ByKat Hours Updated
Comments 134 Comments

Weekend Open Thread

Something on your mind? Chat about it here.

How many tops like this is TOO many tops like this? I'm a sucker for this kind of romantic top — I blame Labyrinth. In any event, I'm drooling over the yellow and the navy version, although the coral is also lovely.

It's $49 at J.Crew Factory (where there's a lot of cute stuff lately!).

This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!

Sales of note for 12.5

Sales of note for 12.5

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

134 Comments

  1. Hey all,
    Any recs for a lightweight black jacket that isn’t denim or a blazer? Living in a warm climate but office is cold. I tend toward dressier but work in a v casual office so trying to find the happy medium. Been looking online for ages but seems to be nothing! (I posted this last week but late so
    it got buried.) Has anyone seen anything out there that would fit the bill?

    2. I like the Kuhl Trinity Moto jacket, if that’s the kind of thing you’re looking for.

    5. Banana Republic Factory has had some “knit moto” jackets lately that I have been eying!

    9. Eileen Fisher has a bunch of light jackets that are like cardigans but in different textured fabrics. Zero Maria Cornejo also makes jackets in this lane.

  2. Pretty top but given that the model pictures have at least one shot in every color that is see through enough to see where pants start or end or have visible undergarments, it’s definitely not a buy for me (and certainly not at $50)!

    1. Yes, it is see through. I’m returning it in white today, in fact. Cute cut and pattern but it’s very thin fabric.

  3. I’m starting to have regrets about ghosting a friend about a year ago. I first met her in law school, but we didn’t get close until a few years later. We went out a lot on weekends and sometimes during the week; there was lots of drunken giggling and complaining about bad first dates. Then she became more and more erratic. She went on first dates and aggressively sleeping with men. (She once figured she could go on the date at 6, sleep with him by 8, and be in her own bed by 9.) Calling me screaming and crying about work. Once she got so worked up that I went over there and held her hair while she puked.

    Meanwhile she was pretty nasty to me – making fun of my hair and clothes (your jeans are old, etc). Snide remarks about dieting. She took a lot of energy and made me feel awful about myself.

    After a while I just kind of ghosted her and stopped answering texts. But we were really close. And now I feel bad – what if she was going through some sort of mental health crisis? Should I have been there for her as a friend?

    4. I don’t love the s1ut shaming here, but you don’t have to be friends with anyone you don’t want to be friends with.

    5. Maybe instead of asking ‘should you have’ you can focus on what you want to do now. Do you want her back in your life? ‘Shoulds’ usually lead me to waste my time in ways that I regret later.

    6. I had a friend who did something similar and it turned out to be a coke addiction. We never spoke again, and I think we were both in the wrong, her for hiding it and me for abandoning her.

    7. Instead of ghosting in the future, I would have the difficult conversation. And I wouldn’t wait until there was a stream of offenses. Have the conversation when it happens. . People aren’t going to guess what your boundaries are. You should make them clear–it will help with them and you to have more authentic relationships.

    8. I wonder if law school did this to her? I would never be like that, but remember, you are not a trained counselor either. You could maybe have directed her to one of them who could help her, as her behavior sounds reckless, and could lead to disease and pregnancy, or worse if the guy was abusive. Don’t trouble yourself now, other than maybe to call to check in and follow my recommendation above. Good luck to you and her.

  4. Parent of moody teen wants to know:

    What is the difference between a heath and a moor?

    They each seem to be near where brooding characters tend to go on long walks. Maybe someone in the UK can chime in? They seem to be similar but I cannot quite put my finger on why I think they are different. “Nature, but not a woodland?”

    4. Love this question! As a follow-up, who do I want striding purposefully over it toward me: 2005 Mr. Darcy (Matthew Macfadyen) or 2009 Heathcliff (Tom Hardy)?

        4. No shade on Tom Hardy, but Mr. Darcy (2005 or 1995 both gladly accepted) over toxic Heathcliff every time.

        5. Yes indeed. I am not being snarky at all; I truly don’t understand the 2005 Darcy love. He was like … a wet boring noodle.

      3. 2005 Darcy for me, he was so good at the small subtle gestures. 1995 Darcy looked like a tall Hobbit, and I can’t get past that.

    5. Love this question! I always mix them up, so the link above was very helpful. Can confirm I have strolled in both (no Mr Darcy in sight, ha) and you want a heath for romantic encounters – moors are damp and soggy.

      Am I the only one thinking that not casting (younger) Clive Owen as Mr Darcy in a movie is such a loss to humanity that can now sadly be never made up?

    6. Moor has small hills and heath is quite flat. For moor I always think in Dartmoor and the Baskerville dog (cool and damp) and for heath a warmer and greener area (Jane Austen walk). But you can say also that a moor is a specific kind of heath.

  5. If you decided to stay at a job instead of search/take an offer – did it work out? I have lots of stories from people who left and are glad, but not so much from people who stayed at an org and are glad. I’m on the fence about whether to even look or start calling recruiters back. Things aren’t perfect but I can make do through this year if needed.

    1. I mean, I think that is everyone who hasn’t left their job, really? We’ve all had the opportunities to leave or job search, but decided not to? Inertia is powerful.

      1. This seems to be extremely field dependent. Headhunting isn’t the norm everywhere.

    2. I’ve stayed at my job a few times after getting different offers and have been happy. It doesn’t hurt to look!

    3. I’m happy at my firm, but that doesn’t mean I don’t scroll LinkedIn and Indeed. It’s good to know what is out there.

      Also, if your attitude is “I can make it through the year” then you should be job searching. Don’t wait to hate your job before you start the search for the next one.

    4. I’ve (lightly) searched twice and chosen to stay at my job both times. My specific job has a couple of specific work tasks that I can’t get at other places but bring me a significant amount of joy/satisfaction. I enjoy my coworkers. I’m happy with my compensation. My job also has a fair amount of dysfunction, but so far, the pros I’ve listed have outweighed the cons and I’m happy that I’ve stayed.

      Job searching for me has been beneficial in reminding myself that I have options and I’m choosing to stay. If you’re curious about what else is out there I’d definitely recommend putting feelers out.

    5. I did about a year ago and yes it has worked out well across many dimensions: career development, financially, mental health wise (the original driver of the need for change was intense job-related stress), and just generally feels like the right choice now. I don’t want to give too many specifics – but my employer made a couple significant changes / offered point benefits that I took advantage of which helped; also just the process of going through a job search and getting offers helped me shrug some of the stress – like I knew I’d be able to find another job even if I didn’t take the one right in front of me at that time.

      1. I envy women who are abel to do it all; family, work, children, cooking, busness, etc. Are there any succesful women in the hive who at age 40+ have done it all and care to share? I have not, but wish I had been abel to if I had not gotten sabatoged by men who deceived me. Tell me either way, as I am VERY interested! TIA!

    6. I stayed 6 years ago when my boss offered a promotion to keep me. I have been given fabulous autonomy and opportunity and received two additional promotions (highly unusual in my organization) since then. All promotions involved significant compensation increases.

    7. I’ve turned down offers or withdrawn from the application process multiple times. Either the offer wasn’t quite right and couldn’t be negotiated, or there were some red flags that came up. No harm in looking besides the time you’ll invest in the process. Honestly, it’s probably better to start looking now when you feel like things are tolerable at your current org. This gives you some space to be picky about your next move instead of desperate to get out. The latter situation increases the likelihood you’ll take the first offer that comes along instead of something that’s truly right for you.

    8. I’ve been at my current company for nearly 7 years and the company has been through enough changes, while my job stayed nearly the same, that it doesn’t feel stale. I have a desirable skill set and get a lot of calls to see if I’m open to a change, but nothing has felt right or like it offered more than I have now. I always ask, “what do you offer that I don’t have today?” and the answers have never been compelling. I’m pure commission, so it’s all about the extreme autonomy to run my team, the caliber of my peers, and perception of the platform to achieve my own success. The benefits are also excellent.

      We’ve had a lot of people leave for competitors or to start their own companies, but that hasn’t been right for me.

  6. any early readers/hyperlexics here? my son started reading before 3 so i’ve been looking into it. curious to hear from hyperlexic adults. did you struggle with reading comprehension and social stuff?

    1. I taught myself to read at 3. I have had no issues at all with reading comprehension and curious why that’s something to even worry about? I’m no social butterfly but can make perfectly fine small talk, present to groups, negotiate contracts, have conversations with good friends and family and husband… so can’t really complain there either.

      This is the only time it has come up in my life other than my mother being proud of her toddler…

      1. a decade ago they thought there were 3 distinct types of hyperlexia (Professor Treffert I think). now it’s only recognized as a symptom of autism. i’m in a facebook group with lots of moms of kids under 10 and the older ones regularly run into comprehension problems.

        1. Oh I didn’t realize you were talking about autism in your original post. I posted below about my 3 year old sight reader who is now in college. He is not on the autism spectrum. We had him tested for lots of things, and what he was actually diagnosed with was sensory integration disorder, which he seems to have outgrown. He was not even close to being on the autism spectrum, we went over everything in depth with the specialist (behavioral pediatrician) who continued to treat him for the sensory integration disorder issues. He’s very attuned to how other people feel and is very sensitive to it, possibly overly so. Among other things that ruled out autism.

          1. That is based on old knowledge, Autism can present as HYPER or HYPO symptoms. I have “too much” empathy and it’s an ASD symptom. People with ASD are actually more likely to be ethical vegans/vegetarians than the general public.

          2. autism definitions have changed 3x in the past 15-20 years. odds are good he’d be considered neurodivergent (an umbrella that includes ASD and ADHD) today.

          3. Yes, people with ASD-1 (what used to be called Asperger’s) are often overly sensitive to their own and others’ feelings. The stereotype that people with ASD lack empathy is completely incorrect.

          4. They did all kinds of tests on him. He wasn’t even close on any of them.

            In elementary school he was the most popular kid and was very outgoing. He’s just not. It has never been an issue again.

            He got diagnosed with sensory integration disorder because he wouldn’t stay in his seat in kindergarten and the teacher got fed up and sent him to the principals office (the teacher was in her last year of teaching and was fed up with lots of stuff!) and the principal asked us to have him evaluated because it’s on their list of early intervention stuff the district requires. He ended up with a bumpy cushion for his seat and that solved the staying in the seat problems.

          5. Sure, maybe your particular kid is not autistic. But you said “He’s very attuned to how other people feel and is very sensitive to it, possibly overly so. Among other things that ruled out autism” and people are pointing out that being in tune with other people’s feelings does not rule out autism. My ASD-1 kid is one of the most empathetic people I’ve ever met (and also super affectionate, imaginative, etc.) She is always the kid that will go and sit with a friend who is sad or hurt or lonely. It isn’t at all mutually exclusive with autism, despite the stereotype.

      2. I think the idea is that many kids who read very early can understand the words, but don’t really process what the words are saying. It’s definitely not something OP is making up.

    2. My son was like that. My daughter is 21 months older, so while she was in kindergarten learning how to sound out words, my 3 year old son would sight read them before she was done with the first syllable. He just memorized words. It didn’t really seem to affect him much in terms of reading comprehension, but we were warned that if he didn’t learn the building blocks of how to learn to read phonetically.

      He’s a young adult now and rarely reads for pleasure but I blame that more on being busy with college work and the existence of video games. He struggles socially but what kid who has been through the last two years doesn’t? I would attribute that to lots of things before I got all the way to early reading.

      1. +1 you are describing my son as well. He taught himself reading at age 3, struggled with that list of 100 basic sight words (and, is, the) and it made his early academic years complicated. He is now in college and dealing with social issues.

      2. I learned how to read by memorizing words and never used the phonics approach. I think it threw my parents for a loop, but I don’t have any issues stemming from that, other than I occasionally have to google how to pronounce words because I’ve only read them.

        If anything, I feel like it makes me *better* at reading comprehension because I know the words and can use context clues to understand what is happening.

        I used to get SO bored in elementary school when other people had to read aloud and had to sound out words…it was frustrating. I was an incredibly shy kid though so I wouldn’t have voiced that frustration to anyone.

        Socially, I don’t think this specifically caused issues but I was definitely the child who always had their nose in a book and still am as an adult. Your call on if that’s a “social problem” or not. I think I’m a well-adjusted adult who has solid social skills.

        TL;DR: I have this, don’t have any lasting issues, and honestly it’s pretty much a non-issue for me.

        1. I think the sign of knowing a word but not knowing how to pronounce it IRL is really common with bookworms. It still happens but I just own it – like “how do you pronounce this, I’ve only read it?!”

          I remember one lightbulb moment as a tween when what I knew as “fassAHD” from hearing it spoken was actually the word I’d been pronouncing as “face-aid” mentally when reading it. (Facade.)

          1. Yes!

            I think I was in college when I finally learned that the concept I heard spoken of as “IN-fra-red” was the same as the word I saw on the page and pronounced in my head as “in-FRARE-d” (infrared, of course).

          2. My father used to give me so much grief for mispronouncing words I’d read in books that were above grade level. I’ll never forget pronouncing clandestine as CLAN-DUH-STINE instead of CLAN-DEST-IN in like sixth grade and him tormenting me mercilessly. Dude, you should be proud your kid knows that word at all! It’s the mark of a good reader. And English is a f*cked up, non-phonetic language! I still maintain my pronunciation is more logical since it has the “e” on the end. If they wanted it to be pronounced like the city in Florida they should have spelled it clandestin.

          3. Lol I used to read the dictionary for fun and then would research what the different pronunciation symbols were and how you said them…this whole thread is making me wonder if I actually have high functioning ASD.

            As a follow up to my previous post, I had a MAJOR stutter as a child so maybe that was part of it? Who knows.

          5. A woman I used to work with pronounced kudos as “ka-DOOZ” and absolutely loved to give people a kaDOOZ for their efforts, often. It was so funny.

        2. To this day, I still read the word as epi-TOME (rhymes with home) and think of it as a different word than epi-tuh-mee (epitome).

        3. not sure if i used phonics or not but learned to read before kindergarten from WSJ because it was there.

          otherwise similar. i easily read 100 books a year even with a busy job and as a caregiver and with wonderful hubs.

    3. I started reading very early. No problem with reading comprehension at all. I am not a social butterfly, but I’ve always had friends and good relationships with my colleagues as an adult. Early reading was all positive, no negative for me.

    4. I was not an especially early reader – I learned how to read in first grade as a young 6 year old – but I read at an advanced level very early (~college level around second grade) and I was labeled hyperlexic, as well as highly gifted. I do not struggle with reading comprehension at all. I read fast, and really enjoy reading and always have. I’ve always been a bit socially awkward. I think there are likely a variety of things that contributed to it, but in my experience the stereotypes about only children being socially awkward are grounded in truth. I had the best social experiences in situations in which the vast majority of my peers were also gifted. I can function perfectly fine in other situations like in the workplace as an adult, but I’ve had a much harder time forming deep friendships in those situations.

      1. That should read “the stereotypes about GIFTED children being socially awkward…” I am an only child too but I think the gifted thing is far more relevant to my social skills or lack thereof.

    5. I was reading adult novels by the time I was 4 or 5 years old. Obviously, there was stuff in grown-up novels that didn’t make a lot of sense to me, but it was a vocabulary issue not a comprehension issue, if that makes sense. I struggled socially when I was very young because the gap in cognitive development between me and my peers was pretty significant, but by 5th or 6th grade that had resolved.

      1. That being said – if you have a highly gifted kid (not, like, “normal” gifted but truly off the charts) I honestly think you should mentally approach it in the same way that you would a child with a learning disability. I would have been much happier at a young age if my parents had been willing to seek out and use the services available for highly gifted kids. They really believed in mainstreaming and I was lonely a lot from age 4-11 or so because I couldn’t connect with other kids. By 11-12 I had figured out how to build those relationships but being around other highly gifted kids would have been amazing.

        1. Co-sign. Highly gifted kids are so different from “average” kids and “gifted” kids that they need to be taught in a different way and need opportunities to socialize with other highly gifted kids. This is why CTY was such a formative experience for a lot of tweens in my generation–it’s the first time they are around other kids who are like them. I don’t know whether it’s the same now that the eligibility thresholds have been lowered, except in courses that require “CTY advanced” qualification.

    7. My kid literally learned to read from the TV. She recognized her first sight word at 24 months and was reading chapter books at age 3. In mid-elementary she went through a phase where she read as quickly as she could and retained nothing, then she lost interest in reading anything but graphic novels for a couple of years, probably due to then-undiagnosed ADHD that made it hard for her to concentrate and keep anything in her working memory. She is now in high school, is back to reading for fun, and analyzes literature on an appropriate level for the academic path she’s on (IB).

      She is nowhere near the autism spectrum. She was always more interested in stories than in simply decoding words.

    8. It depends on whether the child comprehends the meaning of what he’s reading or whether he is just recognizing words. If there is comprehension, early reading is likely to be associated with autism.

    9. Early reader, yes (reading before 3). Reading comprehension struggles? No, though I doubt I always gave the expected answers to reading comprehensions that were designed for little kids! I really enjoyed studying languages generally, and I got a degree in literature.

      Social struggles? Yes, but I ended up diagnosed with NVLD, and I had “asynchronous development” accelerations, so that’s no surprise. I got along better with professors and graduate student TAs at the nature center than with anyone my age when I was a child.

      I am also not a fan of mainstreaming or of how schools often handle “twice exceptional” students. I agree so-called “giftedness” should be treated more like a LD (and would add that LD deserves support even in gifted students!). I ended up relying on distance education and tutoring since school just wouldn’t or couldn’t accommodate, and that is how I made my closest friends. I wish school could have been different though.

      I can recommend Jonathan Mooney as someone who talks about outliers in the school system; he had entirely different challenges w/school than I did (he struggled much more with school), but I relate so much to experience of being truly miserable, or conversely really happy, in different educational settings.

    10. Early reader, daughter of an honors English teacher. My only problem was that it distracted everyone from how atrocious I was at math, so I didn’t get the tutoring I needed until late middle school. I still despise numbers.

    11. Wow, I haven’t thought about this in a long time! Punchline – no. I have wonderful friendships and still love reading.

      My older brother is a genius and he taught me to read when I was 2. I loved books and learning. My school district did not have gifted programs but we lived near a public library. I walked there every other day for a new stack of books. I read by flashlight every night for years (glasses since I was 5). The librarians were amazing. I read most/all the classics before I was 10. (Generally understood the story/plot but didn’t really understand the big life concepts). I actually think it hurt my education a bit – I scored so high on tests because of my high reading comprehension that I was able to pick more electives/skip “core” classes. Example: I had free period instead of English all through K-12, tested out of English in college. This meant I had never taken a grammar class and it hurt me a bit in legal writing class.

      Fast forward to now – I regularly read 100-200 books a year, I completed college in two years, made partner at a fairly large law firm in less than seven – reading fast makes me efficient. Re: friends stuff, since this may out me :), I am lucky to have a large contingent of close friends who now live across the country. No bullying, loneliness, etc. that I remember. Socially, I developed “normally” because I had a large family and played sports. I usually talk to friends from middle/high school, college, law school, and my current city every week. And I’m in two book clubs and LOVE this s*te for book recs!

  7. Looking for recs for white pants- denim or denim like. I’m 5’10” and a size 10 pant. My weight is in my butt/hips.

    I live in New England and am looking at wearing them in the spring, so they don’t need to be super lightweight.

    Will pay whatever for the right pants! I feel like the search is endless.

    2. I have good white jeans from Talbots and white chinos from J.Crew Factory. Ditto on sizing up.

  8. Happy Friday! Looking for opinions on acupuncture as a treatment for an actual medical condition (migraines). Neurologist recently recommended it in addition to my meds. I’ve always thought it was “woo woo”. I don’t really want to spend the time or money on something that is unlikely to help at all.

    1. This doesn’t exactly answer your question, but I have done dry needling for chronic migraine and neck pain, which is fairly similar, though the locations are different. I got it done by a physical therapist along with regular physical therapy and other myofascial release techniques, but not all states allow PTs to do it. I’m honestly not sure whether it helped me- I was very sore after each session and it didn’t seem like it was helping, but once I finished a few months of it, it did seem like my neck and shoulder pain and range of motion was better, even if my headaches weren’t. If other things aren’t working, it could be worth a try, as could PT if you feel like there’s any muscular component (botox and magnesium have both been very helpful for this for me as well).

      1. I have migraines and have done both dry needling and acupuncture. Dry needling goes directly into muscles that need attention (for me, my temples, base of my skull, neck, and shoulders). I find it nearly excruciating while it is happening, but extremely helpful in the long-term. Acupuncture location sites are totally different–like hands/feet, arms/legs, ears, etc. I find acupuncture extremely relaxing, but not really helpful with head pain. But different things work for different people and I think they’re both worth a try!

    3. My cousin has been an acupuncturist in private practice for 30 years or so. I don’t know that much about her work, but she has helped many, many people.

    4. It’s one of those things that can really work for things are partly all in our head anyway, like pain perception and anxiety. If there’s some underlying cause that’s not just nerves firing in a way you don’t want them to, I doubt it will help. But poking around in various ways does affect how nerves fire (i.e., sensations and their perception).

    5. If you only trust western medicine, why wouldn’t you believe the neurologist who is recommending it?

    6. I had accupuncture for foot pain, so totally different. I didn’t get any relief from it and told the chiropractor that, then she told me that it was my fault that I didn’t “believe” in it. That was my last visit.

    7. I did it and it helped. Your acupuncturist should be able to code it so it is covered by most insurances.

    8. I think woo woo (But placebo effect is real so, hey if it helps, by all means continue)

      Idk what meds you’ve tried. The newest med I’ve seen are CGRP inhibitors.

    9. Not migraines, but I have had success with acupuncture with greatly reducing pain that PT wasn’t resolving – a recurrent muscle spasm in my back and a pinched nerve and muscle issue in my shoulder. I was dubious going in for the first, but it worked in two sessions both times.

  9. I just won a lot of designer shoes on ebay – should I throw away things like Fendi flipflops? can you clean sandals?

    1. I buy some used shoes from time to time and just Lysol/Clorox them with either a wipe or spray. I’m not a germaphobe though. YMMV.

  10. Does anyone here do contract CFO work for moderately-sized nonprofits (4-5M annual rev) in midwest?
    I am new to role and inherited a “contract CFO” from a mid-sized (reputable locally) CPA firm. This isn’t a pro-bono engagement. I’m struggling to get timely month end closes, or any support on higher-level analysis.

    Post a burner if you’re willing to discuss.

    2. It sounds like it’s time to have a strong talk with this provider and possibly look for a new solution for this set of work.

      Outside CFO sounds costly. Are they really providing better service than a bookkeeper?

    3. 4-5 million is a lot not to have a full-time CFO. They should have at least a full-time bookkeeper on staff with one or two other accounting staff. You might need to do a “clean-up” job, review their processes and analyze their flow-charts. If the work is being done properly, it should not be a struggle to close the month. Sounds like they never had much accountability.

  11. Friday and weekend ask: how do you approach your professional development? is your manager supportive? any favorite tips or recommendations?

    1. I’ll answer from a manager’s perspective. I have regular one-on-ones with my employees and ask questions like “Are you still feeling challenged? How is your workload? Are there things you would like to do more or less of?” as well as more open ended ones like “How do you feel about work?”. If your manager is not asking these questions, you will need to initiate this or you will get nowhere. It is very difficult for me to help employees with professional development if they don’t give me an idea of what direction they want to be heading in other than just making more money. If someone has a plan and a passion, I will bend over backwards to help them and do things like connect them with people in their desired line of work and find ways to pay for additional education even if it’s not directly contributing to my bottom line. However, if someone fails to follow up on the resources I’ve made available, that will be the extent of my contribution to their career. I am also not in a position to simply promote people for being good at their jobs. I have been able to get pay raises in such instances but it will always be a one-time item and cap at around 10%. As much as I think excellent individual contributors should continue to get rewarded for being excellent, compensation is not structured like this at most organizations and many employees fail to understand this fact. I usually explain this the first time I am asked about responsibilities and raises but I know many managers string their high performers along with promises of larger bonuses and far-away promotions. The reality is that a bonus multiplier at mid-level is usually a max of 150% of your target. For most employees it’s a nice (not life-changing) compliment the first year it happens but it is usually unsustainable as excellent performance becomes the norm and ultimately breeds resentment when the reward drops back to target. Promotions are attainable only if there are positions available. It’s basically luck of the draw for even the best performers. Therefore, my personal advice is not to just focus on the quality of your work but bring a plan to your manager, or at least ask them to think about a career plan with you. Prepare by listing things that you like and are good at and see if they have ideas about how to utilize those skills and interests in a higher-paid position and how to prepare for that role. If your manager is unable to help you at all, you need to look for a new job. If your manager says yes to everything and does nothing, same. Last piece of advice, remember that managers are humans and are often struggling with their own career insecurity and lack of voice which they might not want to advertise to you. Asking them about their own experience with, say, getting additional education approved can give you a better picture of what the pyramid looks like above you and how much power they really have.

  12. Hoping someone out there can help:

    My in-house role is expanding to include more contract review and drafting. Does anyone have good resources (I am willing to pay) to improve my skills? Bonus if I can get CLE credit in California. Thank you!

    1. Ken Adams has a great book on clear contract drafting that really helped me early on in my practice.

      1. +1 I also use Tina Stark’s book for my contract drafting class. It’s really good at foundational building blocks.

  13. Re: the tv show topic this morning, specific to Patriot, I am team #CoolRick all the way

      1. I like how Tom has a good son and a bad son, where the good son is an assassin and the bad son is a congressman.

    1. Oh yes! I dropped my Netflix subscription for a few months because I had Peacock for the Olympics and have been watching stuff on HBO and Hulu, but I’ll definitely subscribe again when this comes out!

  15. I have some small, skin colored growths on my face that I would like to have removed. Internet research suggests they are harmless and can either by shaved off or frozen. Should I look for a derm or plastic surgeon for this?

    1. Dermatology for your face.

      Plastics does great wound care, but I consider them for large wounds… post op / decubitus / venous stasis etc.

    3. I have some skin tags. A den tried to freeze it off my face when it changed colors but was unsuccessful, so I kind of gave up. I bought a skin tag remover oil and it actually worked for one of them! It’s not really working on the other, though.

    4. Plastic surgeon. I had some moles on my face, and saw two derms over the years I was considering having them removed. Both referred me to plastic surgeons

  16. I love the look of wide leg pants (like the pants featured on the Wednesday post) but don’t know if I can make them work on my frame. I’m short, busty, and without much difference between my waist and hips. Any tips for finding flattering pants or should I sit this trend out?

    2. I think wide-legged pants actually work best on people who are less curvy in the waist and hip area. A straight line is more important than height.

  17. I have a sensitive question for the HIVE that I have never seen adressed here. I am a young partner with alot of the busness attributable to me. Last week, one of our larger cleints, that I brought in, sent me a D**ck P**ck of him via Text. I know he is interested in me, but he’s never sent anything to me in writing, just a lot of double entender’s, which I laugh off. When I told the manageing partner, I asked whether we should drop him as a cleint. The manageing partner said no, just deal with it. I am not sure that was very helpful, and I am thinking that if I don’t, he will accelerate his interest the next time I take him out to lunch after our depos. I am convinced the manageing partner does NOT want to deal with this b/c he does NOT want to loose the cleint, which could happen. On the other hand, I do not want to think that just b/c he represents a big chunk of my busness that he has the right to treat me as his baby doll, or whatever, especially since he is even younger then me. I do think it is possible to go around him to their CFO, but that could backfire, since this guy is kind of a rising player in the industry. BTW, his D**k P**ck was gross. I can’t imagine anyone thinking his winkie would cause me to want to date him. Ptooey!

Comments are closed.