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Updated: Oct 31, 2018 101 Comments · by

Thursday’s TPS Report: Botanical Illustration Skirt

The Personal Shopper (TPS) |

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Anthropologie pencil skirtOur daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. I love the texture to this pencil skirt — the botanical drawings are interesting but not too twee, and of course, I love the colors. It's part of a great sale at Anthropologie: it was $149, but is now $79. Anthropologie Botanical Illustration Skirt Two lower-priced options are here and here, and a couple of plus-sized alternatives are here and here. Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com. (L-all)

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Comments

  1. Anonymous

    I love this skirt but it just doesn’t seem at all like what lawyers, bankers, consultants and others in Corporette fields are wearing. At all. I could see getting away with this on Friday, but not deliberately purchasing it to be workwear. It feels like a super fun teacher outfit.

    • KT

      Agreed, super cute for a teacher or for a kid-centered non-profit, but not at all appropriate for lawyers, big corporate, etc.

      • tesyaa

        It’d be totally fine for my business casual large corporation, but as others have noted, it’s too distinctive to wear more than occasionally.

          • January

            Agreed. Obviously I wouldn’t wear it for a big day, but for a Friday in the office, I see no problem with it. (Also, it’s so cute!)

          • la vie en bleu

            yeah I and I don’t see why it wouldn’t work as part of a corporate wardrobe. It’s not childish or a really girly floral, it’s pretty sophisticated.

            I thought the whole point of this s1te is that some corporate women don’t want to wear the same black pantsuit every single day of their career.

          • Sydney Bristow

            I’m only a contract attorney in a biglaw office, but I’d wear this too. I like it and agree with la vie en bleu that it looks sophisticated.

      • CPA Lady

        Agreed. I would feel silly wearing this skirt at my office.

        That said, Ms. Frizzle could totally rock this skirt.

        • tesyaa

          Hmm, the reference to Ms. Frizzle made me look closer…. yep, too cartoony.

        • Cb

          I do love a good Magic Schoolbus and a themed outfit. I’m an academic and have a shirtdress that has a library print on it which I feel is pretty appropriate.

    • JJ

      Know your office. The office managing partner at my former BigLaw firm (and a member of the firm’s executive committee and very accomplished litigator) often wore skirts like this. And everyone still took her seriously. The female associates also wore things similar to this, as well.

    • Bonnie

      I’d wear this to work during the summer. I wouldn’t intentionally wear it to court but it would be fine with a blazer for any emergency hearing.

      The skirt is very limiting though. I can’t see wearing it with anything other than black.

    • Must be Tuesday

      I’d wear something like this to my business casual office, but it’s a bit too distinctive to wear frequently. I like the Ann Taylor option better.

  2. Diana Barry

    I feel like a “great sale” at Anthropologie brings their totally ridiculous prices down to something I *might* consider paying, but a lot of their stuff is so distinctive that I wouldn’t wear it to work very often.

    • Gail the Goldfish

      Yea, I don’t fully get who their target demographic is. People in like advertising and fashion and other not-stuffy corporate fields? Teenagers whose parents are buying it for them? Their stuff is too expensive for me to want to buy it for casual wear, but too quirky for work wear for the most part.

      • tesyaa

        Yes (creative field people) and yes (teenagers whose parents are paying). Boden has some of this too – though they carry basics, there are also “spotty skirts” covered with huge primary color polka dots. I always wonder who wears the spotty skirts, I don’t think I’ve every seen one IRL.

        • Sarabeth

          Boden seems to fit the SAHM market. It’s quirky prints, but mostly practical clothes. Not so much with Anthropologie.

        • Anonymous

          I have a spotty skirt. It’s super comfy, fits well and I wear it casually with a tshirt and sandals on the weekend. I’ve also been known to sport it at the office with a cardigan. No issues– lots of compliments.

        • LilyS

          Oh, I have. I grew up in an affluent area with lots of SAHMs and there were a lot of Boden prints. Recently also Joules.

    • Anon

      I agree on price but do not agree that the store doesn’t have an audience or that the audience excludes professionals. I would not purchase my entire work wardrobe there, but many of my tops and sweaters come from anthro. Some skirts and dresses, too. And jewelry. If I had a larger budget, I think I would find and buy many more work pieces there. But I do try to buy on sale (and, in fact, did so this last weekend). Btw, I’m an attorney and work at a medium sized law firm that is not business casual.

    • emeralds

      People do occasionally buy clothes for their lives outside of work. Anthro (on sale) is great for breezy, easy casual dresses. Their house-brand chinos are also amaaazing.

      With that said, I’m at a casual office and am currently wearing both a blouse and said chinos from Anthro.

  3. Woods-comma-Elle

    Not surprisingly, since I started going out with my boyfriend, I’ve put on weight. Not loads, but enough that it is creeping too quickly and needs to be stopped.

    For me, the problem isn’t predictable things like portion size or ‘letting yourself go’, it’s more practical than that. The main change for me has been that we live in totally different parts of town (45 minutes away) and because I work longer hours and we have a lot more friends in high neighbourhood, I mostly stay over at his place, rather than vice versa. The commute from my place to work is walking, whereas the commute from his place is subway. Because I spend less time at home (and work long hours), I never seem to have time to go grocery shopping or, if I do, I’m not home enough and everything goes off before I have a chance to eat it. Also, because I have to take the subway, rather than walk, I don’t get enough exercise.

    He has put on some weight too (probably because he eats out more/we cook actual meals) so we have decided to do something about this together. The obvious stuff like cutting out weekday wine, ordering groceries online, making food for the freezer etc, will be happening, but exercise is probably the hardest as (apart from the obvious and the fact that we both like to walk a lot on the weekends) we won’t really be doing that together and I always struggle with that anyway because I don’t like it, but that’s my problem, not his.

    Anyway, I figured I can’t be the only person with this problem so was curious as to others’ experiences and what kind of changes you made/had to make to manage the lifestyle change from single to coupled up at the point where you spend multiple nights a week together, but aren’t living together yet.

    • Anonymous

      Honestly? I put my foot down with myself. No. I cannot stay at your place more than 2 weeknights. No. I cannot spend all weekend every weekend having fun, because at some point I need to buy groceries. No. We can’t go out tonight because I can’t afford those calories.

      I started viewing taking care of myself as a priority and basically was a better grown up. It was significantly less fun.

      • APP123

        Yep. I only started feeling and looking better when I started prioritizing my healthy choices over my fun choices. I’m never going to be that person that naturally chooses to go shopping for healthy food, wake up early to workout, eat healthfully, or go to bed early. In the moment, I’d so much rather go to brunch, watch Netflix, go to happy hour, and stay up late. But I often felt terrible about those choices down the road – lethargic, bloated, guilty, lazy, etc. Not to mention the weight gain…

        A few months ago I just forced myself to prioritize the healthy choices and then fit the fun choices in around that (e.g., I go to brunch on Sundays with my girlfriends, but only because I’ve already gotten up to workout and go to the grocery store).

        TBH, I hated it at first (at least in the moment when I was turning down brunch plans), but my self esteem is so much better now that I take care of myself. What helped me was to think about that ideal vision of myself in my head (not my physical body, but what my ideal self would do, how she would act, what she would think, etc.), and tried to behave accordingly.

        I feel so much better now that I’m more of a “grown up.”

      • CountC

        Yup, this. My health and fitness is a priority for me, but it’s easy for me to fall into giving that up in a new relationship where it is so much fun and you want to spend all the time together. I finally put my foot down and said, yes I can come to your place (my ex was 45 mins away), but not until I go to the gym/run. Or, I can come to your place, but I will be running/going to the gym when I get there. And I would get up on the weekends earlier than he would in order to get a run or a workout in. He was interested in working out to though, so we often did it together. I also put my foot down about eating out. Yes, I want to have dinner with you, but we need to go to the store and buy healthy food to make instead of picking it up at the local bar. Takes a little more energy and a little more time, but we both felt better.

    • First Year Anon

      I have had this happen too! I think as the relationship progresses you drink less wine (I find early days both people are more ‘let’s have a drink’ to calm nerves and because it’s fun to go out and be social) and going out becomes more of a treat, so it eventually evens itself out. I’m also more willing to say “I am going to go for a run” and come back to his place to shower etc so I still get my workouts in.

      Now that it is warm outside, maybe make more of your dates include some walks before and after dinner? Learn to cook new healthy meals together?

      Get off a couple of subway stops early and walk the rest of the way?

    • anonymous

      make a list and go grocery shopping together. Before we were living together/married, it was such a simple pleasure to grocery shop together, even if it was for one person’s stuff and not both of ours.

    • Ellen

      Yay! I love this dress, even tho it is a little too liberal for wearing to court. It is cute, so mabye guys will look at me, even if it is a little tight in the tuchus!

      As for the OP, you should NOT turn into a sexueal slave to your boyfreind. I think that is how I might have let myself go in the sense that b/c I had Sheketovits, it was very convenient to lounge around in my pajamas, and Sheketovits loved having “ready access” to me, when he should have been workeing alot harder b/f I should have given in and had sex so many times with him.

      In your case, you need more excercise, and NOT of the horizontal variety — tho that is also good for you, but NOT alway’s at HIS place and NOT the way HE want’s it. You have your OWN life to live and that should NOT alway’s have to be what HE want’s to do at his place. You ALSO have to learn to eat better, and NOT snack on food’s at HIS place, which probabley involves’ alot of potato chip’s and bean dip, which goes right to your HIPS and TUCHUS — at least it does mine. FOOEY!

      Tell your BOYFREIND that you do NOT want to do things all the time HIS way. You are an independent woman, AND even if you are NOT admitted to the bar, you want to remain in GOOD Standeing with your own regulator, which means haveing a lower fat cell count and slimmer tuchus. That is what I want so that I can find a decent guy who will Marry me and move me to Chapaqua! YAY!!!!!!

    • KT

      I found when I had this problem is, despite the fact that we were living together a few days a week and had been seeing each other for a while,w e were still treating each night like a “date”–meaning heavy dinner, dessert, and snuggling on the couch.

      Grocery delivery is a huge help. Maybe consider a service like Blue Apron, where they deliver the exact ingredients for a specific recipe and you can have a date night prepping the meal together.

      Walking together, going to the gym together, or maybe taking up a sport together can work wonders too.

      • Woods-comma-Elle

        Yes. Your first point exactly – I said to him that the problem I have is that when I’m at his place it’s like I’m ‘away’ from home and my normal life stuff doesn’t get done and I need to be more disciplined about acting at his place like I would at home in terms of errands/life management instead of treating it like a vacation!

      • Diana Barry

        +1. This happened to me too when DH and I were first living together, but he was commuting during the week and we were only together on the weekends – so every Friday and Saturday and Sunday were really food-heavy and not a lot of exercise.

    • CHJ

      It sounds like you’re still in the early relationship honeymoon phase, and I say enjoy every second of it. Blowing off the healthy groceries in the fridge in favor of mojitos and Cuban food down the street, because you’re newly in love and having so much fun? Go for it! That is one of life’s greatest joys and it doesn’t come around very often.

      I would try to balance out the evening fun with eating really healthy during the day. Because who really cares what you eat at work anyway, right? Make sure your work meals are full of vegetables and protein, drink a lot of water, and do your best. DH and I also took up some exercise hobbies together in the early months (for us, that was Bikram yoga and marathon training), and that was a really fun way to spend time together, with the bonus of staying in shape.

      • tesyaa

        As a decidedly middle-aged person, I concur. Enjoy yourself as much as you can.

        As for the weight part, you can eat smaller portions even of delicious restaurant food, and have fresh berries for dessert (it’s spring, right?) Getting off the subway early and walking the last several stops also sounds like a plan.

        • Baconpancakes

          I’m not even middle aged (I think), and I wholeheartedly agree. Cook healthier meals together, and make a point to cut meals out in half and take half home. Have cocktails OR dessert. Decide that Saturday morning will be your “we go our separate ways to run errands” morning, and get stuff done, then enjoy the rest of the afternoon and Sunday. There’s some things you’ll regret not being responsible about, like giving up all exercise completely, not taking care of your teeth, and going into debt. You won’t regret having fun with your new beau.

          That said, I do recommend one “me” night a week and one “friends-other-than-beau” night a week. It keeps your time together feeling fresher.

      • AIMS

        I agree that you should enjoy yourselves. Putting your foot down and not spending the night together because you have a squash that’ll go bad in your fridge is just such an unnecessary buzzkill at this point in the relationship! That said, you can do other things to balance your lifestyle. When you’re at his place and not walking to work, go for long walks after dinner instead. Make your weekday breakfasts and lunches lower calorie to counter the wine and more indulgent dinners. Take the stairs as much as you can, everywhere you can. Have lots of s*x. Spend your free time on the weekends doing physical activities now that the weather is getting better – go swimming, try horseback riding, go for a hike in the woods, whatever. And maybe one night or two a week, he can spend the night at your place – you don’t have to see your friends every evening and this way you’ll have more of your routine still in place.

      • Batgirl

        +1! This phase doesn’t last forever so I say enjoy it and tweak the little things that you can (getting off the subway a stop or two early, etc). But live a little! Being a grown up (as some other commenters define it at least) is overrated sometimes–I don’t think there’s anything immature about prioritizing short term happiness occasionally!

    • Marie

      My BF and I had this problem too, though he was staying at my place (he lived 45 minutes away but was the one with the car).

      I think what really helped me was changing how I did my grocery shopping. Staples i would replenish once a week (or as needed for things like oatmeal/cereal): eggs, bread if needed, yogurt, almond milk, nuts, granola bars, etc–things I knew I would eat and had a pretty good idea of how much of them I would eat. But for things that go bad more quickly, like fresh produce and fish (I don’t eat red meat/poultry but if I did I’d do them this way too), and things that were recipe-specific (canned goods usually), I just picked them up the day I planned to use them. BF and I would decide what we were making for dinner and go to the store to grab whatever items we needed–a brick of tofu, veggies for stir fry, salad fixings, for example. Then make the dinner together and eat, box up any leftovers for tomorrow’s lunch.

      I still grocery shop this way because it turns out to be less wasteful if I end up having a busy week and I can’t cook, and I rarely end up with extra vegetables or whatever that I thought I would want to make but then didn’t end up using. It is slightly less convenient and for me largely depends on living very close to a grocery store so YMMV. He and I also really like grocery shopping together, so…

    • Roman Holiday

      I’ve experienced the same thing and the best advice I have is to make eating better and exercising more part of your activities as a couple. Go for a walk or a run together after snuggling up on the couch (with or without the wine). Find some new recipes and cook together. My BF was deeply skeptical when I tried to introduce low carb alternatives a few times a week, but he’s really gotten on board with it. He even wants to get a spiralizer now!

      It’s also hard to prioritize gym time over boyfriend time, but if you think of it as carving out time for yourself, rather than sacrificing time with him. After my BF and I moved in together, my commute got longer and I really hated going to the gym at night after a long drive. Instead, I started running at lunch and got a gym membership to a place closer to my office, rather than my house so I can right after work.

      • Marie

        Yah this too. I had to put my foot down with myself re: gym time because I felt bad that I was “abandoning” my BF at my place while I went to the gym (he wasn’t interested in working out with me, which is fine) and I didn’t want to “sacrifice” fun times together. But actually my guilt was in my head–he just amused himself or did homework or relaxed while I went and had some me time at the gym. Fortunately he’s respectful of my hobbies and independence so it wasn’t an issue. And over the long term I really need that me-time and balance so I just had to kind of rearrange how I fit it all together.

    • TO Lawyer

      This has been happening to me the last few months too. However, it’s starting to even out. Here’s what I do – I eat really healthy during the day and I try to go to the gym at least 3 times a week. It helps that my boyfriend goes to the gym way more than I do so when we’re spending the weekends together, we’ll both go for an hour or so (not together) and then get back to whatever we usually end up doing.

      He has awful eating habits though so unfortunately if I let him have his way, we would end up eating burgers and pizza every day. When we go out (which does happen a fair bit, especially now that it’s nice out), I try to be more disciplined with what I order but not too worried about it. Honestly, this part of the relationship is fun and I know that it won’t last forever so I let myself splurge when we go out together.

      When we’re staying in though, I usually try to cook. When I cook, it’s usually pretty healthy so it’s not so bad. It helps that he’s a trooper and will eat anything, and is trying to be supportive of me so he’s willing to eat healthier than he’s used to.

      Now that we’ve been together for a few months and are spending more nights together (although at my place), I’ve also tried to make it more normal. He has keys so he comes and goes whenever it works for him. Yesterday he went grocery shopping because I was stuck at work so once I got home, we could cook and eat together. A couple months ago, I would have said let’s just order in but I think normalizing your evenings together is a huge help. I find it’s happening more over time though so I wouldn’t push it if I were you. You’re not going to get this happy phase back so enjoy it!

    • A

      You should probably establish your own independent workout routine, independent of your partner. If you spend your weekends at his place, bring your gear and pop into a class or gym, or go for a jog on your own. It might seem like a lot of time, but if you’re literally spending all weekend together, a couple hours is nothing.

      You want something that you will do whether or not he is around. I had an established routine before I met my partner and I haven’t really changed it. Maybe I go to a yoga class on the other side of town where I’ve spent the night rather than the studio near my house, but I still go.

    • Anne

      How about getting off the subway a stop/two stops before you really have to, so you’ll get a small walk into the office in the morning?

      • Killer Kitten Heels

        I used this strategy all the time when I worked in the city, I’d highly recommend it. Honestly, the morning rush hour trains are so crowded and slow that it didn’t even seem to add much time to my commute.

    • Anonymous

      Married but–We keep our weight down by either doing physical activities together (mainly hiking) or, we get our workouts in at the same time. So he’ll go run while I do my exercise video/go to a class at the gym. If you are together all weekend, you can certainly both fit in your exercise on sat/sun morning before doing the fun stuff. We also make a lot of our dates activity centric instead of food-centric. So maybe taking a day trip to a new town and exploring, rather than just going out for dinner/dessert/drinks.

  4. TXLawyer

    Does anyone have suggestions for how to organize transaction documents and/or build a transaction language library? I’m relatively new to the practice area, and I’m having the hardest time developing a system that I can easily access when looking for drafting language or developing base documents. Right now I have all of my prior deal documents organized in email folders, but it’s so inefficient in terms of finding and comparing language from different deal docs. Any thoughts? Thanks in advance!

    • Anon 2

      I keep a spreadsheet with deal name and columns for various features. I also use a uniform set of document names and abbreviations (the first for searching emails and in our document management system; the second for the spreadsheet). It is tedious to update and maintain, but has been so helpful in a pinch.

      • TXLawyer

        This is a great idea to help me internally manage various deals. I need to be more diligent about uniform naming standards for sure.

    • Diana Barry

      Does your firm use imanage or another document management system? I title all my documents with relevant titles including descriptions, so when I need something like a trust for someone with GST provisions, I search my name and “GST” in the title and everything pops up. You can do that with whatever provisions you use. I had to train myself to do it – now everything I do has super long document titles – but it works really well.

      • TXLawyer

        We have a document management system but it lacks the functionality I think I’m looking for- something like “tags.” I guess I’m trying to figure out if there’s a system out there that lets me id documents as “pro-seller” and “good arbitration provision” so that I’m not reinventing the wheel or spending a ton of time searching for that PSA I vaguely remember from 18 months ago that I think might have a good arbitration provision.

        • mascot

          How about creating a few master template documents with all of the options that you want? It will take some time to set up, but once you have developed a “pro-seller purchase agreement” then you can just add to it when you see some language that is good.

        • Anon 2

          This is where the spreadsheet is helpful. You don’t want your document titles / abbreviations to reveal too much when emailed out, but only you can see spreadsheet labels like “OMG LIBOR FLT” and “complex collateral” and “good call right model”

          • Anonymous

            I agree with this reasoning for not using the document titles, and will also add that when you’re junior you have very little control over document titles–each senior associate or partner at my firm has their own naming convention and they expect us to follow it. I personally have used the “description” field in our document management system, but I like the idea of the spreadsheet. I already keep one as a running task list (and completed tasks stay on the list as a reminder of what I’ve done for updating bios/resume) so this would be an easy field to add.

    • MJ

      Does your firm have knowledge management at all? They should be maintaining deal databases. If it’s a small firm, not possible. There’s also PLC. I tend to keep a mental note of deal types, specific provisions, know I can ask partners for precedents as necessary, and also know which other colleagues tend to do really good work so I can rely on their precedents too.

      The spreadsheet is a good idea, but it’s not really just what you’ve worked on that’s helpful. You need to incorporate other stuff too.

    • SoCalAtty

      We have a folder called “contract clauses” and each document is named for a specific clause or issue – like “indemnity” or “limitations of liability.” When we find language we really like, we just add it to the document. A little clunky, but the provisions are easy to find.

      • CountC

        We have something similar – we call it the playbook. It has initial position language and fallback position language (I work for a large corporation, not a firm) and covers all the usual suspects.

  5. New York City

    Hi friends. I’m heading to NYC next weekend to visit family and looking for suggestions for free or low cost things to do. Everyone going is female, late 20s to early 30s. Thoughts?

    • AIMS

      What kind of stuff are you interested in? There is sooooo much free stuff you can do in NYC.
      Theater – Shakespeare in the Park. Go to Central Park to get tickets in the morning, have a picnic lunch on the great lawn, come back for the show at night.
      Museums – the Met is always suggested admission meaning you pay whatever you want, even if it’s $1. Make sure you go to the rooftop to check out the new art installation and get a fantastic bird’s eye view of Central Park and the city (great place for photos). There’s also a bar – drinks aren’t the cheapest (~$14-15) but having a c*cktail at treetop height while looking at all the surrounding penthouses is pretty great. Guggenheim has a free or pay what you wish night Saturday, if that’s more your speed; the Frick on Sunday mornings,. and MOMA on Friday nights (check their websites).
      High Line – always crowded but really fun. You can have an inexpensive lunch at Chelsea Market nearby. The Tacos at Los Tacos No. 1 are incredible. Other options abound, too.
      Brooklyn Flea – fun outdoor flea market & lots of food trucks. Can be a fun weekend morning.
      Staten Island Ferry or the Ikea Ferry – both leave from downtown, both free, great views of Statue of Liberty and the city. SI Ferry a bit more iconic, especially if you’ve seen Working Girl.
      If you go to Time Out New York’s website, you’ll find lots of other special events listed.

      • Gail the Goldfish

        To the Ferry suggestions, I’d also add the East River Ferry. It’s not free, but it’s cheap (I think $4 or $5 one way) and a good view of Manhattan and Brooklyn. If you take it to Long Island City (in Queens), there’s a nice park along the river (Gantry Park) with great views of midtown Manhattan. Governor’s Island is also a fun free outdoor activity in the summer. Oh, and speaking of Queens, I think there may be World’s Fair Anniversary events the weekend you’re there. It’s pretty far out in Queens, but you might want to google that and see if there’s anything interesting going on.

        • Anon.

          +1 to Governors Island. Ferry from Manhattan is $2 (except for the first 2 ferries on the weekends – free!) – or you can take the East River Ferry. This Saturday there is a free concert at 1 and 3 as well as a Free Outdoor Adventures Fest.

      • Senior Attorney

        Just a heads-up that when I was at the Guggenheim last weekend the spiral ramps and rotunda were closed, so there was really nothing to see. You might want to skip it in favor of other alternatives.

    • 2 Cents

      Cheap(ish) restaurant suggestions:

      Galanga–Thai–West 4th Street between 6th and MacDougal (West 4th Street subway stop)
      Chinatown–Japanese & Chinese–all-you-can-eat & drink sushi deal–3rd Avenue & East 93rd

    • Anonymous

      when I visited, I was surprised to find that my brother and his girlfriend have free general admission to most museums in nyc through their jobs, and they could bring up to X amount of guests. this made our museum hopping much more affordable.

  6. Gail the Goldfish

    I know there are some horseback riders out there–does anyone use the protective vests and if so, thoughts and/or suggestions? Do they actually do anything? I fell off (well, got bucked off) for the first time in over a decade last night and I’m wondering if I should start wearing a vest since I’m not as young as I used to be and it’s going to take longer to get over this soreness….

    • KT

      What kind of riding do you do? English, Western? Do you do a lot of trails, or do you jump?

      I’m an English girl, and I can’t stand the vest. So for daily pleasure riding in a sand ring, flatwork, or trail rides, I don’t. But if I’m doing any ring jumping, cross country, paper chases, or fox hunting, I put it the heck on. Going at a good pace over solid fences makes the vest more essential. I’ve taken a few where I’ve landed hard on a cross country fence log jump and it did a good job of protecting my ribs.

      If you haven’t, find an instructor who specializes in falls (seriously). I took 6 weeks worth of lessons with one who taught me how to fall (semi) gracefully and protect myself reflexively. Dozens of bratty off the track Thoroughbreds and hot-headed Arabs later, my ribs and head thank her every day.

      • Gail the Goldfish

        English, jumping usually in a nice soft sand ring, but occasionally solid jumps out in the field (Of course I was in the field not the sand when I fell. It was just going to be one last jump in the field…). Sounds like it might be worth it to wear one at least while jumping. Do you use the regular ones or the inflatable? And how does one find an instructor who specializes in falls? I didn’t know this was a thing.

        • KT

          I hate the inflatable–I found it affected how easily I could move and adjust which actually made things more dangerous.

          I wear the normal ones.

          I just Googled “safety riding instructors” and “Emergency dismount” instructors. Make sure they are certified, and if they give you a crazy look when you say “emergency dismount”, get out of there.

          • RaleighRider

            Any serious, professional instructor of any clout will know what an emergency dismount is and will teach a new rider how to fall, but I’ve honestly never heard of any such certification or specialization for it in over 20 years of riding across several disciplines. The top result in a google search of safety riding instructors in her area brings up a barn with the poorest reputation around. It’s one thing if an instructor gives you to the crazy eye in response to a question about emergency dismounts, but you might definitely get some crazy eye if you ask if they specialize or are certified in falls.

    • B

      Are you talking about the regular (tipperary) protective vests or the inflatable ones? Yes to at least the tipperary, and sometimes also the inflatable, if I’m doing cross-country jumping, riding a young horse, or doing something else with a greater than average chance of falling off. It depends on the type of fall, but they can definitely make a difference. Also, I assume you’re wearing a helmet already, but if not that should be your first priority every time you get on a horse, no exceptions.

      Another thing to consider (coming from a fellow adult ammy) is whether you are appropriately mounted. We all bite it sometimes, but you shouldn’t be riding something that regularly tries to buck you off. You could also consider paying a trainer to ride your horse a few times in the spring, to get him back in work if he’s been off for the winter. Let her deal with the spring fever. :)

      Hope you feel better soon!!

      • Gail the Goldfish

        Probably just the regular ones, if they actually help if you fall. The inflatable ones seem like overkill for what I do (just jumping for fun. No fox hunting, nothing too high or too solid, etc). Any specific suggestions?

    • RaleighRider

      If it makes you feel more comfortable and safer, do it. However, you won’t see many of them at hunter shows – even the unrated shows around the Triangle.

    • Mary Ann Singleton

      I don’t as I ride dressage and I find them uncomfortable for that (but I wear a helmet 100% of the time unlike a lot of dressage riders, but my horse is also a bit of a nut). If I were jumping or eventing, I would absolutely wear the vests. Also if I were starting colts.

      Look up the video for the Point Two air vests – the most effective piece of marketing I have ever seen (so low budget, yet so effective – I’ve shown it to non-horsey friends who feel they should get one of those vests!).

    • SoCalAtty

      I haven’t, as I ride exclusively hunters with an occasional jumper round thrown in for fun or if I’m having a day and need to work things out. I’ve seen them starting to crop up in the younger jumpers, and I see a lot of them in the cross country arenas. Around here the Tipperary and the Charles Owen models seem to be the most popular.

    • L

      I did almost always on cross country and occasionally when jumping in the ring (something new or particularly scary). Falls happen. Learning how to fall properly is very important. If your horse is enthusiastic after not having been ridden for awhile (or needs to work out the kinks) consider lunging first. Even over a few jumps too. Then when they decide to play bronco, you’re not on!

    • MegB

      I do both trail/ring riding and fox hunting and don’t ever wear a vest. I have been known to borrow and wear one in steeple chase or other type events over a cross country style course. I’ve fallen off a bunch, especially off the young horse we a bringing on for my daughter but that’s not something I’ve really considered. I’m 45 for reference and been riding since I was 5. A helmet though, that’s non-negotiable. I don’t put a foot in the stirrup without one.

    • CountC

      I ride hunters and I generally refuse to jump anything that won’t fall down if I crash into it :) I do not wear a vest and probably wouldn’t unless I was jumping cross country, but see my first sentence. I honestly am one of those terrible people that would prefer to ride without a helmet (don’t worry, I wear my approved helmet every ride), so adding the vest would not be something I am interested in. My horse is a super ammy horse, but I do realize no horse is completely bomb proof and accident happen. I still would prefer no gear.

      Anyhow, no one at my barn (A show barn) uses a vest and we range from college students to women in their 50s. I don’t think they are common at the horse shows around here either.

      Despite all of my comments above, if you want to wear one and it would make you more comfortable to do so, BY ALL MEANS do it!!

    • Susie

      I recently got a used Casel off Ebay. I didn’t really want to wear it but I am planning on going cross country and the facility requires it. I haven’t ridden in it yet so can’t really speak as to how restrictive it is. I would have gotten a lighter Tipperary, but I’m cheap.

      • Gail the Goldfish

        Also, RaleighRider–any suggestions for hunter/jumper barns near Raleigh that allow for flexible lesson schedules? (i.e., not MacNair’s). I like my current instructor/location, but I’m not in love with her current crop of horses and am thinking about trying out some other places.

        • RaleighRider

          I’ve found it really difficult to find a barn that has decent lesson horses for adults and offers a flexible schedule, but you might find luck with County Line Equestrian in Louisburg or Storybrook Farm in Wake Forest. I know both try to keep a strong string of horses available, but only have personal experience with County Line. Good luck!

  7. AMB

    I love this skirt as I actually have a Masters in Botany but it’s already sold out!

  8. anonymous

    I have a pencil skirt that looks like a watercolor landscape. It’s mostly cool/unobtrusive colors and the dominant shade is a medium blue that doesn’t stand out too much. I work in a business casual office. Is this too much ladies who lunch, or can I wear it to work? And if I did wear it to work, what would I wear it with?

    • lsw

      I think it sounds fine – I would just avoid doing something like a shirt with lace up top. Keep it simple, maybe go with a navy or colonial blue solid top. What if you paired it with a jacket? A white top would be cute for outside the office but that might make it look too “ladies who lunch” for work.

    • Sus

      A white blazer and a compatible or contrasting blouse. A navy top or a yellow one would be pretty.

    • Anonymous

      Id wear it. I skew a little ladies who lunch in my wardrobe. i wouldn’t wear it as part of the regular rotation (go for once a month or every other month during the season when it’s appropriate).

    • Senior Attorney

      I have a skirt like that and I wear it to work all the time. I like it with a mint blouse and white blazer, or white blouse and navy blazer. I’ve even worn it with a long-sleeve navy tee with a small white stripe, and navy blazer. Or any combination of the above. Plus it’s fun to add a pop of yellow in shoes or bag.

    • la vie en bleu

      If I saw you wearing it I would just be super jealous, I love the watercolor look!

  9. job hunting q

    I did a first round interview about 3 weeks ago. Should I be following up now? Just say that I am checking in? Part of me feels like if they wanted me they wouldve reached out but I know following up is a thing.

    Sorry for the repost- stuck in mod

    • Mpls

      Did they give you any timeline or indication of next steps? If so, then I’d wait for that timeframe +1 week (because it always takes longer than they think).

      Then I’d check in with an email saying “Just wanted to say thanks again for the opportunity to interview. Please let me know if there is any additional information I can provide while you are making your decision.”

    • Anonymous

      I really don’t think that following up is a thing. From my experience, it is only a thing on various forums.

      • Mpls

        ??

        If you have interviewed (met with and talked to people from the company), then at most, you get one follow up.

        I do agree that you generally don’t follow up on applications when you haven’t had any company contact.

      • Must be Tuesday

        Please don’t follow up. If they want to hire you, they’ll let you know. They will, I promise. If they don’t want to hire you, maybe they’ll let you know and maybe they won’t. It may ease your mind to know that you’re still in the running or that the position has been filled, but following up will not help you get the job. It will not help you get the job. At best, you’re making extra work for the interviewers by making them attend to your follow up communication. At worst, you annoy them because they have to attend to your follow up communication.

  10. L

    I get that ads are a part of blog life, but really is it needed to link to the ridiculous NYT article “Young women say no to thongs.” I get that there is little choice over what ads are actually placed, but JFC.

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