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One of my favorite things I've gotten recently is this highlighter from Danessa Myricks Beauty — I feel like it's just so pretty on. It looks a bit intimidating with the iridescent colors, but after you blend it into your skin it's just a subtle but powerful highlighter effect. I have the “Femme” color, pictured.
(Comparing it to other highlighters I love and still use, it's a bit more purple-y and less peachy than my Glossier Haloscope (in Quartz, I think), and a bit more shimmery than my Armani fluid highlighter, which is a more pearly pink. I also always use the highlighting pencil from Benefit below my brows; this is much less opaque than that, with a lot more dimension.)
The pictured highlighter is $20, at Sephora. Do you have any fun new beauty finds, readers?
Sales of note for 9.30.24
- Nordstrom – Beauty deals through September
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 50% off select styles
- J.Crew Factory – Up to 60% off everything + 50% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Friends & Family 25% off
- Rag & Bone – Friends & Family 25% off sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Fall Cyber Monday sale, 40% off sitewide and $5 shipping
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
Porch
Reposting because I was late to the morning thread …
We really would benefit from an additional space in our house to do art projects, play cards, do messy kids stuff, etc. We are thinking about screening in our back porch to accomplish that. But I have never actually lived somewhere with a screened in porch, have just enjoyed them in vacation homes. And I keep getting stuck on how this works in practice – can you leave stuff on a screened in porch all the time? Or have to worry about rain? And is there outdoor furniture that’s actually really comfy or will never be a place that people want to sit on a comfy chair and read? Appreciate any thoughts. I’m not sure we can afford an addition to do a totally closed in room but if that’s realistically what we need to achieve this goal may be better to put it off. We are in the DC area.
Cat
How do you use your patio today? Would you use it a lot more except for bugs and rain? Because a screened porch solves like 90% of bugs and like 50% rain; if it’s a blustery day the wet def comes through the screen.
Anon
We definitely would. Mosquitoes are terrible here for most of the summer.
Anonymous
kind of depends on the porch. I’ve seen ones that are more than screened in- they have glass panels that go up so you keep all weather out. Those are more “3 seasons.” A basic screened in porch is the equivalent of sitting on a patio less the bugs. You want indoor/outdoor furniture in the latter; can get away with something like wicker & fabric in the former.
In your case I’d put a table out there for arts and crafts
Anon
My grandma started with a ground-level, covered porch fully open to the air. One year she screened it in on all sides. A year later she got heavy flexi-plastic “storm” windows to install during colder months to keep the precipitation and wind at bay. The following year, she framed in and sided the lower half all around to make it more snow-proof. The next year, she insulated the floor, sided section, and roof, then had real windows installed. Now it is fully heated and air conditioned and she uses it as a second living room.
Moral of the story: you don’t have to go all-in right away, but you also don’t have to wait to enjoy some improvement to the space right now.
bird in flight
My grandma did this exact process too, but over about 15 years.
anon
We are in the Boston burbs and have one. It absolutely gets wet in rain and snow for that matter. Covered in pollen in May/early June. We don’t put our non-plastic furniture out until the peak of pollen is gone (so June 1 roughly) and roll out the indoor/outdoor rug after that point in the season, too. There is a portion of the porch that does not get wet-wet, the middle, but definitely damp in rain. That all said, we ADORE it. We don’t use it as you intend to but I’m team Screened In Porch in general.
Anon
We have a screened-in porch and use it the majority of the year. We live in the SEUS. The porch has a fan, so we can use it for some of the summer. We also have a heater that got during Covid– it works similar to a heat lamp, so we can use when it’s chilly but not super cold.
We have outdoor furniture that we got from Lowe’s– it stays out there year round. The furniture is plastic– we’ve noticed the same furniture at a bunch of restaurants. The cushions start looking rough every few years. We have replaced them once– unfortunately, it’s almost cheaper to replace the whole set than the cushions.
We put carpet down on our porch, so it isn’t actually great for us for messy stuff. The floor for us was wood slats, and bugs were coming in through the slats before we put the carpet in. It was also getting too hot in the summer to walk on, and we wanted to be able to be barefoot on the porch.
Anon
I would love a product that is somewhere between liquid highlighter and a foundation. A little coverage, a little shimmer. Any ideas?
Lydia
Supergoop glowscreen (or one of the many dupes) might do the trick!
towelie
Charlotte Tilbury Hollywood Flawless Filter. I use it has a highlighter when I want something more natural, I don’t know if it would wear it alone on my whole face but I’m already oily. Sometimes I’ll layer it under foundation as well. ELF makes a dupe but I have not tried it.
Supergoop Glowscreen could also work.
Anonymous
I wear Flawless Filter on my whole face in place of foundation and constantly get compliments on my skin. And my skincare routine is otherwise average at best so I attribute it to flawless filter. I’m not super oily though. It’s my favorite product – I also layer it under foundation as a primer sometimes, or over foundation depending on my desired look.
Anon
NARS radiant tinted moisturizer has a dewy look and is as light as you put it on – I use a bare amount for just evening out my skin tone. I don’t rely on it for SPF, of course.
Anonymous
IT Cosmetics CC cream, either the Glow or the Illuminating. Bonus that it has a decent SPF.
Anonymous
I’ve heard of people just mixing highlighter into their foundation or sunscreen or whatever…
Sallyanne
Chanel water tint might be something to look at
United miles
Those of you who’ve had United miles for a while…are they kind of “limited” in terms of redeeming them? I’ll try to explain what I mean. It’s sort of like I feel short-changed when redeeming them? I’m just starting to travel properly again post pandemic, and pre-pandemic, I lived in Asia and had miles/status on an Asian airline. With that one, I could often cash in a reasonable # of miles for fully free tickets.
What I’m seeing now with United is that all the rewards travel is like “X points + Y dollars.” I just looked up a rewards ticket that would be $300 cash…or a bunch of my miles and $120. Definitely a nice discount, but doesn’t really feel like a reward ticket. Am I doing this wrong? Or did they design the program so it’s pretty weighted against the customer?
Anon
In short, yes, it’s generally not easy to get an awesome value although that sounds unusually bad.
The best redemptions are typically on international business class tickets, which are often in the high four figures or even five figures if you pay cash. Partner airlines generally have lower rates, but partner reward tickets can be hard to find on United’s website. There’s a whole subsection of the internet devoted to how best to accrue and redeem miles.
Cat
The $ are for taxes and fees – some itineraries are a lot higher on those than others. Heathrow is like $300 a person from the US to fly into. I used miles to book a trip to Paris for later this year and it’s $67 cash on top of the miles.
Domestic travel the $ is usually not much at all, like Florida is $10 or $20pp cash.
Cat
Sorry my experience is on American and I was just focusing on the difference between US carriers and how the Asian carriers may have operated. $120 in taxes seems high if the ticket was only $300 cash to begin with, and so I def wouldn’t squander miles on that low ROI.
Is it Friday yet?
It’s generally not worth using miles for domestic tickets. There are calculators online, but you get more value for the points on longer-haul flights. I save them (I have a ton from the credit card) to fly Polaris to Europe, etc. You can also use them to try to upgrade economy tickets, e.g. I flew to Dublin on an economy booking and upgraded for $20k miles + $500 each way. The United subreddit has some pointers for maximizing value.
Is it Friday yet?
And yes, you have to pay cash for the taxes, which depend on the airport/country.
anon
I have nightmares that vary in terms of frequency and severity. Right now I’m at a high point and having them every night/sometimes twice a night and it’s pretty disruptive to sleep. does anyone else struggle with this/have any suggestions? I aready have a therapist so can raise with her as well.
Anon
Have you already brought it up with a primary care doc? Sometimes this is more “sleep specialist” territory than therapist therapy, depending on what’s causing it.
anon
I haven’t, but that makes sense and I will do.
Anonymous
Sleep specialist is totally the way to go. Can be stress or physical things like disordered breathing or sleep interruption.
Anonymous
Are you otherwise sleep deprived? I get night terrors (where I’m half awake and think there’s an intruder, etc.) and I only get them when I’m sleep deprived (or, all the time now that I have an infant). Also, if you are taking melatonin, it can make nightmares worse. Agree with the suggestion to speak with your PCP too.
Anonymous
+1 for the melatonin note.
I’m sorry you’re going through this! I always heard you didn’t remember your dreams unless you were interrupted during a sleep cycle, so I’m guessing you’re exhausted as well as terrified.
Explorette
If I get too hot at night, I’ll have nightmares. Also if I take melatonin.
Anon
I get sleep paralysis and 99% of the time it’s stress related. Stress can be a million things on your to-do list or underlying unhappiness. Work on resolving the things that keep you up at night.
I find it easier to calm down after a nightmare if I move to the living room, watch a pleasant tv show, and fall asleep on the couch. If I try going right back to sleep in bed the residual stress just leads to a second nightmare.
Green eyed monster
I recognize that this is probably a “me” issue and something I need to work on. But I am extremely jealous of my sister.
She has never dyed her hair and has no interest in starting even as the grays come in. Her hair is black. I’m blonde and I’ve been coloring my hair for years and I started getting specific highlights to hide it after I noticed my first gray hair. My sister has never worn makeup, even for her wedding. She has no interest in botox, anti-aging stuff or skin (retinol etc) beyond sunscreen and drug store moisturizer.
I’m not in law but my sister is. She’s been a public defender her entire career. I’m Big 4 accounting, on track to make partner. My sister doesn’t live in New York so it’s not like I’m seeing her daily. She has always been this way so I don’t know why this is suddenly bothering me now.
My sister always dresses impeccably and looks put together both inside and outside of work. But I’m so jealous that she doesn’t care about gray hairs or botox and is confident enough to never even own makeup. I don’t like feeling this way. She’s never said anything negative about me getting botox, wearing makeup or coloring my hair. She’s a nice person. I don’t like feeling the green eyed monster towards her when she didn’t do anything.
I don’t know why I’m suddenly so bothered. Has anyone ever felt jealousy towards someone else over their confidence in aging naturally or going barefaced? I recognize that this is my problem to deal with.
(Also I’m turning 39 this year and my sister is turning 45)
Anon
I’m exactly like your sister (except I may dye my hair in the future) and about the same age, but for me it’s less about confidence and more about laziness and cheapness. All of this stuff is expensive and time consuming and there are so many things I’d rather do with my time and money. Maybe it helps to reframe it that way?
Anon
So make herself feel better by thinking/ pretending her sister is cheap/lazy? Why it assume her sister is confident and doesn’t care what others think?
Anon
I mean, I’m not suggesting she call her sister cheap and/or lazy. That would be incredibly rude. But I do think many women (me included) opt out of this stuff because they feel like their time and money is better spent elsewhere, and maybe thinking of that perspective would be helpful to OP.
Anon
Yeah, I’m also like the sister, and I’ll freely admit to being cheap and lazy. I care about how I look, but not enough to spend that much time and money on my appearance. It’s just a resource allocation issue, not that I’m so shockingly confident that nothing matters to me.
Anon
In this scenario I am your sister. I don’t wear makeup, don’t color or treat my hair, have no interest in botox, etc. I am mid-40s and feel like I look my age. From my perspective, I feel like a clown if attempting to wear makeup or trying to do anything beyond clipping my hair up in a claw. I often feel less put-together than my peers because I feel kind of “undone” when around someone with a nicely applied face of makeup and who obviously knows how to style their hair. Sometimes I spend a Saturday morning trying to figure it out myself, then get frustrated because I look stupid and fake and just cannot.
Not sure if it helps to hear this perspective, just wanted to share that the grass isn’t always greener.
If the upkeep is what has you frustrated, have you tried simplifying your own routine to see if you can acclimate and like a more natural look? Maybe go without makeup on weekends and see if you can become comfortable that way, and then spread it to Fridays at work, etc.?
Anon
I think your sister would be amazed to hear this. I also bet sometimes she looks at how you do it differently and has a touch of jealousy. That’s part of sisterhood.
anonshmanon
I’d even say that if I were you, I might bring this up with your sister at a convenient time. You grew up similarly, but you’ve always appreciated how she doesn’t bother with some of these beauty chores – ask if that came to her naturally or how her thought process developed. I bet she has something to share, and because she’s your sister, there is a good chance it might resonate with you!
Anonymous
I agree that this would be something interesting to talk about, and that she very well may have these feelings in reverse. Perhaps you can also look at this as admiration as opposed to jealousy/envy, which takes away the negative self-judgment you seem to be imposing on yourself that seems to be the source of the guilt you mention about having these feelings.
I will also say that I think the different career paths you’ve taken can somewhat explain the differences. The social pressures in each are a bit different and we all succumb somewhat to social pressures.
Vicky Austin
+1 frankly. Sisterhood is complicated. Claire Lombardo described it in The Most Fun We Ever Had as “tinged with jealousy and double standards and affection as deep and intractable as marrow,” and in the repair of my relationship with one sister, and the evolution of my relationship with the other, I have found that to be decidedly true.
I recently was talking about my sister to my parents and said, “she is That B!tch,” and they weren’t familiar with the term (I explained it as similar to saying someone is “the sh!t”). My sister is amazing – she runs spontaneous half-marathons with her husband, has a fabulous job in a glamorous office that she kicks ass at, has dressed like a stylish twenty-something since she was in junior high, etc. No one ever had to teach her how to put on eyeliner; meanwhile I still have no idea. But I know her, and I know she’s struggling with the rat race, her long and arduous commute eating up her personal time, they have a new puppy who is Challenging, and she’s staffed on a project with an incredibly difficult and high-stakes client who is making her life hell right now. And she comes to me asking for advice on fighting with her husband as they settle into being married, or dealing with our parents, or birth control that won’t make her feel like a rage monster. Somehow, sisterhood dynamics tend to be magnified in these feminine differences of makeup and hair that probably took root in vulnerable preteen times, and here we are, but there’s so much more to a sister relationship.
This got rambly, but TL;DR I’ve been where you are and I wish you the best, however you figure it out.
Anon
It sounds like maybe you are doing these things because you’re afraid of what people think of you, rather than because you personally enjoy them?
Anon
First of all — Your feelings are completely understandable and normal. I’m not here to tell you that the grass isn’t always greener, or other sayings like that. I think most people experience jealousy about stuff like this. I know I have.
Alrighty, now what can you do about it? If you want to, that is. I have had a lot of therapy, and this exact scenario is something I’ve worked on! (Not about makeup, etc., but jealousy over similar)
For me, I first sit with my feelings for a bit. I try not to judge myself or tell myself that jealousy is wrong or immoral or anything. Sometimes this is all I need and the feeling passes. When it doesn’t pass, I try to look at the feeling with curiosity and figure out why I’m feeling that way. Usually for me it ends up being something I want to change about myself but I haven’t been able to figure out how.
As an example, sometimes I’m jealous of my friends’ relationships with their mothers. I have thought about this, and I realize it’s because I never had a good relationship with my mother because she passed away when I was a kid. I’d never fully grieved that situation. So I used that insight to decide what I could do about my situation, if anything. In the above example, it meant setting aside time to remember my mother and to allow myself to have a “relationship” with her to the extent it was possible (looking at photos, talking to her if I wanted, etc). It really, genuinely helped! Sometimes I still feel jealous, but I can name what’s going on and deal with it.
I hope this helps! I have compassion for you and what you’re going through. These feelings can be distressing, but I think you can get through it better on the other side!
Green eyed monster
Thank you for this thoughtful. I appreciate it.
Sunshine
Thank you for posting this. I can see it applying in a completely different scenario to my own life.
Vicky Austin
Thank you for posting this. I can see it applying in a completely different scenario to my own life.
Anon2
Are you jealous of any woman who doesn’t care about these things or just your sister? Maybe these things are slowly starting to not be that important to you either.
Anonymous
As someone who moved from NYC to a small suburb of a smaller town, a lot of this is influenced by what’s around you. It’s like that old Tina Fey joke, you’re a 4 in NY but an 8 in Cleveland…
anon
This. I used to wear make up in NYC to any social gathering (not for day-to-day life) but I rarely do that in my suburb because many other people don’t either. It’s like you don’t get “dressed up” for anything just in town. When we left NYC I warned my husband I’d get less-hot once we left — I knew it was inevitable because it’s just easier to stay stylish and put together when everyone else is too and, for me, to revert to the mean elsewhere.
Anonymous
I think it’s normal to feel this way. Maybe it’s just because I grew up with acne that was tough to resolve until my 20s, but I’ve always been jealous of people who don’t feel the need to wear makeup. To me, it’s no different than being jealous of people who don’t have to deal with the hassle and costs of wearing contacts or glasses. Or who naturally can feel good on 4 hours of sleep while I’m over here in pain without 8. I don’t think it necessarily has to be anything deep about how you feel about her or yourself. It’s pretty expected your sister would bring out most of these feelings since you’re close and you have probably grown up comparing and contrasting each other at different points of aging across all these years.
Anon
I do think blonde hair is different (blondes have been getting highlights since BCE time).
I am a little jealous of my sisters who always have their hair and face done, and jealous of my sister with curly hair and also jealous of my sister with shiny straight hair instead of my perpetually in-between hair. So for me I have had to admit this is “grass is always greener” territory!
Anonymous
So originally I was going to say plus 1 to the Anon at 3:05 who said she is like your sister because it is takes too much time and money to do all of that stuff. And that is certainly part of it for me – I can’t be bothered to even blow dry my hair most of the time, I hate the way makeup feels on my skin, and I do not look perfectly put together. (I work at a creative field so have a lot of leeway). But if I’m honest, I think for me this isn’t necessarily a reflection of confidence in my looks. Rather, I think I decided a long time ago that I’m just not that great looking and will never win that battle, so I’d rather not compete. What confidence and self-esteem I have comes from my intelligence, sense of humor, and assorted other abilities and traits. I never got a lot of praise or attention for my looks, so if I’m losing them as I age, well, I have less to lose so it doesn’t bother me very much. I’m not saying this is true for all women who are not into makeup, dying hair, etc., just for me.
Anonymous
Also, I have lived in NYC for 20 years. I don’t agree that you have to look better here, at least if you don’t live in a super affluent area. The city has incredible diversity and a wide array of looks.
Anon
Thanks for posting this. I’m about to go spend time with my effortlessly thin sister! She’s like “I don’t know, sometimes I just forget to eat!” whereas I sometimes forget I have already eaten.
Anon
Could it be that you’re trying to get something out of makeup and hair dye that they aren’t delivering for you? Confidence, comfort in your own skin, any of those.
It’s interesting to note that your sister looks impeccable without being all dolled up. Maybe some of what would help is improving your wardrobe and getting a different hair style?
If it makes you feel any better, a lot of women are in your shoes. For some reason, women who are comfortable in their own skin can really irritate women who aren’t – I think the latter are so used to believing that it’s normal, it hurts to see a different way.
anon
The post above is prompting this– don’t have a trip in mind at this moment. i have had an american airlines visa for probably 20 years and have close to a a million miles. the reason they keep just growing is that I don’t even begin to know how to use them… whenever I have looked into a big international trip (even with first class) there are $1000 in taxes. I can’t see spending a $1000 a ticket to use miles. Am I missing something? is there some angle or suggestions? I
Anon
I’ll take your miles and pay $1,000 for a first class international flight!
anon
Same here!!
Anon
Same!
Anon
OMG same
OP if you don’t want to travel and don’t want your miles I am sure you would find plenty of people who would pay you to transfer them to their account. Yes, I know this is not technically allowed per American but they’d have to catch me. I’d be happy to take the miles off your hands! Post a burner and let’s talk!
Anon
Transfer fees are insane, and not worth the value of the miles. It costs $12.50 to transfer 1,000 miles on American, so $12,500 for a million miles. Not worth it. But I don’t think it’s prohibited by American if you’re willing to pay their exorbitant fees.
Anon
That’s odd. I booked business class tickets to Australia and it cost an insane amount of miles, but the taxes and fees were only $160 per person round trip. First class cost more miles, but I think the taxes and fees were the same.
But fwiw the cash price of the business class tickets was $14k, so even $1k would have been much less than the cash price.
Cat
Co-signed…
but also, if you never fly American, why have you been wasting your credit card points on miles you don’t use? Switch to a card with cash back, or one with points you can use on different carriers?
Anon
+1
Anon
For those of you who have gone camping (car camping) for a week, do you just wear the roughest clothes you can get away with or try to be civilized a bit? I want to keep cool, and be comfortable, but can’t figure out if what I need is my North Face Aphrodite shorts / free tee with words gear or Athleta and wicking polos and try to be a bit more put together? IDK why, but sometimes I feel so nasty when its hot and humid out what looking worse makes me feel worse. Clearly, I have run out of real problems in my life.
Anon
I’d do a mix of both. I totally get that sometimes you’re just going to feel better in certain clothes, even if they’re not the best ones for the job.
Anon
I think as long as what you choose is safety and weather appropriate, you should wear what you feel good in. Nothing says you have to wear old and used when camping if you have something you’d rather wear! Just be sure that in the unlikely event it rips or gets ruined (and I think it’s unlikely – you’ll just have to launder it!), you’d be ok with that. I think this goes double if you plan on taking pictures – why not feel and look the way you want to?
mouser.
One more reason I’m sometimes jealous of my sister! She’s totally “when I look good I feel good” and I’m “it’s the woods. There are no mirrors. Wear whatever appropriate for the use from TJX”.
Anon
I usually split the difference. I have a fair amount of workout and hiking gear that’s functional but not ugly and that’s what I wear.
I’m someone who immediately donates “free with words” shirts, so even my rattiest shirts are slightly nicer than that.
Anonymous
Agree with a mix. Some days I wear the rougher clothes for the hard parts of the day and change for the dinner and campfire part, much like I do on a weekend at home. But don’t feel obligated to spend a bunch of money. Nicer clothes can still be a cheap tee, just a clean and newer one that fits well.
Nesprin
If you’re uncomfortable, hiking/camping clothes can help somewhat but not completely. (I stay away from cotton since it’s the absolute worst at keeping warm/cold/UV off- natural fibers and tech fabrics really do work better). It’s worth going to REI.
Anonymous
I spend a lot of time outdoors and find I’m generally happy if my outdoorsy clothes fit well and are in colors I’d wear voluntarily. Also pretty much every photo of myself from the last several years seems to be taken while hiking, and I’d be bummed if all of those pictures were in clothes I didn’t like. So I vote for bringing some more polished clothes if they’ll be comfortable. If it’s relatively warm, I often bring a dress. It can feel cooler (more airflow) and it just feels good to change out of hiking clothes at the end of the day. I have a few from Patagonia and other outdoor brands that are made of fabrics that dry quickly and are pretty durable.
Indoor Grill or Toaster Oven
My airfryer was recalled and I have the choice to get the Cosori Aeroblaze Indoor Grill or their Toaster Oven as a replacement. I would use it primarily for steak, fish, and veggies. I have an outdoor grill. Any advice?
Anonymous
Our’s was part of that recall and we just got the replacement air fryer option that they swear doesn’t have the problem that led to the recall… This also means we now have a spare basket from the old air fryer so we have a spare basket.
Anonymous
What jeans are on trend right now?
Anon
Honestly, I’ve been wearing skinny jeans since before the Pandemic and never felt out of place.
Anonymous
Not sure if they’re on trend but I still really like the Perfect Vintage Jean in Bartlett Wash I got earlier this year from Madewell…
Sallyanne
Wide leg, flare, lighter wash for summer, no rips or holes but undone hems still around. Check out Mother and Paige brands
Anon
Also Frame
Anonymous
Can we have a “what are we getting for fathers day” thread? i have zero ideas for my poor dad. he has everything he wants!
Anon100
An Apple Watch for my dad (splitting the cost with my sibling), because it’s the only Apple gadget Dad doesn’t have yet.
Anon
I don’t normally get my dad anything for this reason. I just call him and wish him a happy day.
Sunshine
My dad is 70 and wants my time more than anything else. Fortunately, he and I enjoy spending time together and we often do ordinary stuff like run errands, work in the yard, go for a walk, get coffee, etc. My dad happens to think Father’s Day is a token holiday that he refuses to acknowledge. If he did, though, I would spend the day with him doing one of these things. Come to think of it, I probably will anyway and just not mention it’s Father’s Day. Clearly this doesn’t apply if you don’t live near your dad or have a fun relationship with him.
Anon
Then don’t get him a “thing”. He doesn’t need more things.
Give him a gift of time with you. A visit/dinner/outing he enjoys.
A digital picture frame with pictures of you/your family where you can remotely add more pictures as you do things in life, so he can see how things are going!
A coffee of the month 6 month membership.
An interesting chocolate gift set.
Some other sort of consumable he likes.
A gift certificate to buy theater tickets/concert ticket to a place he likes to go to.
A 23andMe DNA kit.
Anon
A card, where you handwrite a very thoughtful list of some of your favorite memories of him. Focus on the childhood ones.
Vicky Austin
Booze!
Whiskey for DH, wine for dad. Not sure about FIL – DH’s job.
Anon
Is anyone else a bit concerned about the indictment response? I absolutely believe Trump should be indicted, but the calls to action and/or violence from the right seem increasingly scary. It feels like all of the language and rhetoric is what you traditionally see before pretty terrible things happening. Also just the fact that half of the country doesn’t trust our Justice Department or other institutions can’t be good for their efficacy and legitimacy.
Anon
I won’t trust our institutions if he gets away with all the things he’s done.
If he doesn’t actually go to prison, I think we should be worried.
Anon
The difference is that you are unlikely to grab a gun and perform physical violence. I assume.
Sunshine
I don’t see how he does time in prison. The secret service couldn’t protect him in prison. I’d like to hear ideas about how that could happen though.
Anon
Couldn’t they? They would just put him in the lowest security prison, in some special “wing”, probably with his SS detail stationed right outside his room.
Anon
Haven’t his supporters been saying for years, despite evidence to the contrary, that solitary confinement is totally OK?
anon
Honestly, as long as he and his progeny (blood or otherwise) stay out of the White House and the MTG’s and Boeberts and DeSantis’ of the world go back under their bridges and to their caves, I’d see that as a winning outcome.
Anonymous
Whatever makes you think that will be the result? Do you think those people have either integrity or shame?
Anonymous
it’s absolutely going down a dark road…
anonshmanon
It will certainly be interesting. On the one hand, the local police departments should prepare for the worst. On the other hand, I am curious how DeSantis will strike a balance between preventing mayhem and appeasing the cult members. But potentially it will be a nothing burger like the NY arraignment, because there is a wide gulf between online crowing and actually going there and putting your neck on the line for Dear Leader.
Anon
What makes you think DeSantis wasn’t to prevent mayhem? Mayhem would give him an excuse to control more of life in Florida.
Anon
*wants* to prevent mayhem
anonshmanon
You’re not wrong! On the other hand, R voters love to exaggerate BLM riots as a failing of political leaders, that’s what I was thinking of.
Anon
I am also worried and I am especially worried that Trump will cut some kind of deal with DeSantis to throw his weight behind his campaign for a pardon in return.
Anon
This is actually not unlikely…. I could see it.
Anonymous
Trump will never agree to that. He’s too egotistic.
Anon
My local bar association is having a “brown bag lunch” at a courthouse tomorrow to hear local judges give a CLE. What does “brown bag lunch” in this context mean? Am I supposed to bring my own lunch?
Anonymous
Yes. You bring your own lunch; no food or beverages are provided.
Anon
Yes, it’s BYOL. They talk, you eat and listen, everyone chats for a few afterwards, and you all make it back to your desks by 1-1:30.
Anon
Yes, that’s literally what brown bag lunch means.
Anon
There’s no need to be rude to someone who doesn’t know something and is asking a question.
Weird earth
the screaming you hear is me.
after telling a colleague for the 473772 time that we need to do a task X way, as per regulations guidelines laws policies etc
why yes I did cry today but it’s a WFH day so it doesn’t count.
Anon
:( you must be so frustrated!
Anon
IRO – can anyone comment about quality, fit and style?
Anonymous
Gorgeous. I own one (obscenely expensive) jacket. I’m 5’7” and it hits at my waist (as it was designed to). I’m a pear and it fits me well. I think a woman with a less defined waist might give a different review. The jacket is a bit warmer than I expected, but suitable for truly Arctic AC. Keep in mind, this entire comment is based off one jacket, not a survey of the brand.