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Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Ugh
My coworker has been clearing his throat nonstop for the past 25 minutes (not exaggerating) while eating a stinky microwaved breakfast sandwich. Lord beer me strength to make it through until Friday!
K
Lots of people in my office have some kind of cold and have been coughing and clearing throats all week. Praying I don’t get it. Good luck!
Anonymous
It’s also possible allergy related (post-nasal drip and all). In which case not contagious :)
Ellen
Yes, Frank is sick also, and he coughs up all sorts of stuff all day! FOOEY b/c his breathe is NEVER fresh anyway, but with all of that extra mucus, it is totaly DISGUSTING! TRIPEL FOOEY on that!
Cat
That is the best typo I’ve seen in quite some time ;)
Panda Bear
lol @ beer me. I sat next to a daily (minute-ly?) throat clearing co-worker for seven years. It was the least of my problems at that job, but was still. so. annoyinng.
January
Oh, I have one of those in my current job. Beer me strength indeed.
Fishie
The only thing the grosses me out more than throat clearing is loud chewing. I know it’s my problem and not the throat-clearer’s, but it makes me want to jump out of my skin. I assume I have an extreme case of misphonia.
Pompom
beer me too, lord!
I’d be more annoyed about the stinky sandwich, totally. The throat clearing may be an uncontrollable and innocuous result of something other than a contagious condition (tic, gerd/reflux, med side effect); doesn’t mean it’s not annoying to listen to, but.
Ugh
The stinky sandwich is a daily issue. The one time I politely asked if he would mind eating it in the kitchen instead of at his desk, he asked if the smell was bothering me because I was pregnant. I was not/am not pregnant but I was so taken aback by the question that I haven’t brought it up again. This morning the combination of the sandwich with the throat clearing just made the whole thing especially unbearable.
Pompom
Ugh, that is gross. I hate the smell of hot eggs and grease…blech. I’m very much a “don’t yuck someone’s yum” person, but dude, in the office…urghhh. I have a co-worker who heats up these hungry man quiche things in the morning and the smell just permeates the hallway. Solidarity (and lord beers).
lsw
My coworker heats up cabbage every day for lunch so I feel you. Lord, beer me.
Fishie
I feel like a lighthearted “Dude!” statement often can help in these situations. “Dude, that sandwich stinks! Is it liver and onions? Is it made of feet? Woof, you should eat that somewhere else.” Far less serious, and even if they laugh, maybe they will think twice about eating liver and onions at their desk next time. (I use “Dude” as a gender-neutral exclamation.)
And Peggy
I had a coworker who cleared her throat a lot at my old job, and it was really irritating. Doesn’t help that I’ve seen way too many people clear their throats intentionally to get someone’s attention, and/or signal disapproval of a behavior or outfit choice (similar to tsking), so for a while my instinct was to to immediately stop what I was doing, adjust my attire if needed, and sit/stand up straight when I heard someone clear their throat.
Grumpy
OG of the bootcut? I’m pretty sure sailors and/or cowboys were the origin of bootcut pants. And then there was wide-leg flare reboot of the 60s/70s. And THEN the 90s/2000s brought us the Express bootcuts.
OG? Puleez.
Anonymous
Don’t be grumpy.
housecounsel
The Editor pants were my wardrobe staple for my associate years in the early 2000s. I remember them so fondly.
anon
Same here. Unfortunately, after pregnancy, they don’t quite work for me anymore. I need the cut of the Editors, but the low-rise no longer works for me.
Grumpy
I don’t deny they are a wardrobe workhorse…I’m just side-eyeing the implication that they somehow invented the concept of bootcut.
OG Bootcut for women’s professional wear, maybe? But I like specificity in my caveats.
Leatty
I’m looking for suggestions on concealers to cover acne and dark spots. I’ve used clinique for a long time, but I’m just not thrilled with it. Any suggestions?
K
Laura Mercier Flawless Fusion Concealer is my current favorite. I’ve also used Tarte Shape Tape and found that it creased on me much sooner than expected. Laura Mercier lasts all day, no wear or creasing. I also use a primer underneath (Too Faced Hangover Rx) and top with the Laura Mercier Translucent Powder.
K
(Note: I exclusively use it for covering acne. Can’t be bothered to cover my dark circles. I’m sure it would work well for those too, though)
Calico
Thank you! I was just checking this out at Sephora yesterday. Now I’m sold.
Houda
In my experience, the highest coverage concealer in the industry is the Kevyn Aucoin sensual skin enhancer. You barely touch the thing and it covers perfectly. It’s an investment though but worth it, you can also thin it out with moisturizer and use as foundation.
Makeup forever also has a very high coverage concelaer.
If you have a very large area to cover, full coverage foundations can help e.g. Becca ultimate coverage complexion cream
IHHtown
+1 to Kevyn Aucoin. You can basically create a new face with an amount the size of a pin head – no exaggeration, one light touch will give you an entire face because it spreads so easily and widely – good too at $40 a pop. I’ve had mine for over a year and am barely 1/4 through. It goes on velvety smooth, not matte, not shiny, but rather like real skin.
BB
I like the Milk concealers, but one other thing you might look at is if you’re using the right shade of concealer. There was an article on Jezebel a while ago about concealers which was super helpful. I had no idea that to cover my dark spots, I actually want concealer that is DARKER than my normal skin tone, not lighter. It’s changed my concealer game!
lawsuited
A cream rather than a liquid concealer is going to give you the best coverage for spot-concealing acne and dark spots. I like Kevin Aucoin Skin Enhancer Concealer and Benefit Boi-ing Concealer.
+1 to Benefit Boi-Ing
I also LOVE LOVE LOVE the Benefit Boiing Concealer.
If you use it like I do – I’m really just trying to cover up a few crappy red spots on my face that never go away. I use the #3 medium concealer, I can throw it in any bag/purse/clutch for an event and it covers that crap up perfectly.
I”m not really into a whole face of foundation, tinted moisturizer, etc. so it works perfectly
Anonymous
NARS radiant creamy concealer. I have been a lifelong Clinique user, but recently switched to NARS and I’m never going back.
Anon
+1. This is what I use and love it!
Veronica Mars
I think the radiant is best for undereye circles. The new NARS Soft concealer is perfect for acne though! I got a sample and I’m in love.
Anon in NYC
I also love Nars, but the soft matte concealer. The coverage works better for me.
Love Nars
+1 Nars is my favorite. I don’t even bother with foundation anymore. A bit of Nars concealer + Laura Mercier setting powder, and I am on my way. FWIW, I have dark spots from acne and hyperpigmentation.
NY CPA
I like the Bobbi Brown retouching wand
Owl Lover
I love It Cosmetics bye bye under eye for my dark circles. However, I would not use it for Acme, its too heavy. Maybelline Instant Age Rewind is a cult favorite and if you can find the right shade I like Maybelline fit me concealer but alas, I am too pale.
Anonymous
I am very pale as well and have the same problem with many/most concealers being too dark :( But the It Cosmetics and Age Rewind work well and I also love the Bare Minerals foundation brushed on a spot with a small brush – it isn’t too dark, blends well and lasts forever.
Undereye circles are the bane of my existence. Alas, I think mine are more hollows (causing shadowing) from morning sickness weight loss with my youngest than true discoloration that I can cover up.
Anon
Covergirl invisible concealer is my favorite for good coverage and not making me break out further. The issue with some of the other super-duper stay ones is that they create more acne, which is not what I am going for.
I blend two colors bc I am bw Fair and Light. Works like a charm.
The Maybelline concealers used to be good but they changed the formulation and instant breakouts for me.
Anon
The Glossier concealer is excellent (and cost-effective).
Anonymous
You need Amazing Cosmetics Amazing Concealer. It’s the most opaque, concentrated concealer I have ever used. It dries kind of fast so you have to work small areas, but it sticks one it’s in place.
For breakouts, you may also want a color-correcting base to help cover the red!
Nars
Nars radiant creamy…I was also told to keep it on for a bit to let it “bake” before I blending it in. I usually apply a thicker layer with the sponge applicator it comes with, do the rest of my makeup and blend with my finger lightly (blotting not scrubbing) as the last step
Anonymous
I really like the Bare Minerals foundation powder. I use a small brush and paint it on the spot. It doesn’t cake or crack like some of the creams or liquids. I’ve tried the Clé de Peau for high end as well as several of the drugstore ones and this lasts forever and covers well.
Also I am really fair and it matches my skin tone well.
Carrots
DC friends, talk to me about your favorite walking commute shoes for winter (I know, I know, it’s August, but I want to make sure I budget for them and have them in hand before I actually NEED them). I moved in April and before that I had a driving commute, so the quality of my “snow” shoes wasn’t a huge concern. I’ve been thinking of Bean boots because I can get thicker socks to wear with them and my impression of winter weather here is more slush than actual snow drifts, but if there’s other recommendations, I’m down for it. My feet are on the wider side and I have a high inner arch (but I can always get an insole for that). I would say price range is somewhere in the $75-$150.
anon
I bought a pair of sorel boots 2 winters ago and haven’t yet needed to use them. They’re cute and comfortable. Just saying that there’s a decent chance you won’t have a use for them the way the weather has been the last couple of years.
BabyAssociate
Winter here is very, very mild (in my opinion, I guess it’s relative). The past two winters I don’t think we got any snow accumulation. I usually wear some sort of bootie, usually Kork Ease, or sneakers in the winter. Bean boots would be totally fine. You really will not need the thicker socks.
Anonymous
I have a walking commute in DC — sometimes I want the thicker socks! Maybe different if you have the shearling or Thinsulate ones. I wear tights a lot and find I need to put a pair of socks over them with my bean boots.
Anonymous
I’ve found that in DC I only need specific “winter” commuting shoes a few times a year, so I don’t invest in shoes just for that. I use my normal winter boots. I think Bean Boots sound like a good idea because you can wear them on the weekends too.
Anonymous
Normal boots for most days, snow boots for the rare snowy days.
Anonymous
Yup. My regular tall black leather boots can handle most of D.C. winters. I’ve found that I only needed winter boots a couple times (because, I mean, if it’s actually bad, no one’s going to work). My snow boots are these (in charcoal, really pretty): https://www.amazon.com/Kamik-Womens-Momentum-Snow-Black/dp/B00AZOC8D8 (Order up if you’re a half size)
Cat
FWIW, I find Bean/Sperry boots to be awful on slushy sidewalks. They’re trendy and get a lot of love, but I find that slush clings to all the little nooks and crannies, making them oddly slippery once you step on a smooth floor / metal grate / etc.
For mild but wet winter weather, I use my Hunters with the fleece liner socks; not the world’s warmest but ok for 10 minutes outside.
Anonymous
I live in that general area and would not recommend Bean Boots for a walking commute. The leather will tear up your ankles if you walk any distance in them. The tread is dangerously slippery on ice, which you will encounter regularly. The rubber also conducts the cold directly to your feet. I have Bean Boots but only wear them in the rain. Whenever temperatures approach freezing, I wear waterproof hiking boots instead.
Betty
+1 Bean Boots are amazing for wet conditions and mud (i.e. Late Winter/Spring/Early Summer in Maine) but are horrid with actual snow/slush/ice. The treads are not made to grip on ice/slush; instead, the slush gets stuck in the treads and you’re basically on ice skates. I use mine when I’m out working on our farm, but have actual winter boots for snow (and I’m in New England).
Kk
Bean Boots are made for stomping through the woods, not for sidewalks. As such, the rubber on the bottom will be worn down by the concrete and then it’ll be a perfectly slippery experience once you encounter slush and ice.
For something with a similar look to bean boots, you might like the Sorel Slimpack. For something sleeker- I have a pair of Sorels called the Emilie that are great on ice and snow, and look nice with jeans.
cbackson
Yeah, I prefer Bean boots for muddy parks in the fall, not for sidewalks and definitely not for snow/ice.
Anon
I have wide feet and a high arch, and love my Blondos. They’re waterproof with a rubber bottom. I’ve found them sufficiently warm for most days with a mid-weight smartwool sock.
lsw
Me too – this board changed my life by introducing me to Blondos. I wore mine almost every day for commuting last winter (and spring). I have a wide toebox and high arches, bought a half size up, put my inserts in, and these things are amazing.
MJ
Ugg Adirondack II low boots are the bomb-diggity. They’re like wearing warm sneakers–super-supportive, waterproof, warm, breathable. I just bought a second pair bc I live in boston and wear them constantly for commuting and dog-walking. They’re often on sale if you look at places like 6 p m etc. Cannot recommend highly enough. They are much more comfortable than Sorels. I also need arch support and Sorels were huge (width-wise on me) so my feel sloshed around. I also think they’re more forgiving than Bean Boots.
Tippins
I have and love these too!
Murz
I bought leather uggs last year and they are my favorite commuting/dog walking shoes. They have a thick rubber sole, much better than the normal uggs, and are waterproof. I no longer worry about puddles or slipping–I just stomp along with confidence. They replaced my bean boots and my normal uggs, and I honestly can’t praise them enough. So comfy and practical! I bought them online and they ended up being cheaper than traditional uggs. They also don’t look like uggs which is a win in my book.
Anonymous
link?
Murz
https://www.amazon.com/UGG-Australia-Womens-Brooks-Boots/dp/B0049WMD32
I got mine on Zappos though for 150, so look around!
Brunette Elle Woods
I bought a relatively cheap pair from target, maybe $50. They’re great! Now I need good rain boots since it has been non stop rain in NYC. Hunters?
Anonymous
I’m debating whether I need a career change. A little bit of background:
I practiced for several years at a regional firm. I had a very brief stint in compliance (less than one year, it wasn’t a good fit), and then I went in-house to what I thought was my dream job. I’ve been here a couple of years now and it’s not going well. My company is incredibly dysfunctional. We’ve been in a perpetual state of reorganization since the day I got here, and I am up to my eyeballs in politics. It often feels like my team is being actively undermined, sometimes by internal clients, sometimes by outside counsel, and sometimes by our own colleagues and leadership within the legal department. I’ve been trying to disengage, but I am exhausted and fed up. Something happened last week – I posted early last week after an employee completely misrepresented my advice and threw me under the bus to leadership. The update is, he’s totally getting away with it and I still look like an idiot after not being allowed to set the record straight and defend myself. It has been the perfect example of how bad things can go when you combine the dysfunction of the company generally with the bizarre leadership within the legal department. Did I already say I’m exhausted? Oh yea. I. Am. Exhausted.
I am starting to fantasize about leaving. I really don’t want to because I know the grass isn’t always greener and there will be quirks and issues no matter where I go. I also don’t want to look like a job hopper (which would basically be true at this point). If I had all the resilience in the world, I would just put in my time and stick it out. The pay is good. The hours are … okay. The location is nice. The subject area is interesting. But I’m just not sure how much more of this I’m capable of.
Before I accepted this job, I had an offer to join a small plaintiffs firm. The firm had 4 attorneys, 3 of whom started the firm together and are the named partners. I liked them when I interviewed, but that setup seems full of politics itself. I wouldn’t assume they still had a spot for me, but with my skills and experience (particularly including this in-house stint), there’s a decent chance they would still be interested.
Am I an idiot for considering this? I don’t know what to do.
Anonymous
Yes. That’s a terrible move for you. Stick it out and figure out how to make it work for now.
DCR
I don’t think leaving is a bad idea (that place sounds horrible, and makes my prior BigLaw firm look incredibly functional). But you ideally want to be leaving for something, not fleeing from something. It sounds like you like being in-house, and I don’t get the sense that you loved being at a firm. Why would you want to go back to a firm? Specifically, there was a reason you turned down that job. Why are you reconsidering? If it is just because you want an exit option, that would be a bad decision and likely lead to you wanting to jump again in a short time.
Have you considered looking for another in-house job in your practice area? Why not?
Anonymous
That sounds really rough, it’s understandable you are looking to leave. FWIW, if you’ve been there a few years, and also had a several years stint before the compliance-gig, it doesn’t make you look like a job hopper if you go where you can develop more.
Anonymous
+1
Anonymous
I don’t think it would be bad necessarily to explore other options, but the small firm option you mentioned sounds much worse than your current situation to me. Seems like it would be just as much politics, longer hours, and more stress.
Anon in NYC
Yes. I would try to move to another in-house position. The small plaintiffs firm sounds like it would be more of what you’re trying to get away from.
Anonymous
I’m in nearly the same position. On job 4 in 8.5 years of practice, and I thought this would be it and I’d stay for the rest of my career. The company is so blatantly discriminatory, sexist and dysfunctional, and the leadership is abusive. I don’t think I can stand it. I thought my last company was a mess, but this is at a whole other level. I think I may be stuck. How long does it take in a job as a lawyer before it stops looking like job hopping? As a millennial I keep hearing 2 years is normal, but I feel like in law that doesn’t hold true.
Anonymous
In law, I think a series of 2 year jobs starts to raise a concern. Probably, in part, because my experience is that it takes 2 years for a BigLaw firm to push someone out, so it just looks like a person who was encouraged to leave a lot of jobs or just isn’t happy anywhere. I ideally like to see at least one 4-5 year job, and then a few in the 2-3 year range isn’t is concerning then.
Anonymous
Yeah, first big law job was 3 years, then lateraled to a different, less niche area within corporate to another big law firm, then got worked to death and went in house after a year. First in house job my boss swore at me and dumped all her work on me, then headquarters started gutting the work we did so we just became non-strategic paper pushers. Now in headquarters at another place, but despite all efforts at due diligence, I find it very hard to truly find out about a place’s culture and a boss’s work style. What have others done to vet this? It usually takes a few months past the honeymoon phase where everyone is on best behavior for things to start to show in my experience.
Millennial
As a millennial, I know that the only way to succeed and grow as a person is by continually challenging yourself to embark on new and better journeys. Therefore, when you get stuck in a spot that is abusive, discriminatory, or outright dysfunctional, you have to know that you need to move on. However, you have to move to something better, use your network from law school, research some other practice areas or technology and other jobs that are out there in order to find an area that you can sell yourself in. It does sound like some of your problems are because you are working in-house, but good well run companies do not always have these problems. Do your research and it will be worth the move. Its not worth it for your mental health to stay.
Anonymous
Don’t join a small plaintiffs firm! I hope I don’t offend any plaintiffs attorneys, but I have worked at 2 plaintiffs firm and have quite a few colleagues who are “plaintiffs firms refugees”, they are rife with dysfunction. Consider looking for another in house job. Sorry you’re going through this, I totally understand that even though it’s objectively good job the dysfunction and undermining are grating and can make you question your self worth (especially if you’re like me and define yourself by your career in a very unhealthy way!). What you’re feeling is completely valid.
Scarlett
I’ll disagree and say hat if you have a passion for the plaintiffs work, and it’s people you like, that might be a great move, but I don’t have enough info from your post. I wouldn’t rule it out. I also agree don’t run away but run to. And absolutely start looking. Yes, job hopping is something to think about but not at the expense of your life and career satisfaction. A lot of jobs aren’t great, and sometimes you’ve gotta leave. If some cranky person you’re interviewing with doesn’t understand that, perhaps it’s not a place you want to be. Especially since you don’t seem that hoppy to me – a law firm is normal,even in a “short” stint, and so is a short in-house gig as those vary wildly (companies buy/sell/reorg, etc.). Finally though, I think you need to accept and realize there are going to be politics everywhere and how to play that game – sounds like they’re getting the best of you here, but in your next move try to figure them out and build some capital yourself as it will make things easier. More networking and understanding the business/issues, less heads down.
Belle Boyd
First, take a deep breath.
I remember your post from last week. You got shafted. I don’t blame you one bit for feeling like you want to/should leave. But are you truly feeling that leaving is the best thing do to right now or are it that a reactionary response to what happened? Give yourself a little bit of time to let the dust settle and to settle your own feelings about what happened before making any big decisions. If you still feel that leaving is the best option, then okay. But right now, I’m thinking that maybe you’re feeling the need to escape, and leaving under those kind of circumstances isn’t always good — you aren’t thinking clearly, you feel like you have to get out, you end up taking the first job that comes along that sounds great but really isn’t and you’re back at square one.
Yeah, I know. I’ve been there, done that.
As for the plaintiffs firm, no. There was a reason you didn’t take that job, and I have a feeling you’re looking back on it with a feeling of “well, maybe it wasn’t so bad, maybe I mis-read…” because you are feeling the need to escape where you are now. Whatever underlying reason — whatever gave you the gut feeling to say no – and kept you from taking that job is still there.
Just hang in for a bit. I’ve been in your shoes. I know it’s tough, but you can be tougher. Let this blow over. If it doesn’t, or if in a little bit of time you are still feeling this way, THEN start looking. It’s easy to run when you get kicked. I know the feeling, and I am absolutely not trying to discount what you’ve been through. But don’t let this experience eat at you. Be known as the one that comes back harder after that kicking.
peach
Before you give up on this place, maybe you should try to find new ways of handling the internal politics. Maybe you need to build your soft skill set. The HBR blog has lots of helpful articles about these kinds of issues.
Here are some ideas that might help:
Consider having pre-alignment meeting with internal clients regarding issues where you let them air their concerns and you function in more of a listening mode. Then, specifically align with your management before having an official meeting with your internal client to make a recommendation or issuing official advice. (You might already be doing this…)
Maybe you need to step up how you are managing expectations.
You could start playing the CYA game, too. Document, document, document. If you have a call giving advice, follow up with an email that says, as we discussed in our call… blah, blah. You could even pre-write that email so that you can send it out immediately afterward… before the listener can shoot off an email to someone else recharacterizing what you said. It may be that the person just didn’t understand what you told them, too. Remember, for inhouse clients – KISS method is best.
Be mindful of helping others save face.
If outside counsel is undermining in-house counsel, you need to shut those folks down.
Hallsbrook?
Has anyone shopped here?
I think it’s just a website and not a store (maybe in NYC?). But it seems to have a lot more nice grown-up brands / items.
I’m in a BigLaw branch office and even though I’ve been out of school for a while, I haven’t found anything in my city except the same mall stores our summers shop at. [There may be better pickings locally, but b/c work and having small kids, I barely have enough time to internet shop, much less try to find cool work clothes in a city where it seems rare for women with kids to have real career jobs once they have kids.]
yes
I have purchased a few things from Halsbrook over the past year and have been pleased. My reasons are similar to yours. I was working full time and in school part time (with a husband and child in the mix) yet need to dress very professionally. Everything I’ve bought so far – a navy blazer, a belt and a tshirt – were basics on sale but I am considering having them send whole outfits on approval now that I finished school and have a bit more time. I really think a few key outfits from there could go a long way! Looking at their site also makes me want to invest in a pair of Ferragamo block heels and wear them alot. :)
Anonymous
Love Halsbrook and wish I could afford more from there. They seem to do a great job of curating clothes and accessories for women who need to dress conservatively (and expensively)
LK
I need a comfortable, business-casual, budget-friendly shoe! I’m starting a new job where I’m going to be on my feet all day but I also want to look nice. I have to wear a uniform (navy polo with khaki color pants; I’m going with the Old Navy Pixie). I usually wear ballet flat style shoes but I know they usually aren’t the most supportive. Budget is under $100.
Anonymous
The croc flats in a black colour. So comfy and inexpensive
pugsnbourbon
I’ve found very comfy shoes from SoftWalk, Hush Puppies and Dr. Scholls on Am@zon, all for well under $100.
When I wore a polo+khaki uniform, I wore comfortable, simple sneakers. Prioritize comfort if you’re on your feet all day.
Leatty
Sam Edelman felicia flats. They are so comfortable that I feel like I am wearing slippers.
L
Lucky brand shoes are very comfortable and in your budget!
Anonymous
I’m on my feet all day, and in warmer weather I usually wear Superga sneakers or the Puma Vega ballet flats (per recommendation from this community). For colder weather I have a couple of pairs of boots/booties from the Aerosoles outlet. As previously recommended, Dr. Scholl’s brand shoes also work really well.
Laura
check out some of the clark’s cloudstepper series–so comfortable!
BeenThatGuy
Try Vionic
https://www.dsw.com/en/us/product/vionic-posey-flat/441177?cm_mmc=CSE-_-GPS-_-G_Shopping_Flats-_-New_Flats&cadevice=c&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI3v6WneTx3AIVmYrICh3eAgIYEAQYAiABEgI5E_D_BwE
LK
These are all great! Thanks so much everyone!
AnonTechie
Aerosoles have a ticker flat – like shoe that works well for my 10000 + steps on cobbled streets life :)
Lobbyist
Anne Klein Sport flats. They sell them on amazon.
Anonymous
I spent way too long online yesterday trying to figure out if my McCann’s Irish Oats are contaminated per that environmental study that came out. Does anyone know? I know it’s TBD if the rates cited are really dangerous for adults but my toddler and baby also consume this pretty regularly so I’d like to figure this out. Anyone have any insight?
Anonymous
I am just going to switch to organic oats. Even though some of the organic samples tested did contain RoundUp, the concentrations in the organic samples were much lower.
Anonymous
Same.
Anon
For anything I eat daily, I eat organic. That includes coffee. Maybe that could be your new rule of thumb too?
Anonymous
I personally think that’s not the right approach. You might get more pesticides eating a high-pesticide non-organic food once a week versus a low-pesticide non-organic food every day. There’s good scientific evidence about what foods are worth purchasing organic. For things like a banana, where you don’t eat the exterior, it really doesn’t matter. But there’s a lot of evidence that milk is worth purchasing organic and now I would add cereal to that list too, even if it’s not something you eat daily.
Blueberries
I think it’s also worth considering what the pesticides do the workers and those who leave near the farms, not just one’s own exposure. For pesticides used on bananas at least, I’m aware of some research indicating that the pesticides are harmful to pregnant women and to babies and children who live nearby.
Prop65- CA Law
In California this is a law banning a large quantity of harmful chemicals to be present in products. These are common in soft-plastics, and various food items. Adding link below (if it ever gets through mod) which makes it easy to search based on the company.
A notice is not a guarantee something was found but it has to be backed up by results so it is very likely a noticed product had high levels of a harmful chemical. If you’re slightly tech-savvy you can look up the complaint/settlement etc for the products.
I searched for McCann’s and found nothing but this is just a CA website
Prop 65- CA Law
https://oag.ca.gov/prop65/60-day-notice-search
(post explaining this link is stuck in mod)
Anonymous
https://plantoutofplace.com/2018/08/glyphosate-and-cancer-revisited/
Anonymous
Love this color. And I am not a Pink person.
Anon for This
Following up on everyone’s helpful advice on the job posting that my colleague circulated. Several people suggested that I get my partner’s support to go over to that client. That’s not going to happen because my going over there will leave said partner with a big gap since I am the main attorney working on the partners matters for this and every other client. The partner will be upset if I leave. But I’m also a partner (a service partner with few clients), so it’s not like I am one of the many associates in the group. I also think if people knew I was looking to leave, and I did not get the job, it would affect my future a lot at the firm since people value loyalty and everyone drinks the koolaid and is brainwashed into thinking that being at a firm means you should be on call all the time and we pride ourselves on being “responsive” aka having no life. The inhouse job cannot be this bad.
Scarlett
Oh, I’d still approach the client and ask them to keep it confidential. Be warned though, unless you made partner after only a few years in (like 8-10), you might have a harder time going in-house so definitely keep confidential.
Anon in NYC
In that case, I agree with Scarlett that you should still reach out but ask the client to keep it confidential. You can tell them that you were not looking to leave your firm, but this opportunity sounded really interesting to you and that you are already familiar with the company since you’ve done work for them in the past.
And, if word ever got back to your firm, I think you say basically the same thing, you’re not looking to leave, but this sounded really interesting to you, with the addendum that you going in house at this particular client would only strengthen the relationship between the client and the firm.
At the end of the day, applying might have consequences, but it sounds like you would be happier, so why not acknowledge the consequences and still apply?
Trunk Club?
Anyone done Trunk Club lately that can comment on the experience? I’ve done it in the past and my last trunk (about a year ago) was a total miss but wondering if I should give them another chance. We have a European vacation coming up and between work and the kids I have no time to shop but would like a few new pieces. It’s still so hot here that I’m having a hard time getting inspired by fall clothes online but expect it to be in the 50-60s for our trip.
cbackson
I think there was a thread last week and basically no one who’d tried it recently was happy.
Anonymous
I have no idea how common this is but I have a friend/acquaintance who does personal styling including just online – maybe somebody like that would be more helpful than Trunk Club?
Anon
I loved my trunk club experiences. I asked the stylist to help me be more stylish on the weekends and the items she chose for me are basically what i wear every weekend now. Then i asked her to pick some soft work jackets and she hit that one out of the park. I was very pleased overall. She was also extremely low pressure.
The frenchie is my favorite kid
My Trunk Club was a flop.
I spent a lot of time describing my body shape and measurements (curvy, very curvy) and what works for me and what doesn’t and asked for pieces for casual wear updates that are flattering takes for my body type. I rejected – with lengthy explanations – a number of items from the first box that was prepared before it shipped. When my box arrived it was basically repeats of items I had rejected and NOTHING worked on me. Everything was that adorable flowy bohemian stuff that makes me look like a giant box because it hangs off my large chest in front and large b!tt in back.
I kept one pair of jeans that I would not have otherwise considered but overall I was very disappointed.
Stitch Fix wasn’t great for me either – everything was a bit twee and I looked too much like a kindergarten teacher – which is adorable for young fashion bloggers and kindergarten teachers but not 40-somethings heading into the mutton zone.
Anonymous
It was a flop for me too. After a very detailed explanation of what I wanted and my body type I got exactly the opposite. If they tried they could not have been more opposite. It was not even an outfit. Just random stuff. I cancelled.
Liz
I use it regularly and love it. Basically everything I wear is from there or MMLF. I did have to go into the store the first couple times for my stylist to get the feel for what I liked as far as workwear, but she was awesome at picking out casual clothes like you’re describing. YMMV relative to other people’s experiences, I guess?
Sweater Help!
Trying to find fall and winter sweaters that aren’t boxy. I’m 5’3, 36C but super hourglass. This has meant that every sweater I’ve tried on has been way too wide at the sides as it fits my bust and hits my hips, with tons of extra fabric in between. What’s the trick to this? I don’t want to wear belts in weird spots to make it closer to fitting me and a tailor said that it’d cost a fortune to try to take in the sides of sweaters.
Help, Hive, Help!
Anon
I’m an hourglass, but tall so I don’t know if it would work for you, but I LOVE my LL Bean Signature Cotton Fisherman Tunic sweater. It’s cut long and lean. I’m asking for two more for Christmas because I adore it so much.
Anonymous
You might need to try a more tarty-type store (like bebe or VS or a nicer version with similar cuts). Otherwise, sweaters are just going to be really boxy and not sweater-girl-type sweaters.
I’m short, but it seems that sweaters aren’t every scaled to a person who is petite (cropped doesn’t count) and I drown in them. I’ve just accepted that sweater coats and dusters work better than regular sweaters (but I am eyeing cuyana — not sure if they will work on my shape though).
lawsuited
My tailor takes in the sides of my sweaters and it doesn’t cost more than taking in the sides of a blouse. The sweaters I’m having taken in are from Gap and BR and already have sewn side seams so it’s not like I’m asking to reknit a tube sweater or something. Maybe get a second opinion from another tailor?
Anon
What about cropped styles. Both j crew and loft have some cute cropped cardigans right now.
Other than that, maybe you could take up knitting!
Monday
Wrap sweaters? Long cardigans sized down?
Anonymous
I don’t understand why the tailor said that unless it was a really heavy/thick sweater. Most sweaters sold commercially, particularly thinner sweaters, are cut and sewn from large panels of knit cloth rather than knit in shaped pieces and sewn together. (“Fully fashioned” sweaters are more expensive). You just need to sew a slightly elastic seam, which can be done easily enough with a regular machine (zig zag stitch) or a serger. So I would consider a second opinion if you want to go the tailoring route. Otherwise, look for thinner sweaters that are ribbed–ribbing adds more stretch–and meant to be fitted. Wool is also generally more elastic than cotton.
Bravissimo!
Bravissimo! UK brand that specializes in D+ fashion. (If you’re having that much of a ratio disparity between bu$t and waist, you may want to get remeasured.) It’s been almost life changing to have access to clothes that don’t smoosh me or billow off my waist!
Aquae Sulis
+1 I’ve got quite a few Bravissimo dresses and tops now.
My only complaint is that they need to expand their colour palette!
Anon
I’m going to share my secret weapon with you. Liz Claiborne at JCPenney in petites. It’s seasonal and you’ll end up returning many, but this is the only combo that works for me at all.
https://www.jcpenney.com/p/liz-claiborne-long-sleeve-v-neck-pullover-sweater/ppr5007383431?pTmplType=regular&catId=SearchResults&searchTerm=sweater+liz+claiborbne&productGridView=medium&badge=fewleft
KateMiddletown
Lightweight is your friend here – J Crew Tippi is awesome.
anon
So my body type is a little different, but I think I have a similar issue and here’s what works for me.
I’m 5’9, 36DD, broad shoulders, and significantly hourglass. Being taller, sometimes I embrace the boxy look (with slimmer pants or skirt on the bottom), but it may not work for you. (I hesitated to for years because of the hourglass thing, but I’ve found a lot of things that actually do work. YMMV) But when I want a more fitted look I rely on Everlane’s $100 cashmere sweaters and J.Crew/Banana/etc. thinner merino items. Cosign on the recommendation to wear a thin cardigan with a blouse underneath as well. MMLF had some nice thinner sweaters last season too, on the spendier side. And their Morandi sweater I think is really flattering on an hourglass.
super anon
I can only ask this anonymously so here goes: what do you ladies do for workwear during your period? I normally wear vanishing edge panties under my work slacks. However, I’ve been finding that those panties are not the best for when I need to stick a maxi pad in them… so I revert back to cotton briefs because the material is not as slippery and then have visible lines.
Has anyone else dealt with this? Tampons are unfortunately not an options for me. I’ve been reverting to longer blazers/cardigans for period days, but I feel frumpy and just want to be able to wear what I normally wear without worrying about VPL!
Anonymous
I wear normal cotton underwear and I don’t care if someone can tell I’m wearing underwear. People wear underwear.
Anonymous
Yeah I just dngaf generally. If your pants are big enough and people can still vaguely see a line whatevs
anon
I know you say that tampons don’t work but have you tried the DivaCup? Life changer.
bellatrix
Seconding the mention of a cup. I haven’t been able to wear tampons comfortably since my son was born. Last month I had to take said son swimming while on my period, so I had to use my cup, which I tried several years ago and hadn’t really given a fair shot to. Once I got it inserted correctly it was surprisingly wearable. I could tell it was there, but I suspect it was like the first time I wore a tampon in my teens — you’re aware of it until you get used to it. I think I’ll stick with pads for the most part, but the cup is worth a try if pads cramp (haha) your style.
...
What about pants or skirts/dresses with patterns or styles that distract (so no one would notice VPL) or that lay away from your body… like fuller skirts?
Also, not sure why tampons don’t work for you but if there’s pain or super heavy situations going on, please talk with your gyno, this can be a sign of endometriosis, PCOS, or other medical issues! <3
And Peggy
Yes, I’d probably opt for A-lines skirts, or any dress or skirt that’s lined, because that extra layer will help smooth things out.
Cat
I wear a-line skirts…
Anonymous
If you have VPL constantly with regular undies then your pants/skirts may be too tight.
I just wear regular undies and accept that occassionally there may be some minor VPL depending on exact undies and pant/skirt combo. Some undies just work better with certain skirts/pants than others.
Anonymous
I have lots of junk in my trunk and have unsightly VPL due to said junk. Vanishing edge undies are a miracle product for me.
Anonymous
You could wear your regular underwear and then throw a light pair of shapewear over them to smooth out the VPL if it really bothers you.
Anonymous
I’m like you in the no tampons dept (there are dozens of us!). I generally wear cotton undies with thicker pants and probably have some VPL, but I can live with that. I also wear dresses with Spanx over the cotton undies, that smooths out the VPL so its no longer visible (or super visible).
Long Tops
I have some longer blouses (front is shorter/back is longer) from Ann Taylor that I love to wear during these days. They cover my butt, but still long young and professional. I make sure my pants are fitted in the legs during these days to not feel frumpy and to make the outfit look extra nice. :)
Definitely not frumpy, but very comfortable. And if tampons didn’t work for you, a DivaCup may not either, even if everyone sings its praises. A midwife at my OB’s practice said that I have the “cutest and tiniest cervix” she has seen and have a small anatomy generally, particularly as I have never had kids. She said that this is why it’s incredibly uncomfortable for me to use these products and that some women are just like that. I add this TMI bit because I felt weird and guilty for a long time for not being able to just use things everyone else did.
Mineallmine
+1 for the anatomy lesson. I’m glad tampons and moon cups work for others, but I’m not weird, nor am I doing it wrong because they are both very painful for me. It’s just my anatomy – nothing wrong me, I’m just a different type, so please don’t shame me for using pads. It’s why we have options thankfully!
Anonymous
Have you tried the period underwear? I have not tried it because I don’t get period with my mirena but I’m intrigued by the concept and have heard that people seem to like them.
Jeffiner
I have Thinx, and I love them, but they are a lot thicker than even cotton underwear. I typically wear skirts or thicker pants, and just ignore whatever VPL I have.
Anonymous
I have them, but I would not recommend them as your sole protection. Especially if you have a medium to heavy flow. You’d have to change out pairs every time you would change out your pad. I love them for light days at the beginning / end and for IUD spotting. The heavier flow pairs are still going to give you VPL if regular briefs do.
Anon
I wear them for sleeping exclusively. No having to get up and change and no worry about TSS!
DLC
I’ll wear skirts or a dress with bike shorts or leggings underneath. Or jeans and yoga pants. But I work in a super casual/ artsy environment where I can get away with that. Basically, though, I’ve found that I need to wear snug bottoms to be comfortable with a pad on, or else I have this fear of leaking or shifting. When I was a teenager and first getting my period, my mom gave me this pair of super snug underwear to wear during my period. They were the best, but they were from Taiwan, and I haven’t been able to find them since. So now I hair wear my regular underwear.
Anonymous
I just wouldnt GAF about the VPL. Most noticeable to you, and even if I notice it on someone I dont give it a half a thought and I think most (all normal) people are the same way.
Horse Crazy
I just wear cotton underwear also. If someone is staring at my butt long enough to notice the lines, we have a different problem.
Anonymous
OP here – thanks all for the suggestions. I’ve tried Thinx and agree that my flow is too much for those and that they actually give worse VPL.
I think I may just need do a combination of chilling out and consider pants that are looser or made from thicker material for those days. Glad to know I’m not alone in having this issue!
Dealtwiththis
I revert to normal cotton underwear and then wear spanx to cover the lines. Sometimes not fun to have it pressing on the tummy but it’s what I do.
anon
I also favor skirts and dresses more at that time of the month. I just find it easier to navigate underwear/pads/etc. that way, especially in winter when tights provide a little extra help in smoothing everything out.
NOLA dinner
If you could only eat one dinner in New Orleans where would you eat?
Anonymous
Restaurant August has amazing food but Commander’s Palace is the best of the classic places if you’ve never been before. So it depends on what you’re going for.
Anon
Oh yes! August is amazing!
Also, if you’re going this month, check out Coolinary – they have special menus at a lot of places.
anon
Cochon
NOLA Anon
Right now my favorite restaurant in NOLA is Mais Arepas – but that’s Colombian food. Presumably you want New Orleans-style food. In that case, I would probably say Ralph’s on the Park or Commander’s Palace. But there are so many places, you really can’t go wrong! Enjoy and let us know what you end up choosing!
SC
I love Mais Arepas. My husband used to work near there, and I would pick up an order and meet him for lunch at his work on Saturdays. It’s been a long time since I’ve been, so we’re due for another visit!
Also, I tried Tito’s Ceviche and Pisco (Peruvian) a couple of weeks ago, and it was stellar! The grilled octopus is the best I’ve had in Nola, and everything we had was delicious.
Beans
Restaurant August for really nice dinner, Cochon more casual. I also like Herbsaint and La Petite Grocery.
Anonymous
Atchafalaya. Get the crab ravioli!
NOLA Anon
Atchafalaya! So good. Y’all are making me want to go eat right now with all these posts. Early lunch? :)
Anonymous
I’m probably pronouncing this wrong in my head, but that sounds pretty much like the way I would spell out a sneeze :)
SC
You probably are pronouncing it wrong–as a non-native, I was corrected at work the other day–but no matter how you pronounce it, it sounds like a sneeze :)
SC
Bayona–the food, service, and atmosphere are all amazing, and it’s authentic without being old-fashioned. The chef is also a bad-*ss, pioneering woman.
Anonymous
Cosign Bayona! Their patio in particular is lovely, if the weather’s good when you’re there.
And supporting a woman chef is a great f-you alternative to John Besh, whose restaurants I would have previously recommended.
Scarlett
+1
Anonymous
+1
Anonymous
Just an FYI that August is a restaurant run by John Besh, who is a really terrible person (https://www.nola.com/business/index.ssf/2017/10/john_besh_restaurants_fostered.html). The food is excellent, but I try not to support people who are known sexual harassers.
anon
I thought he stepped down?
SC
He stepped down from his position of executive chef of BRG Hospitality, and he’s not currently involved in operations, but he’s a co-owner, so he still gets to take home his share of the profits.
Lilly
Commanders Palace, August, or Galatoires. Galatoires for lunch and not in the part that takes reservations. My vote for most awesome food and service and overall experience in NOLA is the Saturday and Sunday Jazz Brunch at Commanders.
NOLA (the OG)
Coquette or La Petite Grocery.
anon.
If you’re still there – I’m in NOLA and the places I’d recommend for a NOLA experience right now are –
High end – Commander’s, Brigstens, Galatoire’s, Herbsaint, Delmonico
For more midrange, Meril, Maypop, Saba
New to NoVA
Had one of the best meals of my life at Cochon, but agreed it’s casual.
Anonymous
Any advice on how to or whether to raise issues I’m having with an assistant to the higher ups? I’m relatively low on the food chain at my law firm. At my firm we don’t have assigned assistants, but rather the cases have assigned assistants and so I have to the assigned assistant for each case- its a horrible system. One assistant is really, really bad. She will receive documents on a case and not forward them to me, nor file them where I can access them. So I won’t know they exist until weeks later. She will not follow up on anything, even if I directly tell her to. She sends correspondence out with major typos, in docx form, despite me repeatedly requesting she convert to pdf before sending anything. She balks and seems to take personal offense whenever I ask her to do basic secretarial tasks, like scanning/copying, etc. She often leaves early without telling anyone, so when I’ve asked her to file something “ASAP” I don’t realize that shes not at her desk (she has access to email on her phone but doesn’t bother responding that she is gone for the day). The list goes on!! I feel like I spend a huge amount of my time doing her job AND mine, and I have a billing requirement of over 2,200 hours per year. My impression is she only treats the young associates like me this way, but is able to keep her actual boss, the managing partner, happy. Help?!
Anon
Unacceptable. Follow-up regularly and document document document – including when you ask for something at a reasonable time, like 3, and she is already gone for the day. When it causes the next big issue, say something to the partner in charge of the case, ask for it to be moved to another assistant.
Anonymous
You need to say something as this will reflect on you if you don’t.
Anon
Next time something happens (which sounds like it will be today), go talk to someone more senior about it ASAP. You are responsible for anything your assistant screws up, no matter how unfair that may be. My assistant, who is generally stellar, has screwed up two things for me (hugely) in the past 6 months. At one point, she filed two copies of a Motion instead of a Motion and a memo of law in state court. It is unclear to me how she did this, but the reason that I didn’t catch it is that because we were on a time crunch, she only brought me two signature pages to sign instead of the whole document… When I realized what had gone wrong, I told my boss and was careful not to assign blame to anyone, but he essentially told me that since I had signed the document, I was responsible for whatever happened to it…. which s u c k s, but makes total sense to me.
Anonymous
That is true, but she will also be blamed for. It handling things she’s not getting. If the assistant is the problem, she must be dealt with. That was, in fairness, your fault. That’s not what’s going on here.
Anonymous
I’d talk to the other associates, see if she’s like this with them, then go as a group/have the senior-most associate present the issue to the managing assistant. (Our assistants are divided into two teams with their own managing assistants – the assistants who’ve been here for decades and don’t tolerate any nonsense.)
Best Buys under $30
Whether it’s a clothing item, travel item, toiletry, or something that just makes your life easier, tell us your favorite thing(s) that cost under $30! (bonus points for including links)
Anonymous
DH and I are addicted to buying kitchen gadgets… a recent purchase we’ve been loving is an egg cooker. It makes a perfect hardboiled egg in 5 minutes, really easy to prep and clean up. I’ve been making it in the morning, running out the door, and eating it at work and its great.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00DDXWFY0/ref=sxts_sxwds-bia_1?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_p=d754fdf0-fd52-4edd-8917-8e65a84c20d5&pd_rd_wg=YRq0I&pf_rd_r=2F7ZGJABRYFT72JX20DD&pf_rd_s=desktop-sx-top-slot&pf_rd_t=301&pd_rd_i=B00DDXWFY0&pd_rd_w=tCdKn&pf_rd_i=egg+cooker&pd_rd_r=54c301d5-6ed4-4579-8f95-da7d1b67b391&ie=UTF8&qid=1534430178&sr=1
Anonymous
Well I just added that to my cart. My husband loves my egg salad and asks me to make it every week – this should make it easy!
Senior Attorney
OMG this looks amazing. I am ordering it right now.
Gail the Goldfish
This isn’t a particular item per se, but buying duplicates of all my toiletries/makeup and just leaving my makeup bag packed has been a huge time saver when packing for frequent work travel.
Belle Boyd
I do this every year when we open our camp and just leave the bag at camp. It’s so much easier to head to the mountains on a whim when I know that most all of what I need is already there – I just have to throw some clothes in a bag, some food in a cooler, and some gas in the car and off I go!
C
I might be the last person on earth to discover this and it’s way under $30, but I replaced my sponge dish with this thing a few weeks ago and it’s ridiculous how much I like it. I hate a gross sponge on top of the sink and the corner design helps me keep from accidentally knocking off the suction cups the way I did with other styles.
https://www.target.com/p/scotch-brite-plastic-sponge-holder/-/A-14903480
lsw
wow I am totally going to get this!
KateMiddletown
Does it stay up? We have one that is constantly slipping down the side of the sink.
C
So far I haven’t had any problems! I think the plastic makes it more lightweight than the ones made of metal.
Puddlejumper
Tempur-pedic sleep mask
Diva cup
Vim and Vigr Compression Socks for the plane ride
Mophie
GoToob travel liquids bottles
Good Socks – smart wool no matter what the season
shhhhower cap (this might be over 30)
Bumble and Bumble prêt a powder as dry shampoo
Muji plastic zip cases for protecting important papers while traveling from water
Uniqlo heat tech long underwear layers when traveling places where the weather is cold
When renting a car we always bring a USB charger that goes into the cigarette charger of a car and then a auxiliary cable so we can listen to podcasts/playlists from our phone to the car speakers
Oh and eagle creek packing bags + an extra empty one that is red to put all our dirty clothes in.
And the best thing ever: I spent 5 dollars a few years ago on a rain proof backpack cover from Amazon. And it has SAVED my life. Its so small and compact and anytime its raining I don’t have to worry that the stuff inside my backpack is going to get wet.
Also always pack a pen for filling out landing cards.
SFAttorney
Great list! Thanks.
lsw
Might not fit your parameters but I’ve been thinking lately about how buying canned chicken at Costco has vastly changed my life for the better. My toddler loves it so it’s an easy protein for his lunch, and I can throw it in tons of dishes to give it a protein boost. My tween also loves it and is a picky eater so it’s good to just get some food in her. I have no idea how the price compares to chicken generally but the convenience factor is just amazing.
I recently bought one of those “soap saver” things that lifts the soap above the water in the dish and why didn’t I buy one of these years ago?
Belle Boyd
They may be over $30 depending on the model, but Rain-X wiper blades are the best things ever made for a car. They make your windshield look like a hi-def screen!
Also, duplicate phone chargers — again, depending on your phone, they may be more than $30, but I keep one at home, one at work, one in my car (with one of those USB ports that fits into the cigarette lighter/power port,) and one at our camp. It may seem excessive, but I always have a phone charger handy when needed and don’t have to worry about remembering to take one with me.
Cookbooks
Silicone wine stoppers. I picked them up from a little stationery store for $1 a piece. They aren’t fancy but they work fantastically. They’ve worked pretty well with beer bottles, too.
JS
Waterproof command hooks for loofahs – I have a weird shower where suctions cups and over the shower head organizers both don’t work.
Lace pasties – so much more comfortable and unnoticeable than silicone
Waterbottle brush with straw brush attached – http://a.co/istx8h1
Waterproof outdoor blanket – http://a.co/4UWbWKw
Wet brush (get the brand name one)
Rainbow Hair
Wow when do you use pasties?! My life is seeming so vanilla.
JS
I love wrap tops and dresses for the weekend and haaate adjusting a bra or finding a bra that works for each slightly different wrap. I usually wear them at least once a weekend!
pugsnbourbon
I just started using them this summer, too! Plain fabric, though, and I call them nipple stickers. The silicone ones feel weird.
Rainbow Hair
Ohhhh for under-clothes wear not display! Maybe when I get that reduction…
Fishie
A set of $10 packing cubes and pouches purchased on Amazon (bonus that the little pouches, which are blue with pink flowers, say “SECRET POUCH” in all caps on them)
A roll-up kit for all of my electronics (usb, usb plugs, car plugs, aux cable, charging brick, headphones, extra outlets) for when I travel.
A roll-up toiletry kit that I keep stocked with sample sizes so I never have to pack/unpack it.
$10 Ozark tumbler (and a <$20 1/2 gallon jug) that keeps my drinks cold all day.
Ziplock compression bags for packing dirty stuff, and vaccum bags for storing out of season clothes/bedding.
C
Link to the packing cubes/pouches?
C2
An air vent phone mount for the car: https://amzn.to/2PdAkij
If you have flat dash space, there are mounts that stick direct to the dash, as well as mounts for pop sockets.
Jules
+1 on the car air vent phone mount; DS gave me one he got for probably $4 at his corner bodega, I love it
A heated hair brush/straightener that smoothes my hair beautifully
A radio/Bluetooth speaker for the shower (Ion brand, no long available on Amazon, sadly)
A cold brew coffee maker (not automatic; it has a filter in the middle that is filled with grounds and just sits in the fridge for 24 hours)
Anonymous
Baggu reusable nylon bags for grocery shopping and general catch-all bag. I swear I’m not a shill for them, but I love them because of their fun designs and they fold up easily into a small pouch so I can keep one in my purse at all times.
Anonymous
Any attorneys out there make the switch from having court appearances most days to an in office position? I’m in a handful of venues most days and generally love running around courtrooms and hearings. But I’ve been at my job for a while and my boss’s boss has hinted I’d be a good supervisor, which would mean every day in the office. I know I want to move up but I hate the idea of giving up the freedom of appearances (and the not-infrequent early end to my workday) for a nine to five.
Any insight?
Anonymous
You are the only attorney I have ever heard say that being in court all the time = “freedom” and short hours.
Anonymous
I’m in house insurance defense. It’s pretty common not to return from an afternoon appearance.
Sandy
I moved recently from in court all the time to an in house role. It’s a big change honestly to go to being a desk person. I’m adjusting and it was the right move professionally but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss the thrill of trial work.
Rainbow Hair
I did that. I love the predictability of the 8 to 5 schedule, and the chance to do more collaborative work, and to interact with colleagues. Sitting on my butt all day kinda sucks in comparison to running back and forth to court, just like, how-my-body-feels-wise, but I like everything about being in house better.
trefoil
Late to this, but yes. I went from 4-5 court days a week, and averaging about 500 km in travel to an entirely office position. At first, I missed the flexibility and the independence, but now, after three years, I value the quiet and the routine and knowing that I can leave at 5 instead of finishing a trial at 8 pm and driving 200 km home. I’m working fewer weekends and evenings (but not zero) and have found my stress levels have gone down considerably (I can count panic attacks on one hand, instead of a regular 4 am anxiety spiral). I sometimes get bored with the lack of spontaneity but i’ve managed to work around it by doing additional out of office things, including filling in for other offices, teaching and presenting to stakeholders.
Anon
I have always had a weird stomach, but my stomach issues are getting weirder. I love food, but almost every time after I eat a meal I feel nauseous, even if I only eat a few bites. I also have problems with regularity and often have to take multiple otc laxatives to go normally. On average I go 3-4x a week, and I feel like it should be daily to be comfortable. What kind of doctor would I go to about this? Is this a GP thing, or a specialist thing? If specialist, what kind? I’m in the DC area if anyone has specific recs but I’m more interested in figuring out whether I need a specialist.
Anonymous
A GI doctor.
Anon
I’m not in DC, but it sounds like you need to see a Gastroenterologist. I’m dealing with some chronic GI issues right now, and it’s so tough, so wishing you the best of luck dealing with this!
nuqotw
GP, who will refer you to (probably) a gastroenterologist if necessary.
anon
You will need a GI doctor probably but you can start with your GP to get a referral if you need that.
BTW having a BM 3-4 times a week is normal for some people.
Needing to take laxatives regularly – not normal. So you will need to get that sorted out. It might take a while to teach your body to go without the laxatives if thats become a habit for you.
If you are feeling constipated up your water intake, fiber and movement such as long walks and that should help.
Anon
And go in with data. Write out what you are eating. When your BMs are. What meds you are taking when. How much water you are drinking. These appointments are really hard if they don’t have something to work off of. So call in your appointment. Chances are they can’t see you for a month and spend that month documenting everything. What did you eat, how soon did you feel nauseous etc. It sounds like a hassle but it really helps cut down time when looking for answers.
Anonymous
For me the right doctor was ultimately a neurologist (since there turned out to be a neurological issue underlying the gastroparesis), but I saw a gastroenterologist to begin with. I mention both specialists because it took my medical team a long, long time to connect the dots and get me proper treatment, so be persistent about wanting better than this; don’t just grin and bear it if you see a doctor who acts like it’s not a big deal.
Anon
+1 to this. Advocate for yourself. GI issues are tricky and often overlap with other issues. If something doesn’t sound right to you, or you feel like you’re getting the brush off, go see someone else.
Velma
I’m not suggesting this is your medical problem, but what you’re describing echoes my teenager’s symptoms as she developed an eating disorder. Restricting food led to gastroparesis–in her case, nausea and serious constipation. It may be worth looking into gastroparesis, which has many causes.
Anonymous
Are you bloated at all or have a lot of pelvic pressure? I recently found out I had a fibroid that was pushing on top of my uterus, as well as my intestines and rectum, which made me nauseous, extremely bloated and constipated. I had it removed a few weeks ago and feel brand new. Just a thought.
AnonPara
About a year ago I found out I am allergic to dairy (after eating it most days for my entire life – I’m 49). Eliminating dairy has completely changed my GI system. My chronic constipation also reversed itself, to the point where I am needing much more fiber. Which is sometimes its own issue…
Anonymous
You need to see a GI doc.
I will say, my experience with one was not good – he basically was like “you have IBS and need immunosuppressant drugs” after my tests came back, wasn’t really willing to talk through ANY other options.
I was having very similar symptoms to what you describe. I was using suppositories rather than laxatives, but I basically could not go without them and I had a lot of bloating, gas, and abdominal pain. Got to the point where I would call into work rather than going to work and spending an hour or more in the bathroom.
I declined the immunosuppressants and I went on an elimination diet and then went low FODMAP. I found out I can’t eat gluten, any artificial sweeteners (also agave), bananas, beans, and a couple of other things (anything with inulin in it is an absolute no-go; that goes double if the item also has sugar alcohols). I also pretty much only can do cultured dairy, hardly any milk or ice cream.
Anon
What’s your favorite brand of sheets for when you want to splurge? I’m dreaming of luxurious bedding, but I don’t know where to start…
LadyB
Under Armour Recovery Sheets. These don’t scream luxury, but I have never slept better! They feel nice, don’t get hot, and uses far infared technology to help your muscles recover while you sleep.
BB
Yves Delorme. They go on sale pretty frequently at the end of seasons. They are better than any luxury hotel sheets I have experienced.
ChandraNH
I have a rough linen summer cover which is glorious. It’s huge and gets softer and softer. I also have The Company Store percale sheets (to keep me cool – hot flashes over here!!!) which are so nice and crisp and lovely and a set of linen sheets from the Company Store as well, that I also love.
One thing to read up on is the fallacy of high thread counts.
Dealtwiththis
Jennifer Adams Home. I slept on them at a B&B and had to have them. They are so silky soft.
Horse Crazy
I need to make a Rosh Hashanah dessert for 20 people. I really want to make this pound cake (https://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/ina-garten/honey-vanilla-pound-cake-recipe-1925091), and I want to make an apple compote or something apple-y to put on top of it – any suggestions? Or any other ideas for apple/honey dessert?
Anonymous
I’ve made this a couple times for Rosh Hashanah: https://smittenkitchen.com/2014/09/sunken-apple-and-honey-cake/
Horse Crazy
Oooh that looks delicious! Thanks!!
Scarlett
I like the blog Chai and Home for ideas – http://www.chaiandhome.com
Horse Crazy
Omg this is such a great blog! Thanks for the find!!
Horse Crazy
I’m really going down the rabbit hole with this blog now…
Scarlett
I did the same thing!! Glad you like it :-)
C
Apple compote on the Ina Garten cake would be delicious! I’d follow a recipe for apple pie filling but chop the apples up fairly small- think the size of tomatoes in chunky salsa- to make a more pleasant compote.
You could also strain out the liquid after making the pie filling to make an apple glaze, then poke holes with a skewer or toothpick in the cake and soak it with the glaze. To serve, top each slice with apples remaining from the strained pie filling. Pie filling recipe in link to follow.
Horse Crazy
That sounds heavenly. Thank you so much! Your link doesn’t seem to have posted yet, but I have an apple pie filling recipe, so no worries. Thanks again!
Lobbyist
This cake is great and easy to make. I never use frosting on it. You could do your own honey glaze.
https://www.marthastewart.com/313216/apple-cinnamon-bundt-cake
rosie
The Smitten Kitchen majestic moist honey cake recipe is amazing. Not apple & honey, but soooo delicious. It’s what I make every year. To incorporate an apple element I’d maybe do some kind of ice cream or maybe an apple caramel sauce.
Wales
Just beginning to plan a trip for DH and I to the south end of Wales–from Gloucestershire (where family is) over to Pembrokeshire. So far the waterfall area in the national park looks like a can’t miss. Any other recommendations? We both love nature, but aren’t in the peak of health for strenuous exploration. He likes historical sites, the older the better–I like little towns where I can get to know the character.
Anon
What’s the general rule of thumb for how big an emergency fund should be these days? My friend is saying 3 months, but that seems really low to me. I had always heard 6+ months of living expenses minimum.
the current rule
It used to be 6 months, now it’s somewhere between 8-12, some say that anything more than 16 months worth should be placed into a retirement account or savings account with interest.
Make sure to include all of the bills plus anything you really rely on (whether it’s highest speed internet or car maintenance services), so you’re including the monthly cost of everything you feel you couldn’t live without, even if it includes things others might see as splurges.
nuqotw
Depends on your comfort level and life situation. 3 months if you are comfortable with a little less cushion / are in an in-demand field; 6 months is fine too. I wouldn’t go over 12 myself.
Anonymous
We have probably a year of expenses, but it’s a relatively small amount of money (~$25k) – our house and student loans are paid off, so if we gave up vacations and dining out we could make $25k last for a really long time. But generally I would agree with 6 months as the standard.
Scarlett
It depends on how long you could realistically replace your income. For professional jobs that’s often a longer search than 3 months.
DCR
It varies depending on how secure your job is and how hard it would be to find a new position. For example, as a government attorney, I have a very secure job where it would be hard to fire me. So, my emergency fund is currently 5 months. When I was in biglaw, it was a less secure job and, if I got fired because of a bad economy, could be very hard to find a new position. Then, my emergency fund was 12 months of basic expenses (i.e., a bare bones budget).
Having said that, 6+ is pretty common advice.
Anon
I try to keep 20k in my MCOL city.
Anonymous
I keep about 6 months. I’m married and it’s unlikely both DH and I would lose our jobs at the same time and would be fine on one of our’s income. If I was single, I’d probably keep closer to a year, because the recession is still a somewhat painful memory.
Anonymous
We have $50k. This is really high and you may not find it necessary at all, and I recently increased it actually. It used to be $30k, but in the past year we had to replace a car (it was parked on the street and totaled in a hit and run) and our AC (it was old but not so old I was expecting it to completely quit the way it did), to the tune of $20k in unplanned emergency expenses. If one or both of us had been out of work during that period, we might have been in for a serious struggle there for awhile. So we decided that $30k was not enough for me to feel comfortable and increased it.
Houda
My comfort level is 9 months because in my head, I need ready money to move to another country, cover my usual expenses and potentially network or update my wardrobe. Once I have more than that I’ll just invest the money where it’s tied and I don’t think about it. This said, I am in the UK where I don’t worry as much about medical bills if the emergency is health related.
Anonymous
We just decided on $40K. Recently married in HCOL city. I actually kept closer to $45K when it was just me (BigLaw associate), but my husband is extremely employable and we think it’s pretty unlikely that both of us will be out of work at the same time and for a long period. That said, we could last about a year with $40K on a bare bones budget, and we have a lot more savings in a brokerage account that we could access in a truly dire case.
Anonymous
Liquid savings = 3 months if you’re in a couple and both employed, 6 months if you’re single or only one in the couple works. Anything on top of that should be invested.
lsw
Suggestions for best undereye concealer if you don’t wear other makeup? I either wear nothing or just Hourglass powder but my dark circles are staring at me. I think they are more apparently with my new glasses.
Anon
Tr1sh McEv0y has a product called instant eye lift that you put under your eyes in her “triangle of light” technique. You dab it in a triangle from each corner of your eye down to a point by the side of your nose and then blend. You do it before any foundation. I do this before I put on my tinted sunscreen and it’s enough for me that i don’t wear any other foundation or concealer. In fact, if I’m going out after work, i just reapply this stuff and I’m ready to go.
It’s less of a thick concealer and more of a thin liquid that very subtly bounces light.
Anonymous
Maybelline Age Rewind. Love love love.
Which one
question on Age Rewind – which color/tone do you use when you use it alone with no other makeup?
Anonymous
I really like Becca undereye brightening corrector, it cancels out my dark circles but doesn’t look like I’m wearing makeup.
LK
The Estee Lauder Perfectionist Youth-Infusing Brightening Serum + Concealer is the only thing that covers my (genetic) dark circles, and it also looks natural. One side is concealer and one side is a brightening highlighter, but it doesn’t look like you have a highlighter on.
Hilton Head Help
Piggybacking on an earlier post this week, what do you wise women recommend for lodging in the Hilton Head/Savannah area for a 4 night weekend in late September? It will be DH and myself (late 50s) and DD (early 30s) to celebrate their birthdays. Looking to spend time at the beach and/or pool, some golf, some touring around. I spent way too many hours going down the VRBO vs. hotel resort rabbit hole last night and could use general and/or specific recommendations on lodging and don’t miss things to do. TIA!
RGH
These 2 places have been discussed a lot in recent months. The search function doesn’t seem to work, but just do a regular google search of this sit e plus hilton head, etc. Lots came up for me.
mascot
HHI and Savannah are a decent drive from one another (70 minutes or so one way depending on where you are on HHI) so you might want to look at spending maybe 1 night in Sav and seeing the sights there and then spend the rest of your time on HHI for beach and golf. The Historic District in Savannah has plenty of hotel and B&B options that are easy walking distance to sights/restaurants/bars.
Hilton Head Help
Good advice – thanks!!
Anonymous
Forgive this non-coffee drinker for this question :) I’ve seen those to-go coffee boxes from Panera, but there’s not one near us. Are there other restaurants that have group-sized prepared coffee to-go?
anon
Starbucks does this!
Anonymous
Starbucks and Dunkin Donuts for sure.
Anonymous
Bagel places like Einstein or Bruegger’s do too!
Anonymous
Agree with Starbucks, and I think maybe Dunkin Donuts too?
some more
Whole Foods, Dunkin Donuts, Krispy Kreme should all have them as well.
Anonymous
Dunkin Donuts and Einstein Bagels does as well.
Anonymous
Most coffee shops do, IME.
If I assume correctly that you are providing coffee for a group, consider asking if the coffee shop will provide paper cups and a selection of sweeteners/creamers for the same cost as the large order of coffee. Some will, and it can save you a lot of hassle.
Baconpancakes
Many local coffee shops will do this as well. You’d be surprised; ask them!
Masshol3
Dunks!
Anonymous
Posted this yesterday and couldn’t check back in. Thanks for the advice and I’ll take any more that others can offer. To the person who said — if you want to go back into the fast lane, consider you’d be going with better perspective, I hope you’re right. Having had a job that I liked and having lost it unexpectedly — it hurt for a long time but ultimately I landed another job (that I dislike) and I am generally ok. So part of me feels like if I take a chance, it doesn’t work out my view now will be — so what else is new??
Post:
If anything knocked you off the career ladder — burn out; bad boss/awful environment; getting passed over for a promotion; a layoff — anything really. How did you get back on that horse? Or did you never get back on? Like most here, I was one of those hard charging types, got knocked off, decided I was burnt out and a 40 hour week job would be good for a few years, and now I find myself wanting to get back to my hard charging self and then simultaneously terrified or feeling like – why bother, I’ll probably just get laid off/won’t make it in a hard charging job again. Anyone go thru this? I know the right answer would’ve been ignore the burn out and go right into another hard situation – but I can’t turn back the hands of time. (And in case people ask I know I could stay with my regular job but I’m not happy – bored, no promotion potential, find myself missing the old work.)
Anonymous
Red and brown marks on your skin post acne and picking (yes, i know; its an anxiety response).
What products might make them go away faster? I’m not interested in trying a lot of things – only something that will really work. Ive read salicyclic acid and other BHAs are best. I have fair skin and the Marks are faded brown
Anon
I LOVE the Azelaic Acid from the Ordinary. I had red marks and texture issues and it was really a game-changer.
Resident Skincare Junkie
It sounds like what you’re dealing with is Post Inflammatory Hyperpigmentation (PIH). To get rid of it your goal is to increase cell turnover, there’s a couple ways to accomplish this. BHA is one way but probably the least effective. I would recommend using AHA (lactic or glycolic acid- check out Pixi Glow Tonic or ones from The Ordinary). Vitamin C serum, be careful to research what you’re buying because it has to have a certain Ph to be effective-I recommend the Paulas Choice one, Timeless, or Mae Love Glowmaker. Retinoid/retinol, I recommend The Ordinary Granactive Retinoid 2% Emulsion. If you’re really serious check out Curology, they will give you a prescription strength retinoid for $20/month. I’ve been using it for 4 years and love it.
EM84
Try one or combo of the following as it depends on what what works best for you and what your skin tolerates best: salicylic acid 2% and up, glycolic acid 10% and up, benzoyl peroxide 5% and up, azelaic acid 20% and up. From my experience, glycolic acid and benzoyl peroxide can be more irritating and/or drying.
I had best results with using Paula’s Choice BHA Liquid 2% twice daily and following up with azelaic acid cream. Glycolic did nothing for my discolorations. Benzoyl was great for a week, then it became too drying and I was not a fan of the incidental bleached spots on my pyjamas.
Anon
BHA from the Ordinary (they are all good) and Nadinola bleaching cream. Also, if you already have these at home try pureeing a couple vitamin C pills and aspirin in even proportion with a little water to use as a mask or scrub. This is really simple to try and worked very well for my pale skin with acne marks.
Anon
I want to thank the women here who recommended Madam Secretary last week. I’ve been binge-watching it ever since! It’s so great to watch a show with a strong female lead with a high-powered job. I also like how the show involves her husband and kids, but not as the primary focus (and talk about a dream marriage, too). So, thanks again for the rec!
Horse Crazy
Right? Bess and Henry are marriage goals. I love that show soooo much! The new season starts October 5th and I CANNOT WAIT.
Anonymous
I was also really impressed by their marriage in the first season :). Love that show.
Anonymous
And they are a couple in real life! So cute!
Charleston
Can anyone talk to me about raising a family in Charleston, SC? We live in NC, so I’m looking for tips on suburb areas around Charleston, COL, public schools, major employers in the area, etc. Husband has an opportunity to relocate there for work. I’m in law, but would likely use this move to get out of traditional practice.
Anonymous
In CLT but have BFF who is from there (her sister is raising kids there now).
1. Check out private school costs and how many people at your husband’s office use them vs public. That was an eye-opener for them, how “done” it was in some circles and that is was not inexpensive.
2. The bugs are enormous. Even nice people have them.
3. If you aren’t in downtown Chuck, housing is a lot less. Not sure how tied to geography you are.
4. “Society” can be remarkably closed and yet shockingly open (I know someone on the symphony board there who loved music but only had a high school education and worked in a blue collar field, no family $). Discuss.
5. The economy is broader and more diverse than it has ever been (same with Greenville/Spartanburg). My friend moved to Atlanta b/c of this and while I’d have loved to have landed there after school, it wasn’t an option when I got out of law school. Many more people want to live there vs can find jobs there still, so your kids may not live there as grownups (they may be in CLT/ATL/Raleigh instead).
6. In law, look to RE/finance/hospitality-type things. Someone finances and refinances all of those hotels / golf resorts / apartment buildings not just in Chuck but throughout the state. The sort of people who go to CREFC and NAREIT conferences seem to be gainfully employed there. I don’t know about other fields.
7. The people on Southern Charm are a joke, even worse then Jersey Shore. Most of them aren’t even from Charleston.
Anonymous
Personally, I’d recommend the CLT or Triangle area if you’re already in NC. The Triangle area especially has great public schools and job opportunities is many industries (not sure what field you’re in), though COL has gone up since I last lived there.
Anonymous
I grew up in Charleston, and agree with much of what Anonymous at 2:44 said. My family is from there, and I’m in law…I haven’t been able to move back (yet) because legal jobs pay SO much less in Charleston than in other cities (i.e., Charlotte/ATL/DC). But, you want to get out of law, and your husband has a job, that’s not a problem. I get the feeling that there are not a lot of dual-income, professional couples with kids that live in Charleston. Most of my friends who live there are looking to stop working after they get married.
Charleston is still very much focused on tourism and real estate. Boeing is there, and they are attracting more companies, but healthcare and real estate seem to be some of the few professional jobs that you can find in Charleston.
It can be VERY snobby and closed off. It can take years to get in with the old-money, tight-knit downtown Charleston crowd. If you’re looking at where to live, Mount Pleasant probably has the best schools. It’s getting expensive, quickly, though. Sullivan’s Island and Isle of Palms are good options too, but also expensive.
San Francisco hotels - where to stay
Thanks for all of the great travel recommendations and suggestions from this site. We will be on vacation next week in California, doing a few days in Santa Cruz and San Francisco will fly out of SFO. We are looking for where to stay last two nights in San Francisco. We have Marriott/Starwood status so looked at Hotel Adagio, Autograph Collection or Fairmont San Francisco, Nob Hill with American Express Fine Hotels. Your thoughts?
Scarlett
I don’t know the other places, but the Fairmont is just lovely & classic – I would totally stay there. Little known fact, but they filmed Gone with the Wind on the staircase there (it was redone for the movie & they sent the whole production crew out there making it one of the most expensive movies at the time).
Anonymous
I’m visiting a friend who is in maternity leave (baby #2). What should I bring over that she would appreciate? I’m not a mom so I’m not sure what she would like. I know she will just be excited to have some adult company, but I was thinking a small something would be nice as well.
Anonymous
A healthy meal she can feed herself and her family for dinner!
Anon
+1. Bonus points for being able to hold the food with one hand.
anon.
Candy – bulk gummies if she likes those, special macarons or chocolates, etc.
Pints of ice cream
Fresh fruit
C
I found out this morning that I have been selected to attend a week long visit to a very important client with a few others that are working on a project for them. (I’m excited!) I’m told that the attire for this visit is of the suit and pantyhose variety. I need some help in how to pack for this visit. We will be there 5 days. I have three suits today all three skirts and have the dress option for two. Can this work for my trip or should I buy a fourth suit? How many pairs of pantyhose should I pack? (Incidently a coworker told me that this client’s office is frigid with the a/c so hose isn’t a bad idea anyway). I wear my suits occasionally today but just not used to five days in a row of them let alone packing for it. Help!
anon
Women still wear pantyhose??? I was just saying recently that I hope I never ever have to wear again in my entire life.
Anonymous
To me pantyhose are a must wear. They make me feel pulled together. Out of fashion? Maybe…but I am never cold in office, no shoe issues, and never have to worry about being underdressed. I know they get a lot of hate–but to me it’s unwarranted. Nude hose FTW.
Anon
I am with you. I sincerely don’t understand how people wear work shoes over bare feet. I need that barrier. And hose helps conceal the many bruises on my legs from my exciting life outside of work.
Anonymous
+1000
Velma
Certainly three suits will be enough! For that sort of trip, I would travel with two (in dark, nondescript colors) and change things up with scarf/jewelry and different shell-style tops, which I handwash in the hotel sink as needed. It would be nice to bring one dress for dinners or as an option under the suit.
Focus on comfortable shoes–probably two options–and be ready to walk (from the office to dinner, around the hotel, around town …). I bring one low/wedge + one higher heel.
Yeah, bring the pantyhose, but you may find you can get along without them. Wear a pair on the first day and assess. Good luck!
Anon
I think three suits would work for five days. I’d wear each one once the first three days, then alternate in the dress you didn’t already wear with the jacket you already wore once. So Monday wear the skirt suit with a shirt that has enough of a sleeve to guard the pits to keep it fresh, then spray it to freshen and hang. Wear that same suit jacket again on Thursday with the dress option. Repeat with the Tuesday or Wednesday suit on Friday. I am very hard on pantyhose and always snag them, so I’d bring as many pairs as I could. Is 10 too many? Ha
NYCer
You definitely do not need a 4th suit. You literally could wear the same (one) suit every day with a different shirt a be fine. I hate to say “that’s what men do” – but that is what men who wear suits to work every day do.
Anonymous
+1. Not only should you not buy a 4th suit, I’d reconsider bringing all 3 if you’re flying. You need to fit everything in a carry on so as not to slow down the group on the flight.
Ann
I am secretly rather judge-y about anyone who checks bags for professional travel. It’s a hassle for everyone. And younger women, in particular, may risk appearing inexperienced, high-maintenance, and less competent if they require lots of luggage to do business for a few days. Two jackets should fit easily in a carry-on–or make do with a suit + a a few coordinates. No one will remember or care.
Anonymous
One pair of hose for each day. Assuming you are not headed to the outback-if you run into an issue, there will be ways to buy more. Often hotels have decent quality hose in their sundry store (assuming a downtown mid to upper level hotel–Hampton Inn–not so much). Worst case is a pair of Leggs from Walgreens / CVS in a pinch. You have more important things to worry about than hose.
Anon
Best hose selection here: thestylishfox.com
They have low-rise hose!
Eastern NC
I know that there are folks here from Eastern NC. How is it doing? My parents are from there but moved away due to jobs / schools / etc. I do love the area and am sort of rooting for it from DC. I love to visit and do when I can. Is it realistic to think that things will improve there as Raleigh expands from the west, ECU/Greenville area is a medical hub, and Wilmington grows? I mean, even Kinston and Tarboro have breweries now. I would so love to move there but other than be a 100% telecommuter (which I’d hate, I need people around me), I don’t know if it works or would ever (but I hope so).
FWIW, the schools are so bad in my family’s hometown that my cousin is homeschooling and we are like the least likely people to do that, ever. But now that the state lifted charter school limits, maybe even that will change for the better?
anon
I live in eastern NC now; grew up in the triangle. I love where I live, but there are trade offs and I wouldn’t live just anywhere in eastern NC. I think the Greenville and Wilmington areas will continue to grow, but a lot of eastern NC is the same as it ever was, or is dying off. Yes, Kinston has a brewery and Vivian Howard, but other than that little block of downtown, people are not coming to Kinston.
The big trade off in the county I live in is lack of arts/culture and lack of jobs for high earners. Most of the high income folks here are self-employed, work in long standing family businesses, or for the military/DOD. We also have a serious opioid problem, a lot of poverty, and average healthcare. If I had cancer or a serious medical condition, I would be going to ECU or the triangle for my medical care. I suspect I could make a lot more money in the triangle, but I like my work-life balance here. Luckily the public schools in my county are quite strong.
And…my pocket of eastern NC is a hotbed of Trump supporters.
GVegas
I actually just moved to Greenville a month ago. Originally from Raleigh but moving from Charlotte, it’s certainly a different pace but I was still very surprised about what is going on here. The hospital is enormous and in conjunction with ECU keeps the city rolling. Overall, I think Greenville specifically has solid growth in its future. However, I do 100% telecommute from my RTP-based job and I’m not sure what luck I’ll have finding something else here when I’m ready to move on in the immediate future. The earning potential here is either high (doctors, attorneys, business owners) or very low, with very few rungs on the ladder between them. Schools are still mediocre and we’ll be opting for private for our kids, but the low COL here gives us room in the budget to do that without real pain. As for the truly rural portions of ENC, though, I don’t see improvement.
bellatrix
Currently in CLT, lived in Greensboro for nearly 20 years, but not an NC native for what that’s worth: From what I can tell, the state’s position on charters is being affected by a few Charlotte suburbs who want to start their own charters. Basically a way to get around being part of Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools. So I’d be wary of making decisions based on charter school availability, because it may be a bargaining chip in the legislature down the line. Just throwing that out there.