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Splurge Monday’s Workwear Report: Button-Down Merino Wool Polo

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A woman wearing a pink long sleeve polo blouse from Joseph

Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I’m absolutely loving the color of this begonia-pink merino wool polo from Joseph. Kat did a roundup of her favorite merino wool sweaters last week and noted that this type of knit has the benefit of being warm, but not bulky.

I would wear this with a midi skirt for a fun business casual look.

The sweater is $395 at Neiman Marcus and comes in sizes XXS-XL.

Sales of note for 3/21/25:

  • Nordstrom – Spring sale, up to 50% off: Free People, AllSaints, AG, and more
  • Ann Taylor – 25% off suiting + 25% off tops & sweaters + extra 50% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Eloquii – $39+ dresses & jumpsuits + up to 50% off everything else
  • J.Crew – 25% off select linen & cashmere + up to 50% off select styles + extra 40% off sale
  • J.Crew Factory – Friends & Family Sale: Extra 15% off your purchase + extra 50% off clearance + 50-60% off spring faves
  • M.M.LaFleur – Flash Sale: Get the Ultimate Jardigan for $198 on sale; use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – Buy 1 get 1 50% off everything, includes markdowns

200 Comments

  1. I want to buy a wood bathtub caddy on which I can place my iPad so that I can read in the bath. How dangerous is this (in terms of the iPad falling into the water)? Are these caddies stable? Seeking any and all suggestions/warnings. TIA.

    1. I bought one off Etsy from Redhead Woods about 5 years ago and we haven’t had any problems with it (either the product or accidental iPad death). You can customize the length of the caddy according to the widest part of your bathtub. I just use a bit of the same oil for my wood cutting boards every once and a while to keep the wood looking good.

    2. You should be able to get waterproof cases for your ipad as well? My son’s swim lessons use an ipad to take attendance and they have it in some sort of turbo case.

      1. I have a waterproof phone bag from Samsonite. I used it at the Blue Lagoon. Surely there are iPad sized ones!

    3. I purchased one and realized too late that my molded bathtub wouldn’t accommodate the caddy- I bought an adjustable one that is flat and straight that would hold a book/tablet and beverage. The interior side of my bathtub is slightly higher than the exterior side, so I needed to prop it up. Ended up not being super sturdy and therefore not worth it. Plus, if you ever refill the bath while in it, like adding more hot water, there’s likely to be some splash. Honestly, I would just consider purchasing a sleeve for the tablet that you can still scroll through to turn pages and keeping a towel nearby for drying your hand if needed.

    4. Just get a waterproof iPAD case too and you’ll be all set! (They make some that are like ziplock bags but with better visibility maybe touchscreen function, though I’ve never tried a ziplock bag to compare.)

    5. The iPad case is probably cheaper but if visibility is a problem (I don’t know) there is a waterproof Kindle.

      1. If you don’t want a bulky waterproof case, you can also put yours in a gallon ziplock bag while in the tub. I did that for years with no issues.

    6. I have one (gift from ILs, they got it from Amazon) and I have never had my Kindle go for a spontaneous swim – and I move the thing up and down the bathtub all the time to accommodate my space needs as I shave, wash my hair under the tap, etc. Just don’t use it as a support to get in and out and you should be fine!

    7. I have one, the umbra brand I think, and it’s stable. I use my kindle on it without a case.

  2. If you have tan suede boots or booties, how long do they look good for? I have some 2019 Sorrels that are great but have black street funk collecting in the creases along the vamp. Current styles are a bit more out there so I haven’t yet replaced but it’s a B- look. I found some on-sale Aquatalias but I just wonder if tan suede is a futile pursuit. (I do spray to help water and stain resistance, but I tried a brush and eraser in suede and it wrecked the shoes — even if user error, I feel like I don’t know how to keep suede looking great for long for anything used weekly or more often).

    1. The spray isn’t a one and done. You want to do that at the start of each season. A cobbler will be better for cleaning and maintenance. I also limit wear to spring and fall (never snow season) and avoid rainy days or walking in areas with mud. It sounds like a lot but really isn’t.i like the look and it goes with a lot so is worth it to me.

  3. I got a few items off Vinted and they have a slightly musty smell, what’s my best option? I’d put them on the drying line in the garden but it’s so windy, they might end up in Norway… They are silky fabrics so I want to be gentle.

    1. If the item is washable, I swear by borax powder to remove odors (sold as Mule Team borax here in the US).

    2. sunshine works the best…. you could also try spritzing with vodka. Or leave them hanging in your bathroom while it’s steamy (if this isn’t a threat to the fabric).

    3. Nothing works like fresh air in my experience. Can you hang them in a more sheltered spot? Maybe on a porch?

    5. I’ve had luck getting the musty smell out of thrifted clothing adding a bit of white vinegar to the washing machine.

    6. Sunlight helps with must. Though, I’m sure that’s hard to come by in a Scottish winter …

    7. Musty as in mouldy, or just the charity shop smell?

      I’ve tried various methods for various items. Sunshine and air is the most effective. Hanger in the bathroom to steam is also ok.

      I wash silk in the machine in a mesh bag on handwash/wool setting, with wool/silk wash and Vanish gel for wool/silk.

      I’ve had moderate luck with activated charcoal as well. You can get little bags in pet stores, meant for filtering fish tanks.
      Open the bag into a big trash bag, use trash bag as garment bag and lower your item into bag on hanger and shut bag around garment. Don’t let the item touch the carbon.

      Vodka sprayed/misted will help with fresh bacteria, but I don’t know if it works on silk or if the liquid might stain.

    8. For items that can’t be washed I have had luck with putting them in a bag with some unscented cat litter for a few days.
      For washable items, I soak them for an hour or two in cold water and washing soda, then hand wash with a laundry soap made for hand washing, and then hang or lay flat to dry.

    9. I put all clothes items in the freezer (in a ziploc) in the freezer; I think that gets rid of a lot.

  4. I thought I saw a young looking Jane Fonda last night but it was Miley Cyrus. I never thought they looked similar before. I may be the only one who loved the big hair.

    1. Oh I loved Miley’s whole look. I’ve really enjoyed her evolution and was really happy for her to have a big night.

    4. Her performance was giving me Tina Turner vibes, between the hair and the fringe and the leg pose.

        1. It’s a thing – Lea Michele is the poster child.

          I’m an Old, but I think they’re going to miss it as they age, but maybe they’ll just pump it back up with fillers.

      2. I feel like the fat is good as you age so you don’t look so haggard. Not gonna be a problem for me :)

    6. I came here to see if anyone had thoughts on it. I both:1) love it and 2) don’t want it to become popular because I’m lazy.

      1. I have naturally curly hair (2B-2C) that I usually blow dry more or less straight, but last night I slept on it wet (also lazy). So this morning it accidentally looked like Miley’s bird nest ‘do, but the messier version.

    7. Jane Fonda would never have ended an acceptance speech with “I may not be wearing underwear” (even in her Hanoi Jane/Barbarella days).

  5. Hi ladies, anyone have suggestions for reaching out to a former mentor after some years have passed? I’m a senior biglaw associate and had a really wonderful mentor at a prior firm. After lateraling, I lost touch but would like to reconnect to say how much I appreciated his mentorship as a junior associate etc. Not looking to return to my old firm or anything, but as I take on a mentor role with junior associates myself I have been reflecting on how foundational he was as I started my career. I know I’m probably overthinking this… Thanks all!

    1. Just email him and say what you said here. Most likely he’ll be delighted to hear from you. If he doesn’t really remember you or isn’t interested in reconnecting, he can just delete the email, no harm done.

    2. I agree you’re overthinking it. Send a letter or email that starts with something like “lately I’ve been thinking about how much I appreciate your mentorship when we worked together at XYZ.” Then give some stories/memories about specific things this person did. End with what you just say: “you were foundational as I started my career, and you helped me get to where I am today.” If you’ve had an opportunity to pass along and mentor someone behind you in a similar way, I think you include that also.
      If you’d like to reconnect with the person in person, then say that they can reach you at email or phone number if they’d like to get coffee or lunch.

    3. If you’re local, just email him and ask if he wants to get lunch to catch up. I am sure he would love to see where you are now. I get lunch every 6 months or so with a mentor from early in my career, but nowadays, it is more just a catch up between friends/colleagues. If you treat it like that, it won’t be weird!

    4. I had a similar block with what to say in an email. I tried ChatGDP and edited what it spit out. Made it that little bit easier. I used the free version.

  6. Pandemic-era clothes purchases that made sense then but are you all still wearing:
    Athleta pranayama cardigans
    Long sweater jackets from J Crew (maybe will use in spring when I don’t need a coat but it can get chilly?)
    Zuri shirts, formerly work with skinny jeans, hid COVID-15 but now seem like a lot of volume, too short to be a dress

      1. I love joggers in theory, but in practice they constantly ride up. I’m 5’8″, so not super tall (I’m the shortest in my family, actually). Is it just me? Any taller jogger brands to recommend?

        1. ugh this is my issue too! I’m only 5’6″, but with disproportionately long legs…. Gap Factory has tall sweatpants that are actually long, but they definitely look like sweatpants, not cute Vuori style joggers….

        2. My issue also and I’m 5-4. I. Theory they should work but I look like I’m in knickers half the time. Unsubscribe!

          1. me too. They do ok if I’m standing but if I sit down and the legs ride up, the cuffs ‘stick’ at the higher calf point and need tugging back down. Too annoying so I’m sticking with leggings.

          2. I agree with you and Cat! I’m about 5-6 and they ride up on me. Glad I’m not the only one! I have only one pair-got on a major sale (under $20) and they work around the house with the elastic bunchy cuffed leg. Otherwise I stick with slightly flared/looser leggings.

        3. Interesting! I’m 5’8″ and haven’t had issues with that, though I tend to go for joggers with a slightly tighter cuff. Have also had good luck with Athleta’s tall versions.

          1. +1. I’m not tall but I specifically buy these because I prefer the longer length and for my ankles to be fully covered during the winter months (live in SoCal so joggers work well in winter).

        5. I buy the Athleta Brooklyn Jogger style in tall.

          I’m 5’10” and the riding up thing drives me crazy. It doesn’t happen when I buy the tall size.

      1. Ditto this. I have only worn one pair of heels since spring 2020, a black pair of 1” kitten heels, and that’s maybe five times a year. I’m all about loafers, flats, and retraining my eye so I no longer thing “ugly” when I see a skirt or dress with a flatter shoe. (yes even a pencil skirt-suit and a round toe flat- when I see it now, my gut reaction is good for her instead of dowdy)

    3. All the sweater jackets! I can’t wear restrictive clothing anymore. Along those same lines, I let go of my underwire bras and never looked back.

        1. I’m pretty much only buying pants with at least a partial elastic waist. I tried on some nice jeans recently and could barely tolerate them.

          2. Yes – I’m all about the ponte pants. I need to be on the more dressed up side of business causal (but not business formal) and a sweater jacket with ponte pants is my go-to look.

          3. I’m wearing my Tapata pants from Amazon as I type this. Stretchy and comfortable!

    5. Agree with the comfortable shoes comment.

      For the first few weeks of the pandemic I was basically in loungewear but I was feeling depressed about it, so I decided I was actually going to get dressed every morning. I wore my work clothes for a year or so because I thought I needed to be presentable on zoom, but also because I wanted to continue to get use out of them.

      I’m over that now. Slowly I’ve replaced work separates with casual separates for WFH, which is permanent for me now, and have kept a few “work” outfits for meetings, conferences etc.

      Now everything is washable and dryable. I wear sneakers or sneaker soled flats pretty much daily. I don’t really plan to go back to the old way.

        2. in m0d, it’s the SAS Radiant, they look better on the foot than in the pic.

          When I google “sneaker soled flats” I see a pair of Cole Haans that I actually also have – the Malorie – and the Brianna by aetrex that I would probably order to try.

  7. Please help me decide what to buy/pack for a 4 day in person summit in Washington DC at the end of the month.
    I have been WFH for 7 years with a technology company (Jeans acceptable for company meetings/offsites), but now am supporting a federal agency and have forgotten what is considered acceptable in non-jeans friendly environments.
    I expect to be on my feet a lot during the summit with a lot of running around. I also run cold, but sweat through in stressful situations , and prefer natural fibers.

    I am 44, of Indian origin, and petite (5’2″, 120#)

    Can I do Boots + dress with cardigan + tights? or is it too 2006?
    What about black boot-cut cords with jewel colored cashmere sweater? What shoes would I wear for this combination?
    Thank you- I appreciate your help!
    What pants

    1. Speaking as a fed, I have a feeling that the federal employees will not be as spiffy or fashionable as you might fear…

      I don’t know your exact field and I myself am not super fashionable, but for something like this I’d probably wear nice pants with comfortable shoes (loafers, oxfords, even ankle boots that go up under the pants), a top you are comfortable in (I do not do bu—on up tops, being busty), and then I’d probably do a sweater blazer, like the J Crew ones (or in my case, J Crew Factory). I’d also do a simple dress with a sweater blazer or more structured cardigan. I would wear it with tights and knee high boots, but again, I’m not super fashionable and always struggled with shoes + tights.

      Check the weather carefully before you travel, by the end of February it could be any wear from 30s to close to 70 degrees.

      1. IME feds tend to dress formally but not fashionably. I would opt for a blazer instead of a sweater or cardigan.

        2. As a fed, I feel like we are very casual. No jeans, but pretty much anything else goes. And honestly, even some people wear jeans

    2. A boots/dress combo can be so many things – if you have a more modern choice for each that would be great. I don’t think you need a cardigan depending on the dress (also I think cardigans are outated but that might just me my personal preference – not a fan).

      The cords and jewel tone sweater sound dated to me. How about some wider leg pants from madewell or similar? wear with flats/loafers.

    3. DC here. Nobody’s wearing boots and tights. Cords are too casual for DC. I’d go for something like the J.Crew Kate pant (a straight leg business pant) tailored for chic flats. (Ann Mashburn flats – or their Talbots knock off – are popular in DC.) Pair with a sweater, swacket or blazer.

      1. I blame my lack of style on working in DC (and shopping at Lohman’s and Casual Corner (RIP!) b/c I was right out of school and had no $ and we were very “wear a suit and hose or suit-type separates” 5 days a week except for Fridays in the summer.

        1. Yes — it could be shiny polyester or a MOB brocade evening suite, but throw on some nude hose and Easy Spirit low heels and it was transformed into business attire. Or, like lawyers, it technically met the definition, so whatever. I wore a lot of what I now recognize was fancy / evening / occasion skirt suits because I didn’t know any better. And rocked the Loft suits from Potomac Mills even past the point of questionably ironing them on high to save on dry cleaning.

      2. Right?? I mean, unless you hang out at those clubs that charge $200 for a bottle of vodka, or hang out with the GWU students, NO ONE is high fashion here. I rather love it.

        Or maybe there are some high fashion people around, but dang if I’ve ever seen any!

        1. Do what now? This thread seems to have some extremes. Casual Corner went out out of business 20 years ago, and no, I shall never consider a 20 year old with a messy bun and debt up to her eyeballs fashionable. So I guess I’ll just be a stereotypical stodgy, middle aged DC denizen crushing on Jill Biden’s wardrobe.

      3. Just because one can get away with dressing terribly, doesn’t mean one should advise others to do so.

  8. I have a paycheck question I can’t seem to figure out. Last year I had 1 allowance on my W4. At the end of the year, I had a $20K raise kick in but my paycheck is actually smaller. My HR says that allowances are no longer a thing on the W4, that everyone was reset to 0 allowances with the implementation of the Tax Cut and Jobs Act, and that there’s nothing I can do to increase my net pay. I am married and my spouse is self-employed with highly irregular income, we pay his share of taxes as he earns it. I was counting on this raise to help smooth out our cash flow given spouse’s pay situation. Am I missing something or am I just out of luck here?

    1. Are you sure you are withholding as married and not “married but withhold at higher single rate”?

    2. You can still fill out a W4 but the way it works has changed. You probably have to fill out a new one. In any case, go back to HR and ask them to show you the W4 they have.

      Did you possibly check the “spouse also works” box somewhere along the line? My spouse is also self-employed and I realized (I think) that having that box checked and paying estimated taxes meant we were essentially withholding from his pay twice.

      1. Oh, interesting, thank you. I’ll have to play around with it. Currently I have filing status as married filing jointly, with 0 allowances and 0 other income. I guess that’s the only place to manage the amount that comes out.

    3. I don’t know about what your HR said, but I had a similar experience after a really significant raise this year. Our comptroller suggested that I talk to my CPA about how much to withhold and come back to her. So I had the impression there were levers I could pull, but that I should first determine whether I ought to pull them.

    4. I would fill out a new W-4. HR is right that there are no longer allowances, but there are other factors that impact your tax home.

      One other thing to consider – did you pass the social security tax cap last year? Social security tax wasn’t taken out of your paycheck on any earnings over $160k in 2023. I got a raise at the end of year, but my tax home for each paycheck in January was lower than those in December 2023 because social security tax is being withheld again and I increased my 401k withholding for the new max.

  9. For those who suffer from insomnia, do you ever use sick leave on days where you didn’t sleep much the night before?

    I just transitioned to a job with one PTO bank with 20 days total to the federal government where I get 13 sick days, 13 leave days and the sick days rollover with no cap. I never ever took sick days at my old job, so now I have the option I wonder if it’s okay to use them when dealing with insomnia. I will of course work with my supervisor, but wanted to get a temperature check before doing so.

    1. I would NOT tell your supervisor that you are taking a sick day for insomnia; I’d just tell her you are sick and are taking a sick day.

    2. I’ve done this. Or at least a half day. If its so bad that I can’t focus then I figure its close enough to sick to count.

    3. if i had sick days and don’t need a doc note i’d do it. no need to tell your supervisor the reason.. just im under the weather today

    5. Sick days are part of your total compensation, use them as you need. And not sleeping/dealing with chronic insomnia is perfectly acceptable.
      Also you don’t need to give a reason for using sick days beyond “I’m not feeling well.” Boss doesn’t need to know you’re catching up on sleep.

    6. I would have no reservations about using sick leave if I knew I wouldn’t be able to function that day due to lack of sleep. Does your employer ask for details when you take a sick day, or is “I’m not feeling well” enough?

      Like any chronic condition it will be an issue if it is very disruptive to everyone else – e.g. meetings frequently have to be rescheduled, you fall behind on your work, create more work for others, etc.

    7. If you can’t function because of symptoms of illness, isn’t that what sick days are for? If you have to ration your sick days vis a vis other illnesses, that’s for you to figure out. Remember this is a medical issue; your primary care should have ruled out underlying medical causes that can have insomnia as a symptom, and then referred you to a sleep neurologist if the conclusion was that it’s just a sleep disorder.

      Are you asking whether you should explain what you’re sick with? My feeling is that your supervisor doesn’t have a medical degree and doesn’t need details.

    8. I don’t have insomnia, but I still do this. If I didn’t sleep well or had a really late night and I know I don’t have anything pressing that day (and ideally no meetings that would have to be reacheduled), I’ll call out sick so that I can catch up on sleep. I’ve never had any boss ask why I was taking a sick day.

    9. Fellow insomniac here. I say to take the sick days. It’s better to get yourself rested and feeling 100% than to drag yourself through the day partly functional and to have your work product suffer all week.

      There was a study done showing that students who slept for four hours a night, for two weeks straight, had the same cognitive functioning as people who had pulled an all-nighter, and frighteningly, they weren’t aware of the cognitive decline.

    10. I don’t use leave after a sleepless night because I know I would then day sleep, aggravating and perpetuating my sleep issues. That’s completely unrelated to the question of whether it would be appropriate to use leave, of course.

    11. “I’m sick and didn’t sleep well, so I’m taking sick for the morning.”

      ” I will see if I feel better this afternoon & can log in and get some work done” (if applicable to your situation)

    12. In the federal government you can take up to 3 days without a doctor’s note. So I would just text or email your supervisor that morning with the message “I’m not feeling well and will be taking SL today.” No further explanation needed. And when you’re back, do a formal request in the system for your time sheet.

    13. Not government, but this would not be a concern in my office as long as you don’t abuse it (i.e., don’t always call in the Monday after a major sportsball weekend) or always take off days that have big meetings scheduled. That’s the whole point of sick leave, after all, that you can take the time you need without advance planning.

  10. Has anyone painted a large piece of wooden furniture? We got a big China cabinet off Craigslist many years ago, and it’s a very orange-y oak. The size is perfect, but it really does not go with our wood dining table, and since the room is on the darker side we want to brighten it/add a pop of color. Normally I am a big fan of natural wood, but it’s just too much in the room. Plus, this is probably not our forever table so I don’t want to stain to match and then end up getting a new table.

    Any tips, tricks, horror stories? Or paint recommendations? We’re thinking a slate blue, or maybe a green. Walls are beige, trim is white, floor is hardwood with a rug that will pull different colors based on the surroundings.

    1. Yes – you’ll need to thoroughly sand the piece which is a long dusty job. Oil-based paint will create a much more durable finish but stinks and needs time to ‘cure’ rather than dry, so best if you can isolate it in a room with open windows.

      2. Really dusty! Do it outdoors AND wear masks. That fine particulate will get deep in your lungs and sinuses.

      3. Agree with oil based paint. My husband repainted a cabinet I use in the bathroom for storage and a dressing table. He used latex based enamel so the top feels rubbery and is actually peeling in places. Oil based paint all the way.

    2. There are many youtubers who paint furniture. I would watch Christina Muscari for lots of good techniques and ideas. Have fun! Great idea!

    3. My MIL painted all the furniture in her vacation home with chalk paint and found it very easy. YMMV as to whether chalk paint coordinates with your decor.

    4. I love this idea! Had friends with a bright yellow painted China cabinet in their dining room and it looked amazing.

    5. I’ve never done either so I have no idea which is easier, but bleaching oak is kind of trendy right now, if you just want to brighten it up to a lighter color and don’t want an actual paint color, that’s an option.

    7. An orbital sander with 60-grit paper (and a spare KN95 face mask) make the sanding part so much easier. You will want to be outdoors for this, or isolate the room from your ventilation system.

      A paint sprayer makes the primer and paint application go super quickly, although you will also need a place to do this where fumes and overspray doesn’t cause issues. In the summer I do this outdoors in the grass (so I can mow the paint away) under a canopy (to keep birds & leaves from leaving stuff behind) and about 20 feet from anything permanent (so the spray doesn’t get blown onto the siding or our cars). In the winter I hang old sheets in the garage and plan for things to dry very slowly because of how cold it is.

  11. Favorite warm, reheatable breakfast recipes (that aren’t oatmeal)? I’ve been loving shakshusa lately but I’d like to mix it up. Kagiana is a favorite, too, but it’s not that great reheated. In the fall, I bake sweet potatoes and green apples with pumpkin pie spice and then sear some chicken apple sausage and top with a poached/over easy egg. But I ate that all fall and I needed a break. What is everyone making?

      1. +1 I used to do a frittata with sauteed spinach or kale + turkey breakfast sausage. I cut it into wedges and wrapped each in saran wrap. I learned exactly how many seconds it took in the microwave to reheat it. It was really an easy grab and go breakfast.

    2. Following with interest as your fall idea sounds delicious, and I love warm breakfasts in winter but also dislike oatmeal most of the time.

    4. Caveat, I’m a huge savory breakfast fan and I spent years in SE Asia and my two most common breakfasts were fried rice and bakmi which is basically lo mein, and they remain some of my favorites. So I eat pretty untraditional foods for breakfast.

      Fried Rice — I make a big batch, freeze it in individual containers, and microwave. Frittata reheats well if you are careful and don’t overheat. Both those are very flexible with ingredients.Back when I could eat gluten, chicken noodle soup makes a great breakfast in the winter!. Also I have an instant pot risotto recipe that I eat for breakfast sometimes — again, ingredients are up to you! Can also be batched and frozen.

    6. I know you said no oatmeal but… if you’ve only tried rolled or instant oats, consider trying steel cut oats. I make a pot one evening while cooking dinner and then reheat in the microwave and add different toppings based on my mood. The texture and flavor are completely different than rolled oats (which I dislike).

    7. Mmm, might need to go make some baked apples now.

      I just made some banana bread muffins, which are great heated up in the microwave. I store them in the freezer and defrost two as desired for breakfast. I have also made a breakfast casserole before (shredded potatoes, crumbled bacon, cheese, eggs, onions, peppers) that reheated nicely and was great with maple syrup. A Dutch baby/German pancake has a decent amount of protein in it from the eggs but isn’t super well balanced.

      I have also seen people on YouTube who make breakfast burritos or breakfast sandwiches and freeze them. You didn’t ask for freezer meal ideas, but these are all reheated in the microwave so they come out hot.

    8. You’ve taken breakfast at home to a level higher than I have ever conceived. But consider making breakfast burritos in bulk. I liked eggs and black beans and maybe sausage (it seems to hold up better than bacon) but you do you. Then you can wrap them up and reheat and add salsa or hot sauce. This really works best or maybe only in a microwave, so skip if like me you don’t have one.

    9. I make breakfast sandwiches ahead. English muffin, eggs with feta, avocado and a little hot sauce on top. I wrap it in a wet paper towel, freeze as a batch, and then reheat wrapped in the wet papertowel so the eggs/muffin don’t get dried out when microwaving.

    10. Cilbir is a good alternative to shakshuka. But neither fits the “reheatable” parameter.

    11. I use a silicone muffin mold to make egg cups! Scramble eggs and add in whatever veggies/cheese/meat you want, bake, and freeze. Super easy and quick to reheat. My favorite is a Greek version with feta, sun dried tomatoes, Kalamata olives, roasted red pepper and spinach.

    12. Waffles with peanut butter and bananas and Trader Joe’s everything sprinkle.
      Whenever we make weekend waffles, I make an extra batch to eat for breakfast during the week.

  12. Hi all! Long time no chat. Life got weird (again). Hope you’re all doing well.

    I’ve started a new job and I finally have the option for a dependent care FSA. Educate me on these? Pros and cons? Tax implications?

    1. Use it to the max that you can (cost of daycare up to the dependent care limit). It means day care is tax free.

    2. It’s a no brainer, do it. Family max of $5k (btw this hasnt increased since 1986 grrrrr). Iirc you have a new baby so you will have at least $5k of childcare expenses. You just have to remember to request reimbursement.

    3. It’s $5k of tax free money to use on childcare. There isn’t really a downside except it’s use it or lose it (e.g., if you have $5k withheld and then only spend $3k, the leftover $2k is just gone), so if there’s any question about how much money you’ll use, aim low. But pretty much any parent with a kid in daycare is going to hit the cap easily.

    4. They’re pre-tax. Use it or lose it. Limit is a maddening $5K annually (crazy low). When you’re claiming the reimbursement, you have to indicate the tax ID of the person/entity providing the services, so it won’t work if you’re paying someone cash who isn’t reporting income. Also doesn’t work for straight summer camps.

      My employer’s administrator is a nightmare with direct pay, but reimbursement is pretty easy. There’s an app where you upload dependent, receipts, and service dates. They ACH you the reimbursement within the day usually.

      I honestly just process the reimbursement requests quarterly and then feel like i got a “windfall” (of my own money) at spring break, summer vacay, fall break and christmas.

      1. Clarifying comment: it works for day summer camps as long as the provider has a tax ID number. It doesn’t work for sleepaway camps.

        I save all my documents and do it at the end of the year, and turn around and use the $5K reimbursement for summer camp registration in January/February.

  13. I’m late to the party on this, but want to get a Lululemon Belt Bag. Thoughts on the best size? The 1L or the 2L? Don’t want it to be too large, but want it to hold all the essentials.

    Also, are there knockoffs you would recommend or just stick with the Lululemon one?

    Thanks!

    1. I have the 1L. It fits phone + slimmed down wallet essentials + lip balm + mask + wipes. It does not fit glasses cases (regular and/or sunglasses) – and would not, even if I removed the mask/wipes.

      1. +1. I have put cheap sunglasses there in occasion because I’m not worried about those getting scratched, but would not put nice sunglasses since the case won’t fit. I put keys + cash + lip blam + couple of credit cards. FWIW I love mine and have two of them in different colorways. I also buy them as gifts and people seem to like them (all age ranges – from my nanny’s 11 year old daughter to my 70+ year old mom who uses it to hold her essentials on walks). I can’t speak to knockoffs but I’ve been pleased with the quality (note that I do not otherwise tend to buy any Lululemon products).

    2. I LOVE my Tory Burch belt bag. I initially bought for dog walking but it’s now my weekend and travel go-to. I highly recommend making sure the length works well over the shoulder as well as a belt (some were too short on my tall busy self). Also, see if there is some separation for storage. I typically carry sunglasses, a card case with all my credit cards, dog poop bags, compact and lipstick, car key fob. I like to keep the fob separate if I decide to throw my sunglasses in and have left the case in the car or if I’m carrying something important that I want to keep extra safe like my airline ticket.

    3. I have the 1L and it’s great for traveling – use as a belt bag/crossbody, stow in your carryon or tote to easily grab your essentials, etc. I have a smaller lululemon pouch (without the belt strap) that I use to contain my charger cords and adapters when traveling – also very useful.

      If you want to carry something the size of a paperback book, you’d definitely need the 2L.

    4. Bought one for my tween at Xmas. According to the staff at the store, the 1L is the most popular. It will fit a small wallet, phone and epipen. (My tween does not have a phone)

    5. The 1L barely holds my wallet, phone, and keys. The 2L is more versatile and will hold a sunglasses case.

    6. I gave away my 1L because I couldn’t fit everything in it (small wallet, sunglasses, keys). I have four 2Ls and they’re great! I’m 5’1” and they’re not too big. Costco started carrying identical knockoffs (Lole brand, available online), and I honestly would have purchased them if I didn’t already have those colors.

    8. for knockoffs I always heard good things about the Costco one from the brand Lole

    9. I have the knock off from Amazon and it works well for me. Material may not be as nice as the Lulu one and no logo, but it’s pretty inexpensive and looks pretty similar

  14. What do ya’ll do with an awkwardly long and narrow dining area? I have an open plan townhome with a galley kitchen and breakfast nook area that is about 4 ft x 9.5 ft. (there is an extra two -three feet next to this space that is the walkway area into the kitchen). What do you / can you fit in this space. Right now we awkwardly squeeze a four seater high top next to a playpen, but would like to dedicate it to eating space, but have never had enough room to comfortably fit four at that table. The whole space abuts a corner with ceiling height windows, so I can’t really attach anything to half the wall space, but ceilings are 10 ft, so fairly high.
    Is this a call for an interior space planning professional?

    1. What about a rectangular table, one long side against wall/window, two people on the other side and one person at each end? I can’t visualize what you’re describing super well though, so sorry if I missed something.

    3. A 36″ round table seats 4 and if you angle the chairs correctly, should fit. If there’s a usable corner, you can also make/build a corner booth and put the round table up against it.

      Also, if this is a breakfast nook, do you really need to seat 4? I have a 24″ round table and two chairs in my kitchen, and it’s perfect for 1-2 people to eat breakfast/snack or someone to just hang out at while another person is cooking. And it’s white marble so it looks like a little cafe :). We have a bigger table elsewhere, and we go there when we’re all sitting down to dinner. In practice, we never have more than two people eating breakfast at once on weekdays.

    4. I’d build in a banquette and put a small 36” round table by it with a couple of chairs. Cozy breakfast/casual dinner nook.

  15. Question – a dr that I’ve seen for 25 years since I was in college is retiring. Can I acknowledge the retirement? Get a card? A gift? Or is that weird?

    Backstory – age 75, cardiologist, at UPenn. Very reserved, unassuming type of person. Though since I’ve known him since my college days we do chat – about career, life, Penn. When he does chat, he’s a nice guy, sarcastic humor. From what I know about him – married, grown kids a few cities away, he and his wife downsized to an apartment recently and they love to travel, hike, boat. My understanding is he’s done patient care, will stay with the university for another year or two teaching, and then will fully retire. If I had to guess, once he’s not in the hospital or office daily, there will be a lot of international travel.

    I’m leaning towards a very brief card – like 2-3 sentences. I’m kind of an awkward person and am always super nervous at appointments so I feel like I may not be able to say much in person. Just want to wish him well on his next year at Penn and his eventual retirement while thanking him for all he’s done. While I don’t have any big story – I feel like he quietly has done a lot to keep my health steady which then allowed me to focus on law school, big law, moving cities, usual adult life. It was almost a constant as I built my life post college.

    I’m leaning away from gifting because honestly IDK what I’d get and keep thinking once you downsize, do you really want another random UPenn mug? Unfortunately the timing of this appointment isn’t such that I can be like hey I was vacationing in Greece last week, picked you up so baklava, happy retirement! He sees a much older patient population who I’m sure will joke with him about finally retiring and hand him wine or homemade cookies but IDK that feels awkward.

    My thought is write a card and bring it and hand it to him as I exit. If it somehow feels weird or he’s clearly not wanting to discuss retirement, just don’t pull out the card. Thoughts?

    1. I would write a card. I think that would be appreciated but wouldn’t be too much like a gift might be.

      2. Tend to agree. Everyone appreciates being appreciated and thanked – I know I do, as an unassuming person who is often overlooked because I’m not loud. But from MDs in my extended family, seems like they get weirded out by gifts. Often they’re thinking oh no why did this patient spend 50 bucks on me, they could’ve used that money for their next copay. I know it isn’t a money issue as OP is in biglaw but often the dr recipients still think that way. I know in my family, they’re almost relieved when it’s food gifts because they just share it with the staff and it’s done.

        But given that OP is understandably nervous for a cardiology appointment, doesn’t want to be carrying in a tray of cookies or whatever – which at a place like Penn would have to be large as even the outpatient offices have a lot of staff – yes go with the card.

    2. When my beloved, long-time MD retired, I sent flowers and a card like what you describe.

    3. my father is (almost) 75, a physician and a Penn alum (as am I), though doesn’t work at the university. a card is so incredibly thoughtful. you also don’t necessarily have to give it to him as you exit if that feels uncomfortable for you. you can leave it with the front desk staff or mail it. My father is also the type of doctor that people see regularly for years on end and he has had patients give him everything from homemade wood working items, to a framed picture of something with our family last name that they saw when on vacation, to cookies, to simply an email. when i had my twins he had a patient knit two baby blankets. (i do not have any doctor that i can possibly imagine doing anything like this for). while i’m sure he already has these, if he likes travel, you can never have too many luggage tags (or at least that’s what i think), or you can make a donation to the cardiology department in his name, but even simply a card writing exactly what you wrote here “thanking him for all he has done to keep your health steady, which allowed you to focus on law school, big law, moving cities, adult life, etc.” and wishing him well as he enjoys this next chapter of life. you are a very thoughtful patient!

      1. Agree with this. As another Penn alum – OP if he’s staying with Penn for a year or two, he’s maintaining an academic office. While I wish you a very easy appointment, if you end up being nervous about your actual appointment and test results and are too busy asking those questions to get into thanking him or handing him a card – don’t worry about it. You can mail it to him later. You can call the cardiology department and ask for his academic office mailing address – thats where he’s receiving cardiology books he wrote chapters in that he wants to keep in hard copy or stuff that his former fellows want to send him, so he can receive a card there too, which his assistant will gladly hold for him until he returns from his vacations.

        But I agree with the PP – your sentiment is very thoughtful and will be appreciated whether you hand him a card that day or mail it three months later.

    4. I think a card would be perfect and much appreciated. I also think your leaning away from a gift is correct.

    5. I told my rheumatologist in person at our last visit before he retired. I told him that I appreciated that he listened to me and took me seriously, which hadn’t been the case with other doctors, and that I would miss him very much. He seemed really happy to hear what I said.

      1. Not a doctor story but this reminds me of a partner I worked with when I was in biglaw. In a different department than me, demanding but in a very kind, respectful, teaching way. But people didn’t like him because he was demanding and in a firm of loud flashy business generating partners, he was just the quiet unassuming guy toiling away. He was leaving the firm to start a business, I happened to be on a different trial team then working 24-7. I had no time to get a card or anything so I simply stopped by his office at 8 am on his last day – as I couldn’t guarantee when I’d get back from court – and simply thanked him for all he had done for me. And like your rheumatologist he was so touched that I stopped by and years after the fact it’s gotten back to me that he has said to people that I’m so thoughtful etc for that one simple act of saying thank you.

        So yes OP I think your instinct is right. People like to be appreciated, even the people who are quietly helping our lives by toiling away without being flashy about it.

    6. I’ve been a physician for nearly 20 years, and I’ve kept every single card that my patients have sent me. I love to reread them when I’m feeling burned out. Those connections with patients are what make my work feel meaningful and help me get through difficult days. Definitely no need for a gift.

    7. The doctors in my family don’t need or want gifts but they genuinely appreciate and keep the thank you cards sent by patients.

    8. My husband is a doctor and he really appreciates cards from patients. Probably 2-3x a month a patient brings/sends a physical gift. He often can’t accept them under hospital policy depending on the value/type of gift (a surprising number of patients bring him alcohol!) and he feels bad that he has to decline them because he knows the patient is trying to do something kind. If you feel strongly, he likes candy as a gift because he can share it with the nurses/larger team he works with who are amazing and less likely to get a thank you gift.

    9. I can almost guarantee he’d love a card (we all do). You can drop it off at the front desk if it feels weird to hand it to him in person, but really don’t feel weird about it!

  16. Anyone watching the newest season of true detective? I am so confused after this weekend’s episode. There are only a couple left in the season, and it feels so much less clear than previous seasons.

    1. I’m only halfway through the latest episode so can’t really answer your question. But wanted to chime in to say that I am loving this season. I was not a huge fan of prior seasons and didn’t even get through the second one. I love the female leads and the supernatural elements. It’s legit scary too.

    2. I was confused, too. The NY Times does recaps, also Vulture dot com (NY Magazine) does recaps. I find that helps when I’m hopelessly lost. I feel like the season started out strong but is startling to lose its way. But I still love Jodie Foster’s performance.

    4. Last night’s episode was completely disturbing. Also feeling lost but maybe that’s the point?

  17. Has anyone seen anything like this: I’m looking for a bullet journal but one that opens like a Steno pad instead, along the top. I’d like dotted paper if possible and a more substantial feel to the cover if possible… Or a bullet journal that lays flat? Don’t need calendars or anything just blank papers. Thanks!

    1. Rhodia #16 Wirebound Notepad for something that opens at the top. But i find the LEUCHTTURM1917 lays pretty flat when note taking.

    2. +1 for Leuchtturm 1917. I use it for bullet journalling and it lays almost flat. Nice paper quality and the ink doesn’t bleed through. Loads of colours to choose from too. Would recommend!

  18. I’m not a litigator, but about a decade ago, I had an opportunity to make a small contribution to a brief in a case before a federal appeals court across the country. I went through a minor process to get admitted (paperwork, a law school classmate who was already a member vouched for me). This court requires some paperwork and a fee (small, but out of pocket for me since I’m now self-employed) every five years to maintain admission.

    Is there a downside I’m not seeing to resigning from this bar? I don’t anticipate ever having an opportunity to contribute to a brief before it again.

    3. No, not at all. Particularly since it doesn’t sound like admission was particularly difficult to get, so you can always get it again if you need to. I might feel differently if you were talking about admission into a state bar that requires an exam/C&F review/multiple references.

  19. Meeting an elderly relative for a coffee near the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Any recommendations for a bakery/coffeeshop that is walking distance from the Met, quiet, and has seating? TIA!!!

    1. There’s a great coffee shop / cafe at the Neue Galerie, which is super close by and itself a wonderful (tiny) museum.

  20. Do we wear scarves (fashion scarves vs winter scarves for warmth) in 2024? I’m giving the side eye to 75% of my closet.

    1. I am not wearing scarves except with coats. I am holding onto most of my scarves, though, because they are beautiful, many have sentimental associations, and they take minimal space to store.

      1. +1. Most things come back around and I think scarves are less likely to look dated than other pieces. Maybe not a skull or owl print scarf (hello 2009) but most should be fine.

    2. I don’t know about the royal “we” but I wear scarves and love them as a third piece. I have a collection of Hermes ones you can take out of my cold dead hands. I’m also seeing them a lot in my office lately so I’d say they’re coming back. I have a strong sense of personal style so I’d wear mine regardless though.

    3. So, at my office, my fashionable manager (mid-40’s) wears big blanket scarves as a third piece. My mid-60’s coworker wears silk scarves. Guess who looks more polished?

      I’m keeping my silk scarves, but not wearing them to office currently. I do have an office scarf (lightweight merino) that I keep for warmth while sitting at my desk.

    5. I’m holding on to them because they will come back around… but in the meantime for Xmas last year I “wrapped” a lot of my gifts in scarves. It was really easy, and I thought it was beautiful. Got some side-eye from my fuddy-dud parents though.

  21. Jumping off the earlier discussion about fixing new varieties of foods, do you all have suggestions about good containers to use to go from freezer to oven or microwave that are not plastic? I’m trying to do more cooking then freezing half for a meal later and want to move away from plastic. Not sure if I should go buy some small Pyrex-type dishes and be done or something else. Any great brands I should look at instead?

    2. I adore my Pyrex. Made the switch from plastic ~10 years ago and the original set is still going strong. Note that the plastic lids do sometimes crack when taking them off after they’ve been in the freezer. I may just be particularly rough with mine though.

      1. Yes, I use the Pyrex storage containers and buy new lids from time to time.

        If I were going to use the freezer with them a lot, I’d probably go with rectangular rather than the round ones I have a lot of. But I have absolutely frozen a lasagna in my deep rectangular one and have put it straight into the oven.

        I did the freezer meals from A Pinch of Yum and froze them in my round pyrexes, a little dip of the outsides in warm water and the frozen chunk of food comes right out. The recipes I am thinking of went straight from frozen to the instant pot (things like stews.)

    4. I have vintage pyrex with glass lids.
      I’ve heard new pyrex is good, but the new ones have plastic lids.

      1. Thanks for the replies! I will be looking into the options near me. Appreciate the tip about rectangle v. round.

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