Thursday’s Workwear Report: Oversized Blazer
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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices.
A white blazer is an absolute must for me for putting together summer work outfits. I toss one over a black or navy sheath dress, add some slightly brighter jewelry, and somehow, I’ve pulled my wardrobe from the depths of winter into the summer sunshine.
{related: the best boyfriend blazers for work}
This blazer from And Now This has a slightly oversized fit, so size appropriately depending on the look you’re going for.
The blazer is $69 at Macy's and comes in sizes XS–XL. It also comes in black, camel, gray, and navy.
Calvin Klein has a plus-size option, also at Macy's, for $139 (and also available in black).
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Sales of note for 3/21/25:
- Nordstrom – Spring sale, up to 50% off: Free People, AllSaints, AG, and more
- Ann Taylor – 25% off suiting + 25% off tops & sweaters + extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 40% off everything + extra 20% off
- Eloquii – $39+ dresses & jumpsuits + up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – 25% off select linen & cashmere + up to 50% off select styles + extra 40% off sale
- J.Crew Factory – Friends & Family Sale: Extra 15% off your purchase + extra 50% off clearance + 50-60% off spring faves
- M.M.LaFleur – Flash Sale: Get the Ultimate Jardigan for $198 on sale; use code CORPORETTE15 for 15% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – Buy 1 get 1 50% off everything, includes markdowns
A question for those who are married and wear a wedding ring: What does your wedding ring look like, and do you have any regrets about what you selected? If you had to do it over again, would you select the same type of band?
No regrets over a decade in – opted for a band that looks like an eternity band on the top, but plain (platinum) metal on the back. The plain back has been great. No snagging on anything with all the teeny prongs, and no damage to the prongs when grabbing stuff. I am not particularly gentle on my rings (only take them off for major home improvement projects) and just have a lovely patina to show for the wear.
This is what I have, too. Mine is diamond pave/platinum. I also did not do a lot of research on rings/bands before getting engaged because I wanted something classic, simple, and did not want to push DH into uncomfortable budget territory at the time. I do like it but don’t like when the platinum side comes to the front. I do, however, think a wedding band should be simple and hardy, which mine is.
I did buy myself a 2ct eternity band for my right hand and I love it. So sparkly!
Same here. I didn’t think a full eternity band would be comfortable, and I didn’t want to worry about scraping anything. I also wanted a slim band so I could add an anniversary band later without adding too much bulk. My anniversary band is a bit flashier and has alternating diamonds and sapphires. I wish the sapphires were lighter in color, but otherwise love my set.
I have this too! Love it and get compliments on it.
I have the same ring now (and love it), but didn’t start out with it. Thankfully you can change your wedding band anytime!
My wedding band is a plain yellow gold band. It was the ring my husband proposed with (all he knew was that I preferred yellow gold to white gold/platinum, so he proposed with the plain band and said we could go pick out an engagement ring together, which is exactly what we did). It was my choice to use it as my wedding band. I would never change it.
I wear my wedding band, my engagement ring (yellow gold with white gold prongs), and a half-eternity diamond ring (yellow gold) on top of both (that we picked out together a few years after getting married, because those first few years threw us a LOT of challenges and we emerged stronger and wanted something to symbolize it).
I don’t see myself changing anything. I prefer yellow gold to white, and if I feel a need for bigger/fancier jewelry in the future, there are lots of other options (right hand, necklace, earrings, etc).
No regrets because I have multiple rings in all the styles that I like and I wear whatever I’m in the mood for that day.
Same here. I have an engraved gold band I wear for day-to-day, I have another plain band that I wear when I really could lose my ring and I don’t want to get upset about it (while I’m rafting, hiking, cycling, etc.) and then I have what I think of as my flashy ring, which is a 1.1 carat diamond (inherited from my grandmother) set into a ring with 1 carat worth of diamonds my husband bought, which I wear with my original wedding band, which is a diamond “infinity” band that is flat on the back, as someone else described. It’s flashy, and I don’t want to lose my grandma’s diamond, so I only wear that set on limited occasions.
I also have my other grandmother’s wedding set – engagement ring with a jacket enhancer – and I wear that as a right-hand ring sometimes.
My soul sister! Glad I’m not the only one who does this!
Same here! I *love* jewelry and knew I could never stick to just one wedding ring (and engagement ring, for that matter). The ring I was married with is a 1940’s white and yellow gold patterned band, and I still love it and wear it often. I switch it out for a vintage yellow gold and diamond pave band, a Victorian era gemstone acrostic band, or a silver filigree band depending on what I’m in the mood for what other jewelry I’m wearing.
White gold engagement ring and band. I’ve thought about getting a really simple white-gold band but also if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Eleven years in.
Art Deco style sapphire ring with diamond accents in white gold and a coordinating white gold and diamond band. I don’t regret having a very unique ring and not a traditional diamond which isn’t my style.
The white gold does have to be replated every few years but that’s not too expensive and platinum wasn’t an option in this ring. I don’t look good in yellow gold.
I do have plans to get a second ring that is plainer that I can wear instead. Probably a simple gold band similar to what men usually wear.
Mine was custom made to fit around my engagement ring, which has an octagonal setting for the diamond (it’s art deco-inspired), so it has to be worn with my engagement ring. It’s white gold with an engraved design that matches the ring. I love the combo. I’ve liked art deco style jewelry most of my life, so I don’t think i’ll get tired of it. I do have a fake plain band I wear when we are traveling somewhere I don’t want to take my engagement ring.
Same, my engagement ring and wedding band are both art-deco inspired and the wedding band has a rather unusual pleated knife edge design (hard to explain, but from above it looks a bit like a fish tail design with diamonds set horizontally at intervals). My eternty band is a channel set diamond and sapphire ring with the stones also set horizontally to match my wedding band. Simple design but the horizontal setting and combo of square stones (diamonds) and rectangular stones (sapphires) makes it a bit more unique.
I have a plain white gold band but my fingers swell in hot weather so it’s a $20 Qalo as my daily driver.
Plain 10K gold band to match spouse’s great grandmother’s engagement ring. I love it.
Twenty years with a simple, plain, slim white gold band and simple, plain, slim white gold engagement ring with a tiny, brilliant-cut diamond that stands proud of the ring. I never take my rings off and they are holding up fine. The diamond does annoy me, though, and I am very aware even after this much time of how I have to modify my hand motions to avoid gouging myself with the setting or getting it caught in my hair, etc.
If I were going back in time I would nix the diamond and opt for something less ethically troubling and would also embed it in the ring itself so it doesn’t stick out and scratch me or snag sweaters the way this style does. I am not opposed to the symbolism of a wedding band but dislike jewelry generally, and might decline the engagement ring altogether if I were time traveling.
I have a small, beautiful diamond that is sort of embedded in the ring – the ring arches up on the sides to be nearly flush with the diamond. It never snags and I love it.
Yes! That sounds like it would be ideal. Not quite channel set, but smooth and sleek.
19 years in, and I still love it and would choose it again. Mine is a white gold band with channel-set diamond. My engagement ring has a princess-cut stone and channel-set stones on either side. I do have mine soldered together so it’s one solid piece.
My wedding ring is a band that matches my engagement ring – both are white gold with channel set diamonds. I love it and I’d definitely choose it again.
Not exactly what you asked because it’s my engagement ring, but it’s a beautiful braided pattern that looks like infinities. I love the look but probably wouldn’t do it again because lotion gets stuck in the gaps in the braids, so I’m constantly cleaning it.
Oh, and the small ish main diamond (0.75 carat?) was originally set in 4 prongs. They got loose in no time. I replaced it with a 6 prong setting, which is more resilient. It also makes the diamond look rounder, which I like.
My wedding band is my great grandmothers ring. It’s white gold with small line of white diamonds. One of my mothers cousins had it reset when they got married, that marriage didn’t work out, so it got passed to me. I love it! I have a white gold solitaire round diamond ring (not a jewelry person and it’s been forever since I look at rings, so not sure if I’m describing that technically right) that matches it perfectly. We got lucky – DH picked out my engagement ring (with, ahem, very specific instructions from me on style) without ever seeing the wedding band since it was in a different state at my great aunts, and when it arrived it matches perfectly. The bands are even the same size, the golds, match, it’s like they were designed together. Even if it wasn’t my great grandmothers ring, I likely would have ended up with something very similar. I’ve worn it every day for almost 13 years, no regrets at all.
Plain platinum band. I think it’s a “comfort” style. 11 yrs. I feel comfortable wearing it anywhere at all because it’s not ostentatious at all. Our initials are engraved on the inside. I love it because of all it represents.
Traditionally, Jewish custom is that the wedding band is simple with no stones or piercings. A simple unbroken circle that represents a marriage with no conflict or distraction. I did break the rule about no inscription. As well as the rule about not marrying a non-jew. And we have had plenty of conflicts in our marriage but it’s still strong.
My engagement ring is white gold, rectangle diamond in a cathedral setting so I went with a very thin white gold band. I love the idea but I think I went too thin (1mm bought off Etsy). I feel like 2 mm and a little less rounded would have been closer to what I was going for.
27 years married. My wedding ring is a very thin yellow gold band that I wear nearly all the time, very rarely take it off. I did have to have it sized up 1/2 a size after kids were born, otherwise I couldn’t get it over the knuckle at all.
I do mix up what I wear it with – my original engagement ring, an anniversary band, a fancy anniversary ring, other bands DH has given me for other occasions, etc. These I swap out all the time depending on mood, fanciness of outfit, etc. Some of these are in white gold, platinum, and yellow gold. I mix metals all the time.
I love my ring, but sometimes wish I had spent more time thinking about what I wanted. I was 26 when we got engaged, and my sense of style wasn’t as good then either. White gold eternity band with a colored sapphire. I specifically didn’t want a diamond, which I still agree with, but I now think eternity bands look pretty outdated and wish I had gone with a more classic thin yellow gold band.
Slim engraved gold band with engraving on the sides as well as the top. I think it’s worked well for me because I have tiny hands, and while gold is soft, slight nicks don’t really show because it’s already got a lot going on with the scrollwork and patterning. Now the fanciness is not quite my style, but it is my husband’s style, and he has a ring that doesn’t match but which complements mine.
+1 I have a similar wedding band. It’s antique wedding band with subtle orange blossom patterned engraving. It was common in the 20’s. I also like that it doesn’t show nicks.
Platinum and diamond eternity band. My Art Deco inspired engagement ring only has diamonds on the top side of the shank, and that’s all I was looking for, but the eternity band was all the jeweler had that matched my ring when I ran in to quickly buy a band as I was leaving town for our wedding. Absolutely no regrets about either ring.
I have a platinum eternity band, diamonds all the way around, with millgrain along the top and bottom giving it an heirloom look. The diamonds are all flat to the ring and don’t bother me at all. What does bother me a tiny bit is the water that gets caught behind the diamonds when washing my hands. Once every 3 years or so I get some contact act dermatitis on my ring finger that takes a couple weeks to clear. I attribute it to the damp behind the diamonds. Not sure I’d change it, but it happens.
We married with just bands–the most traditional looking ones you can imagine- yellow gold with milgrain edges. We felt very strongly about having matching bands that were somewhat gender neutral. Also because my spouse is Jewish and I think Jews believe in plain bands?
Sweet story: we purchased from a local jeweler who was wearing a ring very similar to what we ended up purchasing. But, after 40+ years of marriage, the milgrain had begun to wear off and become smoother. I’m not a big romantic, but that really touched me. May we all wear out our rings before our love!
After we’d been married for a year or so, my MIL handed down a matching set that belonged to her mother. The diamonds are modest and set in silver. Sometimes I wear just the engagement ring with my own gold band and at other times, I stack all three.
I grew to like having a mismatched set. Now I love seeing mixed metal on others, as it evokes that same mixing of old and new love. I already look forward to handing down the family set but keeping my band for myself for life. :)
Once I stopped wearing my e-ring daily, I regret ted my original wedding band (plain, narrow platinum band). For our 10 year anniversary, my husband got me an eternity band, which I wear as my wedding ring daily going on 5 years now. I still wear my plain ring for things like going to the pool/beach or other active activities. I unapologetically love sparkle, and should have realized that about myself back when I was getting married!
I have a plain white-gold band, no diamonds, but an engraving with wedding date and our names on the inside. Spouse and I got married right after college, so we were looking for a symbol more than an expensive ring, and I didn’t want to lose stones. I personally think it’s insane to spent thousands on a ring, but YMMV.
The white-gold of the wedding ring has scratched but I’m not looking to refresh the ring as the scratches reflect our 15 yr journey together.
I had a silver engagement ring, also simple band.
Eternity band all the way around. I got 1/4 size larger than my engagement ring, which has worked out well. I have a very low setting (bottom of diamonds almost touch my finger), so it does not rub at all between my fingers or catch on anything. Very happy with my decision 6 years in.
I have a half eternity band in white gold with bezel set sapphires. I don’t have an engagement ring. I love it.
Married 5 1/2 years. Hubby and I have matching very wide yellow gold bands with a Celtic knot design. I love it although, like Curious, I am sometimes annoyed because hand lotion gets caught in the design. We picked the bands and loved them, and then we picked a fairly large and elaborate setting for my engagement ring, and that was a puzzle for a hot minute before we realized I have two hands. So since we got married, I wear my engagement ring on my right hand. I usually only wear it when I am out and about — at home I just wear my wedding band 24/7.
We can be Kindle, Fitbit, and hand lotion ring twins, lol. I am down.
That’s a deal!
I have been married for 23 years.
I got engaged with a platinum and diamond estate ring, which I still love. It was always just the one ring, not a separate wedding ring and engagement ring. My husband had a ring made for himself in this Asian style that layers different colors of metals, I can’t remember what it’s called.
After we’d been married for 10 years I had a ring guard made, so basically two thin diamond set bands connected together at the bottom, worn around the original ring so there’s one band on each side. It made my ring wider, obviously, and extra blingy.
Then I had a right hand ring made, not meant to be a wedding ring, and over time I started wearing it on my left hand more often than my right hand. When we’d been married for 20 years, my husband gifted me a beautiful stacking ring meant to go with that one, and now I most often wear the stacking ring on my left hand and the right hand ring back on my right. Since they were meant to go together, it looks nice (to me) to have coordinating but not matching rings on each hand. Both of these were made for me by our local bench jeweler.
So I have four wedding rings. I still wear them all. I’m still married to the same man and switching up my rings says nothing about the marriage. I just like jewelry.
My original wedding ring will likely go to my daughter to become her wedding/engagement ring – hopefully not too soon, but she’s graduating from college and has a serious boyfriend so we’ll see. She has wanted that ring since she was old enough to say the word ring.
Oops I mentioned my husbands original ring and then didn’t follow up. He lost that ring at some point so then he ordered a plain band to replace it. The original ring was found by some contractors working in the crawl space of our house years later, so now he has both and wears both, alternating, just like I wear all of my rings. So neither of us are hung up on “I must wear the exact ring I wore on our wedding day.”
I don’t have an engagement ring, just a less traditional wedding band. It’s a wide, cigar-band style ring, made of titanium with a tiny diamond set in the band (no prongs). I still love it, nearly 17 years later. I wanted something to symbolize the commitment, but didn’t like traditional wedding sets. It’s like our marriage – patinaed, easy to live with, doesn’t snag on things.
Plain gold band, relatively thick, rounded edges. I love it! I have quite large hands and ling fingers and the scale is just right.
Great question. My engagement rings is a thin platinum eternity band. I had no idea what I liked then (20 years ago), and my husband chose it without much guidance from me. I do like it, and it held up well, but my fingers are very long and I feel a little self-conscious that the ring’s size emphasizes my long fingers. My wedding ring I picked out myself to go with my engagement ring, and it’s been a bust!. It is an estate ring, white gold, with channel set diamonds, like a variation of an eternity band. It is very pretty and looks nice with the engagement ring, but it started dropping diamonds on my honeymoon and I stopped wearing it about 6 months later (this after replacing two diamonds!). I only wear my engagement ring, and even that I don’t wear every day. My two closest friends also have these gorgeous larger rings that I love. (I mean that I love them now! I had absolutely no opinion on them when I was first thinking about rings.) On reflection, I do regret my rings and would instead get a combination engagement/ wedding ring with more thickness and more sparkle. I still might but myself something like that. With impending college costs and all the regular expenses of everyday life, though, it feels overly indulgent, so I keep talking myself out of it.
Now that’s we’re back in the office I can’t decide what to do with my hair. Before covid I had a long bob which I liked. Now though, I’ve let it grow out (mid-length, not quite bra strap length) and can’t decide if I want to cut it, or get better at styling my longer hair. I have a round brush blow dryer but can’t seem to get the body/ slight curl at the ends you get from a salon blow out. I only use a heat protectant so maybe I need to use more products? Should I watch videos and keep practicing? Or, should I just get out my curling iron and rough curl it?
Thanks!
For body you probably want to add some product (mousse/etc.) and make sure you’re using a fairly large barrel and lifting up when you dry to add height to the roots. If you’re coordinated/ambitious you can also practice rolling the sections onto rollers or rolling the hair onto itself and clipping it with large alligator clips like they do in a salon. For a curl at the end, my super low skill ‘hack’ is to blow dry my hair straight, part it as I like, and then gather it into a ponytail, twist tightly, wrap it into a bun, and secure with a clip or bobble while I do my makeup/get dressed. My hair is naturally wavy/curly and by tying it back like this I essentially do a quick and easy version of ‘no heat curls’. You don’t want to add a ton of hairspray or it won’t work though. I’ll pull out a curling iron if I have the time/patience for it but this is what I do if I’m traveling or just pressed for time. It also works super well in humidity – I kept my hair pulled back like this through the AM/afternoon sessions at a work event in Orlando and when I put it down for the dinner/cocktail reception I had big bouncy waves.
You could try hot rollers (on the larger size) or Velcro rollers after you dry your hair.
Have you tried a revlon blow dry brush or something like that to help with getting a bend on the ends?
Oh lordy after hearing so much about the confidence study (More men than women believe they can land a plane with zero experience) I had to laugh out loud at today’s news that a man actually did just that. Is it Friday yet? :)
If you had asked me back in the day when I did computer games, I totally would have said I could have a go at landing a plane, and would have been slightly offended if anybody rolled their eyes. Would it have been an accurate description of my skills? Certainly not. I’ll take it as a win, having had a moment of mediocre man confidence.
I totally think I would have decent odds of doing it, especially with help from Air Traffic Control. I guess I have man-confidence?
Ditto… but I have actually landed a plane before. It was a Cessna and the actual pilot guided me through it.
Ha, right, I mean, if the alternative is a fiery crash and death, I’d definitely give it a good try!
Same. I want to believe that I could do it with help from air traffic control, simply because I like being alive.
Ditto. I follow directions very well. I think I can learn anything.
I actually think I could probably land a plane with help from Air Traffic Control. It’s crazier to me that a large percentage of men think they could beat Serena Williams at tennis. Like, no. Just no.
Completely agree. I could land the plane. I could not beat Serena.
I hadn’t heard about the confidence study. But if that’s the question posed then I think it should be called the mansplaining study. Another example of men thinking they know everything about everything and expertise is a myth except when they’re the expert of course. That’s not confidence it’s hubris.
That man had great ATC people in there for a needed assist. I could probably do it with those people but having it end badly would not surprise me, either.
Right. I’d give myself a 70% chance to land a plane in an emergency with ATC instructions. If given the choice, I prefer my chances of dying in a fiery plane crash at any given moment to be lower than 30%.
Landing a plane with zero experience (with coaching from a qualified flight instructor) happens from time to time, often enough that I think many if not most people could do it. It sounds like the man who did it was not all that confident in the moment.
It sounds like he got really lucky, and did well to stay calm. I understand the ATC controller was a flight instructor and knew about this particular airplanes controls
Acknowledging everything we might say about stereotypes and gender socialization, I did wonder if the men surveyed just knew more about flying planes than the women surveyed (I know my husband seems to have never really grown out of the “planes, trucks, and boats” phase a lot of boys go through, and still knows a ridiculous amount about all this, which has led to many conversations with other men who seem to have the same affinity).
I don’t think anyone who has never been to flight school actually knows anything about flying a plane.
All the people I happen to know who did actually go through flight school, without it being part of their profession, are women.
I mean, I know you’re trying to do a Not All Men thing here, but men thinking they’d know how to land a plane because they once played with airplane toys as a kid and like to chat about them with their guy friends is a prime example of the hubris.
I was thinking more that if someone interprets the question to mean “completely manually,” their answer may be different from someone who is assuming they have access to autopilot and ground control. If someone is thinking “autoland technology has come a long way!” their answer may look really different from someone who is just picturing a cockpit with 300 visible buttons/levers none of which they recognize?
I’m looking for books (bonus: audio book for the commute) that can help me in my job. Either something more 30,000 foot view for keeping life organized (thinking: habits of highly successful people, for example) or something about business development, being influential, etc.
Backstory: I’m being promoted to lead a high profile team. The former team in this seat, first, kind of sucked/underperformed but we all tolerated them and, second, left the firm a number of months ago so it’s been vacant. I was circled to backfill and reestablish the team by local and national leadership. Though tangential to what I do now so not a completely wacky idea, I resisted for a while but I’ve been able to give it some thought and, with some asks being met by the firm about resources I’ll have, financial incentives, etc, I’m on board. The final details are still being ironed out but it’s happening. I’ll be the first and only woman leader in this role in the company and market I operate in (very male dominated; competition is 100% men across 6 competitive firms). I will have 5 below me with potential to grow large and fast. I feel like I just need some happy talk/reading that will help me think about how to be strategic, influential and hit the ground running, and help bring my mind in to focus some as I continue planning our first 30-60-90 days, etc. This is not my first time managing people fwiw, so that part doesn’t scare me. Industry is niche of finance. TIA!
Not a book but some podcasts on this topic: Manager Tools; Coaching for Leaders; and the Look and Sound of Leadership
Books I found helpful in my first manager role:
Leaders Eat Last
Radical Candor
The coaching Habit
All In
And whenever I am struggling with planning/new projects/etc I tend to reread the 12 week year and use that for goal setting.
I should say – my first manager role managing established professionals/teams. Managing established professionals, and directors and above is a completely different ballgame than managing people new in their career.
I also like The Five Choices and Crucial Conversations. The MasterClass on negotiation was also helpful as I started managing up more. It’s with a former hostage negotiator — Chris Voss, maybe?
Lots of 35 and 40 birthdays coming up for some good friends – any good gift ideas besides a bottle of wine?
I don’t drink, and am that vintage, so things I would love:
Great coffee, tea, matcha and a lovely mug.
3-4 foot lemon tree in a pot
Big beautiful cookbook and a specialty ingredient for use in its recipes
Tickets for us to go to something together
Cool piece of pottery
Things I don’t want:
Candles
Scarves (more of a winter gift, but man, so many scarves)
I’m going to have to hard disagree with you on candles. This board has opened my eyes to the world of Very Fancy Candles; it would never have occurred to me that that was a thing, I thought the fanciest candles came from like yankee candle or bath and body works /hangs head in shame. But no! Even Sephora sells them now! I would never buy myself a $70 candle but I’m so so pleased to receive it from someone else!
Ha, my SIL looooves expensive candles and it bothers my brother to no end that she’s literally burning money. So for birthdays/holidays/hostess gifts I always make it a point to buy her a nice candle ;)
Let’s say that candles are definitely a know your friend gift. I’m super scent sensitive and if I get one, it gets trashed immediately because I can’t stand having smelly things in the house – not even worth holding onto to regift. I certainly hope nobody spends $70 on a candle for me!
+1. I hate candles and never use them. I’m always amused at the suggestions that they are a crowd pleasing gift on here and I always assume I’m the weird one.
+1
I also hate candles and have regifted so many of them.
Our house is hilarious because it’s my husband who loves the fancy candles and I’m the one who is a combination of “too smelly/burning money/meh.”
Yep I don’t like anything scented, but my husband thinks it’s fancy and loves it.
Yep, candles immediately trashed here too.
Instant headache.
Definitely know your friends… except for the tickets (which I would love), I would pretty much swap your lists ;)
What I most want at this stage of life is to see friends. Tickets to do something big (concert, show etc) together would be great if it’s in your budget, but honestly just taking me to brunch would also be great. I can buy myself anything I want, and there isn’t much “stuff” I want anyway.
I would have never expected gifts for those occasions but would have appreciated very nice soap (consumable, indulgent) or a dinner or event out with the friend or friend group.
I also would not have expected gifts for these occasions.
Same. I turn 36 this fall and what I really want is a week to myself. Barring that, I’ve never been mad about a houseplant.
My friends and I generally do a birthday dinner. If something gift-wise comes to mind, great, but otherwise seeing friends and having time for dinner is honestly the best present.
Experiences and tickets are great, something that will have you spending time together.
If you do want a thing to hand over, maybe avoid novelty items that are only produced so that they can be gifted. Get a really excellent bottle of plain olive oil if they like cooking, not a lemon or basil infused one. If they do like cooking, some luxury ingredients could be nice – actual truffle (instead of a truffle product) if they love Italian, actual saffron (instead of twee spice blends in pretty pots) if they like Spanish or Middle Eastern, some really nice Madagascar vanilla pods if they like baking etc.
Gift cards to the shop where they spend their own hobby money is a go-to gift for me.
I never thought about it that way, but what a great rule of thumb: Don’t give things that are produced only to be gifted.
I may have that embroidered on pillows and sell them for gifts. ;)
I gave a budding chef a truffle once in our 20s and he still talks about that gift!
Sorry, should clarify these friends are hosting parties / dinners to celebrate so I will see them! And they are truly “hosting” in the sense that dinner and open bar will be covered, so I’d like to bring a nice gift
May I gently suggest to only gift cookbooks to those you know will appreciate the gesture? Otherwise, it can come across as a suggestion that their cooking needs some help. I love to cook and know my way around a kitchen and am thrilled with a gift of a cookbook, but I have several friends who think cooking is throwing something in a microwave or putting whatever they ordered from takeout on a nice plate. A cookbook to them would be an unwelcome suggestion that they need to study up on the difference between a saucepan and a skillet. It’s definitely a “know your audience” kind of gift.
Oh wow I wouldn’t have thought people could get offended by that. When I discovered the cookbook Plenty, I gave it to like everyone I knew. I’m not vegetarian or vegan, I just really like the book! I hope people didn’t think I was passive aggressively suggesting they should be vegetarian.
Ahaha, some of them probably did think that was what you were doing! Not your fault, but there are so many aggressive vegetarian or vegans that it’s hard to avoid that connotation.
Some chefs just fit with your own taste, and it’s so inspiring when that happens. I probably would have discreetly regifted Plenty, sorry, but that’s because I read his column in the Guardian and have never been inspired. I’m more of a Hemsley+Hemsley fan (and that’s definitely not something to gift people, since they come across as tediously missionary even to a fan).
I’ll be 35 next year and honestly my favorite gift recently was nice notebooks and pretty stickers. Apparently being 33 means I’m able to embrace my inner 7 year old. Barring that, my sister got us cool dessert bowls from the Unemployed Philosophers’ Guild a while back, and we loved them.
Are you doing the Warren Buffet method of “being greedy when others are fearful” as it relates to investing in this down market?
I have a Betterment index fund that I invest in aggressively but it is so scary!
For those of you that invest heavily or even just steadily through down markets, how do you mentally ride the highs and lows? Does it feel any different this time?
I’m the first person in my family with money (and I don’t have that much) and I can’t help but be skeptical of the stock market though I know investing in it is the smart thing to do vs letting the money decline in value in a safe savings account.
I’m ignoring all my accounts. I’m old enough that I had amounts (albeit tiny) invested during the Dot Com era, 9-11, whatever Bush-era recession we had, and the Great Recession. As long as you just ignore, you’ll come out the other side in better shape than you went in.
Problems happen to people who are over-leveraged or have circumstances (health, job loss with insufficient savings, divorce, etc) that force liquidation of assets.
If you don’t have a decent cash cushion, now is as good of a time as any to start an emergency fund (ie, put your new savings in savings, rather than investing until you get to a comfortable amount).
Could have written this myself…we did lose some money – like it was straight-up gone – in the 2008 crash but we left what we had in the market and it rebounded. I am not looking at my retirement accounts right now because we don’t need the money any time soon. We’ve got 10-15 years, minimum, before we would need to take any withdrawals from the accounts, so why look? We live below our means, we have not borrowed against the retirement accounts, we haven’t borrowed against our home equity. We have plenty in cash to cover any job losses that may result, and my husband and I both have technical skills that would help us find new jobs if we had to (although our age is starting to work against us). I moved our son’s college money into a fund that is all munis, treasuries and cash equivalents at the beginning of the year anticipating that the market would crash this year – he is two years from college so I felt fine losing out on any “gains” as a result of that move (and we lost out on nothing; in fact, the fund his money is in is way outperforming the market right now because interest rates on treasuries are higher than they have been in years).
So – we’ll wait it out. If this dip in the market is giving folks the willies, I highly recommend revisiting your investment strategy to ensure you’re in one of those structures where the risk decreases the closer you get to retirement. Take advantage of lessons learned by previous generations and make sure you’re ratcheting risk downward as you get closer and closer to retirement age. The market isn’t a Vegas casino and playing big to win big isn’t a great strategy when losing means you’ll be working at Wal-Mart in your 70s to afford luxuries like food. If you’re in your 20s and 30s, you absolutely need to just ignore the market, ignore your account balances and leave the money alone. If you’re in your 40s or 50s, think carefully about rebalancing but also, leave your money alone. Most folks saw the bear market coming a mile away and like all bear markets, this too shall pass.
I’m a hold steady and continue current autofunding as planned person. My horizon on all this is 20+ years though for retirement; 5 years for college funds (but they have been very conservatively reset as of last fall).
I just always do the same thing- auto contributions every month, invested in the same portfolio. I simply never check the balances except for annually. My investment threshold is long term, what happens today is not relevant
We threw another 10k into our brokerage account yesterday. We have a lot of money in cash right now in hopes of buying a house, but houses have almost doubled in our area so we’ll only be able to buy if move somewhere else. Might as well invest the money than lose it to inflation. If we move elsewhere, we still have plenty for a down payment and a significant emergency fund, so not concerned if markets continue to drop for another year or two. As long as you don’t need the money in the next few years, you shouldn’t worry about it. If you do, don’t invest it (or only a portion of it).
Yeah i just don’t even check my balances and continue my autocontributions. I’ll be more stressed about in my 50s, but right now I’m 37 so I need to just let it set there regardless of what the market is doing.
Way to be investing when it’s not typical of your background! I also do not know of a ton of people who invest in the stock market or know enough to want to talk about it. So I can relate to your question. I’ve been just steadily investing in just typical market index funds for about the last two years (outside of boring retirement target date index funds in my tax advantage accounts). There is an interesting account on Instagram I find useful: personalfinanceclub. They have some quick infographics around steady investing versus timing the market. The general take away they seem to show is that it’s really the length of time and consistency of investing that determines best outcomes.
I figure, what else am I going to do with this money that will be better? Savings accounts have such low interest that we’re actually losing money now due to inflation. We have a house but I don’t think of it as an investment, even though it has appreciated a lot in the last few years. Buying a rental and being a landlord sounds extremely difficult. I don’t believe in crypto/NFTs/whatever hot item is out there, that is already now losing value. And it’s been shown time and time again that investing periodically over time in an index fund is the way to build wealth v. stock picking or anything else.
Your first line is spot on as well. There aren’t a whole lot of opportunities right now NOT to lose at least some money. This thread is reminding me to look in to i bonds, though….
I-bonds purchased between now and October will carry a 9.62% interest rate. I’ve been buying I-bonds for years and some of mine now have interest rates above 11%. I just maxed us out (bought enough to put us at the $10k threshold) for the year; I think it will be the safest and most lucrative place to have our money for the next little while.
Definitely look into I Bonds. I bought the yearly max in January and am very glad I did.
Thanks, got my account set up.
I’m late-30s, public sector professional so comfortable but not high-earning, have a healthy emergency fund and retirement savings, and I just received an un-expected inheritance in the high 5 figures. The check cleared the same day as the abortion decision leaked, so I made some larger than usual donations, then put it all in a VTSAX. YOLO?
I am you, only without the unexpected windfall (and I am sorry for your loss or the circumstances that led to the inheritance)! I have to laugh every time my fee-only financial planner sends market news to his mailing list, as he very well knows I keep nearly everything in index funds.
OMG emails have gotten so wild recently. A mortgage broker I contacted about a refi about a year ago is sending near daily emails with titles like “Your credit score: does it REALLY matter?”. Things must be getting desperate for them.
I also keep getting emails from my fee-only financial advisor like “Webinar: Why Now is Not the Time to Panic” and “Market Volatility: Should You Move Your Money?” (the answer, of course, is no). I haven’t contacted him and won’t until December, when we’re due for our next check-in/check-up. I am sure they are busy bees right now dealing with panicked investors wanting to cash out.
I’m also not from a moneyed family, and I don’t invest heavily, but just steadily, through all markets. I try not to look at it. If 100% stock was the right level of aggression for you, it probably still is, although I don’t think there’s shame in doing a 90/10 (or whatever) split if it means you’ll keep investing and sleep at night. About two years ago I started worrying that inflation would head up and now have about 8% in stuff I think of as inflation resistant, which was a good bet on my part, but not something I’d do now in reaction (and at any rate, people are flocking to lower-risk stuff now and there are not the opportunities there were).
I don’t try to sell high but I also don’t try to buy (more) low. There are people earning literally thousands of times what I do with powerful computers who try to predict this stuff and get it grievously wrong. For giggles, sometimes I read old “predictions” about the market and when it will collapse and even big respected names get it wrong by years sometimes.
I think you’re doing great and I would just only check in on a pre-existing schedule (I deep dive every six months, some people do quarterly or annually).
If you had been working in sweats and t-shirts at home for the past couple of years and were about to start a new job that’s partially in a business-casual office in academia, how much would you budget for getting your work wardrobe back in shape? Bonus: what would you get?
East Coast? West Coast? If West Coast, I’d do a heavy Eileen Fisher East Bay Therapist vibe at a cost level appropriate to your age / stage.
New England.
Preppy New England? In that case, I feel like jackets are a good investment (J Crew, Tuckernuck, Halsbrook or similar).
Or if it is more of a Dropkick Murphys vibe, Doc Martins and a good leather jacket instead of a blazer.
Nicer sweats and t-shirts?
I work in that exact environment, and you probably don’t need to buy anything. I have some nicer outfits that I wear if I need to venture near the president’s office, but other than that, it’s very casual. Are jeans ok in this office? If so, jeans and a sweater (a/c tends to be cold) is my go-to. Otherwise, most folks are in some sort of pull-on ponte pants and a sweater or popover type shirt. You probably have stuff that’s just fine in your closet. At my big-state-U, you stick out a lot more if you’re on-trend than if you’re off.
IDK but if I am paying university tuition, I am going to be disappointed to see adults in sweats unless they are students or exercising or it’s spirit wear.
If I am paying university tuition, adults can be wearing a Carmen Miranda headdress as long as they can process my financial aid correctly and timely.
Seriously, pay for staff at my big state U is so abysmal nobody ought say a damn thing to any of them about what they wear.
Pay for cafeteria workers and housekeeping is very low, often shockingly low. They dress for their roles and wouldn’t want to be in ruin-able personal clothes. Office staff . . . please look professional. Like non-university professionals. It’s not unique to universities, but at some point, people are going to be vaping during weddings and wearing t-shirts with words to funerals because no one is adulting during their 9-5.
Entry level office staff here make the same, or sometimes less than the custodial staff, and often a bachelor’s degree is required. It’s shameful, but staff salaries aren’t a part of rankings calculations the way faculty salaries are, so they get overlooked again, and again until vital processes grind to a halt because they can’t get anyone competent to do them. On the off chance a department manages to find someone to do the work in a halfway competent manner for $28k/year, I hope nobody’s saying a word to them about what they wear.
I feel like if you aren’t a coach, you shouldn’t be wearing sweats to work. Especially if it is office work.
Students pay university tuition for access to my expertise, not my fashion sense.
That is literally true for everyone who is not Miranda Priestly.
This is one of the more entitled tales I’ve read here.
I agree that academic wear tends to be frumpy! It was easy for me to slip into elastic waist bands and sloppy cardigans when I had a position at a law school because no one bothered to look decent. Now that I am back in private practice, I look foward to putting on a cute outfit for depositions and luncheons. I like more tailored jackets with tops and nicer jeans or trousers.
I don’t know what I would budget–that is so individual–but having worked in academia for many years, my advice is to dress in a way that differentiates you from students. So, not jeans and a tee, but jeans, a tee, and a casual blazer or jardigan, and real shoes, not sneakers. Maybe stylish sneakers, but not running shoes, for example. Casual dresses, ankle pants, nice flats, jeans that are not distressed, etc. Don’t dress like the students, and dress like a professional adult.
I don’t know if there is any risk of that, unless OP is gone full 90s. My students look like they walked out of 1998 issue of Seventeen.
But I tend to wear dresses and flats for teaching, channeling my inner anthropologist with lots of linen and a nice scarf. I’ll wear jeans and converse for the days I’m just in the office, with a sweater or slouchy top.
What’s your role? I know some junior faculty (especially women) dress up so students take them more seriously, but on the staff side of academia it’s pretty much anything goes unless you’re a really high level exec who has regular contact with the president or a provost. I wore jeans and t-shirts to work pre-Covid (I’m fully remote now).
I’m going to be a contrarian and say this is highly dependent on the department. Jeans do not fly in mine (higher ed admin). I would go in the first week and see what’s going to work best in your specific environment. My uniform is usually some variation on tailored pants (ankle or full length are both fine), a pretty blouse, and cardigan. On days when I need to be more dressed up, it’s easy to swap the cardigan for a blazer.
What is your overall style and body type? I am too short and just have the wrong frame for carrying off the drape-y Eileen Fisher look. Also in New England so I tend to default to classic prep. I used to travel more so I had my black base wardrobe (winter) and my grey/navy base wardrove (spring/summer/fall). For bottoms I’d get 1-2 pairs of dark skinny jeans (still the easiest to tuck into snow boots in winter), 1-2 pairs of washable slacks in solid colors (one in grey/navy and one in black), and a midi skirt in a neutral for fall/spring (to pair with knee high boots or sandals). If you wear dresses, I’d find a shirt dress, an a-line dress, and maaaaybe a sheath if you need to present to a fancy audience. I’d also get 2-3 blazers or jackets- something in either tweed or cordoury, something you can wear over a dress (like the JCrew going out blazer) and something ‘casual’ like a jean jacket, moto jacket, or field jacket. I tend to go cheaper on tops – grab whatever blouses/sweaters look cute and are natural fabrics/washable at Ann Taylor/Lofy/Jcrew/H&M, wash on gentle and hang to dry – mine last at least 2-3 years this way.
Ok, I teach law school and was wearing jeans, a black top, Rothy the Point, and the JCrew Going Out Blazer I got because of recommendations on this board, and literally a student told me in the bathroom that I looked great. So I now wear some version of that for all of my classes.
How times have changed since I was in law school a decade ago! Back then the prof uniform was frumpy, out-of-date suits left over from when you were in practice + comfort shoes, for men and women alike. The old guard who had been teaching for 30+ years went with the eccentric old professor vibe–corduroy blazers, skinny ties, fraying shirt collars for men, the female equivalent for women. The a-holes who had been insurance defense attorneys wore shiny suits and shirts with monogrammed French cuffs no matter how long they’d been out of practice. If any of them even owned jeans the students never saw them.
That’s awesome! Would you wear the JCrew Going Out Blazer in navy blue? I have plenty of black blazer options but wondering what color pants I could wear the navy blue version with. I usually wear trousers of some sort – business casual.
Business-casual isn’t casual, so no sweatpants. There are many soft pants though that look right in a business-casual office, especially if black or darker shades (olive, etc.). Sweater blazers are versatile and give you flexibility with what you wear under (tee, elevated tee, blouse). Banana Republic Factory separates have been great for me now that my office is much more casual but I am in roles where I cannot look sloppy.
I would get the Eileen Fisher slim crepe ankle pants. For me they’re as comfy as sweats.
do you think writers are actively LOLing as they write this? if you have sniffles during allergy season and get a negative you should go get a PCR test just in case? everyone i know with the latest variant only had a positive for a day or two max. we’re all getting this latest one.
https://www.self.com/story/ba-2-12-1-variant-covid-symptoms
IDK but my kid who was + had a clear obvious positive after just moments on an at-home test. 500 tests later, no one else in the household is +, so I’d just wait 36 hours and retest at home if sniffles are usual for you. If sniffles are not usual for your allergies, you do you (PCR test or whatever). So many people I know who are not out living their best lives (and haven’t been generally) are getting it now.
Also, the kid who had it had clear and unmistakable symptoms with a defined onset.
When public health institutions decide to throw their hands up in the air and pass all the responsibility back onto individuals, things get ridiculous real fast.
I have year round “seasonal” allergies even with otc meds. I will have a runny nose, sneeze and/or sniffle at some time during the day every day (I swear I’m not a drippy sniffly mess, though). I’m not getting a PCR test every day.
+1
We may have had this two weeks ago – in addition to mild cold symptoms we also got nauseous, which seemed weird. We used our government-issued home tests, all negative. Most testing facilities near us have shut down; drugstores have cut way back on the staff they’re allocating to do Covid testing, so there were no available testing slots within 25 miles of us when we looked. We bought some home tests at Walgreens (got the last 2 boxes) and tested the next day; those were also negative. At that point we were not going to keep buying home tests and we still couldn’t find a testing site with available appointments, so we just stayed home for a couple of days and whatever it was ran its course, and we were fine after that and resumed normal life.
I understand in our area they’re tracking wastewater, which is probably about the only way to really get a handle on what’s going on with infections. We know a couple of people locally who tested positive and didn’t report it to the health department and didn’t stay quarantined for 5 days. We would have quarantined had we tested positive, but as I said – after two consecutive days of negative home tests, and no fever or serious symptoms indicating it was anything more than a cold, we elected to assume we just had a weird cold vs. assuming we had Covid, and I imagine most people are doing the same thing. This to me is the biggest indicator that the pandemic is “over” – not only does the government not care if you’re positive, no one is even making testing easily available any more. It seems to me like they don’t want to know.
Huh. I tested positive on a PCR 24 hours before a rapid. And then tested positive on rapids for 14 days.
Yeah, it’s silly to PCR test at this point. Why add that errand to your life. Take a home test and if it’s positive, stay home.
I think the only reason to go out of your way for a PCR test is if you plan to see vulnerable people or want to know if you’ve had it recently so you can stop worrying for a bit or know for future reference, etc. If i feel fine and home test is negative, esp. more than one, I am not going to question it “just in case” that’s wrong. It’s entirely possible that I’ve had it at some point and had no symptoms. Mr. AIMS and our youngest both recently had colds and had 4 negative tests between them as numbers are up in NY. No one else got sick and we stayed home from school while kid had symptoms. As our pediatrician said, “colds and other viruses do still exist.” I think at some point we have to just live with this being what it is.
I recently purchased light pink leather flats, and of course when wearing them for the first time, I got a spot of some kind. I thought it was just a water drip, but it hasn’t faded – it’s a small, slightly darker spot. Was I supposed to put some kind of leather protectant on them first before wearing?? What are your favorite leather cleaners? This is why I can’t have nice things! Thanks for any tips…
An oil spot may eventually spread / dissipate / lighten or it may not. I cannot have nice things so 90% of my shoes are black. You can still spray with stain protectors though (like the kind for suede) but IMO leather cleaners may make the problem worse. Cornstarch may be your friend if it is oily to blot it up.
Is it possible you dropped something oil-based, like skin oil or salad dressing? I feel like those are the hardest stains.
Is it suede or smooth leather?
It’s smooth leather. Thanks!
Hm then it does seem like it’s something other than water. I’d take the shoes to a cobbler, they should be able to help or at least point you in the right direction.
What is it with all the long blazers? They are SO unflattering on me. Give me a cropped or nipped blazer any day of the week. Suggestions? Thoughts?
I look like I’m wearing Grandpa’s suit coat. And I’m 5’8″, so in theory, I should have the height to pull them off.
Same. I’m 5-4 with a short torso and this is practically a dress.
I’m also 5’8 and too short for this. They are hideous.
I think you need to be 5’13” a la CJ Cregg and/or to have broad shoulders to be able to pull off this look.
I like cropped/tailored blazers for true professional wear (like court) but I’ve decided that I like the oversized blazer look for the office. I planned to get some, but now it’s a million degrees!
I bought one quite similar to the one pictured in this post and thought I liked it, but by the time I got it back from the tailor after having the sleeves shortened, I decided I looked like a kid in her mom’s lab assistant uniform. *sigh*
They are the best for tall me and I need to hoard them every time they come around.
The shrunken blazer era was the absolute worst!
What would you do in this situation? I’m a mid-level manager and am part of a long-term project team. The project is going to last four years. We just finished the first year. Try as I might, I really do not enjoy this project at all. The idea of spending the next three years on this time-sucking, joyless venture fills me with dread. I have tapped into my team’s expertise when I can, but ultimately, there’s only so much I can delegate. Due to my role, I am expected to lead a certain aspect of the project. If it were just that, it would be fine, but I’m being pulled into high-level strategy discussions that I dislike immensely and find tedious.
I suppose I could ask my boss to get me off the project, but a) pretty sure the answer would be no; and b) politically, I think that would be very bad for me. WWYD? How would you make this more bearable? It is fairly high visibility but since I work in the public sector, it’s not like I’m going to get extra money or recognition from this.
I would job hunt.
Same. Three years is too long to hate your job.
Talk to your boss about the parts of the project you find tedious (strategy), and ask if you can be excised from those, specifically. It sounds like you don’t mind the parts of this project that you’re expected to own, so I think this is a clear next step – ask and see!
I mean, if OP hates the strategy part, it’s definitely a lost cause. If there’s ever anything that’s going to be interesting on a project, that’s it. That’s usually what people feel left out of. Concur with the advice to job search and leave.
If I was managing an employee who was ready to quit over part of a project they hate, I’d want to try to get them off that facet of the project. Maybe OP doesn’t have a great relationship with her boss, I’m just saying that I’d rather not lose an employee over something that they hate – even if, to you, it’s the coolest part of the project.
I think your options are:
– suck it up
– switch jobs
– trying to get off the project, with a high risk of the answer being no and forced to move to one of the above two options
Unfortunately, I think the only way to make it more bearable is to make a decision and pursue that heavily. If there are reasons you want to stay with your job, remind yourself of them often. If you’re going to switch jobs- start actively searching now. If you’re willing to switch jobs over this I’d argue it’s worth talking to your boss about getting off the project (I’d probably do it once you’re actively interviewing, pre-offer so you can exit fairly quickly if needed).
Can someone help me with outermost layers? I struggle with frigid offices in the SEUS where in-office it is sub-70 and outside it is warm and soon to be quite humid. I feel like blazers stay on indoors as part of an outfit but I am struggling with more casual pieces.
Leather jacket
Jeans / denim jacket (blue one, white one)
Olive utility jacket –> are these all outdoor jackets (like a trench coat) that you remove indoors?
I feel like with anything but a blazer or cardigan, I need to remove (and the cuffs can make computer typing annoying) indoors (and then freeze) whereas my cardigans are just meh (old compromise pieces bought in desperation when I worse dresses more). How can I do outfits what really work, especially indoors? I don’t so much need outdoor layers during the day generally, just inside.
A leather jacket, jean jacket, shirt jacket, or utility jacket can be part of an outfit to be worn indoors. The stiffer, thicker, and less fitted the jacket, the more it is like outerwear and the less it is like a part of an outfit. Softer, thinner, and more fitted styles work better indoors.
I would not wear a jacket in a winter fabric or material–fuzzy fabric, flannel, leather, corduroy, etc.–during the warm season, even indoors.
Look for “indoor” utility jackets — the ones i have are a little more lightweight. I also have one or two in linen. Jean jackets are fine to wear indoors (again, if an indoor weight). You can also look for bomber jackets, twill jackets, moto (non-leather) jackets, etc. And you can find jackets in a denim-jacket cut, but made of twill or linen. Or, buy a couple of new cardigans that you really like, if that’s what you feel comfortable in.
Signed, forgot my denim jacket today because it’s hot outdoors (already!), and I’m going to freeze inside.
Also SEUS – I have an office cardigan that was a bit more of an investment that I just leave at the office (light gray so matches pretty much everything) and some ponte knit blazers that do not have buttons on the cuffs. A jardigan or two might also be your answer. Since these are pieces worn often, spending a bit more and then taking care of them to last makes sense, I think.
Adding that I would not find any of the pieces you mentioned to be comfortable to work in so I would end up taking them off in my office and switching to something softer.
The J Crew downtown field jacket is a perfect utility jacket that can be worn indoors as part of an outfit.
I have the same issue with jacket sleeves not letting me type- no way I could wear a denim jacket at my desk. When I lived in the SEUS, I ended up wearing a Patagonia nanopuff at my desk all summer, which I could get away with in a relatively casual environment, but I agree it’s not ideal. I just took it off when not at my desk and actually seeing people.
I think a good test on whether you remove those jackets indoors is whether you can wear them open and with 3/4 arm length with the sleeves rolled up or not.
Leather jacket – a thin suede leather moto or bomber will read more indoor than a thick, black moto jacket.
Denim – a stretchier or more draped fabric will read more indoor than thick and stiff 100 percent cotton, look at shackets or accessory style jean jackets rather than hard-wearing denim.
Olive utility jacket – a thinner material like tencel or linen, or unlined cotton, with less hardware and a softer feel will work.
I have what I affectionally call a “desk blanket” that’s basically like a big shawl/wrap thing that lives at my desk so I can wrap up when chilly and take off when not. Mine is acrylic but a cashmere or merino wool one would be nice too. Kind of like one of those “airplane scarves”!
Same! I have multiple shawls that I keep at work. If don’t have a “topper”, I drape a shawl over my shoulder or in my lap.
I got something like that from Loft – kind of a pashmina with armholes/sleeves. The “sleeves” only come down to my elbows, so it doesn’t get in the way and is nice over a long sleeve shirt.
I live in the DC area and get a lot of use out of a bunch of linen/linen cotton blend jackets I bought from Loft over the years. Sadly they are several years old, but I would advise looking for linen jackets, both structured and unstructured. I have one that’s moto jacket style, one that’s chore jacket style, and one that’s kind of like a denim jacket but the sleeves are wide. Mine seem to be knit rather than woven so while they do look a little rumpled, they don’t crease like woven linen does. Although I do embrace the wrinkles with linen!
Initially read that as “big shawl/tarp” and it still tracked.
Our old house is finally, finally selling and we are trying to think what to do with the $ from the sale. It’s not a ton of money unfortunately. Is it better to put it all in one/two places or spread it out a little?
For context, we have DH’s student loans + one car loan, which are roughly the same amount and which together would slightly exceed the sale proceeds. We could also pay off some more of the current house principal or save some.
I’d knock out the car loan and/or the student loan. Presuming you have a decent mortgage, I don’t think you get much for putting more in there. Personally, if the car and student loan are cheaper than the current interest rate, I’d look into any home renovations you want to do. Kitchens bathroom, etc.
Personally, I would throw half at the highest interest debt (likely the student loans) and save/invest the rest. Maybe set aside a small portion for a small house project that I could do myself but would be done better by hiring a pro. But I’m in a situation where my savings was significantly depleted when I purchased my house last year so I’d feel emotionally more secure having a bigger cash cushion than I do now. What would make you feel the most emotionally/financially secure? Having a larger cushion or reducing the amount going out every month in loan payments?
I’d put it towards the highest interest loans.
What about investing?
As for debt, it depends what your interest rates are and how much the payments impact your life. I was paying $2k/mo on my 8.5% student loans, so yeah I paid them off as quickly as possible. But my car loan is at 1% and the $500/mo isn’t that big a deal to me, so I’ll let that ride for the life of the loan (I drive cars into the ground, unless I get in a wreck I will have the car minimum 10 years).
I’d wait on the student loans for now, unless they are private loans. I personally would pay down my current mortgage and try to recast for a lower payment.
I would pay off the student loans and put the rest towards savings. This is largely emotional, in that student loans are unsecured debt, not dischargeable in bankruptcy, etc. Downside is that a moratorium could be extended or a bailout could happen (I bet on the former), but to me, the peace of mind would be worthwhile.
Thanks gang, appreciate the insight!
I would pay off the car loan and invest the rest. Stocks are on sale right now, I hear. ;)
I wouldn’t pay down the mortgage because it doesn’t help with your day-to-day cash flow and your interest rate is probably quite low. (Unless you can recast the mortgage to lower the payments, in which case it might be a good option.)
I would hang back on the student loans for now in case loan forgiveness comes through.
Without knowing your interest rates, this question is impossible to answer. I personally would invest, unless any of the loans are higher than 7%.
We had a change of plans for our end of June vacation and are now looking to book something in Florida then. Any recommendations? Will be just me and my husband, and leaving two small kids at home, so we’re looking for something relaxing and not a party city or overly catering to kids. Requirements are basically a nice hotel close to the beach, laid back vibe, maybe a few activities nearby. Sanibel Island is sounding nice, but should we think about other cities? Again, not looking for a party city or a hot night life, so probably not a Miami Beach type place.
This blogger’s FL island vacation intrigued me
https://bradleyagather.com/2022/05/02/gasparilla-island/
We went to Little Gasparilla Island 18 years ago; we loved it but be warned, you bring in your own drinking water as the water supply isn’t potable (unless something’s changed since then). You also need to bring your food and pack out your trash. No restaurants, but they are a water taxi away.
It was exactly what we wanted for a quiet first anniversary celebration and is also when I knew for sure we were solid. After all, we spent a full week with just each other’s company and we had a blast.
Florida in June is going to be hot AF even at the beach.
Signed,
A Floridian who is planning a road trip north at the same time
Amelia Island
+1 to Amelia! I’ve been in June and it hasn’t been crowded. It’s very quiet and not at all a party scene. It’s lovely!
Go to the east coast; the Gulf gets uncomfortably hot in the summer.
Yeah the breeze coming off the Atlantic helps a lot with the heat. I’d look around the St. Augustine area.
Go to the east coast, the Gulf side is sweltering and the water so warm you don’t feel refreshed. Check out Palm Beach. Or if you’re not set on FL, maybe the Sanctuary on Kiawah?
If the choice of FL is because of Covid testing, not sure what current USVI policies are, but that may feel more fun.
Singer island
Thanks all for the suggestions so far! Good to know about the Gulf v. East Coast. I know FL will be hot in June, but I’d prefer the slightly less hot side. And for context, yes, looking to stay in the U.S. and we are trying to find somewhere outside of our usual Northeast places, where we’re coming from (which I love, but want something different), and also staying on the East Coast.
Amelia/Fernandina’s a good option, though I agree with everyone Florida is hot in June and I wouldn’t go to the more southern parts of Florida. Most of the Georgia and SC coasts are chill and not party beaches (exception is Myrtle Beach, and to a lesser extent, Wrightsville and Carolina Beach). Wild Dunes on Isle of Palms near Charleston is a good option. Jekyll Island Club’s Ocean Club is nice, but IMO everything on Jekyll is overpriced right now and the restaurant situation is not great (my parents live there). Sea Island, though not sure how it is currently. Others I have no personal experience with but hear good things: Kiawah (SC), Sanderling (NC Outer Banks)
I’ve only been to the Destin area with kids, but there’s an adults only resort there that looks lovely (Henderson Park Inn). If I were traveling without my kids, finding an adults only hotel/resort would be my priority. You don’t want to leave your kids at home just to be surrounded by other people’s kids and Florida is a BIG family travel place.
Anon for this but does anyone else get bloated/gassy AFTER their period? Over the years things have shifted and I find myself bloated after – sometimes like day 5-6; sometimes right after is ok but it’ll be more like a week or so after it ends so I supposed closer to ovulating. Any tips? Is this just being 40+ that things change?
Yup!!! AND sometimes I get an end-of-period headache, too. I’m 38 for context.
I have a duvet question. I come from a long line of quilters, so I didn’t grow up with them. I have a comforter that has some holes in the fabric. Can I just buy a duvet (I guess a “duvet cover”) and stuff the comforter into that? And if the comforter is a Queen, a Queen duvet cover will fit over it?
I’m struggling to find a replacement comforter to go in the room it’s in.
You could but I wouldn’t. Duvets really work best with a down or down alternative insert. I’d toss your old quilt (or make it a picnic blanket or something) and get nice, new bedding. It really is lovely.
This should work, though it won’t be as fluffy as a conventional duvet, and it will be a pain to line up the corners. But I do this sometimes as seasons change when the duvet is too heavy for me but an empty duvet cover is too light.
Yes, you absolutely can! I’ve done the same myself in the past. You don’t have to use down in a duvet cover – heck, I have a vellux blanket in ours right now because I like just a little bit of weight on top of me. If your current comforter is an oversized queen, you might need a king, but otherwise queen for queen will work perfectly.
Yes, I put comforters and electric heat blankets in duvet covers. Because washing covers is easier than washing the whole thing. You might already know this, but I didn’t grow up with duvets and covers… and it was life changing to watch on youtube how to insert them burrito/sushi style. Trying to stuff them in any other way will only lead to frustration.
What happens with houses that can’t/won’t sell? For some context I live in a fancy neighbourhood with historic homes, my neighbours house was purchased by foreign flippers who used only builder grade materials (LVT, MDF trim, vinyl windows, etc). No one will buy this thing, it’s been on the market forever and houses in our neighborhood usually sell within a day. It’s just such poor quality and all the grey makes it seem dated. The flippers obviously want to offload this thing but can’t. So what happens?
It stays on the market forever; they lower the price enough so someone buys it; or they renovate it again, this time properly. It depends on their own need for the money.
I rented my house out. It’s in a location that never really rebounded from the great recession. Lots of people have decent jobs to make a rent payment, but relatively few manage to save up enough for a down payment. There’s nothing wrong with the house (it’s actually nicer than my current place) other than the location. As a rental, I break even. The current tenant is a bit under market, but he is low maintenance, so I’m not going to mess with that.
Either sellers lower the price and it sells, it rents or it sits there.
The bank takes it back if they can’t pay or won’t pay. Then the bank sells it probably at a very discounted price.
This happened across the street from me. The house sat for 7 years, vacant, owned by the bank. It was a huge eye sore because banks don’t care to properly maintain the property.
You drop the price until it sells. Or turn it into a rental. Unless you’re in a very small town, there will always be someone who buys if you drop the price enough.
They reduce the price.
The flippers will either keep dropping the price until it sells or they will let it go into foreclosure. If it goes into foreclosure, be prepared for it to be vacant for a long time before someone buys it at auction and puts it through another round of updating and re-lists, or moves in.
They lower the price until there is a buyer.
We had a house that wasn’t selling at our preferred price. We rented it out for a year to (almost) cover the mortgage. Then we dropped the price by about 20% and finally someone was interested at that price point. Every home has SOME price at which it will sell. The question is just whether the seller will accept it.
This. And for proof of the ‘every house will sell’ logic see the case of the VA house that sold with illegal squatters still residing in it.
FYI, the woman who was the “squatter” was found and interviewed – she and her daughter were living in the house and acting as a caretaker/companion to the elderly man who lived there. The man’s children moved him to assisted living and put the house for sale without giving her time to find a new place.
Either they lower the price to make it enticing enough for someone to buy ( and perhaps upgrade) or they run out of money/ decide to cut their losses and stop paying for whatever mortgage/ taxes they are currently paying and it goes to foreclosure. I know their are lots of ppl on this board looking to buy right now, maybe share your neighborhood if you are comfortable?
I honestly couldn’t in good conscience recommend this house to any of the readers here. The flippers truly ruined this house. They only did ugly cosmetic upgrades and left things like birds living in the soffit.
When we were looking for houses in 2018, I was 100 percent sure that no one who designed the kitches ever cooked a meal in their life. Flippers are awful. We liked most of the work done in our flipped house but still replaced all the cheap light fixtures and we had to redo the hardwood floor because they did such a crappy job. At least the kitchen and bathrooms were good.
The “show kitchen designed by someone who doesn’t cook” is frightfully common in my area, even among high-dollar new builds.
I hear you! But depending on where you are and the price of the house, there may be someone out there willing to deal with that in order to get in that neighborhood. Not everyone wants/needs “move in ready.” Not trying to pressure you to share location, at all! Just a general comment that I’ve seen what some ppl on this board consider dealbreakers for house buying and it’s not unusual that it’s stuff I’d be willing to deal with to get in a really competitive neighborhood ( for the right price). FWIW, am currently under contract on a house that needs quite a bit of work but meets a lot of other needs, is well located, and is well below what we were approved for in terms of purchase price… so we have the money left over to fix what needs fixing. I learned on this board “ you can change [almost] anything about your house besides the location.”
I’m not even sure someone could restore this house if they wanted to. The only thing original inside is some hardwood under the LVT, but the house is truly garbage now, hollow core doors where there once was solid wood, they put up drywall despite that it was built to be breathable with clay brick and plaster so the walls will no doubt mold, etc. It would take many hundreds of thousands of dollars just to undo the mess they made and even then it would still not be good.
We are under contract for a home. Which is great because this market is crazy. I don’t have buyers remorse but really overwhelmed at the amount of repairs that should be done because the sellers did a great job of cutting every corner possible when doing repairs and renovations. I guess this is what home ownership is? Just wanted to vent.
Yes, this is home ownership. Welcome to the money pit. It never ends.
I mean, in a normal market, you would have been able to negotiate a price such that you could account for all the cut corners or chosen a different house so it wasn’t your problem. But, times being what they are, yep, you get to spend all your disposal income on home repairs…yay?
Yes, today’s sellers aren’t fixing up houses in order to sell. (And truth be told, even in slower markets, sellers often did relatively inexpensive but attractive cosmetic upgrades and ignored expensive but necessary structural fixes (I’m looking at you, first house I purchased in 1994).
Yes, we have an old house with an addition that was done extremely poorly by the previous owners. It isn’t to the point that anything is unsafe, but only barely. We bought it at a good price but every time we rennovate something we need to add 20% to the cost (on top of the extra we budget) because at this point our contratcor knows he’ll find something stupid/cheaply done that he needs to remediate. Every other house we looked at in our price range was in worse shape OR had good bones but hadn’t been updated since the 70s. So we went with our place which needed mostly cosmetic work to start and have tackled it slowly over the last decade. It stinks, but at least you can renovate to your exact taste!
Not to mention houses simply need ongoing maintenance – roofs need to be replaced, exteriors need to be painted, etc. etc. We set aside our tax refund checks for one ‘big’ project every year and just budget for the other annoying stuff (AC dies/water heater needs to be replaced/appliances break or die/etc.).
This is really good advice! I’m going to try to set aside tax refunds for this purpose. Thanks!
I recently had (in the scheme of things) mild COVID, but I’m still tired and I took a couple weeks off working out. Any tips for getting back into it? Should I wait until I’m not tired? Just start with light workouts and see how I feel? I’ve never totally understood the guidance around exercising when you have a cold or similar and this just seems to be dragging on. Any advice or encouragement would be great!
Everyone and every illness is different. Start with an easy workout, maybe just a walk, and see how you feel. If you feel fine, keep going and gradually increase. If you feel bad, take some more time off.
A doctor friend told me “moderate exercise and it’ll eventually get better.”
I first tried working out 7 days after I tested positive and felt terrible, then tried again at 11 days post positive test and survived (haha). 14 days post-positive was the first time I started to feel like I wasn’t dying with a light workout. Don’t push yourself, but slowly getting back into the habit of moving was helpful for me.
People with post-viral ME/CFS are really encouraging people to take it easy until fully recovered. Moving is still great so long as it’s comfortable, but it’s thought that trying to “push through” or challenge oneself can be risky when still recovering. The goal is to recover fully!
I waited until I felt less tired and started super gradually. Ten minute neighborhood walks and built back from there.
A couple weeks is not that long in the grand scheme of things. I would give yourself another week, then start out with long walks, yoga/stretching, and then gradually ramp up. Listen to your body.
Yeah, even with regular flu back in the day, I’d take a few weeks to get back to full activity. Like, if I went to my gym class, maybe I didn’t keep going for the full interval of the circuit. Or for ballet, maybe I’d make it through barre, and then next time maybe I’d make it through barre and beginning of center, but bail before the really vigorous stuff.
Tablet recs for grad school?
I’m going to be working full time in school part time and my program is online. I figure a tablet will be nice for doing assignments /readings, pulling up notes/readings while I’m in zoom class on my laptop, and having some more flexibility (not having to always bring my laptop with me).
I had a kindle years ago but have never had an actual tablet. Cheaper end is obviously better since I’m paying for school too.
My spouse loves the ipad pro for this purpose, but it was quite expensive. I don’t think you need something like that, especially if grad school is in the humanities and you’re mostly typing notes. He reports most students stick with laptops, many have lower priced ipads, and a few have microsoft surface (?)–though I think that is as expensive as the bells & whitles ipads. If you buy new tech, look into getting a student discount with your .edu address. I think Apple does 5% off.
Yup. Humanities/social sciences. I would use the tablet for reading/notes/watching lectures and would use my computer for papers/projects/statistical analysis.
I’ve never had a tablet so don’t know what features are common but I think I would like some sort of word processor and a detachable keyboard ? I know in the kindle app (which I have on my phone) I can highlight in app which is great
A Microsoft Surface is exactly what you need. And more versatile than an iPad because it’s an actual computer.
Think that’s more than I need actually – I have a MacBook Air so I don’t need a laptop. Aside from some light note taking I don’t anticipate doing more than reading and watching videos on the tablet.
My last work computer was a Surface Pro and my current one is a Surface Book. They are terrible–all sorts of weird problems with the internal power supply and the keyboard. I would never buy one for myself and tried to talk IT into letting me have a Mac because the Surface is so unreliable and I’ve been stuck with a non-functional computer on more than one business trip.
I’m a professor and don’t think tablets work well for actual assignments, but can be nice for reading and sometimes note taking (most of my students do bring laptops to class, not tablets, though I’m in STEM). I love my iPad mini because the size is so much more manageable, but I mostly use it for reading and things like checking email or web browsing. I really need a mouse and keyboard for any real work.
Thanks! Yes planning on having it for reading (I just got a new job and will have a 30 min train commute now), some note taking, watching lectures and to have as a second screen (notes/readings up on that while I do assignments in my laptop). I’ll also use it for personal use: Netflix, pull up recipes on it while I cook, fun reading, etc.
I want more functionality than a kindle, will probably get a keyboard for notes but won’t plan on using it for assignments
I love my iPad mini for pulling up documents and note taking. It’s small enough that I can easily manage it one handed but I still find that when I turn it landscape I can type on it easily.
Awesome. Will head to target or somewhere to get a better sense of the sizing!
Since it sounds like you already have a laptop I would go for an ipad to do what you describe here, but if you were starting with no device I would recommend a Microsoft Surface as a solo device that does all these things.
Thanks! Yes – I have a MacBook Air that’s only a few years old so no need for a computer.
I actually had a Surface Pro at my old job and loved it (kept my laptop docked at my desk and used the surface as a laptop in meetings, for wfh and anything offsite). I never used it as a tablet, but it was great as a stand in for a laptop. However, I think it’s more than I need for school since I have a laptop already (and I think they’re pretty pricey)
If you were to do a honeymoon in the US, where would you go?
Hawaii.
If not Hawaii, Martha’s Vineyard or Napa/Sonoma.
California. I’d go to Santa Barbara a few nights, Big Sur a few nights, and end in Napa.
I did mine in the US and it was my favorite trip of all time! We did a road trip up the Pacific Coast, starting in Los Angeles and then going all the way up to Mendocino before cutting in to go up to the Avenue of the Giants.
Itinerary was like this:
– Fly into LAX on a Monday mid-morning, pick up rental car.
– Hollywood walk of fame and lunch. Get on the road. Overnight in Santa Barbara.
– Tuesday morning in Santa Barbara, drive up to Solvang for lunch and walking around, then on to the late afternoon tour of Hearst Castle. Overnight in Cambria.
– Wednesday morning walk along Moonstone Beach and breakfast in Cambria. Day – drive through Big Sur w/ stops for hikes and views.
– Wednesday-Friday overnight in Carmel-by-the-Sea. Did 17-mile Drive, Monterrey, and just enjoying Carmel.
– Saturday-Monday overnight in San Francisco. Did Alcatraz, Sausalito, walking across the bridge, the science academy.
– Tuesday drive up coast to Mendocino & overnight in Mendocino. This town is adorable, but honestly this part of the drive terrified me and (for me) was worse than Big Sur with the drop-offs, so maybe take a less coastal route.
– Wednesday – head to The Avenue of the Giants and overnight in Garberville.
– Thursday-Saturday – overnight in Sonoma.
– Sunday fly home from SFO.
Cosign this — what a great trip!! If you want a day and night in L.A., spend the night on the beach in Santa Monica and visit the Getty Villa in Malibu.
Hawaii without question. If not Hawaii, my other suggestions depend on time of the year and what you like to do….Amangiri in Utah (super $$$), Amangani (also $$$) or other luxury resort in Jackson Hole, Santa Barbara / Santa Ynez, Big Sur, Nantucket, Aspen, Napa, Little Palm Island (Florida keys).
I’d go somewhere nature-focused on a honeymoon so you can have more time with each other (and not in crowds).
If you’re doing it soon, maybe the Finger Lakes for nicer weather, waterfalls, cute towns. Maybe coastal Maine. In cooler weather I’d probably do the southwest.
As an aside, I would definitely not do Hawai’i…. native Hawai’ians are literally begging folks to stop visiting (at least for now) https://www.euronews.com/travel/2022/05/03/hawaiian-overtourism-residents-beg-tourists-to-stop-visiting-amid-post-pandemic-boom
Sedona. Maine. Florida Keys.
We went to Asheville and stayed on the Biltmore estate.
Florida Keys.
For a summer honeymoon, San Juan Islands, WA.
This was high on our list.
Keys, Maine, Hawaii, or Puerto Rico.
Depends on the time of year, where you are from, and where you know people. We had a winter wedding and honeymoon, and, with family in FL and CA (who don’t really know how to leave us alone), we chose a very random city neither of us had been to.
Personally, the north woods of Minnesota, southern Colorado, Maine, or Big Sky country. My sister is doing the Oregon coast which also sounds lovely.
Acadia! We did our honeymoon there in October and it was so lovely and peaceful.
Alaska or Hawaii, no question. Anywhere else is perfect for a week or even a long weekend. Alaska and Hawaii are the two parts of the US where you need a week minimum and ideally two.
Is Restoration Hardware worth it for non furniture items? like pillows, throws, etc? Their stuff is so beautiful but soooo expensive.
I think it depends on the item and if you can find it elsewhere or not. We have a LOT of RH blankets/throws/pillows/mirrors/etc. and find them super luxurious plus they make designs that are hard to find elsewhere. They offer a lot of fabrics/designs that would typically only be available ‘to the trade’. I also think it’s hard to find some of the styles they offer elsewhere – there is lots of midcentury modern, modern, coastal style things at various price points. But if you like truly classic, ‘grand millenial’ style and don’t have the time or patience to hire a designer or hit up high end thrift shops it’s hard to find those things elsewhere. If there is a particular item you’re hung up on order a fabric samples or try to go to a store and feel/see it in person.
I have a throw blanket from RH that is legit awesome. Pretty, so soft, and has lasted forever. So I say yes…
What blogs do you read other than this one? I’m off social media now and finding myself wishing I had my old blog reader for wasting time on the internet. I’ve got this one, Cap Hill Style, Wardrobe Oxygen, and Zero Waste Chef in rotation, and I’d love to add others on just about any topic other than current events or depressing social problems.
I love Girls of a Certain Age and Go Fug Yourself
I forgot about Go Fug Yourself! I was a reader way back in the Bai Ling era! I’m glad to know it’s still around, and I’ll check it out.
I have also been finding myself missing my old blog reader. Not missing social media though.
I like Blue Collar Red Lipstick and Conscious By Komal. Neither of them post often but when they do they have really good content. Oh, and Looks Good From the Back, and PhD In Clothes.
I forgot about Feedly and I still have it on my phone. Thanks for the reminder!
Savage Love, Budget bytes, and a great non-English blog with layman updates on all sorts of current research (medicine, social, cultural, environmental, food…). Occasionally I get a whiff of nostalgia and pop by Aldaily.
I’ve moved to substack newsletters, which is the best thing ever.
I’m boomeranging back to my former company after 10 months at a different one. The company I’m returning to is huge but very relationship focused. I want to email my previous leadership team to give them a heads up that I’ll be coming back, but not sure what to say. I’m going back to a different team so we won’t be working together much and while everyone was very nice when I left, I departed a few months after being promoted so I could tell people were a little peeved. What’s the most tactful way to do this?
Can you pitch it as exciting the new opportunity came up so that you can rejoin the company you like? I think the fact that it’s a different focus/job is what you play up.
I recently did something similar and frankly times are so tight with talent, even if there were bad feelings, people are generally glad to have you back. I would reach out to people individually and say you’re glad to be back, things weren’t what you thought and you’re looking forward to reconnecting.
Anyone want to shop for me? Or have a formal dress they’ve been eyeing? I am finally going to an in person formal event – fundraising gala for a national big name non profit organization – and want to look good! I’m petite and often try to avoid heels. Any dress suggestions, or stores you’d recommend? I never dress up and work in healthcare so I have zero experience making fashion decisions for myself.
What’s your budget? Is the dress code black tie or c0cktail?
I’m too late to reply, but ideally under $150 and no guidelines for dress code.
This sounds like the perfect occasion for RTR.
What is the point of Guam?
???
Okay, this made me laugh. I am so curious as to what this means.
Do people still carry goyard tote bags? If not, what is a good alternative?
Looking for something new this summer as a splurgy treat.
I do. It’s my work bag. My husband got me an Euro exclusive 4 years ago and i have been carrying since. still looks great; holds a ton and is super light but sturdy.
I see it around a lot in tribeca (downtown manhattan), primarily on women who are also wearing other identifiably designer things. This morning I saw a woman wearing one with a burberry trench (lining showing in the hood) and a wheeled LV signature duffel bag.
When you think about “old money” style, what handbags come to mind?
Celine or honestly cheap-o unbranded ones.
Or LL Bean
Quality leather but with no visible brands or logos.
The oldest money woman I know carries a beat-up Madewell tote and wears no visible designer anything.
Queen Elizabeth’s Launer bags.
Old leather bag with no labels, frayed around the edges.
Battered Coach handbags (my grandmother had one from the 1960s and it looked like it had been through an auto crusher) or no-name leather cross-bodies.
Descended from Congressmen and CEOs of companies you have heard of, and I will have you know that my cobbler-repaired basic black leather Kate Spade coordinates beautifully with my 20 year old Mercedes station wagon.
High quality trendless leather purse she bought in 1996-2006 and has somehow maintained for 15-25 years.
Does anyone have a very lightweight or summer weight down alternative duvet insert to recommend? I currently have an “all season” insert and it is too warm for the summer months.
Is there a reason a light quilt isn’t an option for you?
I have a lightweight one from IKEA – it’s great and washable, which is a bonus.