ByElizabeth Hours Updated
Comments 277 Comments

Thursday’s Workwear Report: Button-Back Blouse

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This button-back blouse from Anthropologie is such a pretty, feminine piece for summer. The subtle vertical stripes are super flattering and the high neck looks very chic.

This pale blue color would look great with a navy suit for a more formal office, or just tucked into a pencil skirt for a more business casual look.

The top is $98 at Anthropologie and comes in sizes XS–XL.

Sales of note for 1/22/25:

  • Nordstrom – Cashmere on sale; AllSaints, Free People, Nike, Tory Burch, and Vince up to 60%; beauty deals up to 25% off
  • AllSaints – Clearance event, now up to 70% off (some of the best leather jackets!)
  • Ann Taylor – All sale dresses $40 (ends 1/23)
  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything
  • Boden – Clearance, up to 60% off!
  • DeMellier – Final reductions now on, free shipping and returns — includes select options like Montreal, Vancouver, and Venice
  • Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; extra 50% off all clearance, plus ELOQUII X kate spade new york collab just dropped
  • Everlane – Sale of the year, up to 70% off; new markdowns just added
  • J.Crew – Up to 40% off select styles; up to 50% off cashmere
  • J.Crew Factory – End of season sale, extra 60-70% off clearance, online only
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Semi-Annual Red Door Sale – extra 50% off

Sales of note for 1/22/25:

  • Nordstrom – Cashmere on sale; AllSaints, Free People, Nike, Tory Burch, and Vince up to 60%; beauty deals up to 25% off
  • AllSaints – Clearance event, now up to 70% off (some of the best leather jackets!)
  • Ann Taylor – All sale dresses $40 (ends 1/23)
  • Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything
  • Boden – Clearance, up to 60% off!
  • DeMellier – Final reductions now on, free shipping and returns — includes select options like Montreal, Vancouver, and Venice
  • Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; extra 50% off all clearance, plus ELOQUII X kate spade new york collab just dropped
  • Everlane – Sale of the year, up to 70% off; new markdowns just added
  • J.Crew – Up to 40% off select styles; up to 50% off cashmere
  • J.Crew Factory – End of season sale, extra 60-70% off clearance, online only
  • Rothy's – Final Few: Up to 40% off last-chance styles
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Semi-Annual Red Door Sale – extra 50% off

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

277 Comments

  1. I have been grazing a lot when prepping kids meals/cleaning up after them. Any tips on how to stop?

    1. I give into the grazing and just have fruits and veggies (like cherry tomatoes or snap peas) in front of me.

      1. This. I like mini carrots and diet ranch, watermelon, cherries, grapes, and light popcorn for snacking.

    2. I don’t think there are tricks to stopping overeating. I stopped when I decided to make it a priority. I thought about it casually for a long time of course and then when I got serious about it I focused on it for several days. I really thought about it and why it was important and what not overeating looks and feels like (I.e., when do I know I am full), almost like meditation, for several days. I also thought deeply about how being overly full feels and kind of hypnotized myself about how bad that feels to create an early negative response to it. And then I decided to implement it one day and never went back.
      If there is a trick, it would be that you snack on the fruit and vegetables only and don’t allow yourself to just eat whatever whenever. I found it easier to not snack, personally, but I am an abstainer.

      1. +1 I was constantly over eating too and I had to get real with myself about how wildly unpleasant it is to be stuffed. Now as soon as I start feeling a bit full I stop.

    4. I have discovered during COVID that wearing a mask while cooking makes it much easier to avoid bites, licks, and tastes. I did this when baking gifts for non-immediate family members, so I was trying to be careful about not spreading my germs.

      1. God, the idea of wearing a face mask so that you don’t nibble on kids’ snacks sounds like such a disordered thing to do. Not to say that’s why you were doing it in that case, but it gives me such a bad vibe.

        1. Sounds to me more like she was wearing the mask to keep the people she was baking for safe and then realized it also stopped mindless eating so she’s offering it as a suggestion to OP. Not all of us have innate self control.

        3. Ugh yeah…completely agree. Doesn’t sound like it was OP’s intention there but I hope no one else gets ideas.

  2. Elizabeth, this is a cute blouse, and I like the high neckline which prevents men from staring at our cleavage. While the back buttons would surely work with a blazer, in my office, if I took off my blazer, Frank would make a beeline to unbutton a couple of buttons when I turned around, and in the past his excuse was that he thought I should cool off in the heat of the office. Since the #metoo movement started, he has tried to restrain himself, but every so often he reverts to his true self, stareing, and putting his hand on my back and letting it slip to my tuchus.

    I had hoped that after we reopened after a year away, he would have mended his ways, but it goes to show you that a zebra cannot change its stripes, or in his case, a dirtbag will always be a dirtbag, even with all of the NY scandals involving politicians ooogeling and/or grabbing pretty young ladies in private places. FOOEY on them!

  3. Any recommendations for a dermatologist in Houston? In particular, I’m looking for Botox. In the loop would be preferable, since I work downtown and live within walking distance. Thanks!

    1. I really like Dr. Mullens at Uptown Dermatology! She’s a bit goofy but she never presses me to get more stuff done to my face – it’s always me suggesting it. And she so far has done it to exactly the level I wanted. I’ve also gotten IPLs done there, which were super successful. And perhaps more importantly than all of that, she also keeps her appointments on schedule. :)

      1. I’m nowhere near Texas but I’ve honestly never heard a better review of a doctor, we need more like her.

    2. Dr. Camille Cash is a very experienced plastic surgeon that also does Botox. She’s super helpful, prompt, and makes the appointment very easy going. Upper Kirby.

    3. i also live in Houston. living downtown and walking to work is quite unusual for Houston! I go to Houston Dermatology Associates

    4. A lot of friends see Dr. Jennifer Segal and I was thinking of checking her out post-having a baby. I suspect she’s quite expensive though but people seem to like her. Following other recommendations with interest! I’m hoping to get IPL and Botox both done next year!

  4. Yesterday’s discussion about POOPCUPS made me think, what is the appropriate way to share your successes? Is there even a way to do it without social judgement?

    1. IME, it’s not always how you share them, but how discerning you are in what you share and how often. Especially on social media.

      1. Yup. An occasional post like – here’s my kid at their dance recital or piano recital or final sports game or whatever, so proud of how hard they worked this year! Fine.

        A steady stream of “I’m so glad we started feeding Brayden a variety of foods as soon as he could eat them! Look at him scarfing down that sushi!” = unfollow. That’s more about how you are the best parent ever and therefore your kid is better than everyone else’s kid. Nope.

        1. Yes, perfect example. Anything that reflects on you, the parent, more than the kid is annoying. I have to mute those people. I also feel like it’s pretty specific to parents with young children; by mid-elementary school, most parents have chilled out and/or realized that their parenting isn’t the be-all, end-all and they have less control over their kids’ preferences or behavior than they like to believe in the early years.

        2. It’s Jaston’s first day of school, but we are going to put a * by the school and flag the Accelerated Program he is in at the school, so his 4th grade year is really your sophomore year in college. Yes, your poor kids are in classes where the ratio is something like, but in Accelerated Program, he gets bespoke teaching and a 1:4 ratio. Your tax dollars at work! And we are so, SO proud of him for finishing all of his grade school math at the end of third grade so that he is now on to multivariable calculus. And in science, he will be performing an appendectomy. Tune in to his YouTube channel!

          3. At least Christmas brag letters are just once a year. FB is daily with some people I know like this.

            “Our amazing Alexander conquered even more of the known world[; too bad he doesn’t yet know he will die in his 30s and be referred to by kids who like fart jokes as ‘Alexander the Grape’.]”

          5. In our county, they have an Accelerated Program. It has a name that I think is supposed to inspire awe. It reads to me as something that teen moms or kids in juvenile detention would be sent to instead of their vanilla neighborhood school. Like “New Horizons Program,” or similar. So maybe it is a joke on the braggy parents?

        3. I enjoy seeing feats of strength but I don’t care about your kid’s grade on his math homework. So “Susie can finally do a back-hand-spring. She is so proud of herself. Check it out” I think is actually cool because I remember how hard it was to learn those. I actually could never do one!

          Or families that hike their first 4000 footer post having kids and the five year old carried his own pack. That’s a real accomplishment.

          Academic accomplishments are real too but not every quiz is an accomplishment!

          1. I’m ok with obnoxious parent posts so long as they are balanced by not obnoxious ones. Like I have friends that totally brag about their kids wins but also post about the incredibly stupid/hilarious stuff they do so it doesn’t feel so much like bragging, more just sharing bits of their lives. On the other hand, people who only post about the obnoxious braggy kid stuff get eyerolls. IMO if you share your parenting fails I’m ok with you sharing your parenting wins

          2. Re. back handsprings, there is a whole toxic culture out there of parents’ sharing their kids’ gymnastics feats on social media. These kids are disparagingly referred to as “insta-gymmies.” The parents are all convinced that their kids are going to the Olympics and brag about insane training hours and regimens, moving up levels at unsafe speeds, risky home equipment setups (kids doing giants on home bar setups where if they peel they will literally fly out the window, etc.), and all kinds of other crazy stuff. It’s totally exploitative.

    2. I think the difference is between sharing YOUR success and sharing your KIDS success. POOPCUPS don’t seem to realize that their kids are not a copy/paste of them and that while they do (or should anyway) guide, shape, influence, and support their kids, they are not themselves DIRECTLY responsible for their kids success. Nor is their kids success (or lack thereof) a direct reflection on them. That way of thinking leads to college admission scandals. And even for parents who aren’t that bad, their kids are going to chafe at the attitude of ‘my parents are directly responsible for my success’ REAL soon if they haven’t already.
      Sharing your own success is fine! I love to cheer on my friends and colleagues who’ve achieved things they worked hard for – especially in a rough year, I was so thrilled to celebrate any wins, big or small.

    3. I think it’s appropriate to share substantive information–a link to the latest article you’ve published or a webinar or podcast where you were a speaker–but not just to brag about accomplishments. On LinkedIn you can update your job title, etc. without its looking braggy.

    4. I am genuinely happy to share in my friends’ successes on social media. Parenting brags are totally different than receiving an award or what have you. Something simple like, “I was honored to learn today that I’ve been nominated for the Do-Gooder Award. It’s a remarkable field of nominees and I’m humbled to be included in their ranks.”

    5. Friends have a child who has dwarfism, which has had complications resulting in hospital stays and surgeries, and autism. She has had to take some big steps back in her job and move to be closer to family for added support. Their kid-related posts are what I love about FB and are such an antidote to the POOPCUPS. For the POOPCUPS, a kid’s accomplishments are a reflection on the parents. IDK what happens when that kid goes to Harvard and is average and then joins McKinsey and is eventually just another partner there. At some point, you are average. Eventually, we die. As dust, we are each other. How demeaning is that? Or is that the point — if you are Christian, we are all God’s creations, all loved, no one is less than.

      1. My aunt was an OG POOPCUP, my cousins were always the smartest, most well-behaved, the best all around. Now we’re all in our forties and we’re all fine….? Three of the four of us are lawyers, one is a part-time vet. My sister and I went to higher-ranked schools, but honestly, I don’t think that matters as much as it did to my parents when we were teenagers.

    6. Also, WTH is a POOPCUP and why are we typing it in all caps? I’ve gathered from context that we’re talking about crappy people we don’t like, but I’ve never heard this before.

      1. It’s an acronym — parents of one perfect child under pre-school [age]; per yesterday’s convo, it often extends well past that age

      2. It’s an acronym for Parents of One Perfect Child Under Preschool Age. Google the scary mommy article explaining the concept.

    7. On LinkedIn, I just changed my title to Partner from Counsel at my law firm. The bigger deal, from income partner to equity partner, is much more significant IMO but there was no announcement or anything. I just had to start paying quarterly taxes.

      Maybe I am weird? But I don’t think that my clients really care.

  5. Just wanted to say I SO enjoyed yesterday’s small town post. What a great discussion!

    1. me too, i was actually going to post today asking if anyone would mind sharing the name of their small town. i know this blog is to remain anonymous, so nothing else about yourself, just the name of the town. i’d love to know where these places actually are

      1. I was one of the posters and have at different points in my life lived in both Weston, MA and Carlisle, MA. Both have a lot of the small town elements, but Carlisle a little more so: pancake breakfasts, old home day, Halloween costume parade through the town center, ham and bean supper at the fire house in the winter and grilled chicken dinner at the firehouse in the summer, cake walks, etc.

        1. Hi neighbor! Grew up in Acton, MA and Westford, MA! Westford and Carlisle seem the same.

      5. I wasn’t on the original post but I’m a transplant in Pembroke, NH. In the winter, there is a town holiday light competition. We get maps with all of the houses participating and you drive around and rank your favorites. You have to pay to be on the map, not sure about paying to get the map. We are on the map so we get it as part of joining. The money goes to charity. The winners get a prize.

        There is a bar that’s been here forever and I still feel out of place walking in because everyone knows everyone there. The owner and waitstaff know us now as the new people in the neighborhood across the street, which is hilarious as we have lived here over 10 years.

        There is a park where you can BBQ and go fishing or kayaking. They have concerts there in the summer and an Old Home Days festival. The town FB page is fun because it often has people ratting other people out in a public shaming way like Joe – we saw you not pick up your dog poop. Do better!

        My widowed neighbor’s kids are grown so she invites us to swim in her pool. We invite her over for the holidays. The town has rallied behind families that have had fires or an accident. The town fundraises for toys/meals for families that can’t afford it around xmas and it is all anonymous and always a success.

        We were actually listed in Reader’s Digest best places to live recently!

        I’m also the person that posted mid pandemic about how I discovered so many cool things about my town while stuck at home. Lots of great trails to walk, river to swim in, wild berries to pick, wildlife to watch. I’m pretty happy here!

    2. I was the OP for that post and I’m glad it was enjoyed! I was a bit worried about the question incase it sounded off.

    3. I grew up in Geneva, IL which has grown a lot since I grew up there but retains some of the features discussed.

    5. I was wondering about the town names as well and whether or not there were any in the south or west (I always got the feeling they were in the NE), and whether or not they are brown people friendly (for living and/or visiting). I’d love to live in a quaint town like that but ime cities are often safer for me…

    6. I won’t say my hometown, but I’ll put in a plug for my college town, Athens, Ohio. Really beautiful surroundings, an hour and a half to the state capital, small-town feel with the benefits of a large college campus. There are some nearby towns that are struggling economically but holding on to the main streets, too.

  6. Button-back reminds me of the pussy-bow blouse that Kate Middleton wore backwards – to get the buttons in front. If not even UK royalty can be bothered to have other people button up their backs, the rest of us can surely skip it! :D

    The fabric looks lovely for summer, though.

    1. You only need to unbutton the top two or three buttons. It’s not really that much work if you like the shirt.

      1. Yeah, I don’t get this. Surely you don’t put that kind of top on unbuttoned and then button it. You put it on already buttoned except for the first two or so so your head can fit through.

  7. I’m considering a career shift and would like some advice on which industry or companies would be right for me. I’m currently a master’s-level policy researcher at a policy consulting company with a focus on health and healthcare projects. My degree is in public health. I generally like my work, at least on the better projects, but I hate billing and the hustle to be fully staffed. I also don’t feel challenged or like my work is valued (at least at this company). In thinking about what I want and how I work best, I’m considering whether switching to research in academia, government, or a non-consulting think tank would be right for me. I’d be interested in exploring the intersection of health and national security/intelligence – think pandemic risk research, research on the connection between poor health conditions and extremism, etc. I thrive on digging deep into an issue and preparing detailed issue briefs and presentations to drive decision-making. Something like RAND looks appealing except for the consulting/billable factor that I’m trying to get away from. Anyone have better ideas? I live on the West Coast and would prefer to work remotely if I can, but I want to keep every option open right now and even consider big shifts like the U.S. Public Health Service Commissioned Corps. Would love any intel on that in particular…although now that I think about it, there’s no way I could pass the medical with my autoimmune history :(

    1. I have a friend who started life as an EMT and went into the emergency response side of public health (which is sort of homeland security related) working with EMT / fire / first responders in high-target areas in the US (but applicable to any big city anywhere).

    2. No advice, but I’m looking to make a similar-ish switch. Currently work in government in emergency management but would like to get more into public health (after essentially doing public health work for the last 15 months). There’s so many interesting topics in that homeland security’s / emergency management / public health nexus!

      I used to work with some members of the USPHS Commissioned Corps. It’s such a great organization and I wish I had the background to join it!

    3. What youre describing sounds like what federal policy analysts do. Let me preface by saying I’m not in the same field as you so I can’t give specific recommendations. Essentially what I do is a whole bunch of research, which is sometimes a report, sometimes a presentation, sometimes a briefing, regardless of how it’s presented the work is used to establish the policy position on a particular file. From there its usually negotiations and working out how to actually implement the policy. In my field that’s done through UN agency measures and domestic legislation.

    4. If the hustle to be fully staffed is a stressor, then academic research might bring a very similar source of stress, what with the need to win funding for proposed research through competitive selection procedures.

  8. After the drama of the past year and change and dealing with schools being shut and too much camping, I am going to spend a day at the spa. I have lots of clogged pores (oily skin, sunscreen gunks it up worse) and acne scars. Is there a spa treatment that will help with this? Otherwise, I’ll just get a massage and a pedicure. OTOH, if there is a med spa / laser / dermatologist treatment that would help, what is that called? I think it’s time to do something, but IDK what thing. At my age, people are worried re dry skin and wrinkles and I am still in the bad teen skin phrase of life.

    1. One facial will not help with scars btw, but lasers/peels (stronger acids than you get at a medispa) will. You’re going to want a dermatologist appointment, the treatment for ice-pick scaring is different from other types, and post-inflammation hyperpigmentation or PIH is different than scars but can also be helped by lasers or strong peels). I sympathize with your skin issues having given in and done a round of Accutane for my PCOS related acne in my 30’s that did not want to respond to other prescription options. It stinks but hey, at least this time around I have the ability to go see a doctor and afford treatment vs. my parent’s strategy of ‘just wash your face more’ in my teens.
      If you have clogged pores you want to treat immediately I’d just do an at-home treatment – do you have blackheads or whiteheads? For whiteheads or under the skin zits I swear by the super cheap de la cruz sulfur treatment. Put a think layer on clean skin, leave on for 30-minutes, and then use a light essence or moisturizer to moisturize. If you have a niacinamide product, I’d layer that on to as it will also help with the redness – the maelove one is great. If you have blackheads I’d use the pore clearing method below.
      https://fiftyshadesofsnail.com/2015/03/28/how-to-shrink-pores-temporarily-plus-3-pore-myths/

    2. Get a facial with a light peeling element. And switch to mineral sunscreen for your face.

      1. Am I the only one who has acne break outs with mineral products? I’ve tried Colorscience and Bare Minerals, and both seem to clog my pores. Oddly, I can use most other products like Oil of Olay (still love the original formula with added SPF as a low cost option), Clinique, Bobbi Brown, and even Blue Lizard on my face with no exacerbation of acne.

        1. Me! And I don’t consider myself acne-prone at all, but mineral sunscreens and makeup have always been problematic for my skin.

        2. I totally break out with mineral products, I think it clogs my pores? I personally love supergoops unseen sunscreen and wear it daily with no issues

      2. There are a few of us on here who love the Biossance SPF – it’s zinc based. It’s so nice. Doesn’t break me out. I tried TONS of sunscreens before settling on this one so I highly recommend it.

        All the drugstore ones may be effective but they tend not to be as thoughful about what they use for the base lotion. The Biossance is both a moisturizer and a sunscreen for me.

    3. If the acne has mostly subsided but you still have clogged pores and acne marks, might I recommend microdermabrasion facials? The microderm will help with scarring to a degree, and the facial will de-gunk the clogged pores. Going forward, I really like Neutrogena’s Clear Face suncreen, I find it’s not nearly as pore-cloggy as the others.

  9. My kiddo is using a mineral sunscreen at daycare (Banana Boat Kids mineral variety — it’s used by all the kids) and I’ve noticed that it’s leaving a white film on her face even after her bath at night. Her skin seems noticeably rougher and drier, too. Is there a better way to get rid of the residue because clearly her kids’ bath wash isn’t cutting it? I probably could send a different type of sunscreen, but I know that’s a pain for the teachers to manage/DD to remember to use/etc.

    1. I have to use a mineral one as well and it is more physically blocking for lack of a better term. So, I put a moisturizer under it. It doesn’t seem to change its efficacy as mineral ones usually aren’t absorbed and more lay on top to protect. It seems to come off with soap. What about trying a face wash made for taking off make up but is still gentle? Clinique?

    2. Have you tried something like wiping her face with witch hazel on a cotton ball after washing?

    3. You need to double cleanse. We can’t scrub my son’s skin (dry skin/eczema) and this is the only way we get alllll the sunblock off. Micellar water will work, but I prefer the Asian oil based first cleansers – they go on dry skin, you rub them all over, and then they emulsify and wash right off with water. I just buy the Innisfree green apple oil cleanser in bulk because it’s super gentle if you get it in your eyes, and the pump is easy to use. BanilaCo also makes a great cleansing balm, and Cosrx just launched a cleansing balm that should be pretty affordable. You then use soap/face wash after.

      1. I think you’re right that double-cleansing is the way to go. I’ll give that a shot. I have some oil cleanser that’s effective but man, it stinks! (Burt’s Bees)

        1. Frankly that’s also the reason I use the (slightly more expensive) green apple cleanser on my son. It smells just like a green apple jolly rancher which means he likes it, which means it’s not a fight to get him to use it! It also emulsifies REALLY fast/easily. Jolse has the best prices I’ve seen online.

      2. +1, I just double cleanse my son’s face with the same oil cleanser I use for myself (DHC). Works great.

      3. I agree that this is the answer. Though I now avoid the ones that have vinyl among the ingredients (I think Banila does).

    5. This may sound dumb, but I’ve been shocked by the number of people I’ve seen admit they only use hands to clean – have you scrubbed with soap and rough wash cloth?

      1. I have, but she really doesn’t like the sensation of the washcloth. I think it’s inevitable that we need to use it to help things along, though.

      2. My skin is WAY too sensitive for scrubbing or washcloths. I have to pat, pat at most when I exfoliate, or I will regret it.

        1. I have extremely sensitive skin but I don’t feel like I get it clean my hands only. I’ve been using a balm cleanser and a makeup eraser brand cloth and I can get all my sunscreen, makeup etc off pretty easily. I thought the makeup eraser was a bit of a … marketing gimmick I guess, but I bought one on a rec here and it really works.

          Good balm cleansers are Banila or Clinique take the day off. Inkey list makes a less expensive Oat balm cleanser. I’m currently using Glow Recipe Papaya Sorbet balm because I’m bougie.

          For a balm in a pot please use a clean scooper to get it out because the pot will last a long time and you don’t want to introduce bacteria from your fingers.

  10. Reposting from afternoon thread in case others have thoughts!

    I’m starting out a new consulting role after leaving my full time job, and I would love suggestions for any good (ideally free) time-tracking apps to help with billing. Ideally, I’m looking for something that can support multiple timers (for different projects) and convert time into a format that is somewhat easily invoiceable. I’ve been trying out Toggl, which has good timer functionality, but it seems hard to export time entries into a file or an invoice, and I’d love to shortcut that process if possible.

    If anyone has used an app they like, I’d love any recommendations!

  11. I need some help finding some cute summer shoes for wearing with sundresses. In past years I wore wedge sandals, but after a year and a half of wearing exclusively flip flops and sneakers, my feet aren’t quite ready for the height wedges I have (and haven’t tried/found cute shorter wedges). I need some decent support, so I can’t wear any of the sandals that just have flat leather soles, but the comfy/supportive sandals I’ve found aren’t really cute enough for a nice dinner out.

    1. I need good supportive shoes as well and Vionic and Noat are my go to for sandals. I’m not sure what’s not cute enough for dinner out, but the Noat Judith stood up to walking several miles for me.

      1. I’m like 90% Naot at this point. You have to hunt through the styles because lots of them are fugly, but they are so well made and my feet are super happy in them.

    2. Dansko usually has some options if you like that Swedish Hasbeens look. Otherwise I’d check Aerosoles and Vionic.

    3. May not be what you’re looking for, but Bzees Secret is the most comfortable shoe ever. I have 3 colors.

    6. I bought flatforms from Nisolo a couple months ago and I really like them! Flattering with pants, shorts and dresses.

    8. Wardrobe Oxygen did a sandals round up sometime in the past 2 week that had lots of cute flat options. They were for wide feet but most had regular width options. I was sorely tempted :)

    9. I have a pair of Sorel sandals that I love. I believe it’s the Ella style? I don’t usually go for flat styles, but these have enough support and cushion that they haven’t given my feet too much trouble.

  12. Guys,

    We will hopefully be in NYC 6 days in early July, including the 4th. Kids have never been, husband and I will be visiting after 10y. We’re vegetarian and I’d really appreciate food suggestions. We will be staying near Bryant Park.

    Please also hit me up with all your tourist suggestions. Thanks in advance.
    PS – we will be fully masked regardless of whether others are or not.

    1. I think that kids like the circle line boat tour around NYC and going by the Intrepid and being able to see the Statue of Liberty. There was a roof bar area at the MMA which my nephew really liked (and any snacks = good).

      1. Personally, I would skip the boat tour but still take a boat ride, the Staten Island Ferry. I love that this is working public transportation for so many people. My kids really like it.

        2. I am bridge-and-tunnel, but you can go on the NY Waterway Ferry from NJ and it goes from Weehawken right past the Intrepid. I just love seeing that ship.

    2. This will depend on your kids, but try to make it to Dirt Candy. They have outdoor seating but no kids menu. The food is incredible.

      Also all the touristy areas are basically empty right now, to the extent that it’s kind of creepy.

      1. +1 to Midtown being somewhat empty. Most offices haven’t reopened. So my Brooklyn neighborhood looks the same as ever (busy, crowded) but I’m at my office in Times Square today, and it is relatively deserted. But Bruce Springsteen’s show on Broadway is reopening in July (tickets go on sale today at 12:30 FYI!), and more shows are coming on in August, so I think that will start to change.

    3. Six days give you a lot of time to explore! Friends with kids love Governor’s Island, Teardrop Park, Domino Park, and Brooklyn Bridge Park. The Ancient Playground next to The Met is also fun. I think all have good water features, which is key in the summer!

      The NYC Ferry is great and way cheaper than the Circle Line cruises. You could make a Brooklyn Day out of the Brooklyn Children’s Museum, the Brooklyn Museum, and the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens, all of which are pretty close to one another. There are plenty of vegetarian dining options on Franklin Ave right there. A trip to the Bronx Zoo and then to Little Italy at Arthur Avenue for lunch could also be great.

      1. eh, there is so much to do in nyc, that i don’t think the Bronx zoo is worth a trip, assuming you have a zoo where you live

      2. Brooklyn Bridge Park’s Pier 6 is pretty great – the Water Lab in particular. You can make a day of it by walking around DUMBO or going up to the Transit Museum (check if they are open), which is great for the young and bus/train obsessed.
        Governor’s Island is fun but there is very little shade and it is big – don’t go when it is blazing hot, and rent bikes. The Yard adventure playground there is really cool for school age kids. You might be happier just going to Central park though, as that will be easier to get to from midtown.

    4. How old are your kids? Mommypoppins.com is a good resource for kids activities and attractions.

    5. Museum of the Moving Image is super fun for kids and doable in partial day, then Omonia Cafe for desserts! Also, just hanging out on the subway for a ride might be fun for the kids! They might also like the Staten Island ferry for the boat ride and foe the views! Oh, and if they’re young, give them a dollar or two at the dollar pizza spots and let them feel grownup ordering their own slice!

    6. I’m not sure where they’re launching the fireworks from this year, but find out (I think it’s recently been in the east river off of barges). Then figure out where you can go to put down a blanket and see them.

      There are a lot of good Indian restaurants off 6th street near Tompkins Square Park that are easy for vegetarians. Little Italy isn’t really alive anymore, but there’s another neighborhood in the Bronx you might check out: Arthur Avenue.

      NYC beaches obviously aren’t world class, but I think it’s fun to go anyway. I’d probably go down to Brighton Beach/Coney Island. There are neat Russian/east European/central Asian restaurants with patios, a little old-school amusement park, and an aquarium, plus a pretty gentle (if cold) beach. The subway ride in on the B or the Q would take a while, but the second half is above ground and has some cool views.

    7. vegetarian – Souen (several locations around city), Candle 79 or their sister restaurants. Bryant Park is right by K-town but I always think of meat for Korean food, but I’m sure there are vegetarian options.

      for kids – if they’re under 7 try pier 6, shark boat tour, brooklyn children’s museum — we were bored by governor’s island at that age, although the boat was fun.

      all ages – museums, temple of dendur at the met. central park.

      1. If your kids are adventurous eaters and old/mature enough for a quiet restaurant, Hangawi is an amazing vegetarian Korean place in K Town. Souen is macrobiotic, so veggie, but not for everyone. Superiority Burger is amazing, but currently only open for takeout Thursday-Sunday. Taim is my favorite falafel, with a few locations downtown.

  13. What’s your favorite drugstore eye cream, specifically for dark circles?
    I was using a cerave retinol serum before but now that its run out I’m thinking of switching it up.

    2. I’m not following instructions, but chiming it to say I really like the Jones Road Eye Cream. Also I have the cerave eye cream which is fine.

    3. After spending $$$$ on products and services for dark circles over the years – I have come to accept that topical products will not “fix” dark circles. The closest you can get is a light-reflecting cream, which will act sort of like a non-tinted concealer to camouflage some of the darkness. Olay makes a pretty good one, though it’s not much cheaper than Ole Hendriksen Banana Bright or Origins Gin-zing, which are both more effective and smell better, in my opinion!

      2. Yep, this is correct.

        I also like the reusable silicone eye masks from Dieux (not drugstore but not hard to buy online) to calm down any puffiness in the morning. I put an eye cream or moisturizer on, then pop these over that for about 5 min and then we’re good.

        For really discolored dark circles, first of all a cream won’t help – they’re genetic and have to do with thinner skin in that area. To camouflage, the best one-two punch is a color corrector (Bobbi Brown sells a good one, I also have one from Jouer) and then a light reflecting concealer like Trish Mcevoy instant eye lift. I usually don’t do both unless it’s something major like a zoom presentation or being photographed.

      3. I thought this too, but I have found that lots and lots of hydration, regardless of which lotion it comes from makes a significant difference on dark circles I thought were hereditary

        1. Hey Desi Girl, you might really like the Dieux eye masks then. They really help that moisturizer sink in and they’re reusable forever. I found out about them on tik tok and they’re from an independent skincare company. I love them.

      1. I like Becca Under Eye Brightening Concealer, which I saw recommended here a couple of years ago.

        1. Do I need to wear this with foundation or other makeup that covers the rest of the face?

    5. Someone here recently recommended the Nature Republic greek yogurt blueberry mask/moisturizer for dark undereye circles. It actually helps. I’ve tried tons of different products and so I wasn’t expecting much, but this is great. A retinol is also a good idea, but try to get something Rx if you can – I use Curology.

  14. Any super lightweight (maybe bamboo material?) bras or bralettes you all recommend for hot weather? My b**b sweat is out of control this year. Thanks.

    2. The Jockey bralettes are my favorite. They aren’t made with cottony materials, so good for sweat.

    5. Doesn’t stop sweat, but if odor is an issue, Lume deodorant is awesome. It can be used anywhere on the body. I’ve been using it for over a year.

  15. Are lululemon align leggings worth it? I especially like the diamond dye color and am considering buying a pair, but I have read that they pill. What makes them so great for $100 leggings, and am I going to regret buying a pair?

    1. They are buttery soft. I have a few pairs I wore almost every day while working from home the past year. I love them.
      They are high cut, like above my belly button, but I am short. They are light enough for a hot summer. I wouldn’t wear them for warmth. I didn’t have any pilling, it doesn’t seem like the type of fabric that would pill, but maybe? I buy them on sale. I am not sure I would buy them full price, but only because I know they will ultimately come on sale. If they never went on sale, I’d buy full price.

    3. I wish they weren’t so great, but I absolutely love mine.

      Yes, I’m sure there are dupes people like… but they’re so comfy, they look good, they fit me so well… they’re the pair that I look for in the wash.

    4. I work out daily and 100% the lulu ones last longer and wear better than the cheap ones. It doesn’t stop me from continuing to buy and try cheap ones (colorfulkoala are my second choice right now), but lulu are really good. Alo ones may be the best though.

    5. It’s the fabric that you’re paying for – it feels better, stretches better, looks better, fits better IMO. It matters to me but doesn’t matter to everyone.

    6. The Aligns that I wore for full days during the winter with sweaters have pilled like crazy. The Aligns that I only wear for an hour or two while working out are in great condition.

    7. I have 12 pairs and they are my fave. They feel like you aren’t wearing pants! They do not compress or hold you in at all though.

    8. Yes, wearing them right now and they’re the only kind I buy at this point. I like that they are super soft and have no compression. I usually find them on sale pretty easily to get them at least $20-$30 cheaper. Mine haven’t pilled, but I don’t have that problem with any pants.

  16. Can someone talk me into/out of buying this? particularly the jacket, although pants in this color won’t go amiss for me either. My sartorial choices have varied from totally amazing or absolutely terrible, so I don’t trust myself and am trying to avoid the latter :)

    If it matters, I’m similar in coloring to the model and am a 5′ 2″ ~115lbs hourglass.

        1. Concur. I am 5’6″, size 2, and would still be completely overwhelmed by this jacket.

        2. Agree, sadly. I’m about your size (a little heavier) and I fear this jacket would wear me instead of the other way around.

      2. Maybe if you’re constantly in heels it might work? I’m 5’4 and hate heels and thus would not buy this. The model is 5’9 and I almost think it would be more flattering on her if she were 5’11!

        1. Heels won’t help. You have to be tall all over like CJ Cregg to get away with something like this.

    3. Hmm I don’t know if a long blazer like that would look great on somebody short? It might look kind of overwhelming or like a kid playing dress up proportion-wise.

    6. I have never liked a single thing from that brand in person. Terrible quality for the price point.

  17. Any wisdom or ideas planning my honeymoon?
    My fiancé and I are getting married Oct. 1st 2022, and after buying our house this year, we are starting fresh building up our savings. My folks are helping out with the wedding, but we’ll be paying for our honeymoon, which we’d like to be special, as we have not gotten to travel abroad together (or much at all) since he’s been a student the 4 years we’ve been together.
    We’re thinking a multi-country trip in Europe, maybe a river cruise? Would appreciate y’alls experiences with honeymoon planning and budgeting (bearing in mind that travel restrictions are hard to predict right now, but a girl can dream!).

    1. I’d carefully research the river cruises. Most of the passengers are likely to be older than your parents.

      1. +1

        Consider your travel styles, too. DH and I vastly prefer a one- or two- “base” vacation where we can rent an apartment and have a mix of touristy activities as well as just downtime. We can pick up pastries and yogurt for breakfast in (and enjoy a glass of wine or two on our own balcony before dinner) which also saves money vs. a hotel or eating out for every meal. With a cruise you are on. a. schedule. and can fit in only a blitz of touristy highlights each day.

        In your shoes I’d maybe go to Paris for a week and then London for a long weekend… or say, Florence and Tuscany… but if you are a “go go go” type couple you might feel bored that way!

        FWIW our burn rate in Europe is typically about $5-6K for an 8-9 day trip, depending mostly on whether we can find a deal on airfare.

        1. Someone on here mentioned OneFine Stay – I would very much look into a upscale apartment in one or two ‘big’ cities in your preferred spot. I didn’t want to get on a plane more than once (to/from Europe) so we picked a country, then 2 cities that were linked by train. If you’re open to flying in Europe, perhaps pick southern Europe as it’ll be gorgeous in late fall – Rome and Seville? Barcelona and Lisbon? Florence/Rome/Lisbon?

      2. Yeah my husband and I went on a river cruise when I was 60 and he was 71, and we were among the youngest passengers. We were on a Trek bike-tour-within-a-cruise so we had a blast, but the excursions provided as part of the cruise were extremely yawny.

        1. That said, the above was in Europe. One of the best vacations I ever had was a river cruise down the Mekong in Vietnam and Cambodia (although this was 12 years ago when that was brand new — those routes may also have been taken over by the Olds by now).

        2. My parents went on a river cruise in France some years ago and my mother still gets mad when she talks about how they only served California wines on the boat. I don’t know which company it was, but my parents were NOT happy.

          1. Haha! That’s hilarious! I had the opposite experience — the first day I ordered Prosecco because that’s what I order at home, and the bartender said “Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer CHAMPAGNE!?!?!”

      3. Agreed on the River Cruise, although could be lovely. What kind of travel do you like? Italy, France and Greece are the classic choice, but there are fun things to do in Northern Europe too!

        1. I’m very open to ideas – I’ve done a decent amount of travel in that area (UK, Italy, Greece, France) but he has not. I think we’re still in the very early stages of planning and the options seem a bit overwhelming to me (the lack a travel for the last year hasn’t help either!). Maybe that’s why something with a preplanned itinerary is appealing to me at the moment, ha! But I agree, a River Cruise is likely to not be the ideal demographic – though we’re not partiers or anything like that. Wonder if there is anything that is a middle road? Will give it more thought.

          1. Look into a “regular” Mediterranean cruise. Choose one with a departure port that interests you, spend a few days there in a luxe hotel to get over the jet lag and see the sights. The cruise itself will be a lot more flexible than a river cruise in terms of what you do every day. You can choose excursions through the ship, go off on your own (Rick Steves has good guides of the logistics on this), or stay onboard and enjoy spa, etc. November temperatures will be lower, but that makes touring more pleasant if you’re the active type.

      4. A Baltic cruise might work better for what you’re looking for than a river cruise, which I agree skew much older. I haven’t been on one myself, but some friends did it for their honeymoon and only had good things to say about it.

        I’ll cosign the advice to consider a more chill itinerary, even if you are typically more go-go-go travelers. My husband and I planned an active honeymoon, since neither of us is the type to want to snooze on a beach all day. But we both underestimated how mentally/emotionally exhausted we’d be by the time we’d gotten through the final stretch of wedding planning + the wedding itself. We had a blast, and our itinerary certainly wasn’t grueling, but if I had a do-over I would have calmed it down a few more notches. (Obviously that’s not a concern if you aren’t going on your honeymoon right after the wedding, though.)

        1. Think about what sort of mix of activities you’d like. Are you into more urban things (museums, walking around interesting neighborhoods) or more rural (scenery, castles, bike ride through the countryside)? These are of course not mutually exclusive, and some areas offer both, but depending on where you pick, there’ll be more of one or the other. Also, what is your tolerance for other tourists? Pre-pandemic, even off season, major sites in major cities were busy with people from all over the world, and I think by late 2022 this will be true again. But there are tons of fantastic places that just don’t get the publicity and crowds.

        2. I did a Baltic cruise on Viking a few years ago. Viking cruise ships (not river cruises) are smaller than the bigger cruise lines. They don’t have a casino on board, but have an historian and presentations, etc. Awesome spa and great food. No kids under 16. I would say the average age was 60+, but I loved it. Their ships are beautiful and the excursions we did were great.

    2. A River cruise is fantastic if you are 80. I’d buy a bunch of used Rick Steves guides online and browse and see what countries spark your imagination.

    3. If you’re open to waiting until early November it can be a very inexpensive time to travel (since Americans don’t want to travel right before Thanksgiving, in general).

    4. I’ve done some river cruises, admittedly with my parents, but loved them enough I also considered them for my honeymoon. I recommend you go for bike and barge options – bike 3-5 hours a day, and then eat and sleep on the boat. The people on those types of trips might be your parents age, but are generally super awesome! I’ve done two from tripsite.com (Passau to Budapest, and Amsterdam to Brugge), and both were great. They also have options for bike trips where you stay in hotels, and your luggage is magically transported from one hotel to another; many of these can be done on your own, which might be more fun for a honeymoon. Backroads is a bit more expensive, but another option to consider.

    5. I think your honeymoon is the perfect time to do something slow and leisurely like a river cruise. We took a two week cruise around the Caribbean in our 30’s and it was completely full of retired people. Most people can’t take a two week vacation, particularly if they have kids and it is the school year. For us, it was perfect. We didn’t want to socialize with other guests. We dined just the two of us, did our own excursions instead of those offered by the ship and used all the amenities. There was rarely a line at the bar. The bartenders loved us. If you want to really focus on each other, doing things aimed at the “olds” is a great way.

    6. I had an eastern Sicily trip I was supposed to take last May that got (obviously) cancelled, so I’m just going to throw it in here in case you want a pre-planned trip that is already thoroughly well-researched!

      Fly into Catania, rent a car, and drive ~45 mins to Agriturismo Tenuta San Michele, on a winery with a well-reviewed restaurant. Chill for a few days there – if you’re adventurous, use as a base to explore Mt. Etna, Taormina, and the rest of northeastern Sicily. But if you just want to decompress, drink some wine and read by the pool.

      After a few days, decamp to an AirBnB in Ortigia (the old town of Syracuse). Explore the restaurants and the ruins around there. Take a day trip to the hilltop towns in the southeastern part (Noto, Ragusa, and Modica), or the beaches if the weather cooperates.

      I’ve done the multi-country trips and I totally get the impulse to see as much as possible, but I think you’ll appreciate staying in one place more than checking things off a list! That said, if you want to try to see a few places, I might do a Vienna/day trip to Bratislava/Budapest trip, or Amsterdam/Brussels and do The Hague/Bruges/a day trip to Aachen if you want to get Germany in. If you book far enough in advance the trains are super cheap.

  18. We are in MA where, despite things reopening, most of the 4th of july festivities have been cancelled. Anyone in MA or within an hour of MA (eastern NY, CT, ME, NH, RI) that has fun 4th festivities? A parade, fireworks, that sort of thing?

    1. Are the Boston fireworks cancelled? I hadn’t heard either way for this summer and was wondering.

      1. No official word yet. I live right next to the Esplanade where they are held and general sentiment in the neighborhood is that they are likely to still be on.

    2. Bristol RI is 4th of July CENTRAL!

      And inspired by yesterday’s small town thread, it’s basically Stars Hollow by the Sea! I lived there for several years in my early 20s and its just lovely.

  19. Question for anyone, but particularly lawyers: How did you get in to writing articles/etc, appearing on panels, giving CLEs, etc? I went in house in to public service before COVID started, and there obviously weren’t a lot of conferences going on, and I didn’t have time as a parent to be writing much on the side. Would it be weird to ask my external counsel to keep me on the roster if a relevant panel comes up? I co-wrote a few pieces early in my career in private practice, but they’re not necessarily accurate anymore because of changes in law, and I think my government employer might not want me espousing on court cases or proposed legislation.

    I’m currently getting the CAIA charter (for investment professionals in alternatives), and I think that may result in more opportunities, but I’m not sure where to start now without being pushy.

    1. Not at all weird! As external counsel I love the opportunity to bring in someone from business.

    3. Does your firm participate in your local ACC chapter events? In many cases firms have to have in-house counsel on the panel to be able to present, and would love to have someone raise their hand!

        1. Darn. I don’t think I could join: ACC membership is open to individuals who are engaged in the active practice of law employed by organizations in either the private or public sector, do not have regulatory, enforcement or policymaking responsibilities nor work in an institution with such authority, and do not hold themselves out to the public for the practice of law. Eligible positions include full-time in-house and contract attorneys on a long-term placement. Please review the full eligibility requirements.

      2. We’re a government agency, so I’m not sure we’re eligible for ACC. But that’s a good idea to look in to it, or find a couple friends who are in it and may know of calls for speakers. I’m in sort of a weird place because what I do is really investment management/alternative investments, but I do it on the public side. So the public lawyer bars aren’t really relevant to me, and I’m not really in-house corporate counsel, either.

    4. NBI (National Business Institute) is always desperate for speakers. They have called me to cover topics I have only encountered in one or two cases and they still wanted me to speak about it. I bet you call them up and they would let you speak about anything you wanted to at their CLEs.

    5. Talk to folks at your various local bar associations. They probably put on CLEs and would be DELIGHTED to have you pitch an idea. If the various committees don’t produce articles, there may be other people there who are interested in writing something with you.

    6. Hopefully not too late, but if you are at a pension there will be plenty of opportunities because you won’t be considered a vendor. I organize these sorts of things and would be happy to talk to you if you have a burner email. Otherwise, check out:
      – annual investment conferences hosted by private fund practices or similar at law firms
      – trade associations
      – affinity groups like Women in Funds, 100 Women in Finance
      – commercial conferences in your vertical
      There is a movement to be more diverse in speaker sourcing that you can use to your advantage. The virtual environment also makes it much easier (logistically) to participate.
      CAIA is also fantastic (I’m a member) although they don’t tend to do too much on the legal side.

  20. I am returning to the office next week. We will be having a cookout outside, and I plan to wear wide-leg ankle-lengh pants. I know it is recommended to wear pointed toe shoes that show some of the top of your foot and ankle. Pumps are recommended, but most I see have a very narrow heel that will sink into the grass. What shoes would you wear with wide-leg ankle pants for outdoor eents on grass?

    1. No shoe recommendations but if you want to wear your pumps, check out GoGoHeel stoppers, which are little clear platforms that help keep your heel from sinking in to grass.

    4. If you are standing, how is the answer not Rothys? I feel like they do better than most shoes outside and if you are standing. I have pants like these and would only wear Rothys or Swedish Has-Beens with them, but OMG not actual pumps ever.

      1. This. I have 4 pairs of the Rothys points for these kinds of things – school events held on grass, conferences in Vegas/Orlando where it will be sweltering/rainy/or I have to walk miles. I don’t care if they’re ‘out’, they serve a purpose and look nicer than most of the other supportive shoes I’ve seen.

        1. FWIW, I think the pandemic killed my will to care about whether something is in or out. Sometimes, certain clothing items just serve a practical purpose and that’s OK! As long as they’re well kept and reasonably attractive, I cannot care anymore.

    6. I would wear whatever pair of flats I had that I didn’t mind ruining. Grass can be lovely, but can also = mud and stains, especially if it rained in the last couple of days.

    7. “I know it is recommended to wear pointed toe shoes that show some of the top of your foot and ankle. Pumps are recommended”

      Huh? Who is recommending this for an outside cookout?

      1. I think it’s a flattery thing. Wide leg pants are probably more flattering with some ankle/foot/leg showing. I think you can accomplish the same with flats or sandals though. That’s why yesterday’s big red suit (which was fabulous) was shown with open toed shoes.

  21. Need a gut check: My husband is on the board of our local social/business club, and they are remodeling the ladies’ room to replace the stalls with cubicles that are completely enclosed from floor to ceiling (yay!). They want to put some piece of art in each stall. One idea is to have portraits of famous women (in the arts and sciences) from our town, along with a line or two of biographical data. Is this cool, or would it be weird to have somebody’s photo in the room where you’re doing your business? And if you were one of the subjects, would you be honored or insulted?

    1. I say cool. I love having something to read. If you’re worried about offending, may choose historical subjects?

      1. I’d also say historical subjects only. Otherwise it feels a little offensive.

        What’s happening in the men’s room?

        1. Men’s room has historical photos of the construction of the Empire State Building. (Which were in our bathroom at home until we tore it up for the remodel LOL)

    2. Errr I don’t know. I probably wouldn’t notice who they were if they’re above the toilet (bc who stands and faces the toilet for long in a ladies room?), and if they’re on the door, people’s purses will be banging into them.

    3. I just think it would be hard to clean and a germ fest sooner or later. So no, as a maintenance issue. Maybe on the bathroom door so the W is distinguished from the M room?

    4. I do think it would be weird to hang portraits, but quotes would work and have a similar feel.

    5. I would include women of color, transgender women, nonbinary people, etc. If the organization won’t be inclusive, I’d not do this at all. Also, if restrooms are being remodeled, putting t@mpon and p@d holders in all bathrooms would be a great idea too. (Yes, I know this may lead to some eye rolls here but your eye rolls aren’t worth more than someone else’s safety.)

      1. Why would it be unsafe to put tampon and pad dispensers in bathrooms? I think I may be missing something.

        1. I think the safety concern is not having them in the stalls individually and instead out in the open.

          1. Oh sorry, I read this wrong. I would suggest putting them in the stalls and not out in the open part of the bathroom for safety reasons.

          2. Just to make sure I understand your suggestion, are you saying have the dispensers in the individual stalls in the men’s room too so that if someone is FTM they can access the dispenser without the other men in the restroom knowing they are FTM? I apologize if I am misunderstanding the safety risk.

      2. I think that my husband would promptly exit such a bathroom, thinking that he had wandered into the wrong one (and then be very confused and probably hold it when he shouldn’t). I think you need to make your signage very clear for the men who will truly not know what to make of this.

      3. Wait, seriously? I’m all for inclusion, but I hate the sanitary product dispensers in all bathrooms (that’s why I carry a purse). I can’t imagine a men’s room with those.

        1. Sanitary product dispensers are useless. They are always empty or broken, and no one would want to use the crummy products anyway. Doesn’t everyone carry their own products?

      4. We have a gender-neutral family/disabled bathroom with tampon and pad holders so I think we’re good there.

        And yes was going to be inclusive but I’m sort of out of the mood to do it at all, although I like the quotes idea above.

    6. Where are the portraits of the famous men from your town? If the men’s urinal and toilets also have famous locals – fine.

      If the famous men are hanging in the board room, hallway, dining room or club rooms – you have your answer…

    7. Ewww. Both from a cleanliness standpoint, and it doesn’t seem very reverent to have your picture in a bathroom stall!

      1. I don’t get this. How is this any harder to wipe down and clean than anything else in a bathroom? No one is licking pictures in bathrooms . . . Hell, who is TOUCHING art in bathrooms?

        1. This. In Nashville and the surrounds, basically every public bathroom (from the dive bars to the nice ones) has ads on the door of the stall. It would never occur to me that it’s dirty.

    8. I wouldn’t like it either as a bathroom user or honoree. If they must have art in the stalls I’d go with landscapes or still life’s or abstract.

    9. Tbh, if I were one of the subjects (or close friends/family with a subject), I would be put off. If this is a social/business club where there are non-bathroom places to honor important people, it would feel like an insulting suggestion that I/other women don’t merit full honors, just poop-closet honors.

    10. Honestly, it does feel like relegating the ladies to lady spaces. Like a bit disrespectful, I’d rather a display in public spaces because men need to learn about awesome women too.

    11. I think if the photos weren’t massive (i.e. looming) and well as not eye-level when you’re seated, beautifully matted and framed, it would be great. Also, if the bathroom reads more “upscale” than utilitarian I think that would help any potential offence.
      If you’re concerned, why not hang them somewhere else besides in the stall? By the sinks?

    12. I’m curious what the push is for art in EACH stall. I’ve obviously seen art in bathrooms before (although more in the waiting area/dressing area space of them than in the actual do your business part), but the “art” I ususaly see in bathroom stalls is advertisements for things (hard pass).

      I would ixnay the ladies in stalls ideas and, like others have already mentioned, take those ladies out in public where they can be appreciated by everyone. Art for stalls can be photographs of pretty or historic local areas – done.

    13. So now I am about ready to go to war for doing this but out in the public areas…

      Thanks for confirming my gut!

      1. Yes, definitely go out in the public areas. Women deserve better than to be relegated to the bathroom where only women will see them. Good luck!

    14. You know would be fun, but probably still a bad idea? If you had really beautiful portraits of the women with their accomplishments in a public area, and then in the bathroom, you had (beautifully shot) “candid” photos of the same women (looking angry/tired/”normal”) and some kind of “inner voice” quote from them. Like a public/private persona thing!

      But to your actual question, agreed. I don’t think a bathroom stall is the place for art. If they want to make it look nice, put some kind of beautiful tile or wallpaper on the back wall (above the generous shelf on which to rest one’s items) and put the artwork on the wall opposite the sinks. Or better yet, in the newly renovated lounge area where ladies can sit on a luxurious bench or touch up their makeup at a flatteringly-lit vanity.

        1. So my office just completed a restroom renovation and the most brilliant thing was adding shelf within easy reach of the toilet in the stall so you can put your pads/tampons there (no more reaching all the way front to your purse or balancing items precariously on top of toilet paper rolls) or phone (lol).

        2. Please don’t put the generous shelf somewhere that the purse or bag or whatever will drop directly into the toilet if it’s too big for the shelf. Ask me how I know this!

          1. This is why I NEVER use a shelf above the toilet. Have not made that mistake; do not want to. Put it on the wall on the same side of the door hinge.

    15. Not responsive to the decor question but: As someone who has gotten locked into a bathroom stall before and had to crawl out under the door, the idea of floor to ceiling doors give me the shudders. Also, there can be safety concerns; sexual assaults in restrooms are not uncommon, and a private, locking area inside a somewhat public space could increase the risk.

    16. I wouldn’t be offended or creeped out, I would just think it is a waste. Is it going to be low on the door? Or over the toilet — because there is no way I am hovering over a toilet to inspect a piece of art, much less do any reading. It is one thing to have art in a private bathroom where you are washing our hands or attending to other things, but in a public space, I am getting in and out of the stall as quickly as possible.

    17. The nicest thing you can do in a ladies room is to have a mirror space separate from the sinks with flattering lighting (the lighting is key here)

      1. +1000. I don’t care about floor to ceiling doors or artwork in the stall, but I do appreciate a place to freshen-up, fix my make-up, etc.

    18. I say cool to have if I’m the one using the restroom. Maybe weird if I’m the one whose photo is in the restroom. Maybe this honor can be posthumously awarded?

  22. Traditionally, dress code at my office has been business casual. For return to the office, we are being encouraged to wear company swag like hats and t-shirts. We have not been given polo shirts. I’ve never worn a t-shirt with dress pants. What would you wear in this situation?

  23. For those who are cusp size (14-16), what clothing rental services have you enjoyed?

  24. Idk where to complain about this in real life, so doing it here.
    I’ve wanted to go to a psychiatrist for depression / suspected ADHD and I’ve been looking around for one – just spoke to one office and its $400 per session, do not take insurance! I really don’t mind paying for medical things usually, I have decent insurance, I make good money . . . but that is an insane amount to pay fully out of pocket. I don’t need a psychiatrist at that rate.
    Not to scare people off – you can definitely find talk therapy at a much lower rate, covered by insurance. And PCPs can prescribe psych meds (thats what I do right now). It’s just going to an actual psychiatrist thats hard.

    2. I feel for you, but also “do not take insurance” means “will not submit your claim to the insurance company.” Any provider, I think, will provide you with a statement that you can submit to your insurance company. It just needs to have the appropriate diagnosis and treatment codes and you’re good to go. Annoying, certainly, but better than nothing. I did it for years.

      1. +1 none of my providers ‘take insurance’ what they really mean is ‘we don’t do paperwork’. I’ve been able to just do the work myself for the claim.

      2. You can submit a claim to insurance, but it will be covered as out-of-network rather than in-network, which typically makes your out-of-pocket costs much higher. On my plan, there is a separate deductible for out-of-network services that would take quite a few $400 visits to hit. After the deductible, I pay a larger percentage of allowable charges for out-of-network services than for in-network services, and I am also responsible for the difference between the billed amount and what the insurance company defines as allowable.

    3. I found it easier to find an in-network psychiatrist (MD) than a therapist under my insurance. Ask your friends and coworkers if they know someone. That’s how we got in, a personal referral. I was just complaining in the break room how no one would even return my call and one of my coworkers swung by later with the name and number of someone who was miraculously in-network and able to get me in the next week, all because I name dropped my friend.

      Alternatively, ask your GP for a referral.

    4. depending on your insurance company, I know Blue Cross where I am is doing psychiatric telehealth appts. Its how I was able to get a diagnosis and on medication. Your best bet may be starting with your insurer or local hospital group.

  25. Consider this an SOS post of desperation. Here’s the sitch:

    (1) I work in a business casual office – uniform was squarely gray/black/neutral variety sheath dresses and sometimes pants/top. It’s finance. Lots of men, not a trendy kind of place.
    (2) I’m 5’8″ and usually a size 10-12, trending 12. Athletic my whole life (until the last two years basically – I’ll get back there someday.
    (3) I’m currently a size…. 14? 16? Biggest I’ve been in my whole life. I’m so uncomfortable. Fertility treatments (see below) are destroying my body, appetite, motivation to workout and will to basically do anything (yes, I have a call in to a therapist). I’m painfully bloated like 90% of the time.
    (4) I’ve been in fertility treatments for two years for child #2. Most recent cycle failed yesterday. I wish this on not my worst enemy.
    (5) I’ve been WFH like everyone else gleefully living in yoga pants but I’m just back to the office this week 3 days/week. I was hopeful this IVF cycle would work and I could just skate by with my few outfits that fit a few weeks before needing maternity clothes, but big fat nope there.
    (6) I’m so uncomfortable in my own skin, and my own clothes, especially/most concerningly work clothes. I’m client facing and have got to get my act together. I’ve decided I can’t wait to get pregnant to make myself comfortable in my clothes. Going to work on losing weight / regaining control of that as well, but I need to fix my clothes and now.

    Struck out at Loft, Jcrew, BR. Got some shell tops at Ann Taylor but I’m so sick of cardigans over a sleeveless shell. Where can I get some comfortable pants and dresses to get me through the summer? I have the Karen Kane wrap on today and I’m lumpy as holy h e l l and feeling absolutely terrible about myself. Help fix this otherwise super bada s s business woman / fertility failure out? Please? Links? I’m so broken on a lot of fronts and I’d like my outward appearance to look crisp as much as possible at least.

    1. I’m sorry you’re going through this. It sounds like hell.

      A lot of us like the Eileen Fisher slim crepe ankle pants. I wear mine with a flowy top as I carry some weight in my belly. I like to top with a more casual jacket or longer cardigan but it depends on what works for your workplace or body type. The nice thing about these pants is that they will still fit you as you lose the weight, but not be uncomfortable now.

      I think you should post in the afternoon thread for more ideas.

      HUGS

    2. I want to give you a hug, friend. It sucks to be dealing with fertility treatments. It sucks to feel uncomfortable in your body. Infertility does such a number on your mind and spirit, in addition to your body.

      I found some stretchy dresses at BR recently that can be dressed up with a blazer, but I had to order online. No recommendations for good pants, unfortunately. In-person retail seems to be a wasteland for this.

    3. A big, big hug.

      Brooks Brothers has amazing sales right now. Nicer quality fabrics drape better; the quality of AT etc these days is so dismal that the only flatter IG models.

      If Amazon still sells the Vasserette spin slips, they help reduce lumps and are super comfy.

    4. Talbots. Their stuff is generally cut in a flattering and forgiving way, and they a very big size range. Plus they have a lot on sale right now. Quality is decent and will at least get you feeling kind about yourself again.

      1. +1 — walk by all the bright colours — they have black/grey/navy — if you don’t see them in the store, go to the website — you can return things in the store that you don’t want so easy, peasy.
        — they have limited styles in tall, but regular may be ok at 5’8″ — order a few sizes and styles to try.

      2. +1
        I am 5’9″ and when I was post-partum working in a law firm, I wore the heck out of Talbots sheath dresses because they aren’t so form-fitting but still appropriate business attire. I also like their blazers. I recommend blazers in general over cardigans for in-between sizing because they give you more shape and conceal the tummy area–no one gets a full side-view of the belly in profile.

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