pea looks full of promise, even for someone who generally hates beige clothing. I'd add a gold necklace, maybe an updo, and wear it with a nice pair of trousers or a pencil skirt. It's $78 at Bloomingdale's. Sweet Pea Wrap Top
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(L-2)
P.S. Happy Halloween!
Sales of note for 9.16.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 30% off wear-now styles
- J.Crew Factory – (ends 9/16 PM): 40% off everything + extra 70% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Extra 25% off all tops + markdowns
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Kate
Beautiful blouse!
Now for my threadjack: has anyone here ever done a master’s or Ph.D. program in Europe to save money/get a different type of experience? I’m thinking of finding a public policy/politics/government type of program and I just don’t want to pay the absurd tutition rates here in the U.S. I studied abroad in college and would love to return to Europe – if anyone has done this before and has an experience to share, I’m all ears!
Anonymous
I haven’t, but I’d consider whether getting the full benefit out of those degrees requires you to get them in the country you are studying (assuming your interest is to study the US). . . If you wanted to study the US outside the US, you might have trouble getting “full credit” for it.
buffybot
I didn’t do this, but my husband did — got a public policy-type masters in the UK. If you want to use that degree to enter the job market in the U.S., I’d think twice — it made recruiting and interviewing for relevant positions upon graduation even harder, since the channels aren’t there. And if you’re looking to use the degree to get a job in Europe, well, that’s also difficult because of visa issues and the general state of European economies…Also, while I’m sure it’s interesting from an academic perspective, it’s possible that a lot of the theory you might end up learning would not be particularly applicable here in the U.S. (coalition governments, for instance, and public choice models). And if it’s more practical rather than theoretical, you could end up learning A LOT about the political structure of the EU, which may or may not be useful to what you want to do in the future.
Also, I’d seriously investigate whether costs would end up being any cheaper (unless you are lucky enough to have EU or similar citizenship). Americans seem to typically pay full freight and then some, as foreign students. And then you have to consider in the cost of living, travel to and from, etc…
health care anon
I love your screen name and am slightly jealous I didn’t think about that myself. Buffy fans unite!
lia
I have a friend who did. He had a great experience but did not end up using the degree in his career.
Kate
Just for reference, the programs I would most likely consider have very minimal or no tuition, even for foreign students (I’m mostly looking in Germany). I have a few friends who have done this route and I’m going to talk to them for their opinions too, but most aren’t really established in their careers yet.
Frugal doc..
Yes, I did a Master’s in England (Oxford), but it was in the sciences (genetics). I had done a semester overseas in college and just loved it. So while I was applying for grad schools in the US too, I deferred for a year when I got into an overseas program.
What I would recommend is applying for fellowships. Consider a Fulbright, Rotary and search for every single scholarship out there. Contact your prior college and ask for advice from their overseas study office. Look for local small scholarships in you community. Don’t think they are impossible. If you have already traveled/studied overseas and have a strong “reason” for returning, you are already ahead of the game.
I had a fabulous experience, but also worked my butt off. Worked in the lab, had one on one tutorials with my professor, wrote a thesis, published multiple papers… but made sure I had time to socialize, participate in many clubs/activities I enjoy, travel, enjoy the student discounts for attending all the Arts in London (theater! symphony! opera!). I found that the American work/study ethic was stronger than the local work ethic among grad students. Yet, in my mind the Brits had a better balance of work/life.
But in this economy, I would also think hard about what you are to gain from the additional degree. For me, it added a lot to my CV, so it was worth it. But I still would have never done it if I had to pay out of pocket. Europe is very expensive right now as well. But perhaps you are older/more financially secure then I was at the time. I am a fan of doing experiences for knowledge/pleasure if you can afford them.
Good for you.
btw – the PPE degree at Oxford was very popular. Politics, philosophy and economics… I think.
ss
PPE was my undergrad degree. I am almost entirely certain that it doesn’t exist for post-grad when you’d be expected to get deeper in one of the 3 disciplines.
Frugal doc..
It was popular for American’s traveling to UK/Oxford to do PPE as a Master’s in 2 years (eg. Rhode scholars were often there for 2 years), although strictly speaking it was their undergraduate degree.
Degrees in the UK and probably most of Europe are more subspecialized and you only study that subject with the necessary complementary subjects. The tutorial system of teaching at Oxford can also be particularly rigorous. They actually “argue” that when they graduate with their undergraduate degree they have enough training to equal having a Master’s as well in the subject. So Oxford automatically GRANTS them a Master’s degree in addition to their bachelor’s degree, without taking any additional course work. I kid you not….
So if you ever see someone who graduated from Oxford with a BA and an MA in PPE… it means they did their undergraduate work there… but not an additional Master’s degree in PPE. Or if they are an American, they went and did PPE as a second degree, and just “took” the MA to put on their resume.
That’s how it worked when I was there.
ss
Oxbridge undergrads in all disciplines can upgrade their BAs to a ‘Masters’ degree without further work. It is an anomalous privilege for historical reasons, not because the tutorial system provides better or extra-rigourous training.
Frugal doc..
ok – chill…
I was giving my interpretation of how the students rationalized it to ME. Sure it is historical, but they (students) knew it was “misleading” when compared with an American Master’s degree. Relax…… ;)
ss
Sorry for any unintended tone ! It sounds like OP specifically needs a post-grad qualification in policy/ government and the Oxbridge PPE undergrad degree doesn’t get her there.
cbackson
It’s very important to see how the degree would be received in the US – even doctoral degrees from European institutions don’t always get the same “weight” in the US job market. It’ll depend in part on whether the research/writing burden required to get the degree is equivalent to what you’d have to do in the US.
In addition, you shouldn’t expect to be paying tuition for a reputable Ph.D program in the US (at least not in the social sciences or humanities, which is what I’m most familiar with).
Cb
True! It’d be hard for me to come back to the States with my UK doctorate, it’s rigorous and from a well respected uni but 3 years can’t compete with the marathon that is a US PhD in the social sciences.
Anon
Or in the hard sciences. My SO is getting his PhD and it is fully-funded, he’ll finish with zero debt.
Cb
Yep! I did my MA in Eastern Europe and am doing a PhD in polisci the UK. However, I’m planning to stay here which does make a difference. If you’d like to discuss further, post an anon email and I’ll drop you a line.
amelia earhart
Cb, I’m looking at moving to the UK for an advanced degree. Could you possibly email me at satrathnona@gmail.com?
Thank you!
Anonymous
The Graduate Institute of International and Development Studies in Geneva is well-respected and will be marketable worldwide. I know several people who did their master’s there.
Cb
I second this! Switzerland seems to be a bit easier for Americans to find work in than the EU if you’re thinking about staying.
Socksberg
I got a MA from Australia, which has not hindered my getting a good job in the US. In fact, a lot of interviewers said they brought me in specifically because they were interested in hearing more about my experience, and that got my foot in the door at places that I don’t know if I would be considered at otherwise.
Kate
Thank you, ladies – this is all very helpful! FWIW, I’m open to living abroad in the long term and don’t have any pressing desire to purchase property or anything here. If I could find a job or an internship through a program abroad, I think it would be an even richer experience overall, but I’d also like the option of returning to the U.S. with some decent job prospects ahead of me.
TravelMoreRoads
Happy Halloween everyone! In honor of the holiday, I posted orange travel items on my site, Happy Halloween wishes on Twitter, and am wearing office-appropriate black and orange. Hope everyone has a great day!
Alice
Blouse-related TJ: Aritzia or Everlane?
I am sorely in need of 1-2 good quality silk blouses, and trust the recommendations of Aritizia and Everlane from the ladies on this site. Does anyone have insights into the different fits of the two? I am short of arm and my frame is neither crazily hippy nor crazily straight. And I am emphatically not large of chest.
Thanks!
Anon
Everlane fits a bit blousy / boxy – I love it and sounds like it would work well for you, but they are not form fitting if that is what you are looking for.
Katie
I just returned my everlane silk blouse. It made me look like I was drowning in silk. I’m petite and found that the sleeves were 2-3″too long, and the bust area much too wide.
TO Lawyer
It sounds like you may have a similar body type to me and I love the aritzia blouses. My problem with other blouses is that they are too boxy on me (but I haven’t tried everlane). Aritzia blouses (the bergen) are not slim-cut on me but also not too boxy when I tuck it in to a skirt.
New Atty
We are in the same boat, Alice. I’m also on the hunt for a good silk blouse. I prefer white/ivory ones. Those of you who recommended, can you speak to how opaque or see-through the white silk blouses are?
anonosaurus
Hi all,
Thank you again to the many commenters who chimed in with advice and support yesterday. I can’t tell you how comforting it felt to have this community as a resource.
Yesterday was emotionally exhausting but also really clarifying; I feel as though I have a much better handle on what I want from this relationship and what I’m willing to give up.
I’m very happy to report that my partner did wind up going to see the counselor after all. We both feel cautiously optimistic about how things will proceed from here. He understands that I am also newly aware of how deeply hurt I have felt by the inertia thus far, and I feel much more able to avoid being sucked down into the love-despair-endless support cycle should things go south again.
So. Onward. Upward, even.
Thank you all.
Famouscait
So glad to hear it. What I didn’t want to mention yesterday (in case it wasn’t true for you) is that I always had my darkest moments of despair/I can’t do this anymore/losing hope…. right before a turning point where things started to gain traction. I don’t know if me reaching my own breaking point is a catalyst for this, or if I’m somehow attuned to have just as much stamina as I need, but it’s always worked out this way. Depression is a 2-steps-forward, 1-step-back dance, so be prepared for some regression. But it sounds like you’re both on your way towards healthy, and that is a wonderful thing. Take care.
Diana Barry
+1!
NOLA
I didn’t comment yesterday because I have no experience with this, but so glad to hear that you’re feeling optimistic and getting help.
ss
There are also lots of us who didn’t chip in in the absence of relevant advice but who hoped things would work out and are so glad to hear this happier report. Your partner is very very lucky to have you.
anonosaurus
Thanks, friends.
Senior Attorney
Thank you so much for updating. So happy you are feeling better about things. Big, big hugs to you. And we’re always here if you need us!
Ashley
High Five!
Wildkitten
+1 The world needs more high fives.
KC
Happy Halloween to the Hive! Morning TJ: What candy/treat are you most looking forward to today?
For me, it’s definitely candy corn. I can’t eat more than a handful, but always crave it on Halloween. That and caramel apples :)
Statutesq
Tie between Dots and Mellowcream pumpkins. I had both for breakfast this morning.
TBK
I love the pumpkins!
Cb
I’m having horrible peanut butter cup cravings, made worse that I’m sitting in my snackless office in a country that has never heard of them.
Killer Kitten Heels
Pumpkin-shaped Reese’s. The peanut-butter-to-chocolate ratio is vastly superior to the regular peanut butter cups.
a.k.
+1
Miss Behaved
Oh, man. You suck. I totally forgot about those. I’d been craving candy corn until now.
anon-oh-no
+1000
KC
How did I forget about those? I need to head to CVS, stat.
Killer Kitten Heels
Wait until tomorrow when they’re 50% off. (That’s my plan, anyway!)
Bonnie
Almond Joy and Reese’s Cups. I’m proud of myself for not tearing into the Halloween candy all week.
Nonny
Bonnie, you and I have exactly the same taste in candy.
Although I like Mounds too.
bananagram
I used coconut oil as a moisterizer for a while. I had to give it up because the smell made me crave Mounds, regardless of time of day and what I had already eaten.
Bonnie
Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.
Anon
Has anyone gotten a diamond engagement ring from Brilliant Earth? I see the ads on here all the time and on face, it seems like a legitimate and good company for people who want ethically sourced diamonds, but of course it helps to hear other people’s reviews and opinions. TIA!
rosie
I have a diamond pendant from Brilliant Earth and am quite pleased with it.
Other ideas–
My diamond ring is from a local jeweler’s estate/vintage case. My wedding band (plain platinum) is from the website Green Karat.
DC Darling
If you’re in the market for a diamond engagement ring I strongly recommend you check out pricescope.com It’s a jewelry forum with a ton of information, resources, and knowledgeable posters. They would be better equipped to address this question and provide some good information on ethically sourced diamonds.
yes
yes – love
NOLA
Complete Halloween fail. I was in a hurry getting dressed, even watching Mike & Mike dressed up as Duck Dynasty, and never thought to put on my Halloween outfit (black tunic dress and leggings, black pumps, skeleton earrings with rhinestone eyes, Halloween bracelet). I was at the car with no time to change when I thought of it. Oh well. Better luck next year.
AMB
To follow up on NOLA’s missed outfit, are people dressed up today?
I’m kind of in a Halloween outfit, black and cream tweed trousers, black byfriend blazer and a cream shirt with a bee on it to go with the bee headband I made for last weekend’s costume.
One of my (male) co-workers is dressed as a My Little Pony. It’s pretty awesome.
Anon
Is he into brony con? (Don’t Google it at work.)
Anon_00
I was wondering the same thing! Trying to think of the best way to say this – but a brony is an adult male who has a fetish for My Little Pony. There is even a Brony Con convention.
TBK
I’m not sure all bronies have a fetish in the s*xual sense (although I’m sure many do). I think some just like My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. (Although why, I don’t know.)
AMB
He is definitely a brony, has told me all about it.
AMB
And yes its just that he likes the show. Supposedly the writing is excellent. I don’t think bronies necessarily are into the k*nky stuff.
PinkKeyboard
Wearing a black sheath dress with ears and a tail.. cat!
Senior Attorney
I tell this story every year, I think, but one year I was in criminal court on November 1 and a young lady came in, in custody, to be arraigned on a DUI, still wearing her kitty costume complete with drawn-on “whiskers.” I have seldom felt so sorry for anybody in my life.
Silvercurls (who at least can laugh at herself when she gets on her soapbox)
Warning: The following comment was created while I was channeling a combination of Eeyore and Carrie Nation. No offense taken if you want to skip this for the next light-hearted Halloween comment.
Oy vey and vicarious heartache (for the young lady), but I also hope the experience steered her into never. driving. under. the. influence. again. The death & damage caused by drunk driving is especially sickening because the chain of events could have been completely avoided if only, if only, if only…! If she gets off with merely a searingly humiliating experience (but neither killing nor disabling herself or anyone else) she’s fortunate.
Meh
All-black regular office wear I’ve worn a hundred times, plus cat ears, a tad more eyeliner than usual and an eyeliner triangle on my nose. People are wigging out (in a good way) over how brilliant my costume is. I did go the extra mile and put up a selfied “lost cat” flyer in the kitchenette.
lucy stone
I’m wearing a sparkly black headband, grey/orange/black argyle sweater, black dress, and boots. I wanted to dress up more but I have court today. I am pondering sneaking in early in robes to get a laugh out of our judge.
Carine
I don’t usually dress for holidays, but deciding to wear orange and black made it much easier to get out of the door this morning! I’m wearing an orange sheath dress, black cardigan, and black shoes, plus a leeetle bit of black eyeliner that I don’t usually wear. I’ve already gotten “Oh thank goodness I wasn’t the only one!” comments from two other (higher-up) women, so that’s kind of fun.
Ashley
Not dressed up (YAY!), but several people are. Nothing crazy (big surprise there), but I am actively hiding in my office to keep the peace. There is usually someone mostly undressed and I don’t do poker face very well.
Calibrachoa
Not today, because our generous overlords have decreed that tomorrow is the dress-up day because it’s gonna be a casual day anyway.
If I can be bothered, I will whip up anb Evil Minion costume, although it would require dyeing my hair purple…
KC
I’m a minion today! (Regular, not evil, though.) You should do it!
Calibrachoa
Oh fine, twist my arm ;)
Joanieanon
My team is dressed up as Mad Men, so I’m in a fitted forest sheath dress, a pen necklace, a starburst broach, seamed stockings, and a beehive hairdo. We also all have rocks glasses (with iced tea in them) and smokes on our desks. We’re the Manhattan team, so we thought it was appropriate. This hair took FOREVER.
Carine
Your outfit sounds perfect! Did you use a tutorial for your hair that you can recommend? I feel like that’s something I should know how to do…just in case. And because it’s awesome.
Anon
Not in costume now, but when I take the kiddos out later I’ll be Rosie the Riveter. I am pumped: I’ll be fully covered ( =not freezing), power women nod, plus historically-minded (I’m a history nerd at heart). Eating candy corns as I write this, too,
AlaskaLaw
Navy suit, black pumps, witch hat. My boss said it was a good look for me.
EB0220
I had a major kid halloween fail last night. I had to iron something (with words) on a shirt for my daughter’s costume. Of course, I forgot to flip the image before printing so the words were backwards when I ironed it on! I managed to scrape off the bad part and redo it – looked kind of bad but better than backwards letters. And she’s only 1.5 so she doesn’t care. Still felt silly. Guess I shouldn’t have waited until the last minute!
Senior Attorney
I’m wearing ivory ankle pants with black windowpane checks, black blouse, black ponte knit moto jacket, ORANGE SHOES and jack-o’-lantern dangly earrings.
And the thing that feels the most daring is the ankle pants — first time I’ve worn them to the office and I feel very Rebel Rebel!
Ashley
I thought about wearing my sparkly black high tops and calling that my costume. But then I thought, meh. I would feel very conspicuous.
Miss Behaved
I’m as halloween as I get – leopard print Land’s End dress, paired with black suede wedge booties and a black cashmere cardi (I look really cute!). I might draw on whiskers with an eyebrow pencil when I see my nephew later. Since I’m allergic to cats, it’s the closest I’ll ever get to a cat.
And, Senior Attorney, my dad has a funny story about getting arrested with his buddies for attacking his own car, being arraigned the next day dressed as a bandit with eyebrow pencil on his face for scruff and being last for his first data (blind date!) with my mom. The full story is hilarious!
Miss Behaved
uh oh. typo. “late for his first data”. Can you tell I work with data?
Miss Behaved
Grr. Arrgh. “late for his first date”
Susie
I’m not in costume but am wearing black and orange – orange shirt, black skirt, black cropped cardigan, black shoes. I’m also made a few change to my usual look – hair curled instead of straight, contacts instead of glasses (first time I’ve ever not worn my glasses to work) and slightly more makeup.
Nonny
I’m not in costume, but had a dentist appointment this morning and my dentist was wearing a green dinosaur head. Not a hat, a full head with his face in the mouth. It was fantastic.
Anon
Dressed as a Red Sox fan! I didn’t have a costume so I figured I’d seize the opportunity to celebrate and to wear a baseball cap, tee, and sweatshirt to my biz casual office.
zora
The extent of halloween for me I guess is that I painted my nails black this week. I didn’t even think about Halloween, just did it randomly. Which was weird because I never do my nails, this is like the 4th time ever in my life, and i just had this urge. So, that’s my halloween costume I guess.
So, I’ll have black rocker chick nails while I hide from trick or treaters in my dark house tonight.. I know, I am so bah humbug ;oP
Kanye East
I’m a sexy lawyer. I look the same.
Weekly routines
I was totally fascinated by yesterday’s discussion on daily routines. Now I am curious about weekly routines. What do you all do every week/weekend to make the week go smoothly? I am hoping to automate life a little bit more and make lists that I can actually commit to completing so when I find myself with a free hour I don’t feel like I need to to EVERYTHING and then end up doing nothing because it’s so paralyzing. Like, Saturdays – vaccuum. Sundays – grocery shop and pre-chop produce for the week, make one slow-cooker meal. Do others have great tips for this?
NOLA
I have absolutely no magic bullet in this area and it’s hard to adjust when I have other plans, but on Saturdays, I run my errands and get groceries. I keep a running list for both all week in a little notebook. On Friday night, I take my notebook upstairs so I can think again about everything I need to do. I also strip my bed on Friday night and take the laundry basket downstairs so I can throw sheets and cleaning cloths, etc. in the laundry first thing on Saturday morning. I get gas first thing on Saturday, then Target and groceries, or other errands. I go to the gym on Saturdays pretty religiously, although this week may not be possible because I have rehearsal at noon and a student play at 7:30.
On Sunday, I have church but I get up fairly early to get things done and ease into my day. I start laundry (clothes) as soon as I get up and throw my towels in the wash after I shower. I also clear out the bathroom so I can mop while the towels and rug are out. I sometimes clean the bathroom as I get ready. I try to do a lot of my upstairs cleaning (bedrooms, bathroom), while I’m watching football, then I’ll do cooking and downstairs cleaning, finish laundry, clean up the kitchen from cooking, exercise, do my nails (purposely at the end of the day on Sunday after I finish cleaning and cooking).
NOLA
I should point out that part of the reason I consolidate errands to Saturdays is that both my grocery store and Target and other places I regularly frequent for errants are in the burbs and not easy for me to get to during the week. So YMMV if you can do these things on the way home from work.
TBK
This will surprise no one who’s a regular reader of this site, but I make a schedule for my weekend. Saturday morning, I make a list of everything I want to accomplish over the weekend. Then I estimate how long each task will take, and then I make a schedule. Sometimes when I add it all up, I realize I have 12 hrs worth of stuff I want to accomplish on Saturday and another 15 hrs on Sunday. Obviously that will just result in failure, so that gives me a chance to go back and pare it down to something manageable. (Lately I’ve been adding in “rest” between, say, grocery shopping and starting a freezeable meal for the week. Mostly because the TBKlets are sapping some of my energy, but also I’ve realized it makes me more productive overall.)
As for what I need to do to be ready for the week, the big one is grocery shopping. Sometimes we just don’t have time (or get lazy) and it just throws off the whole week. Also, prepping food for the week and planning meals. The other one is making sure I have my clothes all set. Our cleaning lady does laundry, but lately she started putting the clothes away, too, and her idea of what goes where can be a little bizarre, so I want to make sure I’ve tracked down everything for the week so I’m not frantically searching for a pair of tights when I’m already late for work.
Woods-comma-Elle
I am terrible at this – if I have a busy weekend, nothing gets done.
I generally try to do my grocery shopping on a Friday, rather than Saturday (if I can) because the supermarket is quiet and on a Saturday it’s like a zoo. I don’t currently have a cleaner as I recently moved, but I only have a little studio so I try to do the cleaning on Friday as well to get it out of the way. I have a standing Skype date with my parents which is either Saturday or Sunday depending on our respective plans. I have recently started (though this is a bit hit and miss so far) ironing and setting out my outfits for work for the week as I found that I always end up wearing the same stuff because I can never be bothered to or have time in the mornings to iron!
Beyond that, any kind of life admin gets done as and when depending on how busy my social life is!
Woods-comma-Elle
Also, I meant to say that online grocery shopping/deliveries can save so much time and money because you know exactly how much you are spending! I do it less now because I live alone and am hardly ever home to cook during the week, so it isn’t worth the delivery charge, but worth considering if you have more than one mouth to feed!
Cb
I feel a bit ridiculous doing it for the two of us but Waitrose delivery improves my quality of life. It forces me to plan and is actually good for the budget since I don’t toddle around the store throwing random things in my basket.
Introvert
As an introvert, I hate having weekends that are overscheduled. I always need a lot of downtime and prefer to have at least one full day with nothing scheduled so I can feel free to get groceries, ride my bike, hang out with the boyfriend, etc. with nothing else in the way. My preferred weekend schedule is nothing on Friday nights (pizza and TV at home is just the best then), plan any family visits or obligations for Saturday during the day, meet up with close friends on Saturday night, and run local errands/relax on Sunday.
In an ideal world, I’d cook a stew or do salad food prep for the week on Sundays, but it just doesn’t happen a fair amount of the time…
Sparrow
I’m the same way. I love to come home on Friday nights, change into my PJs and catch up on shows from my DVR. My husband will sometimes go out to the local bar with friends and I love having the house to myself.
There are some Saturdays where I will spend the entire day at home. On Sundays we go to church, so that is my day to get dressed and out of the house.
My ideal Sunday night is to have all the chores done so I can watch some TV – Homeland, True Blood, Game of Thrones – depending on the time of year.
Woods-comma-Elle
Yeah, for the record (which may have not come across from my post), it’s not so much that I want the errands done on Friday because I have so many plans at the weekend, it’s more that I want them done so I can watch ANTM and Hart of Dixie in my PJs.
I usually want to have at least one of the two days when I have no plans, if I have plans on both Saturday and Sunday I feel like I don’t get to relax!
Em
Y’all are girls after my own heart. I was thinking I might spend Saturday making some serious headway on Hart of Dixie season 2.
Purplepear99
Wrap tops are actually quite “in” right now. I’m seeing them everywhere lately and Nordies had a whole “trend” section on their website for them.
Sparrow
I was just thinking about this today. Here are some of my ideas. I hope to implement these soon in my life. It’s just me and my husband and our cats. No kids, so our schedule is not as busy. Also, we are able to carpool so we’re both home at the same times which helps with splitting up chores, etc.
1. Make breakfast in advance. I already make a big pot of steel cut oats on Sunday and my husband and I will heat up individual servings during the week. I would like to add some variety, so I was thinking of making a frittata or a big batch of pancakes.
2. Pack salads for lunch in advance so all I have to do is grab the container in the morning. Ideally I would like to include healthy snacks for the day like yogurt or fruit.
3. Meal planning. This past week I didn’t get around to it and we’ve ended up getting takeout. I like to plan meals for a week (like Sun-Sat) and then go grocery shopping on one day – either Saturday or Sunday. I hate making multiple trips to the store during the week, so I’ll try and hit multiple places at once. I
4. Cleaning. I prefer to do this all at one time instead of spreading it across multiple days. I vacuum everywhere and clean the kitchen floors. I also clean the bathrooms. This takes a couple of hours, but once I’m done I don’t have to worry about it until next week.
5. Laundry is usually done on Saturday or Sunday. I can still relax and read a book or watch TV inbetween switching loads and folding clothes.
Diana Barry
I try to
(1) go grocery shopping so we have enough food for the week;
(2) do all the laundry and FOLD IT and PUT IT AWAY so we have clothes to wear; and
(3) keep the kids from getting the house too messy.
All with varying degrees of success. We have a cleaning person so I don’t clean, but I do try to run the vacuum around if the kids get too much food on the floor.
Wildkitten
I have zero kids (two fur babies though) and if I don’t spend the whole weekend preparing for the week my whole week gets screwed up. I go grocery shopping, do laundry, and prep breakfast for the week.
Anonymous
I clean on saturdays if I’m home. Sometimes I’m at the boyfriends or out of town for the weekend. I do everything at once (vaccuum, dust, bathrooms, kitchen) instead of throughout the week. I tidy up every night during the week. I can’t relax unless my place is tidy and cleaning gives me a big relief.
If I’m home I’ll do the farmers market on sunday morning to buy my produce and then go to the grocery store for meat/canned goods/processed food. I do a crockpot meal/big meal on sundays so I can have leftovers for the beginning of the week. If I’m ambitious I’ll make steel cut oats on sunday night and portion out for breakfast (but I’m fine eating cereal or getting oatmeal at work).
RR
Mine is more of a monthly weekend cycle:
I go to Target once a month–usually second Saturday of the month. So I accumulate a list throughout the month. For us, that trip is mainly for kid and household things, so a month of diapers, formula, wipes, baby food (not quite to baby food yet), any clothing needs for the kids (tends to be more frequent for growing infant than my 5 year olds), needs for school for the month (if I know they are having some celebration or spirit week or something), any cleaning supplies, health and beauty needs, etc.
Other errands aside from grocery (haircuts for son/husband, dry cleaning, car washes, other random stops) are the same day. We head out in the morning, do all our errands with kids in tow, then have lunch out.
I meal plan and go the grocery every two weeks on Saturday morning. It means we are relying more on frozen fruits and veggies week two, but I’m okay with that to save a trip every other week. I plan for meals with no meat or easily frozen or purchased frozen meat for week two. If we didn’t meal plan on weekends, we’d end up with takeout or cereal for dinner every night. I plan quick, simple meals for the week nights and more involved meals for the weekends. Sometimes I plan for leftovers and sometimes not.
I do laundry on Sunday afternoons while hubs and the older kids watch TV (eventually this will be during afternoon nap for baby–baby is two months old so she hangs out with daddy and kids and sleeps as she wishes). I try to get clothes put away on Sundays too, although kids’ and baby’s clothes are usually put away while husband reads to them or bathes them at bedtime. Otherwise, Sunday afternoons are lazy family time. TV, games, reading, playing.
Cleaning is Saturday afternoons. We are bad at it, and the house is perpetually more cluttered than I want, but I’m trying to be zen about it. At five, my twins are just starting to be really useful in helping, so we are working on them being a part of the cleaning team instead of just destroying things as I clean.
ohc
I also do most of the weekly house maintenance stuff and cleaning on the weekends–usually on Saturdays. (Live-in boyfriend is in the adjustment phase of working sixty- or seventy-hour weeks, and he’s jam-packed on Saturdays and Sundays. I’m hoping that as he settles into the new schedule, he’ll be more able to help out with a little bit of the house stuff on his days off.)
Saturday is also the farmers’ market, which is where we get all our produce and our eggs. (Year-round! Woo.) I am trying to get into a routine of cooking a lot of components over the weekend–sometimes I succeed, sometimes I don’t.
I try not to plan to do anything besides cook a big batch of something on Sundays, because I am at church in the mornings and early afternoon–I’m on the board and in the choir, so it’s a regular commitment–and have a standing videochat date with my mother and sister on Sunday evenings.
I really love my productive weekends, but as the weather has started changing, I really wish I had more opportunities to just curl up on the couch with a book and a cat. Stinkin’ responsibilities.
Stephanie
I do meal planning on Saturday or Sunday morning, then do a ton of grocery shopping Sunday morning. We always cook Sunday through Thursday, then go out on Friday and Saturday. Cleaning is done by the cleaning lady on Mondays, but we do a load of laundry before she comes on Sunday so there’s not as much for her, and one of us does laundry on Fridays (we both have every other Friday off so someone is home). We try to run the dishwasher every morning– that way our afterschool babysitter will unload it. I declutter mostly on Sundays, but probably a little every day too– this mainly consists of telling the kids to put away the crap on the counter. We make school lunches at night after dinner.
Bonnie
I’m up by 7:30 on the weekdends and can never fall back asleep so on Saturdays, I get up, make coffee and watch some shows I recorded over the week while doing laundry. On Sundays, I go for a run and tackle the grocery store before our football team plays. We have a house cleaner so most of the straightening up happens the night before she comes but I try not to waste trips up and down stairs so always carry something with me, e.g. laundry. We do straighten up the kitchen every night, usually while preparing dinner.
Miz Swizz
Friday night is takeout and pjs by 5:30.
Saturdays I wake up around 7:30/8, go get breakfast with my husband and run errands. Errands are usually library, recycling, groceries. I plan our weekly meals from Saturday-Friday because we go shopping on Saturday. I put in a load of laundry before we leave so I can swap it out when we get home. I have a running task list on my phone where I add groceries so I can add items throughout the week. Saturday afternoons we usually goof off and I’ll try to run another load or two if we’re home but I don’t stress too much about it.
Sundays either we make breakfast or go out again. I started making a pan of baked oatmeal and a quiche on Sunday for our weekday breakfasts. That necessitates cleaning the kitchen before and after. With it being football season, I plan on watching the games and doing more laundry.
Add in a monthly CostCo run, a monthly Target run and a monthly Trader Joe’s/Whole Foods run and that’s a quick view of our weekend ritual. Some weekends we’re busy so it’s just groceries and bare minimum laundry, others we have nothing so all the laundry gets done and those are the weekends I clean the bathrooms, sweep floors, etc. I put the monthly runs on my calendar so I know when we’re going to different areas of town and can plan any other errands in that area.
Divaliscious11
Chores, errands etc… on Saturday. I need one day of peace…. that is my Sunday….
Diana Barry
Hey ladies,
I saw the thread yesterday about biglaw and about schedules and thought I would respond with a few notes on my experience:
– I was most happy in biglaw when I was busy and could be efficient, least happy when there was not enough work and I had to stretch things out.
– I am in a niche practice area, no emergencies, low conflict (I don’t like conflict), very steady schedule. So I was able to work 630 am – 5 pm every day. I am a lark and at my best in the morning so that was great.
– One poster mentioned assume that most of the women leave voluntarily before making partner. This is NOT SO, at least in the two biglaw firms where I worked. Most of the women who ‘left’ were pushed out, and an extremely high percentage of those were pregnant/just back from maternity leave/part-time.
Also, on schedules. I practice in small law and have 3 kids. Husband works more hours than I do, but from home. I am the one to “lean out” if one of us is, since I make significantly less than he does. Side note – when I worked in biglaw I made more.
– 615 up with baby to nurse
– 630-815 or 830 – feed kids breakfast, pack lunches, dress kids, get kid #1 and #3 out the door with the nanny, drive kid #2 to preschool
830-900 – drive to work
900-430 work
430-500 drive home
500-530 make dinner
530-700 dinner with kids, play with kids, put baby to bed
730 start putting other kids to bed
830 kids finally mostly quiet. Watch TV and/or do work.
1000 bedtime
Notes – I don’t work out, except on the weekend when I go walking with the kids, and one day a week when I work from home. Husband does not help with kids in the morning since he has a late-shifted schedule. When I finally get caught up on sleep from the baby, etc., I should start getting up at 5 so I can work out.
Ellen
Great Blouse, Cat? but if I buy it I would HAVE to wear a cami at work b/c of Frank. He is FOREVER stareing at me and without a cami, he would be comeing over and offering me coffee and cookie’s and stareing over my shoulder — FOOEY on that! He has a wife and she has breast’s, so I do NOT know why he is so focussed on mine. Plus, he is stareing at the INTERENET all day and I would NOT even want to find out what websight’s he is lookeing at from his desk. DOUBEL FOOEY!
As for the OP, wow, you are SO organized! YAY!!! But my job is to unpredeictible to tell what I am goeing to be up to hour by hour. All I do know is that I get up, walk to work on my fitbit, get in, usueally by 9 (UNLESS I have to be in court), eat lunch at around noon and go out mabye to Lord & Taylor’s or Macy’s, work STRAIGHT thru until mabye 5530 or 6, then leave and do NON-WORK STUFF. Of course, when I have alot of special project’s, I sometime’s have to stay until mabye 7 and once or twice 8 at night. The manageing partner get’s me a limo b/c he does NOT like me takeing the subway uptown at night with all of the wierdo’s floating around on the 4 and 6 train’s. Dad made him agree to this FORMALY as part of my partnership deal, tho he was sending limo’s for me for the last 3 year’s anyway. But even some of those driver’s are kind of skeevey, and they spend alot of time lookeing at me in their REAR view mirror’s instead of watching the ROAD. They say it’s easy to just drive up Park Avenue, but some are SLOPPY and also eat falafel’s and other smelley things in the car when they drive. They even ask me if I want a FALAFEL and I say no thank you. FOOEY!
Ed called to say Rosa was NOT feeleing well and would I like to come up this weekend and baby sit the kid’s with them. I think I might do it. He said the leave’s are a little past PEEK, but I should get up there b/c he also has a guy, Fred, who want’s to meet me. Fred is in RETAIL up there. I do NOT know what that mean’s but mabye he can get me designer dresses that are better then Lord and Taylor’s. He is onley 30, so I do not think he can be running thing’s b/c it is a family busness. We shall see if I go. I will ask Myrna if she want’s to come. YAY!
Fiona
Poll: Is a wrapped garment with a cami underneath a timeless look?
I can’t help but feel like this is how I used to dress 8 years ago and question whether it’s still a good idea.
Anon
Quite dated, IMHO. It looks very 8-10 years ago to me as well.
espresso bean
What do you mean by wrapped garment? Like a wrap top? Or a shawl?
Fiona
I meant a shirt like the one posted or a wrap-style dress (think DVF).
Anonymous
I think it’s dated as well. I never see anyone around my office (which is pretty large) wear wrapped tops.
Aggie
Wrapped top – I see as dated. Wrap dresses, however, are a timeless staple to any wardrobe.
Dulcinea
I am not sure, I think it might be. I recently re-watched all the episodes of West Wing and I noticed CJ Cregg nearly ALWAYS wore a button front blouse partially open with a cami underneath and I started to wonder about the look; it seems a little casual to me at least with the button up. I think it lokos less casual with a surplice or wrap top but I think it also harkens back to the layering trend which seems to have died down quite a bit, so…I am leaning towards “dated” as well.
Bonnie
Wrap dresses yes but wrap tops not as much. I don’t think they’re dated; they’re just not as classic as wrap dresses. Even DVF has really stopped making wrap tops.
Blair Waldorf
I’ve never thought of that. I don’t think either are dated. I guess if the camisole was a main component of the outfit it might look dated, but I assumed the camisole would be under the shirt and not showing. I don’t think today’s shirt is dated at all, and I don’t think wrap dresses are dated either.
Anne Shirley
Good diet/weight loss books anyone? Looking for something motivating to read on the commute. Less interested in specific plans, more interested in personal stories/memoirs.
Frugal doc..
Any knee-high boot suggestions for those with narrow calves?
I stopped in DSW yesterday and everything I tried on looked huge… Bad luck?
I would love a black leather boot. Since I live in Chicago, would prefer one that would hold up in winter weather, and I would love it even more if it was professional and comfortable enough that I could wear it to work/all day. I am on my feet a lot. No narrow/spike or high heels. Either a slight chunky heel or a wedge or flat. No buckles, no tassles.
I’ve never tried Aquatalia, but saw it suggested here recently. Do they run small or big in the calf?
Frugal doc..
oops. Sorry for posting in the wrong place. Ugh.
Pink
I love Aquatalia. They are 100% worth the money to me. I have 3 pairs of boots (2 with a heel, 1 flat) that have lasted about 8 years of Boston winters looking nice. They run huge. I’m a size 42 in heels in many of the high end designer shoes, but I take a 10 in Aquatalia. I find the calf to run small (my problem is always that the calf is too big, and these fit me) but many of the boots have panels of elastic in the calf so they could probably stretch to accommodate a larger calf, like the Stuart Weitzman 5050 boot.
JCA
Not sure if they come in black, but I have 14″ calves and just got some cognac colored Anne Klein knee-high boots from Zappos that fit perfectly! The leather is also very nice. So maybe try that brand?
posey
I have really really skinny legs (I think I measured them as 14″ once) and Aquatalia fits me great. I think I bought my regular size but I’m not 100% sure.
Tory Burch also makes boots that are good for slender calves (the zip-up styles, not the pull-on styles).
AttiredAttorney
Check 6 pm . com. They have some gorgeous, leather boots rights now at outrageous discounts. I got some Fitzwell boots for $50, but they also have Cole Haans marked down to $100.
Anonymous
I don’t know if she’s the healthiest role model, but Bethanny Frankels’ book Naturally Thin has a lot of good concepts about eating in moderation and splurging only when you really want to and when its worth it. She talks about emotional eating and deciding to not let food have power over you. I enjoyed it and thought it made a lot of sense.
I struggled with food being a focus of my daily life and occupying way too much of my energy for a long time. This book wasn’t a turn around, but it reinforced a lot of the things that I had already learned / decided as I grew older.
Anonymous
Yes I like Naturally Thin. I know that Bethany struggled with unhealthy eating habits (and I think she still does) but her books present a great way to think about food and good tips (eat a small protein snack before going to a party so you don’t binge, you can have pizza but just eat 1-2 pieces with veggies on top not the entire pizza, etc….). I think some of her recent tips have gone a little too far (i.e. how to take the fat and calories out of everything!). But her original book is good.
Diana Barry
“Intuitive Eating” by Evelyn Tribole is good – it helped me when I was struggling with restriction, over-exercising, etc.
Anon
+1 This book changed my life and got me on the road to recovery from bulimia.
Sydney Bristow
I really liked Secrets of a Former Fat Girl by Lisa Delaney. The author is funny and very honest about her struggles.
NYC
This is more in the specific plan category (but doesn’t prescribe the actual food part), but Beck’s Diet Solution was a complete revelation for me and is the reason I have been at my goal weight for the past 7 years (and got back to goal after having a baby). I also do Weight Watchers, but the behavioral stuff in Beck’s made all the difference.
Killer Kitten Heels
In the “more memoir-ish” category, I like “French Women Don’t Get Fat.” In the more concrete plans category, I’ve recently discovered and enjoyed Jackie Warner’s “This is Why You’re Fat!” (totally offensive title, but she has a lot of good information and a very reasonable concrete plan for dealing with diet and exercise).
Anne Shirley
I just finished French Women Don’t Get Fat! I’m finding that spending my morning commute time reading about making healthy choices gives a big boost to my day. I also enjoyed The Switch, if anyone else is looking. A bit too extreme for me, but very interesting to see how she approached making a psychological change.
preg 3L
I really enjoyed The Happiness Project, and it briefly covered food/diet but was more focused on whole life happiness. I found it motivating and very interesting (it even had some practical tips, like wear socks to sleep better).
Bonnie
Second for the Happiness Project. I may read it again actually.
Senior Attorney
“Half-Assed” by Jenette Fulda is a great weight-loss memoir. She lost half her body weight on the South Beach diet. She also has a weight loss blog at pastaqueen dot com. (She’s had a significant regain since then, but the book is still a fun read and inspiring!)
A Nonny Moose
Not diet as in losing weight, but diet as in what you eat: I really like Omnivore’s Dilemma and In Defense of Food. I’m hoping to read Food Rules soon, also by Michael Pollan.
Sydney Bristow
I just finished Food Rules. He describes things in the most interesting way that make so much sense. His big point is to eat real food, not “processed foodlike substances” and one of the rules is avoid food products containing ingredients that no ordinary human would keep in the pantry.
It’s very aspirational as far as I’m concerned, but I think making at least some effort to follow some of the rules would be a great thing to do.
Miz Swizz
I really enjoyed Thin is the New Happy by Valerie Frankel. It’s more about body acceptance though she does lose some weight. I liked reading about someone really examining her food and body issues and it’s done in a constructive and uplifting way.
Anon
South Beach diet worked well for me. I have lost about 30 pounds so far (it has slowed down, which I know is normal the closer I get to my goal but still frustrating.) I really liked that once I kind of had the basics down, it is very easy to meal plan and to eat pretty much anywhere we go. So it is not so restrictive that it is hard to go to parties or out to eat. I was eating a ton of white/refined sugar and carbs before hand, so this was a good change for me and a good way to stop that habit. (For example, I really don’t like meat but was not good at incorporating other types of protien, so I would just fill up on pasta with sauce or bread/tortillas or potatoes. Now instead I will eat a larger serving of lean protien–sometimes even meat now–but have more vegetables and a carb like sweet potato.) Anyway, I also started making exercise a priority for me (walking at lunch and then a workout in the evenings like 30 day shred or pilates). For me, getting enough exercise makes me want to eat better so that works for me.
Frugal doc..
Any knee-high boot suggestions for those with narrow calves?
I stopped in DSW yesterday and everything I tried on looked huge… Bad luck?
I would love a black leather boot. Since I live in Chicago, would prefer one that would hold up in winter weather, and I would love it even more if it was professional and comfortable enough that I could wear it to work/all day. I am on my feet a lot. No narrow/spike or high heels. Either a slight chunky heel or a wedge or flat. No buckles, no tassles.
I’ve never tried Aquatalia, but saw it suggested here recently. Do they run small or big in the calf?
LilyB
frye boots are the best and I find they’re good for people with narrow/smaller than average-size calves. I have the melissa button is a beautiful bordeaux color but they have them in black also and they are so classy looking, I seriously get compliments all the time. Not sure if they’d be okay in your office though, they’re like riding boots. I would probably not wear mine on days when there’s a ton of snow, but I use oil on them regularly to keep them looking nice and I don’t mind if they get a little wet.
Frugal doc..
Thanks for this. I would have never looked at Frye, as I always think of the classic casual cowboy boots as “Frye”. I work in the hospital, which is less formal then a lawfirm etc.. but I don’t want anything too casual. I think riding boots can go either way. I’ll take a look…
Anonymous
This really depends on style though. I first ordered the Paige Talls and had to send them back because the calves were so large that they looked like galoshes on me. I then tried the Melissa Back Zip (less cowgirl than the Melissa Button) and they were perfect.
Sparrow
Try the Impo brand from DSW. You may have to look online if they don’t have them in stores. I bought three pairs in a simliar style (black, brown and a grey suede) b/c I like them so much. They have a moderate heel and I find them very comfortable.
Frugal doc..
I like your style… when I find something I like and that fits, I often buy it in multiple colors. I will look for the Impo… Thanks.
Nancy Blackett
I have a pair of La Canadienne boots which I found around this time last year when I was searching for basically the same thing as you. I got a pair of 3″ heeled boots which I was slightly skeptical of comfort-wise but they had a platform and are actually more comfortable than another pair of flat boots I have. I’ve worn them through a lot of snow and even through some deep accidental puddles and they haven’t leaked a bit.
I’ve found good deals on Amazon on older styles, but their website is here: http://www.lacanadienneshoes.com/
Nancy Blackett
They are more expensive, but for how much I’ve worn them and how dry they’ve kept my feet I maintain they are well worth the splurge.
Marilla
Agreed – I have a pair of La Canadiennes I bought 3 years ago and they’re holding up really well (Toronto winters, so not as bad as Montreal but not exactly Florida, either – lots of slushy puddly snow). La Canadienne has always been the brand I knew I would splurge on for boots when I could afford it, and it was a great choice.
Frugal doc..
Great advice. I have also decided to buy a nicer pair that will last. I do love the La Canadiennes that I bought last winter that are short booties. They are black suede, but I do feel that I am constantly trying to avoid wearing them in bad weather….. maybe the suede is less durable.
Do you find the knee high ones to be narrow?
Nancy Blackett
I do – that was one of the major reasons I ended up buying them (I was really sick of knee high boots flapping around on my legs). Some styles are narrower than others though, check the “Boot opening measure” which Amazon has. I found that 14″ has worked for my narrow calves, but I know there are others out there who have narrower calves than me.
tesyaa
I have a pair of Vaneli boots and the calf is very narrow. I’d say I have small-medium calves and the boots are skin tight, even though they aren’t a stretch material (they’re leather).
Frugal doc..
Thanks for this. I’m always wondering whether I should search for the perfect black boot that actually fits properly, or go for one with the stretchy stuff in the back – which tend to start smaller. The downside is I find that most of the ones with the stretchy stuff collapse more and wrinkle around the ankle.
anon
i have a pair of alberto fermani’s that I got on sale from nordstrom rack last year. They’re perfect. I think the calf is about 13″ around which is PERFECT for me.
Frugal doc..
Thanks for this. I have had good luck at Nordstrom rack in the past and wish there was one closer to me. 13″ calf is what I’m going for. Thank you.
posey
I posted above but didn’t want you to miss this – Aquatalia is great for skinny legs. I have really skinny legs and my Aquatalia boots fit beautifully.
Frugal doc..
Many thanks! Probably I should hit Nordstrom’s once to try them, and then wait for the end of season sales….
This year I am going to be smart and find my boots/coat now… and wait to buy until black friday or the post Christmas sales.
Famouscait
Pregnancy/TTC question:
What are some good products or treatments that you’ve used to combat acne while TTC or during pregnancy? I was able to keep my skin reasonably clear with a small amount of Retin A + salicylic acid face wash + Clarisonic brush. However, my OB said Retin A is off limits, and now that we’re TTC again (and will hopefully be preggers again soon) I don’t know what to do. I turn 31 on Saturday and really wish I could’ve left this issue behind in my teens or 20’s, but alas, I did not. Those damn zits seem to be with me to stay. Any ideas or recommendations?
Frugal doc..
good question…
You could move to topical antibiotics or even over the counter benzoyl peroxide topicals. If your acne gets quite bad, have you thought about one visit with a dermatologist for suggestions? If you have hormonal acne, pregnancy can be rough for some, and probably most topicals wont do the trick.
I’ll be curious if others have suggestions.
buffybot
I’ve been told by my derm that even those topical treatments aren’t OK if pregnant…though no idea if that’s just from an over-abundance of caution.
Anon
This is my fear too when I *hopefully * decide to TTC. How about a benzyl peroxide treatment?
Hey- maybe you’ll be lucky and you will be one of the women who has perfect skin while pregnant.
Anonymous
OOf. I heard that salicylic acid face washes are also off the table when TTC or pregnant. Could you go to Lush and ask for their recommendations? You could try a traditional face soap or bar with tea-tree oil. I would also exfoliate a little more often than normal (but the clarisonic may solve this issue).
HM
wait what? I’ve been using the same Neutrogena Oil-Free Acne Wash with 2% salicylic acid on my face and chest my entire pregnancy (as well as for the past 15+ years). How is this daily facial wash bad for the baby?
Anonymous
I don’t think its recommended. The topical ingredients can get absorbed into the bloodsteam. However, it has only been shown to cause problems via very high doses ingested orally. So, to be safe (perhaps overly cautious), it is recommended to discontinue using cleanser with it in it while pregnant, but I certainly would not stress out over the fact that you’ve been using a very low dose topically. Maybe just switch to something else now.
HM
Thanks for information! Guess I’ll add my face wash to the list of things to avoid until April!
Famouscait
This is my go-to as well! I’ve been using the same face wash for more years than I can remember. I’m not so much worried about the salicylic acid as being harmful, but that it alone doesn’t do enough for my skin. But I will certainly inquire with my OB as well regarding the safety issue.
Aggie
Lush’s Coal Face is an absolute lifesaver for me. The grit from the charcoal is a great exfoliant – it does not remove makeup very well but is a great face wash. I was not comfortable constantly applying chemicals to my face and weaned myself off of them a year ago. (Not TTC or pregnant, just more conscious of beauty products.)
Large concentrations of Salicylic Acid are on the no list for pregnant women because the acid – which is in the aspirin family – is easily absorbed through the skin. Daily use increases absorption which increases exposure.
Famouscait
Thanks for the Lush recommendation. I had been considering an Origins charcoal mask, but I think the Lush product might be better for me.
ohc
+1 for Lush Coal Face. Try a toner, too–I love their Breath of Fresh Air just for general moisturizing, but they also have a tea tree toner for more acne-prone skin and a rosewater toner for drier skin.
Aggie
+1 on the toner suggestion…I use Breath of Fresh Air every day. I put mine in a travel sized spray bottle and spritz it on my face. It will wake your face up in the morning.
The tea tree oil toner is great as well, it is too drying for me for every day use but I enjoy it for hot summer days.
mascot
My doctor was ok with my using just one salicylic acid product while pregnant (for me, face wash). I also like diluted tea tree oil as a spot treatment.
Godzilla
Is sulfur okay for pregnant ladies? There are sulfur masks and face washes. I love my sulfur wash.
anon
Is sulfur okay for pregnant ladies? There are sulfur masks and face washes. I love my sulfur wash.
Godzilla
I use Sumadan, which is a prescription sulfur wash. I have never used a sulfur mask but I always mean to.
Maddie Ross
Belli has a line of acne products for pregnancy/TTC that use tea tree oil and other safe products. I used their acne face wash and acne treatment while pregnant. I also bought their lotion, but found it too thin for my taste. I ultimately used my plain old olay lotion, but did stop using anti-aging products.
rosie
You should double check that the ingredients are ok for pregnancy, but I like the Burt’s Bees roll on blemish stick for spot treating.
NYC
I got the clarisonic brush during pregnancy, and started using the Paula’s Choice AHA gel (BHA is off limits but my research said AHA is okay). Both have worked really well for me and are still what I use post-nursing. I haven’t had to go back to my prescription stuff.
Famouscait
Thanks for the suggestion!
Brant
My adult acne cleared up when I got pregnant!! Now that baby is here, it’s back but while pregnant just mild cleanser and the clarisonic kept me breakout free.
posey
I’m not telling you what to do because obviously you have to be comfortable, but look at the research on salycylic acid and make your own decision. The prohibition is based on a study of women who drank salycylic acid, which is very different than applying it to your face as very little (if any) gets absorbed into your bloodstream. I spoke with a dermatologist about this and he agreed, noting that no OB is going to tell you that it’s OK, but that it’s really overblown.
Anonymous
Yes. It goes into that HUGE category of things whose effects on pregnancy are really unknown. Based on small studies involving huge quantities (and mostly self-reported usage information) there are perceived risks and so these things become contraindicated. There’s entire classes of drugs where the effects are “unknown” and they are therefore put on the “do not use” list.
Then its up to you to decide whether the possible small risk is worth it or if you can get the same relief / result from something else.
Conducting experiments on pregnant humans is not feasible so there’s no way to really know.
Anon
This might sound crazy – and I thought it was until I tried it and had amazing results – but my skin has improved incredibly by drinking apple cider vinegar (diluted with water) daily. Not just improvement in acne but overall my skin just looked SO much brighter and better. I HATE the taste and am still working on mixing it in different fruit juices to hide the taste. Twice I’ve stopped drinking it because I hate the taste that much, but each time my skin got worse and duller in appearance, and everything else in my skin care regime stayed exactly the same so I have decided the vinegar is the magic solution and I am willing to suffer through the taste to have amazing skin (at very little expense!). You have to use the unpasteurized ACV, Bragg’s is a popular one. I’ve read some people also use the vinegar to make a face wash/toner but I haven’t tried that yet. Google around and you’ll find lots of info about it!
Godzilla
Bragg’s makes ACV juices! I found some in my hipster bodega. I’ll report back on how they taste.
I am a banana.
I started using the First Aid Beauty facial radiance pads a few months ago and my blackhead and monthly huge zit problem is gone. Cannot. Recommend. Enough.
– Suddenly have perfect skin.
Famouscait
Thanks banana!
P.S. You are my favorite food. Also, I have a banana phone.
Snackpack
This is late, but hopefully you are still reading…I love African black soap and Dickinson’s witch hazel wipes. I use the Dickinson’s wipes at night to remove makeup and I don’t do anything else to my face at night (no moisturizer or treatment products). For the soap, I have a bar (Nubian Heritage, available on Amazon) and a liquid (Alafia, which I picked up in the natural section of Fresh Market). I use the liquid African black soap in the shower. With these two products combined, my skin has been much better – fewer big breakouts and the ones I was getting were more superficial. I recently started using my new Clarisonic with the liquid soap twice per week and have noticed a big reduction in clogged pores and blackheads
A friend’s girlfriend told me about the black soap – she had terrible acne and said her holistic dermatologist gave her an rx to start and then weaned her off to the black soap and she’s had no problem ever since. I read in a magazine that Drew Barrymore uses the Dickinson’s wipes, so I tried them since, hey, I’d take her skin any day! The only other product I use is a light moisturizer with salicylic acid, which you are trying to avoid, but even when I’ve tried others I’ve had good luck staying clear with this routine.
FWIW, I’ve struggled with hormonal acne since age 16 (I am 32 now) and have tried multiple rx’s over the years. It seems like the rx’s have always stopped working after 6 months but this routine is going on a year and my skin is the clearest it’s ever been.
New Atty
Also a late post, but hoping it will be helpful. Ever considered Rose Water? It is a fantastic astringent/toner and really helped my skin. (Also never been pregnant but conscious of what goes into/onto my body.) I would also recommend brands like Dr. Hauschka or Santa Maria Novella for more natural products that are ‘healthier.’
Etsy Shop for Cashmere Sweater?
Anyone have luck with an Etsy shop that makes made-to-order cashmere or other knit sweaters? I know EXACTLY the type of sweater I want for my winter wedding but have been unable to find it (closely knit ivory or cream cashmere wrap, v-neck, stopping at my natural waist). Now I’m thinking maybe I can get someone to make it for me….
Thanks in advance!
Pink
I’m not on etsy, but as a knitter, be prepared for it to be pretty pricey. It sounds like you’re ok with that, but buying the supplies themselves will be pricey if you want cashmere.
Aggie
+100, the yarn alone will be high. The cashmere yarn on my needles right now is $18 for 82 yards. The sweater you are describing would require at least 15 hanks of yarn, so at least $270 for the yarn alone.
When is the wedding? I only ask because it takes me nearly a month to knit a sweater, I’m not a particularly fast or slow knitter. If this is for a late november wedding you might be cutting it close.
Nonny
Can’t make any recommendations, but like Pink, I am also a knitter and suggest that if you aren’t stuck on cashmere, you may do better pricewise. If you want cashmere because it is soft, be aware that there are many other fibres that are just as soft but may be less expensive – e.g. alpaca, an alpaca/silk blend, or even various breeds of wool. If you end up with a knowledgeable knitter, she or he should be able to suggest a fibre that will have the properties you want.
Cashmere and merino have had massive marketing efforts behind them, which is the reason why they are the fibres in highest demand for retail purposes. But knitters and other fibre artists know that there are lots of other fibres out there that may not have made it to the retail environment, but that are just as nice or even nicer.
OP
Interesting–this is really helpful. I guess I am not stuck on cashmere, I just need something soft, thin, warm, and not itchy….
My wedding is actually in a year but I was looking now because I figure there are more sweaters in the market in October/November than in the spring or summer!
Aggie
This is the perfect time to begin this process, it leaves the knitter with the least stress and will ultimately net a better finished product.
Do you have a yarn store in your area? If so, it would be a worthwhile trip for you. Take a look at the range of fibers, especially alpaca, all different types of wool and the various silk blends. You can also get a feel of the gage and weight of each classification of yarn to from a knitted sample. Closely knit yarn in worsted weight will dwarf a closely knit fingering weight sweater.
And you should scout the color ways of the yarn you select on your own. Ivory/cream is very subjective and difficult to see on a computer screen. Some brands have 6 different color ways that would match that description.
There may actually be a resident fiber artist in the store who can knit this for you. They can also fit the sweater exactly to your measurements and size it almost like a tailor would.
espresso bean
Just had to share about a new product I discovered in case it helps any other fair-skinned, dark-haired ladies. I always look kind of blah because of my hair/skin combination (I’m always the palest person in the room, and my hair is a dark chocolate brown). I used to use a rosy blush, but no matter how much I piled on, it didn’t really seem to help the wan look. I went to Sephora, and they recommended a blush that scared me in the compact but ended up being perfect for brightening up my face. It’s Sephora brand, and it’s called Raspberry Sheen. I love it! It stays on all day and looks like a bright natural flush. I had no idea a brighter color would make such a difference.
Anonymous
One of the best makeup tips I’ve heard is to wear the brightest blush you can, but apply it sparingly.
Cb
Ooh, thanks for the rec. I’m fair with dark hair, must check that out when I’m next in a city with a sephora.
TBK
Ooh, I’ll have to look into that! I’m also fair with dark brown hair, and have zero color in my cheeks. That plus my natural red/purple under eye circles make me look especially awesome sans make-up.
New Atty
Random tip, but applying light blush on your temples helps. This will sound so weird, but I also read once that putting blush (like a cream blush) on your earlobes brightens your face/smile in a subtle, can’t-define-it way. Bobbi Brown advises a really light blush on your cheek and a much brighter blush on just the apples of the cheeks. It takes practice so you don’t look like a clown, but it can look really nice. Obviously I like blush!
Anon
I recently took a job that I love but that was a 50% pay cut from my previous job (oof). For various reasons in the long term this will be a great investment, but at the moment I am feeling broke as a joke. Does anyone have anything they do to make extra money on the side that you can do while working a full time plus job? (i.e. I work about 60 hours a week)
Other tips for how to adjust ones lifestyle?
Anne Shirley
Cancel cable, visit the library more often, plan your meals, don’t shop recreationally are all my go to budget changes. At a 50% pay cut though, I’d have to move somewhere radically cheaper, and with a roommate. I would also switch to a linger repayment plan on my student loans.
Personally, my favorite extra work is babysitting. Unlike tutoring, there’s no prep requirement, and sitting on Friday or Sarurday night would often make me $60-80, plus using their cable, plus then I wasn’t going out anywhere.
Killer Kitten Heels
If you’ve scored well on standardized tests, you can be a prep course teacher/tutor. I’ve taught LSAT prep courses on and off for years when I needed to fill in some financial gaps. The initial time investment (reading through the materials the company provides) is a bit much, but once you’ve taught the course once, you can basically do it in your sleep, and the money is fantastic ($25-$40/hour, depending on your area and which company you teach for).
Deep End
I used to work at a farmer’s market on Saturdays . It was pretty much all day, early morning until about 5 p.m. I liked it because it involved physical labor (physically moving crates of fruit and vegetables around), was so fun to be around and learn about all the different produce, and at the end of the day I’d get to take home large bags of free produce, including dented heirloom tomatoes. I made about $100/each Saturday and acquired enough tomatoes to stock my freezer with spaghetti sauce for the entire winter.
roses
Weekend taskrabbit?
TT
Dog sitting has been my go to for extra cash. I work primarily for family friends, but a few have referred me to other clients so I’m expanding. It may not work for you if you have to be at the office for all of the 60 hours you work (most of the dogs are used to being alone for a normal workday but not extra time), but I get several jobs each year that are just for the weekend so those could be a possibility. I usually stay at the client’s house, so I have the weekend to watch TV, catch up on work, and go for walks with the dog.
mascot
Do you like kids? Being a babysitter for weekend nights may be an option. It’s pretty easy if you have kids that go to bed early. Plus, if you like the family, you could even do overnights.
M.
Love this blog. He is far more committed than I am but there are some great tips here for cutting back.
http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/
Anonymous
Very random TJ, but I just got a new pair of shoes and they are squeaking so much on the inside when I walk! It’s the foot inside my shoe, if that makes sense-I may be over thinking this but I think it’s my toenails rubbing against the leather inside? I feel like this has happened a couple of times recently-is this normal? Or are my toenails somehow particularly loud? TIA!
Fiona
The only time I had squeaking shoes was when they were too big.
Ashley
If you are not wearing hose, try those little foot thingies? Like Hue sock liners — the ones cut low enough they don’t show.
I am a banana.
Bodyglide them.
Samantha
If you have vaseline or hand cream or lip balm at your desk, maybe try a little bit of that on the squeaky part of your foot/shoe?
basil
Curious what the higher ed ladies think of this: http://www.ginandtacos.com/2013/10/30/about-those-tuition-increases/
Anon for this
Ok, don’t want to out myself, but a couple of things:
-I work at a university that is tuition-driven. We do not have a huge endowment nor is financial aid endowed, so the financial aid balances against our operating budget. Terrible situation to be in when you raise tuition every year and students can’t pay any more than they could before. It becomes a case of diminishing returns (students become “more expensive”) and the university where I work is attempting to address this. Unfortunately, trying to address it strategically last year led to a 25% smaller freshman class. Ouch.
-Yes, shiny new buildings and debt service cost a lot of money. We are currently in the midst of a major classroom building renovation. However, the cost of NOT doing these renovations means that students see your campus as shabby and unappealing. High expectations = higher costs. Students want dorms with all of the amenities and clean, newer buildings with new technology.
-yes, in the days when our enrollment was rising, we were also growing in administration and our administration has admitted that. We moved a lot from the colleges to the provost’s office so there are now a lot of extra administrators in Academic Affairs. However, many of those positions are needed for assessment and accreditation purposes. A lot of stressors there.
-Our library Dean does not make nearly that much. And our associate Deans are notoriously underpaid. I think the school they’re talking about are research universities with a lot more money than we have.
My two cents.
Anon for this
Oh and one other thing:
-another issue we’ve had is failed administrators who were hired with tenure. They continue working at a reduced capacity (teaching a few classes) with their administrator salary. Lots of resentment about that here, especially in this difficult financial time.
A Nonny Moose
FYI, your website is still linked to your username. Be careful posting anon in the future, because you’re not!
Anon for this
Oh well. So much for that.
Monday
Yes, this is a widely held opinion–that upper-level admins with amazing salaries and benefits are the problem, and that of course they plan according to their own interests. For the most part I agree this is a huge issue, and probably the primary one. However, 2 additions:
1) Student Affairs/Student Life people should not be counted as part of the same overgrown mess of admins– even those whose jobs didn’t exist 10 years ago. The college population is far more diverse than it ever has been in the past (which is a good thing) and the support systems that used to be enough are not nearly cutting it now. Even accounting for staff growth, most Student Life branches are overworked due to unprecedented volumes of learning issues, mental illness, disabilities etc. among students. If the schools are going to have them there, it’s not safe or ethical not to have competent, adequate staff to support them, and that costs.
2) I think there’s a Catch-22 in terms of the facility-type expenses that drive tuition up. The more students and parents are paying, the more they expect, and rightly so in a way. I don’t know what to do about that, but I think the attractions of online learning are one extreme response in the opposite direction: to go from expecting state-of-the-art accommodations in everything, to having no physical structure whatsoever.
Famouscait
+1 to your point #2.
I’d also like to add that my job as a fundraiser didn’t exist at my university 35+ years ago. But that’s because at that time, state funds covered the U entirely. Now, we’ve seen state funds reduced back to less than 40% of the U’s budget, therefore raising private funds is a necessity. Thus, I have a job, and it is indeed classified as “administrative”.
Back Home
+2 My alma mater (large public school in the South) received 80% of its funding from the state 15 years ago. Now it receives 11%. I am seeing a lot of university job listings lately for development positions because we need staff to find funding to make up this gap.
Monday
One thing I should add is Title IX. Schools are still in the slow process of starting to actually take assault and harassment seriously, and it’s extremely heavy, formal and potentially litigious when it’s actually handled by the book. Not only does a school need a skilled coordinator for Title IX, they also need a lot of disciplinary, support and counseling staff to deal with everything related.
Anonymous
Work in higher ed at a huge univ. I agree with a lot of this. Tuition is out of control. However, I think one thing missing from this is the college experience is expected to be waaay more than just classes now. Student groups. academic events. academic advisement. networking nights. resume reviews. career services. counselling. health services. dorm cleaning. special events. highly marketable research initiatives. conference hosting. The list goes on and on, and each of these things requires staff to put it together. Also, students want stellar faculty, not usually low fac/student ratios (though I personally see the value) so a lot is also about recruitment and offering the course(s) with particular, well0paid faculty, as much as possible.
Sarabeth
A countervailing perspective: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/25/education/despite-rising-sticker-prices-actual-college-costs-stable-over-decade-study-says.html
TLDR; sticker prices have gone up significantly at private colleges, but the real cost to students hasn’t actually risen nearly as significantly. Instead, there’s been a massive increase in ‘merit aid’ (often, unfortunately, given to upper-middle-class students instead of working-class students who need it more).
So admin salaries are coming partly out of tuition, yes, but also out of the savings from having increasing numbers of college teachers working as adjuncts and getting paid peanuts (at my very expensive liberal arts college–where, thank god, I am on the tenure track–adjuncts get $3500 per course. Standard course load is 5 courses a year. You do the math).
(Former) Clueless Summer
How does L&T cashmere sweaters fit? TTS? Like J. Crew sweaters?
MJ
TTS, slightly boxier than Jcrew, but much, much less pilling. L&T is better. However, unless you need a sweater RIGHT now, I highly encourage you to wait–they will be much cheaper in late Nov up thru the first two weekends in December. Yes, I stalk L&T cashmere ;)
Baconpancakes
Yes, pretty much. It’s a little boxy, but I don’t expect cardigans to fit like they were tailored, and the only piling I’ve noticed after a year of heavy wear is right at the armpits.
(Former) Clueless Summer
Thanks! The Bay (Canada) has them on sale for $85 right now…seems very reasonable, but should I be waiting for cheaper prices?
emmabean
I’m late to this thread, but want to mention if you’ve never seen Sweet Pea clothes in a store before – be warned, they are a weird material…mesh would be how I would explain it, I guess? They’re flattering on me as they’re stretchy, so it’s not a bad thing, just thought I’d mention for any of those considering this shirt!
BB
Today in suits that make you go “WHAAAAAAT?”
http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/ProductDetail.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524446645271&&site_refer=AFF001&mid=13816&siteID=BolFSqx4S4U-PCmJj7mM8wPtt28E9R_0OA&LScreativeid=1&LSlinkid=10&LSoid=298497
On the plus side, it being Halloween, this could double for a cow costume.
preg 3L
Hilarious!! Maybe better as separates??
Bonnie
No wonder it’s on the clearance rack.
Godzilla
So fashion.
Anon
Much statement.
Kanye East
wow