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Tuesday’s TPS Report: Donali Pleated Dress

BOSS Black Donali Pleated Dress | CorporetteOur daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. Oooh: love this intriguing faux wrapped skirt and dress from Boss Black. Love the high V-neck (and high back), the pleated waistline, the ladylike length, and the fun colors — it's available in both orchid and black. It was $575, but is now marked to $402.50 at Bloomingdale's. BOSS Black Donali Pleated Dress (If you love that orchid, here's another Boss dress, priced even lower, but with only lucky sizes left.) Here are a lower-priced version and (here and here). Seen a great piece you?d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com. (L-6)

Sales of note for 12.10

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

Some of our latest threadjacks include:

208 Comments

    2. Fooey! I also love this dress, Kat –it is a great pick and think that the manageing partner would have approved it for me to buy! DOUBEL FOOEY if it is realy sold out!

      I would specificaly like to thank Tesyaa and Bacon Pancakes, two of my best freind’s in the HIVE, for giveing me the strength and backup I need to tell mom and dad that I will NOT get back with Alan Sheketovits. I have some amount of pride left — which he did his best to stifel — but I am now a partner and do NOT want to have to revert to where I was with him 5 year’s ago. He is still w/o his CPA and he is just another schlub with a BS in accounteing but NO CPA. Since dateing him, I have met alot of men, includeing Doctor’s and Internet guru’s that are much more succesful then Alan is, or ever will be. I had a probelem with his bedroom etiquete, shall we say, and do NOT want to have to go back to all of that. Also, he OOOGLED other women even when we were dateing, so I have NO IDEA if I could ever trust him again. So I will tell mom to tell Alan’s mom that I have mooved on. YAY!!!!!

      As for some good news, the manageing partner’s brother gave me a nice brooch, which he said he had bought for his wife just b/f she threw him out of the house for good. He did not want it to go to waste and has not met any other women worthy of it, so he gave it to me and said I would look good weareing it! The manageing partner made me put it on and said I should wear it to court with my RED dress. I agree, but it goes with alot of other dresses. The manageing partner’s brother also want’s me to go with him to a show next week. I think I will go b/c he picked out a nice restrunt I have NOT been to but want to try.

      Myrna think’s the manageing partner’s brother may still have sexueal design’s on me, but I said I could keep him from acting on them while still haveing a good time out with him. I just will NOT let him into my bedroom even if he come’s over to my apartement. He will surely be alot better then Alan, who always made me feel inferior to him. FOOEY on him!

    3. Funny, I don’t like this at all – seems really meh and not flattering, with too much volume on the top AND bottom.

      1. It looks a little big on the model, but I think it’s absolutely gorgeous and would be stunning, especially on someone with curves.

      2. I love it, but not for work. Something just doesn’t read workwear to me. I think for a wedding it would be lovely.

        1. I agree, this is not a work dress. It’s pretty for brunch on the weekend or similar.

          1. Every time I see a pretty dress recommended for brunch, I just think “WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE WEARING DRESSES TO BRUNCH?” I consider not-pajamas a real success.

            But I agree on it not being a work dress.

          2. I wear dresses to brunch! It’s easier to put a dress on than pants and a shirt. 1 piece versus two things that have to match and be clean.

    4. I love this dress and would wear it to work. It still seems to be in stock in some sizes. The quality of Boss items is amazing. IMO it’s one of the few brands that has not started cutting corners.

      1. I love the ‘cheaper’ one she links to in the post, a ponte sheath dress. If I had all the moneys I would buy it a size up and have it tailored bc the waist is just perfect for me. I guess Boss is going on my future dress buying list!

  2. Threadjack – I am trying to build up my work wardrobe of dresses. Where I live, summertime is quite hot and humid. I am a curvy pear (sort of X), so sheath dresses work, with tailoring. The above dress wouldn’t work on me because I am quite tall/leggy. So many places are showing fit-and-flare dresses this season though!

    Do you consider fit-and-flare dresses appropriate for work, if they are sleeveless? (Length aside–I wouldn’t wear one of the “skater” dresses!)

    Something about sleeveless fit-and-flare screams “sundress” not “work dress” to me. I’d wear a cardi regardless, but am curious on everyone’s thoughts.

    TIA.

    1. I agree that fit and flare dresses seem more casual than sheath dresses, in the same way that flippy skirts seem more casual than pencil skirts. However, a fit and flare dress with a cropped blazer (instead of a cardigan) could work fine for many offices.

    2. I think a fit and flare in a suiting material (lightweight wool) and a subdued color (navy, grey, forest green, maroon) would be fine. I would avoid really bright colors and stretchy, ponte-type materials. And, of course, length matters.

    3. I think A-line dresses and fit and flares can be business casual. Pick something with a conservative neckline and a work-appropriate color or print. I am also taller, and sometimes a fuller skirt makes me feel less like the material is riding up my leg.

      I know some folks here don’t like LE, but this is an example of an A-line that would be fine for my bus cas workplace w/a cardigan (I don’t think the back v is super office-appropriate, but with a cardi that’s not an issue). http://www.landsend.com/products/womens-ponte-a-line-dress/id_280140

      1. This LE dress would work in my office too, with a cardigan. If it had sleeves and didn’t have that deep V in the back (like how other LE dresses are designed), I could just wear that.

      2. Yeah, I agree, fit and flares can be office appropriate depending on how much flare there is. I have a few of the LE ponte dresses and the fabric is heavy enough and the skirts are the right length that I feel like they are work appropriate for most offices, at least on non-important-meeting days.

    4. I totally wear fit and flare dresses to work, but I’m a huge fan of this style dress (and not a fan of an A-line dress), so I do whatever I can to make it work.

      Depending on the dress and the season, I wear them with cardigans or blazers. I also wear them with button downs underneath or just sleeveless.

    5. I wear fit and flare dresses in suiting material to my business formal office. As long as they’re made of formal material (i.e., wool not ponte) and a conservative neckline/length, I think they look fine. I wear jackets with them. They’re just easier than sheath dresses for me.

      I specifically have this one, which I love (http://www.theory.com/miyani-edition-dress/F0001602,default,pd.html?dwvar_F0001602_color=001&start=3&cgid=womens-dresses) but is longer on my as I’m pretty short.

    6. I am built similarly and wear a-lines and fit-and-flares constantly. My office puts the casual in business casual, though, so I can’t really address how they’d work in your office. Also sleeveless seems to be not an issue in Los Angeles. I wear a cardigan with them because the office is overly air-conditioned, not because I’m afraid someone will be offended by the sight of my arms.

  3. What are your favorite ways to reenergize/recharge that don’t take much time? I’m going through a super busy time right now and can’t really slow down besides maybe taking an hour every week or two to meet a friend or something like that. I’m feeling a little run down and want to nip that in the bud before I start getting really burnt out. Any suggestions?

    1. A nice cup of tea and reading the paper online for a few minutes in between tasks.

    2. -Making an old fashioned paper to-do list (um, sometimes writing down things that I already did) and having a lovely time X’ing out (complete with House Hunters International side effects) completed tasks

      -Having a getaway / fun day trip or vacation planned to daydream about or research part of

      -Getting my favorite coffee treat and some fresh air while I’m at it (I buy coffee out 2x or less a month so that is a reward for me – substitute with your favorite low cost mood booster)

      -Appreciating that staying in the groove and getting stuff done is easier than having really slow days followed by super busy days (at least it is for me – nothing worse than having a slow day and then an emergency pop up at 5pm when I’m already in the countdown to leaving early…)

    3. I have a playlist of “Songs To Make Me Happy” that I’ll just set on shuffle. Taking five minutes to get up and dance around (with the door locked!) to something fun every two hours or so does wonders for my mood.

      2. I put on a musical/showtunes internet radio station and my earbuds and sing-a-long (silently in my head) ;o)

        1. Sometimes I do end up singing them out loud – I’ve totally been busted in my office singing “My Fair Lady.”

          2. so appropriately, Corner of the Sky from Pippin just came on and I am finding it So. Hard. to stay still and not sing out loud because important people can see and hear me where I am sitting today. GAH!

          3. My coworkers have caught me singing along a few times. Sometimes it’s so hard not to!

        1. To be fair, quite a bit of it isn’t in English – my taste in music is /very/ eclectic – but some of the more mainstream ones –

          La Vie Boheme – Cast of Rent
          There’s a Class for This – Cute is What We Aim For
          Starry Eyed – Ellie Goulding
          Downtown Girl – Hot Chelle Rae
          Bang Bang – Jessie J. ft. Ariana Grande and Nicki Minaj
          Salute – Little Mix
          Good Time – Owl City ft. Carly Rae Jepsen
          Anklebiters – Paramore
          Breakin Dishes – Rihanna
          Uptown Funk – Ronson & Bruno Mars

          Basically, if it’s got a beat and it makes me smile, it goes on the list. :)

          2. To handcrafted beers made in local breweries
            To yoga, to yogurt, to rice and beans and cheese
            :) o/~

          3. to leather, [[this one’s dirty]], to curry vindaloo
            to huevos rancheros, and Maya Angelou

          4. (HELL YEAH to this thread :P)

            Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion
            Creation, vacation
            [[Whoops another dirty one]]

      4. I love this. I have occasional dance parties at home but this is a great way to get me moving in the office.

      5. I listen to old-school hiphop in my office when I’m going through a stressful period. It helps me just crank things out. I also give myself a break on letting things slide i.e. laundry/putting my clothes away/cooking. Usually when I’m really busy, the idea of going home after a 15 hour day and making dinner is too overwhelming so I just get takeout and wine. (the wine is key)

        1. Funny, I am the opposite in that I feel more relaxed when things are put away…I get clutter anxiety! My “slide” areas tend to be cooking and actually doing the laundry. We were particularly busy last month and a colleague suggested sending laundry out. It was expensive but as a rarity, it was a nice thing to check that off the list.

    4. I really enjoy a walk in the park– if the weather is good. Also, taking my dogs to the dog park is also something that makes me smile. They are pretty adorbs when they play.

    5. Things that actually take time, but I find keep more productive:
      -exercise or even just take your dog for a walk (hopefully its not freezing where you live)
      – volunteer – lots of time this helps me put things back into perspective for my life and stops that drowning feeling which sometimes can paralyze me when I have too much to do
      – Call someone/meet up with someone and talk about anything other than work/things on your to do list item
      – bonus points if you can exercise or volunteer with someone else not related to your to do list

      I would also go through your to do list and ruthlessly prioritize and delegate any tasks that do not have to be done by you today/this week. Really very few things absolutely need to be done by you immediately.

      I’m also a big believer in multi-level to do lists. This sounds way type A but it really helps to keep a handle on all of your bigger/longer term projects while allowing you to keep focus on your day-to-day tasks. I have three levels (i manage an org of about 100 people doing some significant projects so this may be overkill for you). I have a giant white board on my wall with all of the organizations major projects on it with key tasks broken out below, some with deadlines that we need to drive towards. Then I have paper sheets with more specific project plans for each of the larger items on the board. These have deliverable dates, with people assigned to them, and each of the smaller steps that need to be taken broken out in greater detail. I then go through these paper project plans and make myself daily or a couple day to-do lists. (Also on paper, don’t underestimate how good physically crossing off items feels.)

      Writing that out sounds insane, but I find it a really helpful way to manage multiple large projects and a large-ish staff.

      If your stress/insane amounts of work is for a brief-ish period of time. I am a big believer in countdown clocks. I find it encouraging to be able to tell myself “I can do anything (go without much sleep, not see much of friends/family, etc.) for just four months (or whatever period of time.)” For some things I even go so far as to set up real countdown clocks on an app on my phone. Then plan a big-ish reward for yourself when you are done. Schedule a trip with friends or mentally just plan to take your dog into the woods for the weekend with no interruptions when you are done.

      Finally, be real about how much stress/how many commitments you can realistically handle. You can’t work at a spring forever. Be ruthless about saying no/quitting things if it’s just too much to handle. I was insanely over-scheduled recently, without an end in sight and just stepped down from serving on a fancy board and also took a leave from another major personal commitment. It was way too much to do and it was making me crazy. I never had time off to just veg/see friends.

      You can only be so busy/stressed for so long. I know RBG was on Harvard Law Review while raising a toddler and taking care of her sick husband (typing his papers, giving him her notes, etc.) but we’re not all her, ya know? I have to tell myself that I can still be a bad ass without being quite so insanely busy/stressed.

      Hang in there.

  4. Lots of money questions lately, so I thought I’d pose the following:

    How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined):
    – Make annually?
    – Save monthly for retirement?
    – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc,
    – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)?
    – Have in monthly debt obligations?

    Also, age range and location?

    1. Mid 20s in DC
      – We make about 150K
      – Liquid savings are about $220K. I don’t keep my savings separate- they’re all in our investment accounts, but I can have cash available in 48 hours or less.
      – Save almost $2K/month for retirement (separate accounts from the above)
      -SO has $500/mo in student loan payments and our mortgage is about $1400/mo

      1. Just wondering, what is the $220,000 for if not retirement? I ask because I sometimes think I am too retirement-heavy in my savings and investments. But then I think: what would I spend it on now, anyway? I like my house and car and vacations; the step-kids’ tuition is being paid for by all the various adults involved; we enjoy our social life…

        So what am I missing?

        1. I don’t know, it just isn’t earmarked for anything in particular. When we bought our house, the down payment came out of there. Basically everything we want we can pay for out of cash flow. We don’t want kids, so most likely it will be for retirement.

          2. Yeah, they’re low interest. Our investment returns are much, much higher than the interest rate, so it makes more sense to invest the money and make the monthly payments. Also, we have a weird mix of individual autonomy and integration in how we approach our finances, and this falls in his sphere of things. Obviously if I had an issue with it, we’d revisit, but since I don’t it’s mostly his decision.

        2. I do this too. After maxing out my IRA and TSP, I keep about $10,000 in checking/money market and keep everything else (about 180K) in a brokerage account. I can access that $ in about 48 hours if needed.

      2. Can I ask how you saved $220k already in your mid-20s?

        That seems to be only possible with a savings rate much higher than $2k.

        Apologies if this is too personal.

        1. 2K was my estimate of monthly what goes into specifically retirement savings per OP’s question. We save a ton more than that and have had crazy awesome returns on investments in recent years. Also, our living expenses are really minimal relative to where we live. We just don’t spend much.

    2. How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined):

      not combined

      – Make annually? ~$200,000
      – Save monthly for retirement? $3,350
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc, emergency fund complete. (I put aside $1,000/month for real estate taxes, tax prep fees and long term care insurance premiums, but that is not “saving” because I know when those bills are coming and what they are — it’s more a cash handling device)
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? $70,000 (remainder is either in tax-advantaged retirement accounts or a brokerage account I can access but do not because it is for retirement)
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $2,000 (mortgage for 15 more years + car payment for 18 more months)

      Also, age range and location? 48. Southern California.

    4. Did you also want to ask how much is already put aside for retirement?

    5. – I make $95K annually
      – I put 16% in retirement funds so that’s $1,267 monthly
      – Other buckets? I usually keep my bi-monthly salary checks in my checking account. I use this to pay bills, etc.
      – Liquidity? I have a stock account with about $16k. There’s about $1k in money market.
      – My rent is $1,800 per month. My car is paid off. I have no other debt.

      I’m 44 and live in the Boston area.

    6. — Make annually? $750k (combined)
      – Save monthly for retirement? $9,000
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – $3,000- $5,000
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? $300,000
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $8,500 (mortgage, law school)

      Also, age range and location? 38; Illinois

          1. So that is an incredible amount of money, but my immediate reaction is that it seems low if you are both partners. Did anyone else have that thought?

          2. No – she indicated that she is 38, so if she recently made partner, then that seems about right to me.

          3. we are both non-share partners and this doesn’t include bonus

      2. We’re newly in a similar tax bracket to you, and I feel like I really don’t know how to manage it. Do you have a financial planner of some kind? An accountant? How did you determine how much to save for retirement?

        1. As partners in big firms, we max out 401k plus have profit sharing available to us, which is a total of $50k or something like that for each of us each year (spread over the 12 months, its about $9k total). So the retirement savings part was easy. Figuring out what to do with the rest of the savings was not as easy. 40+% of the income goes to taxes and healthcare, so “take home” salary is much lower. We also have childcare expenses and our mortgage is fairly high (and we still have lawschool debt because our interest rate is so low), so that eats up a chunk of $$ every month.

          We did finally go with a financial planner, but it took us a few years to find someone we like, so for a while, our money was earning basically nothing sitting in the bank.

        2. We’re also in a similar tax bracket and we just bit the bullet and got a financial advisor from a colleague’s recommendation. Its been very helpful to have someone else review our savings/insurance/mix of investments and suggest new vehicles for our investing and also to confirm we’re on track for certain goals.

    7. – Make annually: $310K this year (combined)
      – Save monthly for retirement – ~$4700
      – Save monthly in other buckets – ~$400
      – Liquid savings: ~$250K
      – Monthly debt obligations: $3500

      Age range/location – 38, NY

    8. Last year we made $500K, kind of a fluke, probably the average is closer to $400K

      Save monthly for retirement: not that much right now since we have a nanny payment, about $1000. H has a fantastic defined benefit pension plan, and I have a slightly less fantastic defined benefit pension plan, plus we are Canadian so we would have $34K from Canada Pension and Old Age Security (although we are likely going to get clawed back on that). We have about $500K in retirement savings.
      Save monthly in kids education funds: $830
      No emergency fund, big liquid savings or “other buckets”, the house is almost paid off so we have a line of credit available against it for emergencies. Our paycheques and what we have in chequing account is sufficient for things like the furnance going unexpectedly, family vacations etc. I just don’t pay down the mortgage as much those months. We don’t have to worry too much about medical emergencies.
      House is worth $700K and will be paid off in 6 months-2 years (depending on my income).
      We pay $800 every 2 weeks towards mortgage (and chunks as I have it), property taxes are $500 a month. Car payments are $582/month. I pay $600/month for meal delivery, and $350/month for a personal trainer.

      I’ve done the math and we don’t need to save more agressively for retirement. That said, when the mortgage is done ($20K per year) and our nanny-share payments are done ($20K per year), then pay off the car loans, I will be saving more, because I don’t have anything else to spend that on. Donations, which we already do, will increase at that point too.

      We are mid/late 40s, 3 kids 12 and under.

      Truthfully, my mortgage is only at 2%, it’s kind of dumb to pay it down so quickly since I could make more investing that $. However, it makes me happy to think about being completely debt free very soon.

      1. Can I ask about how you think about saving for retirement with a defined benefit plan?

        I’ve already 20% vested in one defined benefit plan (meaning i will get 20% of my highest years pay once I reach retirement age so like $15-20k a year), with a org that I no longer work for. Depending on how my career goes, i could potentially vest further in this defined benefits plan (either by working more for this org or by buying additional years based on my work history.)

        I also save for retirement on my own with tax-advantaged vehicles. It’s not clear to me though relatively how well I am doing saving for retirement. When I read the numbers on things like this I start freaking out because other people have relatively more $ saved but I am guessing this includes their company 401ks.

        Is there like a specific type of financial adviser that specializes in something like this? Or any good books/blogs to recommend?

        1. Not the OP, but I’d be wary about relying too much on a (US-based, no knowledge of OUS) defined benefit plan or buying into one further. There’s a reason that type of retirement plan isn’t offered as often anymore – it’s hard for companys/governments to fund them to the appropriate levels to meet the plan obligations.

          The ability to access those funds at retirement will depend on the company still being in existence, the robustness of the plan, the funding it has and how much the boomers have drawn down on the resources. I think it should be factored in, and its nice to have concrete numbers attached to it, but I wouldn’t sink any more money into it, when I could be saving or putting it into a tax advantaged plan, unless you have strong assurances that the company and the defined benefit plan (and its funding) will continue to be around for 60 years.

          1. It’s a govt pension so I feel relatively confident it will exist in its current form since I have vested. The govt I work for is not at risk of going bankrupt anytime soon (a la Detroit) and is in a very strong union part of the country so I feel pretty good that my current benefits will be preserved.

          2. That’s good to hear, though I will caution that a city doesn’t have to boots up like Detroit to restructure public pensions downward, and pressure will grow on pensions that have more retirees than active members.

            Just be sure you understand what the pension funding situations looks like (is it fully funded? If not, what portion remains unfunded) and factor that into the stability of your defined benefit.

    9. How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined):
      – Make annually? $240,000 (including two salaries, and my bonus)

      – Save monthly for retirement? Not enough. Approx. $500/month total. We’re saving like mad for a house and kids are in the near future, so that’s coloring our decision to save less for retirement, but I’m constantly flip-flopping on this.

      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc, $2,400/month savings for general bucket, 95% of which will be for the down payment (HCOL area)

      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? $70,000 in savings today.

      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $200 car payment for 2 more years. Would pay it off earlier but we borrowed at 1.99%… no reason to.

      Also, age range and location? 30-32, Boston.

      For what it’s worth, we both made much less for a very long time (combined income was <$100,000 through about 18 months ago) and only recently came into the higher salary bucket. The retirement-or-downpayment savings tango keeps me up at night…

      1. RETIREMENT. See handle. You’re welcome.

        Seriously – you have the cash to at least max at your 401ks and IRAs. Do it.

      2. What? Why? The answer is obviously retirement first. If you’re not at least maxing out your 401k you cannot afford to be siphoning money off for a house.

        You’re saving about $6000 a year for retirement. You should default be at 18k per person. Massive problems here. Massive.

        If you can’t figure this out on 240k and no kids you’re in for serious financial problems through out your life.

        1. Not to pile on, but I do think you should take a look at where your money is going, especially since you were previously living on much less. You should definitely at least be saving 12% towards retirement (which just about maxes out a 401k for each of you). I’m surprised to see you’re only saving $2400, which is about how much we’re saving on half the income, with 12%+ going towards retirement. Did you significantly increase your standard of living after the raise?

        2. OP of this mini thread here. The $240k is an unintentional misrepresentation – that’s our gross income today, annualized. We have yet to actually realize more than $150k gross annually yet (a recent new job plus new bonus structure put us here today). We’ve been very fortunate to suddenly make a heck of a lot more than we did 6 months ago and way more than we did 18 months ago… still trying to figure this all out. This is part of why I appreciate posts like this… thanks for the advice – we’re off to do some reflecting and research.

          1. A revision (see? you’re all making me look at my numbers way more closely!): My 401k number did not factor in 401k contributions from my bonuses, which is more than 50% of my income, and is also part of this new financial situation we find ourselves in and adjustment we are having to make.

            So, jointly, we’re scheduled to contribute $17k/year to 401k. Not where I need to be (message = heard), but at least it’s better than what I said before.

        3. Another perspective on this (which yields a different conclusion) is that if Anon buys a house and pays off the mortgage by retirement, 95% of Anon’s retirement housing costs are taken care of (excluding taxes, maintenance, etc). Also, mortgage payments (unlike rent) do not increase making it easier for Anon to save money in the coming years.

          1. Also, with a house comes some additional tax write-offs. That’s not insignificant, especially in a higher tax bracket, especially in a HCOL area. I max out my 401k, but that’s ALL I’m doing right now while we are saving up for a down payment for house 2. Not having those write-offs is going to hurt this year as a renter. Goal is to have 20% available to put down, but only put down 10% and save the rest for “emergency.”

          2. Watch out for the AMT if you are in a high COL area with high state income taxes, especially if you are married. It’s like the marriage penalty on steriods.

          3. You still get to deduct you mortgage interest payments under the AMT. I get hit by it because my state taxes are so high, but less then I did before I bought a house.

    10. I feel a little awkward answering this because I am nowhere near most of the incomes I see, but here goes.

      Make annually? ~$85K
      Save monthly for retirement? $1,425 (20%)
      Save monthly in “other” buckets? I aim for another 20% of my take-home pay, but it usually ends up closer to 10-15%. So another $400-800.
      – Have in liquid savings? In liquid, $100Kish. Total net worth is just shy of $250K.
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? No debt. Rent is $1200.
      Age? 34

      1. Don’t feel awkward! I am almost dot on with you except that I don’t pay rent and my liquid savings are approx $200k.
        Age? 25

        It’s good to encourage people in our relatively lower brackets to post. I originally wasn’t going to!

        1. Oh man, I’m like half of you guys and was like “even the people who think they’re low are higher than me!” Definitely felt awkward.

          1. um, if I posted I would bring down the average by a million billion. ;o)

          2. I’m in the same boat. I’m working my way up for the industry, but yeah, nowhere NEAR the numbers everyone else is posting.

            However, by percentages… my 401k contributions come up to 17% of my total pay after my company match, my debt payments are approx 30% of my monthly take-home (mostly student loans), rent slightly more than that. I’m not rolling in money, but so far, I think I’m doing alright?

      2. +1

        Make annually? $130K combined
        Save monthly for retirement? $500 (I contribute a little over what my employer matches) and husband has a pension
        Save monthly in “other” buckets? None
        Have in liquid savings? Roughly $12k (about 3 months worth of bills)
        Have in monthly debt obligations? All our extra money goes to student loans because the interest rate is high. The actual minimum payments are two cars: $550; Mortgage: $1300; Student Loans (minimum payment): $330. Once student loans are paid off we will be focusing on retirement.

        Late 20’s, mid-sized city in the central US

      3. I make more, but my net worth is only about $5K because of my student loans. So, your doing great

    11. single, DC, mid-20s
      – Make annually? $60K
      – Save monthly for retirement? ~$1K (not including any match because not yet vested)
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc, ~$900
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? non-retirement only=~$35K, ~retirement= $25K
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $0.

      Some of the liquid savings were inherited in college, and they’ve been kept out of retirement funds for future downpayment etc, which is why there is a disparity.

    12. I’ll throw in – I’m way way poor compared to most of you, but I have to keep reminding myself that its still great compared to most of the country (or world, at that)

      – Make annually? Approx 80-90k combined for both of us (after expenses on our rental properties – we bring in an extra 30k from rental properties, but most of it goes right back out)
      – Save monthly for retirement? Right now, almost nothing – only 3% that employer matches in 401k, but rental properties are our long term investment strategy
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – Approximately $500 a month set aside for taxes because we always owe, $100 to HSA
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? Almost nothing other than the tax savings and medical savings (approx $5k in HSA) but we have a home Equity Line of Credit we could tap into when necessary and then dial back our debt repayments to pay it back down
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? Besides rental property expenses, approx $800 for mortgage, $1000 for other debt repayment (including car – almost paid off, student loans that are so low % we aren’t worrying about paying aggressively, etc). We are planning to start throwing an additional $500 a month at a loan we got related to the rental properties in the next few months.

      Basically, we are just barely hanging on but hope to start paying out more than we bring it over the next year or two. Realistically, we are never going to be that family who goes on expensive vacations, owns a fancy house or car, or is able to contribute much at all to our kids college tuition.

      Also, age range and location? Mid-30s, Midwest

      1. I’m with you!

        – Combined income: $85,000 (and we’re very grateful for it)
        – Retirement Contributions: I dialed it back to 3% to open a Roth IRA with another 6%. But now I’m thinking of using that 6% for a new roof. He is contributing 6%. We’re both at full match. Total in our 401K’s? $20K.
        – Save in other buckets: $100 per month Christmas fund, $100 every month for emergency savings
        – Liquid savings: Less than $2,000
        – Monthly debt: $950 mortgage, $400 student loan (his), $250 car, and 2 kids. NO CREDIT CARD DEBT!

        Mid-30’s (he’s early 40’s) in PA. I stayed home with the kids and worked part time for several years. I can’t expect to be financially set after that.

      2. Right with you too

        Combined: about $90k
        Retirement: nothing more than our employer-contribution into a (fiscally-responsible) state system
        Savings: a few hundred, maybe
        Liquid: a few hundred combined
        Monthly debt: student loans ($120/month) and home equity ($120/month) and mortgage ($1600/month). Paid off 2 big debts just last month which were the only remaining stragglers beyond home and student debt.

        We really need to refi, because I know we can get our mortgage about halved. We took out a HE loan to install HVAC in our house, but didn’t refi afterward (7 years ago). Our home is now worth well more than what we are financed for, so we should be able to roll the remaining HE loan into the mortgage, with a better interest rate, and a higher value-to-debt ratio. But, we need to wait, because we are not 12 months current on our mortgage. I think we can look at refinancing in the summer, if I recall.

        Mid-30’s (me) 49 (him) in a low cost-of-living rural university town

    13. Mid 20s in Boston area

      – 120k combined annual income
      – I save 12% and he save 15% for retirement (this puts us on track to at least surpass the 50% of income saved at 30, 100% saved at 35, etc. retirement marks)
      – Actively save about 2k each month (specifically for a down payment)
      – About 30k in liquid savings (50k if you include an index fund)
      – Currently no debt obligations

    14. Make annually? 80, 000
      – Save monthly for retirement? defined benefit pension, plus another $400 in a deferred compensation plan. Also have a rental property that will hopefully provide some income when we are older. Husband has a 401k from a previous employer, but I’m not sure how much it has. He will likely go back to work full-time when our youngest is older, hopefully for our state government which has a defined benefit pension.
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets –try to save about $800 per month
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? this fluctuates, but about $9,000
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $800 mortgage, $320 car, student loans (IBR plan. I also work for the government and hopefully will be able to take advantage of the loan forgiveness program)

      31, SW. 3 kids, husband works part-time/contract basis and stays home with the kids.

    15. – Make annually? > $150k/year base salary, $250K/year total comp.

      – Save monthly for retirement? > I max out my 401k each year.

      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc. > No targeted buckets or accounts; I just save whatever is left after my expenses are paid.

      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? $271K in cash. Another ~$250K in investments, half of that amount being in my 401K. And another $250K in unvested stock that will vest over the next 15 months.

      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $500 per month for my student loans.

      Also, age range and location? 34, single, Seattle.

    16. late 30s boston with 1 kid in daycare
      – combined $300k income
      – contribute max allowed (16k each?) to 401k retirement
      – currently not saving much and only 15k in savings because just bought and renovated a house (so used all $200k in savings and took short term loan) but will be saving 2k month in 1 year and 4-6k month in 3 years (assuming no more kids), which is what we did before house
      – debt of 2k/month long term (mortgage and student loans) plus 3k month short term (renovation loans)

    17. My long-term bf and I own a house together but have agreed for the most part to keep our financial lives separate so these numbers are based just on my finances.

      Make annually: $1ook

      Save monthly for retirement: 6% (to get my company’s complete match) or about $500. I have a crazy retirement savings benefit at my current company so this low amount hasn’t hurt me too much yet and has allowed me to pay for the majority of my grad school out of pocket. When I start my post-grad job though, this will be the first thing I start putting more money towards.

      Save monthly in “other” buckets: I contribute $1400 a month in my joint account with the bf to cover mortgage, utilities, misc. house stuff. Also, and additional $1400 into my IMMA. On an annual basis, I max out my HSA.

      Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash): $40k

      Have in monthly debt obligations: $1200 for the mortgage which comes out of the joint account with the bf. In a couple months will have a small student loan payment.

      Age range and location: 27, Detroit.

    18. Single, 36 years old, HCOL

      – Make annually? Last year was $250,000 + $75,000 bonus, gross. Rental income this year will add $15k.
      – Save monthly for retirement? I max out my 401(k) ($18k) early in the year. That’s the only tax-advantaged fund. Once that is done I will try to kick $3000 to my index fund (VTSAX) and $2000 extra to mortgage each month for the rest of the year. The bonus typically goes 80% to the mortgage, 20% to zero out all credit cards etc for the year.
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc,
      See above – once 401(k) is maxed out, will try for $5k monthly split over mortgage early repayment and stock index fund. Have a relatively lean emergency fund ($8,000) but would rely on the index fund for larger emergencies.
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)?
      Index fund: $31,500, Liquid savings account (earning around 1% or a little less): $8,000. (Have $136,000 in 401(k))
      – Have in monthly debt obligations?
      Mortgage: $1,300 (although that place is rented out for $900 per month so only pay $400 net), Rent $2,300.(don’t live in my mortgaged property)

      1. Forgot to add: $500 monthly car payment. Could pay it off but it’s at 0% interest.

      2. Married, 36, HCOL.

        Make annually – 350K approx combined gross
        Save monthly for retirement – I max out 401K, spouse maxes out SEP-IRA (usually about 30K) annually
        Save monthly in other buckets – about 1000/month to 529 plans, maybe 2000/month otherwise? Very lumpy though.
        Liquid savings – about 50K in bank accts, 50K in brokerage (easily liquidated)
        Monthly debt – mortgage $5K/month approx

      1. We have about 900K in retirement combined. Spouse has more because limit is higher for the SEP.

    20. How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined):
      – Make annually? 175-182/year

      – Save monthly for retirement? 10 percent into 401ks; 4% of my salary and 8% of my husband’s salary goes to defined benefit retirement plan contributions (mandatory). I also get a 4% match from my employer.

      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc.
      –This changes as our needs change. Right now we put $400 into short term savings, $300 into house repair fund, and put $600 extra toward debt. We also get small bonuses/3 paychecks a month four times a year—this money is allocated to savings or debt repayment.

      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)?
      –We have 30K in an emergency fund (I am thinking about moving some of this out of a savings account and into a mutual fund as we both have very stable jobs)
      –We have another 12K in our house repair fund
      –Another 3-4K in short term savings

      – Have in monthly debt obligations?
      -3500/month PITI, $220 car payment (will be paid off in a couple months), and $280 or so in student loans. The student loans are at a lower rate than the car payment and the mortgage, so after the car is paid off I think we are going to think about upping retirement contributions in lieu of continuing to pay extra toward debt.

      Also, age range and location?
      35, DC

      I wish our house payment was less, but a lot of it is taxes paid so we could be in a good school district (hope to have kids soon). I worked in biglaw for many years to pay off my law school and husband’s grad loans and also to save for the downpayment. Also saved our emergency fund from that salary. I’m a little worried about how we would build savings back up now that our income is significantly lower, especially once you through childcare into the mix (at which point we will no longer be saving).

      Edit- total retirement savings is about 180K.

    21. Wow…I am embarrassed. Anyways, here it goes:

      – Make annually?
      $115000
      – Save monthly for retirement?
      No
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc,
      No
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)?
      No (If stock counts, then $21000)
      – Have in monthly debt obligations?
      $600 for a property that I purchased. No car loan, student loan, mortgage, consumer debt

      Also, age range and location?
      31, Northern California

        2. I am a frugal person. But I don’t divide my money into categories like above. In the time I have worked (6 years), I have done the following:

          1. Paid of student loans: 40K
          2. Paid for the car currently fully paid off: 18K
          3. Gold bullion/jewelery for wedding: 40K (as I am South Asian)
          4. Property 1 fully paid off : 120K
          5. Property 2 paying off currently and will be paid off this year: 120K
          6. Retirement saving (purely company provided) 35K
          7. Investments in stocks: 21K

          So, I have $350K in assets, but I just cannot categorize like OP.

          1. You really do need to save for retirement, though!!!

          2. For #3 (and I am not judging you at all – I am educating myself, as I don’t have any close South Asian friends) – is that a fairly standard amount to spend on wedding gold jewelry? Again, zero judgment – I guess I never thought to add it up, though I know there is a lot of it (and it’s beautiful!!).

          3. sometimes a lot of that is actually gifted, too, not purchased by the bride.

        3. Yes…I need to do something for retirement. I will be putting away $200 per month for retirement. I know it is still not big. But I will start getting some monthly income from properties I purchased in a couple of years and I will put that completely into retirement savings.

    22. Combined, SO & I:

      – Earn: $500K annually in base salary, plus variable bonus (totaled $150K in 2014)
      – Invest for retirement: $6,830 monthly
      – Invest otherwise: $8K monthly, maybe? hard to determine (comp went up significantly this year, and bonuses just came in…basically, whatever money we have at the end of the month goes into savings)
      – Liquid savings: $40K sits in a savings account
      – Monthly debt obligation: Housing costs are about $3K if I recall correctly (SO pays); we don’t have credit card debt and have paid off our student loans

      We are in our early 30s and live in an HCOL city in the US. We are expecting any day now, so we will soon have to pay for childcare. I’m also not sure we will continue to earn as much money as we currently do because we’re both pretty burned out.

    23. – Make annually? – $210K (combined)
      – Save monthly for retirement? Max 401ks, approximately $275K saved
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc,
      $1400 to various places
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? ~ $50K
      – Have in monthly debt obligations = mortgage + student loans = $4K; childcare = $3K

      33 and 36, 2 kids, live in DC

    24. Mid 20s in Pittsburgh

      Single, annual is ~45k
      Retirement – I’m matching my 401K contribution with my employer, plus I have an IRA that was part of an inheritance
      Saving ~ 200/month and that all goes into a liquid savings account. Last year I used one of those “year savings calendar,” where you do $1 the first week, $2 the second week, etc. and really made a commitment to not touch it, so that was helpfully to see that I could actually save it up. I’m doing it a second year now and it’s going into the same account to build the interest. Total in there now is something like $2k, not counting the savings account I have dedicated to student loan payoff.
      Loan obligations – I’m three months shy of paying off my car (YEA!) and my undergrad loans are in deferment right now since I started grad school in the fall, BUT I’m still putting away that monthly amount into a savings account so I can pay on those from my income when they come out and have something to fall back on in an emergency.

      I know I need to look at my spending habits because I could be saving more if I actually put the effort into it.

    25. Make annually? 85K combined (SO is still in school for another few years)
      Save monthly? We don’t have defined buckets but right now we’re saving about 1200-1500 a month, will be wiped out soon by daycare costs. We have about 25K in defined retirement accounts (late 20s/early 30s).
      Liquid savings is about 12K, depleted a bit last fall to pay off a student loan in full.
      Monthly debt? Mortgage+student loans+car payments = just under 1800.

      Oh, and fairly large Midwest city.

    26. How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined): Combined with husband
      – Make annually? $395k base, maybe $50-60k total bonus
      – Save monthly for retirement? Max out 401ks (so, $3000 a month total) and $2000 for whole life insurance policies (we have a ton of term insurance so consider the whole life policy as an investment vehicle)
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc, ~$2500 ($1000 for general savings, $500 for savings account for child for college (will eventually open a 529), $500 for house maintenance, remainder for vacation). We also save $2000 a month for our tax bill, but I don’t consider that savings
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? $100k
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $5,500 ($3500 for mortgage plus taxes and home insurance (which we esrow), $500 for a car, $1500 in student loans
      — Total in retirement – maybe $250k in 401ks; whole life insurance policies don’t have much value now, as we just bought them a few years ago.

      Early 30s, Chicago

    27. Wowww these are so interesting. I am in a one year clerkship and going to a law firm next year. Graduated law school this spring with no savings and lots of debt.

      Make annually? ~60K

      Save monthly? i set aside $350 (roughly 10%) at the beginning of the month and then add whatever is leftover (usually i end up around $150 under-budget). short-term goal is getting to 10,000 in emergency savings. i am almost there!

      Liquid savings – around 8k

      Monthly debt? with IBR, around $650

    28. How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined): (Just me – I live with my boyfriend, but our finances are completely separate. No kids.)

      – Make annually? $100k base plus bonus (really variable)
      – Save monthly for retirement? At least $1125/month, really a bit more. I always max out my IRA at the beginning of the year, which averages out to around $460/month plus 8% to 401(k), which is another ~ $666. I keep the same percentage for bonuses so that adds extra and also get a partial match on the 401k. Will increase this if income goes up, since my lifestyle is pretty comfortable now and I don’t really need much extra cash.
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc. – approximately $1000/month. $250/month for vacations, rest to a house down payment fund/extra emergency savings.
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? About $10,000 in cash, but my emergency fund is in easily accessible savings bonds – that’s another $7500. I also have $12k in an index fund that I consider part of my retirement but could be liquidated in case of a larger emergency.
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $1,000 for student loans (very low rates), $225 car payment (I double it and pay $500, should be paid off in another 1.5 years). $1000-ish minimum for rent and utilities.
      — Total in retirement – about $70k.

      30 years old, large mid-Atlantic city.

    29. 30, married, PNW

      – Make annually?
      $125-135K, depending on bonus; husband currently in grad school, making $0

      – Save monthly for retirement?
      ~ $950, which is 10% of my base income ($120k); employer matches 5% and usually contributes another 3% in profit sharing, for a total of 18% of my total income for the year. I also contribute about $2k after tax to a Roth IRA. I probably will contribute (with employer match) around $25,400 to retirement this year. My husband will contribute $0.

      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc,
      $1000 to savings account

      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)?
      ~ $70K total: $15,000 in savings account, $5000 in checking (as a cushion, we use rewards credit cards and pay them off every paycheck), $50K in money market fund

      – Have in monthly debt obligations?
      ~ $3000 total: $2100 in mortgage payment, $500 to my student loans (aggressively paying off), $200 to husband’s student loans (aggressively paying off), $200 to HELOC (1.5 times normal payment). Student loans will be paid off by 1/1/2017. No car payments. Mortgage and HELOC are both around 3.5%.

      Total currently in retirement accounts: ~ $75k
      Equity in home: ~ $160k
      Approximate net worth: ~ $305k

    30. I’m almost 26. I make $125K annually (started at $95K with a Masters) and I live in NYC.

      I max out all retirement, so about 18% annually. I also max out my HSA, but have cheap insurance with a high deductible. I started when I was 20 and am now at $88K. I have $63K in non-retirement savings. This will (one day) go to a down payment when I’m not living in NYC anymore. I try to do $2K a month in other savings.

      Monthly debt is zero. This has only worked for me because I was lucky enough to have generous parents who paid for college and I had low loans from grad school thanks to a TA-ship. Also, I have kept a reasonable lifestyle. My monthly rent is only $1,100 though I could afford more and I don’t have very expensive clothes / going out / gym habits. My largest expense is travel for my LDR.

    31. Alright I may need to be yelled at for not saving enough but here goes:

      single/late 20s
      -make 90K annually
      -I save $200/month for retirement + I usually put in another couple thousand at the end of the year before the RRSP deadline
      -other savings: $1200/month
      -I have a mortgage with a low interest rate of about $1000 a month but that’s basically like me paying rent

      FWIW, we get taxed a ton so my savings end up being approx 22% of my takehome plus I live in a HCOL area.

    32. How much do you (and/or significant other, if finances are combined):
      – Make annually? ~$35k (single)
      – Save monthly for retirement? BWAHAHAHA, right now $0.
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc. I generally move whatever is left in my checking account over to savings, can range from $25 – $200/mo right now.
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? $14k
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? $900 mortgage, $200 in private student loans (fed are in IBR and my payment is $0 right now). No car payment, no rolling credit card payments (I use it for all expenses and pay it off every week).
      – Total in retirement? ~ $35k

      Also, age range and location? mid-30s, Central PA

      I also currently pay for my own health insurance at $170/mo. I have a rent payment of $670 as I am not living in my house (my tenants are running out their lease). I make a tiny bit on the rent of my house, but it all goes into the house account, which I never touch unless something in the house needs fixed. I have a small inheritance coming in April that will allow me to buy a new car in cash (current car is 14 years old and killing me with gas mileage issues) and cover a few other expenses that have been put off for a while.

    33. 30, single, DC

      – Make annually? Biglaw, so $230 this year with another $70 in bonus for $300
      – Save monthly for retirement? I max out my 401K. Am considering adding an IRA this year, since I’m on track to pay off my student loans in the next 14 months. I focused on student loans and my house when I first started working, so I only have about $45k in retirement savings
      – Save monthly in “other” buckets – emergency funds, down payment funds, vacation funds, etc)? Nothing 0r very little, just trying to pay off my student loans. Anything left over at the end of the month, I round down to the next hundred and put towards my highest interest loan.
      – Have in liquid savings (ie: bank savings account, or other easily accessible cash)? About 22k, would like to get this up to 25k by the end of the year
      – Have in monthly debt obligations? mortgage of $2,100, condo fee of $400, student loan min. payment of $1,150, pay about $4,500 extra in student loans every month. On track to pay off my student loans next March, at which point I can leave biglaw … I can’t wait

      1. Holy cow. I should have just bit the bullet and gone into biglaw for a couple of years. I knew how big the salaries were, but didn’t really factor in the bonuses. My “bonus” last year was a Tervis tumbler with the organization’s logo on it. I don’t even like Tervis tumblers.

        1. Biglaw will take just about 5 1/2 years of my life (hopefully, assuming I get out when planned). But it will pay off my student loans, paid for the downpayment on my house, got me a new car, and paid for four international vacations. I may hate my job, but at the end of the day, I think of it is setting me up for my later life. But this might just be wishful thinking to make it through the day.

          And this is double any of my previous bonuses. The bonus amounts went up A LOT this year. And I’m a few hundred hours over the requirement.

    34. Me: 29, married with joint finances in an extended suburb of DC, husband is 38

      Make annually, combined: about $215K

      Save monthly for retirement: about $2200. He maxes his TSP, I contribute about 15% of my income. We both have defined benefit pension plans in addition. He is vested. I am close to vesting. I am looking to up my contributions. Already have a combined $180k in retirement savings.

      Save in other buckets: right now this is higher than normal bc we need to replace a car, and would like to pay cash without touching investments. Right now we save about $1200/mo for vacation/a new car ($600 each), $600/mo for taxes, $200/mo for Christmas/other gifts, about $650 for maintenance on the cars/house (which was built in the 50s and needs some things this year).

      Have in liquid savings: between investments and savings, about $90k. We a
      So have some money in our whle life insurance policies, but I’m not sure how much, since we don’t touch it.

      Have in monthly debt obligations: $1125 mortgage/property taxes, $2000/mo student loans, $350 in car payments (we’re ahead and will be done by the end of the year.

    35. Early 20s, SF Bay, Just me
      – Make annually: ~ 110K
      – Retirement: none
      – Savings: $1000???
      – Monthly debt obligations: ~$3300/mo in student loan + cc + car

    36. Late, but I enjoyed all this data so it’s only fair to add mine.

      Both 31, 2 kids in daycare, suburb of DC.

      Combined Income: $250k
      Monthly Retirement Savings: We both max our 401k /TSP, and add to Roths if we can when we do our taxes. So a little over $3k/month. Currently have ~250k saved.
      Other Monthly Savings: Whatever’s left after expenses. Not much because of daycare.
      Liquid Savings: About $50-60k in cash, another $75k in investments
      Monthly debt obligations: $2750ish – mortgage (PITI) and one car payment.

  5. Okay, deep breath… I have a job interview coming up! Scary thought. I haven’t interviewed for a job in 10 years and I’ve been at the same place for 25 years. This would involve a big move geographically. Academic administration, not corporate, so obviously not the same as what many of you are used to.

    But what I’m really here for is help with clothes, etc. I do not wear suits so I’ll have to buy one. This job is a level above my current position but full-time administration so it’ll be required. I am apple shaped (I guess?) with a large chest. I have a difficult time buying pants because I don’t have much waist shape and I have narrow hips and thighs (but carry weight in my stomach). So blah. Hard to find jackets that will fit my chest and not be too wide in the shoulder. Probably would go with a skirt? Pants are just too hard.

    Does anybody have suggestions for brands of suits or cuts that might work for me? I’ll be starting to shop this weekend.

    I already bought more conservative versions of my regular earrings. I normally wear hoops (studs poke me in the neck) so I bought some pretty huggie hoops at Macy’s last weekend. Shoes are covered. I normally paint my nails in non-conservative colors (right now Zoya Loredana – a gunmetal color) and I’m willing to go neutral. I bought a couple peachy beige colors (Zoya Lauren and Ulta Freshwater Pearl). If I wear ballet pink, it looks really pink against my skin tone.

    Thanks in advance for any advice!

    1. For jackets you’re obviously going to need to get them tailored. Talbots might be a good start?

    2. Agree with anonymous at 10:32 that tailoring will be involved. I like the dress + jacket suit. It feels much more comfortable than pants and even sometimes a skirt, but looks very put together. Talbots has them. Not crazy about the JNY fabrics, but JNY carries them. The Calvin Klein ones at Macy’s can be hit or miss.

      Good luck!

      1. Thanks! Seems like a lot of people are suggesting Talbots so I’ll probably start there. I looked at Macy’s on Saturday and they were really picked over (on sale that day), so it may not be worth it to go there.

    3. Okay. We’re in the same industry. I’m in IT for a University in New England.

      Yes, you need suit-like clothes, but you don’t necessarily need a suit. For my current job, I wore suiting separates to the interviews and there were many. I ended up going through 3 or 4 rounds and meeting with 8 or 10 different people over a couple of weeks.

      This was in summer, if that makes a difference. I had a couple of black blazers and a black houndstooth print blazer. I varied the skirts. I wore a mix of black pencil skirts and a black print skirt with black heels.

      The important thing is to look polished. In New England, as you probably know, we wear less makeup so I didn’t have to worry about that. But I don’t think you need to buy a full suit for any place in Higher Ed. You just need to find a look that reads as professional.

      1. Hmmm… well, at this level of administration, I think I might need a suit, although I’ve considered pencil skirt and blazer. I have I’ll look and see what I can find. For my videoconference interview, I wore a black v-neck dress and a structured cardigan, but they couldn’t see much of me. When I ran a search for a comparable position a few years ago, all of our candidates wore suits. It’s not in New England, but yeah, I experienced the makeup/jewelry thing on an interview in PA years ago.

        1. No pencil skirt and blazer. Matching suit. It is not the same thing. Most jobs will expect you to be wearing a full suit and I’d err on the side of caution.

          1. That’s what I was assuming. Thanks. My workplace is pretty casual, but that upper level of administration is more formal and I know it’s expected. It will be a huge change for me if I take the job, but I’m willing to take a shot!

          2. yeah, full suit at least for a first interview. If you have several days of interviews, I think you can relax it a bit with mix and match for the subsequent days.

          3. It’s dinner the night before then one full day. I figured, for the dinner, I could wear a pencil skirt, plus sweater or jacket, depending on the weather.

  6. Try Talbots Heritage cut pants. They don’t fit me because I have a small waist and bigger hips and thighs, so it would seem like they are designed for your body type – slim hips/thighs and wider waist.

  7. Does anyone in NYC have a recommendation for where to buy a leather sofa? We’d like to not spend a ton of money but want something of at least decent quality.

    1. I don’t know specifically about leather, but Macy’s has really good furniture sales. I would also look at Costco, since they carry a lot of leather, are known for quality and prices include delivery.

      Last year I bought 2 matching sofas from Macys plus a sectional from Costco, and so far, so good – they are holding up to my family’s heavy use.

    2. I got my leather couch from a closeout sale at Thomasville (which I know is out on the island). 7 years later, it still looks like new — and it’s really comfy. It’s a 3-seater, dark brown leather, I paid ~$1,350 for it and delivery was either free or like $50.

    3. Not sure about their sofas, but I got a nice leather chair from Raymour & Flanagan. They were having a sale. There’s a showroom on the UWS if I recall correctly.

    4. I love our leather sofa from Modani (near Union Square), if you’re going for a modern look. It’s so sleek and comfortable, and has held up reasonably well considering the abuse it takes in our house.

      1. I have one from there and I hate it. It’s still functional after 3 years, but it started looking worn after 1 year, and I’m a single person that works a lot. The one spot I used to sit on is noticeably sunken compared to the other seats (and I’m not a heavy person). The leather is cheap and it grabs dirt and doesn’t let go. (I got a white couch)

    5. Room & Board has some of the nicest value for the price, if you’re looking to spend that much. My sofa wasn’t terribly expensive, but it also wasn’t leather.

    6. Raymour & Flanagan have nice looking leather couches at reasonable prices. If you have access to a car, there is a Macy’s Furniture Outlet on Long Island (Glen Cove Road, Carle Place); they have a clearance section in the back, while it is hit or miss, and a lot of the merchandise has some wear and tear, you can sometimes find a great deal. Bought an amazing leather sleeper sofa for a fraction of the retail price there. If you do make it out, there are a bunch of furniture stores on that road (Raymour, Jennifer Convertibles, Lazy-Boy), so could be worth your while.

    8. We got our leather couch at Macy’s Herald Square – they have a huge showroom and lots of options.

      I also have a few friends who have had a great couch buying experience at Bloomingdales.

  8. I will be shadowing my organization’s CFO tomorrow (I’m in government) – a very capable woman with whom I’d like to build a mentoring relationship if possible. I’m working on a list of questions to ask if we have a few minutes to just chat – any suggestions?

  9. Sigh.

    DH’s boss has given her retirement date, for about 15 months. He will apply for her job as he knows of some of the others who will apply and he’d rather not work under a few of them.

    It will be a big competition with many applicants.

    We don’t need him to make more $ or have more responsibility. That said, he acts for her whenever she is away and can do the job no problem.

    I think it is likey he will get it. However he will spent a lot of time preparing for this competition. So much time. And he just did his language training and I am sick of picking up the slack!! I have a responsible job and we have 3 children 12 and under, and somehow, he never has to pick up any slack for me!

    OK, vent over.

    1. Do you want advice or commiseration? I’ve got thoughts but won’t share if you just needed to vent.

    2. YES. This happens to me ALL.THE.TIME. When DH and I talk about it, he concedes that I pull a disproportionate share of the weight, but he says that whenever he tries to do something for me or otherwise return the favor, he says he can’t come up w/ anything because I’m super independent and don’t need anything. We don’t have kids, which probably makes a lot of difference though. I get annoyed because yeah, I don’t need anything and so I see how he’s in a difficult position wrt this, but that doesn’t mean that I always need to be the one to accomodate!

      Sorry for hijacking your vent. What I meant to say is that you’re not alone and I definitely understand.

    3. Can you ask for something concrete that will make you happier? Could be hiring out the cleaning or laundry until the competition is over, or that he will take the kids out of the house for 3 hours every Sunday morning, or a week-long vacation in a place that you love but he hasn’t wanted to go… anything like that. Life as a couple is a negotiation, and I know sometimes I’m guilty of stewing in silence instead of putting my needs on the table.

      1. I hadn’t thought of the vacation one, that is good.

        We have a part time nanny now that the kids are all in school full time, who does clean and do laundry when they are at school. She’d just not that awesome at it. One of us absolutely needs to be home at 6 though. It is usually me, but at times like this it will be me all the time.

        I use a meal service for 4 out of 5 week night dinners.

        Everything is just always my responsibility, even if I hire it out, you know?

        You are right though, that stewing is silence is not healthy or productive. South of France, here I come :)

        1. I have no kids, so I have no idea if this is possible. Why not “assign” one night a week that he has to be home at 6. Hard stop. He fills it in on calendar and assistant knows not to schedule over. Work emergencies happen, but most of the time you can continue work from home (not sure if this is always possible with kids). That night is yours to do work catch-up, personal stuff, whatever.

          1. I actually do this with my husband. I have an activity one night a week, it is on the schedule. And when there is kid stuff that he should go to I just email his assistant to put on his calendar. He is generally really busy and kind of ruled by his calendar, but he can get away when there is something concrete blocked off. So discuss with him if he can schedule in advance at least one night a week to be home by 6, and try to be pretty firm about enforcing it for at least a few weeks until it becomes more routine (i.e., confirm at the beginning of the week, and the night before, “Remember you’re on Wednesday night,” and remind kids too so it can be something they look forward to – ‘Daddy night’.)

          2. Thnaks guys, we actually do have a couple of nights where he has to be home by 6, hard stop, for my 11 year old son’s hockey. Unfortunately, I also have to behome by 6 those nights since we also have a 5 year old and the nanny leaves at 6. The 12 year old can get herself to most of her things (in the neighbourhood) but sometimes requires chaufferring too.
            What I really need is an on-call babysitter for the 6-7pm hour somedays and an on-call driver.
            My inlaws live just a few blocks from us and are retired, but seem to be busy most of the time when we occasionally ask. Maybe I’ll see about developing a relationship with a cab company or particular driver that I would feel comfortable shuttling my daughter if need be. 3 kids and only 2 parents can be tough.

            Just thinking out loud though, maybe I get him to take the 5 year old to hockey. Neither Daddy nor 5 year old like this option much but maybe they just need to suck it up once a week.

            I feel bad, the littlest guy has only been registered in two activities in his life, skating lessons last winter and soccer last spring. ;( This year we missed the registration for skating, and I am not sure how we coudl ahve gotten him there some days anyway.

          3. You ‘feel bad’ because a FIVE YEAR OLD has “only” been registered in two activities?

            I think I found your problem.

  10. How closely does your life align with where you thought you’d be at the age you’re at when you were younger? It’s something I’ve been thinking about recently… I think I’m actually pretty close with a few exceptions.

    1. how is it close/different for you? Also, how old were you when you were imagining your life? I’m mid 20s and my life is very different than what I expected, but how could it not be when I was like 18 or 20 at the time?

    2. I think mine matches up pretty closely with the exception of skipping grad/professional school. I’m in my late 20s, my career is taking off, I’m newly married, the works. I do think the marriage part is partially sheer luck but other than that, I’ve worked hard to get to where I’m at so far.

    3. Not much actually. I figured I’d be single and more career focused. Instead, I’m married, working what I consider a challenging, but more ‘relaxed’ job on my career path. I waffle back and forth if I’m okay about the career part, but I have a lot of life goals that I feel like I should address (or just drop) before I commit.

      All that said, I’m pretty happy where I’m at.

    4. Honestly, career-wise…I meticulously planned what I wanted to do and how I was going to do that (and pay for it) from the time I was in high school, and it’s panned out that way – although I am in a very different specialty than I ever imagined myself in. On the personal side though, I would have never guessed that I’d be married at my age – just found the right guy young.

    5. Career wise – about where I thought I’d be

      Living situation – figured I’d be a homeowner by now, but we still rent

      Family situation – figured I’d be married with several children, but am recently engaged with no children yet.
      Have expected close relationship still with parents/siblings

      Personal – have fewer close friendship than I thought I’d have. Travel less than I thought I would (mostly b/c my fiancé, who is awesome in many ways, doesn’t like to fly and doesn’t have as much free time as I do for travel).

      Also I thought we’d have flying cars by now. And marriage equality on a federal level.

      Mid 30s

      1. Wow, I’m just curious – at what age did you expect marriage equality on a federal level by now?? Because as much as I have always wanted it, I could have never predicted that it would be as widespread on even a state level as it is now.

        1. By the time I got to college I figured that we were probably only a decade or so away. I guess I was over-optimistic :)

          Hopefully in another decade same-gender couples everywhere will be able to drive themselves away from their wedding receptions in their flying cars :)

    6. I am doing much better in every respect than I ever could have imagined in my wildest dreams. Fifteen years ago I was a depressed, bulimic, self-harming, suicidal mess with no ambitions (barely graduated high school) and almost no social life. Now I’m married to a great guy, mom to a wonderful kid, and a successful attorney in a city I love far away from my hometown. I am happy and secure in way I never thought possible.

      2. I agree. It gave me chills (and hope for others close to me!) Congrats and kudos!

    7. Couldn’t be more different. Mid-50s.

      Thought I’d still be in private practice with a high-powered career. Thought I’d be married. I guess I thought I might be a grandmother by now (DS is 28). Thought I’d have a big fancy house and a ton of money. Thought I would be traveling the world. Basically thought by now I’d have the world on a string.

      Instead I’m starting over again after my second divorce. DS is still single. I love my job but it’s in government and not quite the high-powered career I envisioned when I was younger. I do have a new house that I am fixing up but it’s quite modest. Travel has been on hold for the past few years and will not happen to the extent I’d hoped due to my reduced post-divorce circumstances.

      But… I wouldn’t change a thing. I love my new life. I have a lovely new man in my life which is so surprising and wonderful that I don’t even know what to think about it, I am still financially solvent, I’m in good physical shape (give or take a broken ankle), I have good friends, and my son is doing well. Maybe I do have the world on a string after all!

      1. are you my mom? Your life sounds SO much like hers. except her divorce was 7 years ago and her DS is a DD (me! :)) but she recently moved to be closer to family & is starting over too. I’m so proud of her for being brave enough to take chances in her mid-50s. sometimes it is hard. but I think she’s doing okay. you are both awesome!

    8. All I thought about when I was younger was marriage and family… I started that pretty young and was exactly where I dreamed of being at 25 (married and a mom). But raising a young girl made me re-think my dreams and now I’m playing catch-up education and career-wise. So at 32 I’ve crossed off the goals that were oh-so-important to me as a teenager, but since then have created a much bigger vision that I’m currently working on.

      1. I like this… we seem to hear a lot more often about women who go the other way, and take a step back, for their kids, it’s neat to hear of someone who started to dream bigger career-wise because of having kids.

        1. Thank you… I never understood the need for female empowerment until I birthed two. Then I realized *I* was cut out to be (and wanted to be) more than just a mother and wife.

    9. Very different. Thought I was going to be high flying career woman while husband did most of household stuff. Then I realized that I don’t like outsourcing or leaving everything to H – I like interacting with my kids, and my passion for work turned into “just a job”.

      I’m doing ok for myself, but I am not super amazing awesome career ladder climber/glass ceiling buster like I thought I would be. And I’m generally ok with that, and trying to define myself outside of just my job title. Very glad I didn’t take on crazy debt for this career path like I almost did – then I would be stuck with golden handcuffs and no way out.

    10. 13-year old me thought I would have a big house, fulfilling job saving the world as a lawyer, a group of close-knit BFFs who would come over for sleepovers with expensive wine and cheap takeout, and a husband and kid by 30. I’m in biglaw and feeling undervalued but paid more than I thought I would be, have FAR more law school debt than I imagined, own a modest townhouse, don’t have the friends I thought I would, drink cheap wine to go with my cheap takeout, am far heavier than I thought I would be (see wine and takeout), and I’m with a guy who’s dragging his feet on committing to me, which is probably a good thing because godonlyknows when he would be ready for kids if it’s taking him this long to be ready for marriage.

      1. This sounds exactly like me (excpet for the guy, I’m single). If your in DC, I woudl love to come to your house for a sleepover with cheep wine and cheap takeout.

    11. well, when I was 13 or 14 I thought I would probably already be a Supreme Court justice or something by 27 – and certainly not married – I was going to be Ms. Super Influential and Powerful Career Woman.

      My more realistic plans – when I was maybe 18 or 19? Pretty close – I’m happily married, expecting our first child, halfway through law school with a job I’m excited about lined up for afterwards, have done some cool travel and had some wacky jobs, am still close with several friends from college . . . I did think I’d be a little more RBG instead of trying to limit my law school responsibilities, and probably thought I’d have more friends – but I didn’t anticipate how difficult it can be to make friends as an adult.

      1. Oh my gosh YES on how difficult it can be to make friends as an adult.

        I think I’ve made one new non-work friend since I turned 25. I have lots of more-than-passing-acquaintances, but it seems nearly impossible to make the jump from “Sue, who I chat with every Sunday before yoga” to “Sue, who I grab lunch with after yoga.” Maybe it’s the suburbs, or my particular suburbs, or me in particular, or just plain life, but friends-making is hard, yo.

        1. This. Totally this. I have been blaming it on the fact that I am a working mom in a weird throwback suburb where very few moms work. But maybe it is universal.

          1. I don’t have kids and can say it is also very hard. I think it’s just one of those things that happens when you try and cram a life in the few hours outside of work.

          2. I think its hard to cram in time to try to make new friends as an adult who is also working full time. And then you add in kids, and their activities, and finding sitters and it gets harder. I really would like to magically move to a cul de sac where the friendly neighbors all pop by all the time to chat while our kids happily play in the yard.

      2. I think having kids gives you a new window to making adult friends, it’s like taking up a new hobby or something, where there are also lots of other people who are newly starting the same hobby :).

        1. I hope this is true – I could use a few more friends at a similar life stage. But I’m not sure where the time will come from – right after having the baby I’ll go back to finish law school and then the bar and then biglaw, so any parent-friend-making is going to be up to my husband, a super introvert.

    12. Ugh, wrote a long thing and it wouldn’t post. So the short version follows.

      I never really had a life plan, just general ambitions and aspirations, but if you asked my teenage self, 33-year-old Elle would be a partner in a law firm, married and living in a luxury penthouse somewhere.

      I’m an associate in a law firm, about 3-4 years off partnership (because I didn’t go straight to law school after college) and I’m not sure if I even want to make partner. I’m not married or even close to it – I was single for most of my twenties and all of my thirties and was not really looking to meet anyone. Recently (and totally out of the blue) I got together with someone I’ve known peripherally for the last decade and the new guy looks like it could be serious. I definitely don’t have anywhere near as much money as I thought, I still have student debt and home ownership is probably five year plus plan unless it works out with a guy and we pool our resources. I didn’t want kids when I was younger and I don’t want them now, so that hasn’t changed.

      When I was younger I felt like 33 was Really Old, but I don’t really feel like that now, and you realise that things change as you grow up and you learn about yourself and what you enjoy doing and what is important to you.

    13. +1 for all previous posters who thought their lives would be grander (full of expensive wines and a jet setting life)

      I’m on track and not at the same time :) I am a very Follow the Plan kind of person. I was very on track until about 5 years ago, but due to some health issues, I got off the track and I’m now rather behind on my plan. I’m back on the track, but I’m about three stops behind where I thought I would be in my mid-twenties. Some days I’m OK with that, other days, I get depressed. But then I think about where I am health-wise now and I am grateful. It’s easy to slip into taking health for granted, but I try to remind myself of my previous problems and tell myself it’s OK to be behind as long as I have my health. It works about 80% of the time :)

    14. This is an interesting question that I’ve actually been struggling with in the last year or so. By this time, I thought I’d be married with a kid and be a busy lawyer. Only the second part of that has worked out and I’ve really been struggling with the idea over the last couple years that the marriage part of my life hasn’t worked out yet and the timelines that I (and my parents) had for my life don’t seem to be working out.

    15. I wanted to be a long-haul truck driver when I was a kid. I went to law school instead. I wish I had gone with my original plan. Or gone to mortuary school, which I briefly thought about too.

      I ended up as a sports marketing major in college and worked in sports, then turned 25 and got a wild hair up my a$$ (aka I was broke) and decided law school sounded good. Two years at a law firm, two years in gov’t practice, two years bouncing around trying to figure out wtf to do with my life, another year in real estate, and now I am trying to work as a contracts analyst at a worldwide electronics company. So uh, I would never in a million years have guessed this is how my life would turn out, but I am not upset about it. I am really happy and enjoying my life right now. The one thing I set out to accomplish was to own a home by the time I was 30 and I did that. :)

    16. At 30, my life is starting to look like what I pictured, but I would not have said the same thing 2 years ago at all. 14-year old me would have said 30-year old me would be a successful professional, living in a big city, with a great boyfriend/husband. And that’s what my life looks like now, but I pretty much pinch myself daily because I don’t believe it’s real sometimes. It took a long while to find my professional footing after graduating into the Great Recession and I’ve only recently started to feel like I’m actually getting where I want in my career. Also, my 20s were pretty much a string of bad dates, but I’ve finally met the right guy and we’re very happy and heading towards marriage/family.

      I’m definitely with everyone who has talked about the difficulties of making adult friends, though. I have much-loved close friends but at this point none of them live in my city, and I feel like I have to go on a trip to have a social life, which isn’t easy. Plus I work long hours, which just makes it harder. I wish we had some kind of Corporette friend-match or something!

    17. My profession didn’t even exist when I was a kid. I figured I’d be a professor or a scientist when I grew up; instead I’m designing software. I never thought I’d live in Los Angeles, EVER, until it happened. I assumed I would be with a brainy, successful, nerdy guy, but I also assumed we’d have kids. The guy is here, yay, but the desire for children was gone by age 22.

      So, the parts I never imagined I’m fine with, and the parts I had imagined that didn’t come to pass, I’m fine with too. More than fine with.

      1. I recently realized that if I have checked off MANY of the checkboxes I set out for myself when I was young, maybe 15. (I am late 30s.) What I do, how much I love it, check. Moneywise, how much I make/have, check. Family life, check. I know that I am very lucky.

        And yet it’s all different. There is still drudgery and there could always be more money and less crazy and there is always rain on my parade — and it’s a struggle to say YES, this is success, and it is life, and keep going forward and dreaming, but accept that drudgery and crap is part of it.

        Oh: and I didn’t accomplish ANY of it the way I thought I would. I made many many other plans along the way, some of which I accomplished and some of which I failed to, but somehow found my way back to what I would have wanted to be doing when I was 15. So go figure.

  11. I know we’ve discussed junior associate lateralling recently, but I think my situation is slightly different.

    I’m about a year and a half in, I like my practice area and the people that I work with and I’m getting good training (not fabulous, but it could certainly be worse). Although I work long hours in our busiest times, I believe that my workload is very reasonable (if anything, I feel like I could be assigned more) and my office culture is very compatible with having a life outside of work. The biggest catch is that I don’t love my location. I don’t fit in with the overall culture and don’t believe I want to make permanent roots here.

    I have a few opportunities in the pipeline at extremely reputable firms in a more desirable location that I believe are an overall “step up,” at least as far as I can tell in the grand scheme of things. Is it completely stupid to leave a good situation to chance it, purely because of location? I see both the pros and cons.

    Also, is there enough of an “adjustment cost” for lack of a better term associated with switching firms where it’s tougher than it’s worth at such a junior level? I think about how long it’s taken me to really get my bearings and know our precedent documents and start to recognize patterns in our practice, and I guess I worry that starting from scratch would be so difficult, but I’m unsure if I’m just nervous and overthinking it.

    I’m sure a lot of junior associates would agree with me that sometimes the trickiest thing about evaluating our situations is trying to decipher between things that are characteristic to our firm/city/office in particular and things that are just the nature of the practice of law and will follow us anywhere.

    Any and all advice appreciated!

    1. For me that calculus depends on why you want to relocate. Family ties, friends, yes move it’s worth it. Portland always sounds cool/weather here sucks- I might wait a while longer. At 1.5 years of practice you still have a lot to learn and what you want from your career will probably change. I’d save a move for a time with more certainty.

    2. Are you looking at Portland, Oregon? I am a bit confused by Anonymous’ post at 12:44 pm. If so, I have lots of thoughts.

      I moved as a junior associate. It took a bit of time to reacclimate, but I don’t think there was any adjustment cost. In part, that’s because I moved specifically knowing that I would be getting more responsibility and more senior tasks at my new position.

      My general view is that if you are being recruited, or otherwise have opportunities presented to you, that you would consider a step up in your career, you should jump at them. Even if it’s earlier than expected. You don’t know if those opportunities are going to be there when you’re finally ready to move. But that’s general advice, and will definitely vary based on your individual situation.

  13. Hi all – thought I would ask for some evening wear advice. My company is HQ’d in France, and is hosting a “gala & dinner” in Miami in mid-April. This will be part of a 4 day offsite where all senior leaders will be attending. Do you have any advice on what I can wear? I’m new to the company and based in the US, so I need figure out who to ask internally for wardrobe advice. Also, there are very few women in the company, so I might need to take my cues from men and also what the French might wear. At work, it’s a business casual to slightly business formal dress code (not full on business formal, except for the CEO or for major meetings). Thanks everyone!

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