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Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. ICB is having a pretty killer online sample sale right now — lots of interesting pieces and lots of basics marked way, way down. How good of a sale, you ask? Well, let's take these simple stretch wool twill pants, available in black and gray — they were originally $345 but are now marked to $52 (final sale, mais oui). Whoa. Designer pieces that cost almost as little as ICB designer Prabal Gurung's Target collaboration? Sign me up. Stretch Wool Twill Pant Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com. (L-2)Sales of note for 9.16.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off sale
- J.Crew – 30% off wear-now styles
- J.Crew Factory – (ends 9/16 PM): 40% off everything + extra 70% off sale with code
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Extra 25% off all tops + markdowns
- Target – Car-seat trade-in event through 9/28 — bring in an old car seat to get a 20% discount on other baby/toddler stuff.
- White House Black Market – 40% off select styles
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And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
bobbi loblaw
Sorry for the immediate TJ – but, West Coast r3ttes, any suggestions for an alternative vacation spot for Yosemite in November? We’re taking our honeymoon in Napa in November and wanted to go to Yosemite but worry about needing chains for snow tires and getting up there. A friend suggested Big Sur, but it looks like there aren’t as many planned tours and activities there. Thanks.
Alice
What type of activities are you interested in? Are you looking for hotel/B&B/camping? Yosemite is beautiful with a bit of snow, but it is pretty far from Napa.
It seems you will have a car. I would second Big Sur–it’s gorgeous, and a great place to hike, spa, etc. It is 1 1/2 to 2 hours to Hearst Castle, which would be a great day trip, and less than an hour (I believe) from Monterey (fantastic aqarium).
Also in Southern California, Santa Barbara is a beautiful town. El Capitan State Park and El Refugio offer great beaches, and I think you can camp at El Capitan. There is a historic mission in town, shopping, good food, and if you aren’t tired of wine tasting…head a half hour or forty minutes away (search Santa Ynez Valley). You can also visit the beautiful Channel Islands off the coast by boat.
Keep in mind that to get to these places from Napa, you could head to the Bay Area and take Highway 1 down the coast–a breathtakingly beautiful drive at times. Though not for the weak of stomach.
If you are willing to spend more time getting there, Joshua Tree National Park in Southern California is beautiful in a really strange way. It’s close to Palm Springs.
Alice
*aquarium*
locomotive
There is a lot to do on the way down to Big Sur. You can stop in Monterey and see the aquarium and also cute little beaches, in Half Moon Bay (another cute little town with beaches), Carmel, and there are lots of bed and breakfasts and hiking/outdoors-y activities in the area.
TCFKAG
I loved Big Sur. Monterey and Carmel are SO cute (and have some amazing sea food restaurants and Carmel has one of the best cheese shops I’ve ever been to). It’s just a beautiful drive – especially the part through Pebble Beach. I would bet there’s tons of hiking (I didn’t have time for that in my itinerary). I don’t know, I feel like that would be a lovely addition. Plus you can see Redwoods – who doesn’t like redwoods?
But otherwise, I feel like other people will be more help in concrete alternative suggestions. But either way, have fun!
CA lawyer
What’s the name of the cheese shop?
TCFKAG
Ironically – its called the Cheese Shop in Carmel Plaza.
Jay
Big Sur is fantastic. And Carmel and Monterey. And down to San Simeon to see Hearst Castle!
bobbi loblaw
Thanks for the suggestions, everyone! There’s a lot more around there than I realized. We will have a car, which gives us a lot of options. We enjoy hiking and my fiance loves to fish – so I don’t know if he’ll be able to find that. And I’ll have to check out that cheese shop in Carmel, TCFKAG. I may never leave then.
Anonymous
This sounds so fabulous. I’m going to threadjack the threadjack – apologies. My hubs and I are not going to be able to take a babymoon for various reasons, so I’d love to do something like this after the baby is born during my maternity leave (I get a long one). Does that sound doable? What age would be best? I was thinking like 3 months old? It would be a very low key vacation.
JJ
I would think 3 months would be a better time to travel and vacation than with an older baby. At 3 months they’re a little more alert but still not mobile (which is key), and still sleeping a good bit. You’ll be in to whichever feeding routine that you choose and hopefully the baby will have a more set/predictable sleeping schedule. I loved having a 3 month-old and basically just brought him everywhere with me in his carrier.
As long as you’re planning low key (like, walking around Carmel, walking around the Monterrey aquarium, etc) and are ok with the baby sleeping in your same hotel room with you in either a pack n’ play or hotel-provided crib, it sounds like a lot of fun.
Meg Murry
There is a growth spurt that typically occurs around 12 weeks, so I would recommend slightly after that (3.5-4 months?). Small babies are pretty easy to travel with, as long as they aren’t the type who scream the entire time they are in car seats (which is rare, but happens).
I would plan a driving trip go you can go where you want when you want and take whatever you feel you need to make the trip work. Sounds like a fun & relaxing trip!
Corporate Cowgirl
3 months is a good time, 4 months is probably better. I flew across country with my almost 4 month old and 2 year old and it was great. No problems at that age, very easy. But, my 4 month old was sleeping through the night by then, so that helps.
Anon in NYC
A friend took her 1.5-2 month old on a road trip from PA to CO. She said it was pretty easy at that age.
Anon
I don’t want to scare you, but don’t plan something that can’t be cancelled/refunded. My little one hardly slept until after 6 months and would only sleep in what she considered to be ideal circumstances (never in a carseat, pack n play, etc.). I think she was a little bit of an anomaly, but just to be safe, make refundable plans. Congrats and have fun!
Diana Barry
Do you have time to take a long weekend before the baby comes? The absolute last thing I would have wanted to do during maternity leave was travel. If you do want to go, I would go somewhere where you drive so you can take as many breaks as you need.
NYC
I traveled with my 4 month old for 3 weeks and I think it was the perfect age. He still slept a lot and was great on the planes and road trips, I didn’t have to bring along food for him, and he didn’t require that many toys. We did sleep training when we got home, so I felt free to just do whatever it took to get him to sleep at night (usually ended up in bed with me in the early morning hours, so I could keep sleeping, which is something we avoided while at home). It was a marvelous trip — highly recommend taking advantage of that long mat. leave to visit people and places!
Amy H.
If you love cheese, try to visit the Sonoma side and San Francisco in addition to/instead of Napa . . . there are some wonderful dairies and cheese shops — and restaurants, of course! Off the top of my head:
Dry Creek Kitchen in Healdsburg serves all local Sonoma County cheeses — and wines (and Hotel Healdsburg is a fantastic honeymoon hotel)
Alas, Cyrus is no more. They had a phenomental cheese cart/cheese course.
Andante Dairy
Bellwether Farms (sheep’s-milk cheeses and yogurt — not set up for visits/tastings, though — they make San Andreas, Carmody and Crescenza along with others)
St. Benoit (I have to list them because I love them — but they make yogurt, not cheese — SO good though!)
Cowgirl Creamery and Milk Bar in the Ferry Building in San Francisco (they are also a local producer — they’re out on Point Reyes and make Mt. Tam and Red Hawk and multiple other cheeses)
Mission Cheese on Valencia St.
Say Cheese on Cole St.
Cheese Plus on Polk St.
Gary Danko (lovely, expensive restaurant with phenomenal cheese cart/course)
Cheese Board and Cheese Board Pizza in Berkeley
And far north, in Arcata, is Cypress Grove Chevre, which makes Humboldt Fog and Truffle Tremor. You can buy those cheeses at Cowgirl and Mission Cheese — perhaps Cheese Board too.
And if you like charcuterie to go with your cheese — two favorites:
Fatted Calf in Hayes Valley
Boccalone in the Ferry Building — this is the charcuterie place of Chef Chris Cosentino (Incanto)
Anonymous
A lot of these suggestions are fantastic (loved the Ferry Building and Cowgirl Creamery), but Gary Danko is a waste. Overpriced and honestly not that good. The cheese cart was good, but the rest of the food options leave a lot to be desired.
Joanna Toews
+1 to the Cheese Board in Berkeley. Oh my lord. I still dream about the pizza.
And then there’s Saul’s Deli across the street…
And the original Peet’s Coffee and Tea one block up the hill on Vine…
And, of course, Chez Panise…
TCFKAG
If you go to the Cheese Board in Berkeley – make sure to have the pizza of the day. It is to die for.
LH
I agree with others suggestions of Big Sur and Monterey/Carmel. Big Sur is more naturally beautiful, but there is more of a town/resort area in Carmel so you might want to stay in Carmel for a few days and make a day trip to Big Sur. If you visit Carmel, I recommend Carmel Belle for breakfast/brunch and Little Napoli for dinner. One thing to consider is that since you’ll be up in Napa, Lassen Volcanic National Park is closer than a lot of the national parks in central and southern california. It’s no Yosemite (which I consider to be in the top 5 national parks in the US) but it is very pretty. I’m not sure how accessible it would be in November though. Going south may be a better bet if you really want to do hiking.
Darby
how long will you be here? You can easily spend 4-5 days in Napa/Sonoma, just relaxing, wine tasting, going for bike rides, poking around the towns. I’d actually suggest going up to Mendocino if you want a mix of coastal/beach in there. I like Carmel/Big Sur, too, but I adore Mendocino in the fall. Lots of B&Bs, coastal, good food & wine. I think there’s fishing up there too (saw your later post on that) — at least a few friends of mine who are into that go to Mendocino to fish.
D
Yet another TJ, sorry hive but I just got this email and it is frustrating.
I left my last job in November. I was running a pretty big initiative and had to hand it off to someone less than competent. It is now April and I’m still getting emails like “how do I do this?” I now work somewhere else, doing similar stuff and really don’t feel like helping this person. How do I kindly tell her to figure it out on her own???
Neha
Say “I’m sorry, but I work for another company that the old project is no longer my responsibility.” If possible, direct them to other resources that would be of help to them. After you send that email, if you keep getting questions just delete the emails and don’t respond.
JessC
I think you just stop responding. It’s not “kind” and maybe even a little passive aggressive, but she’ll likely get the point eventually.
Is it possible that a supervisor is directing her to reach out to you with her questions?
Anonymous
Why does it have to be kindly? Just say “Sorry soandso, I am no longer available to answer questions about the initiative because of my new position.”
A
I like this one. It’s still polite but makes it clear you are no longer available.
Anonymous
I would just send an email (with an answer to her latest question, if you want to be nice) saying, “Unfortunately, I am working full time for another company and will not be able to spend any further time assisting Old Company with this project or answering questions. You could try contacting Mark Smith or John Jones, who were still employed there last time I heard from them. Best of luck.”
Ginjury
It’s been six months and you are no longer familiar with the project. Rather than stating it as “I don’t want to help you anymore” (which is perfectly acceptable), you could state it as “I’m no longer the best person to help you.”
I think Ask a Manager has responded to a question like this. I’ll see if I can find the link.
Ginjury
Here we go. It’s question 2. The comments are also useful.
http://www.askamanager.org/2013/02/short-answer-saturday-7-short-answers-to-7-short-questions-26.html
Anon in NYC
I would take this approach as well. I think telling someone that you don’t *want* to help them (even if it is true and a perfectly valid feeling) is just a little too rude for me. I would try to soften it by saying that you don’t think you’re the right person to answer these questions, especially since you’re so far removed from the project at this point, and refer them to your former co-workers or boss.
Anonymous
When a flight is cancelled, do they rebook you automatically? Just checked my glight status and it says cancelled but there is no info about when itll be rescheduled
espresso bean
In my experience, they do not rebook you automatically. I would try to meet with someone in person (if you’re at the airport already) or call to get rebooked. Good luck!
Ashley
I think it depends on the airline. I hope for your sake it is not American Airlines b/c they are terrible! I would recommend calling customer service to get to the bottom of it.
Anonymous
Its United. My flight is not til tonight but there is bad weather in Chicago. I am in a meeting but will call as soon as I can. Thanks!
Ashley
Oh no, good luck. I am in Chicago and it is pretty bad. They are actually closing schools b/c of the rain/flooding.
Kerrycontrary
Call ASAP. The other flights fill up fast with people who are already at the airport and their flights were earlier in the day. One time this happened to me (again, bad chicago weather) and I was already at the airport. I had to get really stern with the airline who was trying to delay my trip for 2 days (and this was 2 minutes after the flight was canceled, I was the first person in line). I ended up having to go home, fly out the next morning from a different airport in the region, and fly into a different airport within that state. But I really had to get where I was going. I hate flying for this reason, it seems to never go smoothly.
Apple
Call as soon as you can! You need to rebook yourself and it will be first call, first rebooked.
Brant
I fly United all the time. They do rebook me (I have elite status, not sure if that’s part of it), but it can sometimes be on a cr@ppy flight that doesn’t work for you. Call and tell them, they’ll work with you to get something that works. But keep watching the new flight(s) because they may get cancelled too.
Also make sure you haev the available flights open in front of you- you may see flights/connection options that don’t come up in the United rep’s screen. Sometime you have to tell them “yes, i can fly through X city and make my connection- dont you see it in your system?!”
a passion for fashion
“bad” weather is an understatement. The streets are flooded here.
anon
call now. I flew out of ORD last night & it was a MESS. united cancelled tons of flights & it was body to body in there. I’d also consider making a hotel reservation if you aren’t originally in Chicago – those were all booking up.
darjeeling
I have never tried this but I’ve heard that if you use twitter to contact them you will get rebooked faster- maybe you can do this on the sly in your meeting
Eleanor
If it’s Delta, you can get on their website and re-book yourself, which is much faster and easier than calling customer service. Even if you don’t do this they’ll eventually re-book you automatically, but it seems to be on days and flights that are not at all what I want.
Bonnie
Call the airline’s 800 number right away to rebook. You’ll be competing for available spaces with everyone else that was on your flight.
There are some interesting items in the ICB sale but I detest final sales, especially for online items you can’t try on.
AIMS
My experience is they rebook you but you may not want to be on the re-booked flight, so call the airline immediately.
Ashley
These pants are really cute but I hate buying items that are final sale in case they don’t fit!
Alice
I agree! I have two pairs in my basket and am deciding whether to go for it.
Does anyone know if these run small or large? I’m generally a two in BR, J. Crew, Ann Taylor, etc.–I’m short and have some hips, though. I’m considering buying 2s….
Naomi
I’d like to know this too–is the size chart accurate? If it is, I’d have to buy two sizes up from my normal size, which seems odd.
Frugal doc..
Me three! I love the look and this seems like an amazing deal, but you can never trust the sizing charts…
KC
Oh final sale items, the bane of an online shopper’s existence.
Though my bank account is a huge fan :)
NOLA
To follow up on my question yesterday about a graduation present for someone going to law school: I’m intrigued by the idea of Bluebook with the online subscription, but if I buy her a 3 year subscription and give it to her for graduation, would she activate it when she starts using it or would it run from this May through three years? I’d hate for it to expire before she is finished using it, although I guess theoretically, she would be graduating three years from May. Any advice would be appreciated.
Ellen
Trust me, no one use’s BLUE book once you leave law school. I did NOT even use it alot in law school, EXEPT for legal writing. I would get the person a box of chocoleate’s b/c they will NEED that to study for the BAR.
Today, I walked in to work b/c my dad is getteing very mad that I took 3 day’s off when I was with Myrna and Roberta last weekend and Monday. He is telleing me that I will NEVER get married with my TUCHUS, exept mabye to some guy with a gut as big as my tuchus, and then we could NEVER have BABIE’s b/c it would be physieceally impossibel for him to impregnate me. FOOEY, b/c I want a baby! I am NOT anxcious for some guy to be huffeing and puffeing away on top of me tho, like Alan did. He was realy a mess in bed, now that I look back on it. DOUBEL FOOEY on him. His new girlfreind know’s what I am talkeing about. Poor gal!
Anonymous
She will be finished by May don’t worry about it. I think this is a great gift idea. And am now contemplating having my bluebook custom bound in pink leather just for fun.
Anonymous
dont most law schools provide that for free?
Ms. Basil E. Frankweiler
No. And I never actually got anything “free” from my school, it always came from a company (Barbri, Lexis, etc.)
NewMama
Law schools provide nothing for free.
Anonymous
Well its not free obviously its in the tutition. But I never paid for lexis, bluebook online or westlaw.
mintberrycrunch
Mine does not. We have access to Lexis & Westlaw, but not the online Bluebook.
This is a great gift idea!
Boo
Not to be pessimistic, but maybe starting with a 1-year subscription is a better idea. Just in case.
NOLA
You know, I had the same thought, sadly. This young lady is probably first generation attending college and she’s very sure she wants to go to law school, but who knows. I asked a colleague yesterday where she’s going to school next year and they said she hadn’t decided because she was so afraid of making the wrong choice. So maybe the print book with one year of online.
JMDS
Obviously you don’t know where this person will end up working, but if he/she ends up in BigLaw the firm will buy you a bluebook as a summer associate, and then when you start again. If you want to do this, I would go with the 1 year subscription.
NOLA
Right – Not having gone to law school myself, I’m relying completely on you ladies for help. I know money will be tight for her, which is why I was considering the 3 year. But now I can see that the one year is probably a better choice.
don't want to rain on parade, but...
Not all schools use the Bluebook first year. I’m from a T-50-100 that uses ALWD for first year (hello, kickbacks!), then switches to Bluebook for 2L (which you then only use if you are on a journal). She also might not be litigation focused- Bluebook isn’t really used in transactional classes. I’d suggest not getting Black’s either, unless the giftee likes print books, because Westlaw has it online for free with her student login.
NOLA
Interesting. Well, maybe I should revert to Plan A. I was just trying to tailor her gift to something helpful for law school.
ML
NOLA-
As an alternative idea, the place I worked at before law school gave me a going away party and some really sweet gifts. A couple of them were from my law school book store that they had ordered online (different part of the country). I got a law school hoodie, a cap, and a tee shirt. I loved that sweatshirt (and the hat) and wore both to death. I still have the hoodie and its my favorite sweatshirt. I was really touched that they went to the trouble of ordering it from across the country for me. I also got some other nice things like really cute pens, pencils/note pads, etc. I also received a huge, hard back Blacks law dictionary that was nice, but I actually never touched. It was so heavy and like someone mentioned, Blacks is available online free for most law students.
So maybe a sweatshirt or something similar? Just an idea.
rosie
I like this idea. I got a college sweatshirt as a gift from family when I got accepted early decision, and I still have it and love it 10+ years later. I would do a hoodie from the school (once she decides) and an Amazon gift card. Textbooks can be cheaper on Amazon, and she can also get study books there–or fun books and movies if she needs a break.
NOLA
Yeah, unfortunately, as I mentioned somewhere in this thread, she’s been accepted at three law schools and still hasn’t decided where she’s going. She’s a smart kid but I’m guessing doesn’t have a lot of family support for making these decisions.
Anonymous
This is definitely the exception rather than the rule, though. I would say 98% of law schools use the Blue Book first year.
Ashley
I second this. I went to Northwestern and we did not use bluebooks 1L year for legal writing.
JessC
Ha – you must have gone to my school! They 100% taught ALWD at my school. I also agree about no getting her a hard copy of Black’s – she’ll likely have a westlaw subscription provided by the school that she can use to look up definitions in Black’s.
I liked some of the suggestions from yesterday – office supplies (stickies, pens, and highlighters, a USB, and starbucks gift cards.
Blonde Lawyer
I also went to an ALWD law school.
Jill
Same. We used ALWD for legal writing but Bluebook on LR.
AnonAZ
Yep, we also used ALWD for first year (T-50 school), and then bluebook for publications 2L and 3L year. Also, I got all excited and bought a Blacks the first week of law school and have literally never opened it. Ever. It looks pretty on the bookshelf in my office now that I’m practicing, but it was not useful in lawschool at all. FWIW.
You are very kind putting so much thought into these gifts, NOLA. These students are lucky to have you as a mentor and friend.
anon 2L
Half our profs use bluebook 1st year, half use ALWD.
Generally, the ones who have/do practice in addition to teaching use bluebook, because that’s the accepted citation method in court. The ones who only teach use ALWD. It’s actually kind of a ‘fight’ at my school right now, because the BB profs are arguing that given how hard it already is to get a job, they aren’t doing any favors by teaching us a citation method/manual that nobody in the ‘real world’ uses. It’ll be interesting to see how it shakes out.
At work , we use our state appellate court’s “style manual”, and bluebook for whatever isn’t covered in there. No one even knows what ALWD is outside school.
R in Boston
In my experience, only litigators use bluebooks. I have not touched mine since sometime halfway through my third year of law school, and didn’t bother with the updated versions every year during school. A few people got me books when I went to law school and I have never cracked one of them. Get her a gift geared toward the career (nice leather portfolio, card case with a monogram, etc), not toward law school. Then she will be able to use it for longer and it will be transferable to a different career if she doesn’t end up a litigator.
If you do want to get a book, I would go with Strunk and White over all else.
NOLA
I asked this question yesterday and didn’t get a response. If I get her a card case, does it need to be conservative? I had bought a couple of Lodis card cases but one of them is coral. Would that work or should I get something different? Black with red lining?
Jules
I think a nice, colored card case would be fine. It’s tiny and will only be out and visible to interviewers, say, for a few seconds. Also — as someone pointed out here recently — it’s okay to have some personality even if you’re a law student or lawyer. I’m senior/established, so I’ve obviously gor more leeway, but my favorite card case has a vaguely Indian/South Asian flower design in enamel with tiny little sparkling stones. (It’s somehow all encased in clear enamal or plastic so it’s smooth and the stones won’t fall off. I know I’m not explaining it very well.) I like seeing this pretty little thing when I pull it out to give out a card. My briefcases, on the other hand, are fairly boring black.
I also second the idea for practical gifts like coffee cups, starbucks gift cards, highlighters, etc. I never did buy Black’s; she can always get one at the library, and looking at bluebook before starting law school would be dispiriting, IMO.
Scully
I don’t think it needs to be super conservative. A bright coral case is easier to find in a black bag.
Other than that, a gift card to the store where they sell textbooks would be really helpful. Or maybe a set of E&E or Nutshell guides. Those textbooks really add up the first semester!
Or maybe promise to take her shopping for her first suit and help kick in for the cost? If she’s not from a white-collar family, it can be hard to judge what to buy. Someone did this for me, and I’ll always remember it.
NOLA
Great! Thanks. Now I’m thinking the coral case with a bunch of school supplies (highlighters, flags, etc.)
I don’t know if she’ll still be around for the rest and she hasn’t picked a school yet.
Ella
Just wanted to chime in that I think this is a great idea! I think 1 year would be great because of the possibilities listed here but also that after the first year, she might get a subscription from someone else, like a journal or an employer.
Bonnie
I still use my Bluebook but am a litigator. It looks like there is not much benefit to buying only one year of online access since it’s $32 for one year or $50 for three years. A Black’s Law Dictionary is a nice gift but I rarely used mine and wish I had never bought it. I think a nice gift would be a basket of necessities: a spill proof coffee mug, a nice water bottle, highlighters, post-its and flags. These are things that are not expensive individually but definitely add up quickly.
AnonAZ
The one thing I consistently used during law school was gift cards to my favorite coffee shop. Around finals, we would literally be there from open to close. Since you don’t know where she’s going, maybe a starbucks card, since they’re pretty much everywhere. Assuming she likes coffee/tea, I guess.
Awful Lawful
When I got accepted into law school, a family member gave me a leather portfolio from Coach. I’m not sure what your budget it is, but I loved the gift. It’s not something that I use all the time, but I love taking it to interviews as it gives me a bit of added confidence. Plus, I can put my phone, cards, and keys in it and then I can avoid bringing a purse to interviews.
NOLA
Can you post a link to something like what you have? I’m curious. Honestly, I don’t know what my budget is. This young lady has worked for us for all four years and she is the best friend of one of my colleagues so I’d like to do something nice.
Veronique
My former job gave me something similar to this (http://www.amazon.com/Portfolios-Top-Grain-Zip-Around-Portfolio-Chocolate/dp/B001EY1OQK/ref=sr_1_4?s=office-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1366378091&sr=1-4&keywords=leather+portfolio+with+zipper) when I left to go to law school. Like Awful Lawful, I used it for all of my law school interviews and it gave me an extra boost of confidence (and somewhere to put my cards/lipstick). You can find them at a variety of price points, so don’t think you have to spend $175.
Ideal Characteristics:
-Black (I used my brown portfolio, but black would be better)
-Zipper (better for storing stuff inside)
-Notepad
-Slot/folder for storing resumes
-Business card section
-Zippered section/slot for business cards you receive
-Preferably leather (unless she has objections
NOLA
Thanks! I was wondering about the type where you would be able to add keys, etc. This is helpful.
The Slapdash Sewist
If you want to get her a book, I actually used my portable-sized law dictionary a TON my first year. I had been given the huge, beautiful hardbound Black’s for winning an award in undergrad, but never cracked it. The little dictionary I carried around with me every day my entire first year. The number of times I looked up “assumpsit,” I cannot tell you.
For someone who is coming from an environment where she wouldn’t have been exposed to this specialized vocabulary, it was a godsend. (I felt like the only person in law school whose parents weren’t lawyers–I had never even met a lawyer.)
very nice
I really want this houndstooth cutaway coat: http://www.icbnyc.com/shop/smoke-multi-wool-houndstooth-cutaway-jacket
Would anyone care to enable me (or tell me that I would look ridiculous)?
TheoSTL
I really like the houndstooth, and I really like the silhouette, but it’s a little too much together for me. On the other hand, I really wish that this jacket was available in my size.
http://www.icbnyc.com/shop/midnight-asymmetric-zip-wool-melton-jacket
very nice
I see what you mean. I just ordered the black one instead! Now I can’t wait for fall! Heh. I love that zippered one also.
Awful Lawful
I think that jacket is gorgeous and I would totally get it if I were you. I love the silhouette and I think it’s something you could wear with pants, a sleek black pencil skirt or over a sheath dress. I say go for it, especially at that price!
Calibrachoa
*enables all over you*
Equity's Darling
To the posters who told me I should watch Doctor Who -you are terrible people. Because of your recommendations, all my evenings for the forseeable future will be spent watching Doctor Who, isntead of doing anything productive, but, I’ll forgive you this time, because obviously the series is amazing.
Has there been a consensus on this board re: shorts rompers for weekend wear? I recognize that they’re kind of ridiculous, but…I’m ashamed to say the look has grown on me. I’m envisioning a black sort of flowy shorts romper with espadrilles.
I would also consider a jean-romper to be worn with cowbow boots, but only because Stampede is a time to wear all things ridiculous, and I feel if the jean-romper was less than $50 it would be well worth it for that 10 day time period. I recently bought my rodeo tickets, so “fashionable” rodeo wear is on my mind.
cbackson
1) Please wear jeans romper with cowboy boots
2) Please post pictures
THAT IS ALL.
Anonymous
Umm isn’t a jean romper just overalls?
Equity's Darling
No, I think overalls have to have that little button and hook thing. My jean rompers would have no button/hook thing, and would likely have short sleeves.
I’m envisioning something more like this: (though I don’t love the elastic at the waist, and I think a slightly deeper colour denim because that shade would wash me out, or possibly even a dark wash…?)
http://www.shopbop.com/all-one-denim-romper-ag/vp/v=1/845524441931694.htm?folderID=2534374302034081&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&colorId=22262
TCFKAG
Agreed. Pictures or it didn’t happen.
cbackson
I’m making a commitment right now: If Equity’s Darling does this, I will myself go find a jeans romper and take a picture of myself wearing it with cowboy boots. MY HAND TO GOD.
Equity's Darling
Welll, Stampede isn’t till July, but I will keep this offer in mind cbackson, because I may actually do it.
Really, what I should do is start a tumblr for just those 10 days where I document outfits, and you’d see that my suggestion is actually quite reasonable, considering the other things people wear.
Cb
Yay! So glad you’re loving Doctor Who.
J
I am all about rompers, and 100% support the denim romper + cowboy boots idea. I’m not a huge fan of the one you linked, but I’ve seen a couple tighter ones with sweetheart necklines that are really really cute. One caveat though – you must make your hair as big as possible to pull it off. You are going to a rodeo after all.
No Problem
I have a question for all of you ladies who run: will running make my rear end get bigger?
I’ve always had a curvy backside. I consider it one of my greatest assets (haha). However, I’ve gained some weight in the last few years and most of it has gone straight to my butt. I’ve gone up several sizes and am frankly pretty tired of having to constantly buy new pants and dresses.
I also just registered for a half marathon this fall. I’m just starting to get going on training and hope to be up to around 15 miles a week by next month, maintaining that until I start actually training for the distance at the end of the summer. I also know that the muscles in your butt are used quite a lot in running, and undoubtedly will get stronger as I put on the miles. So for the ladies who run, have you experienced a change in the size of your butt because of running? Ideally I’d love it to get a bit smaller so I can fit back into the pants that used to fit last summer, but I don’t know if the running itself is just going to make that impossible.
Kerrycontrary
Running, or any cardio, and a diet change should make you lose weight overall. So you will lose weight in your butt if that’s where you hold it. Plus toning your muscles makes them tighter and leaner…so your measurements should go down. I wouldn’t avoid running just for fear of muscle size. Focus on the health aspect of things.
rosie
I agree that you should focus on the health aspect. However, I definitely liked the tightness I had in that area when I was running 20+ miles a week and doing regular core work.
No Problem
I’m definitely focused on the health aspect (hence all the running). Just wondering whether I should bite the bullet and buy new summer pants or cross my fingers that 2 months of running will tighten me up enough that the pants that are too snug but wearable will be more comfortable.
Anon in NYC
You could also face a situation where your shape will just change. A friend just told me that doing consistent Bikram yoga changed her rear so that it’s tighter, but also provided lift in a way that she didn’t expect, so even though she’s leaner she can’t fit into her former pencil skirts.
Anonymous
When you first begin running, keep in mind that there might be a temporary situation where your muscles will retain some extra water and you will feel all weirdly “bloated” and like it’s not working as it should. Do not worry! This always passes and you will be in a much better shape (heh, minus the extra water retained by muscles, I meant) in a few weeks’ time. Just a friendly FYI from a running enthusiast. :)
SunnyD
I have not experienced a change in butt size as a result of running. I do find running makes me pretty hungry and if I don’t watch what I eat, my butt will grow. But that growth is fat, not muscle. Boo!
TBK
+1 I never noticed *running* making my butt bigger. Post long-run Saturday brunch, however…
anon
unless you do sprints, then no. long-distance running actually makes it hard to hold on to muscle.
Cornellian
or hills. Which, honestly, if you’re running a marathon, you should probably practice a bit depending on which race you’re running.
De
I used to do about 20 miles a week, and have always had the flattest of assets (I make up for it in other areas!) However, I got a huge case of the sads and didn’t run for like, a year. It was gross. I recently got into a new work out routine for the last four months, which most of the classes do squats, leg work, etc. All of a sudden I’ve got a toosh. It’s amazing. I’ve never had one and so am quite excited. But, I only just started actually running again a few weeks ago.
So based on my experience, I think this shows that being a runner does not add to your current fixed assets, unless you do additional asset-enhancing exercises such as squats.
cbackson
I gotta be the voice of dissent here, but running definitely enlarged my trafficstopper. In a shapely way, but I definitely pack much back, as they say, when I’m running high mileage.
No Problem
+1 for trafficstopper!
frugal doc..
No, it probably will not get bigger and in fact will likely get smaller and more toned/tight.
I also have a bit of junk in my trunk that seems to work for me, and when I started doing cardio and lost some weight I lost quite a bit from my butt. I’m actually a little annoyed, as now my pants all have saggy butts. Of course, my thighs are the same..
Sally
I read two interesting blog posts yesterday about what running will do to your butt/body that you might find helpful:
This one suggests that regular intense cardio, like long distance running, can actually make your body hold on to fat: http://www.dangerouslyhardcore.com/5343/why-women-should-not-run/
This one says that running on a treadmill specifically will make your butt smaller, because of the different way your muscles are engaged: http://www.xojane.com/healthy/the-treadmill-ate-my-ass-or-how-to-avoid-treadmill-ass-syndrome
I think it largely depends on what kind of large your butt is. If it’s muscle, you’re best off running on a treadmill to get rid of it (but if it’s muscle, my vote is buy new pants and learn to love what you earned). If it’s fat, pretty much any exercise that leads to fat loss will get rid of it, as long as you’re not building butt muscle at the same time (squats, sprints, etc). But honestly, my vote either way is to buy new pants and embrace your booty.
Anon
Apparently I need to spend more time on the treadmill.
a.
I’m halfway through the Why Women Should Not Run article and I’m already seeing red. The author is coming from a different background than I do, and probably speaking to a specific audience, but jaysus. The only reason to exercise is not to turn yourself into a hard-bodied fitness model.
Jill
I’m an avid runner (lots of marathons, 1/2s, other races and maintain like 20-30 miles a week) and I have absolutely no butt. I love, love, love running and it’s helped me maintain my weight through lots of life changes and a very sedentary job.
Praxidike
Sorry, but running is unlikely to make your butt smaller. Weight lifting and a good diet, combined with some running, will probably do the trick. But you’re going for overall fat loss rather than just loss in the butt. It is pretty much impossible to do “spot toning”, even though people misuse the term constantly.
Anonymous
For point of reference, have been running relatively regularly since 18 (29 now), and running high mileage in the past 3-4 years. (I LOVE running!)
I never saw any change in my butt that I could attribute to the running until I significantly increased my mileage and kept going. After that, it has gotten “better shaped” but most definitely not bigger. I think that running hills and a lot of speedwork *could* have a small butt-reducing effect.
ICB Stretch Twill Legging Pant?
Am I crazy for considering? Is this OK? Is a legging pant different from legging-as-pants? I’m imagining wearing next winter on weekends, with boots….
Lola
Hi all – I just got the Aussie 3 minute miracle on the recommendations of the lovely ladies of this site. Question for you all – do you use this daily? Weekly? Once in a blue moon? I can already tell a difference from one use but just curious going forward. Thanks for the rec!!
momentsofabsurdity
I use it weekly (sometimes twice a week in the winter). Basically, I use it again when my hair stops feeling as soft/smooth as the last time I used it, which usually takes about a week. I don’t wash my hair every day though, more like every couple of days.
mintberrycrunch
I actually use it in place of a regular conditioner whenever I wash my hair (every 2-3 days). But my hair is very thick and long, so it stands up to a fair amount of conditioner, and I actually like that it weighs my hair down a bit, so ymmv.
big dipper
I do this as well. I wash my hair 3X/week and use this conditioner afterwards. My hair is medium thickness, I just make sure to adequately rinse my hair.
KC
I don’t use it too often in the summer (maybe once every other week if I’ve been swimming/out in the sun a lot). In the winter, when my hair feels drier/more static I tend to use it about twice a week. I also wash my hair daily, so if you wash less, once a week would probably be plenty.
Clerky
Thanks again for all of the great comments yesterday regarding my question about losing weight after having a baby. I agree that diet plays a big role, and while I generally eat pretty healthy, I have some vices (read: chocolate) that I should cut!
So on the subject of diet….I’m currently BF’ing and read that you should consume an extra 500 calories a day to maintain supply. Did you all actually do this, or can you maintain supply eating a bit less? Ultimately I care about the healthy of my baby and obviously don’t want to impact supply, but I am curious what you ladies have experienced. I haven’t been tracking what I eat, but I essentially eat what I ate pre-pregnancy plus some healthy snacks.
Thanks!
Diana Barry
Don’t count!!! I definitely eat a TON while nursing, esp when baby was small. I was constantly hungry and also thirsty all the time. I would eat to your hunger – drink a glass of water before eating if you are worried you might be thirsty instead – but don’t count what you’re eating. Anecdata, but every one of my friends who tried to cut down on food also lost supply.
LackingLuster
If you start cutting calories while you are nursing, you will not only be hungry, but you will be tired too. And hunger + tired = lower milk production and worrying about that, plus things that don’t need to be worried about (like laundry, the dishes, etc.) and freaking out on your husband for weird little stuff, and then not being able to sleep, and then everything will be bad. Ask me how I know. So trust me, if you are hungry, have a snack. This is not everyone’s experience, but once I hit about 4 months into nursing, the weight literally started falling off. I had lost everything by six months and kept losing until I got pregnant again and quit nursing the first one. Wait and see how your body reacts.
Divaliscious11
You need the calories, but keep in mind 500 calories is not a huge amount of extra food. a plain large bagel is about 400…..
TBK
I don’t have a baby, but jeesh, worrying about cutting calories when you’re producing food to feed a rapidly growing human, after just growing that human inside your body, and after having pushed that human through a fairly small opening resulting (most likely) in tissue damage that needed to heal — I’m thinking your body needs FOOD! If you still have an extra 15lbs in a year, maybe that’s something to think about. But not 10 weeks post partum.
Anonymous
This. Calm down. Have some extra lady garden parties if you want to up the calorie burn.
Anon for this
Laughing because BF’ing can sap your drive for lady garden parties in a big way. At 10 weeks pp that was at the very bottom of my list.
Meg Murry
Basically, you should eat if you are hungry. Choosing healthy snacks instead of junk food/empty calories is good, but yes, you need approximately 300-600 extra calories beyond your normal daily caloric requirements to maintain your milk supply. If your baby is gaining weight fine and you eat when you are hungry, drink when you are thirsty you should be fine. Its more of a concern if you suddenly drop off your caloric intake or suddenly increase your exercise than if you adjust gradually.
This web site is a good source of evidenced-based bf info written by lactation consultants, nurses and doctors:
http://kellymom.com/nutrition/mothers-diet/mom-calories-fluids/
http://kellymom.com/nutrition/mothers-diet/mom-weightloss/
Brant
Eat, just make healthy choices. Have toast instead of a bagel. Have salad for lunch. Fruit/cheese/yogurt/granola as snacks, not chips etc.
You do need to keep up your intake, and you WILL be hungry. Just don’t fill up on junk.
anon
I am currently pregnant and had gastric bypass 5 years ago, so my OB sent me to a dietitian and I am so glad. I feel much better about my diet and I have a better idea of what I need, versus what “they” say I need. Ask your ob for a recommendation.
JJ
For what it’s worth, I was hungrier BF’ing than when I was pregnant. I also had to drink water almost constantly or else I felt like I was dying of thirst. On days when I couldn’t get around to eating as much, I noticed a supply drop. I think the best choice is to just make sure that you’re eating to your hunger, but making those calories count. So, instead of ice cream for that extra 500 calories, eat an apple with peanut butter, veggies with hummus, etc.
Anonymous
I would definitely not count calories this soon after birth. Your milk supply is still regulating and if you don’t take in enough calories now your supply could drop.
Anon
I just read your post from yesterday and I agree with everyone who says it’s only been 10 weeks! My understanding is that at the 10 week mark, some of the weight is still going to be extra blood, water retention, etc. That stuff will just take time to process, regardless of how much working out you do.
I also just read a great book called Does This Pregnancy Make Me Look Fat, which I’d highly recommend it to anyone who is struggling with the emotional side of pregnancy body issues.
Anonymous
It is really, really depressing to me that there is this much pressure to have lost all the baby weight after just 10 weeks. Thanks celebs and all the magazines showing how they got their pre-baby body back in “just 4 weeks!”, or whatever.
Pam
Agreed. It’s just crazy.
Clerky
Thanks all. I will just continue to listen to my body and eat when I need to. I should have also mentioned that I had a c-section, and 10 weeks later, it still hurts to do anything ab related. But as everyone says, the weight will come off in time.
Re: the pressure to be back to normal — it’s just not celebs unfortunately. At my new mom’s class, one of the moms was bragging about how she was back to her regular weight as soon as she LEFT THE HOSPITAL. The rest of us wanted to strangle her. :)
Anonymous
So, you’re still recovering from major surgery and taking care of a 10-week old baby? Seriously, give yourself a break for a little longer, I can’t believe you’re this stressed about 15 lbs, given the circumstances.
Nonny
Truer words were never spoken.
Please, cut yourself some slack.
JJ
The rule to me is 9 months on, 9 months (or a year…) off. Your body is still healing from surgery. The goal at 10 weeks is survival, not weight loss.
just Karen
“The goal at 10 weeks is survival, not weight loss.” THIS. Thank you JJ!
Jules
No, you should NOT be worried about this, just take care of yourself and the baby. (And along the lines of the new mom bragging: Not long after I had my son but when I was back at work I was dealing with an a-hole opposing counsel who more or less gratuitously told me his wife had left the hospital in her pre-baby, teeny-size jeans. Yeah, thanks for sharing that. I did get some revenge by winning against him in a jury trial within the year.)
Jamie
Hi everyone, I have a job search question. I’m applying for a job at a legal nonprofit and I need to submit a legal writing sample. I’ve been out of law school and practicing for two years at a civil legal aid organization. What do you guys think about using a a seminar paper from my 3L year? The subject of the seminar paper is definitely of interest to this potential employer, it’s a good fit. It’s 23 pages total, but I could edit it (not sure if I should, no guidance given on length and recommendations seem to vary widely as far as page numbers for writing sample).
My concern is: will it be weird to use a law school paper when I’ve been out for awhile instead of “real world” work? I don’t write memos at my current position, the only writing I’ve done has been letters and standardized pleadings, nothing that requires any real argument skills (and nothing that contains much original work, we have a form bank). I’m just not sure what else to use for a legal writing sample. Thoughts??
rosie
I use law school papers as writing samples, and I’m almost 3 years out. I clerked, so cannot use any writing from that as a writing sample, and since clerking I’ve been in a job where I don’t do a lot of writing, and the little that I do would be really difficult to redact to a point that I could share it. I think it’s fine to use a law school paper as long as it is still an example of your best work and you are comfortable discussing the topic.
I typically aim for 10-15 pages with writing samples that do not specify a length, but I am curious to hear what others say.
Batgirl
I work in the legal department of a non-profit, and (absent instructions to do otherwise) I would send both. I think it’ll be clear why you’re including the law school one and not sending something more technical or recent could make it look like you haven’t had any recent experience drafting. If forced to give one, give whatever matches the type of writing you would expect to do at the job (i.e. if you’d be writing briefs/memos, send one of those, even if the subject matter is completely irrelevant to the job). Good luck!
TBK
I typically send a cover page with any writing sample I use. The cover page includes the same header as my resume (name, address, contact info) and a brief (2-3 sentence) statement on what the sample is and why I chose it. Using a cover page would allow you to explain that, while you have been working for a few years, you felt this paper from law school would best demonstrate your ability to perform the kind of work that would be required by this job. I would edit it down to 10-15 pages, though.
Jamie
(Sorry if this is a double post, my comment didn’t post on my first attempt)
Hi everyone, I have a job search question. I’m applying for a job at a legal nonprofit and I need to submit a legal writing sample. I’ve been out of law school and practicing for two years at a civil legal aid organization. What do you guys think about using a 7-page excerpt from a seminar paper from my 3L year? It’s 23 pages but I can edit it (not sure if I should, no guidance given as to length and recommendations seem to vary widely re: page length for writing samples). The subject of the seminar paper is definitely of interest to this potential employer, it’s a good fit.
My concern is: will it be weird to use a law school paper when I’ve been out for awhile instead of “real world” work? I don’t write memos at my current position, the only writing I’ve done has been letters and standardized pleadings, nothing that requires any real argument skills (and nothing that contains much original work, we have a form bank). I”m just not sure what else to use for a legal writing sample. Thoughts??
roses
What kind of work would you be doing at the legal nonprofit? If it’s policy-related, I think it’s fine to use your 3L paper. But if it’s direct representation, I think you are much better off using a pleading that you’ve done at your current job. Or do you have time to write a memo about a legal issue that may have come up in your current position?
Blazer Help
Any ideas for a camel/stone color blazer I can wear in the spring? I need to wear blazers/jackets to work but I only have black and navy. Looking for something that works in the summer.
Mountain Girl
I ordered a skirt from Banana Republic earlier this week in a “washed stone”. I don’t know if there was a jacket in that color and I haven’t rec’d the order yet so I don’t know if I would even recommend it but you might check there.
AIMS
I am considering ordering this linen blazer from Zara for the summer.
http://tinyurl.com/c5522e7
consulting?
For ANP: my email is oh [dot] hello [dot] caro [at] gmail.
To hellskitchen, the firm I’m keen on actually only works with nonprofits, but I guess I’m interested in consulting in general. Is that ever something that people break into, or do you have to get a degree in it?
ANP
I’ll write shortly!
hellskitchen
I was looking into that a few years ago and I was told that unless you are very senior or some kind of a niche expert (have a doctorate or something) or have prior consulting experience, the only way to break into management consulting was right out of college or grad school. Many of my nonprofit friends went into consulting for a couple of years after b-school. I am sure there are exceptions and the rules may be slightly different if the firm does only nonprofit consulting as I am sure they need domain experts in education, public health etc. but I found it hard to break into a straight up consulting firm, coming from a nonprofit background. ANP may have more info as it seems she’s worked in consulting
L
I am sick as a dog and have to be in the office (no I’m not contagious). Is it bad that I literally didn’t do a thing other than shower this morning? I figure if I’m going to say I’m sick and still have to come in, I might as well look the part.
Mountain Girl
As long as you are fully clothed than I would mark this one in the win column.
anon
Baby name opinions: what do you think of the name Stella Jane? Do you see a lawyer or doctor with that name? I keep thinking diva, but our last name starts with St and I love the alliteration. Other than my name, Stella is the only St name I like.
roses
Oh goodness, please please reconsider your love of alliteration, particularly with St…what if your child has a lisp??? A friend of mine has a rhyming name and it kind of sounds ridiculous (she freely admits it’s the only reason she’s thinking of changing her name when she marries), and I’m thinking an alliterated name also might sound silly.
TBK
Yeah, not sure I’m sold on alliteration. (Stella Stephenson? Stella Stanger? Stella Stavros? Not sure what your last name is, but none of these does it for me.) Personally, I’m not a fan of the name Stella. It makes me think of either an old aunt with a northeast accent and a smoker’s voice, or Brando yelling “STE-E-E-LLAH!!!” But that’s just a very personal reaction. I’m sure everyone has their images (positive and negative) for every name out there.
Niktaw
TBK, I was about to post that I liked the Stella Jane combo, but you yelled STEELLLAAAH and ruined it for me!
Anonymous
I am from Boston and have an old aunt Stella, so your image is spot on!
TBK
I’m from Boston, too. I don’t have an Aunt Stella myself, but I feel like I know a lot of “Aunt Stellas”.
ABC
Granted it is not an ST alliteration, but I have an alliterative name and I have always liked it. To each their own….
Woods-comma-Elle
I now go by my middle name, but as a child I used the end of my first name (it’s a combo) which made my name alliterative. I never minded the alliteration, it was pretty cool (RR) though I have never been too fond of my first name. I changed the name I use when I moved to the UK because my middle name is more user-friendly for English speakers. On that basis, if your child didn’t like Stella, she could always go by Jane.
Brant
or by Ella, which is pretty common. But I’m in the Brando camp when I hear the name: STELLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
SunnyD
My first and last names both start with ‘S’ and love it! Like you, my last name starts with “St.” However, my first name does not. Think Sunny Stamos. I’d never considered having both names start with “St,” but now that you mention it, I don’t think I’d like it as much. My vote is to pick another name that starts with “S,” but not “St.”
And, since you asked, I don’t like the name Stella, but I think it’s a generational thing. I think of Stella as being someone my grandmother’s age. Then again, some very old names are coming back so maybe Stella is one of them.
And congratulations on your baby!
Ashley
I love the name Stella. Not a huge fan of Jane, but if it’s a middle name no one will really see it that much anyways. :)
Are we doing this now?
Baby names, really?
SunnyD
Trends in baby names is something I think is really interesting and something I follow. I liked OP’s post.
Brant
I think it’s fair game- OP asked in the context of if was a “professional” name. We’re professional ladies. Some of us probably have name we feel are less than professional adn have to make do.
Speaking of- for those with long first names that go by nicknames with friends, do you go by your nickname at work? Eg. are you Margaret or Maggie at work (if you’re Maggie at home)? Katherine or Kate? Elizabeth or Liz?
I have a long name, and I NEVER use it. I go by the nickname at work, which got a whole lot easier when I got IT to change my email to Nickname.Lastname in addition to FullName.Lastname.
Em
I use the nickname at work (not “Em” – that’s purely an alias). I know NGDGTCO says to use the full name – but, to be honest, I work with plenty of men who also always use a nickname. I don’t think it’s a decisive factor in coming off as professional. I also think it’s difficult to have people in one part of your life call you one thing and another part another thing; to much awkwardness when worlds inevitably collide.
I, too, have both nickname.lastname and fullname.lastname as working e-mail addresses (I use fullname.lastname as the default, and that shows up when I e-mail people); I also had IT add a common misspelling of my name as an alias which solved all sorts of problems.
Equity's Darling
I could have sworn I read an article somewhere (I tried to find it…no success), showing that men are more likely to use nicknames at work because it makes them “more relatable”, and women are more likely to use full names because it conveys more authority, and at work, men are generally seeking to be more relatable, and women are generally seeking to project more authority…or something like that?
I generally use my full name regardless, to be honest, though it’s only two syllables, and I’m fine with the short form. I wonder whether I’d act differently if I went by the short form.
January
I have a long first name (let’s say it’s Catherine) and have always preferred it to the nickname (let’s say Kate). So I try to go by my full name at work and in my personal life — but I do find that people often start calling me “Kate” whether I ask them to or not, which gets annoying. I’ve actually had more success going by “Catherine” at work. I’m not really worried about conveying authority or whatever – if I liked “Kate” better, I would use it — but I happen to like my full name. I do *not* like it when people tell me that I need to go by Kate because Catherine is too formal. Who asked you?
Anon
On that note – I am actively TTC. Most of the baby message boards out there scare me. Has anyone come across a message board for pregnant professional women or professionals TTC?
big dipper
I have a long name and exclusively go by my nickname. I correct everyone I meet immediately if they use my full name, and where ever I work I always request my email/everything be set up with my nickname. I also use my nick name on my resume.
I barely respond to my formal name, and my formal name has like 5 potential nicknames so being clear up front avoids confusion.
Some of my friends have advised me to go by my formal name (my nickname ends in an “ee” sound) because they say my nickname is “not grown up enough.” But, my nickname IS my name in my mind. I don’t even consider it a nickname. So I definitely fall in your camp.
On the flip side, my brother has the opposite problem. He has always gone exclusively by his formal name (think William) rather than any of it’s many nicknames (Will, Bill, Billy, Liam, etc). He is really firm about people calling him by his given name, and not some nickname of their choice.
I think the point someone made below is interesting. I think my brother and I probably have so much trouble getting people to call us the right thing at work because of the point made below. People expect women to use their formal names to convey more authority, so I meet resistance trying to go by my nickname. And people expect men to utilize nicknames to convey that they’re relatable, which makes people constantly call my brother by the possible nicknames for his name.
Really, the rule should just be you call people whatever the name is they introduce themselves as. I think it’s inappropriate to shorten someone’s name (or call them by their more formal name) after they introduce themselves by a certain name.
Meg Murry
To Anon @ 1:53 –
I haven’t come across any professional women message boards. Kat, I think you could make a great sister site or message board out of c*por-Moms (hint hint hint)
But for baby name geeks, try babynamewizard dot com (and the book), swistle dot com / babynames, and bigbadbabynames dot net
@January – I have a short name that is a legit standalone name and one of my co-workers used to *lengthen* it, because she thought it suited me (like calling someone named John Jonathon, even though his name was just John). I didn’t really mind because she was my friend and the longer name was an ok name in its own right, but it did confuse some of our coworkers sometimes that I responded to this other name
PollyD
Yep, barren spinster here and I find baby naming sort of fascinating, too.
KLG
Having moved from a major metropolitan area to a rural one, I am FASCINATED by what popular names/spellings are in different areas now.
FWIW, I like Stella Jane and don’t mind the alliteration. Whether it’s diva or professional will depend a lot on your daughter’s personality.
NonnyNoo
Naming is interesting from a sociological perspective, too.
I guess OP is part of that hipstery trend where the old-lady names are being recycled for babies:
Eunice, Stella, Agnes, Beatrice, Dorothea, Florence, etc.
Stella Jane seems fine to me, if you don’t mind being tagged with being part of this trend. Some people would mind, because they don’t like being told that their name is not the product of some amazing organic internal imagination, but a confluence of social Zeitgeist.
Anon
Anecdata – my future MIL, who is a doctor, is named Stella.
NYNY
Stella Jane is the name of my favorite niece, who is almost 3. It’s a lovely combo, and Stella is traditional but unusual.
anon
This disappoints me. As if lawyers and doctors the only successful professions.
anon
should read “lawyers and doctors are”
Lady Harriet
I think it was just an example. If the OP went through doctor, lawyer, CPA, nuclear physicist, theologian, school superintendent, state legislator, etc. the list would get unwieldy pretty quickly.
NonnyNoo
I don’t think OP was trying to imply that those two professions are “successful.” My money is on the OP trying to politely ask, “please tell me if this name sounds like a p%rnstar name.”
K-K
I have an alliterative name and I hated it…until I thought about going by my (old school) middle name instead (moving to other side of country…all new people…perfect opportunity). I asked a lot of people and most actually loved the alliteration. I came around to their way of thinking in time and now it sounds so powerful when I introduce myself. So if you like it, go for it.
Jane? Is that in reference to The Blue Castle (aka my favorite book)? That was going to be my daughter’s middle name!
AIMS
I have a friend who thinks all her success in life (and she is very successful) can be traced back to having an alliterative last name with a corresponding number of letters in each (think: Samantha Stephens).
SJ
Please tell me you opted for Valancy as your daughter’s middle name instead?
K-K
Naw. Jane is Valancy’s middle name. Her mother chose it to “tame” the name that Valancy’s father, to her mother’s unending horror, chose and died shortly thereafter.
Yep, I’ve read that book waaaay too much. And why hasn’t it been turned into a movie yet?
K-K
Sorry, I was wrong. From Project Gutenburg:
Her full name was Valancy Jane. Valancy Jane was rather terrible, but she liked Valancy, with its odd, out-land tang. It was always a wonder to Valancy that the Stirlings had allowed her to be so christened. She had been told that her maternal grandfather, old Amos Wansbarra, had chosen the name for her. Her father had tacked on the Jane by way of civilising it…
OP
Jane is because of Jane Eyre first. It’s my favorite all time novel and I’d love her to be just Luke s modern Jane. And because lots of wonderful women have had that name, particularly Jane Goodall.
AIMS
Ok, I will play.
I read your “last name starts with St.” not as Stavros or Stanger, but as St. James or St. Vincent. In which case Stella St. X, sounds a bit like a fake p*rn star name to me. If that’s not the case, I obviously take that back.
Now, moving on to the name Stella itself, I actually just had this conversation with my SO and his response was, “if you name your kid Stella, you’ve gotta really hope she turns out to be good looking otherwise it will be awkward…” Not sure what that means exactly, but passing on the male perspective.
Anyway, name your kid whatever makes you have. And on alliteration, I’m all for it, though maybe sticking to first initials only.
cfm
Agree! I immediately thought stripper name. But Stella Stamos sounds nice.
Monday
WRT what Mr. AIMS said, I have heard the same thing from guys! If you have a somehow innocent or retro or non-s3xy name, it’s a huge plus if you’re good-looking but just sad if you’re not.
I like the name Stella and have noticed a lot of old-style first names coming back, so I say I like it. Didn’t have any s3x industry associations with the combo with St. _____ either, but maybe I’m too naive or something.
ML
Lorrie Moore has a good short story on this topic- the woman’s name is Agnes and she is very plain. Her older sister was beautiful and had a beautiful name to match, so her mother thought it would make her second child more intriguing if she was beautiful but had a retro/homely name. Didn’t quite work out that way.
More on topic- I don’t think of Stella in the same category as Agnes. Stella is old fashioned, but a pretty name, I think. I know a 6 year old named Stella and I think it’s a darling name for her.
Cb
I love the name Stella, I think its perfect for a little girl as well as an adult. I might add this to my future fat little babies list (entirely in my head, don’t worry, I don’t have a google doc).
Anon in NYC
Oh, I totally have a google doc. As well as a list of “do not use” names.
NonnyNoo
Can you share some of the “Do Not Use” names?
Comic book
It may sound a little comic book, but I like it. I met a Peggy Powers once, and thought she sounded like a superhero. She also kicked butt at her job.
OP
Lots of great points here to think about! Thanks, everyone. I knew I could count on you. To he honest, I think stripper, too, although I don’t know why. Our last name is one syllable, which seems to make a difference. And to Anon looking for a baby message board, I’ve looked at babycenter, babyzone, and babybump. Love the videos, articles, and general info, but hate the communities. Too many, um, how to say this? Very young moms to be. And to many rants about personal drama.
Mirrie
Anyone else see the Modern Family episode where Cameron does the Brando STELLLLLAAAAA while looking for the dog named Stella, and then squees later that he got to walk around the neighborhood and “yell ‘Stella!’ like in Streetcar!”? I found this particularly hilarious because I also used to have a dog named Stella and did the same thing…
but to the OP’s original question: I kind of hate alliterative names to the point that avoiding them was one of my baby-naming criteria. But to each her own. There are much worse names out there now-a-days! I don’t think anyone would really think twice about Stella St___.
AnonAZ
I just picture Stella from HIMYM, who was a dermatologist :)
Nice Cube
So, i just started calorie counting and whoa, they add up fast! i have always had a healthy diet (vegetarian, very little processed stuff) but i had no idea how many calories i was consuming. i have been using my fitbit app to track what i consume, but it is kind of clumsy. have people had luck with syncing fitbit with myfitnesspal?
Nonnyette
I religiously use MyFitnessPal but don’t use Fitbit. My recommendation is to post on the MFP forum – I am sure there are tons of people there who use Fitbit and can help you.
Nonny
…and now you all know that my MFP name was based on my Ette name. Oh well, friend me!
RosieAims
I have my fitbit synced to MFP and really like how it works. I was already accustomed to using MFP when I got the fitbit, so it made sense for me to do it this way, but I think the database of food and the interface of MFP is better than fitbit’s food logging. Also, if you’re tracking your water intake, MFP allows you to track however many ounces you like, while fitbit’s “goal” is so low that I usually meet it by lunch. It is important to ONLY enter food/water intake on the MFP site — otherwise it will be entered twice.
Anonymous
Make up people, please help!
Will be in a wedding shortly. Lots of pictures. Among Make Up For Ever’s HD Invisible Cover and Mat Velvet, which will work better? Priorities are: no ghostface in photos, make me look dewy (not oily – I do have moist skin to start with), and be longwearing (no touch-ups needed, and ideally without primer).
HD seems to leave lots of people oily, but a lot of people seem to get very pale (if not ghostly) using Mat Velvet.
Would I get the best of both worlds by having oily skin and using Mat Velvet without primer?
Merabella
I think the most important thing for make up in pictures is to use something that doesn’t have SPF – that is what causes ghost face.
I haven’t personally had experience with either of those foundations… You should check out gossmakeupartist on YouTube, he has a lot of great reviews of foundations, he really loves Make Up Forever, but he goes into the hows and whys of why one is better than the other.
Anonymous
Thanks, I’ll check! Neither have SPF, but I haven’t been impressed with the Mat Velvet pics I’ve seen, and I’ve seen several warnings about HD with oily skin. I will check that guy out.
Gail the Goldfish
I’m wearing Mat Velvet today from a sephora sample I just got, and so far it seems awesome (I have super oily skin). Not sure how it works in pictures. I would just get samples of both from Sephora if you have one nearby and try them out and see which works best.
Gail the Goldfish
also, for events where I really need makeup to last, like weddings and parties, I use Urban Decay’s All Nighter makeup setting spray. They also have one called De-Slick Setting spray that’s for oily complexions, but I honestly can’t tell any difference between the two and the All Nighter seems to help makeup last a little better.
Lily-Student
UK ladies – Banana Republic are having 25% off until midnight, with code HAPPYHOUR =D
TBK
I know I keep posting these from Capitol Hill Style, but they’re all topics I want to discuss with you ladies. What do you think of this?
http://caphillstyle.com/capitol/2013/04/17/chs-careerist-lessons-learned-part-iii.html#more-36389
I used to believe this was right, but in biglaw, I never saw it work that way. I worked with one senior associate who was never at fault for anything. If something went wrong, she’d go to the partner and say “[junior associate or paralegal] screwed this up. Here’s what went wrong, and here’s how I’m going to fix it [insert martyr-like remedy].” So, yes, she brought the problem to the partner’s attention without him having to find out about it for himself, and, yes, she had a solution, but she never took ownership. She never said “I was the one who gave junior associate the instructions. It looks like I wasn’t clear enough. Going forward, I will be sure to [proactive rememdy].” I saw lots of other people doing this, too, and it always seemed to work for them.
I had always taken the tack of saying “This error happened on my team. Here was the reason it happened [explanation without naming names] and here is how it will be resolved, and here is how I’ll be sure the same mistake doesn’t happen again. I was responsible because I was in charge. I’m sorry and I’ll do what has to be done to make this right.” That never went well for me. What was remembered was that *I* had screwed up, not that I had taken responsibility for my team or stepped up to fix it. That always really bothered me. I thought that it was very poor form for a sixth-year to blame a second-year or a paralegal for a mistake, just as it would be poor form for the partner to tell the client that “Joe Associate screwed up” instead of taking the blame for her own case team.
What have other’s experiences been in this situation?
Diana Barry
TBK, I saw 100% the same thing when I was in biglaw. The people who got ahead were always the people whose sh*t didn’t stink…the people who would waste time not working but hanging out in the hallway complaining about how much work they had, or the people who had the martyr attitude.
TBK
OMG, yes on hanging out in the hallway complaining! Or the “no one on my team is as good as I am so I have to do all their work for them” attitude. Grrr.
SFBayA
Everything that I do and what is done by the people below me is on me. Period. So in a case with a partner, a senior, me, and some juniors, if I f up or a junior associate f’s up, as far as the partner is concerned, it’s on the senior associate, because the senior is the next tier below the partner. And as far as the client is concerned, the partner owns any mistake as her own, because ultimately its HER failure to supervise properly. As far as the senior’s concerned, it’s on me and it’s on him. Accountability is everything. Even when the person below you is an idiot, it’s still on you because you should have supervised better, explained better.
However, I do name names (I mean, it’s not hard to figure out which part went wrong and therefore which associate was likely responsible for that part) but I own the problem – Junior did not do a good job on X because he [missed a case; blew a deadline, etc.]. I should have explained better/supervised more/checked in more often/provided more guidance/been more approachable for questions. Here are our options for fixing the problem, A, B, and C. I think our best course is B. What would you like us to do?
Facts is facts. The junior screwed up. The mid screwed up by not supervising the junior enough or well enough. The buck for what you do and what is below you stops with you. But the partner and the senior associate also need to know what the skills gaps are for the people below them so that they don’t get blindsided by an associate making the same mistake in another case. Ultimately, the buck stops with the partner, so the partner needs to know what she needs to do better to supervise and train everyone below her.
cbackson
This is the approach that I take as well. In the end, the partner needs to be aware of how everyone on the team is performing.
anon
Happy to see this being discussed. I too found the post really interesting, but wondered if owning up to a mistake without explaining yourself at all wasn’t really the smartest route. My work experience hasn’t really involved many people freaking out at me over mistakes, so I haven’t had to deal with this much, but I’m sure it’s a common issue in other industries.
NonnyNoo
BigLaw = Investment Banking in this regard.
The tack that Belle recommends all depends on whether you have an aware, enlightened boss. Very few such bosses in investment banking.
Bonnie
Polka dot lovers: NM midday dash has an adorable work-appropriate navy polka dot dress by David Meister marked down to $98: http://www.neimanmarcus.com/p/David-Meister-Cutout-Back-Dotted-Dress-Midday-Dash/prod155830087_cat21000740_cat8900735_/?isEditorial=false&index=28&cmCat=cat000000cat8900735cat21000740
SFBayA
I see a lot of St. John in that dash, which reminds me of a question I’ve been pondering… why is St. John’s SO EXPENSIVE?? Is it really that awesome?
Merabella
I don’t know if it is awesome, but it was always something my grandma wore, and I immediately associate it with older ladies.
TBK
My understanding is that St John has a lot of structured knit items (even before the advent of ponte) and that these were especially figure-forgiving, which has made them popular with ladies of a certain age (and income).
NonnyNoo
Same here. I don’t need to pay those high prices to look old — I’m already old, so I like to think I get that “looking old” perk for free. :-)
LawyrChk
Gorgeous. So sad it sold out before I got there :-(
Deb
Advice for lunches to bring to the office that are healthy, high protein, but good for someone extremely unmotivated to pack lunches? I’ll do lean cuisines, but even they get old. I’m cursed with so many lunch spots near my office but need to lose 20 pounds in 5 months and should save some money too…
Meg Murry
What are you eating for dinners? Can you make an extra portion and pack it for lunch? Is there a grocery store near your office? Or somewhere with a salad bar? I’ll sometimes go to our nearby grocery at lunchtime on Monday and buy lunch food for a couple days or a week – that way I don’t have to worry about it at home, I’m set for a couple of days. When I do that I tend to buy things like a bag of baby carrots, a container of hummus, some fruit, yogurt & string cheese. Or I’ll go to the salad bar and fill one container with the dry ingredients like spinach, carrots, broccoli etc and another (smaller) with chicken, chickpeas, cheese, sesame seeds – then I’ll make up salads at my desk for a couple of days. By not putting the “wet” ingredients on the veggies it keeps better for the 2nd or 3rd day.
goldribbons
Cook large dinners, package them into complete meals in tupperware. In the morning, you’re ready to just grab & go!
Alice
Summer favorites include salad with cheese component: arugula/beets/chevre; feta/tomato/cucuber; mozzarella/tomato/basil. Supplement with nuts or yogurt or a hard-boiled egg for more protein.
I also like these lunches, which involve stuff (usually leftovers from curry or burrito night) thrown in a bowl. I use roughly chopped steamed cauliflower in lieu of rice: black bean/pico de gallo/plain greek yogurt/avocado/grilled chicken/cauliflower; or veggie and tofu curry over cauliflower.
I also tend to throw random things together in a bento box, usually with one type of meat protein + egg protein. Bento boxes with different compartments are fabulous for this. It means you can throw together remnants in your fridge to make a whole lunch, even if you don’t have enough of one thing for a whole lunch. See http://www.justbento.com for recipes. I spend one day every couple months preparing freezable squash, freezable Japanese-style meat slices, freezable tofu nuggets (they taste better than they sound). You can use the frozen stuff as a base, and build it by added random bits from the fridge (e.g., the 3 pieces of broccoli left over from dinner, the 10 grapes left in the bag, the three tablespoons of hummus left in the container).
My favorite bento: squash/egg/another protein/piece of fruit/cherry tomatoes or sliced pepper or other veggie/rice.
I also like making a frittata (with 8 or 9 eggs or egg white equivalent), cooling it, slicing it, and wrapping individual slices in plastic wrap to freeze. Defrost in the fridge (or microwave), eat with yogurt/fruit/salad. Simply recipes has a recipe I love with sundried tomatoes, chevre, onions, basil. If I’m going healthy, I limit cheese to a tiny bit of parmesan and go heavy on spinach.
frugal doc..
I make my lunch the day before and it is a mix of high protein/healthy things that I just throw in a box. A small amount of each, and/or more of a favorite.
Make a bunch of hard boiled eggs once a week. Take 1 or 2 each day.
Cheese.
Edemame
Nuts
and a few mini carrots, cherry tomatos, grapes, possibly an apple.
Sometimes a few wheat-thins if I am splurging.
It looks wonderful (healthy colors!), is very healthy and filling (enough protein/fat to be filling) and all of my co-workers look at me with awe/guilt.
J
Pack all your lunches in advance. Every Sunday, I make 5 portions of everything and put it in a dedicated plastic storage container in my fridge. In the morning, I just grab one of each bag/package or tupperware container and throw it in my bag. I put the tupperware and cutlery in the dishwasher when I get home. I try and mix things up every week so I don’t go crazy – eating the same snack and lunch for 5 days does get a little monotonous. I try to have one “entree” type dish, 2 big baggies of vegetables, a baggie of nuts, some fruit, and maybe some turkey salami. Celery and sugar snap peas are really great and hearty enough to last all week without issue. This saves so much money and has the additional bonus of allowing me to exercise great portion control, especially with nuts.
Anonymous
1. Make a large batch of a grain (bulgur, couscous, barley, buckwheat, etc., even polenta), quinoa, or rice. Portion it into individual servings and place on the bottom of the container you are using for your lunch. This will take you a very short time and you can use it for several days – time saved!
2. Chop and saute a glorious variety of vegetables in olive oil/butter/whatever and some nice herbs. This, which you can also make in a larger batch, goes on top of the grain in your lunch container.
3. This you vary daily. Place yogurt or sour cream or cheese (chevre or ever hard cheeses) or avocado or nuts or eggs or [your choice] on top of the grains and vegetables.
Voila! This is a healthy lunch with an easy preparation that allows you enough variation to suit your mood and keep things interesting. Add fruit and you’re done!
Anonymous
I forgot to add: add meat if that’s your thing, since you mentioned “a lot of protein” in your OP. But I think that the best bet for being full is to add a whole lot of vegetables to the mix! (Not a vegetarian, just don’t like meat too much.)
lawfriend
partner track question. My cousin’s wife, who I don’t know well but have enjoyed getting to know recently, works in biglaw. She graduated law school ’06 and is a senior associate (she’s been at the same firm). Is it rude/thoughtless/appropriate for me to ask her if she’s on the partner track? If yes- at what point does it become “up or out”? She’s starting to have kids, and I’m curious if she’s looking to stay and make partner, stick around, or just leave biglaw all together. She’s totally open and friendly, I just want to know if I’m asking something stupid before I stick my foot in it.
Susie
Inappropriate in my opinion, doesn’t sound like you know her close to well enough to ask this.
lawfriend
Thanks- I didn’t know if was just one of those things like, if you’ve been at a firm for a certain number of years, you’re gunning for partner so it wouldn’t be weird to ask…. Or, if it’s not really talked about until you’re close/have made partner already.
I am CERTAINLY not going to say ‘hey so now that you have babies, are you going to take off your shoes and hang around barefoot in the kitchen?” :)
Cat
eh, I’d put this question in a “personal” level similar to asking if you’re planning to have kids soon. As a 7th year associate, she likely isn’t quite eligible yet at many firms, but getting close. Partnership in Biglaw is something that is partially out of your control and she may be hearing “well, we don’t think you’ll be up for partner next year, but if you wait a few there might be an opening because so and so is retiring,” or there might be a younger associate coming behind her that’s being groomed and she’s worried she’ll be passed over, or maybe she’s not showing signs of developing a book of business and wouldn’t be approached at all, OR maybe she’s thinking about trying to move in-house but doesn’t want to tell anyone. So… no. :)
OP
Yeah, we’re personal in the way I’d be fine asking her if she’s planning to have kids soon. She asks me all the time. I just didn’t know if it was more of a general-interest-in-job question (which is my intent) vs a “so are you angling for a raise at work this year?” one… We talk about work a lot, she’s always interested in my/DH’s careers etc. My biggest concern is that I’d be asking about partner just as she’s potentially NOT qualified- but sounds like that’s not the case. I’ll tread lightly anyway.
Anonymous
Totally weird. Imagine if someone asked who you didn’t know asked you if you were trying to get a raise at your work?
Diana Barry
Nope, don’t ask.
Ashley
I am a mid level associate, and I think to an extent, this question is fine! If you’re talking to someone on a social, personal level I think it’s totally normal to ask them questions about their job. I mean obviously not how much money they’re making but you could just act interested in her job and ask if she wants to make partner someday. Nothing wrong with that! I wouldn’t go into details by asking, oh are you going to be up or out…..but otherwise I think the question is fine!
Susie
Interview dress anecdote – just saw someone come in for in interview. This is for an in house business practices type position at a (very) large tech company. The girl (mid 20s I’d guess) was wearing a black and white print dress, unbuttoned black blazer, black nylons and black pumps, long hair worn down. And my first thought was, she does not look like she’s dressed for an interview, guess she didn’t want to make it too obvious at her current job but she should have changed in the restroom or something.
Nellie
Maybe this a “you had to be there” situation, but I didn’t get the impression that this was particularly inappropriate / unprofessional outfit/ hair. I mean, nylons and professional shoes, blazer… must just be the dress? I thought no one wore suits outside law, finance, and consulting!
Anonymous
This sounds like a perfectly fine interview outfit. Aren’t tech companies known for being less stuffy?
cc
Sounds fine to me, honestly. I always wear a suit because I am usually interviewing for government lawyer jobs, but what she wore sounds great for an in house interview, as long as it wasn’t too short/tight
hellskitchen
That seems perfectly fine for a tech company unless the dress print was too loud
Susie
It’s similar to what I would wear here so not inappropriate for work, but I would certainly step it up a notch for an interview. Maybe I’m an old fuddy-duddy (at 31) but I say no black stockings. Also the dress, it’s kind of a modified bubble type dress. And not such a large, graphic black and white print. Tech company corporate is still a little different/more conservative than engineering. I mean, maybe if our boss wore a hoodie… but it’s not that company.
hellskitchen
Your last line made me laugh out loud :-)
I agree that the bubble dress seems wrong for an interview. However, I know people here say no to black stockings but as a woman of color, I have not been able to find nude for me stockings – all the ones I have tried look just wrong on me. I would much rather wear sheer black stockings than wear nude stockings. This may not have been the case for the woman you saw today. I think one of effects of an increasingly multicultural workforce is that dressing rules start to change to accommodate a wider range of body types, skin color and such.
momentsofabsurdity
+1,000,000 believe me – “nude stockings” look absurd on my brown legs. I haven’t found many that work.
This outfit sounds completely appropriate to me in a non suit industry. In fact, in my experience, sometimes interviewees in suits get unconsciously penalized for that in the tech industry (even in business positions), at least in the Valley, since they come off a bit fuddy duddy.
But yeah, not so sure about a bubble hem to an interview. Mostly because its one of the most universally unflattering styles I’ve seen. Everything else seems perfectly fine to me, if perhaps more noticeable than a basic gray suit, nude hose and heels.
Meg Murry
I would agree that the bubble dress and graphic print doesn’t seem quite right (I’m picturing something like Zooey Deschanel in New Girl – too “cute”), but is it possible she’s interviewing for a slightly more “creative” position like graphic design? It seems “creative” jobs are always listed as the “exception” to the conservative suit rules I’ve seen posted.
Kris
I’m confused by “no black stockings”? I can see tights reading as too casual, but what on earth is wrong with black nylons/ hose? They’re not a young or modern thing, they’re as classic as nude hose…I don’t get how a “fuddy-duddy” could have a problem with that.
Seems like you are really trying hard to disapprove of this woman.
Susie
I guess I’ve just never been comfortable wearing black nylons myself – this is definitely not a nude-for-her, or for me. Maybe I’m wrong but it doesn’t read as professional to me. I am not a part of the interview process so just noting my observation. But on the whole I do disapprove of a lot of my colleagues’ apparel choices so maybe she would fit right in.
Anonymous
Just so you know but you are certainly in the minority there. Black stockings are very professional.
Ashley
I agree with you on the black stockings actually. I would prefer “nude for you” pantyhose. The reason is b/c older generations may view black stockings as se#ier than regular pantyhose, and you never want to rub someone the wrong way. That said, I don’t think it’s THAT terrible if you wear black hose. But with her having long hair that she wears down – is that so bad? I ask b/c I have long hair and have always worn it down in interviews….
hellskitchen
I agree with you on the black stockings actually. I would prefer “nude for you” pantyhose. The reason is b/c older generations may view black stockings as se#ier than regular pantyhose, and you never want to rub someone the wrong way. That said, I don’t think it’s THAT terrible if you wear black hose. But with her having long hair that she wears down – is that so bad? I ask b/c I have long hair and have always worn it down in interviews….
Ashley
Hellskitchen, I totally get it. I am actually a woman of color as well, although my skin tone is such that I can find really tan pantyhose and it looks fine. I think if your skin tone was darker and you wore black stockings, it wouldn’t have the same effect as a lighter skinned person wearing black stockings b/c it would be less of a contrast and thus less noticeable. I get where you are coming from though. :)
hellskitchen
Thanks for clarifying – I was wondering why anyone would think black stockings look s*xier but I wasn’t thinking about the contrast of black with lighter skin. Thanks :-)
Susie
And now the male candidate is here, looking sharp in a full suit. But I guess there is less option for the guys, not much “middle ground.”
TBK
This is why I would never consider anything other than a suit for an interview. But then, I’m a lawyer who works in finance. I still think the safest bet is to take your cue from the men. Their clothes exist on a straight line from sweats through jeans-and-a-tee to full suit to white tie. Our clothes have various branches (e.g., my husband would wear his navy suit, white dress shirt, and maroon striped tie to a job interview, a funeral, church on Sunday, and an evening wedding — I would look strange if I didn’t wear completely different outfits to each of those). I think women often do themselves a disservice by using our relative sartorial “freedom” when there’s no upside to looking interesting.
BD
TJ: Has anyone tried the Avaleigh brand on Gilt? I see some cute pieces but I’m always wary of buying a brand I haven’t had a chance to see and touch.
Sherry
The iPhone 5 works iwth with 4G LTE networks worldwide, it
will help support HSPA+, DC-HDSPA, in addition to indeed, LTE.
ItAc€â„cs there are nick, single stereo, active antenna.
To help you to get content, flow video, as well as browse the website at amazing gears thereAc€â„cs now 13, 000 chip with regard to voice
and data, as well as a single broadcast chip. It has been rumored that the iPhone 5 various has more RANDOM
ACCESS MEMORY too, compared to 512MB within the 4S.
Clients can have acquire, upload more rapidly. The view of free games is a great choice.
It is having brand new devices such as AT&T. Often the LTE uses cheaper latency and easily it will increase the installing.
Potent A6 chip:
Often the dual core program on chip just some sort of A6 chip that is
certainly dealing with tremendous velocity.
In new iphone 4 5 the visuals performance increased fast with applying A6 micro cpu.
Searching closely with the A6 nick reveals a Samsung item number K3PE7E700F-XGCAccording on the statement, often the K3P tells us weAc€â„cre investigating a new dual-channel LPDDR2 deal with 32-bit programs.
It can improvise the rate and performance. The actual E7E7 gives us all the density of with the
two LITTLE die (512MB each die, 1GB total). AnandTech converted the markings on the A6 nick shown both
with the iPhone your five announcements basically AppleAc€â„cs latest page.
The end two figures in the part number give us the routine time/data rate, which in
such a case is actually 1066MHz.
Maps providers:
Apple is think of a fresh mapping assistance.
Its updated regarding old variation, actually old version is created
by Search engines. The apple company itself built maps services and now we can buy
improved productivity. About the advantages, the fresh Apple-powered
Maps app includes many features that were not inside the old model, like used turn-by-turn directions and also Flyover, an element that indicates
3-D models of buildings with major metropolitan areas.
Breakthrough Internet on the web connectivity, wider projection
screens, desktop-class internet browser and rich HTML email is usually other guarantee using iPhone 5C.
These smart phones additionally come with TELEVISION SET out facility as a way to enable users to view their wonderful memories on large TV display screen.
They can be better selection for music enthusiasts, because the phones get supreme audio end result clearness.
Due to the fact acquiring a fresh iPhone 5 various smart phone is not going to come inexpensive, protecting your own investment with the
right i phone 5 cases is just reasonable. According to your taste and
desires, a variety of protective cellphone cases are for sale to the apple iphone The method that you want your current phone
to search, and just how you would like to make use of it
may also dictate the sort of new iphone 4 5
case which will be great for you. Following are just some of the higher products for
iPhone 5 protection that are available this current year.
i phone 5S is motorized by the new Apple company A7 system-on-chip,
which the company claimed was the initial 64-bit processor ever before used on the
smartphone, using the pre-installed iOS seven operating system and its pre-loaded software
being optimized intended for 64-bit method, promising improved
performance. Effectiveness may be negligible at release devoid of the developers modernizing their applications.
Often the A7 processor will be manufactured by Korean, which is along with a
brand-new M7 “motion co-processor”, an infatuated processor regarding processing motion
information from its accelerometer in addition to gyroscopes
without the need of a persons vision from the main brand, which blends with
having iOS 7’s fresh CoreMotion APIs. M7 movement coprocessor will assist you to strengthen battery life regarding iPhone 5S keeping
away motion related task through main PROCESSOR.
This specific iphone 5 will be there together with the Aluminium housing as with the
successor clearly there was the challenge of chafes, breaking and
many others as the rear casing was made of the cup and most on the
fan-followers tend to be with this grumble. There are actually n volume
of things that your users will have with this such as
high screen pixels there together with the phone actually are good that makes it really simple
to see any of the data like the Video clips, Movies and so forth There are several presumptions
that after the particular earthquake plus
the Tsunami problem in Japan the actual launch regarding iPhone5 can
be early. But we will need to wait until the phone will not be at this time there in the market.