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Updated: Nov 27, 2023 130 Comments · by

Tuesday’s TPS Report: Tonal Plaid Cardigan Sweater

The Personal Shopper (TPS)

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Magaschoni Tonal Plaid Cardigan Sweater | Corporette

Our daily TPS reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.

I'm into misty white things right now, apparently, and this tonal cardigan sweater from Magaschoni has me drooling.

The plaid! The silk/nylon/polyester/cashmere blend (with instructions to hand wash rather than dry clean)! The long ribbed sleeves! Gorgeous.

I'd avoid black pants — even a black pencil skirt seems less boring — but that's me.

The sweater is $278 at Bloomingdale's. Magaschoni Tonal Plaid Cardigan Sweater

Seen a great piece you'd like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.

(L-4)

Sales of note for 9.30.24

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

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Kat Griffin is the founder, publisher, and editor-in-chief of Corporette. You can read more about her here.

Comments

  1. houda

    I would wear this with charcoal bottoms. These days, I am also into the white and cobalt combo.

    • Sydney Bristow

      I’ve been super into gray lately so I’d also really like this with charcoal. I really like this sweater.

    • Ellen

      Yay! Great Cardigan Sweater, Kat, but I have to watch it w/sweater’s b/c they get tight around (and therefore highlight) the tuchus. Beside’s haveing to wear a cami make’s me look even bigger up top and that is NOT the look I am goeing for. But still, this IS a nice sweater!

      The janitor in the building keep’s comeing in and stareing at me. I am not sure what he is so interested in. I am only one of many very attractive women that I know are in the building b/c I see them get in the elevators. He stopped by and said his name was Bob. I remember a guy named Bob from college, and he had VERY thick glasses. Bob liked me, but he also liked my suitemates b/c we would talk to him and give him Cheeto’s. He kind of had orange teeth b/c of all the cheeto’s we gave him, but no one ever dated him that I can remember. I hope this guy does NOT start comeing in and eateing cheeto’s. FOOEY!

      I have to file 3 breif’s today for court Thursday. I am behind b/c of the Passover Weekend, where I was in Chapaqua all weekend. I did NOT even bill for Saturday or Sunday, so I have alot of billeings to catch up on. The Supermarkit guy’s are sendeing there new in-house council to observe me in court. I hope he is smart enough NOT to give me any pointer’s b/c the judge like’s me JUST the way I am and Frank say’s my record with him is almost perfect. That is the story of my life — almost. I almost have a boyfreind, I almost got into University of Pennsylveania Law, I almost had an acountant for a husband, and I almost had kid’s and was abel to live in Chapaqua with a place on Park Avenue and the Hamton’s. I am NOT compleaining, it is just that Rosa has all this and all she has is a BA degree. But she is svelte and that is what Ed like’s tho it does not explain why he needed a floozy to play with his winkie in a strip club. FOOEY on that!

      I hope to be abel to get all of those thing’s soon, so that I would NOT have to proove myself over and over again in front of all these peeople. FOOEY! IN the mean time, tho, I do have alot to be thankful for. I do have a great job with a great boss and make very good money and have a great apartement and dad pay’s all my bill’s for me so I can focus on LEGAL thing’s! But I do want a decent guy who will respect me for my MIND and NOT ooooogle me for my body or squeeze my tuchus. That is all I want. YAY!!!!!

  3. Party Planner

    Has anyone been to a fun bachelorette party lately? Looking to plan something a little different. Alcohol is ok, just looking for something a little more laid back than a night of bar hopping. It’s a group of about 12 and in Minneapolis in May if any locals have specific suggestions!

    • TheElms

      What about an activity – like a paint and wine type party? Or dinner theater — one of those solve a mystery type dinner theaters. I took flying trapeze lessons at mine which was hysterical before going out to a fancy dinner.

    • Sydney Bristow

      I’m planning one for my best friend right now. We are planning to go kayaking earlier in the day then a bus will pick us up and take us to 3 different breweries for tastings and tours. It’s a company in the Bay Area that runs it. Maybe there is something similar where you are.

      My own party will be super low key. Friends are coming over to watch wedding movies (Father of the Bride and Bridesmaids probably) and drink champagne and eat pizza. It’s exactly what I wanted to do.

      • Zelda

        My sister had a similar party, except sub board games for the movies. Pizza is her favorite food, so she was happy! One of my friends had an old-fashioned pajama party with plenty of wine and food and girl talk.

        Another fun/silly idea is to do a a group pole dancing class.

      • Baconpancakes

        Your friend’s party sounds AMAZING. Kayaking and beer? If I ever get married, will you plan my bachelorette?

        But yours sounds like exactly the low-key party I’d love to attend the weekend after mine. :-)

        • Sydney Bristow

          I can’t take credit for the brewery idea. I found a wine train option and one of the other bridesmaids found the brewery tour bus. Beer and kayaking pretty much sum up my best friend though so it was an easy party to plan!

          And I’m glad you like both. Her party is about 2 months before mine and there will be some overlap of guests :-)

    • Mpls

      Pedal Pub – you need a larger group (who can reach the pedals) to keep the cart going, though May could be iffy with the weather.

      Actually did a canoe down the St. Croix (up around Taylors Fall), but again, May might be cold to be on the water.

      Mani/pedi happy hour – cocktails and nail polish.

      Dive bar karaoke (1029 bar in NE has a nice system, and good Smash Shack food)

      I’ve known groups to go to ComedySportz (Calhoun Square in Uptown), and the bride-to-be gets to play in one of the improv skits they do.

      Gasthof’s – 9-12 on Saturday you can polka with some old folks before the music switches over

    • Lyssa

      The most fun one I’ve been to wound up involving a casual dinner (BBQ joint) and then going bowling. So, I would definitely do something fun for a group and laid back.

    • Gail the Goldfish

      Dinner and bowling, at a bowling alley that serves alcohol. Bonus points if it’s one of those bowling alleys that also has an arcade and/or tabletop shuffleboard.

      • Mpls

        Twin Cities specific suggestion – Pinstripes in Edina has bowling and bocce, a fire pit outside and really good food/wine. Its trying to be an upscale bowling alley :)

    • anon

      planning one for a friend of mine who likes to cook, so we are doing a cooking class (with alcohol pairings)!

    • B

      What kind of feel are you looking for? Fancy dinner/drinks? Outdoor activities? Low key or kitschy fun? Girly antiquing? Depending on the answer to this I would do:

      Fancy Dinner/Drinks: I would start with afternoon/early evening drinks on a downtown rooftop. I would recommend Union because they have a retractable roof on their deck so even if the weather is a little iffy (possible in MSP in May), you are covered. I’d then grab cabs/Uber down to the Warehouse district to eat somewhere fun like Bar La Grassa or Borough. If you don’t want to go that far, Marin and Vincent downtown are both good. Then drinks somewhere like Marvel bar in the warehouse district.

      Outdoor activities: May can be a little hit or miss for water-based activities, but if its warm they offer log-rolling classes at Lake Calhoun in Uptown that I’ve heard are super fun. You can also paddleboard on the lakes and on the Mississippi River. After something outdoorsy, Stella’s in Uptown is overpriced but has a nice roofdeck or maybe head to Nicollet (“Eat Street”) for some excellent pizza at Black Sheep or awesome Vietnamese or German food, followed by drinks at Icehouse.

      Kitschy fun: Haven’t been, but they just opened a place called Betty Danger’s that is a bar with mini-golf and a ferris wheel that you can drink on. I’d do that and then tour a few breweries in the Northeast, like Sociable Cider Werks, Dangerous Man, or Bauhaus. Alternatively, try bowling at Bryant-Lake Bowl in Uptown

      Girly: Stillwater is about a 40 minute drive from downtown Minneapolis with lots of antiques, a wine cave to tour, and is just generally a super-cute little town. There are also a ton of farms between Minneapolis and Stillwater where you could stop and u-pick raspberries and strawberries if you’ll be here in late May

    • TO Lawyer

      I think a fun activity would be a good idea. I’ve been to parties at restaurants with belly dancing which is always fun. A friend did pole dancing which was a hoot (and also a really tough workout). I also really like the idea of pizza and champagne but depending on the bride, that might be a little too quiet.

      The best, one-night bachelor3tte parties I’ve been to have involved dinner and then some fun twist on a bar, like a bar with a show or some fun theme.

    • LondonLeisureYear

      Haha I will have to share this with my sister! She is planning mine in May in Minneapolis and was struggling for ideas!

    • SC

      I recently went to a bachelorette party held at the MOH’s family cabin (renting a house would work too). We grilled, built a fire, made s’mores, listened to girly music, drank champagne and wine, etc. Best bachelorette party I’ve been to in a long time!

  4. Batgirl

    Does anyone have any idea what kind of doctor to see for seemingly chronic back pain? My GP wasn’t much help and physical therapy did very little. There are so many quacks in this field that it’s hard to sort the wheat from the chaff. Bonus points for recs in NYC–thanks!!

    • InfoGeek

      Chiropractor, but try to find recommendations for one that has helped someone you know.

      • TNTT

        This. There are so many chiropractors who advertise their services as like, curing the flu and all that ails you. But if you find one who can actually adjust your back and neck and relieve your back/neck pain they are worth their weight in gold. I found mine from a personal recommendation (my dad) and I agree it’s the best way to do it.

      • Clementine

        Yes! Chiropractors come in many different breeds- some are total ambulance chasers, some are more physically therapy oriented and some are very crunchy holistic types. For me, personal recommendations have totally been the way to go.

        My current Chiro (not in NYC) has a background in Kinesiology and does amazing things to help me keep running, hiking, and doing all the things I like to do. I see mine as needed- usually about once a year.

    • Emma

      Or maybe a physical therapist?

      I have a family member who’s a physical therapist, and over Christmas, I was talking about really bad pain that I’d been having for 3 months in my upper back. I had been planning to see my GP, but my family member asked if he could take a look. He had me do a bunch of things, and then he suggested some exercises — it totally got rid of my pain, which was basically caused by hunching over books and keyboards too much of the day. I guess it caused certain muscles not to work enough, and others to work too hard. If your pain is muscle related, a physical therapist might be a good option. You may need a referral?

      • banana

        co-signed. But try a different physical therapist. My father had debilitating back pain and, while the first physical therapist didn’t really help, the second was a God-send.

      • Brunchaholic

        Piggy backing off of this, a good friend of mine is a physical therapist and according to her the #1 cause of chronic back pain is weak abs (your low back makes up for it). I personally have chronic back pain and when I’m good about daily yoga and focus on engaging my core, it’s amazing how quickly it goes away! (I’ve also seen a chiropractor and taken muscle relaxants and nothing works quite like this.)

        There’s a lot of literature about how these simple things are often times more effective than even drastic changes, so I’d give it a go. Good luck!

      • JJ

        Sometimes your insurance will require that you see a doctor who refers you to physical therapy, so I would check on that first. I’ve had multiple back problems, and usually see an orthopedic doctor that specializes in backs first, to rule out any issues that therapy won’t fix. I’ve had surgery on a herniated disc, for example. However, for all other back pain, physical therapy (and strengthening my core and making myself stretch) has been a God-send.

      • Bonnie

        Yes, my physical therapist did wonders for my back. Your insurance may also pay for massage therapy. It’s not a full spa massage but rather they focus on the troubled spot.

      • Anonyc

        I have no advice, only solidarity (also suffer from period back pain, thanks law school books, hours at the computer, and heavy children!). But DH, who was a college athlete and now as a middle aged dude has the predictable physical ailments that accompany his past exploits, has long attended PT at Fusion PT (http://fusion-pt.com/) in the meatpacking district. He swears by them and really loves Carolyn, the founder. And once he saw Jon Stewart getting PT there, too, so there’s that ;-)

    • houda

      I went to a chiropractor who was also a sports doctor and osteopathic (no idea what the English name for it is).
      I always gravitate towards multidisciplinary doctors when I can’t pinpoint the issue.
      He was of great help and found some interesting correlations between different issues.

    • Acupuncture

      My husband had great luck with acupuncture for back pain and I’ve used it for other ailments. Bianca at Sacred Space Acupuncture on 32nd Street is awesome, but scheduling can be tricky. If the timing works I’d highly recommend her. She has a background in PT too

      • cbackson

        As an alternative to this, a PT who does trigger-point dry needling. The techniques are similar to acupuncture, but it’s not rooted in Chinese medicine, but rather in research-based approach.

    • L in DC

      I used the approach outlined in the book “Healing Back Pain” by Dr. John Sarno and it completely resolved my chronic back and muscle pain (after about 6 years of chiropractic, acupuncture, Rolfing, yoga, pilates, massage, trigger point therapy, physical therapy, various other alternative approaches, and visits to standard medical doctors). It’s the #1 book on Amazon in the “back pain” category and has over 1000 reviews. A friend gave it to me after having crazy results (she was being told she had two slipped discs and needed immediate surgery) and I’ve passed it along to several people who have had results varying from substantial to total resolution of pain. I’m not a fan of Howard Stern, but he was a patient of Dr. Sarno and was able to get total resolution of debilitating back pain (there are videos of Stern interviewing him on YouTube).

      The book costs about $7 and takes about 2 hours to read and another 15-30 minutes to do the recommended exercises. Given the incredibly small investment involved, I’d recommend giving a try even if you’re totally skeptical of the premise. Based on my experience and friends I know who’ve also used the book, you should see at least some results right away. My results were pretty dramatic — I literally woke up the next morning without pain for the first time in years, and the pain cycled in and out for a few more weeks before resolving entirely. Good luck!

    • Batgirl

      Wow, thanks SO much for all of the really helpful replies. I am definitely going to check out the book “Healing Back Pain”, may call a chiropractor, and may give PT another try. And yes, start being more religious about the ab exercises they gave me to do. Thanks, all!

  5. Party Planner

    My original post got eaten, so sorry if this ends up being a duplicate. Just wondering if anyone has been to any unique bachelorette parties lately. Looking to plan something that doesn’t involve an evening of bar hopping. It will be in Minneapolis in May if anyone local has specific suggestions!

    • Anonymous

      Your original post probably went into moderation because you get moderated for using any word with e t t e.

  6. Wildkitten

    Is there a store where one can buy plus sized suiting or is the best bet to order a bunch of options online and take them to a tailor?

    • Meg Murry

      Interview suits or everyday work suits? Some Macy’s carry plus sized suiting, but its hit or miss as to what they actually have in stock – when I was hunting a couple of months ago they mostly only had the Calvin Klein everyday value line – which current has a shorter jacket that is not flattering to plus-sized me. I was searching for interview suits though – there were more options for separates from other brands as well, but still not nearly as many as for straight sizes.

      Jones New York also used to carry suiting in stores, but I don’t know if they have many (or any) brick and mortar stores anymore.

      If your credit card can handle over $1000 in charges at once, I’d order a ton online from Macys and/or Jones New York myself. Or you can go to one of the B&M stores to try things on knowing that chances are you will still wind up ordering the size and color combo you want online – for instance, you might be able to try on a black jacket and charcoal pants but decide you want to order the charcoal suit online, and the pants in one size up.

    • AIMS

      Are you in NYC? The Lord and Taylor flagship on 5th avenue has a pretty large plus size department that has lots of suits from what I remember.

      • Sydney Bristow

        That’s the only place I’ve really had regular luck finding plus size suits in person.

        Macy’s is another option but in my experience it totally depends on the store.

    • Moonstone

      Comprehension fail: I read this as bathing suits and spent a few minutes thinking about how to tailor a one-piece.

      • Idea

        You’re OK. Whenever I see “pumps” I think “breast pumps” instead of shoes. Yes, I’m a regular at the Moms site, I just wanted to commiserate.

    • Wildkitten

      Interview suit – in DC. I will try Macys and Lord and Taylor but plan to buy online. TY!

    • anne

      Some Talbots have plus-size in store. They have lots of options on-line, look at their seasonless wool.

    • Wildkitten

      Update – Ann Taylor carries 14 in the store, which while not technically plus-sized, is good enough for an emergency! I will try the other shops and online over the weekend. Thank you all!

  7. anon

    Does anyone know how Eric Bompard sweaters sizing runs? I’ve heard these are great quality and the price isn’t too bad w/ current good Euro exchange rate.

    • Anonymous

      Is this a weird ad campaign or something? Starting to see lots of random anon posts about this brand.

      • la vie en bleu

        I’m guessing it’s the same person who posted last time, but no one answered so she tried again.

    • houda

      They have a comfortable fit for their classic line, and they have a fitted line that runs small.

  8. Periodic bad pap smears

    Mine are generally normal, but they go through periods of having to go back for repaps, and every 7 years or so, I get an abnormal one with a bad HPV strain. Is it the sort of thing that waxes and wanes? Does my immune system get rid of it (to the point of having a normal pap) but not so completely that it comes back in a few years?
    Not sure what to make of the see-saw I seem to be on (and it’s colposcopy time again — last one was 6 years ago, then 7 years before that).

    I’m mid-40s and done having children and am sure my DH and I are not cheating (we got together late — am sure one or both of us brought it with us –> our 20s are never really past, it seams).

    Anyone else had this now-you-d0-now-you-don’t on this front?

    • Wildkitten

      I haven’t had this particular experience myself, but it is exactly why they now recommend you get one every 3 years instead of every year. Way too many people were getting positives that just went away. So you are not alone and this is very normal.

      • Anon

        +1. I am mid-30s and still get annual paps, and I test + for high-risk HPV about half the time. It’s annoying, but some people just don’t shake it as well as others do. Taking folic acid helps, as do all of the general “live a healthy lifestyle” things (eat mostly well, regular exercise, etc). Like you, I’m not at all concerned about infidelity in my long-term relationship – this is just something my body has trouble getting rid of.

    • Gail the Goldfish

      No personal experience, but HPV’s an issue in some of the cases I work on (more in head & neck cancers than cervical, but similar principle)–apparently the current thinking is that it can go dormant and then come back, so yes, I would imagine that’s what happens.

      • la vie en bleu

        Yes on the ‘dormant’ thing, my drs keep telling me they just honestly don’t know, but this might be what is happening. It’s frustrating to me, because I feel like if this was something men got, there would probably have been trillions of dollars thrown at research till they figured it out.

        But this is why I focus on going back to the same doctor every time and not getting shuffled around a practice, because my dr knows exactly where my last bad cells were and what to look for to see if it is serious enough for a colpo or if it is low grade enough we can just keep an eye on it till the next one.

        • Gail the Goldfish

          If it makes you feel better, the HPV-related oral cancers occur more frequently in men than women. This of course means there probably will be more research money spent on the topic. :-/

    • anon

      very timely for me– just had a normal pap but + for one of the bad strains, so I’m due for my second colposcopy (abnormal pap led to my first one about 8 years ago). I recall the first one being AWFUL, so I am not excited about this.

      I also was curious whether this could be the same “infection” just going dormant and flaring up. dr. google was inconclusive, but I guess it doesn’t change anything either way. oh well, you are not alone!

      • Anonymous

        I have HPV and, since I know this, my gyn and I have agreed that I do not have to have a colposcopy just because my pap comes up HPV positive. There’s just no point. I’ve had abnormal paps and have been treated for pre-cancer but not in a long time.

    • CountC

      Yep. This has happened to me over the last 11 years or so. I’ve had false bad paps, bad paps, normal paps, it just rotates when it feels like it. I have gotten used to it and just go with the flow. I have to have a colposcopy around every 7 years or so. Long story short, yes this happens to me too.

  9. Pipe dream

    So, I have a probably-not-gonna-happen fantasy of becoming a dance instructor. I’m in my early 30s and am not even one of the better students in any of my classes! I am in pretty good shape, though I definitely have work to do on my strength and flexibility. Can anyone speak to this situation? I know it’s a long shot, to say the least.

      • Pipe dream

        Hip-hop, tap, or just dance-themed exercise classes like boot camps. I wouldn’t expect to make much money at it, just enough that I wasn’t losing money or feeling exploited or whatever. It’s like 95% about the fun of it. I know I would not be a competitive candidate for true “jobs” in this field!

        Thanks everyone else so far for your input!

    • Idea

      Maybe Zumba or aerobic fitness certification is for you? I have at least 2 friends who were in the Show Choir in high school who now do this. And it’s not dance, but it is, and it’s a perfect fit for them.
      Not sure of the certification process, but if you look at it as a fun thing to do, and not your alternate/dream career, it’d be fun to start down that road and see where you end up!

      • Miss Behaved

        I have a friend who is a big time HR consultant, but she’s also a zumba instructor. She’s fully certified and everything…

    • Wildkitten

      Would you be happy being a dance-themed group fitness instructor, like Zumba?

      • Anon

        This seems like it would be a more attainable path–maybe something like Jazzercise or Barre classes? My 14 year old daughter is on a competitive dance team and all the instructors at her studio and neighboring studios were competitive dancers, usually up to the college level with many majoring in dance. I don’t think it is easy to get a job otherwise. But the fitness-class instructors are for the majority not trained dancers, but liked dancing and got certified in the various classes.

        • Anon

          Agreed, when I was a competitive dancer all my coaches were ex-professional dancers.

        • Meg Murry

          As opposed to competitive dance at a dance studio, I think it could be possible somewhere like a community center or YMCA. One of my friends actually has a part-time gig doing ballroom and swing dancing lessons and demos at nursing homes and senior centers that they have a ton of fun at. I also agree that teaching Jazzercise, Zumba or barre classes might be a good route to go. Most of the people I know that do that typically only just barely break even most years, but they are still ahead of the rest of us that are paying for gym memberships and classes.

    • CountC

      I see no reason why you couldn’t get qualified/certified to teach a Zumba class or something similar. Honestly, from what I have seen, as long as you are enthusiastic and can follow a beat, you’re good to teach a Zumba class.

      I have a pipe dream of singing in a country cover band on weekends. I can sign fine and was in choir growing up, but no one wants some by day corporate working singing once a month in their cover band!! One of these days . . .

  10. Sansa

    I could use the hive’s advice on an issue I’m having at work. I’m a midlevel associate in a small practice group. When a senior associate in my group went on maternity leave, I took over an ongoing project from her that basically involves coordinating many different people’s work and editing it to publish blog posts for our clients. By all accounts from the other associates in our group, I handled this much more effectively than she did – it had been a haphazard process before, and I organized it and implemented strict deadlines to make sure we had a timely, quality work product. Nevertheless, when senior associate returned from maternity leave, I offered to hand her the project back (frankly, I would have been happy to – it’s kind of a pain). She declined but said she’d be happy to “offer input.” But now I’m in a position where she is attempting to micromanage it from afar – constantly sending me things to include in the posts (even though I already have a system to ensure relevant things are in there), and more problematically, asking to edit the posts but then not getting to it for days, thus delaying our schedule. It’s driving me nuts, but she is much more senior to me and is highly respected by the partners in our group. I’m not really sure whether I should suck it up and deal with the annoyances or if I should say something to her or the partners we work for. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

    • nutella

      How about the next time she asks to edit, say something like, “Oh, that would be wonderful, thank you! I’ve set an internal deadline to keep us on track for May 8 so we aren’t scrambling last-minute. Of course, if you are swamped, don’t worry – I’ve got it covered no problem!”

      I would not say anything to the partners. I would also not say directly to her “hey, I don’t like your micromanaging” but try to spin it like I did above.

      • Senior Attorney

        This. Stick to your schedule and if she doesn’t get her comments back in time, too bad, so sad.

      • Walnut

        I’m in a situation where I have several internal clients who like to “review” work I have prepared to feel like they are “in the loop”. Very rarely do any of these clients actually provide feedback, so my emails are drafted along the lines of “The requested workpaper is attached for your review. Provide any feedback by April 12, otherwise, workpaper will be submitted in it’s current form on April 15.

        Basically, don’t leave yourself in a situation where you imply you won’t do anything until you hear back from them. Let them know what your plan is when they inevitably don’t get back to you.

    • Bonnie

      You could also say that the deadline has passed for new content but it can go in the next issue.

  11. Hostess Gift

    Husband and I are going to visit some of his relatives for a weekend and I’d like to bring some kind of host gift. We’re coming from NY and they don’t drink, so my first thought is some kind of baked goods that will last a few days to a week like Chocolate Babka, rugallach and some black & white cookies, etc. Does that sound good? Too many sweets? Am I missing anything? Is there a better idea?

    • Meg Murry

      That sounds good to me. If you wanted to do something besides just baked goods, what about fancy teas or coffees if they drink those?

  12. I finally drank the koolaid...

    …and ordered an OG.

    I guess 5+ years of reading this site finally got to me…

    • Anon

      One of us! One of us!

      Seriously, though, you will love it. Best carryon bag ever.

    • AIMS

      Don’t feel bad, I really want to order the Pearl but don’t want another black bag so am obsessively checking their site every other week or so to see if they’ve come out with a better color…

    • anonymom

      I have the OG on my wish list to replace my Eagle Creek laptop bag (an older style that actually looks pretty cute) when it finally wears out. But lately I have been thinking that I should just take the plunge and buy the OG for travel, since my Eagle Creek doesn’t hold anything other than laptop + chargers + padfolio + purse contents + umbrella. Does the OG really hold clothing, shoes, toiletries, etc. in addition to these items?

      • profesora

        I also drank the koolaid awhile back. I regularly take OG (and only OG) on trips of 1-2 nights. For me, the key is using packing cubes for clothes (eagle creek), usually one large one sometimes with a smaller one inside. Then it fits the clothes cube, toiletry kit (which I put the ziploc inside after security), laptop, chargers, large clutch and other purse contents, umbrella, water bottle, and 1 pair of shoes in the shoe pocket. It always fits under the seat. I’m very happy with it.

  13. anon

    I have no idea what to get my sister and her fiance for their upcoming wedding. Cash seems too generic, but I already bought them a nice registry gift for their shower. Any ideas?

    Also, what’s a good amount to spend? She’s my only sister and I love her dearly, so I feel like the sky’s the limit. I usually spend around $100 for friend weddings… so $250? $500? I have no idea.

    • Anonymous

      Are they moving into a new home? Maybe a GC to a furniture / housewares store that she likes.

    • Diana Barry

      We got my BIL and SIL a retirement contribution when they got married. But know your audience! :)

    • Anon

      My sister and her fiancé both had kids when they got married so we arranged to keep the boys and send the parents on a night out. We rented a limo, booked a hotel room, made arrangements to pay for dinner, etc. They really enjoyed it. I’m not suggesting this is what you should do, but maybe try to think of something that your sister would really love and then make that happen for her. Does she like wine tasting? Can you arrange for her and her husband to go? Is she adventurous? Can you arrange for them to go kayaking or skydiving? Is she sentimental? Can you have her wedding invitation engraved (I think Tiffany’s will do this)?

    • Emily

      I got my sister a Vitamix bundle (the one that comes with two containers) because I know they love healthy eating and it was on their wishlist.

    • Clementine

      For my sister, we got a personalized Etsy gift (framed funky art of their new shared last name)- very know your audience and they liked that. It wasn’t that expensive but very sentimental.

      Their ‘big’ gift was taking care of their dog and arranging for pet-sitting/watching him for their wedding and honeymoon so they didn’t have to think about or pay for anything. For us it was a different way of giving a cash gift.

    • Zelda

      I got some friends a personalized ceramic platter that looked like their initials carved in wood (link to follow) that they loved. I think personalized/sentimental gifts plus something larger are great for really close friends/family.

    • cbackson

      When my dear BFF got married, she was moving to a new city with her husband. I knew that city well, so I got them gift cards to all of my favorite places/experiences in that city and made a little map of my favorite spots for them. It ended up being about $500, I think.

    • KinCA

      Maybe a gift certificate to a fancy restaurant so they can go on a nice date night after the wedding?

      Alternatively, is there some detail about the wedding they really care about that you could keep or preserve for them? My sister was fanatically in love with their wedding invitations , so I had their invitation suite professionally framed in a nice frame for part of their gift and she LOVED it.

      • Walnut

        Along these lines, I had my friend’s wedding bouquet preserved for her. It was something she wanted, but cut it out of her budget to save some cash. Also, getting the flowers to/from the preservation place was a hassle, as she didn’t live close to one, so it was a bit of a gift of time as well.

    • Sydney Bristow

      Did you and your sister love to do something together when you were kids that could suggest a present? For example, if you loved baking chocolate chip cookies together then you could get her a Kitchen Aid mixer and do up a cookie mix to include in it.

  14. Wine

    Wine goes with everything. Can you get them a case that they can cellar for a while and then open bottles over time? This works really well with port.

    • la vie en bleu

      Oh, building on this, I saw a post somewhere on the internets about giving someone a case of wine with each one labeled for a specific occasion in the future. “For the first promotion” “For the first dinner party” “For our 2nd anniversary’ etc. That might be good because you can personalize it and make it really sentimental.

  15. Seattle Freeze

    Has anybody ever found a successful treatment or therapy for TMJ pain? Dentists and a TMJ specialist have given me night guards in the past, but I just end up grinding my teeth on the guard and clenching even more. It’s going on 30 years with this pain and I’d love to find some way to reduce it. My current dentist keeps recommending braces but with no orthodontia coverage in my dental insurance that’s not going to happen.

    So, acupuncture? Massage? Some magic way to program my jaw not to clench?

    • roses

      I hate to say this, Seattle, but I (or more accurately, my parents) did everything to try to reduce my TMJ-induced migranes when I was a teen – chiropractor, acupuncture, night guard, etc. It didn’t help because the clenching was just a symptom of the way my teeth were arranged, which put pressure on nerves around my jaw joint. I’m sorry that I don’t remember the exact mechanics of what they did to fix it – I was 15 and just know that I got 4 teeth removed and then had braces to re-arrange them to take the pressure off my jaw. But that really in the end was the only thing that helped. I’d explore ways to see if you can get your regular medical insurance to cover this instead of relying on dental.

    • Mpls

      Not TMJ, but had a persistent clogged feeling in my inner ear that didn’t show as a blockage when I visited the ENT. Started going to massage therapy and it has really helped – working the upper back and the scalenes (muscles down the side of your neck). It might help relax the neck muscles and retrain them so clenching doesn’t seem as habitable – but it will be a multi-month process. Probably something to do in conjunction with a nightguard. They might have suggestions for stretches to do in between appointments to keep the muscles from falling back into old habits.

      Can you get a doctor to get you a prescription for massage, so you can pay with HSA or FSA money?

    • BB

      Ugh. Commiseration! I’ve had TMJ since I was a teenager and have tried every medical thing EXCEPT braces. Honestly, I never tried braces because I seem to get conflicting advice on whether they will actually solve the problem, and I don’t want to go through the pain/shame/cost of getting them if there’s only a 50/50 chance they’ll work.

      I did try massage a while ago and I think it did help. The issue is that I really should be going once every 2 weeks or so, but have so much going on in my life right now that I haven’t gotten around to making it a part of my schedule. It gave me some relief for a few days and I found myself clenching less.

      ETA: With the massage, I found that it wasn’t necessary to actually get massaged around my jaw. The clenching was more because I had a lot of shoulder/neck tension.

    • Saguaro

      I know you said you tried the night guard, but what kind did you have? I got one from my dentist that is just for the 2 front teeth, not the whole mouth. Apparently the teeth in front are not as strong for clenching, so the mouth relaxes sooner (or something like that!). It has worked for me.

      • Seattle Freeze

        Thanks, Saguaro – I think I’ve seen that type of guard advertised but haven’t tried it; I’ll have to investigate that further. Traditional nightguards that fit over all the top teeth just cause me to grind/clench more.

        In response to some of the other suggestions, I had braces for 4 years as a teenager, with multiple extractions beforehand (like roses described above). The whole experience with braces was so very painful – I remember not being able to chew/eat for a week after each adjustment – and they didn’t work anyway as my teeth reverted right back to their previous crooked state.

        Mpls, I’m sure I could get an Rx for massage, though no FSA/HSA at my employer. I’ll have to check to see if massage is excluded from my dental coverage for TMJ; I know my medical insurance will exclude it.

        Thanks, all!

        • Senior Attorney

          I would just add a word of caution about bite guards. I got one from my dentist because I was grinding my teeth, and it ruined my bite so that I had to get braces (again!) in my 40s. Argh! It was a disaster of epic proportions!

    • LondonLeisureYear

      I had TMJ so bad I would break my night guards in my sleep (crack them) and eventually it was decided to stop having them in my mouth because I was worried I would choke on them in my sleep. Then I went off to work as a camp counselor and didn’t have any issues that summer. Once I got home it started up again. I have discovered that I don’t have any problems with TMJ following these guidelines…I am sure you have tried this stuff but thought it might be helpful.
      1) If I sleep more than 7 hours at a time, for some reason the TMJ starts if I sleep too solidly or for too long
      2) If my pillows are too firm/ too soft it can factor into the TMJ
      3) If I am stressed out, or talking a ton in meetings it happens so I have to be very careful to handle my stress
      4) I need to make sure I don’t eat popcorn or other crunchy foods like that 2 days in a row, if I give it a break that works
      5) If I talk on my phone too much, instead of using a head set or speaker phone. holding it against my head I think changes how I move my mouth.

    • rachel

      I went to see a TMJ specialist in northern Virginia. He had a special orthotic made for me based on my pain, different from a mouth guard…more like a retainer but it relieved the pain I had in my jaw. I wear it every night and I could wear it when it hurt (i.e. during the day…but never do bc it makes me look weird) and I haven’t really had serious TMJ problems since. It was really expensive but def worth it :)

  16. Anonymous

    My husband did acupuncture for TMJ. On the first session his pain went from an 8 to a 3 on his pain scale. After 2 more sessions the pain was gone and has not returned in almost 10 years. He gets occasional clicking, but thats it.

  17. KP

    Hopefully not too late to post this to get some responses. I may have an opportunity to get my dream job (well I think it is my dream job), for a lot less money than I currently make (biglaw currently), and I’d have to move across the country to do it (no official offer yet but let’s assume its a done deal for the purposes of this post). What would you ladies do? All my friends/family are here, but my DH (upon initial conversations) is willing to go. I don’t have children (yet) and would probably want to come back to my coast before that would happen so I could be near to my family. Is it crazy to uproot myself from where I want to be down the road? I’ve been looking for local jobs and not having luck with my search. It might open doors for me to come back some day, but is it crazy? Is the money cut and the location too much? What do you all think about the trade off? Would you do it?

    • First Year Anon

      If I was you- it sounds like there are too many negatives for me to make it worthwhile. It will cost you a lot of money to see your friends and family if you move across the coast, AND you’re taking a pay cut. What is the COL difference? Do you like the area you’d be moving to, even though you want to eventually end up where you are now?

    • Anon in NYC

      If I were in your shoes, I’d probably move for my dream job. A few things I’d consider: 1) location – is it someplace I want to be for 2+ years, 2) is the salary enough for me to live reasonably well on – not the same standard of living, but decent apartment in a safe location and not eating ramen every night, 3) am I going to be completely miserable without friends/family around. There is always an adjustment period when you move someplace new, but it can make people seriously unhappy., and 4) does this job open doors for me down the road, particularly when I think about relocating back to the same general area. What skill set would this provide me / is this particularly prestigious / what value does this add to my resume.

      • BB

        +1 on your #4. I’ve never had a problem with uprooting myself, but I can’t tell from OP’s post whether she is just giddy about the offer or actually has a plan around what to do with/after the “dream job.”

    • Anon

      Are you ready to end up in that area permanently? Life has a funny way of intervening. . . i.e. you’re there for a 1-year position and meet the right guy, etc. I know you’re already married, but I’ve seen this happen a number of times.

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