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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
This dress from Maggy London is a great one-and-done piece for office dressing this summer. The elastic waist gives it a great shape without having to fuss with adding a belt. I would wear this on its own for a more casual office, or add a navy blazer for a more formal look.
The dress is $128 at Nordstrom and comes in sizes 14W–24W.
This Karen Kane dress is an option in straight sizes; it's available in navy and black for $108 at Nordstrom; meanwhile at Nordstrom Rack there are a ton of blue Maggy London dresses in straight sizes.
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Sales of note for 9.10.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Save up to 40% on new markdowns
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- White House Black Market – 30% off new arrivals
Sales of note for 9.10.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Save up to 40% on new markdowns
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- White House Black Market – 30% off new arrivals
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Anon
We don’t get enough vacation time in the US. And by that, I mean true ‘nobody called me and I was able to not check my emails for the days I was out’ vacation, as well as actual time.
After a great 4 day weekend, I’m currently sitting here, looking at my work login screen and just… I’m so scared of what my inbox is going to be like. This is what happens when you make your staff so ‘lean’ that there’s nobody to cover.
Anon
Totally. The only thing that helps is taking time off during time periods when a lot of people are — around July 4, week before Labor Day, and Christmas to New Years. So many people are out that everything is slower and the emails aren’t quite as numerous.
anon
Yes and no, though. I think the general mentality around PTO here is garbage, but I am in the US and I don’t check emails on vacation nor do I take phone calls. I am in-house counsel and support a global function that is indeed critical to the business. However, I am not that special (I am not saving lives and nothing I do can’t be handled by someone else while I am gone or wait until I get back), so I just don’t work on vacation. If that’s an expectation, my employers will forever be very disappointed.
Anon
This. Also to the point above, there are hacks. Go when everyone else is a great one, I also always fake my return – I take a day to catch up and tell the org I’m “out” (in my OOO not my compensation, I don’t appear on Skype or online, I just stealthily get through my email and set any replys to go out the next day).
Tea/Coffee
OMG I need to start doing this. Great idea.
Vicky Austin
that’s a brilliant idea. You could do this as a half day as well. Stealing.
Anonymous
This is great. Seriously what is the deal with people who think it’s ok to inundate me with manufactured emergencies the day I get back?
Anon
I do this the day before I leave too. My out of office is always on a day early.
Ana
I definitely think people are more scared to not check their email/phone than they should be. Setting boundaries is the same in the workplace as anywhere else. And if you say you won’t be on your email, but then are, people will start to expect that. If you don’t, they’ll just work around it, thats what you do for a number of situations at work anyways.
Anon
Is this my husband responding? He insists that my life is like this because I allow my job to do this to me. That if I just am strict that I don’t check email or phone after hours, they won’t fire me. I think he doesn’t realize that… just because I ignore the work for a few days, it doesn’t go away. It just makes it so much harder when I come back.
But also: can we talk for a minute about how some organizations are so leanly staffed these days that there is nobody who can cover for me on topics? I literally worked on my travel day to put together a full briefing so somebody could cover a meeting in my absence… and then the person who was supposed to be covering got on the line and suggested they reschedule it for when I was in the office the first question they asked. (Note: this was a basic question which… had colleague read the email I sent, would have seen the answer right away.)
anon
I’m anon at 8:53. I am an SME for the entire company in a particular area, but staffing issues are not my job to figure out. My position is that if there is something that truly only I can answer (from an internal staffing perpendicular) and I am unavailable, that is not mt people to fix. My boss can go to outside counsel if necessary. If the powers that be have decided this is how they are staffing my group, they will have to face the consequences.
I have yet to be remotely in danger of being fired and instead keep being promoted so my boundary setting doesn’t appear to be the end of the world where I work.
anon
Good lord, the typos. Sorry about that!
Perpendicular = perspective
Mt people = my problem
Anonymous
Anon at 11:54, I agree with you wholeheartedly. I never, ever check email in the evenings or on vacation and I just got complimented at my company for being “super responsive” to our top client and “always getting her what she needs right away.” The trick is to respond to emails quickly during business hours and then people don’t even notice if you don’t log on later. It’s all about the impression you make and then the rest of the company’s issues are not my problem.
Anonymous
+1. I do not answer emails on vacation. They can send them, but I will not look at them. The world has not fallen down. My OOO provides no instructions for getting in touch with me.
That being said, we need way more vacation time in the US.
Anon
I’m not saving lives but I’m supporting those who do (“second responder”). I never ever check email/phone on vacation. In order to handle my stupidly stressful job I need time off to unplug.
The US should give more PTO overall, but we all should pushback against answering on vacation
Anon
You should have a little empathy. Not everyone has the same job as you.
anon
100% agree. I was out last week and forced myself to not check my email. Good in the moment, but catch-up has negated any benefits of being away.
Anonymous
I don’t really understand this. Yes, email catchup is certainly annoying, but how did it “negate any benefits of being away?” That sounds disproportionate or like an overly negative take. I look back so fondly on my last trip of 2019 before the pandemic and I can hardly even recall any irritation at the 500+ emails I vaguely remember had to deal with when I got back…
anon
Not the anon above, but my anxiety about what might be in my inbox outweighs the benefits of not checking it. I was away for three weeks this summer and checked in every other day. I only dealt with things that were actively on fire (one phone call and a handful of emails), but knowing what was coming kept me from anxiety-spiralling about what might be in my inbox when I got back.
Anonymous
YMMV, but in that scenario, I would treat the anxiety, not work on vacation. What will REALLY happen if you don’t attend that phone call or send that handful of emails? Will someone else step in to do it?
Anon
Because a week off just means doing two weeks worth of work the following week. It piles up, and it still needs doing. Taking off only to come back and work twice as hard isn’t a net gain.
anon
Yes, exactly. Not sure how this is hard to understand. I worked my tail off just to leave, then I’m working my tail off to catch up. It truly sucks.
Anon
Exactly. This doesn’t happen to me, but to my spouse. She’ll take off 40 hours of vacation one week, then the next week she works 70-80 hours (including on the weekend) because all the work of last week still needs to get done (and urgently, due to the nature of her job). It has occurred to me before “then why does she even have to put in the vacation hours in the first place?” Over the two weeks, she’s still working full time.
Anonymous
Someone once told me that two weeks is the ideal amount of time to take a vacation, because if it’s one week people will just wait for you to get back and deal with things, but if it’s two weeks, they’ll find someone else to do it. Not sure how realistic it is to actually take two weeks, but I think he was right in theory.
Coach Laura
Same here. I have my own portfolio and the work doesn’t do itself when I’m gone. I have to work an extra 20 hours before I leave for a week and another extra 20 when I get back. But the real reason that I answer emails on vacation – besides the fact that no one else can get up to speed that quickly – is that I’ve learned from hard experience that a quick email is better than letting something fester and get worse so when I get back I have a uncontrolled forest fire instead of a dumpster fire. Averting disaster is the goal.
Anonymous
Honestly, the only way I’ve found to get a real pre-pandemic vacation is go somewhere international (preferably in an Asian timezone so you’re literally day & night from the US team) with terrible internet access.
anon
Why? Can’t you just not take your work phone? You’re doing this to yourself.
Anonymous
Nope – work and personal phones are combined at my firm. I don’t work in law or finance.
Anonymous
I would flat-out refuse to BYO phone. If my employer wants to be able to contact me, they can provide the phone.
Anonymous
+1. I’m truly sympathetic to the workaholic culture here and I know full well how much effort it can take to push back, but I also know that a lot of the times I’ve felt stressed or like there are no boundaries, it’s totally self-inflicted. It’s worth some self-examination.
Anon
In that case, disable notifications for work emails, slack, etc and only answer calls you’re sure are not from work.
For the record- this is one of my the reasons why I hate the concept of having both on one cell. Im in government so I’ve always had a separate work cell and it rocks.
Coin
I went to CA a while ago and told my clients I was in Yosemite the whole time for this exact reason. I did go to Yosemite, but wasn’t there the whole time
Anon
Ever since a trip to Yosemite, I have really appreciated the “no service” excuse.
Anonymous
I had wifi access while on safari in South Africa. This was 5 years ago. I do not camp, so I assume I will be staying in a place with internet access. I check my email on vacation but typically my assistant will forward most matters to someone else during my vacation.
anon
I’m not allowed to take my work devices out of the country so my international vacations are excellent :) My entire family lives in Europe so I’m there a lot — I think these trips have helped establish the expectation that I’m not available when on leave, even if I’m staying within the US.
Anonymous
The work culture in the US of ‘instant response’ is very strange and uncommon globally. As someone who often works with people in other countries, sometimes a response takes a few weeks or even a month *gasp*, and it’s fine. Even really high profile international things are often late, it’s really NBD. I don’t understand why US companies act like a work is so important and staff internalize that, because it legitimately doesn’t matter.
Anon
I honestly wish I could internalize the message of “in the grand scheme of things, work is just work” For me, this is true – I’m not saving lives or anything remotely close. Still, I totally sweat the small stuff.
Anonymous
I go back and forth on this. Yes I agree people should be able to take real vacations without being bothered with stuff that someone else could do. But also, I’m a partner in a large law firm and my clients are paying $$$ for availability. If I don’t want to have to check email once or twice a day so I can respond to a client or forward something that opposing counsel sent only to me, then I should find a different career. I think I was more salty about the lack of a true vacation when I was an associate and I was truly replaceable. I don’t support requiring people to work on vacation for no reason, but I also recognize that being in a position of responsibility means you can never turn off 100%.
Anon in Dallas
I’m just a mid-level associate in BigLaw and I know I’m replaceable but I still feel like I’m being paid a lot of money for my availability, at least to a point. During the summer, one of our summers asked me if I was going to answer emails and work on my vacation (the implication being that it was an awful thing to have to do) and I didn’t want to scare them away but at the same time I was very honest. I told them that, yes, in BigLaw you can get completely work-free vacations but it won’t be every vacation and part of getting the salary is putting the client before yourself, at least sometimes. If that vacation had been a Big Deal then I could have gotten myself pulled off of deals, but instead I worked one whole morning and checked and responded to email at least a couple times a day while I was gone.
Of Counsel
Seconded. Yes – I could not check my email during vacation. The world would not end and nobody would be dead. I could also come back to find that my clients have replaced me (with someone in my firm or otherwise) because they needed a conflict check and a responsive pleading filed NOW and not a week from now. Or that something was not handled the way I wanted because my office (which is great) cannot read my mind.
Pre-pandemic I went to Europe for 10 days and checked my email every day. It took less than a hour a day to delete the junk, forward what someone else could handle, and respond to the very few things that needed my personal attention immediately. I only had one call and it was genuinely an emergency that nobody else in my office could handle. And that was way less stressful than it would have been to come back to a few hundred unread messages, at least one very angry client, and a half-dozen issues that needed to be fixed.
I will say, I used to be so anxious to be “available” that I was constantly checking my phone but a comment from my kid made me realize how unavailable that made me to my family any how much it was preventing me from relaxing and enjoying my time off. So I made a personal rule that I only check my email once during the day. I set aside time to respond/forward non-emergency emails early in the morning and late in the evening and otherwise did not look at my phone (except for directions!)
Anon
I’m starting to feel like I did at the beginning of covid- stuck at home, angry at the people who won’t wear masks (though now at those who won’t get vaccinated). will this ever end? (for context I live in a city where cases are surging, pediatric and adult ICUs are overflowing). It was nice those few months when we were vaccinated and could worry a bit less. The analogy that this is the worst group project ever is spot on
Anon
Yes same. I’m vaccinated but have an unvaccinated kid and I feel like it’s early March 2020 here in NYC. Everything is open but half the people are hiding out at home and half are acting like nothing is the matter. I cannot believe that we’re still in this mess a year and a half later.
Anonymous
It’s nothing like March 2020
Anonymous
Yeah, I’m a New Yorker and feel this is over the top. Ambulances are not blaring constantly. Deaths remain low here. There are good treatments now and at least many older people are vaccinated. School is expected to open and I’m cautiously optimistic that the arts won’t have to shut down again too. I wish people would be more cautious but we’re not back to March 2020.
Cornellian
I think a lot of areas o the country (like Texas) are very close to where NYC was in March of 2020. Clearly through their own doing, but nonetheless.
Anonymous
Our school board has just voted to make masks optional regardless of vaccination status, in defiance of state law that requires adherence to CDC guidelines. I just told my husband we need to sell our house and move.
Anon
And our school board voted to require masks in defiance of our governor’s order. Crazy everywhere.
Anon
I get it, I’m angry too, but I’m also really focused on how effective he vaccines actually are and am living my life now in a way I couldn’t a year ago. Things are open, I have travel plans on the books, my masking is essentially theater since I’m vaccinated (there really isn’t great reason to be concerned but I play along and I don’t stress about the type of mask I’m wearing and it’s effectiveness anymore. It really is a lot better when I step back and think about it. I don’t have kids under 12 at home so that makes a huge difference. Don’t get me wrong, I’m furious with the idiots who aren’t getting vaccinated but I’m trying not to focus on that.
Anonymous
Masking is not just theater, even for the vaccinated. Since unvaccinated people need to be masked and there’s no reliable way to distinguish the vaccinated from the unvaccinated or enforce a masking requirement only for unvaccinated people, everyone must be required to wear a mask.
Anon
I can wear it, follow the guidance, and still think it’s theater.
Anonymous
You can think whatever you want, but there is actually a good reason for you to wear it.
Anon
how is it theater if vaccinated people can get and spread the virus?
Cat
because for vaccinated people, catching Covid is basically catching a cold. You know we are never eradicating Covid, right, just turning it into a regular old manageable risk of life?
I am no longer worried about my personal safety, only that testing positive will interfere with my travel plans.
Anonymous
TBH, I look at what health care people are doing, esp. people dealing with open mouths (dentists, etc.). At first, it was like they were in Breaking Bad. Then, back to cloth over N-95s. [Regular health care people were in blue exam masks, with masked patients, often making patients wear exam masks.] Now, I bet it may be changing back to add a helmet or something as another layer (you can have exposure to many nasty germs via your eyes). I figure, they have skin in the game, co-workers sidelined due to being sick or quarantining, so I just see what they do vs what anyone says.
Of course, my idiot medical BIL is now finally getting his shots b/c his employer is requiring it and needing proof (one good thing of EMRs). His idiot wife is still not vaxxed even though she is pregnant and works with pregnant patients and newborns, and even though our area has had a rash of premie births b/c the moms got COVID and maternal / fetal deaths from it.
Anonymous
You are free to be wrong as long as you act properly.
Anon
Because you actually have to have Covid, and vaccinated people are far less likely to. The odds are actually quite low and the reason we returned to masking is because there was no way to police the unvaccinated who stopped wearing masks when they shouldn’t have. And if you’re vaccinated, manage to get a breakthrough infection and develop enough to pass it on, if the person who gets it from you is vaccinated, they aren’t getting much more than a cold. I get that there are immunocompromised people, and I mask, but I also recognize that for someone vaccinated it is largely theater. The CDC needs to sell the concern so that the unvaccinated are forced to do something.
Anone
I am in FL (unfortunately for this). I know or know of 7 people who have contracted COVID within the last 3 weeks. All of them were vaccinated.
Anone
And I want to add that of the 7 people I know, or know if, that got COVID, I only spoke directly to 2 of them. Neither of them has their sense of smell back and they both said they can only taste a little bit. One of them got sick over a month ago, and the other one got sick 2.5 weeks ago. Both were very ill, not hospitalized, but missed a week of work and were miserable.
Anonymous
“For vaccinated people, catching COVID is basically catching a cold.” A cold that could cause lifelong disability. Yeah, no thanks.
Pretty Primadonna
Even if Covid is not going away, masking right now is prudent, even for the inoculated. I am one who had a breakthrough case. Although it was “basically a cold” (rolls eyes) it was still very much disruptive to my life (quarantining, cleaning more, etc.) and I would be thrilled to have NOT contracted it.
Anon
IDK? Enter the thought police, here to judiciate inside our heads.
Anon
I am appalled at your attitude. Honestly. You are not the only person on earth.
Room for Nuance
Cloth masks likely aren’t effective against delta (see Michael Osterholm, who has bipartisan bona fides (really nonpartisan bona fides). Agree that the vaccines were about making risk manageable. But the tipping point for me is that we don’t have data on delta and long-term effects on kiddos under 12. I try not to freak myself about that. Masks in schools, fine, I guess. Masks if I’m running in for a mobile sandwich order? Nope. (Masks are recommended in some places and required in other places where I live).
I also would be curious about real-world cloth mask studies w/ regard to COVID spread. I don’t think there is a definitive real-world study. Add that to the fact that places w/ lockdowns and mask mandates have had awful COVID spread. So, I think there is nuance here but people get rabid about this stuff.
Anonymous
@Room for Nuance
There is real world data on alpha spread before and after mask mandates. Look particularly at the figure at the top of the 3rd page.
https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/70/wr/pdfs/mm7010e3-H.pdf
Frankly, I don’t find this data very strong. The entire effect from masking depends on one data point (the first) and if you eliminate it there is no sudden change when mask mandates are instituted. I suspect that masking helps slightly but it’s nothing like distancing or vaccination.
anon
I am outside New Orleans, and one of my coworkers, who is vaccinated, ended up in the ER with Covid. He’s back at work now and looks like he’s been through hell. He is in his late 30s and in very good shape, with no apparent underlying conditions. The head of the Emergency Department says 95% of the people in the hospital are unvaccinated, so yes, the vaccine is working. But it seems that the delta variant is making younger (30s and 40s), vaccinated people sicker to a greater extent than previous variants. Children under 12 seem to be getting sicker as well. I haven’t been nervous about Covid since being fully vaccinated and have happily eaten indoors at restaurants and taken off my mask at local grocery stores. I’m worried again for the first time since getting vaccinated, and probably more worried for my own safety and my kid’s than at any point since March 2020.
Anonymous
I think that Delta is not like last summer’s COVID at all. Last summer I was not really worried and was living mostly outside socially. I have an 11YO and am super angry right now that he can’t get shots until maybe winter break. I really am not sure how school will go. School personnel may be 50% vaxxed and even with masks, this will potentially be a very rocky September. Many outside nature-type camps have shut down this summer with outbreaks (among kids, among staff that has to quarantine and then they can’t meet staffing ratios), and in my average-compliance area that didn’t happen last summer.
anon@10:13
To be clear, I am wearing my mask again, and so is the rest of my family–our governor issued a mask mandate last week, but we’d gone back to masking about a week or two before that. We are also limiting ourselves to what we consider essential outings–work, school, doctor’s appointments, picking up prescriptions. We will likely go back to wearing masks indoors or only being outdoors with grandparents, extended family, and close friends who are vaccinated, at least for a month or two while Covid is so bad in our area.
Anonymous
Just want to address the happen to “develop enough to pass it on” comment above— you can be just as infectious as someone unvaccinated if you develop a mild case or case without symptoms. Viral load is still high. This goes against early assumptions and is worth noting. That is why masking isn’t just theater.
Anonymous
Yeah, you got your vaccine so who cares about all those kids and vulnerable people.
Anon
That’s nasty. I got my vaccine and I’m not living in mortal fear anymore. It doesn’t mean I’m unconcerned about kids or vulnerable people. What pray tell do you think I should be doing? Staying home forever? Freaking out?
Anonymous
Wearing. A. Mask. And not going around undermining masking by whining that it is “theater.”
Anonymous
Exactly. You may think you’re doing enough simply by wearing it, but if you’re propagating the message that it’s “theater” to family, friends, and others in your life, you’re harming the cause and giving others an out on mask-wearing. Yes, it sucks that we have to bend over backwards for everyone else – trust me, I get it. But let’s still try to get this stupid pandemic under control for the love of all that is holy.
Anon
I said quite clearly I do wear a mask. I just do not have to think the way you do. It is theater. Tell me, do you go into a restaurant with it on, and then take it off to eat are you really doing anything more than virtue signaling? Or probably not because you’re probably not going anywhere.
anon@10:13
I agree that masking in a restaurant is theater. I’m not dining indoors anymore because it’s not safe (here in Louisiana) even with vaccines and masks, especially with an unvaccinated child at home. I started dining indoors the day I was fully vaccinated, at the beginning of April, and did so happily until mid-July.
Masking at school, at work, in the elevator, at the grocery store, at the pharmacy, at the doctor’s office, at the hair salon, with friends and family–not theater.
Anon
It also matters where you are. I get the vitriol coming from those of you in places with low vaccine uptake and high counts. I’m in an area where nearly 80% of the population is vaccinated and there are very low case counts, no hospital issues etc. So it does take on more of a theater feeling here than perhaps in red states.
Anonymous
No, I’m not dining in restaurants right now because we are about to top the January peak of infections and I’m not that dumb and stubborn.
Anonymous
I don’t really care any more about adults who could have gotten it and just didn’t bother to. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
I do care about kids who are too young and kids with idiot parents (my nieces and nephews) who won’t let them get vaccinated. And I know there are some adults with unique vulnerabilities even if they have gotten the shots. I also care about my unvaccinated inlaws currently on vacation on a U.S.-possession/territory island somewhere where they are likely to get it or spread it and for anyone on the plane (I am sure they will be eating/drinking the whole time to warrant their masklessness) with them.
anon
You don’t say how old your nieces and nephews are, but in many states, the age to consent to medical treatment without needing parental consent is around 13-14.
Anonymous
But kids can’t drive until 16 or 17, so they really can’t jump through the hoops to get the shots on their own in many areas outside of big cities. Plus, they have to go twice, many doctor office send robo calls to the # on file, and the kid often doesn’t want to defy parents. With EMRs, parents can easily see what a kid does (I can see it for my kids on my phone and get notified when something gets updated or there is a message / bill). I get it’s possible, but I don’t feel that it is likely.
Anon
well I do have kids under 12 at home, two of them. i have been to the pediatrician twice in the past week with them. they have told me that they have seen SO many breakthrough cases in parents. they are not sure if it is the kids giving it to the parents or the parents giving it to the kids. the numbers where I live are as bad as they were at the peak in 2020. Vaccinated people can get (yes you are very unlikely to get super sick and die – vaccines work!) and spread covid. So you could be asymptomatic and be going around harming others if you weren’t wearing a mask. I truly appreciate you wearing a mask, but it definitely isn’t theater since you could give covid to my unvaccinated child or one of the millions of people for whom the vaccines are not effective.
Anonymous
It’s not theater. Breakthrough infections are occurring and while hospitalizations are rare it doesn’t seem like infection is. Six vaccinated friends went out on Saturday—all now have symptoms and 3 tested positive. Knowing that you can be just as infectious with a mild or asymptomatic case means no mask makes you a direct threat to kids and the immune compromised.
Anon
yup and as a parent who lives in an area where the pediatric ICU is full with kids… I ran into an acquaintance who is a doctor at the children’s hospital and she told me the number of healthy kids she is seeing with covid – she told me that she is now much more concerned about the health and safety of her kids than when the virus began
Anonymous
Yep, it’s absolutely not theater. Between breakthrough infections, the behavioral science of universal masking, and protecting all of us from more variants, they are NOT THEATER.
Anon
It’s also now been confirmed that mild breakthrough cases can lead to long COVID. My odds of long COVID were always way, way higher than my odds of hospitalization or severe infection. So I’m not sure how to think about my risk now.
Anon
I know 2 people with long covid and it’s really terrible. Just the fatigue alone would be impossible for me as a single parent with a demanding job. I would have to go on leave/disability and hope I recover enough to be able to work again before money runs out. Both people I know with long covid haven’t been able to work in 6+ months, but thankfully have working partners with insurance.
Anon
My sister has it, and it’s been rough. I know I might end up with it anyway the way things are going. But I am not going to end up laid up with long COVID because I just had to eat out during the Delta surge either.
Anonymous
DH and I are vaccinated. Our entire eligible (>12) extended family is vaccinated. My town has a vaccination rate of 95% for adults and 88% for kids 12-18. I personally know three of the unvaccinated people and they cannot be vaccinated and are extremely COVID cautious (as in, still getting meal deliveries, sending kids to remote private school).
I follow the rules, but don’t wear a mask unless it is the rule where I am. I got COVID two weeks ago. From where, who knows. It was a headache and along the same lines of misery as a sinus infection. My 8 year old got it, too. she had a runny nose. (FWIW, we have a bunch of rapid tests from The Peak of Insanity around here so I took one when I got my cold. The rest of my family – DH and three young unvaccinated kids–except DD never caught it.)
I have not changed my masking behavior at all. Our most vulnerable population is vaccinated. My town, nearby towns, friends, and relatives–and most of my state in fact– is vaccinated.
I will still follow the rules, but I don’t believe there’s much value in masking *in most places.* I would send my kids to school without masks if it were allowed (it’s not).
For our family, the risk/benefit has greatly changed with vaccines. That’s not the case for everyone and I understand that, but we will not eradicate COVID. We will learn to live with it, like the flu or chickenpox, and people will catch it and recover; some people will catch it and have serious complications and some still may die. It sucks to be immunocompromised. It is unfortunate that there are people that will refuse the vaccine. Maybe one day we will come up with a better vax for this and the flu and RSV and all the other things out there that are viruses that have the potential for serious complications.
In the meantime, I will follow the rules but I will also continue to weigh the risks and benefits to my family. Double masking at the grocery store when vaccinated so that my kids won’t get a cold is not in the cards for me. My kids have strong immune systems and will get a vax when it’s cleared for them.
We don’t wear masks all flu season -some people do! that’s okay! I will never, ever, “mask shame” anyone and I am happy to oblige if anyone asks me or my kids to put a mask on. We stay home when we are sick.
Anon
Exactly this.
NYCer
+1. (Except I haven’t had covid, but I completely agree with everything you wrote.)
MechanicalKeyboard
Or you could’ve just worn a mask and avoided giving your kid a brand new plague but you do you!
Anonymous
I am the poster above. For all I know, she gave it to me. Or we both got it from a handrail somewhere. That’s sort of the point. It’s out there in the world now.
For our family, it is better to let our kids out in the world than to keep them in a protective bubble. I know not every family feels that way, and I respect their right to make those decisions.
Anonymous
You can still let your kids out in the world … with masks on them and all their classmates.
Anon
Sounds like you haven’t read up on the delta variant. Masking is definitely not theater.
No Face
I also live in a place where covid is and will continue to be awful. I keep reminding myself that this is not like last time, even though it is bad. My kids will see their vaccinated grandparents in-person, indoors, all fall and winter. They might even spend the night! I will see my vaccinated friends regularly. My older kid’s school district and younger kid’s daycare are acting sensibly, but even if they have to shut down I am comfortable hiring vaccinated babysitters this time around. I’m not worried about dying of covid.
On Twitter, I saw someone compare this to a group project where 3 of 4 people did the work, and the 4th keeps trying to hit delete.
Anonymous
The group project aspect to this is so true!
Anon
I am getting really angry about this. I work in public health and busted my @ss for months to help eradicate covid. I worked 95 hour weeks setting up and running covid vaccine clinics. I didn’t work that much for fun and now this backsliding feels like a slap in the face to my coworkers and I.
Now, the people who did what we were supposed to do (stayed home if possible, distanced, , wore masks, got vaccinated ASAP) are going back to restrictions because of anti vaxxers. It’s very frustrating and I’m getting very angry.
Anonymous
From this immunocompromised public health-adjacent worker to you, THANK YOU. Even if some people don’t value your sacrifice, I really, really do. Things could’ve been much worse.
Anon
I am in the US, and I really, really believed that this administration would do a better job listening to their experts and with public health messaging.
Instead, we got “no masks for the vaccinated!” (which didn’t actually incentivize a bunch of people to go get vaccinated, but did encourage unvaccinated antimaskers to do whatever they wanted), and then “actually, mask indoors, but only if transmissions rates are high” (shortly before practically all places became high transmission anyway). CDC continues to be underfunded and unable to track all relevant data. Children, the immune suppressed, and long COVID all continue to be an afterthought in policy (despite the advocacy of Fauci and others).
A family member woke up sick the other day and needed to be tested since they have high risk people in the household. It took a total of seven hours to find a testing center that was actually open (a bunch of sites were out of tests!). A lot of that time was spent waiting in the line for testing in the company of other people who needed testing because they thought they might have COVID.
I see so many people doing their best to help their communities and do the right thing, but I still don’t see effective and informed leadership or funding going where it’s needed most. For example, could we be recruiting and training nurses and other needed healthcare workers to help assist and relieve the people who have been working around the clock for more than a year? Are we finding ways to get vulnerable people out of congregate care? Are we supporting any K12 students who cannot safely attend school right now? In my communities, the attitude seems to be “it’s a pandemic of the unvaccinated; it’s over; nothing needs to change; we already won.” Epidemiologists meanwhile are distraught. I am still hopeful that we’ll basically get lucky, but I’m also angry.
Anonymous
Quick PSA that you can get rapid test kits now. We have them on hand. They are not PCR tests and it’s always best to go to get the official test, but a quick swab and 15 minutes and there’s a pretty decent shot that if you’re positive it will tell you. Yes, there are false negatives. But IMO it’s great to have it and then follow up with a PCR test when you can get one. My daughter and I both used them and it flagged our cases. My entire family went and got PCR tests (all neg except me and daughter) after but it took a couple days to get them and get results back.
Anon
Thanks; this is smart. I will look into this right away.
Anonymous
“I am in the US, and I really, really believed that this administration would do a better job listening to their experts and with public health messaging. Instead, we got “no masks for the vaccinated!” (which didn’t actually incentivize a bunch of people to go get vaccinated, but did encourage unvaccinated antimaskers to do whatever they wanted), and then “actually, mask indoors, but only if transmissions rates are high” (shortly before practically all places became high transmission anyway). CDC continues to be underfunded and unable to track all relevant data. Children, the immune suppressed, and long COVID all continue to be an afterthought in policy (despite the advocacy of Fauci and others).”
All of this. No one was listening to the immunocompromised when we begged to not go to a masking honor system. It sucks to feel invisible and unheard.
Anonymous
Where are you seeing Fauci advocate for awareness of long COVID? He keeps saying that the only outcomes we should be concerned about are hospitalization and death, and that “mild” infections (which often lead to long COVID) are no problem.
Anon
Yep. Fauci has ignored Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for decades which is Long Covid so don’t expect him to take it seriously.
help
I’m mostly…. sad.
I interact with a large pool of elderly people. My father’s doctor told him that probably he will not be able to interact freely in public… for the rest of his life. He is immunocompromised and elderly. He say his grandchild for the first time last month…. with masks and no touching.
For certainly populations, their lives have changed forever.
TallCareerLadySeekingTrueCareerClothes
This dress looks way too short to be a functional career dress for anyone who is t petite.
anon
And it’s really flouncy, which doesn’t look right in the office, IMO.
Anon
This doesn’t look flouncy at all to me and would be perfectly fine in any office I’ve ever worked in (all business casual but no jeans).
Anon
It goes to the top of the models knees – that’s a pretty standard length
Anonnymouse
Agreed. I know from experience that people sometimes perceive skirts to be shorter on a plus size body, vs the same length on a smaller person.
anonshmanon
I was thinking the same thing. OP, Do you think it’s showing too much skin because you are looking at a larger body?
Anon
Eyeroll. No.
Anon
Eyeroll anon, that’s almost certainly the reason somebody would look at this picture and think the dress isn’t modest enough for the office. It is.
anonshmanon
FWIW, I don’t necessarily think that ‘it’s almost certainly the reason’. Just thought it would be a possibility mentioning.
Anon
It’s not the right dress for this model. I am about her shape and height and this is the opposite of a type of dress I would wear and find flattering.
nuqotw
+1 on the length. It is not the shortest skirt/dress featured as work wear.
Cat
Looks OK to me on the model, but if you’re very tall perhaps not.
Ribena
I would totally wear this! It’s feminine but a solid colour, which is exactly my work clothing style. Unfortunately this brand doesn’t seem to be available in the U.K.
Cb
And we live in the North, where black tights are always in season :)
Ribena
The frozen North! Indeed
Anonymous
This dress looks fine to me, infact I really like it. I even took a screen shot for some thrift sewing inspiration to see if I could recreate something similar.
Anonymous
The whole shape of it–neckline, sleeves, silhouette, length–looks like a hospital gown.
Ellen
It looks that way because on a plus sized woman, it looks short, but I love A line dresses and I am petite. On a petite or regular sized woman, A line dresses work well in the summer because you get more air up through the legs, so your tuchus does not sweat as much. It also makes it easier to change into more comfortable clotheing when you get home.
Cora
I know folks here had a conversation about this before, so I thought I’d ask –
I just realized that the most recent refill of Buproprion I got is a different (still generic) brand that what I usually get. The color and size of the pill was completely different, and then when I looked at the label the manufacturers are different.
I’ve always been fine with generic buproprion but I know some folks had trouble with Wellbutrin vs. various generics. Does which generic it is make a difference as well?
No Problem
It depends on the person. But in general it is rare for someone to feel any difference between brand and generic, or between different generics. The only way you will know is if you try it and it doesn’t work the same.
Anon
I think it depends more on the med and the condition than on the person. I’m on several meds where, according to my specialists, it’s pretty common to notice the difference. I think that’s partly a matter of precision dosing (the margin of error permitted is more negligible for some meds than for others) and partly on the role of inactive ingredients. (The equivalency requirements for active ingredients are more stringent than for inactives, even when inactives are crucial as in extended release formulations.)
I personally think it’s also sometimes a matter of quality control. FDA says climate control is one of the bigger quality control issues they struggle to enforce (and that was back when they did more unannounced inspections than they’re doing now). Some meds are much more sensitive than others to heat and humidity, and of course the challenge of maintaining a controlled climate varies regionally.
No Problem
Fair points. I agree that meds with more precision dosing and/or extended release could have more problems. Bupropion is generally extended release, but the dosing isn’t as precise as, say, thyroid meds.
Anonymous
Yes different generics are usually produced by different companies in different labs. There is a pretty big spectrum of quality between manufacturers, for example Chinese manufacturers are known to be especially bad at controlling environmental conditions (humidity, heat etc).
Anon
This is a great question to ask the pharmacist that filled the script.
Anon
While this can be helpful, some pharmacists don’t believe patients that experience differences in generics. There is one generic birth control brand I could not take without getting very sick. The others didn’t bother me at all. My pharmacist would roll his eyes but would still order it for me.
Curious
Why are people jerks?! One of the most extraordinary things about my midwife medical team is that when I say something is a problem, they take it even more seriously than I do. For example, they’re going out of their way to see if I might be a candidate for an iron infusion (even though, in my last test, I was slightly above the threshold for clinical necessity) just because I said the anemia was hard and taking a toll. It’s shocking to just… be believed. And I’m a white wealthy woman. I didn’t realize how much I have been trained to minimize or doubt my pain. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be a person of color — it’s got to be at least double.
Cornellian
It’s becoming my pet topic here but Yay NPs and CNMs!
Anonymous
Yup same, also with a bc. I had to get my doctor to write me a rx specifically for the brand I needed.
Anon
I wouldn’t worry about this if you feel fine. But yes definitely different generic manufacturers are different, both hypothetically (because what regulations allow) and in practice.
Anony
For me it does. A prescription of mine has been the same manufacturer for years and years. A few months ago, I went to pick it up and it was a different brand. I felt like I was having mild withdrawal symptoms for an entire month and mentioned that to the pharmacist. She said it’s not that unusual because fillers than vary along with the actual strength; and that they had recently changed the ordering system to be automatic, thus the new generic brand. Needless to say, CVS special orders me the old brand every month. Since it’s still a generic, it hasn’t been an issue with my insurance. Definitely talk to the pharmacist.
Curious
I’m not sure for Wellbutrin, but back when I took a pill for birth control, the pharmacy went through a period where they changed the generic every month, and my anxiety spiked with the change every month. This stopped immediately when the doctor changed the prescription to require the name brand. I suspect the result would have been the same with a consistent generic. There was definitely a difference that affected me generic to generic.
Side note: for this reason alone, I was very grateful for my IUD.
Anon
I take a handful of rx meds every day – low thyroid, mild high blood pressure, vitamin D3, etc. I started on synthroid for my low thryroid when it was diagnosed in my 20s, and then my insurance started requiring me to take generic, so I took levothyroxine instead for years. The pill was constantly changing in appearance because I think several manufacturers make it.
For one period of time, the levothyroxine pill was sort of crumbly and it would leave a lot of residue in the pill jar. My TSH levels were all over the place, sometimes high, sometimes low, where they had always been pretty steady before. I went to my doctor and he switched me to a higher dose of levothyroxine because it appeared I wasn’t getting enough, and shortly after that I ended up in the ER with supraventricular tachycardia. It wasn’t a new thing for me but it was the worst episode I’d ever had and they had to stop my heart and restart it. My lab work indicated I was receiving way too much thyroid replacement
So after that, in addition to cardiac ablation surgery, my doctor switched me to name brand synthroid only, which I have to argue with the pharmacist about pretty much every time. I pay more, but it’s a consistent medication and I have found out the very hard way that taking a generic wasn’t giving me the right dose.
I mentioned that I take other drugs – one being to prevent arrhythmia, thanks levothyroxine!, and I have generics for that. The generic synthroid was the only one that ever gave me an issue.
Anon
Generics of levothyroxine really do not have a good track record on recalls. I’m sorry that happened to you.
I have to take combination meds to avoid tachycardia (history of POTS) and even so, I had a helluva time with a recall last year.
Anon
I had PSVT which was probably initially unrelated to but made worse by the thyroid issues. The episode where they had to stop my heart (IV adenosine, do not recommend for recreational purposes because it was awful!) made them finally decide I needed ablation. It seemed fixed for the last three years but I had another PSVT episode the other day, which totally bummed me out.
Good luck with your POTS! I had to look that up.
Anon
I realized after commenting that I didn’t mean to imply they were comparable (POTS is way less of a concern!). Just that juggling thyroid meds with cardiac issues when the thyroid meds have quality control issues sucks. I hope the PSVT settles down again and that that turns out to have been a fluke. Dosing really does matter with thyroid meds!
Anon
It does for me, specifically for my extended release bupropion. I would monitor how you feel on it – if you feel like your symptoms are less well-managed, definitely go back to your original manufacturer. Doctors/pharmacists offer NO information on this, so I had to scrounge around for anecdotal stories before realizing that the issue was the change in manufacturer.
Anonymous
It can make a difference. Teva-branded Impax-manufactured “Budeprion XL” (generic for bupropion XL) has been investigated for bioequivalence problems several times in the last two decades. The FDA actually recalled one dosage last year in 2020, and another back in 2012. (ProPublica should have the details on the older one.) I’ve had issues with that stuff myself, directly attributable to a switch from name-brand to Teva generic.
Unfortunately, the name brand is 4 digits expensive on many insurance plans. There’s some sort of “patient assistance” rebate program run by the original manufacturer to reduce the price, but it’s basically a long con to suppress generics, so some states (notably CA) have outlawed those programs. If your doctor’s clever with insurance, they might be able to find a workaround, but I couldn’t.
Anonymous
Another dog question!
My dog is medium/large (some sort of Golden mutt). He is usually fine with his dog friends and meeting new dogs. Starting last week, he has growled at two new dogs we passed on walks. They are about his size. He has never growled before and this is pretty scary to me (new pet owner). The dog is not yet 2 and we’ve had him for a year. This hasn’t been a doggy daycare problem, and they can do some training, but in the moment, how should I handle? I’ve pulled him back and made him sit and said NO. Neither time did the other dog do anything aggressive to set this off. Doggy daycare never flagged this as an issue (we’ve been sporadic lately, but should be able to return to weekly in another week to weekly visits when the kids go back to school). He gets about 5K of walking in and some kicking of the soccer ball when it cools down at night, so I don’t think it’s too much older puppy energy. I just don’t want a mean dog or a dog I eventually get afraid of.
Anonymous
A common way to train dogs not to growl or lunge at passing dogs is to start by training the “watch me” command. Then when you’re out for a walk and see another dog approaching, step to the side, have your dog sit, and tell him “watch me.” Continuously feed him treats to keep his attention, and praise him (“good watch me”) as long as he is looking at you. If he looks at the other dog, redirect with a “watch me” command and a treat and praise him when he looks back at you. Keep this up until the other dog is several paces past you, then give your dog one last round of praise (“good watch me!”). Then continue your walk with a “let’s go!” command. You can start working on this immediately, but it will work much better after he’s mastered “watch me” in a distraction-free environment.
Anon
Dogs are like people, they don’t like everyone. I wouldn’t stress about it.
Elderlyunicorn
Please bear in mind that I’m only saying some of this because you mentioned being a new dog owner. But as others have mentioned, dogs don’t always like all other dogs! You may not think those other dogs did anything “aggressive” but once you are more familiar with dog body language, you’ll start to notice that some dogs are masterful at giving other dogs “challenging stares”. Those dogs were probably giving your guy the stink eye.
Dogs aren’t mean … in the absence of guidance, they’ll just rely on their instincts. Some dogs’ instinct is to retreat, some dogs’ is to engage. Your role as the owner is to tell your dog what you WANT him to do. The more you feel confident about your relationship with your dog, and that he looks to you for guidance, I think you’ll feel much less concerned about “being afraid of” him.
Find a good, positive-behavior approach trainer and spend some time working with your pup!
Anonymous
Be careful about punishing a growl. That is close to the lower level on the fear scale and you don’t want to teach your dog that he can’t tell you when he is not comfortable. He may learn to skip the growl and escalate. I agree with the guidance to train your dog to watch you — what you want him to do.
I don’t let my dog meet certain dogs on our walk — I know he has a fear of some types of bigger dogs. We cross the street, turn the corner, etc so he doesn’t feel the need to react. Much better for everyone.
Anon
My dog usually has a conniption if the other dog hasn’t been neutered. Otherwise he’s one of the most popular dogs on the block. Do you know the status of these other dogs?
emeralds
Does anyone else feel like they’re hemorrhaging money now that things are more open again (for a certain value of “open”)?
Part of me is like, it’s fine, you were cooped up for fifteen months, of course you want to do things now that you can do (some) things. The rest of me is appalled that I just had to transfer money from my savings account to cover a couple of recent expenditures. Which is fine, I have the money, but it’s a point of pride that I never touch money once it goes into savings.
Alas.
Cat
We’re spending a more on our upcoming vacation than we normally would to compensate that it’s basically taking the place of 3 cancelled trips, but on the flip side, are so worried about testing positive and not being able to go that we’ve reverted to our early 2020 life of nothing but weekly grocery runs and occasional takeout so… balance?
emeralds
I think my balance is just out of whack at the moment, haha. But that’s okay, I’ll find it again!
Anonymous
TBH, when things were closed, I felt personally responsible to get takeout from all of the mom and pop restaurants I have loved. Many didn’t survive, but I felt that my $ was needed very much elsewhere. One pizza restaurant practically gives me royal treatment even now b/c of how I was often I was there in March 2020 and beyond.
Now, I am stepping back (plus, I gained about 10 pounds on that delicious food; still not comfortable being in a gym to address that). Unvaxxed younger kids, so not traveling, which I’d love to do. But the 20s and 30s crowd can have their bars back :)
emeralds
We’re DINKs so it’s the traveling that’s gotten us! …I say “us” but it’s really “me”…oops.
Curious
We are hemorrhaging money for a different reason (baby prep! She’ll be here in under a month!). But yes, after a year of no travel spending, two trips to see family in June and July definitely took us over budget. We had to download YNAB to recalibrate :). But do travel and report back! I want to live vicariously through you!
emeralds
Good luck with baby prep–that’s so exciting!
I’m going to London for New Year’s, conditions permitting, and I’m starting to take riding lessons again so had to pick up some gear for that :)
Curious
Omg both sound amazing :). Enjoy.
Anonymous
Not really, if anything I was wasteful during lockdown because I felt like I wasn’t doing anything. Now I’m not online shopping like it’s a hobby/ the only thing I have to look forward to is getting a package in the mail. Eating and drinking is a wash too; I was drinking at home too much and getting takeout a lot. Now I’m drinking and eating less but out with friends. I haven’t bought tickets to things like concerts yet because I’m not comfortable.
emeralds
I think this is probably some of it for me–my shopping ticked up a bit during lockdown since I wasn’t getting experiences, but now my experiences bucket is ticking back up without the co-requisite drop in shopping.
Anon
Yes absolutely. I’m putting myself on a strict spending diet when I return from vacation in a few weeks.
emeralds
Solidarity! I just bought a new backpack since I’m going back to the office next week, and that is IT for recreational spending in August.
Anonymous
What exactly were you saving the money for?
Do you need to adjust your budget and reduce your monthly savings now that things are open? I had to cut back on savings once we sent our kid back to sports, started getting takeout and haircuts, and went back to driving a little. It may not be reasonable to go on saving at the rate at which you were saving during lockdown.
Anon
This exactly. Commuting back to work = money for gas, car maintenance, some lunches out, work attire.
emeralds
The money was emergency fund/general savings, so nothing with a super-urgent purpose. We have about 4 months saved in the e-fund, but are trying to get to 6. So like…it’ll be good to have that, but not a huge deal at all to transfer a few hundred bucks out.
No plans to adjust our monthly savings targets at this point. I didn’t raise the auto-transfers during lockdown, but definitely was able to funnel more extra money into savings each month. Which is probably the money that I’m spending now!
Anonymous
Haha, yes. We’ve spent pretty much all the excess we saved in 2020 with never leaving home. But it has gone to big purchases. A down payment for a needed car and some planned home projects. I’m hoping our income/spending balance out over 2020 and 2021 together. It’ll be really close…
emeralds
Good luck!
Anon
YES
I need to stop
This is not advice. This is un-advice. But I just wanted you to know that you’re not alone.
emeralds
I thought I couldn’t possibly be the only one :) Thanks for the solidarity!
Anonymous
Actual fashion Q! Does anyone have this Karen Kane dress or any of the A-line ones? How thick is the fabric? Does it show any lumpy-squishies that arise from underwear elastic lines, or does it just float over you? I am now of the Thigh Society underpinnings due to chub rub, but often I can see some lumpiness from underwear, thigh pants, etc. through thinner fabrics and just want to look smooth and not lumpy in my clothes. I’m hoping an A-line shape helps, but some fabrics just need a slip or something to hide vs magnify the waist to hip area.
Anonymous
Suggestions for a nice way to convey over email that I can be available for “quick questions” but I am not available for new matters? I have outright said this but I don’t get a straight answer, so I need a better strategy. I’m a junior-ish partner and my colleagues often ask for my advice about issues in my litigation-oriented niche. Usually, I get an email asking for a “quick call” and 9 time out of 10 it morphs into me managing a new case. Sometimes colleagues will ambush me by including the client on the “quick call” and then the client will insist that no one but me may handle their matter. It’s a great compliment but I’m totally overwhelmed right now. We’ve lost a bunch of associates and staff within the past couple months and the senior partners don’t seem to be in a hurry to replace them. As a result, I’m now my own senior/midlevel/junior associates, paralegal, and secretary. The only way they’re going to actually hire help is if their work isn’t getting done, which is starting to happen, but while they think they’re busy with 6 billable a day I’m consistently billing 12+ a day and doing a ton of non billable work.
The other day, I got one of these “quick question” emails that forwarded a long string of back and forth with the client. I said I’m slammed for the next 3 days but I’m happy to set up a call after, otherwise I recommend Sue to help out. I got a snarky response that Sue is already helping and she just needed to check with me on something. Sue wasn’t on the email chain and she didn’t reach out to me, so I’m skeptical that that was the truth. But, I also feel badly that I might have said no to something that really was just a quick question. No one else seems to have this problem with “quick question” calls; I’ll talk to Sue later and she’ll be like why did you need me to cover that for you it was literally a 10 minute call. I want to be a team player, I don’t want to say no to something that is literally 10 minutes but I also need to protect my practice because I’m stretched too thin as is. I realize this problem seems like it should be easy but it seems that no matter what I do, I get roped into things I don’t want to do unless I shut it down from the very beginning. Help?
Anonymous
When you set up the call, tell your colleague that the client is NOT to be included.
Anonymous
“I’m happy to help but I cannot until [thursday, next week, 3 days from now…]” Wash, rinse, repeat. Be kind but firm.
S in Chicago
Not sure if this flies in law, but I’ll usually ask a few questions to get a sense of scope. If I can’t tell, then I’ll say I’m buried at the moment but I’ll give this 30/60/whatever minutes and if I can’t solve it we’ll need to find someone else or book time after (x date) to work it into the rest of my current projects. That helps clear the true simple matters without letting someone else sidetrack your day (and gives them incentive to find someone else sometimes if need be since they know you’re not always an immediately available dumping ground). And do NOT let anyone have a client on without prior notice—nip that in the bud. That’s better for the client as well. One day someone is going to see the sausage making and that’s bad for the company.
Anon
You clearly don’t need nice, you need firm and a much better ability to say no. Not that you have to be a jerk about it by any means, but I don’t think focusing on nice is going to help you here.
anon
Honestly, there’s nothing not-nice about telling people no, so long as you’re polite about it. “I’m able to participate in this call, but if there’s a need for ongoing representation coming out of it, I won’t be able to take that on” is a perfectly fine thing to say beforehand. It’s also fine to tell your colleagues “I’m not able to speak with a client about this until you and I have connected.”
Too often we slide into excusing and explaining and downplaying our own needs and availability. “I’m not able to do that,” without further explanation, is fine way more often than you might think.
CGM and sweaty exercise
Any tips for taking care of your curls after a very sweaty workout? A few cgm blogs suggest not even rinsing and then just doing a standard refresh, but I feel like I would be so stinky. I’ve been rinsing my hair out and then applying a bit of leave in conditioner and product afterward.
I’m pretty new to this process so appreciate any tips. I’m somewhere between a 2A and 2B curl type
Go for it
Try it out and see if you actually become stinky. I am soaked after a workout and blot with a curly hair towel and just move on. Never stinky. I wash my hair every 2-3 days.
Anon
I itch like mad unless I do a full wash. Half measures like a cool rinse still leave me feeling like my scalp is covered in bugs.
Anon
I have curly hair and I just wash if I get really sweaty. I don’t care what the cgm blogs say, washing your hair more often won’t kill you once in a while.
Anonymous
A stick of lipstick made its way into the laundry machine, and my (somewhat pricey) white bedsheets are now covered in pink stains. Will bleach get the stains out, or should I just replace the sheets? And how long would you keep stained bedsheets?
Cb
How fancy are they? Could some pink fabric dye make them look artistically spattered? I like pristine bed sheets but would keep them as a back-up. Somehow we destroy top sheets, so we have an odd collection of fitted sheets at the moment.
Anonymous
I laundered a cherry chaptick once and had good luck with several soakings in hot water & bleach (but would now use White Revive, or a combo of baking soda/vinegar + sunshine). I keep stained sheets b/c I feel like with kids and a dog, we need for a banner or craft project or to keep shedding off of things or when on travel.
Anonymous
Do not bleach, I repeat no bleach. Soak overnight with washing soda and cold water, ideally if you have a top load use the soak function because the agitation helps dissolve the washing soda, but if not just fill a laundry sink or a bathtub and stir well.
Anon
I don’t think hotels are tossing sheets over lipstick stains, so I would bet they can be bleached white again. What I know is if it’s a case for chlorine bleach, or something more like OxiClean, or more targeted stain removers.
Anon
*What I do NOT know. Sometimes the manufacturer will actually have advice on stain removal though (sometimes not).
Anon
It doesn’t hurt to try bleach on them, but if it’s a greasy stain it it might not work. After that, do you have kids, pets, messy hobbies,or plans to move any time soon? I’ve found it helpful to have old sheets for sick animals, to line the trunk of the car when moving messy stuff (like the Christmas tree), and for wrapping furniture and other large items when moving.
Anonymous
The whole reason I buy white natural fabrics is so I can bleach stains. If there are any particularly bad spots then you might want to pretreat them.
Anon
The whole reason I buy white natural fabrics is so I can bleach stains. If there are any particularly bad spots then you might want to pretreat them.
Anon
Any time I’ve tried to salvage expensive stained laundry, I wind up spending half the value of a new item on a pile of chemicals that don’t work. I’d just pitch them and start fresh.
Anonymous
Get some Red / Pink RIT and tie-dye to make it look intentional?
Anon
Bleach isn’t going to work at all. And probably nothing else is, unfortunately.
Silly Valley
I’ve had good luck with Dawn dish soap as a stain remover for things like this – it’s the greasiness of the lipstick that makes it so hard to remove. Dawn will break down the oil so that the detergent can try to get the color out.
Anon
Try blue Dawn, it’s amazing on greasy stains (since lipsticks contain oil).
anon
Went to look up which Carbona stain remover might work in this situation and found this article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.racked.com/platform/amp/2015/8/14/9130637/get-makeup-stains-out-of-clothes
It’s Carbona Stain Devils #6 for makeup. Usually available on Amazon and in grocery stores. For stain removal, I trust Jolie Kerr AND I trust those Carbona formulas, so highly recommend!!
London (formerly NY) CPA
Have they dried or are they fresh out of the washer with the stain? My experience is once they’ve washed and dried and not come out, you can’t do much more at that point. I’d probably give it a try with a good OxiClean soak, but if it doesnt come out then, I’d just give in and buy new sheets.
Anon
Soak for 48 hours in hot water (if your fabric allows), Dawn dishwashing liquid, and Oxiclean. Then wash. If stains remain, blot them with rubbing alcohol and repeat. The second washing can include bleach if you still see stains (again if your fabric allows).
Works for lipstick stains on church linens so might work for sheets.
Anon 2.0
I bet you can get this out with some blue Dawn dish soap and oxiclean. Lipstick is waxy so you need something to break that down.
JuniorMinion
Lestoil might work. put it on the stains directly, wait ten minutes and then wash in the hottest water possible for the fabrics in question with regular detergents. It has an aroma but its what i use when stain stick etc has all failed. As a bonus once you are done with the laundry it will also take grease stains off your garage floor.
Anonymous
FWIW, I did get Shingles Shot #1 and it did leave my arm pretty sore for days and a general feeling of fatigue (like first trimester of pregnancy hormonal fatigue). Luckily the fatigue passed after about day 4. I think my COVID shot was easier (just 12 hours of achiness after shot #2; all over by 24 hours past that shot). Have Shingles Shot #2 booked for this fall.
It was a run-around to get. Doctor called in an RX to a pharmacy and I got it there, even though the doctor administers other shots (tetanus).
Senior Attorney
Glad you were able to get it! I promise you it was worth it!
Anon
I had a strong reaction to my first Shingrix and very little to the second. I hope your experience is similar.
Anon
This is good to hear – I was really sick after shot #1 (way more than either COVID vaccination)
Anon
Has anyone here been diagnosed with Persistent Depressive Disorder/dysthymia and/or anhedonia? I think there was some discussion of this a few weeks ago but I couldn’t find it. Anyway, if anyone has, I’m wondering what treatments or lifestyle choices have helped? There’s not a ton of info on the internet about this. I’m on Lexapro and doing CBT, and have been for a year, and think it’s time I explore additional modalities because I had small improvement and then plateaued.
Anon B
I haven’t been diagnosed so apologies if this response hits the wrong note, but I contend with something similar and the main thing that helps is intense exercise, including hiking, cycling, any kind of skiing, swimming, and definitely working out with a trainer and working up to heavy Olympic lifts 2x-week. Working out with a trainer has been the cornerstone of my self-treatment, because it’s a commitment device. If you’re comfortably diving into something like CrossFit, then a gym with the right group that enthusiastically supports each other can be enormously helpful too. Perhaps tennis or squash lessons on the more intense side might help too.
Anon
Thanks! I used to be an athlete and have wondered recently if the timing of the onset of my symptoms corresponds to when I stopped playing sports in high school….
help
+1
This is a very good idea.
Of course, talking with your doctor about changing your medication does, or medication. Not all people respond well to SSRI. You may need a different dose, a different medicine, or sometimes – a combination of 2 medicines at small doses.
Anonymous
You might want to talk to your doctor about adding an antidepressant — something besides Lexapro — to your regimen. Lexapro is great for anxiety, but not so great for depression. The combination of Wellbutrin and Lexapro is often prescribed.
Anon
I’m on Wellbutrin but no longer doing regular therapy. Regular exercise makes such a difference for me, even though it can be such a slog. I was also told by my therapist to avoid CATS — caffeine, alcohol, tobacco, and sugar. Not drinking (very much) absolutely makes a big difference for me as well.
pugsnbourbon
My wife has treatment-resistant depression. Here are some things that have been helpful:
– get a doctor specifically for medication management – either a psychiatrist or a licensed psychiatric nurse. You need someone who will work with you to try different meds/combos of meds.
– if possible, get a Gene Sight test. This can show you which meds will work better for you.
– ketamine infusions are a real silver bullet for some folks. It’s expensive and most insurance won’t cover it, but that’s starting to change. It wasn’t super-effective for my wife but others have done really well with it.
– transcranial magnetic stimulation has been fairly effective for my wife. It’s typically a third or fourth-tier type of treatment, but keep it in mind if things don’t improve.
I hope you start feeling better soon.
pugsnbourbon
More – don’t be afraid to switch up therapists if you aren’t clicking with someone.
Get bloodwork done; some deficiencies are linked to depression symptoms.
Anon
What have you successfully used to touch up roots between salon visits? I’m a level 4 brunette (about 25% gray) with hair that shows roots within 5 days of coloring.
I tried tinted dry shampoo, but it was just terrible. I want to be able to scrape my hair back for a professional/formal updo without having the “distinguished” temples of a male model in a European beer ad.
Anonymous
I feel that if you are 25% gray and want to hide that, it may be easier to go to a darker blonde so you have dark roots vs staying dark brown, where the roots are gray.
Just one person’s opinion. I have temple streaks so I just abandoned coloring after trying it 2x on brown hair and hating the grow-in aspect to it. Temp color just ruined all my nice towels, so that is NOT the answer.
Anony
I’m ‘darkest brown’ with probably 40% gray and have the same issue – I’ve had success with Clairol Root Touch-Up color (it only has to set for like 10-15 minutes and covers my grays perfectly). I use that every couple weeks. For in between times, I use Madison Reed Root Touch-Up Powder. It ‘sticks’ to my hair well and lasts almost all day.
Formerly Lilly
I’ve actually had pretty good luck disguising the grow out line of gray at my temples with a Bobbi Brown foundation brush and the appropriate shade of Bobbi Brown eye shadow. Use brush to apply shadow to hair. It doesn’t cover fully, but blends it in sufficiently to keep it from being glaringly obvious. I used this method for several years before I just gave up on color.
FWIW, I can also recommend transitioning to no overall color, and instead balayage in my original natural color plus low contrast highlights plus low contrast low lights, and otherwise just letting the gray come in. I’m getting away with touch ups to this every 8 to 10 weeks and it hits my personal sweet spot of fairly natural looking but just obvious enough to look “done”.
Anonymous
A somewhat lighter all-over color plus highlights will make the roots stand out less. For an updo, I’d use the mascara-like root concealer.
Katie
What about a color depositing conditioner? I have used one from Chi and one from Bumble and Bumble (but lots of companies make them) that can help blend the roots if it’s been a while. While it’s not really a full touch up, it helped me go longer between colorings until I gave up entirely over quarantine. They’re a pretty inexpensive solution if they work for you.
annonn
Your roots show in 5 days? Coloring in your current color does not seem sustainable. At least- it would not be for me. Others are suggesting going lighter so the roots show less, which sounds like a good solution if you want to continue coloring. I decided recently, after many years of coloring my hair, that I could not be bothered anymore. The regrowth was coming too fast and the amount of grey (probably 25-30%) was making the regrowth too obvious. I found something called the “dye strip technique” online to help with the transition. It works for me as my hair is quite straight, always side-parted in the same spot, and has majority grey on top instead of at the temples. YMMV.
Anon
Google calendar question. If person X and person Y are sharing a calendar, is there a way for person X to add person Z without person Y knowing (like a BCC on an email)? Person Z does not need to have editing privileges, just to see it.
Or is there a workaround, such as duplicating the calendar and then inviting person Z to the duplicate?
I share custody of my kid with my ex-spouse. My new partner lives with me and kid, and I would like to have him see the calendar that shows the days that kid is with us, sports/lessons dates and times, and school closures and events, etc. My ex, however, is very touchy about new partner and I really don’t want to cause a fight/drama over this little thing.
Any advice appreciated!
anonshmanon
It’s like a google doc. If the calendar is shared with you, then you can see who else it is also shared with and what level of access they have.
A workaround would be if you add yourself as guest on all kid-relevant invites and share YOUR calendar with new partner.
MK
Create a separate calendar that is just shared between you and new partner, and copy the relevant events from the XY calendar to the XZ calendar. It’s not automatic, but if you click on the event, then “options”, “Copy to ___” should come up for your other calendars.
Anonymous
This is what DH does. We have a family calendar and he also has a work- family calendar so he can see how family stuff relates to his various meetings.
Paging in house attorneys
Follow up to yesterday’s post where a couple of posters offered to help with in-house resumes and interviewing – please post again if you are willing to help, and A burner email where I could contact you (or I can post mine if that’s easier). Thank you!
anon
I’m happy to email you if you can post a burner!
anon
One of the in-house counsel from the other thread. Would be happy to help w/ resumes & interviewing! Please post a burner email & I’ll reach out to you!
Anon
We added a couple of new rooms to our house and want someone to suggest a good way to furnish them to optimize storage and usage. At the same time I dont want it to cost a ton. Is there a way we could have someone consult with us and make a few suggestions? I dont expect it to take more than a couple of hours and maybe not more than $200-300? Is this reasonable and how do I find this person?
Anon
Use an online service like Modsey. And $200-300 is just flat unrealistic if you’re looking for professional help. People’s time and expertise is worth something.
Anon
Thanks, that’s helpful. Any suggestions how much I should expect to pay?
Anon
About $175-250/ hour and most interior designers won’t do projects for less than a certain number (which varies) but you won’t get 1 hour of time. Modsey and online space planners are much cheaper and will probably serve your needs.
Anon
Sometimes I feel like we are living through two different pandemics. I work remotely with people around the country. I live in a major city with over 70% vaccination rates and everyone wears masks everywhere. One of my coworkers who lives in rural Ohio said she gets glares when she wears a mask to the grocery store and literally no one is wearing them anywhere — it’s like the pandemic isn’t even happening.
Do you all think a year from now we will still be masking and distancing? When do you think the pandemic will end, realistically?
Anon
This is something that’s been giving me a lot of anxiety lately because I think the answer is yes. I am not a scientist, but I do stay pretty up to date on virus news. It seems to me that we will at least be masking during certain contexts/during certain months for the indefinite future. I just don’t see anyway around it, it seems like there will always be vaccine-resistant variants that are rampant in certain parts of the world and certain parts of the country. It’s a really depressing realization and I hope I’m wrong.
Anonymous
Vaccinations for kids in the next 6 months will make a big dent in the pandemic. Likely will see variant boosters by then. DH and I are fully vaxxed but life isn’t back to normal because we have 3 little kids. We’re much better off than 6 months ago and in another 6 months I think it will be ‘over’ and more like the seasonal flu with deaths/spread every year but solid vax options. It takes a while to vax an entire population in one country let alone basically the whole planet. I hope we stay like Asia through where people masked pre-pandemic if they were sick and on public transit etc.
anon
Gov. John Bell Edwards said last week that the pandemic will be over when everybody does what it takes to end it. So… never?
Anonymous
There are definitely huge disparities, my city is currently at 75% of eligible adults fully vaccinated plus mask compliance. I do feel safer than a lot of other posters here seem to. However my city is aiming for 90% vaccination rate and I’m really hoping we manage to get there so I can actually feel safe instead of just ‘safer’. If my city hits it’s target I think life will effectively go back to normal.
A + Fed
I think it depends on what our tolerance for case numbers is in the future. This virus isn’t going anywhere and will remain active (and probably mutating) with us in the future. We have a tolerance for 60k flu deaths, 14K RSV adult deaths and 38k traffic deaths per year, we’ll reach a tolerance for covid deaths at some point.
Anonymous
The problem is that now we aren’t masking and distancing. This means that a year from now we will still need to be masking and distancing, and we still won’t be. It will never end.
Elle
I think someone asked the question last week if anyone knew someone who had a breakthrough covid infection. Well as of yesterday, I do. I got the Pfizer vaccine in April and in the last 3-4 weeks I’ve been riskier than I should have been- eating at restaurants indoors 1x a week, going to the gym unmasked 2-3x a week. I just have a stuffy nose and a fever, but I just wanted to remind everyone to be safe! It sucks and I feel like an idiot for letting my guard down.
anon
Is this really different than a cold though? Are you going to lock yourself down again because of this?
roxie
can you not, please?
my sister’s fam of four – 2 vaxxed adults and 2 unvaxxed kids – got it from an unvaxxed daycare teacher (who btw has been in the hospital for 3 weeks with her covid and frankly I have zero sympathy for her). Sure, it’s “just a bad cold” for the adults (though that actually means for one of them weeks of steroids, inhaler, etc) but it’s ALSO 6+ weeks of quarantine for their 6 year old (based on how slowly the positive tests traveled through their household somehow) who already missed in-person kindergarten for a year, and more missed summer camp weeks for them, 4+ weeks of a missed special program for their just-diagnosed autistic 4 year old, and more isolation, lost time at job, and general awfulness for all of them.
This “just a bad cold” idea is grossly incomplete.
anon
Right and all of those people in your sister’s family are fine which is why we should treat covid as a cold and not this big huge scary thing anymore. The problems you cited are the reaction to covid, not covid itself.
roxie
oh, do people quarantine and miss work and school for 6 weeks due to a cold?
Anonymous
Are you seriously arguing that we shouldn’t quarantine people who are known to be infected? With our vaccination rates, that is a surefire ticket to overflowing ICUs and refrigerator trucks full of bodies.
Anon
I know dead people. You can take that attitude and shove it.
Anonymous
Me too. Vax’d in the spring and got covid from who knows where last week. Headache, stuffy nose, etc.
But I’m over it and I’m not planning to lock myself down any time soon.
Cornellian
Oof, sorry to hear that. I’ve known about 20 people who have had breakthrough cases and given it to their kids in the last month. It seems like the vaccinated adults were 19/20 okay but one is in the ICU. Half the kids seem fine, but a couple got profoundly ill. I cannot wait for childrens’ vaccines and general population boosters to become available!
Jeffiner
My vaxxed cousin got it from some friends, idk if the friends were vaxxed or not. My cousin then spread it to his (also vaxxed) brother and mother. It was like a bad cold for my cousins, my aunt actually had no symptoms although she tested positive. The real concern was that they live with my 93 year old grandmother, who is vaxxed, but for whom any illness is a concern. They all double-masked, and cousins avoided grandmother for a couple weeks, and everyone is fine now. But it was scary for all of us.
Anonymous
So I’m at the point now where I am uncomfortable even taking out the trash in my apartment building – it’s a tower with trash rooms on each floor – to say nothing of taking the elevator. So I don’t leave for a week at a time and then double masked even for the trash which I can usually time so as not to see anyone. Southern city, so no one masks and in a building full of young people (25-30) so they’re out living life. Yes I’m vaccinated but the long term effects of this scare me and right now they aren’t able to say vaccines prevent long term effects. Do I have any choice here but to move? I’d hate to buy a house at the peak of the market just for this (though I’m at the point life wise where I was thinking about buying) and even buying isn’t going to be instant as I’d have to go through making bids and losing out on houses. The one therapist I tried wasn’t helpful – it was all live life, just wear a mask. Yet it’s my other medical conditions that concern me. WWYD? Move/buy? Something else?
Anonymous
Wear an N95 mask and live your life — outdoors. I think the chances of getting sick while vaccinated and masked and briskly going in and out of your apartment building are basically nil. Keep up with therapy, but get a different therapist if you don’t find yours to be helpful.
Anon
Get another therapist and move to a small townhouse or small apartment block where you don’t have to worry about hundreds of people. You might be on the upper end of understandably but overly anxious, there is no reason to make a life decision like buying due to this. But you do need better professional help.
Anonymous
Can you just avoid peak times? When I lived in an apartment I was very aware of what time’s the ‘elevator traffic’ was. What about taking the stairs? I routinely used to walk 6 levels at my last apartment because I didn’t feel like waiting for an elevator, plus it’s exercise, which if you’re inside all the time you probably are missing out on anyways. That said I’ve occasionally had to take the 25 flights of stairs at my job and it wasn’t fun.
Anon
Oh gosh no, I don’t think I’d try to buy a house for this reason alone. There’s an anxiety or obsessive compulsive component of your fear that’s not normal and I don’t mean that to shame you but to tell you it doesn’t have to be like that. I would focus on getting help for that, which probably means looking for a new therapist.
Senior Attorney
If you want to live in a single family house, I feel like you could rent one, right? Then figure out if you want to buy at your leisure.
But yes, more therapy seems indicated for your anxiety.
No Problem
This sounds like anxiety for sure. Your brain is taking a fear of a very unlikely (though not impossible…just very unlikely) scenario and turning it into something far worse. If you’re not already on medication for anxiety, please consider seeing your doctor and getting an Rx. Yes, find another therapist, but the medication will really help your brain stop freaking out so that you can evaluate your true risk more rationally. You take care of your other medical conditions, take care of this one.
All that said, if buying a house will help you feel better in the long run, then buy a house! Or rent a house. But you will have to deal with so many more encounters with different people in the process (realtor/landlord, movers, etc.), which might be difficult with where your anxiety is right now.
Anon
With kindness and good thoughts for you – N95 and therapy for anxiety. Your concerns are valid, but your anxiety over them seems to be crippling you. Going out and buying a house right now for this reason alone seems drastic.
Anonymous
+1. OP, it’s tough, it really is, but you can feel better than this, I PROMISE YOU. I’m high-risk, the vaccine likely doesn’t work for me, Delta is rampant in my community, and I attend all medical appointments and other necessary tasks with an N95 and I don’t worry to an excessive degree. Therapy and possibly medication may really help you and you deserve to feel better. It’s not good to be stuck in your house – it has a real harm on mental health.
Anonymous
I would move to an apartment with a separate outdoor entrance and in-unit laundry. I will never again live in a high-rise building with shared hallways, stairwells, elevators, etc.
Anon
I promise you won’t get covid from taking the garbage out.
Anon 2.0
Taking my first flight next week since covid began. Because of the airport I need to fly into, a layover in another city was unavoidable. Any tips? I am vaccinated, will be wearing a mask (should I double mask?). Layover is super short thankfully but I am still likely to at least need a snack and drink while there. Generally, I am careful but not to an extreme. However, because my trip is to visit older, higher risk family members I haven’t seen in 2 years, I want go above and beyond in taking care.
roxie
make sure your mask is a KN95 or N95 and not just a silly cloth mask. yes double mask. Be mentally prepared to see tons of people wearing their masks incorrectly or not at all and inconsistent enforcement.
Consider a few days quarantine upon arrival and a rapid test if you want to be extra safe, or consider masking with the at-risk people you are seeing – I haven’t done that but am considering it for my next flight (if i end up going at all).
Cat
I would have your snack and drink on the plane (wait until everyone else is finished eating) rather than in the airport, thanks to infinitely better air filtration mid-flight.
Cornellian
+1. you could also take an alcohol wipe to wipe down your armrest/tables.
I took my first covid flight for a funeral last month, and the worst part was a delay causing us to miss a layover and then have an unexpected 15 hours in the airport. Obviously it’s not every flight, but 15
hours in a flyover airport with ~70% mask compliance was way more nervewracking than the planned 45 minute stay, and way less comfortable, of course.
Anonymous
Sounds super stressful! Some airports have day rooms for red-eye layovers – might be worth the splurge.
Anonymous
I went through the same scenario right as the Delta variant was starting to uptick, and I felt good after the fact about taking the following approach. I wore an N95 mask with head straps for a tight fit, with a cloth mask on top, both at the airport and on the flights. During my layover, I found an isolated area (inactive gate) at the airport where I felt comfortable removing my masks to eat and drink. If I hadn’t been able to find an isolated area, I wouldn’t have removed my masks to eat and drink. In my opinion, I was too close to other people on the plane to feel comfortable removing my masks there, no matter how good the ventilation was. My approach may have been more cautious than necessary, but I appreciated having no regrets or concerns that I was contaminating my older, higher risk family members.
Anonymous
Best dentist/orthodontist in Boston? I want a total smile makeover and have some spacing and an underbite.
SF assoc
Does anyone here have a pair of Thursday boots? Are they as good as they look or am I just being falling prey to the Instagram ads?
Anonymous
I do and I love them. They are really nice quality. I’m looking forward to cooler temps so I can wear them again. Be warned, for me they ran 1/2 to 1 full size too small.
Bronski
I bought a pair as a gift for my elderly dad. They were good looking and high quality. Unfortunately, they were too rigid for him given his age and so not a comfy fit for all day wear. The return super easy and my money was refunded right away when the package was dropped off. Great experience and would buy again for others or myself even.