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weight tracking app
Can anyone recommend an app for tracking weight loss? I want what I could easily do with an excel spreadsheet, but in app form. I’m again trying to lose about 30 lbs of post-babies weight and think seeing the 1-2 lb/wk losses graphically will help me psychologically, since it always feels to me like a hopeless drop in the bucket.
I’m not looking for an app that can also log food and activity – past experience tells me I won’t use them, although I am minding my food and activity – so it’s okay if the app also has them but I’ll want to easily ignore those features.
Jessica F. Walker \\ Millennial Life Skills Coach
I really like Myfitnesspal for tracking weight, exercise and food. They even have options to track water, and will connect to pretty much any app or device you got. Its really powerful and its free!
The other one, which isn’t quite intuitive enough is LoseIt!. It does a lot of the same things, but I feel like it’s bulky and hard to use.
Good luck!
Anon
Congrats, this comment is decidedly less tone deaf than your last one.
Sloan Sabbith
Snort.
Senior Attorney
Way more profesh! ;)
Senior Attorney
Way more profesh! ;)
TO Lawyer
Do you have an iPhone? You can track your weight in the Health App.
Otherwise I use myfitnesspal, and while I am tracking food, it also graphs my weight which is helpful.
weight tracking app
I am using an iphone (poorly, haha) and didn’t know about a health app.
RR
I like Lose It, which I use as an app on my iPhone. Tracking food is very easy, and it will graph other goals.
GirlFriday
+3 for Myfitnesspal – easy and helpful!
numbersmouse
If you have an Android phone, the Google Fit app has this function (just tap the little + in the lower right corner).
Jen
I started thinking of track food but…too lazy. I only log my weight once a week. App is called MyNetDiary. I too am tracking loss of baby weight…
anon
I love the trendweight website. I find it helpful that it calculates the trend of your weight over time. So, if you for example get your period and have 2 pounds of bloat for 2-3 days, you don’t have to feel defeated because the algorithm takes that into account and you can still see your line going down. The only thing is you have to import your weight data through either Fitbit or a smart scale or something -I just enter mine manually into the fitbit app/website. A bit of a pain but worth it for the vastly superior display.
weight tracking app
This sounds perfect! I’d also have to enter manually, but it may be worth it for the trends. My disorganized tracking has definitely showed fluctuation by cycle.
Anonymous
For iOS, an app that does similar trend line smoothing is happy scale. I love it
Teeks
Happy Scale!
Anon
I really like SparkPeople – it lets you track your weight and calories. They also have this HUGE user-created database of foods that are already entered (you should double check, but most are correct).
IVF woes
Looking for insight on how to handle the time commitments and unpredictable nature of IVF. We just had our first egg retrieval, which was incredibly disappointing in yield. I am lucky that I was able to juggle work today and had no client meetings scheduled. It looks like we will try several more rounds, and each time we won’t know until 2 days prior when it will be. It is not realistic to cancel all meetings in the week when a potential procedure could be scheduled, and in my work we schedule things at least 3-4 weeks out so there is little chance I can predict when the procedure will be that far ahead of time…. What do you do?? Help and commiseration needed.
anon
You’ll cancel the required number of meetings whenever you do know for sure, even if that isn’t “ideal”. You say you got sick, or had to schedule a minor but necessary medical procedure that suddenly popped up. You’re allowed to be human, even if it occasionally causes some inconvenience.
RR
It sucks, but it will be fine. My first IVF ended up in an almost worst-case scenario. I was second chair in a jury trial that went a week longer than it was supposed to, and my cycle ended up faster than we had anticipated. We had one day a week off from trial for criminal docket, and I tried to schedule it then but couldn’t. It had to be a day we were in trial because of follicle growth. So, I was faced with losing the entire $14,000 round or coming late to trial one day. I told the judge that I had a minor medical procedure that couldn’t be moved and would need to be late, and trial went on without me that morning. My RE scheduled me for the earliest appointment, and I skipped the Valium and the sedation and just did a local anesthetic. They loaded me up on coffee in the recovery room, and my husband drove me to court where I argued against the dismissal motion and cross-examined a witness while trying to stand very still.
All that to say, your scheduling will probably not be that crazy, and I was even able to make that craziness work. I will say that my boss (who was first chair to my second chair) knew what was going on. So, if you have that kind of relationship, consider sharing a little. It helped that he got it. But, it’s a blip in your life–in a long career and a long parenting path. It feels like it’s difficult in the moment–it is difficult in the moment–but it will be fine.
Anonymous
And made for a great story that makes you sound like a total bad-ass :)
RR
Thank you, but I really think anyone would have been the same level of bad-ass in that situation! You’ve been through too much at that point to not see it through.
June
Wow! I am so impressed! Not to be cheesy, but this story is a huge inspiration.
Calico
Agreed!
RR
That’s very sweet. It was a long time ago. The product(s) of that IVF are now 9, and a later IVF brought me a third child. There is a light at the end of the tunnel when all the insanity of IVF is just a story in the mix of all the thousands of stories about your kids.
You are a badass!
Wow! You are a badass.
Amy
What a great story. I think it’s so important for women who have gone through fertility challenges to share their experiences.
I had my IUI on a day when we had a major presentation in my department. There was no choice; my follicles were ready and I had had to trigger the day before. I hadn’t told my boss about going through fertility treatment (he wouldn’t have been sympathetic). I was supposed to go home and rest after the IUI; instead I went and stood for two hours presenting, and then worked through the rest of the workday. It was not ideal. Fortunately, that was the Wednesday of Thanksgiving week – we told our families we were “opting out of Thanksgiving this year” (they did know we were going through treatment) and I was able to stay home and sleep/rest for four days. Two weeks later, I tested positive and the result of that IUI cycle is now 10 years old.
I can’t echo enough that this is a “blip” in your life. I remember what we went through – it was two years of trying and I was on fertility meds for 6 months; the IUI was our last-ditch attempt before going to IVF. I hardly ever think about it now. You will absolutely do what you have to do to get done what needs to get done. By the time we had our IUI, I was so sick of thinking about getting pregnant I would have stabbed myself with a fork just to be able to stop the whole thing. The massive doses of hormones certainly don’t help. It is extremely tough but it is all worth it in the end. I hardly ever even think about that time now, but when I look at my son, I am certainly glad I did it. Hugs.
Anon For This
No advice, but complete and total commiseration. I keep telling myself that somewhere down the road, this whole f- ing process will make us stronger. Best of luck to yuo.
Ms B
BTDT. Do what you need to do in terms of rescheduling or cancelling. Keep in mind that if you keep close-lipped about your IVF at work, no one will have any idea. My office really did not know that I had done IVF until after the hubs and I traveled for our adoption and someone asked why we didn’t do it . . . and I advised that we had done a round, and gotten pregnant, and miscarried, and that I had not felt the need to share at the time.
Best of luck and keep in mind that this is not your only option, so keep your spirits up!
Anon
Vicarious shopping help please!
My husband and I will be celebrating my 29th birthday next month with a fancy dinner at a Michelin starred restaurant in Southern California. As a birthday gift to myself, I’d like to buy a new dress to wear to dinner. No Rent The Runway, please – I’m actually looking to purchase something (since I rent from them all the time, I realized I haven’t bought a new cocktail dress in years, and I could use one good go-to option in my closet). If it helps, I’m 5’7″ and on the slender side but with a bit of an hourglass figure (I’ve definitely got hips and a butt!). Budget is roughly $250.
emeralds
Colors? Style preferences?
Anon
No real color preferences – just nothing super bright. I’d like it to be something I could wear to the occasional weddings/cocktail party/etc.
I typically find A-line styles or anything that accentuates a small waist and is more forgiving in the hips most flattering. Sheath dresses are a challenge for me, but I do occasionally find some that fit. I also feel like 29 is a weird in-between age for dressing – I don’t want to look like I’m a 23-year old ready for a night out, but I also don’t want to age myself prematurely.
Helen G
You are at a perfect age. You are right not to dress like a teenager. Yesterday I walked passed some teenagers and the dresses were so short that when one leaned over to get something from a shelf, I could see her coochie. I was floored that her mom would let her wear a dress like that, and I’m sure she did not know that her daughter had no panties on. There needs to be a morals commuppins with her family or she will be an unwitting mommy before long.
Anonymous
I’ve been thinking about this. If a young male dressed so that when he moved in a certain way, his whole uncovered package was exposed, I think it would cause quite an uproar. Words such as pervert, exhibitionist, flasher, sexual offender would get tossed around. He might even get arrested. No matter how good looking he was, his behavior would not be tolerated.
So why is it that a young female can get away with this? While her behavior would get tsk, tsked, it is highly unlikely that it would cause the furor the same behavior would cause if the “perpetrator” were a male.
numbersmouse
No recommendations, but happy early birthday! I’m turning 28 next month. :)
Anon
Thank you! Happy birthday to you as well!
Anonymous
Following with interest.
Since it’s a restaurant with yummy food, you’re going to want to eat. If this had a dress version, this is what I’d wear: https://www.toryburch.com/tory-tunic/34555.html?dwvar_34555_color=963&cgid=clothing-tunics&start=1
Anon
A dress with some room to eat is definitely a good idea!
a millenial
do you have other events you want to be able to wear this to? what kind of look are you going for? i think ted baker dresses are beautiful and amazing.
http://www.tedbaker.com/row/Womens/Sale/Clothing/Dresses/DOLLII-Embroidered-mesh-detail-skater-dress-Black/p/131072-00-BLACK?plpSlots=1
Anon
I don’t have any other events immediately on the calendar, but my husband and I do a fancy dinner roughly 2x per year, and it would be nice to re-wear this dress to weddings or dressier events.
That Ted Baker dress is pretty! I have never ordered from them before, but I will definitely check out their options.
Meg March
Looooove Ted Baker. They always have some really pretty “seasonless” florals (aka florals that don’t look like you can only wear them in spring).
Meg March
I like these ones a lot:
http://www.tedbaker.com/row/Womens/Clothing/Dresses/NERSI-Blushing-Bouquet-Bardot-dress-Navy/p/132244-NAVY?plpSlots=1
http://www.tedbaker.com/row/Womens/Clothing/Dresses/VIANNA-Lost-Gardens-A-line-dress-Black/p/131234-BLACK?plpSlots=1
http://www.tedbaker.com/row/Womens/Sale/Clothing/Dresses/CARSER-Fan-Ombre-midi-dress-Black/p/133724-BLACK?plpSlots=1
Sydney Bristow
In my head this was Ted Baker, but I think I came across it when looking at Ted Baker dresses one day. I wish I had reason to buy this (and could fit in it!). It’s Dress the Population. http://m.shop.nordstrom.com/s/dress-the-population-lucy-embroidered-midi-dress/4430220
Delta Dawn
I am obsessed with this Asos dress but have zero need for it. I also think the neckline may be a bit too low. But I looooove it.
http://us.asos.com/asos/asos-lace-cape-midi-dress/prd/7273136?iid=7273136&affid=14174&channelref=product%20search&mk=abc¤cyid=2&gclid=Cj0KEQiAh4fEBRCZhriIjLfArrQBEiQArzzDAUrh2WbnDk1JfsL-kcUJb5Kh7tpFL-l8ZQVWzMamrMIaAvqS8P8HAQ
Ms B
That is beautiful but, alas, clearly not something that will work on those of us large in the bust.
Susan
I don’t know if this is your style, but this Helmut Lang dress is my go-to. It’s incredibly flattering, hides a food belly well, is simple but can have tiny edge to it, depending on the shoes I wear. I love it. It’s an old style, but the label often has similar styles. (Also, I live in LA and have worn this to lots of different places and always felt perfectly dressed.)
http://www.neimanmarcus.com/Helmut-Lang-Solar-Drape-Wrap-Dress/prod159660214/p.prod
Anon
Oooh, I like that! Will check out Helmut Lang.
ChiLaw
Lately Tahari ASL has a series of dresses with portrait collars, some in cocktail-y fabrics and lengths. I want one.
numbersmouse
Was that small sidebar with the social media links always there? It’s really annoying on my small laptop screen and makes it hard to see what I’m typing.
Sloan Sabbith
No, it’s new and it’s super annoying. I understand wanting to get a wider audience, but I keep hitting the options on accident on my phone.
Anonymous
No, even now that it’s resized to be smaller, it still gets in the way. I wish it was at least on the right side of the screen, if it must be present.
numbersmouse
Yeah, that would work much better.
Wendy
+1
CountC
+1
Coffee Date Into More?
Is there a way to make a coffee during the workday with a somewhat-colleague into an actual date without being unprofessional?
Meeting with a guy- asked him if he would like to grab coffee, he said he would love to; we’re in the same general practice area, but in different fields (I’m in law, he’s in government policy; we do not work in the same office, organization, etc). I didn’t give a reason why, just asked. I haven’t spent much time with him 1-on-1, but the time I have spent I’ve really enjoyed talking to him. He’s attractive and smart. We exchanged emails to set it up with a fair amount of joking, but always professional- nothing outwardly flirty.
Any tips?
Anonymous
I think you are over-thinking this. He doesn’t seem to be a somewhat-colleague at all. Yeh maybe you’ll run into him once in a blue moon at networking events? But it doesn’t seem like you actually work together at all. Just set a time next week and see where it goes.
Coffee Date Into More?
Thanks, that helps. It’s a little bit messy with some stuff I didn’t mention, but hopefully you’re right.
I also need to figure out if he’s single and straight. Ahem. Fact finding mission….
anon
Can you schedule an after-work happy hour meetup instead? Much more date-like
Brunette Elle Woods
I agree. Lunch or coffee is more professional while happy hour drinks can go either way.
Monday
If you’ve been emailing so far, ask for his number at the end of the coffee? Or just give him yours? That will at least signal it’s social and you’d like to take it further.
Anonymous
I went on a lunch date with a sort of colleague recently and at the end he just said something like, “I’ve really enjoyed this, would you like to have dinner sometime?” You could try that or if you’re like me and prefer the man to make the first move, you could just say “I’ve really enjoyed this” and see what he does.
Coffee Date Into More?
I’ll try this if I like how it goes. :) I’m excited, I like him a lot even if it doesn’t turn into something.
asdf
Consider amending “I’ve really enjoyed this’ with ‘I’d love to do it again sometime’ depending on how brave/ forward you’re feeling.
Anonymous
It sounds like it’s a date already to me.
Coffee Date Into More?
You and my mother and grandmother. :P It might be, I just have no idea how he read my invitation.
Blonde Lawyer
I will keep this innocent exchange in mind next time I think I’m out for networking coffee and the guy thinks it’s a date. I’ll assume good intentions!
Anonna
I’d play it cool and maintain the current level of friendly/flirty, then sit back and wait to see if he escalates it by going in for a hug or kiss at the end or asks you out on a real date.
January
I’d actually go for a middle ground, if you’re trying to encourage flirty intentions. Hold eye contact for just a smidge longer than you would otherwise, make sure to lean in during conversations… it’s subtle enough you can drop it without saying a thing if you learn in the course of the conversation that he’s not available/interested. And if he is interested, a little subtle flirting is more likely to encourage a hug/kiss at the end of it.
Anonymous
All – any recs for coaches/training sessions who can help improve my communication skills and body language? If I’m well rehearsed, I’m ok, but if I’m caught off-guard, I tend to stammer and I lose my confidence. I’m at a disadvantage at my job because this is something I need to really improve. I work in Finance/Banking and good communication skills are highly valued here. I’m based out of NYC. Also, read several books etc. and they seem to help but I’m not there yet.
anne-on
Have you thought about asking your firm to bring in a PR team/comms pros for media training? I used to do a lot of it for our senior partners and it can range from focusing on messaging, to focusing on presentation/comms style. I would absolutely see this as a huge plus for a lot of staff – plus CPE is always offered when we do them. Practically every PR firm in NYC offers trainers, but not sure what or if they’d do a 1:1 non-professional client.
It was also standard at our manager training sessions and very well received.
CHL
Toastmasters is good for this! Do you have any other opportunities to “practice” like an alumni group presentation or something like that?
APC
This is more outside the box but would you be open to doing an Improv class? It can help you think on your feet, have confidence, etc., but without the pressure of everything being professional.
Marketer
Check out Vanessa Van Edwards from the “Science of People” blog. She has several videos and blog posts about various communication disciplines, including public speaking and body language. She also offers online and in-person classes, so it might be a good fit.
There’s also a company named Duarte that offers speaker coaching. Full disclosure, I used to work for them, but the recommendation stands. They come out to NY pretty frequently, and they’ve got some really good material to help improve your public speaking skills. Their format is usually in a small group setting. The course is called “Captivate”, and you can find it on their website.
Finally, I have another contact that does 1:1 speaker coaching for a bunch of execs in various fields, so if you’re interested in that, look up Bob Scirpo on Linkedin and send him a note. My contact is based in the Bay Area, but I know they travel all over the world, so they are on the East Coast pretty frequently.
PEN
Has anyone used the Rise nutrition program? I am intrigued but would love to hear any personal experience before signing up. Thanks!
kk
I’m maybe ten days in, and lukewarm. On the one hand, it’s great to feel accountable to someone. On the other hand, as a relatively well-read and well informed person, I dont always agree with the ‘grades’ that my meals receive- for example, after my coach kept telling me to eat more protein in the morning, I had leftover steak, and got a mediocre score because “too much red meat is discouraged”
Anonymous
there are tons of sources of protein that are not red meat, and are so much healthier for you (and more typical breakfast foods, too). I don’t think their advice is contradictory at all.
Bacon Anon
Yeah – you should have totally done bacon :)
If you tell someone to eat protein, but then don’t tell them there are types of protein that are discouraged at the time you make that advice., that’s not helpful advice.
Anonymous
Yeah I think most breakfast meats (bacon, sausage, Canadian bacon, etc) are much worse for you than lean steak. Eggs are good, but then they should tell you specifically to eat eggs.
kk
I’d love to hear if you have a good slogan for a sign for marching tomorrow!
I’m still thinking about ‘this protest is patriotic’ or ‘liberty and justice for ALL’
So far, it just made me happy to see so many women buying CVS out of posterboard!
Marching
I’m thinking about writing “I’m With Her” and then arrows in all directions. I saw it at one of the links Kat posted earlier today.
Anonymous
The Handmaid’s Tale is not an instruction manual.
Girls Just Wanna Have FUNding for Planned Parenthood.
Keep Your Tiny Hands off my Rights.
When There are Nine – RBG
I’m with Her + drawing of Statute of Liberty or Lady Justice
We cannot succeed when half of us are held back – MalalaYousafzai
Anonymous
Another take on that second one: Girls Just Wanna Have FUNdamental Rights
Anokha
I think I’m going with Nasty Women Unite. Not super original — but I think it gets the point across.
AEK
To add to the third one (which I love): “…and off my p*ssy”
S in Chicago
Google “signs for women’s march” and you’ll get some great printable options.
(See you in Chicago tomorrow my fellow Midwest ‘rettes!)
Moonstone
I’ll be there. Look for “Don’t turn back the clock.”
pugsnbourbon
I bought a five-pack of posterboard last night. I like the “I’m with Her” and arrows!
I am going to do Liberty, Equality, Sisterhood and P@ssy Grabs Back.
Anonymous
our rights don’t threaten yours
civil rights are human rights
my rights are not up for debate
Senior Attorney
Not necessarily for the march tomorrow, but my favorite one from this morning was “I’m Not Usually a Sign Guy, But Geez!”
Anonymous
Follow-up to the comments this morning on Kellyanne Conway’s outfit:
A friend posted on Facebook today that it looked like she raided Tracy Partridge’s closet; I did a spit-take. (Those of you who are under a certain age will have to google images of the Partridge Family.)
Anonymous
Don’t y’all think making fun of her outfit is really catty and not exactly the go women mindsight we should have? No one is going to make fun of a guys black suit. This is an area where only women can suffer. I just find it really grating to hear women make fun of other women like this.
Anon
+1
Anonymous
It’s literally a fashion blog for women where this is constant discussion about the outfits of public figures – what we like or dislike about what Michelle Obama, HRC, Kate Middleton and tons of others wore. Lots of people wrote nice things about Melania’s coat.
As for Conway, it’s an awful coat and if we were going to be extra nice to anyone, it certainly wouldn’t be a women who actively and vocally supports policies that are horrible for women.
Anonymous
There’s a difference obviously between saying what you like Obama’s outfit or Melanie’s outfit and downright mean girling Conway. You can say something real like it’s not appropriate but it is 100% appropriate so you’re just making fun of her taste. So middle school.
Anonymous
So we should only comment when we like clothes and never make fun of outfits that we don’t like?
Also, “No one is going to make fun of a guys black suit” is not at all true. Everyone makes fun of Trump’s suits – like the entire Internet.
PrettyPrimadonna
Thank you for that second point, Anonymous at 3:27. I make fun of men’s suits all the time.
Anonymous
Okay, everyone has given the one example of Trump. But you obviously have to admit that this is much more of a minefield for women than men.
Jax
Example of fashion talk: “That outfit looks like a costume.”
Example of “meangirling”: “That outfit looks like a costume. She’s too fat/too thin/too *insert body shame here* to pull that off. She’s so dumb/blonde/*insert personality insult here* and that outfit proves it.”
The minute the talk turns from the outfit to THE PERSON, that’s when it gets ugly and is meangirling.
Anonymous
Would you say it to her face? Would you say it about your best friend?
Anonymous
Of course I’d say it to her face. People were commenting this morning how she needs better friends who would be honest with her about what a bad look it is.
Anonymous
@ Anon at 4:30, actually yes, if my best friend bought a coat this hideous for an important event I would tell her it’s horrendous. Possibly in a slightly more gentle way, but I love my BFF and I don’t know or particularly like KAC as a person so I don’t feel like I need to sugarcoat the message as much.
Torin
For example, friends telling other friends their clothing choices are suspect in popular culture:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cuu5ppL0b4Q
Torin
+1
OP’s comment wasn’t at all nasty or out of line. It’s an ugly coat. This comment was pretty gentle teasing.
Also anon @ 3:16 what do you mean “No one is going to make fun of a guys black suit”? Where were you yesterday when people were literally making fun of Trump for dressing badly _all the time_?
Anonymous
We also talk (endlessly) about what constitutes professional dress. And for a high-profile event like this, this particular coat/outfit came across as costume rather than professional for the occasion. A bid for personal attention (which is why I assume she did it) on a day that isn’t about her.
AEK
Actually I totally make fun of Trump’s suit. His ridiculous, unbuttoned, clown-tie suit.
Also, when you wear an attention-grabbing outfit, you get attention. Positive and negative.
AEK
Oh, and if you are the mouthpiece for a populist president who is going to uplift ALL Americans, why are you wearing a $4000 Gucci coat? Are the poor & downtrodden supposed to think, “Oooh, that will be me someday under our president”?!
Torin
It was four thousand freaking dollars?! Are you serious!?
Bacon Anon
Lands End had a cheaper version that I like better.
http://www.landsend.com/products/womens-independence-coat/id_301740?brandCode=classic&cm_re=lec-_-lp-_-sb2-1-2-_-wmindependencecoat-_-20160701-_-area
Anonymous
Oh give me a break. Obama was supposed to be for all people too and Michelle wore all sorts of expensive clothes.
Anonymous
I am now obsessed with those cat buttons though.
#Hailtothecatbuttons
Anonymous
Eh, she dressed in what is basically a costume. It’s not meangirling to comment on it.
Anonymous
I am fine with you commenting and saying you don’t think it’s appropriate for a serious occasion. It’s the downright mocking of it that makes me feel uncomfortable. I never had the right clothes growing up as a girl from a poor family, so I have just always been very uncomfortable with it.
Anonymous
Then you probably shouldn’t read this website. My first reaction when I saw her outfit (and Melania’s, and Ivanka’s) was that this is what happens when nouveau riche and trailer parks collide.
Newp
*eye roll*
Yes, Conway is being mocked because she is too poor and uncultured to know when something is tacky as sh*t. Try not to personalize everything; it’s a really self-centered way to live.
Torin
There’s a pretty large difference between children making fun of each other for being poor (which is basically what teasing the poor girl for not having the right clothes is) and adult women making fun of another adult woman for wearing an ugly $4000 costume coat.
Conway wore lots of more muted and perfectly nice looking outfits all over the news in the past year. She knows how to dress, and is usually a sharp, understated dresser. She chose to make a statement with this coat, and a lot of us happen to think the statement looks ridiculous. That’s not mean girling. It’s seriously just not.
Anonymous
Then I doubt you were buying $4,000 coats. Part of why people are mocking her are that she wasted so much money on something so hideous.
cbackson
For what it’s worth, Conway is the wife of a biglaw partner, so her fashion choices are not driven by financial needed.
Anonymous
Saying she looked like a member of the Partridge family is an astute observation. Maybe that’s what she’s going for instead of toy soldier.
Anonymous
Mean girling is being mean to other girls. That’s literally what this is. It just is.
Anonymama
The problem with that definition is that it reduces adult women to girls, and reduces any less than cordial interaction between adult women, whether substantive or not, to a ridiculous middle school disagreement. I mean, Elizabeth Warren may have been “mean” grilling Betsy DeVos about the Department of education but that certainly should not in any way be called mean-girling.
Anonymous
I disagree. It’s like when Bjork wore her swan dress, knowing that everyone was going to think it was bonkers and comment on it. Sorry you’ve had such a traumatic past, but people picking on your outfits when you were a teen is not even remotely the same type of situation here.
Torin
Now we’re getting into semantics but I don’t think that’s what that phrase means. At least in the movie it was the “in” crowd ganging up as a group on the powerless dweeb, and that’s what I’ve always understood the phrase to mean. I don’t think Kelly Ann Conway is a powerless dweeb. And as Jax pointed out above, everyone’s comments have been confined to the actual piece of clothing she chose to wear. No one has said anything about her body etc., which would indeed be inappropriate mean.
RR
I honestly feel like she did it on purpose. I mean, the coat literally has angry cat buttons. I really don’t like the woman, but I choose to think she’s making her own statement here.
Anonymous
I feel like she must have lost some sort of high stakes bet. Because this is inexplicable.
AnonZ
If that coat were posted on thissite, the comments section would be filled with jokes about it and also questions about Kat’s taste.
ELS
I don’t disagree necessarily, but: we have routinely commented on Trump’s wardrobe choices here and it hasn’t been positive.
Anonymous
I can’t decide if it’s the beginning of the Hunger Games or proof that they are, in fact, being blackmailed by Russia.
Anonymous
Maybe she was blackmailed into wearing that coat
Anonymous
“Wear cats to show you are with us or we’ll expose your secrets!”
Anonymous
I love you all.
Merci
Kisses
Anonymous
The Handmaid’s Tale is not an instruction manual.
Girls Just Wanna Have FUNding for Planned Parenthood.
Keep Your Tiny Hands off my Rights.
When There are Nine – RBG
I’m with Her + drawing of Statute of Liberty or Lady Justice
We cannot succeed when half of us are held back – MalalaYousafzai
Anonymous
response to kk above
Anon
Are people not watching the inauguration/lunch/parade/Obama departure today? Expected more commentary here. I mean I don’t like him but can’t not watch.
Anonymous
I found President Trump’s speech moving and powerful. A united America, where we take care of ourselves and our neighbors first, instead of special interests and the global elite. Wonderful. America first.
Anonymous
+1,000
PrettyPrimadonna
Are you serious or is this sarcasm? (not being snarky, I genuinely want to know…)
Bewitched
Gag. Did you not read the text of the speech where he suggested that POLITICIANS have been holding back the rank and file Americans? Politicians have been benefiting themselves financially while regular Americans suffer? That is such BS. Perhaps if you replace “Wealthy Businessmen” or “the 1%” in both of those statements it would be correct but it currently is as far from the truth as possible. After all, Democrats raised the minimum wage and the exempt pay classification and provided health care for more Americans than ever before-both of which benefited regular Americans. Republicans and wealthy businessmen (such as Trump) fought against these initiatives and many more. If anyone is part of the “global elite” which has harmed middle America, Trump is. He’s a hypocrite of the highest order (and I usually try to stay out of political discussions).
Anonymous
+1 million to “If anyone is part of the “global elite” which has harmed middle America, Trump is.”
It’s truly baffling to me how his supporters can’t see that he is the living embodiment of all they despise and does not care one bit about them, only about making himself wealthier and more famous and powerful.
Anonymous
Yes indeed. Because they have. The Democrats favored Wall Street and bankers. After the 2008 crash, exactly how many bankers went to jail? One. President Obama bailed out rich, greedy bankers with our money. The Democrats have played divisive, identity politics while they created a global, elite class who rules us with ambiguous fear. Millions of us are thrilled to see President Obama leave. He sold us out, and Hillary would have finished the job. America first.
Anon
I totally agree that more bankers should have been held accountable, but this is more due to the existing laws and the lack of the SEC’s backbone than the President. Also, he bailed out the auto industry, which would have had devastating affects otherwise.
Are not all political parties, particularly at the local level, a form of identity politics? And how does an American political party create a global elite class?
Bewitched
Agree. And by “bailed out the bankers”, did you mean safeguarded American bank deposits and put in place programs to protect Americans at risk of losing their homes to foreclosure? Obama did indeed use our money to do those two things.
Anonymous
+1
Just because he is the president doesn’t mean we need to kowtow to his abusive and deceitful rhetoric/actions.
Anonymous
LOL. He’s so against the elite he’s putting all these billionaires on his cabinet!
Sloan Sabbith
I found the whole focus on “eradicating” “radical Islamic terrorism” to be F**KING TERRIFYING. But you do you.
Or “national pride.” That’s when he reminded me of Hitler. It was a speech filled with undercurrents of threats and fear. F THAT.
Anonymous
Politicians are fear monger inn with “nationalist pride” and populism. That eay, they can hang out at Davos and figure out how to turn climate change into more money for themselves.
Anonymous
Oh man, no politician should ever utter the words national pride or be compared to Hitler!
Anonymous
I have no issue in eradicating the terrorists who killed my friends by flying airplanes into buildings while I watched on television. Eradicate away.
Anonymous
You know what I find terrifying? The idea that German women can no longer go out after dark, swim in community pools, or feel comfortable without wearing girdles that lock.
I’m terrified of how countries that utilize Sharia law to run things treat women and gay people.
I’m terrified by the terrorism we have seen in Orlando, San Bernadino and Boston. Radical Terrorism it was, unfortunately always a radical strain of Islam. To solve a big problem, you must first accept reality.
In-House Europe
Wait, whaaaaa???? I live in Germany and none of those statements are true. Not only do I and the German women here go out alone after dark, we do so without fear. We sunbathe topless at community pools and swim to our hearts content. As for locking girdles…I don’t even know what that is.
Feel free to go crazy on hating radical terrorists, I do too. But I associate them with Islam in the same way that I associate child molesting priests with Christianity. As in, some small subset will always use religion to advance their non-religious goals.
Anon2
He left the campaign trail to open a hotel and visit his golf course in Scotland. He is the global elite.
Anon2
Not watching any of it. I’ll turn my tv back on tomorrow. Not watching online either.
Anonymous
Everyone’s talking about Conway’s awful coat but check out the shoes. Like, what? Where can one even buy shoes that pointy in the last decade?
January
I didn’t watch. I did end up reading the speech. Didn’t love it, but I probably would have been more annoyed by it if I’d had to watch him deliver it.
In other news, a (very) conservative partner saw me trudging back to my office and said, “Look! You have a spring in your step! It’s the new president!” I am feeling sad today, for personal reasons as well as the inauguration, and couldn’t help myself, so I snapped back, “Now you’re just making stuff up, there’s no spring in my step.” I felt guilty, so when he stopped by to tell me there should be a spring in my step, I blamed my tiredness and the rainy weather. He recommended a hot chocolate packet mixed with coffee. Hopefully this was not too big of a misstep on my part.
Anonymous
I mean, I probably would have said “F*ck right off” so I think your response was pretty professional.
Anonymous
+1 He sounds like a doofus.
January
Well, on his way out, he told me to rest up and get that spring back in my step. I just said “will do” this time. Sigh.
Anonymous
Is he maybe hitting on you? At best, he seems overly solicitous, but at worst a little hyper-focused on your movements.
Senior Attorney
Jeebus. That’s worse than ordering you to smile…
Anonymous
His speech wasn’t an inaugural speech; it was appropriate for a campaign rally. I didn’t really feel that he “got” what a enormous task he has ahead of him for the next four years.
Wendy
I listened on the radio and also thought he had re-worked his campaign speeches into his inaugural address. Two things: First not surprisingly, no mention of climate change or the environment. I also wondered when it became the first and only priority of a government to create jobs? In Canada, we have a Trump clone running for the Conservative party saying much the same stuff.
Anonymous
Because if you don’t have a job and are worried about taking care of your family, the environment is not top of mind right this second? Since jobs matter to a lot of people who want to work? Perhaps you’ll feel differently when all the big law firms start hiring only in Mexico.
MB
Yea, but the reason a good number of jobs are being eliminated in the US is due to advances in technology. Manufacturing process change to become more efficient and cost-effective. That has always been the case. Times change and people must adapt. We should be working on the adapting part and doing a better job of training young people for the types of jobs that ARE out there, not threatening companies who are cutting costs (and thereby keeping the cost of goods lower/the same). Not everyone in this country is going to be able to buy American made all the time, some not ever.
ELS
@Anon at 9:51: Then Trump should lead the charge by bringing manufacture of his own products back to the United States. Because he sure hasn’t stepped down as head of his companies like he said he would, or like ethics lawyers of both parties say is necessary to avoid conflicts.
I don’t disagree that jobs are very important. I find it hilarious, though, that the party that is all about “job creators” is looking to the government for help.
S
I find the whole “be happy” thing so disgusting, especially when delivered by a man. I can’t put my finger on it, but there’s just something wrong with trying to tell someone how they should feel. Like women are supposed to be charming. I never hear a man being told to smile. I’m still fuming over some bagger at Whole Foods who told me to smile the other day. I wasn’t in a bad mood at all and was embarrassed and immediately started to joke with him to try to demonstrate that was the case. Kicked myself the whole way home. Who the hell is he to talk to me like that when I’m the customer and probably twice his a.ge, you know? And I’m usually a pretty happy person. I feel for people who aren’t smiling when there truly is something going on that is no one’s business but their own
Sydney Bristow
I can’t bring myself to watch. I did look up Kellyanne Conway’s outfit because of all the comments about it, but other than that I’ve been blocking it out.
Anonymous
Same.
Anonymous
Off today but not watching per Patton Oswalt’s great FB post. Love that the DC Metro tweeted the ridership comparison with 2013. It’s got to be killing Trump that like half as many people came.
Bacon Anon
Eh – he’ll have a whole story about how it was the Best Inauguration Ever. The guy doesn’t let reality get to him.
ELS
Ding ding. Alternative facts!
Jax
I’m watching. I really believe that the best thing we can all do is continue to be involved (and informed) but I also understand why many people *don’t* want to watch.
But since I’m watching, I know in real time that HRC ended up seated at the same lunch table as Tiffany Trump, and I’m really wondering WTF designed that seating chart!
Agreed
+1 I think it is important to watch to stay informed, especially if you aren’t a Trump supporter. Plus I’m following the stories of those excited for Trump and what promises they expect he’ll fulfill, it forces me out of my bubble.
Anonymous
Poor Tiffany! She is so clearly the black sheep of the family.
Ms B
Of all the Trumps, I have the most hope for Tiffany. Maybe HRC will rub off on her . . .
PrettyPrimadonna
Nah. Didn’t watch. Not interested.
cbackson
I had meetings, but I actually don’t ever watch highly stage-managed political events (inaugurations, state of the unions, or presidential debates), even if I generally like the president. Although I try not to like presidents, because I feel like a high degree of skepticism toward the president is healthy for the body politic. It’s hard to do that when it’s someone as likable as Obama…I suspect it will be easier this time around.
Anonymous
He’s not all that likable, really. Check out you know the wars, all the illegal aliens he’s deported, the children in detention, the bankers who stole our money. He wasn’t a very good leader.
Anonymous
Wait…you like Trump but you’re complaining that Obama deported too many undocumented immigrants? Does. Not. Compute.
Anonymous
LOL @ “the bankers who stole our money.” You know Trump has former high-ranking Goldman Sachs executives in his cabinet right? There is literally no President in US history who has been more in bed with Wall Street than he is.
Anon2
You mean the wars that Bush started and officially ended under Obama? Those wars?
Anonymous
Really? Exactly which wars ended? Exactly when did Gitmo close? You have blinders on.
Anon
There is a difference between being likable and being a good leader and being a strong leader.
I agree that he was weak on certain issues, but you cannot blame him for the actions of some Wall Street bankers, or the lack of progress in peace in the Middle East. (The U.S. response, yes, but not their actions.)
cbackson
This, exactly. Likability is actually something I think we have to resist in our politicians, because it blinds us to precisely the policy issues. Obama’s incredible likability got alot of folks to ignore things that they disliked about his policy. GW Bush was actually the same way, particularly if you met him in person.
CPA Lady
I watched the whole thing with the sound off. I’m glad it all went smoothly, though he’s certainly not the person I hoped would be standing there, and I’m worried for our country. I’m just ready to move forward.
Anonymous
I couldn’t not watch, it was a car crash. I felt sick when he took the oath.
Emmer
I didn’t watch the speech and was planning on just reading the headlines this evening, but then I heard from friends that an idiot group of anarchist protesters were smashing windows and setting things on fire downtown. I live here, so I had to tune in to verify where it was happening, whether my office was affected, whether public transit was affected, etc. So angry that this one group of morons is dominating the coverage (and hurting the same people they claim to support – ordinary people whose cars and businesses they vandalized) when there are so many peaceful groups that have even more of a presence today.
Anon
Not watching. Not giving him the eyeballs. And you know that’s something he wants even more than p**sy.
Scarlett
+1 – I felt strongly about not watching and set my TV to stay on and tuned to Bravo all day.
ChiLaw
Here’s a lighter topic: where the F have all the forks gone? Our shared break room/kitchen has all the regular stuff, cups, bowls, plates, cutlery, EXCEPT the forks disappear at a truly alarming pace. There’s a dishwasher right there so everyone eats and then puts their stuff in the dishwasher, so wtffff is going on?
NOLA
We have a big break room on our floor and a smaller one on the first floor. Our stuff sometimes migrates. But every once in a while, I check and we have one fork or one spoon, or one bowl. It drives me crazy. I buy a lot of the cutlery myself so I find it really annoying. My guess is that people either carry off the forks (to an office to eat) or throw them away by mistake.
Anon
The forks belong to the same union as the staplers and hole-punchers (unlike the knives, which are with the scissors). You might want to check to be sure that no strike has been declared. If there has been office accessory abuse going on, they might have walked off in sympathy.
Anon
They take them to their desks and eventually throw them away.
Legal Canuck
Our office it is the spoons. We don’t know where they go at all.
Anonymous
Pillow help please? I know, extremely glamorous, but I can’t for the life of me find a pillow I like! I recently learned I am allergic to down, so my go-to previous pillow doesn’t work. I like very fluffy but not much resistance when my head is on it (stomach sleeper, but i like it to fluff around my head without holding it up much). Think a low-stuffed down pillow. I feel like I’ve tried everything, so I throw myself on your mercy for suggestions. Thank you!
meme
I recently ordered a down-alternative pillow from the Company Store for my down-loving husband based on recommendations here. I’m an allergy sufferer so he can’t have the real thing. It hasn’t arrived yet, but they have lots of choices for loft and filling, great reviews, reasonable prices, and a 100% satisfaction guarantee, so if you don’t pick the right one he first time, you can exchange for another.
Amy
No pillow recommendation, but some advice: try to stop sleeping on your stomach. Last year I developed some pretty bad upper-back/neck problems and my chiropractor said the pain and mobility problems are from years of stomach sleeping. It’s my most comfortable position, but if you think about it, sleeping on your stomach forces your neck into a really abnormal/twisted position, and if you stay that way all night – well. All I can say is it’s taken me twice-weekly chiropractic visits just to not be in pain. I had to start taping a tennis ball to my stomach at night (really) but I am finally sleeping on my back or side, and my back/neck problems are much better.
New Tampanian
I bought the Night pillow and it is my favorite pillow of all time. It’s pricey but for whatever reason I love it. Can’t fully explain why. I never need to adjust it. Neck always feels great with it.
padi
Hi all!
I am in need of shoe help. I am looking for oxfords with brogue detail that fit high narrow-ish feet with a high instep.
I have tried (and returned) the Bed Stu Lita (omg gorgeous! but $200) and the Seychelles Ambush (closer to my $150 budget). Neither accommodated my apparently super-high instep. The top of my foot still has impressions of shoelaces.
I am almost desperate enough to go to the mall this weekend (the horror!), can anyone help me?
Torin
I’ve been coveting these lately:
http://www.toms.com/women/womens-shoes/brogues
I think I have relatively high arches and I find Toms comfortable.
VKJ
I was just going to suggest the Toms Brogues as well. I have them in the suede grey and really like them.
Sloan Sabbith
I really like the Toms brogues I have, I have them in a grey and black floral. They’re very….clicky… when walking, but it makes me feel confident.
Anyway. Yes. Very comfortable. Although they did give me terrible, terrible cuts on the side of my ankles the first few times I wore them.
Anonymous
+1
anony
I’m a CPA and a my friend that is a financial advisor gave me and my husband tickets to a professional basketball game because I referred a pretty large client over to him. The tickets are not his tickets but his company’s season tickets (if it matters). They are very good tickets. The game is late next week. Turns out my husband can’t go because he has a work event the same night. A friend of mine absolutely LOVES this team and would die if I gave him the tickets. I know him and his brother very well and I know they would behave in the seats. Is it totally out of line to give my friend the tickets? I think if I’m asking this question that I already know the answer but wanted to check with you ladies.
Jules
The tickets were a gift, they’re yours to do what you like with. Give them to your friend without qualms.
Senior Attorney
This. He gave them to you as a thank you. They had served their purpose for him the minute he handed them over. You get to do as you please with them.
Anony
My husband was totally appalled that I would consider giving the tickets away. My only worry – what if they have 4 season tickets and then they’re expecting me to be there and my friend is there instead?
SC
I think you should offer to return the tickets to your financial advisor friend, but when you offer, you could mention that you also know someone who would love to use them.
Walnut
Can you take your friend who loves the team since your husband can’t go? If not, I would return the tickets to financial advisor friend.
Anonymous
+1. Maybe there’s a reason OP didn’t mention this as an option, but that would be my first instinct to take the friend. I do think it’s a little strange if you are available to go to give them to someone else instead of just bringing a +1.
Even if they only have those two tickets, season ticket holders generally talk to each other so I’d be wary that they might find out at the next game they go to that you weren’t there. It may sound weird, but my parents have had season tickets for 20+ years and when they sell their tickets for one game, they show up at the next one and unprompted get a “report” from their seat neighbors on who was their the previous week (typically pitched more innocently albeit still nosy, such as, “Oh we had the loveliest time chatting with Bob and Sue, are they your in-laws?”).
Anonymous
+1. I’m surprised people think you can just give them away.
NOLA
Yeah, I think this would be a better solution. A friend of mine was given tickets to a pro basketball game by a drug rep (she’s a veterinarian) and she took me rather than her boyfriend because he was out of town. She thought we were just going to the game and sitting in regular seats. Turned out it was a suite hosted by the company and when we got there, they were totally confused by two women (I’m almost old enough to be her mother) rather than my friend and her significant other. It was fine, but there’s no way this would have worked if she had just given her tickets away.
ChiLaw
Why not take your friend, though, and not his brother? It would probably be fun for both of you that way, and if they do have four seats, you will be showing up.
Anon
You should either offer to return them or take your friend. You should not give them away wholesale. That’s a step above scalping them.
And I know the company who gave them to you has to document them as entertainment expense. They need your name on the record.
Sloan Sabbith
Date update: The guy who canceled on me last week never got back to me about scheduling a raincheck and deleted his account. I’m thinking his excuse wasn’t actually true.
Today is so, super great. Really, A+.
Anon
Wow you must be very scary!!
Men are like buses. There’ll be another one in a few minutes.
Yvonne
:)
Nylon girl
Tomorrow will be better than today. It just has to says the lady who’s son vomited on her twice this morning & then the whole Trump thing. Hang in there. Thank goodness it’s the weekend.
Hang in there
It’s not you! *hugs*
Naomi
I’ve just been invited to a black tie/formal ball. I’m currently not at a weight I like, so I don’t want to spend big money on a dress I hope I won’t fit into in a year. Men will be in tuxes, there’s a seated dinner, and dancing with an orchestra. I feel like I can’t get away with a LBD. Any suggestions on where to go? Nordstorm Rack?
Gail the Goldfish
Yes, Nordstrom Rack. Or Saks Off Fifth. Or I have found black tie dresses at TJ Maxx. Occasionally Marshall’s or Ross.
Sloan Sabbith
Rent the Runway sounds perfect for this.
...
What do you do when you know your relationship is too bad to stay in, even when it’s temporarily ok? How do you get your heart to follow your mind’s advice to choose to hurt now so you won’t hurt later/indefinitely?
I know all of the books you can read or the positive thinking thing, but the part that requires action… that’s where I struggle. The part where I have to do things that will break my own heart by changing things because my brain knows they eventually have to change… how do I do that?
Any stories of people who have done it and been successful?
Anon
Yes! Rip off the bandaid. You will have good days and bad days but overall you will feel So Much Better. You will feel free!
When I was having doubts about my first marriage I saw a therapist, and I asked her “how do people know that they should get divorced?” She said “most people wait way too long, until they’re absolutely miserable.”
You sound pretty miserable. Give yourself he gift of freedom. Believe in yourself. You can do this.
Sloan Sabbith
“Go, because you want to. Because wanting to leave is enough.”
I was in an abusive relationship for almost the entirety of law school. I tried to leave, went back, tried to leave, went back. Finally, late last winter, I said to myself “Enough is enough.” I gave an ultimatum (ineffective, but I needed to know I’d tried one last time) and then, when it was ignored, was out of there. I went no contact. Deleted all possible forms of communication, blocked the man on Facebook, etc. Since then (almost a year, I am so proud of myself!) we’ve talked 6 times: When I needed items back from him that he still had that were mine, when we were stuck together at graduation and had to make small talk, same deal during bar prep, once when he texted me out of the blue and I told him to leave me alone and then blocked his phone number, and once this fall at a social event where he tried to take up his old abusive tendencies to me and I told him off.
Here are things that worked for me: Accepting it would suck. Going to therapy BEFORE I ended it (started my 1L year, but what’s important is that you already have a relationship with the therapist). Promising myself that if I wanted to contact him, I could, but I had to wait 24 hours from the time I decided I want to (this still comes in handy- it’s always at like, 11 PM and I just say “Okay, fine. You can text him. Tomorrow.” I’ve never, ever wanted to the next day). Letting myself have days where it mega-sucked (those still happen once in a blue moon, but there were quite a lot of them early last spring). Asking myself what I would tell my daughter or best friend if she told me this was happening to her. Reaching out to others for support. And letting myself be SO MAD about something that I probably could have gotten over- that made it so that I was still way, way too angry to talk to him until the initial period of “Oh but I should just apologize, reach out, make things better” period had passed.
Loli
I just heard this quote recently in regards to something like this. It was “Make the decision. Your feelings will catch up.”
Anononope!
Am I too late here? Once there was an advice column… was it on the old Hairpin (RIP!)?… and the advice was like: “don’t choose to double-down on long term suck in order to avoid some acute suck.”
I think it’s a good way to think about it. Either way you’re choosing. You’re either choosing more long term, low key pain, or a brief period of acute pain that will hopefully be followed by not-pain!
Like Sloan, it took me forever to leave my law school BF. I wish I’d known the term “gaslighting” when I was with him. I wish I’d known that love shouldn’t look like miserable longing. I wish I’d known that asking for what you wanted and trying to leave if you were told no was not “blackmail” and that a good person wouldn’t see it that way.
And I was still so, so, so sad when I left him. So sad. Ugh it hurt a lot. I recently found some old emails I sent to friends about how I would probably always love and miss him… well, nope. I don’t. For a few solid months I was miserable, and then he started getting threatening (why didn’t I block him?!) and hacking various of my accounts, which made it easier to be glad I burned that bridge, and then, way before I was ready, I met and fell in love with an actually good person, who didn’t mind that I was still recovering from that old relationship, who always respected me, and who is next to me on the couch right now. He’s pretty handsome, too. <3
Gail the Goldfish
Is anyone still around? Because can we talk about the dress Melania is wearing to the ball? I liked her outfit for the inauguration, but the white dress she’s wearing for the ball just looks off somehow. The tailoring in the top, maybe? Not a fan.
Torin
I think the ruffle detail looks interesting in pictures of her where she’s actually walking, but in still photos sort of … odd? I think it might be one of those dresses that moves well but doesn’t photograph the best.
Liz
Hair dilemma. :( My hair has an odd wave to it, so I like using a straightening iron on it. That has ruined the ends. I have tried washing at night, or even every other day, but it is crazy in the morning. Any tips on saving your hair?
Merci
Heat protecting leave in conditioner/product. Frequent trims. Not straightening every day…. so maybe second day hair you put in a ponytail/wear up.
Jules
Second the heat protecting leave-in but also switching up to a more gentle shampoo. I have a slight wave to my hair if I let it air dry and could never get it stick-straight with the straightening iron. I’ve made my peace that I do not have the time to learn the proper technique or to actually do it and the money to get the best tools so I now blow-dry with a large round brush. I curl the ends in a tiny bit. For me, blow-drying my hair is less damaging. Hair still comes out looking shiny and sleek.
Are you open to having curly/wavy hair on some days? There are ways to get heatless curls/waves. I’ve used an old t-shirt cut up in strips to wrap my hair at night. Using larger sections of hair gave me loose curls and smaller (thinner) sections gave me tighter curls. I liked the results.
ChiLaw
How important is straightness to you, vs. just not having an “odd” wave?
I will always rep the sock bun method. (link to follow) I sleep with my hair in a sock bun (no ponytail holder) and wake up with mermaid curls — no heat.
Otherwise, I agree that you can probably do less damaging straightening with blow drying than with a flat iron. I have no coordination but I bought a brush/blowdryer combo for ~$30 and it’s pretty great!
ChiLaw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mI9Qji7Gbvg
Sloan Sabbith
Stay safe today, Hive!
Best comment of the morning so far, seen on FB: “God bless the gay stylist who dressed Kelly Conway.”
Anon
Haha. All my gay friends are convinced that outfit proves she has no gay friends to say “Girl, no.”
Becoming a bookworm
I’ve never been a particularly avid reader in my spare time. This is really surprising because whenever I actually do read I enjoy it so much and ask myself “why don’t I do this everyday?” I go through periods of reading two books a week followed by entire years of not reading any books at all. I’d ideally like to work a little bit of reading into everyday.
If you’re a reader, how’d you get into a “routine”? Where do you look for book recommendations? Can you tell me what your favourite book is – of all time (!)?
Sloan Sabbith
I read at lunch at work and while I eat breakfast and, I’d not eating with people, dinner. I read on my phone or kindle.
Molokai. It’s about a young girl who grows up on Molokai, away from her family. It’s beautifully written and an amazing story. I read it at least once a year.
nylon girl
favorite book of all time was Sarah’s Key, but so so sad. Cried a lot while reading it. Just finished The Velvet Hours–good historical WWII fiction that I loved. Also loved the Nightengale–another WWII fiction book. Reading Modern Lovers right now, it’s just ok.
Sloan Sabbith
I adored Nightingale- have you read All the Light We Cannot See? I liked it almost as much.
MB
I read in bed to help put me to sleep. This also serves the purpose of keeping me off my phone. I also read instead of watch TV. I love reading, but I still go through droughts. I loved taking public transit to work years ago – I went through tons of books!
I can’t say I have a favorite book of all time though. I read non-fiction mostly. I am always browsing the new releases shelf in the library and checking out the others who bought this/read this liked . . . stuff.
Anon
For those of you who love a shopping challenge. Have any of you seen a shoe this style with a lower heel? My ankles and I can’t do 3″.
https://patricianashdesigns.com/footwear/agata-heeled-oxford-black
I marched today!!!!
I marched today in Minnesota! The St. Paul police estimated 60,000 showed up! I carried my “I stand with Planned Parenthood” sign and wore the matching hat, and I think that hat will be my winter hat going forward. So good to see so many women, men, and children reminding Trump and the Republicans that we are watching them, and reminding the groups they attack that many of us stand with them.
This is how I feel: America broke my heart on November 8, but I can’t stop loving her. This is step one to setting her back on the right track. Now, endurance, vigilance, and planning for the future.
TK
Yay! I was so inspired to see so many show up. I couldn’t attend but was there in spirit, and was blown away by the estimate of the Twin Cities crowds. Finally, today – for the first time since the election – I think maybe it’s all going to be ok. The things that used to be important are still important.
My strategy is going to be stop focusing on how Trump is a horrible person – because, Duh, but also because people either don’t care or disagree … instead I’ll focus my rage and attention on things he actually does. I’m taking up Michael Moore on his suggestion and every Monday I’m calling my representative (a Republican) to tell him what I value. First up – it is unacceptable to ask federal agencies to take steps towards dismantling the ACA without a replacement plan. People could literally die.
nylon girl
every Monday is a great idea! lunch break activity for sure!
LLG
Why not! Conservatives do it all the time.
LLG
Should have mentioned that writing letters actually works better than calling or sending emails. Have fun!
New Tampanian
Yay!! I marched in DC. It. Was. Amazing.
So inspiring. I just ordered a new set of notecards to start writing each week!
Jess
Just came across a new brand I wanted to share with you all doing linen summer clothing. I thought linen was old and daggy but they are making it modern! They also have some beautiful handmade hats. It’s called Weekend by Project Fifteen. http://www.weekendbyprojectfifteen.com I have emailed them but does anyone know where I can get it? Hurry up Summer!
Emily L
Kat- I bought this dress in December and wore it to a couple holiday parties and a wedding already. I second your recommendation-I love this dress (and got lots of compliments on it).
Anon
I’m sure no one is looking at this, which is fine. Just giving myself a pep talk to not quit my biglaw job via email right now and to at least wait until I receive my 2016 bonus next month before I quit. Mid-February feels so far from now, but it is so dumb to give up a bonus that exceeds most people’s annual salaries (I’m really not trying to be thoughtless there, I’m grateful for it) especially when I was in the top 5% of billers at my firm.
New Tampanian
Just wait it out. you can do it! Make a countdown (privately) and give yourself little rewards along the way.
Anonymous
I believe you can do it! Take a big deep breath, listen to happy music, and hold on! You’re almost there!
Sloan Sabbith
Count it down. I had a thing last year and when I was about a month away, I started counting down. I had a set hour requirement, so every single hour I spent was one less I had to dread. Checking off that last hour was magical.
Isabelle
I came back from vacation two weeks ago and was so depressed about returning to biglaw I almost handed in my notice right there and then. I’m holding out until the summer because I’m getting married and need the money (not to mention a new job). Mid-february is so soon! (although I understand how you feel). Hang in there!
ChiLaw
You can do it! And seriously, let the check hit your account and then give your notice!
ChiLaw
Just found this image, seems ideal:
http://images.8tracks.com/cover/i/000/653/410/walking-away-from-explosions-4253.jpg?rect=0,39,500,500&q=98&fm=jpg&fit=max
Ash
Does anyone have a suggested replacement for the exact stretch pants from the Limited?
I was just starting to build a set of work “uniforms” and loved those pants, but then the bankruptcy happened and I don’t know if they are coming back. “Requirements” are that the pants be washable, bootcut or very light flare, and not sit too high on the waist. I’ve already tried Express’s Columnist, and the Loft.
Thanks in advance for any advice!
Sloan Sabbith
Gap? Not sure of which style in particular, but could have something. I wash but don’t dry my Gap pants.
Ash
Thanks! I’ll take a look at Gap online – I went by the store today and only saw ankle pants, but I’ll see if online has other options :)
cc
Just an update on the limited- I placed an order on 12/29. When I go to their website now they have filed for bankruptcy and say all orders have been cancelled and will not be shipping.