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Updated: Nov 1, 2018 134 Comments · by

Splurge Monday’s TPS Report: Beasley Fit & Flare Dress

The Personal Shopper (TPS)

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Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. Burch Beasley Flare DressOoooh: purty. I like the seamed panels and texture on this black Tory Burch dress, as well as the ladylike length and neckline. What a great example of a fit and flare dress! (Click here for our last roundup.) It's $450 at Nordstrom, sizes XS-L. Tory Burch ‘Beasley' Fit & Flare Dress Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com. Psst: here's a less expensive option and a plus-size option. Another deal alert ('tis the season, I guess): Bare Necessities has a great sale on some of my favorite brands like Fantasie, Freya, Panache, Le Mystere — 40% off plus an extra 15% off with code EXTRA15. Also, panties starting at $6.99. (Here was our last discussion on the best lingerie brands and styles — readers, any favorites in the sale today?)

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Comments

  2. AN

    Maybe I just don’t do well with this style of dress, but it comes off as ” little girl ” to me, but for the black colour.

    • Stupid question

      I think this particular one looks nice and doesn’t read as little girl to me. I agree with you on many of them though. I tried one on this weekend and confirmed to myself that the style is not flattering on me at all. It made me look much larger.

    • Bonnie

      The flare on this one doesn’t seem as dramatic as on some fit and flares. I’ve been consistently disappointed by Tory Burch though. There are some great designs in the line but I don’t think the quality is worth the price tag.

      • Anononon

        I’m a pear, and hate how fit and flare looks on me. A-line and fit and flare just accentuates my hips. Maybe it varies depending on proportion (and clearly personal preference..).

      • In the Pink

        Actually, I am an hourglass and fit/flare is the best shape for my figure. I’m actually an extreme one though, having a very small waist. That might make the difference.

  4. TXLawyer

    Can we talk about underarms?

    I know it’s a “know your office” kind of thing, but do y’all routinely wear sleeveless dresses/tops to the office without layering a blazer/jacket/cardigan over top?

    Also, what is the secret to “Cowboys cheerleaders” flawless underarms?

    • Diana Barry

      Not really. My office is always freezing and I keep my jacket on. If I go to a work event I will wear a sheath dress, but those are often cold too, so….jacket.

    • kc

      I’ll wear cap sleeves, but not sleeveless. And if you want flawless underarms you probably need to get laser/electrolisis so you don’t have any hair and then use a deodorant with moisturizer (like Dove)

    • MJ

      My first few jobs out of college were really formal (true business formal), and I learned then not to show very much skin at work. I’m cool with leg, but there’s something inappropriate in a true business setting about seeing others’ arms. So, no, my arms don’t show at work. But I’m not crazy–like if I go out to work with colleagues and it’s hot out, I would take my jacket off. But not in a meeting. And I generally don’t wear sleeveless things to work for this very reason.

    • mascot

      I generally keep arms covered at work, although I will take off the blazer for lunch or in my own office. I guess I have decent underarms? I think it is more hair type/skin type than anything else. I have fine dark hair and not very much of it under my arms. So just regular shaving and moisturizing keep it looking ok. I’ve heard that exfoliation can help with skin discoloration.

    • Lyssa

      I will, but I feel awkward about it, so it’s limited – usually just at my desk or on a quick run to the bathroom or kitchen. I would definitely add a layer for a meeting, and usually feel odd if someone comes into my office while I’m not wearing something else. That said, I’m usually cold, so I usually need something else anyway.

      So, I would definitely have something handy, but I think it’s fine to take it off and show shoulders for most office-time (not big meetings or client meetings, though).

    • Anonymous

      I wear sleeveless tops to work- most people do here. My secret to flawless underarms is that since I’m not a cheerleader on a jumbotron, no one is staring at my underarms in high def so I don’t need to care.

    • Bonnie

      I do routinely but have a few jackets in my office in case I need to go to court or to a meeting. I’ll probably only wear sleeveless dresses and shirts for the next week because I want to use my summer clothing before it gets too cold! As for the underarms, I lasered so don’t worry about it.

    • (Former) Clueless Summer

      I do not wear sleeveless most of the year as it’s not technically allowed in our dress code, although people often walk around our floor (non-client floor) sleeveless in the summer.

      One thing that dramatically improved the look of my underarms was using natural (specifically la vanilla) deodorant. However…the smell stopping capability varies by person and it’s not something I can use in the summer, but some people can! When I use that deodorant, my underarms are super smooth and uniform in colour. Also no aluminum!

      • Equity's Darling

        Same here re: natural deodorant and smooth/uniform underams.

        I really like the one made by the Rocky Mountain Soap Company. I tried a bunch- Toms, the one made by Clean, La Vanila, and none of them really worked well for me. The Rocky Mountain Soap Company one is unscented and works really well. I’m lucky enough that I can use it all year, though it’s usually not super hot here.

    • Reix

      I do wear sleeveless, although I prefer short sleeves to protect my blazers from getting stinky if I sweat.

      Sleeveless, yes. Strappy, no. So I don’t think my underarm is very visible if I am sitting at my computer, taking notes, etc.

      I don’t know about flawless, though. I just get regular waxing to remove my hair.

    • AN

      Yes. But I make sure the sleeveless dresses are very classic…think solid colour sheath dresses. And my office is biz casual and in the tropics. Plus I am probably the most conservatively dressed woman, despite the sleeveless dresses!

    • Sparrow

      My office is very casual – for example, I’ve seen men in other departements wearing shorts and sneakers in the summer. Sleeveless tops are not out of the norm. I do wear them, but since I get cold easily I usually wear cardigan. I have dark skin and black hair and I think just the way my skin is pigmented, I’ve never been able to a completely smooth look under my arms. A friend with similar coloring told me that waxing helped, but I haven’t tried that. It doesn’t really bother me because I don’t show my underarms very often.

    • Away Game

      My office is too cold in every season to go sleeveless even if I wanted to, but I think it’s inappropriate for my particular workplace anyway. I’m wearing a sheath dress that is sleeveless, but under its matching blazer, which I don’t intend to take off at any point today.

    • Orangerie

      Nope, I always either wear a sleeved dress or top or a blazer. My office is formal, though… and usually quite chilly.

    • Anon

      I think the answer to this is regional and industry/office based. I’m in San Francisco, conservative-ish industry but sleeveless would be fine in my office except it’s always cold here so you rarely see it.

    • hoola hoopa

      Sleeves in an office setting for me. I do count cap sleeves as sleeves, though. I started my career in conservative offices (banking, health care) where it was mandated by dress code, but I’ve worked in casual offices for many years and keep it up because it feels right to me.

      I will go sleeveless at my desk for short periods if I get hot (climate controlled office – rarely happens) and frequently did it in an office that was not climate controlled and got super hot in summer. I kept a light cardigan on hand for whenever I left my office.

      A couple of younger employees wear one-shoulder and strapless tops. I realized that I’m a bit uptight and think wide strap sleeveless is fine in a casual office, but that’s going way too far for an office. We have no dress code, so I don’t say anything but I’m definitely questioning their choice.

  5. Lawyer problems

    I work at a firm (mid level associate) where I don’t respect the partners in my practice area. I don’t think they manage their files well, they are disorganized, don’t respond to emails, miss deadlines, push work down to junior associates that barely know what they’re doing and then they don’t review the work or give any input. The way they conduct their practice goes against everything I believe in (trying hard, doing a good job for your client, being responsive, making sure work is done well, etc.) It also causes me significant stress to work with them and it taking a toll on my health/sanity. There are lawyers at my firm that I respect and that I think are awesome lawyers who take their jobs seriously, but I (unfortunately) don’t work in those areas. I’m pretty sure I need to quit and go to another firm where hopefully things are different, but before I do that is there anything I can do to improve my situation now? I guess I can’t really talk to anyone about this? Realistically I can’t change my practice area. Please please please don’t say “get used to it, this is how it is everywhere.” I will die.

    • anon

      No help, but I’m on my second firm where that happens. Maybe it’s par for the course? I’m now trying to go in house or maybe even back to engineering.

      • Burgher

        You started out in engineering and went into law? I have an engineering background (though, not a PE) and work in general contracting and have thought of eventually (5+ years ahead) pursuing construction law, as I genuinely enjoy dealing with contracts, negotiations, and that side of things that all my colleagues want nothing to do with. I’d welcome any advice or warnings to just stay away!

        • anon

          What type of engineering? Electrical, computer, and software has lots of options, bio or chemical with PhD do as well. Others it depends. One thing, I’m in patents and not as happy as I expected. I just applied for a job looking for someone with a law degree and computer science degree for negotiating tech contracts and other relevant deals. I really really hope it works out. More business oriented, so I think I’ll like it more.

          • Mpls

            Look into regulatory work. Someone who can speak the science and the law could be of value.

          • anon

            Thanks, Mpls. The in house job is with a medical field company (probably outing myself, lol.) They want someone with 10+ years experience for the regulatory job, and with good reason given recent guidelines about medical related software. But it would be interesting and could be a good transition later in my career. I just want to get my foot in the door.

    • Denveranon

      There are lots of lawyers out there doing good, respectable work. One reason I love my current firm so much is that I really, really, respect the partners I work for, and I know they are doing the best work in their field and getting the best possible results for every client. You can find someplace better. If you want to stay in the same practice area, can you network with people at other firms who are doing good work in your area?

    • Maddie Ross

      Are you in litigation? And the attorneys you think handle files well in corporate/real estate or some other transactional practice? I ask because I wonder if it’s the pace of litigation that is problematic for you and the pace of another practice area – which I know has fire drills, but fewer fire drills than litigation – might be a better fit.

      • Lawyer problems

        No, actually the opposite, the transactional lawyers are the irresponsible ones and the litigation lawyers are on top of things.

        • anon

          Maybe it depends on the firm. I’m in litigation and we missed a statutory bar. I nearly puked I was so anxious over it.

    • MJ

      It is not like this everywhere, but there are a lot of lawyers that are horrid at organization, mentoring, etc. I would honestly figure out exactly how long you need to stay and get a good reference. Then I would talk with friends at other firms and figure out if they like their supervising attorneys/partners and figure out the best way to lateral. I also feel like this is a great lesson in how not to be later….

    • Bonnie

      For the time being, remember that you can’t change the way they are. I’d recommend keeping a good record of your projects so if something does go to ish, you will have cover.

    • A Clark

      Are you me? I’ve known this for a while for myself but market/actually a good place to work despite those specific problems has kept me from moving. I vow to myself that I’m gonna look. Every. Day. I have to believe it’s not like this everywhere or I would be very sad. I am pursuing Maddie Ross’s suggestion as well.

      • Lawyer problems

        I feel bad for you (and me) but it does make me feel somewhat better that I’m not alone.

    • anon

      I read an interesting law 360 article about dealing with a difficult partner. Published today, I think. It has several ideas.

    • Anonymous

      I’m in accounting, not law but this happened to me. I had been in tax for 2 years and they thought I was so fabulous that no one needed to review my work! No one is that fabulous! Partners should have their work reviewed. I moved to a different firm that was exactly the opposite – they reviewed literally everything I did. When I got annoyed with the Type A “can you please find this $1 rounding difference” I reminded myself that this is what I signed up for. I was so happy that people were looking at my work and telling me where I went wrong. You can’t learn as effectively if no one is reviewing your work.

      It’s not like this everywhere, trust me.

    • Kensington

      I know the feeling! I just left a disorganized firm. My new firm is so much better.

      My advice:

      – switch firms
      – use this as a chance to get hyper organized yourself so you can transition easily into your next firm
      – take ownership of deadlines. I used to remind a certain partner about deadline. It made me stay on top of things, which has made me a better lawyer

    • Brunette Elle Woods

      This sounds exactly like my firm!!! No advice, other than encouragement to find another job! I know it is easier said than done!

  6. Anon for this

    So I need to vent ladies. I’m turning 27 soon and this weekend started freaking out about it. Objectively, I know that 27 is still relatively young but I can’t help but feel there were all these things I wanted by now and I’m nowhere close. I have a great job and I’m building my career and I’m trying to remind myself of that. But (and more pathetically), I always thought I would be married and on my way to having a family by now and that’s not even on the radar it seems. The ex that I thought I would marry broke up with me about a year and a half ago and he’s now married and I haven’t even been able to find someone I’m willing to go out with more than a few times. I don’t know how to quiet these thoughts that tell me I’m essentially a failure in that department and that maybe I’m just destined to be single and I hate myself for obsessing over my single status rather than appreciating the great things I do have but I can’t seem to help it.

    • Anonymous

      So, my response to people (ahem Carolyn Hax) who argue that you need to be totes content with a single life is a big fat screw you. I think it’s fine to want marriage and to be disappointed you aren’t there yet.

      But girl you are 26! Why are you borrowing trouble? Are you always an obsessive perfectionist? It’s ine thing to want to not be single and make room in your life for dating etc but there is zero reason to be freaking out at 26 that you’re a failure and destined to be single. (Also, don’t round up your age! You can worry about being 27 when you actually are). It’s hard to tell if you are exaggerating or not. If you’re pretty much ok and just sad sometimes, read Finding Your Other Half Orange, buy a new bra, and carry on. If your negative thoughts are really becoming a problem go see a therapist. Not because you need help finding a man. But because you need help with learning better self care strategies.

      People who are failures at life at 26 include serial killers, rapists, and men who take up too much room on the subway. Not single gainfully employed women.

      • anon

        +1. I’m 26, almost 27, and almost everyone I know (especially my friends who have been particularly successful in their careers) is single. This is not to trivialize your feelings, but I think where you are is the new normal.

        • anon

          My guess is geography plays a role in this. I’m in the South and almost 28. Almost all of my friends are married or in serious long term relationships.

          • anon

            Midwest and all my high school friends are married; all female college friends are married and a handful of male college friends are still single.

          • Anononon

            Northeast, I’ll be 30 in less than 30 days. I’m married, and I’m in the minority. Husband’s from ATL (same age) and his friends are married, have kids, and even two divorces.

          • Anonymous

            Yep. I’m the 29 year old Anon below, and everyone my age in my Southern town got married several years ago or are in serious cohabitating relationships. I can’t even find friends to go out with to meet new people because everyone wants to stay home and have dinner and crafting parties. Tried dating someone a few years younger than me and he was wonderful and fun, but he freaked out thinking that I was looking for something more serious than he was ready for (which wasn’t even the case–I was fine with just having fun and getting to know each other). We talked about regrouping down the road, but by then I think he’ll be freaked out that my age starts with a “3”.

            Add in that I just found out my dad has a terminal illness, and I’m pretty down in the dumps that he won’t get to walk me down the aisle or celebrate the birth of his grandchild. I know I’m luck that I’ve gotten longer than some people, but it is definitely exacerbating the 30-anxiety.

          • Hildegarde

            Anonymous at 11:20, I’m really sorry about your dad. Those are really hard thoughts to deal with. A very close friend of mine, who has been like a second father to me for years (still not the same as a father, I realize), was diagnosed with a terminal illness this year, and it has been awful. I hope you and your dad can make the most of the time you have left.

          • Type A

            I’m in the DMV area, and the vast majority of married women with children are much older. When I went for my preschool visit, I would say most were late 30’s to early 40’s. Very rare to find a married mom in her 20’s…at least where I live. I didn’t get married until I was 34. I am happy about that. I was able to be selfish and have a lot of fun!!

        • KittyKat

          Seriously no bigger pet peeve. Just because my behind doesn’t occupy a full seat does not mean you can have the rest.

    • Anonymous

      I’m you, but at 29 (30 is a few short weeks away and I have a lot of anxiety about it for all the reasons you mention). It sucks.

      • Ellen

        Yay! Pricey Monday’s! I love Pricey Monday’s and this Tory Burch Dress! Kat, you must be readeing my mind b/c I have been looking for a nice black dress, and Rosa can pick this up at Nordstrom’s for me. I can ALWAYS return it as long as I do NOT take the tag’s off. YAY!!! PS: The sleevless thing is something I have to get over– Frank is alway’s trying to peer in to see my boobies, but these look pretty tight so he would NOT get to see much. FOOEY on Frank! He can alway’s look at his wife’s boobie’s over the weekend!

        As for the OP, hug’s — I am over 33 and am in the same boat. Lot’s of guy’s but NOT marrage minded. Sex minded? Yes, they alway’s are willing to huff and puff, but NOT marry me. I can NOT have kid’s w/o a husband unless I freese my EGG’s, so that is looking like an option for me if a guy is NOT willeing to marry me. I will have to find a guy to impregnate my egg’s but for now, I am NOT interested in guy’s who just want to get my clothe’s off and then dirty up my sheet’s and then go home. I had enough of that with Mr. Sheketovits, thank you very much.

        Myrna and I went to the Climate Change march, but did NOT find eligible men. Many men, but all were in the group that just wanted sex. 2 guys came up to us and said we should be worried about the future and therefore to live life to it’s fullest today (meaning go w/them to their apartement for sex). We said we were for the cause of climate change, but did NOT want to make it worse by having them get all sweatey with all the extra huffeing and puffeing they would have to be doeing with us. Some guy’s have a lot of NERVE! FOOEY!

        I have 6 cases with brief’s due today, so I will be VERY busy. Mason keep’s hanging around Lynn instead of working. I am goeing to tell the manageing partner to shoo him away from Lynn b/c I know he is sleepeing with her most night’s anyway. FOOEY!

      • A Clark

        If it makes you feel any better, the anxiety at 29 goes away once you’re 30. :o) Seriously.

        • rachelellen

          +100. Gets easier every year. This does not mean I am not going to be freaking out here about 40, which is coming up in …. oh sheesh.

        • Anonymous

          YES! This was totally me! I cried on my 29th birthday but by the time 30 actually came around I had come to terms with it.

        • Senior Attorney

          And when you are 5 days away from 56, with two divorces behind you, you will read threads like this and shake your head and smile benevolently… ;)

        • ParalegalNC

          I found that 28 was roughest for me, with smooth sailing through 30-32.

    • roses

      How many guys have you gone out with that you can’t stand to go on more than a few dates with? Because if it’s a ton, and you haven’t had any success at all, I think it’s a sign that you need to change up your approach for looking. If you’re doing the online dating thing, take a hard look at both your own profile and your heuristics for screening guys to see if there’s a mismatch between what you’re projecting to others and/or screening for and what kind of guy and relationship you want. If you’re doing in-person only, try online, or try going to new places or events to meet people. It’s totally fine to have not met *the one* yet, but if it’s this important to you, you should make sure you’re evaluating your approach instead of doing the same thing over and over.

      • 2 Cents

        This was happening to me. I was being matched with guys who were all outdoorsy and waaay to alpha male for me. I took a break from online dating. When I went back to it, I’d had a few glasses of wine first. My most honest friend (the one who doesn’t sugar coat anything) helped me fill out the application (and by “helped,” I mean she took the computer from my hands and asked me questions only periodically). When it came to “How outdoorsy are you?” I said “7.” She was like “Um, going from your apartment to the subway doesn’t count. Let’s say a ‘3,’ since you like drinking wine at restaurants with outdoor patios.” We did the entire profile this way. She helped me be way more picky/selective, narrow down what was truly important to me, and that helped me get better dates. 6 months later, I went on the awkward first date with the guy who’d become my husband — and who also considered the “outdoors” to be a choice in restaurant seating.

        • Skeptic

          Totally agree with this. Make sure you are actually selecting the guys you want to be with. Once I realized that I wanted to date jerks but I wanted to settle down with a nice man, I gave the nice men a chance and dumped the jerks. Nice man and I are now married going on 2 years. :)

    • Anonymous

      I turned 27 a few months ago, and I’m in the exact same position. I have a job I love that pays well and is on track for future goals. And I recently bought my first condo. But, as my mother so helpfully likes to remind me, I should be married.

      • AIMS

        I wonder if this is regional. I feel like I didn’t start regularly going to weddings for my friends until 28/29, with *some* weddings at 27 that we all kind of considered to be a big deal since the people were “still so young” and most weddings later than that. I only have two friends who got married younger than 27 (at 25) and those were widely considered a) cultural and b) a terrible decision (at least for one of them). Both early marriages, btw, are in the midst of divorce now that my friends are 33.

        And, on a related note, if you went to grad school/med school/law school/etc., I feel like your life was sort of put on hold for an extra 3-5 years, so if that’s your situation, I wouldn’t compare myself to friends who just did college and then began their careers at 22/23. When my mom gives me a hard time (gently) about not giving her grandbabies, I tell her she shouldn’t have pushed me to go to law school if she wanted them right away.

    • Jordan

      You are NOT a failure. Sorry for the Ellen caps. You are not a cookie cutter, you are a unique snowflake.

      I am you at 32. I think I felt the same way then too but it was more constant. It’s decreased over time but comes in heavy spurts. I know for sure that I dodged several bullets by NOT marrying the guys I was dating from 21-31 (6 years with a closeted gay, 3 years with a guy who loved me but I didn’t love him/bad match, 1 year sociopath cheater). But I still get intense feelings of failure (PMS/baby showers/too much Facebook). Then, I have spent the last year like you, dating around, generally disappointed.

      But, I keep dating and trying. I went to therapy a couple of times last year and worked on myself but was told I am normal (totally worth the money let me tell you). When it gets bad, I talk to my married friends. I let them vent and ask what they wish they could do if they had more time, then steal their ideas that I like and do them myself. It helps to hear them say they are jealous that I get to do anything I want even though I tell them that I am jealous of everything they have. Then we laugh and share stories about how I fell off of my bike twice during my last date and how her baby had a poop-explosion at the grocery while she had a full cart and she had to leave it to clean up and when she came back the cart was gone and put away.

      You have to just focus on making yourself the most incredible catch you can because how can you be a failure if you’re doing everything you can think of to be beautiful and smart and fun? See it that way and not that you are a failure but that you just haven’t found the right one yet. Make a new recipe; do a new workout class; take on a project; watch a marathon of a new show on Netflix with some popcorn; go to happy hour with other single friends.

      But, you are not a failure. You cannot compare yourself to someone else’s journey and you cannot set deadlines for things that involve another person. You have to be happy with what you have. Lots of married women do not and will never be content with their careers.

      Also, here come the “25 year olds who got married” divorces so it could be worse.

      • Anon

        This post right here. Ditto on “dodging a bullet”, it’s easy to feel bad about not being married. But if the alternative was to be married to someone who was a bad match, not worth it. And yeah, there are the 25, 26 or 27 year olds who got married and they are divorced now, and sometimes I wonder whether some of those situations are the result of self inflicted pressure. And maybe women do this to themselves more than men.

      • cbackson

        Married at 26, divorced by 30 here. Trust me, there is no degree of singleness that touches the misery of an unhappy marriage. Honestly, if I hadn’t gotten divorced, I’m not sure that I would be on this earth today.

        • MK

          This. I am single in my early 30s and I know no one sadder and lonelier than my friends in really bad marriages.

      • Unicorn

        “You have to just focus on making yourself the most incredible catch you can because how can you be a failure if you’re doing everything you can think of to be beautiful and smart and fun?”

        Sorry, no. This assumes that you’re a failure if you aren’t “doing your best to catch a man.” Please. You have to focus on making yourself the most incredible person you can, because how can you be a failure if you are living a full life and developing as a person? Don’t focus on “becoming a catch.” Focus on becoming a person who loves her life. The rest falls into place.

        Also? You “ask what they wish they could do if they had more time”? They’re married, not dead.

        • pregomama

          As a married mama, I assume she meant “more free time” and not “time on this earth.” ;)

        • Jordan

          My friends who are married with (smaller) kids have things they miss out on socially. If we are playing grass is greener at least I want to know what’s so green about my side when I am feeling blue.

      • Anonymous

        I must be projecting because no matter how many times I look at it, my brain reads this headline as “Unhappy and Single Awareness Week.”

    • Anon for this

      Not to be morbid, but perhaps there is a letter your dad could write or a video he could film that is only revealed at the wedding. Same goes for the arrival of your future children, if that’s something you’re interested in.

      In a similar boat–35th birthday around the corner in a new city that is supposedly 4th worst for singles

    • Brunette Elle Woods

      I’m 29, single, and I really don’t mind at this point. I’ve known too many men who are just not worth it and being single is so much better than being with one of those guys. I mean they didn’t have their life together, financially, emotionally, etc. Those relationships were a mess! I also have a few friends in their late 30’s/early 40’s who are getting married or having their first child. I’m sure they are thrilled that they waited for this guy to come along rather than settle down with someone who isn’t right for them. Just relax and don’t stress about it, if that’s possible for you! I know it can still be tough.

  7. Bored? Make extra money!

    Hello hive! I recently moved from the big city to a one horse town. I’m bored to pieces. So I’m looking to do something with my evenings to make a little extra cash. Do any of you ladies work a part time of some sort? Maybe online or remote or perhaps at a store? What recommendations can you make for part time work? I’d like to do something that pays wells and could actually boost the ol’ resume. I’m a business woman in health care/health insurance “by day” We’ll see what I end up doing “by night!” ;) I’d love to know what others are up to. Thanks so much!

    • TXLawyer

      What about bartending? It might not be a resume booster for what you do, but you could meet great people, improve your social skills, etc.

      • Kathryn

        +1, or hostessing at a cool bar or restaurant if gaining bartending skills is too complicated. I used to be a hostess and loved the customer interaction (plus, people rarely get mad at the hostess).

        • Bored? Make extra money!

          I’d love to bartend! I should look into that. There aren’t too many bars in this small town but I could take a drive to a larger city and work there perhaps. Thanks TX! I also like the idea of hosting, as it’s a bit more laid back (and yes, people are probably friendlier to hostesses than they are to servers, I’m sure). Thanks Kathryn!

    • Contracts

      What if you taught a night class at a local community college? You won’t make much extra money for the work, but it can be rewarding work. It could also be a resume booster. Do you need to make extra money , or are you looking for social activities? You could always volunteer – being on boards can help you do good in your new community and help you network. What about something like Junior League?

      • Cb

        This is a great idea. I teach an open studies course (so open to the community and no grading) and really enjoy it. The money buys me shoes but I’m in it for the experience.

        • Bored? Make extra money!

          Just checked out my local community college job postings – There are positions for Adjunct Instructors for Graduate Business Education and Instructors for Professional Studies! Bingo! Good call guys! Thanks for the guidance!

    • Shoes

      I used to photograph weddings (so the second camera in weddings with two photographers; the main one ran the company and dealt with the clients). It was hard work and ate my weekends, but it was good to know that I could do it.

      • Bored? Make extra money!

        Wedding photography sounds like fun but also feels like a lot of pressure! I’d worry about not getting any beautiful photos! :( You must be very talented!! Thanks Shoes! :)

    • Meg Murry

      If you are in health care/health insurance, could you look into if there are still being people hired to help people navigate the online insurance marketplaces? Or volunteering at a senior center or community center to help people out with Medicare/Medicaid/insurance sign up questions?
      Also, does being in health insurance mean you know the medical codes? I know people that work from home doing medical transcription and/or coding – they are sent electronic files and do the coding/transcription online. Not sure how much that is available now, since I think a lot of it is now done overseas, but its something to look into.

      Alternately, is there a mall store you might want to work nights and weekends at for the clothes discount? Might be worth it to build up your work wardrobe.

      • Bored? Make extra money!

        I’m trying to avoid retail. The work wardrobe is already terriby extensive! LOL!

        Most days, I’m not even 100% clear on the insurance marketplace, but I probably could be of assistance to most laypeople. Great idea. I’ll look into this. Thanks Meg!

      • S in Chicago

        Doesn’t pay, but do you have an interest in writing? Maybe volunteer to write an article or two for whatever magazine serves the association(s) that cover your profession. I’ve done that a few times and it has opened some speaking doors, too. It built up the resume really fast and was a bit of an ego boost. Not interested in writing? Ask if they need folks for peer review of the articles they receive. Or volunteer to help out at local meetings. Do they need board members or chapter leaders or the like? It’s shocking how much a little bit of time volunteering can pay off and lead to better connections and advancement down the road.

        • Bored? Make extra money!

          This is a great idea, S. I do enjoy writing and I’d like to read the works of others as well. I’ll explore opportunities in this area. Thanks!

      • Bored? Make extra money!

        I just googled Stella and Dot. Looks like fun! I’ll explore this option a bit more, too. Thanks Kelly!

        • Kathryn

          I just have to say that I really appreciate the fact that you thanked every single person who gave you advice.

          • Bored? Make extra money!

            I was gonna thank you for thanking me but I think I accidently hit the report button instead! LOL! – so much for manners Kathryn! :( But thanks anyway!

    • SFO-ist

      Piggy backing on this questions – has anyone gotten a second job to help pay off school loans faster? I keep mulling this over but have yet to pull the trigger.

      Has anyone done this? Any tips on what a good job would be for someone who has limited availability mostly on weekends? I was thinking maybe picking up some retail shifts over the holidays as a way to start.

      • anon

        Babysitting (especially in the Bay Area, at 20+/hr, under the table, has been great for me.

        If that isn’t your cuppa tea, and you went to Grad School, the best bang for your buck is to teach Test Prep classes, if your scores were high enough. 30-80/hr, as far as I know (but I’ve never done it). This could be confided to weekends, for sure.

      • Brit

        I started doing some secret shopping through Sinclair Customer Metrics – I go buy a soft pretzel at Auntie Anne’s or something at Pottery Barn/Williams Sonoma and they give you like $8 a visit. I do it on my own time and I get a free stuff (as long as it’s under their reimbursement cost for the store). They have a time frame for when each stop is available, but it’s usually 4-7 days you can choose from. It’s not much, but it’s a little something extra.

  9. purplesneakers

    I have a bit of a tipping dilemma.

    So I know that you generally tip the people doing your pedicure. But this time around I’m considering a ‘medical pedicure’- done by qualified medical professionals, in a podiatrist’s office. Do I still tip? I’m asking because I wouldn’t tip my doctor, and this facility is very much set up as a ‘let us take care of your health’ place versus a ‘let us pretty up your tootsies’ kind of place.

    I’m not actually from a country where tipping salon people is a thing, so I don’t want to come across as offensive or cheap. Help!

    • Carrie

      Absolutely not. Do not tip in a doctor’s office/medical professional’s office. It doesn’t matter that you are working with a tech/nursing assistant etc..

      They are paid a lot more per hour than the woman in the salon, including benefits, so a tip is additionally not warranted.

    • Orangerie

      I would say if the office takes insurance, you don’t need to tip. Never heard of a medical pedicure; I am intrigued!

      • purplesneakers

        I hadn’t heard of one before either before moving to where I am! Basically, it’s for people who have difficult feet/health conditions like diabetes/something else that makes a salon procedure a bit of a dicey proposition. It’s pricier than a regular pedi ($75 vs the $30-50 I’ve been seeing at regular places, I live in an expensive town) but I’m diabetic so I’m happy to pay for lowered chances of things going wrong.

        • Carrie

          Just a quick warning…. my father has had the podiatry office “pedicures”…. they are nothing like what you get in a salon. Unless you are going to an unusual place, that is NOT a typical medical office. Ask them what the service entails, and be prepared for a disappointment.

          Basically it means they carefully… but quickly…. cut your toenails and assess the skin for breaks, early pressure sores, fungus etc… But it is not a skin care treatment with carefully cut/filed/painted nails. Honestly, I could do better than my father gets, and in the end we stopped them because it wasn’t worth the time… even though his insurance covered it.

          The people who get this are primarily elderly, people with mobility difficulties who have difficulty doing self care of the feet and who are more at risk because of diabetes etc… Not someone young like you.

          And please do not offer the person a tip. It is actually unethical in this setting and could unintentionally get the employee into trouble if they were tempted to take it and you “told”….

    • Erisa

      Can you call the receptionist and ask if it is customary? I worked as a server for years and I still wouldn’t know whether tipping would be appropriate in that situation.

    • Jordan

      When I got a facial in the derm office I did not leave a tip because it didn’t seem appropriate. Facial at the salon/spa, tip. I would say no unless offered an envelope for tip or something similar.

  10. Lyft/Uber for commute?

    This is primarily for SF – e t t e s, but anyone in a big city may have perspective. I’m changing jobs to a much longer commute. I’m in the ‘burbs (sort of, East Bay city in its own right), and the job is in SF. Unfortunately, it’s not walking distance from BART which would be my natural commute otherwise. I was thinking of just working weird hours to avoid bridge traffic, but it also occurred to me that it might be workable to use Lyft/Uber on a regular basis to get to work from the BART station.

    Has anyone done this? Is it reliable? Crazy expensive? I know that some people in NYC commute daily by cab, but it’s a foreign concept to me.

    • F in SF

      from the east bay to the city we are talking between 30 to 60 each way (depending on traffic). that seems pretty pricey and you’d still be stuck in traffic. have you considered driving or biking from home to your bart station?

      • Lyft/Uber for commute?

        I’m thinking of using Lyft in SF to/from the BART station (i.e. just a couple of miles).

        • F in SF

          ah, i misread. that makes a lot of sense. it’ll probably be not too expensive, but it also depends on which parts of the city. also worth considering would be bike share to/from work to bart

    • Kathryn

      This may not work for you for a variety of reasons (and I’m not sure about the BART situation) but could you bike to the BART or all the way to work? From what I’ve experienced of SF weather it seems like it would always be pleasant to bike. Alternatively, you could be one of those people who uses a manual scooter to get to the BART (I secretly admire these people).

      • Lyft/Uber for commute?

        I’ve thought about this, but I live on top of a really steep hill. Also, I think biking to SF will take longer than driving even with traffic. Not sure if you mean biking to BART, but I think you can’t put your bike on BART in the AM. I could bike to/from BART in SF, but I may not want to everyday.

        • Kathryn

          I did forget about the hills when I recommended that. I did mean biking to the BART but can see how it would be difficult to get your bike on (if it’s anything like NYC subways). I suppose there’s no safe location to lock up your bike at the BART station? Either way, that doesn’t fix your steep-hill problem!

          • hoola hoopa

            I live in a different hilly city with a lot of bike commuting. Electric bikes are increasingly common to handle the hills, and major transit stations typically have semi-private/reserved bike lockers. You contact the transit authority to get access to a locker, which you share with a small handful of other bike commuters. While I’ve known a lot of people whose commuter bikes were stolen (typically at the office), I’ve never heard of anyone having a problem with one of these lockers.

        • anonsg

          I think you can bring your bike on BART. I see them every day.

          What about bus to BART?

          Also check out vanpools direct to SF. Check 511.org

    • Anonymous

      This is perhaps highly variable by city, but in mine the UberX availability is iffy outside of evenings and weekend afternoons. Even weekend mornings are tough. We’re in a car-centric city where the primary reason people Uber is to avoid driving after drinking, so the Uber drivers come out of the woodwork to serve the bar-going crowd and weekend brunch/festival-goers. Outside of those times, it can be a really long wait to get a car because the drivers just aren’t out (/I suspect are at their day jobs)

    • Wildkitten

      Beware surge pricing! If it’s like $10 on a normal day it’s probably $50 if it’s raining. I took uber to the courthouse for my bar swearing in and it started drizzle and suddenly I was out $80 instead of like $15.

    • SF Anon

      Sounds crazy expensive to me as a routine thing. I’d consider a folding bike so it’s easy to take on BART (and maybe drive to BART, bike from BART to work), plus maybe Uber/Lyft on rainy/miserable days that you’re not up for the biking. Or depending on how far work is from BART, maybe get some good walking commute shoes and stretch your definition of walking distance…

    • Samantha

      Some places in the East Bay have Casual Carpool set up to certain spots in the city, so that may be worth considering if you haven’t already.

    • Need to Improve

      Can you drive to the BART station and park there? or drive to West Oakland and park there?

    • profmama

      I commute East Bay to SF: what about casual carpool, BART to bus or cable car, or folding bike on BART? Some BART stations also have bike lockers for 5 cents an hour. You could leave your city bike there overnight for less than a dollar/day, and use it only in SF to get to/from your office.

      The main place I see people arriving at their offices via Uber is Twitter (which is, of course, a stone’s throw from a BART station).

      It’s hard for me to imagine any place in downtown/ SOMA that’s not bikeable, or walkable from BART with a pair of comfy shoes.

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