Splurge Monday’s TPS Report: Elowen Sheath Dress

Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

Theory Dress - ElowenYes, yes: everyone tells us that emerald is the color of the season. I get it. I like it, I guess. And yet, for some reason, I feel like I’m more drawn to olive things right now. This “cactus” colored dress from Theory is no exception — I can see it looking great with blacks, grays, last season’s cobalts, and (mais oui!) my beloved purple pumps. The dress is also available in black (at Nordstrom, Saks, etc) — both versions are $295. Theory Dress – Elowen

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  1. I like the cut, but I’m not sure about the color.

    • Likewise. As someone with reddish undertones, olive looks awful on me. But for those with different coloring, I’m sure this would be beautiful!

      • Agreed, I’d look like death warmed over in this colour but for someone quite pale or quite dark, it’d be lovely.

        • I’m very pale and can’t wear olive at all. My friend who has more olive skintones (although not dark skinned) looks great in olive, mustard, yellow-green, etc. All colors that make me look awful.

    • I love this color but can never seem to find things I like (I like this dress, but it’s a bit pricey and formal for my office) in it. I’m blonde with dark eyes and brows, pale but more yellow than pink. I actually look good in a range of colors that could be described as “baby poo.”

      On the other hand, that really pretty pale blush color that was popular a couple of years back makes me look like a corpse. Ditto paler shades of camel.

      • hi color twin! Same as you, olive looks great, but a lot of pretty pastels don’t flatter. I’m seriously considering ordering this.

    • Funny — I have an olive sheath from Calvin Klein and its one of my most versatile staples! A great neutral for me. I have dark hair and medium skin with olive undertones.

      • Olive is a great color for me too. I have warm brown hair, warm fair skin & hazel eyes. Olive seems to almost match my eyes & makes them really pop. It does nice things for my skin too.

    • hoola hoopa :

      Agreed. Love the shape of the dress but not the color. Olives usually look good on me (warm coloring), but I unfortunately don’t like it!

  2. Ireland tips? :

    Immediate TJ! I’m planning a trip to Ireland in the next couple of months for my husband & I. We’ll be there for a week and would like to spend some time in Dublin, Galway, and the Aran Islands. Any recommendations on hotels, etc. would be great! Also any tips on the best way to get from Dublin to the West would be greatly appreciated!! Thanks ladies.

    • momentsofabsurdity :

      No tips but have fun! Sounds fantastic!

    • My brother and I ended up getting a little bit lost driving around Ireland and ended up in this absolutely lovely town called Trim with a medieval castle, stayed in a cute little b&b, and had a fabulous dinner in the local hotel. We remember it super fondly because we had just come from Paris and a terrible low-cost flight, and the warmth and comfort and greenness of the town was just amazing. So I highly recommend just booking a car and driving around to see what you find!

    • My family and I went to Ireland last year and did Dublin, Galway, and Killarney. In Dublin we stayed at The Burlington. We actually didn’t stay in Galway, we were on the Connemara Coast and stayed at the Connemara Coast Hotel. Killarney was The Malton. All were BEAUTIFUL, particular the Marlton. The Burlington was really nicely located, only a few (totally walkable) blocks from Temple Bar. The Connemara Coast was really nice, but too far from anything in my opinion. We ended up eating all our dinners at the hotel, because there was nothing near by. So, maybe consider a visit to the coast, but definitely stay in Galway.

    • Calibrachoa :

      *rubs hands together* oh dear, where to start….. :D

      What kind of things are you looking to do in Dublin? Food and drinks, art, music, history…? I can dredge up a ton of recommendations if you can narrow it down a little – except with the whole living here thing, I can’t say much about the accommodation. And I strongly caution against driving in Dublin – in the countryside it’s grand but in the city it is a nightmare. In general the place is small enough to walk everywhere, or take public transit.. and the place also has more taxis than New York City. (Pre-booking can be a good idea; I recommend VIP taxis) Howth and Bray are both a 20 minute DART away for seeing the seaside and Malahide with it’s castle not further away than that.

      To get to the west coast, the easiest and budget-friendliest way is to get a train from Euston Station in Dublin out to Galway – it takes about 2.5 hours and if you book it in advance, you can get a return for €20 per person.
      Unfortunately I know little about Galway as I have tended to breeze through to get to the Aran Islands – there, I definitely recommend the South Aran House on Inisheer both for the wonderful rooms and great food – not to mention the lovely folks running the place! On Inishmore, the Clai Bán Bed and Breakfast was wonderful to stay at and the dog was the friendliest ever! The pub near to it, Joe Watty’s, had gorgeous food and a really great atmosphere. We also ate at the pier hotel and the food was amazing, but the atmosphere was nothing special.
      I also definitely recommend renting a bike to get around Inishmore- the guided tours are nice, but the best part for us was the cycling and seeing things at our own pace. The Ring Fort and the old churches are not to be missed. in Inisheer, the back of the island is rocks, rocks and some more rocks, so you would be well off walking it’s not a bad walk around the island and the views are breathtaking. You get to be away from everything and everyone out there!
      … darn. Now I want to go back. XD

      • studied abroad in Dublin :

        +1 to Howth and Bray – great little towns for day trips, beautiful hiking

    • Anon in DC :

      Everything Calibrachoa says! Also, Wicklow Way Lodge is a great place to stay within striking distance of Dublin. It’s extremely clean and warm and and orderly, with very friendly hosts and the best oatmeal you’ll ever eat. When we stayed there last, they had a barn full of just-born lambs–the cutest things I’ve ever seen. From there, it’s a beautiful drive across the mountains to the west. To go a little farther north of Galway and Sligo, Donnegal is gorgeous and you can rent a house for a very small amount of money. And if you’re in Sligo, don’t miss the Celtic Seaweed Baths! You can take a seaweed bath in a beautiful old claw-fot tub in a room overlooking the rocky Atlantic shore. Gorgeous.

  3. This dress would be a straight-up minidress on anyone over about 5’7″…notice that the model is standing sort of sideways to mask the fact that it’s nearly midthigh on her. If I’m going to take my “goin’ clubbing” look to work, this wouldn’t be my first pick for that. On petite ladies, this would be lovely.

    • Actually, the dress length is 39″ according to the Nordstrom website. I’m 5’8″ with a long torso, and that length hits me at the top of the kneecap. I think the model is just 6 feet.

    • a passion for fashion :

      I think she is also wearing a dress that is too small — see how it is pulling across her thighs?

  4. [insert clever name here] :

    This dress is lovely and versatile. Seems about a 1/2 size too small on the model.

    • Legal Recruiters in 2013 :

      And that’s on a model — probably a full size too small on an standard-issue person. Yikes!

      • This dress looks potentially too tight and clingy for the office, as I find Theory dresses often are. The last one I ordered would’ve been good for work if I was a bartender. I’d definitely want to try this one on in the store.

  5. What Watch? :

    I posted this in the weekend thread but I think too late to get any responses. Hoping to do better on a Monday morning.

    ….. What do y’all think of Raymond Weil for a man’s watch? My husband is looking to upgrade his college graduation watch to something nicer. We’d like to stick to classic watch companies, not fashion brands. I know watches carry a lot of subtle meaning, especially for men, just trying to feel out what this brand is associated with. Also, what are your thoughts on Tag vs. Raymond Weil. We’re hoping to stay under $1000 for this, but I’m not sure if that’s realistic. I am not great when it comes to men’s stuff, so any guidance appreciated. Thanks!

    • Dad has a Raymond Weil, Mom has two, and I have her hand me down. Mine is the oldest, now 12-13 years old, and works great!

      Without any outside influences, my fiance chose to upgrade his watch to a Raymond Weil, as well. They are classic, well-made, and simple without being boring. (We did have a slight issue with his watch, and proper time-keeping, but the jeweler simply gave him a new one, and sent the faulty one back to the manufacturer.) I would highly recommend them, but I would caution against buying one online (where you most likely will not get a manufacturer’s warranty). I got fiance’s watch for $1.2K (stainless and gold) and think it was a worthwhile investment.

    • I have a ladies Raymond Weil that I wore daily for 7 years (still works and looks nice, I just got something different). I think they are pretty well regarded brand-wise. My husband has a Tag that he really likes. It has held up nicely to some rough handling on his part. I don’t know that you can find one for under $1000. Talk to a reputable independent jeweler or a wholesaler that does limited sales to the public for better pricing. Also, you may get a a discount for paying cash. If you are in Georgia, I have some suggestions.

      • a passion for fashion :

        I wsa going to say this — i do think the brand is very nice, but i doubt you can find one for less than $1K.

        • What watch? :

          Hmm. Y’all maybe right. The basic RW Tango model appears to be $950 at Tourneau; but DH may want a spiffier Tango that’s more around $1300-1400. My plan was to haggle and pay cash, as needed. Tags do appear to be out of our range though, perhaps for the best since it seems to be frequently worn by others and he’d like to be traditional but slightly less uniform. I know Citizen makes some nice and reliable watches, but his college watch is a lower end Citizen so I think he wants something a bit fancier as a matter of course. Are there any brands I am overlooking? PS: Thanks for all the feedback thus far!

          • What about Longines?

          • Bewitched :

            I’ve mentioned this before, but I bought a beautiful Hamilton for my DH’s birthday-it retailed around $500. Leather band and square face-not the usual metal band and round face as most men’s watches are today, but I’m guessing they carry that style as well.

          • chi squared :

            Tissot is a good brand, and a step below Tag Heuer in terms of price. My husband also has an Oris watch that he really likes – it is on the sporty side as opposed to dressy.

    • I have had a RW for 5+ years and love it! Most men I know wear Tag watches not RW, but I think either is a great choice.

  6. Threadjacking to recommend a dress, especially for Canadian r e t t e s (don’t know if you still have Tristan stores south of the border). Bought this yesterday: http://www.tristanstyle.com/store/app/product/?mid=126&style=FV090F0102Z

    For some reason the website only lists it in black but it is also available in a raspberry colour which is what I have. It’s a soft jersey, but it skims the body perfectly – I have had two kids and my body has plenty of lumps and bumps that the wrong jersey dress brings out in sharp relief. The neckline is not too revealing, so no cleavage, it falls just below the knee on me and I’m about 5’6″ and a half. Plus, it has pockets. It’s very flattering. Also, I used giftcards I got over Christmas to pay for almost all of it. So yay!

    • This is really cute – looks like a great work dress!

    • Any Massachusetts residents remember the Tristan and Isolde store in the South Shore Plaza? I used to love that store and bought some of my first professional clothing there circa 1998. They had some really nice men’s clothing, too. I don’t know when it closed, but its not there any more.

  7. Daenerys Anon :

    T/J: For those who have dealt with long-term unemployment, would you share some thoughts on answering these two questions in an interview? (1) Why did you leave your last position (laid-off, fit was not right because the firm needed a more senior person)? (2) What have you been doing since (basically taking care of family)? I finally have a bite after more than a year and I’m really nervous.

    • By taking care of family, do you mean your kids? If so, I think that’s a pretty easy one: I was laid off from my position at XYZ company because [fill in the blank – work was slow, company wasn’t doing well financially, etc.] and I decided it was the perfect time to focus on my family for a little while. I’m now ready to re-enter the workforce and feel I’m a perfect match for this position because of ABC.

      If by taking care of family, you mean aging parents, I think the explanation is much the same. If it’s a bit more complicated situation (e.g., sibling with mental health issues), that may take a little more tap dancing, but I think the strategy is similar.

      • Agree. One thing I would add, though, is a statement about how you’ve kept up with your industry/skills while out of the workforce. (Did you go to networking events, read industry periodicals, follow industry trends through news articles, blogs, or other sources, keep up with contacts in the industry, do any volunteer work or any writing that is relevant to your field?) If you didn’t do anything over this period, I’d brush up a bit now. You want at least passing familiarity with any major news from your industry from the last year.

        • You probably weren’t planning to do this, but I would not say in the interview that you were laid off because of “bad fit” or because a more senior person was needed. “Bad fit” is often a euphemism for various shortcomings and “need for more senior person” could also reflect negatively on you.

  8. I’m a horrible RA. Facebook + some cryptic emails indicate that something blew up between my students when I was away for the weekend and am dreading the snarky whiteboard messages and the whining I’ll be met with immediately upon entering the common space. Destroying my lovely holiday weekend mood already. Send patient thoughts my way?

    • momentsofabsurdity :

      I am sure you are not horrible. But be patient with them!

      And besides, it can’t be more ridic than the time I was an RA, and the night before finals week, two girls showed up at my door crying hysterically and asked me to help them move their furniture around, because they wanted a change, but just couldn’t agree on a room layout.

      • Diana Barry :

        Haha! College students are really funny. I remember when I was a frosh and kinda liked a guy in my dorm, and he invited me over to his room to hang out….and then told me that he wanted to be a priest, so he couldn’t date anyone! LOL.

        • layered bob :

          ohhhhh I did that. After a breakup, took a vow of celibacy. Sort of surprised the guys I was hanging out with. Then met my now-husband and decided a lifetime of celibacy was not for me.

    • Hug’s to you. You are NOT that bad. When I was in college, I appleid to be an R.A., but they did NOT choose me. They said that I needed to be alot MORE authoretateive then I was so that if some one was doeing something bad, that they WOULD pay attenteion to ME and what I TOLD THEM TO DO. I said that I could do it but they DISAGREED. FOOEY on them!

      My dad said not to worry b/c they realy did NOT choose me b/c I was to cute and all the guy’s would be hitting on me. I told the school and they said he could have been right. They did NOT even know he was MENSA eligeible.

      I have to walk at lunch today b/c I ate a whole SODA bread with BUTTER this weekend that I go at ELI’s. YUMMMMM! but my tuchus is goeing to pay the price dad says, unless I work it off today. The manageing partner said that my tuchus look’s just fine and he want’s me to go with him to the Lamb’s club. I vote for the Lamb’s club and the COBB salad but I will walk there. YAY!

    • wintergreen126 :

      Sending good vibes your way! Hopefully, it isn’t anything too crazy.

      I remember my sophomore year, the girls across the hall were totally wasted and thought it would be hilarious to take the fire extinguisher and run up and down the halls and through the stairwells. My RA (and police) had fun with that.

  9. Jackonsville, FL :

    Does anyone know what the legal market is like in Jacksonville, Fl? My fiance (in med school) just got matched into his residency there, and I have no idea what the market is like. I am currently at a larger firm and was hoping to get a similar job there, but my preliminary research isn’t showing too many larger firms in the area.

    • I spent a summer in Jax several years ago with a biglaw firm’s local office. The market is definitely small, but there are some big firms with outposts there as well as a few local firms that are relatively large. Holland + Knight, Foley Lardner, and Rogers Towers come to mind. Rogers Towers is a local firm with probably 70 attorneys with a good rep for business/commercial law. Also look at Akerman Senterfitt, which is a Florida midlaw firm with several offices. There are also a number of larger corporations in Jax which may be a good option if you are considering in-house (e.g., CSX, Fidelity, Blue Cross, Zurich).

      In full disclosure, much of the reason I decided not to return is that the legal culture still feels like a southern old boys club. The people (attorneys and staff) were incredibly nice and polite, but I just didn’t feel like it was a place where I could succeed.

      Good luck! If you want further details, just reply and I’ll post a throw away email.

  10. Legal Recruiters in 2013 :

    I haven’t had any dealings with legal recruiters as a user since I was a 1L looking to switch markets and haven’t used them since on any of my personal lateral moves. I am getting deluged by them now. What I don’t know (and can’t rightly ask) is what role they play for partner hiring in my city (not NY-DC-LA-SF-Chicago, but a city large enough to have professional sports teams). I don’t think that my firm really uses them (if true, likely driven by cost). It’s all “this is for major firms who are expanding in your market” in my inbox, but it just sounds very rosy to my jaded ears.

  11. Anyone know of places where you can rent a projector? Need one for a slideshow (computer, not physical slides) and can’t borrow one from work.

    • Call a large hotel, like a Marriott, and ask for their AV department. These are usually run by independent companies who could rent you something even if you’re not using the hotel meeting space.

    • What about Kinkos?

    • public library

  12. Oof, I sported a super fun emerald mani all weekend but discovered this morning that emerald nail polish can really stain – even with a base coat! Took it off to redo my nails for an interview this afternoon but even after three coats there is a slight green undertone. I’m really glad my interview is over video and so I don’t think they’ll pick it up…

    • I read this as an emerald green mini (as in mini skirt)! Judging by the denziens I saw out and about this weekend, you would not be the only person sporting a green mini skirt this weekend. Not very [this site] though ;)

    • As much as I love the look of dark nails, this is the reason I’m (perhaps irrationally) afraid to try it out. I’ve sported some funky toe polish, but I’m afraid of ending up with navy blue or purple fingers!

      Good luck with the interview, I can’t imagine anyone will notice!

      • I paint my nails darker colors pretty frequently, and putting on a base coat helps with this. Even if I forget, they stop looking dyed in a day or two.

  13. I know there are ladies on [this site] who have posted before about the joys associated with steroid (corticosteroid, not anabolic!) use. Wondering if any of you can help with something…

    I have suffered from migraines since age 9 (I’m now 33). I take preventive medications but still get occasional headaches. If neither triptans nor narcotics successfully treats the migraine, I take a short course of Decadron (dexamethasone). It’s highly effective but has annoying side effects, including bright red blotches on my cheeks. Besides glopping on layers and layers of foundation (I typically wear little/no makeup), does anyone know of a way I might reduce this crazy redness? It’s sensitive to the touch but not raised like a rash.

    • I am sorry for your suffering. I too suffer from Migraines. I cannot help you with your redness problem but I wanted to put in a good word on a medication I take that helps with my migraines at onset. I use Relpax. Because it is fairly new, my doctor had to go a couple of rounds with my insurance company, but it was worth it. I can actually function after taking it. Good luck.

    • Silicon valley chick :

      Don’t think there is much you can do other then topicals. If you aren’t happy with the foundation, I would try something milder/less opaque like L’Oreal BB cream… this wont give the dense color, but has a greenish tint that disappears on red skin and helps decrease the redness. Another option is the Clinique loose powder (Redness solutions line).

      You could also try a course of Decadron that is a lower dose. It may work for your headache as well with fewer side effects.

      But how often are you taking a steroid course? This should be an extremely rare occasion… or else you should have other options at hand or different prophylactics.

      • I appreciate your concern, Silicon valley chick. I’m under the care of a neurologist who monitors my steroid usage carefully, and my PCP is also aware of all my meds. I’ve tried numerous medications/combinations of medications over the years, including both preventive and acute therapies. The regimen that I’m currently using is, for the moment, working as well or better than anything else I’ve tried.

        I’ve had positive experiences with Clinique products in the past – I’ll have to check out their Redness Solutions line.

    • Would anyone else care to share their migraine treatment stories? Within the past few months I have experienced an uptick in migraines and the sumatriptan no longer seems to be effective. What has worked for you?

      • Another migraine sufferer :

        Have you tried the sumatriptan injections? I too had built up a tolerance to the pills, but I find that the injections work much more quickly and effectively. Plus it cuts out the pill-swallowing issue if your migraines make you nauseous, like mine do. Yes, it means giving yourself a shot, but compared to the pain of the migraine it is really not that big of a thing. Just something to try if you haven’t yet.

        • Anonymous :


          Also, make sure you are using the highest pill dose (100mg) of sumitraptan? Have you also tried the other tryptan family members – sometimes others may work better? But the shot can be the best/fastest, once you are used to it.

          • If Imitrex (sumatriptan) is not doing it for you, I highly suggest that you give other triptan medications a try. I currently take Zomig ZMT – a tablet that dissolves without water (Maxalt is another that comes in this formulation). It works better and more often than other triptans I’ve tried, and I like the fact that I don’t need water (it’s great when you’re stuck in traffic on the highway!)

      • I might have to check out the injections. I agree that giving myself a shot is nothing compared to the migraine pain (and nausea). I have tried Maxalt, but it took a very long 2.5 hours to work. I also need to just take the d*mn medication when I feel like I am getting a migraine. I have a tendency to wait too long and by the time I have decided that yep, it’s a migraine, I end up suffering needlessly. I took Friday afternoon off and ran some errands in the spring sun. As soon as I got home the headache started. So now the sun is a trigger too? We have had lots of weather events in the upper midwest this year, and I swear that the storms rolling through have been a contributing factor.

      • Meds aside, think about what is causing the uptick in your migraines. I was able to link the increase of mine to dry air and have them under control again by using a humidifier at home and at the office.

    • Anonymous :

      Benefit makes a primer potion called That Gal that works really well to reduce my allergy related flushing.

  14. SV in House :

    Hi ladies. I’m headed to NYC in a couple of weeks and really want to see Book of Mormon (missed it when the traveling show was in SF). There are plenty of tickets available for the day we’re considering. How important is it to get close seats? Has anyone been in the mezzanine?

    • I just saw this! I sat second row but I would definitely recommend getting whatever seats you can get.

      Honestly, the theater is so small (it’s the same theater where Spring Awakening played, if you saw that) that there isn’t a bad seat in the house. I wouldn’t hesitate to get mezzanine seats, in order to see the show – even the furthest back seats are pretty close, to be honest.

    • Not super important. We sat in the first or second row of the balcony and it was fine. It’s an awesome show but not the sort of thing that requires front row viewing. You’ll love it.

    • funkybroad :

      I saw this about a month ago and sat in the mezzanine. The way the mezz is set up is there are about five rows, then an aisle, and then more rows. I was in the second row in that second group of rows (so, about seventh row or so in the mezz, total) and it made no difference. Anonymous is right that the theater is small, and it’s such a great experience (if you’re very irreverent like me). Go see it!

    • Senior Attorney :

      I saw it from the center of the first row of the mezzanine and honestly, I thought we had the best seats in the house. The theatre is TINY so you’ll be close even upstairs.

    • Thanks, all! I’ll save a little cash and go for the mezzanine.

  15. Threadjack — After doing my taxes this weekend, I’d like to take my refund and set up a Roth IRA for myself and a 529 savings plan for my nephew, but I’m not sure where to start. I have an appointment set up at my bank for next week, but I’m wondering if I should talk to a financial planner instead. Does anyone have any recommendations for a planner in the DC- area, preferably Arlington/Alexandria?

    • Sydney Bristow :

      No advice on the 529, but the Roth is something you can do by yourself. I set me up earlier this year through Vanguard and it was very easy. I went with Vanguard because of their low fees and I thought their website was easy to use. I also just went with a Target Retirement Fund because I didn’t want to worry about changing my risk levels on it as time goes by.

      I’d recommend reading up on the subject to see if its something you think you could do. Suze Orman’s books go into it and a book I Will Teach You To Be Rich has a great section on the types of funds and the differences in the total amount you’ll have after retirement based on the various costs associated with different accounts and providers.

      The standard recommendation if you are going to work with someone directly is to find a fee-only financial planner. You want someone who won’t take a commission on what they sell to you because they may not have your best interests at heart and will sell you things they get high commissions on but which are exactly what you don’t want to buy.

    • Dry-Clean Only Silk? :

      I fell in love with the Carousel shell that Anthropologie has. It looks like it is painted silk. It finally arrived and it is dry-clean only and sleeveless, so I’ll likely wear it when it warms up a little (an in my city, it is humid and I will sweat). I am not afraid that it will be a one dry-clean per wear (between sweat and any makeup smudges, never mind my clumsiness and the fact that I have smallish children) and that it either won’t last or will be a $10/wear shirt. Return, just on practicality? I am flirting with a Boden silk Florence top which has sleeves (so year-round wear), is patterened (camoflague), and washable (for the win?).

      Ugh. And I’m in a brain fog on this issue, so any thoughts appreciated!

  16. Junior League :

    I’m thinking of joining my local Junior League (Northern Viriginia) and I know some ladies here are members. Any thoughts/advice? I’m from the Boston area and, frankly, had no idea what the Junior League was until I moved south of the Mason-Dixon (I was once given the advice not to “dress like a Junior Leaguer” when going to do pro bono work and was totally mystified by what that might mean). I have an idea for some volunteer work I’d like to do with high school students. I started by thinking that the JL might have useful contacts/information, but then thought maybe I’d just look into joining. There’s a meet and greet later in the month I plan to attend, but just thought I’d see what you ladies had to say. Why did you join? What did you think of JL before you joined? How is it different from what you expected? What do you like best/least about it? What do you think are the best/worst reasons for joining? Thanks in advance!

    • I have a dear friend in that chapter who likes it. It’s not a huge chapter so you will get to know people faster. I am a member in another chapter (small city now, previously was in one of the largest chapters in the country).
      Pluses for JL in general: easy to get involved for volunteering, good opportunties to meet people socially, most members are working women so there is potential for networking, well-respected within most communties. Minuses: the organization is only as good as its volunteers so a disorganized chairperson for something could be frustrating, the time commitment for meetings and membership activities can be siginficant depending on the chapter.

    • Dry-Clean Only Silk? :

      I was in the JL of Washington when I lived there. Can’t speak to NoVa’s league, but I lived in NoVa but worked downtown and took metro. DC’s was very large, and about half lawyers. I really liked getting out of the office and having something non-law to do. DC’s also had lots of social things (not sure if NoVa’s skews older and whether they do HHs, etc.). I say go for it — you can always not continue if you don’t like it. I think the area is more pro-JL than other parts of the country. Sandra Day O’Connor used to be the president of the Junior League of Phoenix, so if she can do it, I figured I might as well.

  17. jr associate :

    Any advice on dealing with a partner who doesn’t seem to understand the case you’re working on? We’re at a small firm, working on a huge case with some complicated legal concepts. As the junior, I am much closer to the law so it makes sense that I might know the intricacies better than he does but I’m starting to realize he doesn’t understand the concepts (and we’ve been working on this case forever!) He gets fixated on tangents and wants me to find case law that does not exist and the cases that do exist do not say what he wants it to (because this is a fairly new area of law).

    I’m concerned because he’ll be arguing it, and also need some advice on how to gently inform him that he is totally off-base/help prepare him for the argument.

    • When I have been in the position where I’ve been told to argue something that isn’t supported by the cases, as I read them, I usually say something like “Partner, I’m concerned about our position on Issue because of Case. Could you please read it and then we can discuss?” Sometimes he agrees that he was wrong; sometimes I was wrong because of some issue I didn’t understand. I also figure out an alternative argument in these situations so that I have a solution ready if necessary. But I work exclusively for one partner and we have a close working relationship, so this may not work for you.

      • jr associate :

        I’ve tried suggesting specific cases to read – my concern is that he doesn’t really understand these issues/our arguments – another senior lawyer and I wrote the brief and he has been reviewing it but the changes he suggests are wrong based on the case law and our arguments. I’m in a tricky position because I know he is off-base but I don’t know how to convey that without telling him that he’s totally out to lunch on this one.

        • Will you be mooting him before argument? If nothing else, that would be the time to come up with some very specific questions — e.g., “in light of Jones v Smith and its three-factor test, how do the facts as your client alleges satisfy the second element of the test?” — which *should* alert him that he has work to do. The problem with relying on the moot is that it typically happens just a couple of days before argument, leaving not much time for all that work he’d need to do (especially if he’ll be traveling to attend the argument). Another option is to just ask him moot-like questions when you’re meeting with him. As in, “Partner, I’m not quite understanding this and was wondering if you could help me. As I understand the three-factor test in Jones, blah blah blah, but if we argue blah blah, how does that square with second factor in Jones?” Start by assuming he does get it and then question him as a way of understanding his thinking. Maybe he actually is getting it but you’ve missed something and this gives him a chance to close the loop so it makes sense to you. If he is missing something, your questioning should help clue him into the fact that he needs to dig in. Or he could be a giant blockhead. If that’s the case, there’s a point where being the associate means you let him fall on his face. You can only do so much and the ultimately responsibility to the client is his.

        • Anonymous :

          “I think I’m a bit confused. By my reading of CASE, it’s X because Y and Z. Maybe I missed a step along the way? Could you please spend a couple minutes explaining your thought process to me so I better understand it? Thank you.”

    • SoCalAtty :

      Nothing is more frustrating than dealing with someone your senior that doesn’t understand important legal concepts on a case. Less frustrating if it is really complex, but still difficult. I used to do kind of a dance around the issue, and write a memo. “Dear Partner: From my in depth search, there actually is no case law exactly on point for issue X. From what I have read, the issue is likely to be resolved in Y manner and her are a few cases that support those possibilities.”

      All you can do is provide the cases and memos and prep Partner as best you can. I have gone so far as to prepare a binder for the Partner to take to court with case law, past filings that might be important, and summaries. If he falls flat on his face after that, there is nothing else you can do.

      CA has some weird filing deadline “gotchas” and I was constantly having to explain them to Partners that had been in practice 10+ years more than I. Frustrating.

      • jr associate :

        This is all good advice – thank you ladies! I think the other part of my problem is that the partner likes to be spoon-fed his submissions but this case is more complicated than anything he’s ever done in the past so he actually needs to understand the concepts. And when I try to prepare memos or stuff, he doesn’t read things through all the way so he doesn’t understand it.

        A lot of this stems from my frustrations with him and the fact that I realize I can’t do everything but I’ve worked so hard on this file that its frustrating that it could be messed up because he doesn’t understand things/won’t do all the necessary legwork.

  18. Calibrachoa :

    TJ! I went thrifting on Friday and found a pair of gorgeous trousers that fit me like a dream – Marks and Spencer, some type of jersey knit…. and brown merl pinstripe. I bought them despite having a long-standing aversion to brown, and now I am wondering what on earth to wear with brown pinstripe?

    • You can wear pretty much anything with brown because it’s a neutral. I like some contrast in my outfits so I wear red and tan, yellow, orange, light blue, light purple, white, cream, any pattern that has brown in it. I’ve even seen some outfits of dark brown & light grey that looked great, but I haven’t done it myself.

      For shoes, I either wear dark brown loafers, red or burgundy heels, or leopard print with my dark brown pants & skirts & dresses.

    • Sky blue, lots of pinks, mint green, teal/turqoiuse, most yellows/mustards. Go with a patterned shirt for bonus points! Other browns, tans, or ivory work can work well for a monochromatic look.

    • Well, brown can mean anything from milky coffee to dark chocolate and you don’t say how brown is your brown … but for myself, I like cream and black (together, not one or the other) with all shades of brown, dark midnight blue with lighter browns and tans, and heathered greys with dark brown.

    • I like pairing more saturated colors with my brown pants, to give ’em a bit of oomph–think orange, red, or bright blue.

  19. Nellie's Roman holiday :

    Going to Rome in May with DH! I did a this-site-search for posts about hotel recommendations & got a few great leads. Anyone want to add suggestions for hotels? We haven’t been to Rome before but our favorite hotels in Europe have been on the charming-but-well-appointed end of the spectrum.

    • Hotel Ponte Sisto is my favorite over a number of visits over the years. In a very atmospheric central neighborhood of beautiful streets and squares, good eats within walking distance, helpful folks at the front desk and the building will fit ‘charming but well-appointed’.

    • SoCalAtty :

      We stayed at the Piazza di Spagna Prestige, in the Suite Colosseo. Love it! The manager, Valentina, is fantastic and gives you a map and marks places to eat when you check in. She’s really great and knowledgeable, and has a little puppy that hangs out in the lobby with her (Alto…he’s ADORABLE). It is near the subway and easy to get a taxi, and near all of the “fun” shops – Gucci, a La Perla – we had a lot of fun there.

      If you end up there, definitely tell Valentina hello for us! feel free to email me at meyerlemony at g m a i l dot com.

    • I was in Rome in September, and my bf and I stayed at the Duke Hotel and LOVED it. Absolutely can’t recommend highly enough– it was reasonably priced (we booked either through Hotels-dot-com or Expedia, can’t remember), the staff was very polite and friendly, and the hotel and rooms are very nice (ours was actually on the larger side compared to where we stayed in other parts of Italy). It’s not in the city center– it’s bordering on Villa Borghese, the large gardens / park complex, so you can either walk through the park to get to the closest Metro stop or do what we did and take the complimentary shuttle, which will drop you off in Piazza del Popolo and bring you back to the hotel. Also, the breakfast buffet was AWESOME– such that we didn’t eat lunch the first two days we stayed there. Enjoy your trip!

    • Thanks for the suggestions!!

  20. Mountain Girl :

    Urgent Threadjack help: One of the managers that reports to me had a parent die this morning. I need to notify the rest of my staff via email but need help with the wording. I need to get this out ASAP. Thanks in advance for your help.

    • “It is with deep sorrow that I announce the passing of ——- ———-, beloved parent of ————–. I know our hearts go out to manager and his family at this difficult time.”

      If there is info for funeral arrangements/condolence cards, inc. that. If you will be getting that in the future, say that you will provide such information when it becomes available.

      • Oh and I would title it something like Bereavement Notice. For a while, at work, we used to get emails titled “Death Announcement” and it was really jarring to see that pop up in big bold letters as I was working.

    • our firm sends out an email that says, “We are saddened to inform you of the passing of XXX, [relative] of YYY.” Subject line is just YYY. If people are invited to the funeral or to make donations, add that afterward. Don’t mention how long YYY will be out, cause of death, etc.

      • I like “saddened” much better than the “deep sorrow” I used.

      • Really? I suggested she indicate how long the person will be out so no one will bother the person until then. Why do you think she shouldn’t give this information? (Not challenging you; just curious whether I missed something).

        • That information is generally on a need-to-know basis for the direct reports I would think

        • Agreed–should be need-to-know basis. Also, it may give the appearance that folks are watching the clock on how long he/she will be away. Knowing time away is practical, but it is really tacky to position in the same announcement.

        • Also because if you are sending out a notice a day or two after someone has lost a parent, that person may not know yet how much time s/he will need, and you don’t want to push them so you can give an arbitrary return date in a mass email

    • Team:

      I am very sorry to tell you that John Doe’s mother died this morning. (Insert cause of death or other details here if you think John would want you to share with his co-workers). He will be out for the rest of the week. If any questions arise this week for him, please direct them to me. Company will be sending a flower arrangement to the funeral from all of us. (Insert visitation/funeral/memorial service details here if they will be taking place in your city and John has informed you of them).

    • Has the person asked you to inform the staff that they had a parent die? If not, I’d err on the side of caution and write something like “[Manager] will be absent for the next [several days/until further notice/specific time frame if he or she provided one] due to a family emergency. Until then, please work with/submit your reports to Other Manager who will be handling Projects X and Y until he/she returns.”

    • Did the manager ask you to send a note? I am a very private person and would be mortified and upset if my boss sent a note to the team that said anything beyond I’m out of the office dealing with a family emergency. Just another POV.

    • Mountain Girl :

      Thanks everybody for your help. And, yes, she did ask if we would let everybody know.

  21. This is absolutely a tangent, but does anyone else get upset about the price of a haircut for women? My husband can go to the corner barber and get out of there for under 20$, including tip. But any place near me that even does women’s haircuts starts at $70. As a kid, I grew up getting my hair cut by my mom, with something like Supercuts as a “splurge,” so I understand that I may have a strange idea of what a haircut should cost. But my hairstyle isn’t that hard to do, and I don’t really like the “salon experience” – shouldn’t I be able to get a shampoo and haircut for under $40? I know that I’m hopelessly frugal, but I just can’t bring myself to drop $100 on a trim.

    If any of you DC ladies have a suggestion for where I could go that will do a decent job for a reasonable price with no fancy “salon extras,” I would be much obliged.

    • One thing to keep in mind is frequency of cuts. My boyfriend can get in-and-out for under $20, but he needs a monthly cut. Mine is $75 and I only go 2-3 times a year. It ends up being fairly equal on an annual basis.

    • Kerrycontrary :

      I go to Kindle and Boom in Rockville. I think my cut is $65 (depends on the stylist-I go to Jenny B). I’ve never had an issue there.

    • If all you want is a trim, why don’t you just go to supercuts?

      • It’s kind of far away. By the time I pay for and take the metro, it will be slightly less expensive but take a much longer amount of time. I’m weighting the options.

    • I went to a local beauty school when I first graduated from law school for about ten dollars. They did a simple, even cut bob for me. I even had money left over for them to do a pedicure.

    • Not really. I do think haircuts should be based on difficulty of style rather than gender* and that if a woman wants a buzz cut she should be paying only as much as a man for a buzz cut, but I’m not upset that my haircut (which is layered and cut with a specific look in mind) costs more than just taking a few inches off or a typical man’s haircut.

      *However, I can see why they don’t.

      • wintergreen126 :

        I know that Massachusetts doesn’t allow gender based pricing. Prices have to be based on length and difficulty.

    • If all you need is a trim, I’d say try VSL in Dupont. Only $35. They do a good job when you tell them exactly what to do, but I wouldn’t go there if you need someone to give you advice on a new look or if you want a drastic change.

    • Are there any beauty schools in DC? You can ask to have a trainee who is very close to graduating.

      • There’s an Aveda in Gallery Place. I have not been there, but maybe others can comment.

        • Several of my friends went here as college students and recent grads. As long as you’re specific and are going for a simple cut, it’s a great deal.

          • That’s an awesome suggestion, and very close to me! I might have to try that out. I’ve never gone to a beauty school for a cut, but am totally willing to be a haircut test-subject if I get a good deal. Thanks for the rec!

          • If you go, please report back!

          • Will do!

          • Meg Murry :

            I went to a beauty school for cuts and color a few times in college, and while it was cheap, the student cutting my hair was going very slowly and meticulously and had to wait for her instructor to check her work often. I took in a picture (of myself, after a recent fresh cut) and she pretty much nailed the front, but didn’t do quite as good of a job in the back without photo guidance. But overall it was an ok cut, it just took a lot longer than a salon cut.

    • Silvercurls :

      About 9 years ago I got tired of paying salon prices and–after asking a stranger who had my kind of hair (yes, I was desperate)–I found the Hair Cuttery in the Wheaton Mall (formal title is something enormous along the lines of “Westtown Shoppingtown Wheaton,” so I stick with the local moniker). At present they charge $16 for haircut & shampoo. Even with a generous-percentage tip, it’s still less than $25. Because stylists and clients come from all over the world the staff is experienced and skilled in working with all types of hair. I am almost always very happy with the work of any stylist there. (I have never tried any other Hair Cuttery stores, so ymmv if you pick a different location.)

      The Wheaton store is open 7 days a week and you don’t need an appointment. The mall is within walking distance of the Wheaton Metro Station and also has ample parking. I’ve heard some people express uneasiness about going to this area at night. It’s been at least 2 years since I’ve heard of anything happening at this mall (there was a shooting–non-fatal–that was gang-related); my take is to drive if I go at night, and just use the usual big-city carefulness about trying not to be the only person out in the parking area around mall-closing time. I would recommend limiting your pedestrian experience to daylight hours.

      • Kerrycontrary :

        I live not too far from the wheaton mall and I probably wouldn’t walk there at night, but one time I had to exchange something and driving was ok. I just parked really close to the store and was very aware in the parking lot.

    • As a former hairdresser, the other thing I’d say is I would book an average of 15-20 minutes for a men’s cut, and an hour for a women’s cut. The few female clients I had with short, simple cuts like a man’s who also took 15-20 minutes got charged the same as the men do.
      You’re not just paying for what falls off the end of the stylist’s scissors, you’re paying for their time. A lot of women *think* that their cut and style is just as simple as a man’s, but if you’re there more than 20 minutes, it isn’t. (*maybe* in a really high end salon a man will take 30. But those salons charge men more, too.)

      • Silvercurls :

        Good to know. The quick in/out treatment sounds like a fair deal for any customer who is loyal but not going to expand sales by purchasing additional services or beauty supplies.

        • I have very short hair, and my hairdresser charges me children’s rates, because it simply doesn’t take very long, but I come regularly. I’m happy with that – I’ve changed salons over prices before.

    • Anonymous :

      Bang salon at verizon center does a $49 cut which isn’t under 40 but I always think comes out very good

    • I love Jamie at Bang on 15th Street. About $40 for just a cut and she is great at not pushing extras.

  22. hoola hoopa :

    I started reading Lean In over the weekend. I’m not too far into it, but am so far doing a lot of head nodding.

    Anyone else?

    • AnonInfinity :

      I loved it. I finished it over the weekend. Lots of good stuff in there to discuss…

    • I started it, too, and am feeling pretty much in agreement so far. I don’t think I’ve gotten into anything really meaty yet, though.

      I was interested in reading her family history – her grandmother’s and mother’s relationship with career orientation growing up compared to her own. SS is about 11 years older than me and about 11 years younger than my mother, but it seems sort of surprising how much I felt like she and I had shared experiences (in terms of the attitudes towards careers and gender growing up), while my mother would likely identify much more with her mother.

      • Oh, and I thought that she addressed a lot of the criticism that I’ve seen thrown at the book over and over again. Which strengthens my theory that most people criticising were just polishing their own biases, not critically thinking at all about anything she said.

        • mintberrycrunch :

          I’m also reading it and this is something that really stuck out to me. I feel like she has directly addressed most (if not all) of the criticisms that I read prior to the book coming out. It was refreshing and I am really enjoying the book.

          • hoola hoopa :

            I also felt the same way.

          • Agree. I think she especially, explicitly addresses the criticism that it’s a book by a successful, powerful, rich woman aimed at other (soon-to-be) successful, powerful, rich women. She has no knowledge of what it’s like to be working two jobs at $8/hr with no benefits trying to raise three kids on SNAP. So this book isn’t about that. Because she’s not at all qualified to talk about that. Which is why she explicitly doesn’t talk about that.

        • AnonInfinity :

          I also think that many people who are criticizing the book haven’t actually read it. (This theory is confirmed by the head-on attacks on some of the critiques.)

    • AnonInfinity :

      I finished it this weekend. Loved it. I am asking everyone I know whether they’ve read it in an attempt to discuss.

    • I read it. The “seat at the table” chapter didn’t resonnate at all with me, but I suspect it will with other women (NGDGTCO didn’t resonnate at all with me, either). (As an aside, I’m not a fan of the Treasury staffer story as the key example. In DC, there’s an etiquette to staffing people. If these ladies weren’t terribly senior, and they probably weren’t, sitting along the wall is WHERE YOU SIT. Silicon Valley and DC have vastly different cultures and she shouldn’t have presumed to know better than these women where it was appropriate, in their work culture, for them to sit.) But the “nice vs sucessful” chapter resonnated HUGELY with me. In my first job out of college, my boss called me “the Dragon Lady.” This was after I was promoted to a newly created supervisor position, that was there because the junior staff had been unruly, hadn’t had proper training, and hadn’t consistently met deadlines. I was made the supervisor of the rest of the team to create a training program and rein in some of the “I’m 22 and I’m crazy” tendencies of the younger staff. When I explained my program, which included regular check-ins and a series of performance metrics, to my boss, he said “whoah, Dragon Lady!” I asked if he’d thought the program should be run differently and he said, no, no it was perfect. So, um, you wanted someone to provide better oversight, I create a program to provide this oversight, you like the program, but you call me “Dragon Lady”? Huh? My husband wonders why being called a b—ch never really fazes me. I just got used to it from really, really early on. I could never have gotten anywhere if I wasn’t willing to have some people think I was a giant b—ch. So, yeah, some serious head-nodding there.

    • Finished it last night. Agreed with most of it. Didn’t think there was anything particularly ground-breaking or controversial about it. Or really any new advice. But it has sparked a lot of dialog, which is valuable by itself.

      • hoola hoopa :

        Haven’t gotten far enough for me to call it, but I have the sense that there may not be any dramatic new ideas for me either. At the same time, though, I think I’m reading it more for motivation than new ideas and it is making me feel motivated.

        I thought it was novel that she said she was (partly) writing it for men to read. Seems all or nearly all the breaking the glass ceiling discussion is handled internally by women addressing women, like the menstruation break-out talk in grade school. If men are addressed, it’s as perpetrator rather than partner. I feel like the tone of the book (so far) could appeal to male audience better than other media on the topic.

        • hoola hoopa :

          I don’t mean to imply that women-only discussions are not valuable – they absolutely are! – but I did find the explicit inclusion of men as an intended audience refreshing.

      • Maureen Corrigan :

        Still have yet to actually read the book but I heard Maureen Corrigan’s review on Fresh Air and her biggest complaint about the book was that it was really dull and didn’t really present any compelling arguments.

    • Divaliscious11 :

      Me too. Intended to get further but was catching up on the Borgias…..

  23. Chilly attorney in the snowy midwest :


    I’m wearing a great Ann Taylor boiled wool jacket with a little peplum design at the waist today. Unfortunately, it’s not wearing well and will need to be replaced sooner rather than later. I love the warmth of boiled wool, but most are so boxy. Anyone have suggestions for boiled wool jackets that are a little more fitted & feminine? And last longer than a few months?

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