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Updated: Jun 15, 2021 231 Comments · by

Wednesday’s Workwear Report: Lace Yoke Cap Sleeve Top

The Personal Shopper (TPS) |

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A lacy top in a solid color is such a great wardrobe piece for summer. We’ve had discussions about wearing lace to the office in the past, and I agree with Kat — lace can be tricky. I think if you’re trying to decide if a lacy piece is office appropriate, the key questions to ask yourself are 1) Would this be something I would wear to a wedding? and 2) Does it look too much like lingerie? If yes, it's probably not for the office.

This piece is very clearly not for a cocktail party or the boudoir, and I think it would be a great office piece. With the slightly longer back, I would probably wear this untucked over a pair of skinny pants, with a long cardigan or blazer on top.

The top is $108 at Nordstrom and comes in sizes 1X–3X. It also comes in white for $78.

This top from Lucky is available in sizes XS–XXL and is $69.50 at Nordstrom.

Sales of note for 8.30.24

  • Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
  • Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
  • Boden – 20% off
  • Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
  • Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
  • J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
  • Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
  • Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
  • Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
  • White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale

Sales of note for 8.30.24

  • Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
  • Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
  • Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
  • Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
  • Boden – 20% off
  • Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
  • Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
  • J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
  • J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
  • Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
  • Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
  • M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
  • Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
  • Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
  • Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
  • White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale

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About Elizabeth

Elizabeth is a 30-something lawyer living on the East Coast. She spent seven years as a Biglaw associate in NYC, three years as a partner at a medium-sized firm, and is now in-house counsel for a large company. She loves Diet Coke, '90s sitcoms, and dresses with pockets.

Comments

  1. A Plus Fed

    I feel like the button and loop closures on the alternative (Lucky) shirt are designed to show glimpses of skin, particularly the bottom button, so it would make office wear difficult.

    • Anon

      I would always wear a cami with that style, but the neckline on that isn’t suited to a cami.

    • Cat

      I think the Lucky shirt belongs on a teen with high-waisted cutoffs – cute for that look but definitely meant to be casual wear.

    • Anon

      oh I LOVE the Lucky top for casual wear, but agreed – would not wear it to work!

      • Anon

        oh I LOVE the Lucky top for casual wear, but agreed – would not wear it to work!

  2. Anon

    looking to hear about people’s experiences with Invisalign and other similar options (smile direct, byte, etc). I had braces as a kid, wore my retainer as directed (guidance then was just 2 years, most younger people I know have had to wear theirs for longer), and still my teeth have shifted. I had a lot of bite issues that braces fixed, so I just want to fix cosmetic issues.

    I’m less interested in Invisalign because it’s pricey; I know this is an investment but also I’m on a budget.

    Interested in hearing what service you used, how long it took, how much it cost, and how happy you are with the results!

    • Anon

      Following because I am also interested. I’ve heard terrible things about smile direct, but byte sounds more promising (if I don’t go the Invisalign route).

    • Anonymous

      Beware. There is a big lawsuit against Smile Direct for causing injury. I have clear brackets and one small metal wire. It was 1/2 the time and 1/2 the cost of invisalign.

    • AZCPA

      I did Invisalign as an adult (around 30) after braces as a teen, so a very similar situation. I’d been a good retainer wearer for the then-proscribed period.

      Several of my teeth had turned/twisted a little bit, and with Invisalign, they attached tiny clear nubs to those teeth so that the aligner could shift them back into place. With an at-home product that wouldn’t be an option. I had a short course (less than a year) and it was about $2500, though that was nearly 10 years ago and I’m 100% happy. Still wear a retainer on the top now, and have a permanent retainer on the bottom, which I think contributes to the long term satisfaction significantly. That bottom one also wouldn’t be an option with an at-home product.

      So for a very simple case, the at-home versions are likely fine. But I don’t know how you’d assess that without going through the process with an orthodontist.

    • Anon

      All of them loosen and shift your teeth around. I can understand being on a budget, but like Lasik and other things where you only get one, it’s not something to go the budget route on. Go to a cosmetic dentist, figure out the best thing for you (most will do Invisalign) and save up for it. You don’t want to save a few hundred dollars only to purchase a lifetime of problems.

    • Anon

      go to two different orthodontists. i was the same as you. first orthodontist said invisalign. second one said a retainer could do the trick and even still had my old retainers – the top one completely didn’t fit, so I had to get a new one of those, but the bottom one still did and she just adjusted it a bit. i think the whole thing cost $2-300. obviously everyone’s teeth are different, but find an orthodontist who isn’t just trying to sell you the most expensive thing. Both of my consultations were free

      • OP

        oh that’s such a great suggestion. Maybe I’ll go back to my childhood orthodontist! I really don’t think there’s much to be done but I also don’t want to wait too long and have actual problems down the road.

    • Anon

      Similar situation. Braces as a young teen, wore my retainer, stopped and my teeth shifted. I was not even considering Invisalign but I had a permanent retainer on the bottom that needed to be removed. I went to my old orthodontist because my current dentist would not touch it. My ortho was so displeased with how my teeth shifted he offered Invisalign at cost $1,500, plus a few 3 hour drives to his office for a little over a year. I am very pleased with the results three years later. I would absolutely have paid full price and not made the drives.

    • Invisalign

      SO is currently on Invisalign b/c only wore retainer for two years (I’ve worn one every night since my braces got removed!). We went through an orthodontist because of the horror stories and risk of injury is not worth it–losing bone mass, etc.

      If your changes are not severe (SO’s were), you can get Invisalign Lite or Invisalign Express, which is more affordable. Our ortho treatment is on a payment plan that is manageable to us. Don’t skimp here! We researched and found the best ranked Invisalign ortho (with amazing reviews!) in town.

    • KH

      Definitely don’t do Smile Direct. I tried it once, didn’t work, gave them two more chances, still not what I want. I’ll be seeing an actual doctor once time permits.

    • Anonymous

      DH has them now (37) after a palate expander and 3 years of braces as a kid. His front teeth started to cross again and apparently his bite is completely out of whack (“how is it that you can even chew?”). He is six months in and they are great. If he stopped now it would look great but the ortho thinks he needs another 12 months to really get the teeth/bite corrected. We paid $6500 for the entire treatment regardless of how long it takes–the estimate was 18 months but it could be more. He has $2k in ortho coverage so that helped, and we are doing the rest on a payment plan which we are funding through our FSA so it’s not taxed. We calculated it out around $3k of cost to us and it’s worth every penny.

      Some considerations: your eating habits change dramatically. DH has lost 10lbs because you have to take them out and then brush and put them back every time you eat, so he tries not to snack anymore. He also cut out coffee because it was too much of a pain to sip coffee all morning and then deal with the trays. He drinks seltzer not cokes now, too. Also, if you are not diligent about them they don’t work well.

    • Anonymous

      I got Invisalign about 7 years ago. Wore braces at a teen and didn’t continuously wear the retainer. My bite was misaligned such that it chipped my bottom tooth so I really needed to do something but I didn’t want braces. I too got the nubs that another person mentioned. Having to take out the liners to eat and then brush before putting them back really makes you think about what you eat and drink (other than clear liquids) so that was helpful in curbing excess snacking. It look me a bit before I was talking with them without feeling self-conscious — there is a learning curve. The treatment was going to be about 3 years or so but I got a device that vibrates your mouth that speeds up the process. This was sold through my orthodontist and cost an extra $500 — worth it to me. I have been 100% happy with my results. My BF got his through a dentist was not as happy. Go with an orthodontist and do a payment plan if you have to but don’t scrimp on this. I have a permanent bottom retainer and a removable top retainer. I keep my last top tray in my travel bag so I don’t have to remember to pack it. Good luck!

    • Rox

      I’m on week 2 of aligners through Byte at a cost of $1,700. I’m mainly looking to fix a few cosmetic issues, i.e., two bottom front teeth have shifted inwards and upper teeth lean in so looking to widen my smile. Ask again in 2 months and I’ll let you know how everything worked!

    • Sunshine71

      I’m doing Byte now. I have some small overlaps in my front bottom teeth that I would like to correct. I never had braces or any type of orthodontia treatment as a child because none of my alignment issues are very bad.

      The sales process was easy, they were super responsive and everything went faster than they said it would, including delivery of my aligners. I was rolling right along, into week 10 of 16; I had uploaded my progress pictures as required and everything seemed fine, unti I thought that perhaps the aligners weren’t fitting quite as well as they should. I reached out to customer service and – surprise – my teeth weren’t tracking as they should and there were visible “air gaps.”

      Long story short, it took 2 weeks to get help from one of the clinicians and my questions only ever partially answered. Apparently you should never see air gaps and if you do, it’s a sign that you need to go back a step in the aligners and spend more than a week in each set. I had to re-do impressions and I’m now waiting for a new set of aligners to come. My treatment should be done this week if everything had gone according to plan, but now I have no idea how many more weeks I’ll need.

      Byte says this is “common” and not to worry. I’m annoyed at the abysmal customer service and response times. I’m also shocked that no one bothers to review progress photos and that I wasn’t told from the beginning to watch for air gaps.

      Until this is all done, I’m not sure if I would recommend them or not.

    • Anonymous

      I used a “Hawley spring retainer” instead of Invisalign, due to the cost. This may be an option for you. It’s essentially a retainer with springs in it. You have to get it tightened over time, like braces. However, it is removable for meals. It wasn’t too painful (it was a little) and didn’t take as long as Invisalign.

  3. Anon

    Is it okay to wear a dark cognac belt (over a casual dress) with light/nude colored sandals, as long as they both have an orangeish tone to them?

  4. Anon

    I’m struggling in my marriage of two months. We had a rocky engagement, and I don’t think we would’ve gotten married had it not been for COVID. I’m trying to decide whether to file for divorce now and cut my losses, or whether I am struggling adjusting to being married and I should stick this out. I would be interested in hearing feedback on whether having a tough time in a new marriage is typical, and how others adjusted to being married. I’m in therapy now, for what that’s worth.

    • Cat

      Oh, I am sorry to hear this, but I would suggest splitting up now. You are in what should be an easy and joyous phase, barring anything unusual (job loss, illness, etc) and if it’s not good now, it’s unlikely to get better…

      • Anon

        +100. A therapist said this to me years ago regarding about a friend whose marriage was in a bad state after about two months. That was many years ago and, indeed, things keep getting worse. It’s a very sad situation.

    • anon

      I think people are going to need a lot more detail before they can give an opinion.

      • Anon

        +1 – and experiences vary. I’ve heard of plenty of people with rough starts and easy/dreamy starts and everything in between. What’s specifically going on?

    • CountC

      With the caveat that I am a single person who has never been married and likely should not give you any advice at all, it sounds like this is not the right relationship for you! I would get out now before you get farther along.

      I’m sorry. Hugs

    • Anon

      How big an adjustment was marriage for you? By that I mean, did you live together and share finances for prior to marriage or are those issues you are having to grapple with for the first time. Can you explain more about why engagement was rocky? I think we need a bit more context before we can advise properly.

      • Anonymous

        +1 I know so many people who want to flee their marriages and when I ask them about it it’s because they’re adjusting to living together for the first time.

      • SC

        +1. I lived with my now-husband before we got married, and that was a rough adjustment for us. I remember being glad it wasn’t the first year of marriage.

        • Anon

          Same same. We worked out SO many details in our time living together (about a year and a half before we got married) that our first year of marriage was actually very happy, because we weren’t doing so much adjusting.

      • AFT

        +1. The first year of cohabitation was rough for my now-husband and myself, but that happened before we got married.

      • Anon

        Hearing the phrase “rocky engagement” makes me sad, that should be a pretty joyous time for a couple, barring external events.

    • Veronica Mars

      Were you living together before you were married? Were you sharing living expenses and finances? What major changes have occurred between being engaged and married. For some, there is very little in the day to day life that shifts, and for some, it’s a huge adjustment (my partner and I did not live together for religious reasons). The other thing I’ll mention is that engagements can be rocky– this may be the first time in your relationship where you’ve actually had difficult conflict to work through (family dynamics, spending on the wedding, etc). It’s fairly easy for some people to float through 1-2 years of dating without those coming up the way they do during an engagement. So having a tough engagement can be more common than you think. Not knowing any more about your situation, I’d only seriously consider getting divorced or separating immediately if you fear for your safety or deteriorating mental health by staying in the relationship. If it’s more, “this isn’t what I thought it would be like” / you’re unhappy, I’d try couples counseling and try to hang on a little longer.

      • AZCPA

        Yes, all this. I’ve been married 7 months, so also wedded during COVID. But we lived together for nearly two years before then, together four, involved with each other’s families, saw each other through job changes, sick parents, etc. So marriage wasn’t much of a change for us, and if that’s your situation I suspect things won’t get better.

        But if there’s transition, especially if you moved, I’d give it time (also with Veronica’s wise mental health caveat).I’d also suggest making sure you have any harder convos now (like money, if you haven’t really discussed recently) as decision points for the transition.

    • OP

      Thanks, everyone, OP here. I don’t want to write a novel about our experiences, but I’ll try to summarize. He is insecure and is always afraid that I’m not committed to the relationship and will cheat on him. This escalates whenever I spend time with friends and family without him, or even if he has a dream that I cheated on him. I’m not very good at expressing my emotions and will blow up at him, which perpetuates the issues. I don’t feel like we listen to each other. For example, I told him early on in our relationship that I didn’t want a big wedding, and instead I wanted a small intimate wedding with immediate family. After we got engaged, nobody listened to what I wanted, and even with COVID we had a 150 person wedding. (Even though he and his family were super, super diligent with their COVID precautions. To this day I don’t understand why they were willing to throw those precautions out the window for this wedding.) I can’t even look at our wedding photos, its just a reminder of how uncomfortable I was that day and how nobody listened to me or my concerns. I feel like we are not emotionally compatible, and I’m really tired of always having to tiptoe around him and his insecurities.

      • Monday

        Ok, this sounds like it’s not fixable. He’s showing some early signs of controlling/abusive behavior. I’m sorry you’re in this situation, but get out asap.

        • Anonymous

          +1
          I work with DV victims. This sounds like how they describe the beginning of their relationships. Save your ribs, get out now, not 10 years from now.

        • Cat

          Yeah, these are pretty fundamental issues. I would cut your losses now, embarrassing as it may be.

          • Anonymous

            Yup. As soon as he insisted on a 150-person wedding, that should have been it.

      • Anonymous

        Oh lord honey that sounds awful. So two big things stand out. The jealousy is a him issue, and very concerning. The second issue is it sounds like you are allowing yourself to be swallowed up by this marriage. You need to fix that no matter who you are married to or if you are single. I see you are in therapy which is a good start. Really focus on being able to stand up for yourself. As to your marriage, it does sound like you should be cutting your losses

      • Anon

        first of all, i am sorry that you are experiencing this. do you love him and want to try to make this work –> you guys need couples therapy stat. alternatively, if you feel like he will never trust you and doesn’t respect what you want, then you should get out now, but i still think you should seek therapy so you can become better at expressing your emotions, because that is important for all types of relationships

      • Anonymous

        End it. And I say that as someone whose marriage is finally in a good place after years of counselling. There are fixable issues and non- fixable ones. Trying to cut you off from friends/family is non-fixable.

        Our issues were cultural integration, family of origin issues etc. He never tried to limit me seeing my friends or family without him. That’s a huge red flag. Like reasonable if he doesn’t want you out with friends everyday but he should not insist on joining your girls brunch or lunch with your dad or whatever.

        • Anon

          I suspect this as well. Some people have a tendency to accuse others of the bad things they themselves are doing.

      • Anon

        So it sounds like he’s manipulative, jealous, and you’re easily coerced (the wedding didn’t happen TO you, you agreed to all the stuff you were uncomfortable with). This is a recipe for emotional abuse. I’d agree in this case this is not something you can work out in counseling, I would not disagree that you at the very least need to separate right now. Big if, if you can work through your confidence issues and standing up for yourself in individual counseling and he can work through his jealousy and controlling issues in individual counseling, there may be some hope…but I wouldn’t count on it.

      • MechanicalKeyboard

        Yikes. Honestly these are the kinds of issue that DO NOT get better with time. False accusations based on dreams, insecurity issues, boundary issues, and consistent gaslighting are NOT run of the mill newlywed blues. These are serious problems that only build the foundation for a toxic and loveless relationship. If there is some other trauma or issue that you all are working through it might be worth seeing a marriage counselor for a bit but I say get out as soon as you can.

      • Anon

        Yikes. Get out now. (FWIW many guys who are afraid of their partners cheating are in fact cheating themselves…)

      • Anon

        With this information, I’d say yes, leave now. Like others have said – these issues are not going to get better.

      • anon

        Yeah, this isn’t going to improve. I’d get out now. So sorry you’re dealing with this. Hugs from an internet stranger.

      • Nesprin

        Yup. If things stayed the same, how long would you stay? I’m guessing that you’d look at that question and grimace out a year or two, which is a pretty good sign that this marriage is doomed. If that’s how you feel, double down on birth control and plan your way out (fyi- sabotaging birth control is not out of the realm of possible for a controlling spouse trying to keep the other from leaving).

        FWIW- my wedding and 1st year were extremely stressful, but at no point there did I feel like I wasn’t seen or respected or important.

      • Senior Attorney

        Oh, no. Get out now. This was a mistake and the sooner you rectify it the better off you will be!

      • anon

        I’m so sorry to hear this OP. I agree with everyone else in the thread. Those are fundamental issues and I don’t think your relationship is likely to get better. It sounds like you’re with the wrong person. I would cut your losses now.

      • Anonymous

        Oh goodness, I am so sorry you are going through this. Aside from the wedding issues, I am in your situation 23 years and three kids later. Get out NOW while you can. So hard to navigate after so much time and with kids. Much easier to leave now, although it is never easy. Hugs to you!

      • Anon

        I’ve only read your second sentence but I say DTMFA. I have no time for men like that.

      • anon

        Leave now. Perhaps pursue an annulment? I’m not a lawyer but it might be easier…

      • Anon

        I’m so sorry all this has happened to you.
        It sounds to me like the marriage was a mistake, and it’s better to call it and get out now. Covid absolutely changed a lot of mindsets, created (sometimes false) senses of urgency, and put pressures on people that wouldn’t normally have existed, so to me, the mistake is understandable. All marriages take work and effort, but in this case, it sounds like there’s fundamental mismatch of personalities and priorities, and that is likely not fixable. Just for contrast, if you were 5 years into your marriage and saying “I feel like we used to communicate well but lately communication has deteriorated,” I think that’s a workable issue and would recommend couples counseling. Two months in, this is just incompatibility. I wish you the best of luck with your decision.

    • Anon

      1. WHY wss your engagement rocky and why is your marriage rocky?
      2. Do you have similar long term goals and values?
      3. Do you and your husband see a path forward?

      My marriage for off to a rocky start. There were a huge number of stresses on us, including my family verbally abusing me and using the resultant stress to say that I was mentally unstable. It was horrific. I think the only reason my marriage survived was my husband was incredibly supportive, and I got therapy and cut ties with my family.

      Point being, even when the stresses are external to the marriage, both parties have to work on fixing the situation.

    • Equestrian Attorney

      OP, as someone who cried on the night before the wedding and probably should have just cancelled but was embarrassed, then tried to make it work for two painful years before cutting my losses, my advice is: run now.

      • BeenThatGuy

        I’ve been the maid of honor for a bride in this situation. She sobbed in my arms the night before the wedding and I promised if she wanted to run, I would handle everything. But she went through with it. Had a baby immediately. Got divorced 2 years later and has been miserable co-parenting with her ex the last decade.

        OP, there’s no need to wait on getting divorced. You’re not happy and I promise you that won’t change.

    • Anonymous

      Honestly, get out now. Every single couple I know who said things like “the first year is the hardest” ended up divorced. The first year is not actually that hard if it’s the right relationship.

      • Anon

        I agree that OP should get divorced but I’m happily married 16 years and our first year had some big bumps. Things that bothered us dating and we had previously ignored suddenly became a big deal because neither of us wanted to deal with it the rest of our lives. Some of it is living together stuff like dishes and wet towels. Others were how to fight. It’s one thing to yell on the phone and hang up and call back and apologize. It is harder when you live together and have less space to figure things out alone.

      • Anon

        Depends on external factor though. I agree the relationship itself shouldn’t have lots of stress the first year but circumstances like a job loss or death of a parent or, ya know, a global pandemic, can make it a lot harder than it would otherwise be.

      • Anon

        I hope, for the sake of my marriage, that is not true. The first year of our marriage was brutal. The pressures from inside our marriage were hard enough; the pressures from outside of our marriage were rocket fuel on a stove fire.

      • Anon

        I really don’t understand the people who say this unless it’s people who haven’t lived with their partners before. I can’t imagine marrying somebody I hadn’t lived with.

    • Lori L

      I agree that it’s hard to give advice without knowing more details, that you may not be prepared to give. Is he verbally abusive, for example? But two things to keep in mind: 1. Many people underestimate the adjustment of being married. Several friends revealed to me years later that the first year of marriage was the worst for them. They were afraid to admit it because they thought they should be happy honeymooners. You can fall in love with someone who is not a good fit for your personality and daily habits. That can create a fiery but exciting courtship, but will require more effort in a marriage.
      2. Is it possible that the pandemic has exaggerated your issues because you have fewer opportunities to do fun things and to get away from each other?
      Only you can know whether things are bad enough to cut your losses now. Good luck!

    • Anon

      The first year of marriage is honestly one of the roughest getting used to your expectations as a spouse and from your spouse, navigating joint finances and joint life. If the issue is more like communication, frustration from changes, etc. I’d say stick it out the first year WITH marriage counseling.

      What are the issues you’re having?

      • Anon

        I know this has been a huge shift over time, but I just can’t imagine marrying somebody I hadn’t done all of those things with already.

      • NYCer

        As others have said, I really do not think its universally true that the first year of marriage is the toughest. Obviously we are just one data point, but our first year of marriage honestly was fantastic. We had already been living together, knew what our expectations were and how to navigate joint finances, etc. To me, that is stuff that is best worked out prior to marriage.

        • Anon

          Same here. That first year was like when we first got together as a couple all over again. We had worked out all the serious kinks of cohabiting when we were cohabiting before getting married (which did cause consternation on both sides of our family, back in 1998, but we didn’t GAF). Like someone else said, it’s hard for me to imagine what it’s like to marry someone you’ve never lived with.

    • Anon

      I also got married quickly, when I was 21 and right out of college. He was my college boyfriend and we got married instead of living together because of a family tragedy, and all around a terrible way to make decisions. It took us ten years to get divorced, with lots of heartbreak along the way. Cut your losses.

    • Anonymous

      It should not be that hard. Cut your losses now. It will not get easier with time.

  5. Calendar Coordination

    Can anyone recommend a way for an iphone user and an android user to coordinate calendars? My husband doesn’t find the physical calendar on the fridge effective and I am about to lose my mind.

      • Z

        This is the answer. Android should already have the google calendar app, you can get it from the app store for iphone. Make an account both of you have access to and log in on both phones.

        • Curious

          Or just create the events on your gCal and invite partner. Either works. And yes this is how we manage it even just across two Androids!

      • Shelle

        +1 My husband’s Android and my iPhone coordinate seamlessly through Google Calendar. Zero complaints.

        • Calendar Coordination

          Do you each maintain a separate google calendar and share or do you both put relevant appts on one calendar that you can both access?

          • Shelle

            I shared my personal calendar with him and vice versa. I’m the extrovert always making plans, so most events are on my calendar, and then I invite him to events we do together. He clicks yes so he can view it on his calendar. But I think your idea also works where you have a shared calendar and you’re both editors? Not 100% sure.

    • Cat

      this may not be a popular answer but we use each other’s work calendars for this – we mark everything private and use the “show as free” option liberally. (So if for example I have an event after work, I send husband a meeting invite that shows as ‘free’ on his calendar but then he knows what’s up.)

      • Anon

        I do that plus a google calendar – the settings don’t always hold so I put FYI to (H’s initial) in the subject line so he knows it’s not a mutual event and he can adjust on his end. Sending invites is what works for us, basically.

      • Anon

        I put all my husband’s work travel on my work calendar so I don’t book a work event the same evening I need to handle daycare pickup.

    • Cb

      We just invite each other to events, which helps for planning and management of kid stuff and commutes etc.

    • anonymous

      Gently, communicate with your spouse. Don’t corporate-tize your most intimate and important relationship in this world with a workplace calendar.

      • Cat

        what? I’m not sure how making each other’s lives easier by referencing *one* calendar rather than two is corporate-izing…

      • AFT

        Gonna second the “what?” I talk with my husband about things but also don’t expct to know my work schedule in and out so we share calendars so he knows if I’m going out of town, have after work meetings, have kid events, etc.

      • No Face

        My issue is remembering the dates, times, and locations of numerous events, not “corporate-tizing” my relationships. Weird way to view this.

        • anon

          I’d be divorced if we had to rely on me remembering these things without a calendar!

        • Anon

          So weird. Life got so much easier when we created a family Google calendar and loaded all the events into it. It saved me a ton of resentment for being the only person who knew when the dentist appointments were. Our teen son now uses the family Google calendar to keep us updated on when he has big tests or important sports practice dates coming up. I don’t think of it as “corporatized,” I think of it as being efficient.

  6. Anon

    I have to buy almost a whole new wardrobe after losing 60 pounds, so it’s a good time to redo my whole vibe.

    Where would you shop if you wanted really sleek, minimalist, sophisticated-but-badass clothes? Nothing puffy or frilly or patterned. I want to look like a French ninja.

    • Formerly Lilly

      Rag & Bone, Isabel Marant, Zadig & Voltaire, Agnes B. Not French Ninja, but for some well made basics, St James.

      • pugsnbourbon

        I thought All Saints, too – but there’s a surprising amount of ruffly stuff on the website! Apparently the prairie is inescapable this year.

    • AZCPA

      The Fold, SimpleModerne. I have a somewhat similar minimalist aesthetic, and end buy buying a lot of random single pieces at the typical haunts (Nordstorm has a surprising amount of black clothes).

      • PolyD

        That Simple Moderne site is fantastic! If I go back to the office on anything approaching a full time schedule, I am so going to cultivate the Casual Goth look.

    • Anonymous

      So this sounds exactly like my aesthetic. I don’t purchase anything new, instead I scower thrift stores, second hand shops, eBay, and online resale platforms. I look for high end stuff like max mara, akaris, but also a few mall brands like Eileen Fisher and Judith and Charles. But sometimes I get lucky with one offs from random brands too like vintage Ralph Lauren. I focus on garment construction and quality above all else. Only natural fibres and other hallmarks of quality like wide seams, French seams, silk lining etc.

      • Anon

        +1. My forever style inspiration is Calvin Klein’s Fall 2009 couture collection. All the clothes looked like things executives in a space exploration company would wear in the corporate offices onboard the mothership. You can look up the show on vogue dot com to see what I mean. (The Fall 2012 show had a similar vibe, not as interesting though). I cannot find any of those types of clothes in stores right now; I have to shop vintage. All the frilly prairiecore stuff out there right now is killing me. Bring back structure, please.

    • Anonymous Canadian

      Try Sophie Grace from Canada – all lovely stuff and ships to the US for sure.

    • Anonymous

      I strongly recommend a pair (or two) of coated jeans. They make everything look cooler. I have two pairs, brown from Paige and black from WHBM. French ninjas wear them during their off hours. Also, consider a faux leather moto jacket. You can get one for not too much $ and try it out. It’s a more badass version of a jean jacket.

  7. Anon

    Me: looking online to update my hair style

    Internet: the mullet is back!

    Me: lights laptop on fire, tosses it out a window

    • Anonymous

      The mullet only seems to be popular among people I hate so I think it’s hilarious

    • Anon

      It’s only popular amongst the Gen Z set that would have been a hipster had they been born a few years earlier.

    • anon

      Omg, ha! That’s how I felt when I went shopping recently. It’s been hot, so I decided to look for some new summer, work appropriate tops. I’m tall and thin. Everything (EVERYTHING!) I found was short or cropped and boxy. I went home with a new pair of workout leggings.

      • AnonATL

        I’m not tall and thin, but still the cropped boxy look is not for my hourglass figure. It makes my look like a dumpy blob. I have been so frustrated finding cute tops lately

    • Anon

      I have never hated a moment in fashion as much as I do right now. From hair to clothes…. thank u, next.

      • Anon

        +1. I hate the colors, the cut, the style of every piece of clothing. The hair is better but still, I’m not a fan. I can’t wait for us to get back to jewel tones and bright colors and fitted cuts. (If we’re going to have boot cut jeans, fine. But then give me a fitted t-shirt to wear on top, not a crop top or bandeau.)

      • Anon

        I’m having a frump crisis and am desperate to update my look, and I couldn’t have picked a worse time to try. You’re so right, everything trending is horrid.

      • Anon

        The best part is that the hair and clothes don’t even go together. Farm girl tiered ruffles and mullets… what are we supposed to do with this??

          • Anon

            The other day we went out to dinner as a family to one of our favorite nice restaurants. The young (very pretty) hostess had an elegant updo and was wearing a lovely flowered midi dress..with big chunky white Dr. Martens boots. I knew the look was very on-trend but it just looked off to me. My husband said, “is that some kind of fashion trend now, Doc boots with dresses” and I said, yep. Then I remembered there was a similar fashion moment back in the 90s, but as I recall, we wore our Doc boots with ankle dresses/skirts and it didn’t look quite so clumpfy.

    • Anonymous

      Pre-pandemic I had a platinum pixie cut. My hair hasn’t been cut or dyed since March of 2020. So I have a mullet with platinum ends to contrast my natural black hair. I look horrible but I’m glad to know I’m on trend.

      (Where I live the salons haven’t been open since the pandemic hit except for one very brief period. My salon was so booked up I only got in with a cancelation and four days before my appointment the salon was shut down due to a COVID-19 outbreak. I even bit the bullet and got on the list at another salon but then everything had to shut down again and they still haven’t opened. Sigh.)

      • Anonymous

        I’m right there with you — decided to go with a much shorter cut last summer for some odd reason. Not a great decision in retrospect. As it started to grow out, I had a friend cut an inch off the bottom to deal with the mullet style that was evolving. Hopefully our salons reopen in early July. It will be a full year since I was last year.
        On the bright side, I grew out my bangs, know the real colour of my hair and how much grey I have and will not cut it short again for at least a few years!

    • Anon

      I heard the current fashion is F the patriarchy. Clothes not intended to catch the male gaze.

  8. Anon

    We do this. I don’t have great work/life boundaries as it is, but I do everything on my work calendar. If it’s not on there, it ain’t happening. I mark things as free that I do not need to be physically present at (see: MIL’s flights for coming to visit us next week… in there as an FYI but marked as free). I have no time in my day to consult multiple calendars before scheduling things.

    • Curious

      Theme of the week: Burn capitalism to the ground.

      Gosh that sucks. Thanks for sharing.

    • Anon

      This actually makes me more likely to book an Airbnb via their platform. Call me cynical, but horrific things happen in hotels too and this just sounds like they’re more inclined to pay out decent compensation if something goes wrong.

      • Anon

        I dunno, I’d personally rather NOT be raped at knifepoint because the place where I’m staying gives out copies of the keys to anyone, rather than have $7 million.

        • anon

          Yeah this is one of the many many reasons I never understood the appeal of Airbnb and similar sites – the idea of tons of people having had access to a space (and who knows who copied keys) is terrifying to me.

        • Anon

          I’m not the Anon you’re responding to, and yes, of course I’d rather not be raped than have money. But, to me, the headline and the original post here present the issue as though these victims have no recourse because arbitration clauses and NDAs are being enforced — and that seems to very much not be the case.

          • Monday

            How not? Quoting:

            Anyone registering on the site is required to sign this agreement, which bars legal claims for injury or stress arising from a stay and requires confidential arbitration in the event of a dispute. Former safety agents estimate the company handles thousands of allegations of sexual assault every year, many involving rape. Yet only one case related to a sexual assault has been filed against Airbnb in U.S. courts, according to a review of electronically available state and federal lawsuits. Victims’ lawyers say the terms of service are an important reason.

          • Anon

            Monday: Because going to arbitration and/or settling for large sums of money *is* legal recourse. Just because it isn’t in a court doesn’t mean it isn’t recourse. You still get to file your claim – it’s just in a different forum. (Or, if settling before anyone files a claim, even better. Lots of litigation is handled this way where parties try to settle before anyone files suit.) And, honestly, the sums of money and types of payouts that were discussed in that article sound like way more than anyone would get in court (or at least courts in my area).

          • Monday

            Thanks for the answer, but I still don’t like it. Everyone navigating the situation is on her own with no knowledge of what has happened in other cases and apparently (often) prohibited from discussing the settlement. There’s also the cumulative legal effect of no lawsuits:

            The result of all these settlements, combined with the terms of service provisions that prevent lawsuits in the first place, is that the courts have never established the extent to which short-term rental operators might be liable, if at all, for crimes that take place in the properties they list. “The law around these platforms is unclear,” Li says. “Everything is getting sent to arbitration, so nobody really knows.”

          • Monday

            Oh and also–the last time we talked about ToS and waivers, many lawyers here said they just sign them because they know they’re never enforceable. So even if binding arbitration wasn’t favorable to the company (don’t know why they’d demand it otherwise?), my point was still that in the case of AirBnB, the terms apparently are enforced and signing them IS meaningful.

          • anonymous

            Juries in my state routinely award high 7 figure verdicts to victims of crimes against the owner of the property where the crime occurs. There was a verdict near $50 million within the last few years and the victim was engaging in an illegal transaction when he got shot by the other party to the transaction. (Side note: I don’t necessarily agree with these verdicts.)

            I think one thing that the poster(s) who don’t see an issue with this is overlooking as that while arbitration is legal recourse and can get a victim money, confidential arbitration doesn’t allow for public benefits that lawsuits do: namely, publicity and big verdicts that (for better and for worse) scare companies into improving safety measures, and the development of caselaw.

          • Anonymous

            Wow, lots of business owners here today. The reasons you all rely on arbitration clauses and NDAs are that you know arbitration tends to favor the business over the consumer, and NDAs mean that the company isn’t motivated by a fear of bad publicity.

          • Anon

            Just b/c you can get an award, you can’t always collect it, so suing AirBNB is all there is. If there are other incidents with a property / host, you can’t easily find that. That is why arbitration s*cks.

      • anon

        They’re protecting their reputation and business model, not paying compensation from the goodness of their hearts. They’re not going to pay “decent compensation” if they don’t have to. If they can use that arbitration clause–or anything else–to keep a victim out of court, they’ll do so. Arbitration clauses generally aren’t favorable to customers.

    • Anon

      If I’m raped at an AirBNB, you can bet my first call is to 911. The police report is public. Criminal proceedings are public. An anon friend calling someone who is the local newscaster re a public police report *should* happen re this stuff. It’s horrifying. At least at Marriott, Marriott is well-insured and not judgment proof and cares about headline risk. Plus, you can actually lock doors from inside so you can sleep safely without creepers creeping. I can maybe save a $ with AirBNB, but I’d never want to stay in one alone (my married friend stays in one with her husband, but I wouldn’t feel at ease).

      AirBNB owners are (IMO) largely judgment proof (they have a house, they need the AirBNB $ to pay the mortgage, you stand in line behind the mortgage company to collect . . . good luck with that) and under-insured (or in violation of their insurance).

      • Anon

        We really only stay in them in groups or with family. I agree I would never want to stay in one alone.

      • anon

        +1 million. I truly do not get the appeal of these rentals, I would not feel safe at all

        • Anon

          I’ve had so many bad experiences with hotels and creeps though.

          I guess it’s like taxis and Ubers… High risk of being sexually harassed or low risk of being murdered and never seen again. I usually take the Uber.

          • Anony

            I usually go with taxi since the drivers are hired by a company who screens them (depending what state – I *used* to travel to San Diego monthly and that’s where I took the majority of cab rides)… funny how we each make decisions RE Uber v. Taxi. I always felt safer alone in a taxi because at least the dispatcher was checking in / would know if driver went off the rails.

          • anon

            I’ve had experiences with creeps in hotels and hotel security was helpful. There is no security desk at a rental…

  10. Anon

    NYC hair stylist/colorist recommendations, please. I have to break up with my hair stylist of many, many years. Sigh. My (medium length, wavy, dark brown) hair grows fast and is pretty gray. Not ready to fully embrace the gray yet, so I am usually at the salon at least 1x/month for color (cut every third or fourth visit) and would like to find someone I don’t mind seeing so frequently! Ideal location would be UWS or midtown east. Thanks in advance!

    • Anonymous

      Nunzio Saviano salon! Felicia dosso in particular. Midtown east/UES border.

    • joan wilder

      I’ve recommended here before but George Rylander is wonderful with color and a wonderful person to chat with. He is now at The Parlor. (33rd near Madison and Fifth)

    • Anom

      Laura Braunstein on West 84th. Deanna is the best. The salon supposedly specializes in blonde coloring but my hair is dark brown and I’m happy with the coloring.

  11. Fashion Help

    Help me find a dress for my baby girl’s baptism? Size 12 hourglass, prefer sleeves. In the South so will be ~400 degrees out.

  12. Anon

    This looks like a mid 2000s shirt from a mid range mall store, definitely not a $100+ shirt.

  13. Outfit for Black Tie Wedding

    Anyone up for some vicarious shopping for a dress for an event? If you want to put my whole outfit together, EVEN BETTER!
    Event: Indoor, black tie July wedding at a temple in NY. Including the temple part because it means nothing too revealing (exposed shoulders are okay according to the couple).
    Me: Petite (5’0, 120 lbs.), size 4-6 depending on the brand, 34B. Pear-ish. Tends towards solid, streamlined, classic looks (so nothing ruffley, floral-y). Typically wear 3-4 in. heels for events. Love a drop earring.
    Budget: <$200 for the dress OR rent the runway. If you are similar in build to me and have a dress you've rented before, please share!!!
    Style notes: I've been seeing a tonnn of dresses with side or front slits, which I'm not sold on yet just because I'm not sure how it falls on a short person. Like am I going to be flashing people left and right? But open to it!

  14. Regular poster anon for this

    Random pride month related question.

    I’m an elder millennial who grew up in an extremely conservative family in a conservative part of the country, for context. I have always been attracted to and only dated men, and thought of myself as straight. I have also been attracted to women, but I assumed that all straight women were also attracted to women because women are wonderful and pretty. It has taken me until the last couple of years to determine that this assumption is not actually correct. I’ve been happily married to a man for 10+ years and don’t really feel the need to “come out” or anything like that. But I’m wondering if this is a common experience for people in our generation? I feel monumentally dumb.

    • Anonymous

      I think millenials in general are used to falling in line. I’m both autistic and bi, literally noone but DH knows this. Life is just simpler blending in.

    • Anon

      I’m with you. I don’t know if there is a term for what I feel. I am romantically and sexually attracted to men (and married to a man) but also sexually attracted to women. Meaning, I don’t want to date a woman but very much enjoy looking at them . . . and possibly more.

      I view sexuality as a spectrum and I think I’m not 100% straight. If 0 was straight and 100 was lesbian I’m maybe at 30?

      • Anon

        To your point though… I haven’t “come out” and said I’m not straight but I won’t deny when I find women attractive. I’ll discuss it openly (and like you said) something I thought was pretty normal.

      • anon

        Same here. I’m a straight woman and have always found women attractive. IMO there are far more attractive women than attractive men out there. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be garden with a woman, but it’s not something that I want to try in real life, although I will happily think about it. Fantasy is very different from reality, of course. I simply don’t feel the same intellectual/emotional desire to be with women (physically or in a relationship) that I do with respect to men. It’s hard to explain but it’s just not something that I feel “fits” with me, whereas I have always felt that male s*xuality does.

        • Anon

          I could have written this. I have been sexually attracted to women in the past, and actually dated a woman briefly in college (very little happened physically), but while I look at women in a sexual way, I don’t feel a strong desire to actually garden with a woman. I’m in a 20+ year marriage to a man and feel very happy and satisfied, and not like anything is “wrong” or missing in our relationship. If something happened to my husband and I ended up single, I don’t know if I would deliberately pursue a relationship with a woman; I would be more likely to date men. (But will admit, if a really amazing woman came along I would likely change my mind).

          I have a friend who has been married to a man for 20 years; prior to meeting him she was in some multi-month, committed relationships with women (three separate times). She does not identify as bisexual. My longtime best friend, like since middle school, recently told me she is bisexual, but as of yet has not actually gardened with or had a relationship with a woman (I guess she and her husband are negotiating ground rules about that as they do not want a “throuple” situation or for him to be involved in any way in her potential same-sex relationship). On the “1-100” scale mentioned above, I am probably a 25 or a 30 but would not identify myself as bisexual. I do think of it more as, there’s a spectrum and I’m comfortable where I am in the spectrum without applying a lot of labels to it.

      • anon

        It’s no secret that sexappeal in women gets emphasized disproportionately in pop culture. Seems reasonable to me that we (all genders) are much more versed discussing and critiquing the hotness of women.
        My private philosophy is that if you took away stereotypes (a woman behaves in this particular way, or a person of this sexual orientation behaves in that particular way), then you could just lose all categories of gender identity, sexual orientation, and people could just hook up or fall in love with other people. There wouldn’t have to be internal or societal struggles about identity. This will never happen, but within this framework, I have been content not having to label any affection or attraction that I or anyone else feels. This is with the caveat I have always passed as cisgender and heterosexual, so I have never gone ‘against the mainstream’ and never experienced the associated struggles.

        • Anon

          Oh thank you both for replying. After typing out my comment I thought wow, I sound like I just enjoy objectifying women (viewing them sexually but not romantically). The brain works how it works I guess.

    • Shelle

      It is very possible you are attracted to women, or to men and women, and it’s perfectly normal and not dumb at all to explore those thoughts no matter what point you’re at in life. I believe it’s incorrect to suggest that women are inherently physically attractive in a universal way. We are basically told all day long by a male dominated media that women are physically beautiful objects for all to admire, and men look weird and gross. This pervasive message might factor into what you’re feeling. Or it might not – you might genuinely be realizing you’ve always been attracted to women but just assumed that everyone felt that way. It sounds like you have a great opportunity here to do some introspection and learn more about yourself. Sexuality isn’t always clear cut, so don’t feel like you have to sort this into a yes/no determination. And remember it is a completely separate decision to make on if/how you act on what you discover.

    • AnonAlso

      I’m with you although am solid Gen X. I’m in a LTR with a man and completely satisfied in every way. But women are beautiful and I’m attracted to them. I’ve gardened with a woman once and it was great. I enjoyed it the same way I would with a man. I identify as straight but there’s also a spectrum I’d put myself on like the poster above mentions. With that said, I consider myself to be very normal.

    • Seventh Sister

      I’ve dated men and women, but it’s all kind of in the distant past in that I’ve been married for 15+ years to a guy. If we divorced or he passed away, I have no idea who (or if!) I’d want to date. I do wear pride-ish stuff from time to time, but don’t really identify as a member of the LBTQIA community. We go to a super gay-friendly Episcopal church, but I’m sure that the church friends who volunteered with me at the local pride event were like, “aw, look at the middle-aged mom volunteering with her kids,” not “hey, the bisexual is here!”

      Maybe this is an old GenXer thing, but I don’t feel like I owe anybody an explanation of my sexuality/preferences/dating chronology. People who have known me for a long time (except my parents) and/or are close to me know the whole story, but I don’t feel compelled to give people a huge explanation.

      • Anonymous Grouch

        This resonates. I prefer to consider people as individual people, vs. making sure to determine what little boxes they fit into and considering them from those perspectives. I feel like that’s what we old Gen Xers were taught to do as kids in an effort to treat everyone as equals. I don’t feel like it’s any of my business who a person is interested in sexually, or what culture they come from – they all should be treated with equal respect. Current identity politics just feel so strange to me.

      • Seventh Sister

        Honestly, I think the last time someone asked me my sexual orientation, I think I said “Tilda Swinton.” It’s not actually untrue, I think I’d make a wonderful Mrs. Swinton.

    • Anon

      I think this is a combination of zeitgeist and pandemic self-reflection; you are not alone. Also an Elder Millennial from a conservative background finally coming to terms with some facts about myself. Dated a girl in high school, parents found out and threatened to kick me out of the home. As an adult, I have never thought about myself as bisexual until now, some of which is a trauma response, some of which is femme invisibility, some of which is the fact that it’s rare I’m attracted to women (maybe 10% of the people I’m into are women, 90% men). Exclusively dated men as an adult. But I do think it’s not too late to revisit how you feel and get more comfortable in the truth of who you are! Link to follow w an article

    • Anon

      Bi lady here! Also married to a man, also invisible most of the time. It’s been rattling around and I’ve been slowly coming out – I put a bi flag in my front yard this June and some close friends and my mom know. I’m easing into accepting and fully embracing it one little step at a time. I support you, however you want to celebrate yourself.

    • anon

      I think it’s common to find women attractive, and I think it’s common for a lot of people to discover their bisexuality (i.e. more than just finding women pretty but actually wanting to date and sleep with them) later in life. But if you’re happily married, it should have no more of an impact than finding other men attractive. I’m sure you and your spouse see people every day that you are attracted to, but if you’re in a monogamous marriage, they’re just thoughts. I would come out to your spouse at least though – you should never feel like you have to hide anything from someone you’re married to.

  15. Abby

    Another shopping help post! I’m going to a golf tournament in July for work where we are hosting clients in a tent at one of the holes. I prefer skirts/dresses over pants, and I know I will be wearing white sneakers. Anyone want to shop for me? I’m late 20s, size 2-4, 5’7.
    I assume I should wear something to my knees (I hate midi length on me) and I’m torn if I need to have sleeves

  16. Anon

    For as long as I can remember I’ve had high maintenance feet. The cute, often cheap, shoes my friends wore would make me absolutely miserable. This has mostly been resolved by wearing higher quality, more supportive shoes; Birkenstock’s, Naot, Ecco, M. Gemi, etc. However, my feet are still often sore. Anyway, I just realized I seem to be developing tailor’s bunions on my pinky toes. I will see a doctor, but I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced this, and if you found anything that helps? TIA!

  17. Anonymous

    I feel uncomfortable asking this question in public, so thank you in advance internet strangers.

    For those of you who are white and who work for employers where you (now) have Juneteenth off, do you have any plans for Juneteenth that involve going to your local Juneteenth events? This will be the second year that my firm has made it a firm holiday/office closed. I’m also not busy with work at the moment, so it will be an actual day off for me. My state is back open and I’m fully vaccinated, so, unlike last year, there are various events and festivals right near where I live and no public health restrictions stopping me from going. However, as a white woman, I am unsure if it’s supportive to go to the events or if it’s not my place to be. Quite honestly, five years ago, I was only vaguely aware of the holiday, so I do feel uncomfortable with the idea of going to the events because it seems like virtue signaling.

    Since I have time off, I do plan to start reading Clint Smith’s book “How the Word is Passed”, but that is actually really only do with the fact that I know him from college and I haven’t had time to open the book yet, not because of it being Juneteenth.

    • Senior Attorney

      Ha! I am reading that book right now and read the Juneteenth chapter last night, in which one of the organizers of the Galveston Juneteenth celebration emphasized that it’s a celebration and educational event for everyone. (Also it’s an amazing book and I am loving it, even the parts that hurt.)

      • Senior Attorney

        And wait, what? You KNOW him?? Wow that’s so cool. Tell him your imaginary internet friend heard him on NPR and read his book and is a giant fangirl now.

    • Anonymous

      I’m just enjoying a day off. My community doesn’t have any large scale celebrations.

    • Anon

      Yeah, I’m not sure what to do. Treating it like any other holiday where we BBQ or go to the beach feels wrong. Treating it like Good Friday and a day of mourning feels wrong. It’s a day of celebration! So, probably lean more towards like it’s a regular holiday but making sure all the little ones understand why it is a holiday. I haven’t heard of any Juneteenth events near me but I would attend if they were having one.

      Also, I only learned what Juneteenth was a couple of years ago when it was on my calendar and I thought, what is that?? I thought (facepalm) it was a friend’s BBQ because they like to mesh months together for parties like Septober. I googled it and had a big OOOHHHHhhhhhhh moment.

    • Anonymous

      Go to the events but don’t post about it on social media. Go to be there, not so others know you’re properly celebrating the holiday or whatever.

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