Suit of the Week: Hugo Boss

180 Comments

1. Tell me something good?

   Between the post about obesity/COVID this morning and the exhaustive (yes, I know, also necessary) discussions on CMoms about school reopenning… I’m spent.

   I’ll start: I’ve been courting a prospective client for three years. Today, in a pandemic no less when ‘now is probably not a good time to find new clients’ we’re told, he’s finally hiring me for a deal. Horray. I also hopped back on the Peloton this morning for the first time in six weeks. Hoping to get back to my daily use/workout routine.

   1. I’ve lost 4 of my Covid 10 by getting my butt off the couch after work and going for a walk around my neighborhood. It’s amazing how much just my Before Times daily “not even thinking it’s exercise” walking (around the office, to lunch, etc) mattered to my metabolism!

      1. Um…OP implied she was unhappy about that horrendous obesity post this morning and your good thing to report is about weight loss? To each their own, but was this the right place for that?

         1. oh lord. Sorry.

         2. OP also posted about getting back to. Her peloton…

            1. I think drinking some Aviation gin is the solution to that

            2. In case you missed the point that was made repeatedly this morning, you cannot tell whether someone exercises regularly or enjoys exercise by observing their body size.

            3. I bought Aviation gin specifically because of that ad. It’s delicious.

            4. Ribena: same. I’m sad my bottle is all gone (no idea how that happened!)

      2. Congratulations!

      3. I’ve posted this before but I didn’t realize how much the little movements added up until I broke my foot and was in a boot and only able to walk the stairs in my house/office once per day. I basically was always either in my office chair, on my couch or in my bed for several months. While I had a “walking” boot, I wasn’t really supposed to walk in it more than necessary. I gained 10 pounds and I’m not even someone who regularly exercised either. The fetch with the dogs and getting the mail and running to the water cooler for the 10th time all add up!

   2. I started taking an outdoor yoga class once a week after working out at home a lot through the spring and I am loving it.

   3. We just closed on a second home that I absolutely love in the mountains about 90 miles from our primary home. So my weekends will hopefully be amazing for the rest of the summer — after we get furniture that is!

      1. Sweet! You are living the dream.

   4. I’m taking a short-term sabbatical from work to cover childcare until our new nanny is able to start and was very nervous about the impact on my career/would my team think I was a slacker/etc. My boss not only told me outright that she 100% supports me taking the time, but that she was also assigning me to a big high profile new project!
      Oh – and we seemingly found the unicorn part-time nanny who is just coming off 15 years working for another family and we are SO relieved. Woo!

   5. Since covid hit, my dad facetimes my niece and nephew who live in across the country every day to work on math and chinese. I think it’s such a cute way for my dad to catch up with his grandkids, and to keep the kids occupied for my brother & SIL during this time.
      Also my grandma-in-law called me Monday night to let me know Talbots has a sale on dresses because she knows I like them. I didn’t end up getting any, but was very touched she thought of me.
      Oh, and my jalapeno plant is sprouting it’s first jalapeno!

      1. That is SO cute of your dad.

      2. My dad would maybe do this, but he is hard of hearing and also tends to go off the math deep end (phd in engineering). I think if my kids did a week of Extended Math Musings With Gramps (topic a, let me show you how easy the slide rule is), they would gladly STFU and do the math I ask them to do.

         I love my dad. I love that he is am optimist about teaching girls All The Things About Math. But OMG he is such an engineer!

         1. I’m having flashbacks of my engineer father “helping” me with my math homework in elementary and middle school.

            1. Flashbacks here too – my engineer father “helping” me with my math homework in elementary and middle school left me in tears and frustrated.

            2. Another daughter of an engineer dad here! OMG the calculus-induced tears lol

      3. My dad does this! (Well not the Chinese…) My 7 year old is… learning algebra?!

   6. I’m doing important research into the proper microwave settings for making s’mores. So far I’ve been microwaving the chocolate first and then adding the marshmallow and microwaving for another short period. I think I should microwave the marshmallow first and allow the the heat to melt the chocolate. Will report back with my findings.

      1. i prefer to toast marshmallow in toaster oven

      2. My preferred approach is microwave marshmallow, then place the marshmallow on the chocolate. The heat from the marshmallow melts the chocolate the perfect amount.

         Alternatively, wrap the s’more in foil and place in the oven at 450 for 5-10 minutes.

      3. I use the low broiler setting in my oven. Place marshmallows on aluminum foil and sort of scoop them off with a spoon onto the graham cracker/chocolate. The scooping part takes a little finesse but is doable. You just have to watch them like a hawk, but it’s worth it to get that nice golden brown toastiness that you can’t get from the microwave. I do this…a lot.

         When I’m feeling too impatient/lazy to use the broiler I use anonymous at 2:58’s microwave method.

      4. We have held weekly smores sessions by toasting marshmallows over a can of sterno. Delightfully crusty exterior. :)

      5. Thanks for the other suggestions! Toaster oven sounds like a good idea too

      6. If you have a gas stove you can melt marshmallows directly over one of the burner flames. (I have never tried this because I’m terrified of fire but my friends say it works well)

         1. I have toasted marshmallows over a candle.

      7. If you have a gas burner you can toast the marshmallow on it. Please report back on chocolate results though.

      8. I recommend using other items in place of chocolate. Swipe of Nutella. Reese’s PB cup. Etc.

   7. My complicated tomato staking process failed yesterday when my husband accidentally broke the wire holding up the strings (long story on both the staking and string training.) One of the larger branches of my best tomato plant got bent in half and the leaves were wilting. The branch was dying. It has a lot of beautiful but unripe tomatoes on it. I was upset.

      So I went all garden Girl Scout and built a splint for the branch out of some string and a popsicle stick. I had no idea what I was doing and was just making it up as I went along. This morning the leaves are un-wilted and healthy looking. Fingers crossed, but I can’t help feeling like some combination of little house on the prairie and limb reattachment surgeon.

      1. *Immediately adding “Garden Girl Scout” to my vocabulary.

         1. I figured my accomplishment was so esoteric no one would get it. I’m glad you got some new vocab out of it! :)

      2. And have a recipe for fried green tomatoes on hand for the next time…

         1. they go in my chili! But also great job on the plant rescue!

         2. I love green fried tomatoes – my dad was from the south and we grew up on them. That was the plan if the splint didn’t work!

   8. I’ve posted here about my attempt to apply to grad school and the weird things that happened re transcripts, but the other day my advisor just emailed me out of the blue to say everything was resolved and my application was complete!

   9. Vegetables from my garden! Have never successfully had one before, but am really enjoying the lettuce, cucumbers and am zucchini that have grown. Made zucchini bread and trying to figure out what else to make with the other zillion.

      1. I recently made the chocolate zucchini cake from Mel’s Kitchen Cafe. It was super easy and yummy. There’s also a recipe on the site for sauteed chicken with mushrooms and zucchini.

      2. I like to make zucchini fritters by shredding it and mixing with an egg and some bread crumbs and then frying. Or zucchini noodles in place of spaghetti!

      3. Saveur has a delicious zucchini and tomato and rice gratin recipe. It’s a bit of work, but totally worth it!

         1. All excellent suggestions-thanks!

   10. I found hand sanitizer at the market!

   11. Our dahlias are blooming and I think my son is very, very close to walking.

   12. I was afraid I had broken my pinkie toe in an argument with a chair leg, but it’s been three weeks and it seems to be good as new so apparently it was just a bad bruise. Yay!

   13. We have a tentative offer on our old house, with the idea that we could close in 4 to 5 weeks. It will be a relief to not have two mortgages. The buyer was thinking he would flip it, but his wife and sons fell in love with the pool. *fingers crossed*

       I have been visiting the local farmers market in our new town. It’s so much fun! I have always liked the one in our old town, but I am enjoying access to local wineries, something not allowed at the old one.

       We are starting to meet our new neighbors. They have driveway social times on Saturday evenings when the weather allows. We are about the youngest in the group (48 & 53), and the only ones who aren’t retired. It’s interesting to hear from everyone.

   14. My day lilies are alive! They were transplanted from my mother’s garden, who transplanted them from her mother’s garden.

   15. I bought a Cuisinart ice cream maker (in Tiffany blue/light aqua!) and I’ve been working on perfecting mint stracciatella ice cream. Made my first batch this week (extract over fresh mint this time and semisweet chips over dark chocolate) but looking forward to trying other recipes. I thought I had botched this one – thought I had essentially scrambled the eggs, but it turned out great after I ran it through a sieve and left it in the fridge overnight. It’s a silly thing, but we’re having fun with it. I’ve also been experimenting with making spicy deviled eggs after we had them with brunch about a month ago. I feel like I’ve gotten it down!

2. I’m “Evie”, the poster behind a Corporette money snapshot.

   I just saw that my submission was published.. I don’t even remember when I sent it in! Now that we’re firmly into 2020, I’ll give an update on how my finances and life have changed as a result of Covid. First, the obligatory acknowledgement that we’re extremely fortunate compared to many. But this is an anonymous forum so I’m going to word vomit some honest feelings even at the risk of sound obnoxious.

   Fortunately, COVID hasn’t negatively affected our finances too much, yet. Our HHI remains intact, for now. We even benefited because we refi’ed due to the low rates and monthly mortgage payment decreased by $1K. I also started a new job with an after-tax / in-plan Roth conversion option for 401K. This year husband and I are on track to save $19K+19K+$25K for retirement. Our net worth is now ~$1.2M largely due to stock market growth and paying down the mortgage.

   And yet in midst of all the privilege and blessings, I find myself mucking about in morass of the blahs. Before COVID, husband and I dealt with stress by going to gym (him) or plan vacations and get dinner with friends (me). We traveled internationally multiple times a year, frequently with our elderly parents. Not having trips that I can look forward to has hit me way harder than expected. Now, we’re both short with each other; I’ve been quicker to snap. He’s frequently the target of my misplaced anger. I’m not proud of this.

   Also, while I still enjoy living in SF, I vacillate between wishing we stretched to buy a house in a nicer part of SF and wishing that we didn’t buy anything at all. I struggle with feeling like I’m not successful enough, feelings that are compounded when I see a SFH selling for over $2M. Even with Covid and all the “demise of the city” articles I’m reading.

   I know things can be worse. Husband is worried about a lay-off. I’m worried about everything. Most days, I work, I walk the dog, and I eat my feelings.

   1. Hey! Thanks for the update and a dive into how your are really feeling. I have a couple of thoughts and will put them out there hoping that it helps or gives a different perspective for you to consider:
      1. It sounds like both you and your husband are wildly successfully when it comes to money management and I applaud you! You are saving for retirement. You have the ability to save for retirement and are taking full advantage of it. It’s a marathon, and COVID is definitely a rough patch, but you are positioning yourself for continued success in the future by sticking to your savings plan. I think I heard it on this site: you can’t out earn bad spending habits. So you’re very possibly way ahead of the game.
      2. I know I need to do this when I got into the doldrums about my particular financial situation: remind myself that success is more a long term game than a title at work. Success may be as simple as making enough money to live a life seeing friends and family, putting away some for the future, and covering your expenses. Screw the Joneses’, etc. Live your life and define success as it makes sense for you. Easier said than done *looks at self*
      3. I think the people that fill out the money questionnaire are far more interested in their financial situation than most of the readers. Most of the money profiles posted on this site are actively involved in growing their retirement accounts, getting out of debt, keeping their expenses low – one or more of the many aspects of personal finance. As such I think it’s possible that this group is of submitters would naturally feel even more of the uncertainty for the future, or the stress of seeing COVID affect their plans, than those who aren’t as in to planning, or who don’t ( yet or otherwise) have plans. Another way to put it is that the money anxiety you feel may be due to that fact that making/saving/growing money is something you’re focusing on more than average. The good news here is that you are already practicing money management such that you can and will adapt, overcome, etc the particular set backs or uncertainties that COVID brings. You may be in a better position to relax and roll with all these punches. That may help when the anxiety rears up.
      4. I’m so glad you submitted to the money questionnaire. I’ve been meaning to, as I would like to discuss rentals with the readership. So thank you for the look into your financial life and also the look into how you are feeling during these uncertain times.
      5. No one knows the right answer – for housing, for businesses re-opening, for school, for work, for COVID life in general. There’s a TON of unknowns to deal with and as such the ‘right’ answer is elusive. I certainly am not used to dealing with so many unknowns. The best any one can do is pick a path and move forward. Don’t make perfect the enemy of the good. Your house may not feel ideal right now, but in the future that may change. It sounds like you already made a great decision by refinancing.
      6. I hope that you can find some alternative type of stress relief during this time. I get it, it’s hard, especially if travel and getting away is your jam. If not, please know you aren’t the only one eating your feelings. Welcome to that club!

   2. Man, your last sentence is me, too.

3. General temp check for the group – would you do a routine dental cleaning right now? My original appointment was in May and has been rescheduled for 7/31. I’m not a high-risk person but cases are rising here. Would you go?

   1. I was supposed to go in late March and still haven’t gone in. I’ve only ever had one cavity in my life, so I feel like it isn’t much risk to me if I wait 12 months between cleanings rather than 6. I would hold off if you have generally healthy teeth, especially because cases are rising in your area.

   2. I would, because as bad as it might be right now, I think it’s likely to keep getting worse from here, not better.

      1. I went last week for this reason. It was completely empty of other patients and I got hit with a $20 PPE charge, but cases are low in my area right now so I’d rather get the visit in while things are safe vs wait a year and have a cavity.

   3. Yes, and am going tomorrow. Dentist office is taking mega precautions.

   4. I went about a month ago (so- clearly didn’t catch it from the dentist at this point).
      – If things close down again, didn’t want to go a year between cleanings & check.
      – My dentist is following detailed protocols with temperature checks and questioning each patient before checking them in. No one in the waiting room, everyone outside.
      – Hygienists were wearing two masks and a face shield and full body plastic.
      – They did not use the spray-gun for plaque work, only the metal tools. While I therefore spent my visit feeling like nails on a chalkboard in my mouth, it’s so much better for keeping spit out of the air that I had no issue.

   5. In IL (where cases have risen in the last month but not as drastically as elsewhere) – I plan to go for a routine cleaning in August unless things get a lot worse. I had to go to the dentist to deal with an urgent issue in late May and felt safe based on the precautions being taken. The waiting room procedures were different (cap on number of people, having to affirm no symptoms, temperature, mask required until dentist got to my chair, etc.) but the exam itself felt pretty similar to pre-COVID, just with maybe 1 additional layer of PPE on the dentist.

   6. Yes. I’m in Massachusetts and things are about as under control here right now as anywhere. I don’t see it getting better than this before we have a vaccine and I’m not about to wait more than 12 months without a routine cleaning. I have a bad history of easily getting cavities, so I’d rather do a quick in/out 15 minute cleaning now then have to sit in a chair in 6 months for 1-2 fillings. I also know doctors in general are taking serious precautions and I like/trust my long-time dentist is doing the same.

   7. I’m holding off. It doesn’t mean much to me that dentists are checking for symptoms when mounting evidence shows that asymptomatic transmission is the biggest driver of community spread.

   8. I went a few weeks ago, in area where cases are rising but not terrible. I’d moved recently and had taken a while to find a new dentist and then my initial appointment in March got postponed, so it had been 14 months since my last appointment. I figured it would be at least 6 more months if not another year or two before things are really all that much better, so at this point I should just go. I got the first appointment in the morning, patients weren’t allowed to wait inside, everyone’s wearing extra PPE, cleanings are hand tools only to reduce aerosols, and they have air filters all over the place. If I had been more recently or was in a higher risk category or a real hot spot area, I might have waited, but for me it seemed like a reasonable risk and I’m not literally not going anywhere else except medical appointments right now.

   9. Yes, I have been in for a cleaning and then went back for a mouthgaurd fitting. I felt very safe, everyone was masked and or PPE’d up, they took everyone’s temperature coming in and there was maybe one other person in the waiting room very far apart from me.

      1. I think temperature checks are giving a false sense of security. They don’t catch asymptomatic transmission or the significant minority of symptomatic people who don’t have fever in the early stages (or the later ones, for that mater).

         1. I don’t disagree, but at least it weeds out the clearly symptomatic folks who refuse to believe they may have the virus (or be sick generally).

         2. Agree with this. Plus, most of the forehead thermometers aren’t well calibrated or used correctly. Every time mine is measured it’s well below 98- when I went to the dentist, it was 94! I think temperature measurements are just security theater and asking about symptoms is only slightly better (I have bad allergies and chronic migraine so have most of the symptoms every day). I would much rather just see rigorous enforcement of masking and distancing, though obviously you shouldn’t go to the dentist if you think you’re feeling at all sick or running a fever.

   10. I’m going. My grown daughter delayed and needed a root canal (so 6 appointments instead of 1-2). The dentist’s precautions were excellent. Depends on your area – in a current hotspot I might delay a little more. Our area was a hotspot in March-April and doing better now.

   11. I am in MA and went the first week they were allowed to open (luckily coincided with a previously-scheduled appointment), around mid-June. I was a little nervous, but decided to do it because if I skipped, it was possible, and maybe likely, that by the time cleaning became more urgent, there would be a second wave. I had to wait outside and was texted to enter, where I was temp checked by someone behind a plexiglass wall. Then I walked myself to a room and after I was sitting a fully covered tech came in. She was the only person I saw, and they used manual metal tools only. They also were cleaning the rooms extensively between uses, with pre-defined gaps between patients in a given room. I would do it again based on my experience.

   12. I cancelled mine last week. Cases are out of control in my county, so it just didn’t feel worth the risk. I plan to reschedule it as soon as our numbers come down a bit.

   13. Yes.

   14. I cancelled mine but I’ve always fortunately had healthy teeth and gums. My husband is the lots of cavities type so he went. He felt very comfortable with their precautions. I think it’s a personal risk assessment thing.

       That said, I just made an optometrist appointment. Seeing is important and I can’t put it off any longer.

   15. I would hold off, personally (though I’d go to the dentist if I had pain / problem). I think if there’s an occasional year where you only have one cleaning, it’s not the end of the world.

   16. Yes. I am 0% worried about Covid. I figure we are mostly going to get it anyway, so I might as well get it over with if I have not had it already. If the dentist and his hygienists and staff are willing to work, I am willing to support them.

   17. Thanks everyone! I appreciate your input. I have troublesome teeth so I will probably go.

   18. My 6 month cleaning was in May, and it was canceled. I’m in MA. Never had a cavity. My dentist has not called to reschedule. Perhaps I should call and see if he is open now, but I do admit that I have anxiety about going.

   19. piggybacking…what if you were 7+ months pregnant? I’m thinking of postponing…

       1. I wouldn’t postpone in that case, unless I were in a real hot spot. The dentist I visit is taking excellent precautions (I had a long delayed filling done 2 weeks ago). When I was pregnant my dentist had me come in more frequently because pregnant women often have gum problems (hormones I guess?). Also, it’s much easier to go now than in a newborn…

       2. I’m 5 months pregnant and have the same question! I’m already 4 months late (was scheduled right around when shutdowns started)

          1. In Chicago and 8 weeks pregnant. I was due for a cleaning in April and by the time the office opened up, I was pregnant. My ob recommended waiting until after the first trimester but acknowledged that we should re-assess when it comes to see if it’s worth holding off for longer because of case numbers or trying to go. My dentist has been updating with the precautions they are taking and are generally a very new-tech practice, so I think when the time comes, I will try to go first appointment, not take public transportation in, etc.

       3. I went in a month ago for a regular cleaning around 7 months. My OB had advised postponing in mid-March, but when I asked about the rescheduled appt, she said it was my choice but that dental health was important for pregnant women. My dentist was very proactive about making changes in the office and getting enough PPE (to the point where they advised me to dress warmly for my appt because they’d lowered the temperature in the office to keep staff comfortable while they were wearing all their PPE). I felt very comfortable with the precautions they were taking, and I was the first appt of the day. At that point, cases in my county were still relatively flat…not sure I’d make the same decision now that cases are skyrocketing.

       4. I cancelled mine at my doctor’s recommendation – also pregnant.

       5. I went six weeks ago at about 6 months pregnant – I had been having some mouth bleeding while brushing and was overdue for my cleaning, so I decided to go. I’m glad i did, my dentist put my mind at ease and the bleeding has been reduced considerably. I am in CA so a hotspot state, but my city itself has been relatively spared. Everyone had PPE, my temp was checked at the door and I was given gloves and wore a mask at all times when the hygienist/dentist wasn’t actively working in my mouth.

   20. I would. I had a cleaning in June and so did each of my kids. Now my dentist is an old friend who is absolutely meticulous about hygiene, but I think dentists as a rule are pretty on top of the requirements right now.

   21. I went for my regularly scheduled appointment in June. Discussed risk with the dude (since we’re both exposed if one of us is) and decided a) dentists are learning everything new about the extra care that they have to take right now, just so they can be open, and b) since they are wearing full-on PPE and I’m not, they are actually more at risk from me than I am from them. My hygienist was wearing a mask and a shield and gloves and a gown. I felt very safe.

   22. I would decide partially based on how your dentist office is laid out. Mine is set up with sort of open air cubbies – the storage cabinets block off “rooms” but it’s pretty open air. I had to go for dental work that was causing me pain, but as I was listening to the person in the next cubby telling the hygienist about her summer jobs working at a restaurant and a grocery store I was so freaked out. They were running air purifiers and she was down wind of me, but I hated it. If your dentist has proper rooms I guess I would feel a little more comfortable.

   23. I’m immune compromised but don’t want to risk going a year without a cleaning. My understanding is that the risk is from other patients’ germs being in the air or areosolizing without masks. I called and asked for the earliest time – got a 7am appointment in late August. The germs in the air from the day before shouldn’t be in the air. I’ll be the only patient in the office. Hopefully we won’t shut down by then.

   24. I went for dental cleaning in late June (when COVID was low in my area) and they found 3 cavities (which is unusual for me), which my dentist fixed next day. I wore mask the whole time until i entered the dental office – the dentist and nurse were wearing masks (as usual). They asked my to use antibacterial mouthwash first and only then we followed with the normal routine. In my low-risk area, I would have zero hesitation to go again if needed.

4. A friend of a friend (whom I’ve met once briefly at a party) works at a place where I’m about to apply for a job. My friend said she’ll put me in touch with this guy to talk before I submit my application, but I’m wondering what kinds of helpful questions you could actually ask in such a situation. Culture? I don’t want to waste his time…

   1. Forgot to mention that he does not work in the subject area that I’d be applying in but it’s possible he works with them.

   2. I did this prior to getting my current job, except I hadn’t met the friend of a friend before and he transferred to a different city. I asked favorite and least favorite thing about working there, what I can expect for the next 3-5 years in the role & team. I was very concerned about team culture, and felt like his opinion would be truthful. You could ask how things have been going with covid, how the company has responded, benefits, etc.

      1. Thanks, Covid is a great one to bring up…

   3. I’ve done this before and have just straight out asked if the person knows what the company generally looks for when hiring new people. If the person is involved in the same department, I’ll ask more specifically what it seems like they’re looking for in the specific role. That way I can tailor my cover letter and resume to the extent possible. He knows you’re calling because you’re applying to work there, so the fact that you want the job and want to know what they’re looking for is a perfectly legit question in my view.

5. Anyone here in NYC want to speculate what will happen this fall/winter with regard to the virus? Obviously no one knows for sure, but I’m curious to hear opinions…

   1. I don’t live in NYC, but have a concern that affects anywhere with a cold climate. What’s with all these recommendations to hold gatherings (including school) outside or with open windows and lots of ventilation? That’s not possible for half the calendar year, at best, where I live due to the cold.

      The expectation that cases will rise in cold weather is, I think, due to the expectation that people will inevitably start congregating more indoors. So even if it’s just social gatherings, I do anticipate this.

      1. I share this concern… even in an area that is taking the virus seriously and mask-wearing is pretty ubiquitous at this point.

      2. Ha, here in Texas we’re blaming the outbreaks on the heat and the fact that we congregate indoors with the air conditioning. It would probably make more sense to blame it on our early re-opening, our late mask-order, and our refusal to close down anything again.

         1. I’m sure that’s all true! But you raise a good point: wide open windows or outdoor events just aren’t realistic much of the time in many places, due to the need for either heat OR air conditioning. Suddenly expecting things to be run without climate control opens up a whole new set of health risks for vulnerable people, in addition to being distractingly cold/hot for everyone.

   2. I don’t live in NYC; however, If I take a ride in my head into the future it begins to give me anxiety (not as bad as in the beginning of all this though). I think we need to wait and see. If it helps, I am far more optimistic about treatment insights now. I have also resigned myself to a stance of “this will keep changing” and all my worrying will not benefit it one whit. Uggh.

   3. No

   4. So much depends on what happens w/r/t schools reopening. I think in general, New Yorkers continue to take covid seriously, even though there are pockets of partiers and anti-maskers. It looks as though schools won’t be back in person full-time, and the rest is TBD. If that’s the case, most employers will have to continue to support WFH, which keeps us pretty much in the same place we are now. Which sucks personally, but is helping control the spread.

   5. NYCer here and I’m very curious, too. Most people I know still don’t have their offices open or are strictly voluntary. I’m not sure offices will really be back until after next flu season at the earliest, but even then, who knows. For one thing, with social distancing requirements in elevators, I feel like the amount of time that will be wasted waiting for elevators will be insane. In Before Times I’d sometimes have to wait 10 minutes for an elevator, and that was when we could pack 20 people in! Not sure how that will work when capacity is limited to 4 or 6 or whatever. Also, it’s not like most lobbies are large enough to let people wait there and I can’t really imagine companies telling workers they have to wait 20+ minutes outside in the winter every day to catch an elevator….

   6. NYC and my organization says we likely won’t be back in office until next calendar year. Org with a major bias against remote work previously.

6. This is by far my fav color for a suit. I always feel outstanding and brash in it!

   1. Same! This is a gorgeous color.

7. In IL (where cases have risen in the last month but not as drastically as elsewhere) – I plan to go for a routine cleaning in August unless things get a lot worse. I had to go to the dentist to deal with an urgent issue in late May and felt safe based on the precautions being taken. The waiting room procedures were different (cap on number of people, having to affirm no symptoms, temperature, mask required until dentist got to my chair, etc.) but the exam itself felt pretty similar to pre-COVID, just with maybe 1 additional layer of PPE on the dentist.

   1. Darnit – double post.

8. Does anyone have any good recommendations for reading on when to refinance a mortgage? 5 years into a 30-year fixed at 3.875; wondering if/when it will make sense to refinance. (Maybe to a 15-year? Not sure.) Credit Karma tells me my credit is 800+.

   1. You refinance when it makes financial sense. I don’t know what rates are today, but call up your bank and ask about today’s rates and what fees you’d have to pay for the refi.

   2. Depends on a lot of things– how long you’re staying in your house, do you anticipate needing a HELOC soon, etc. We had a similar rate and recently refinanced in order to get rid of PMI. We were 4 years into a 30 year fixed. Our house had increased so much in value that we were able to get rid of PMI and switch to a 20 years fixed with the same monthly payment. (When rates were higher a few months ago, the numbers did not work out as well for us.)

   3. Absolutely do it! We’re refinancing into 2.99%! If you don’t want to re-set the clock you can always calculate what the payment would be on a 25-year loan and pay that amount.

      1. Assuming you are planning to stay put for a while.

   4. Now. I’m about to close a 3.0%, 30-year fixed jumbo loan. We were only one year in to the 3.85%, 30-year we placed on our house when we bought it in June 2019. If we were conforming/not jumbo, we could probably get in the high 2s (my sister just got 2.75% for the same product, fully conforming), but I didn’t feel like paying down the mortgage to that level right now given economic uncertainties and wanting to have an outsized emergency fund for the forseeable future. The cost to refi is earned back in our savings on interest in under two years (closer to a year if I remember correctly) so 100% worth it.

   5. I closed yesterday on a 2.65% 15 year. We were already in a 15, but at a slightly higher rate. We’re saving about $600 a month, which means that in a year we will see the savings based on the cost to close (about $6500). We were willing to commit to being in the property at least another 4-5 years and wanted to lock in as low as we could, given the uncertainty of the market.

   6. We had no idea so we just called the mortgage lender and got our numbers. For us, it didn’t make sense. We are not in our forever home and it would take about five years to recoup the closing costs that would be added to our mortgage. We are in a city with high property transfer taxes. I have placed a call to our credit union to see if they have better options but things are really delayed with the high volume.

   7. Depends what your end goal is. you can probably get a better rate, even on a 30 year, or you could move into a 15 or 20 year and your monthly payment will go up. For context, I am currently ~5 years into a 30 at around 4%, and we are in the process of refinancing into a 3% 20 year that will be very close to the same monthly cost as our current mortgage.

   8. I am no financial whiz, to be sure, but I was able to bring my monthly payment down to cover the increase in my student loan payment from refinancing those and drop my mortgage nterest rate 1.25%. I am a year into a 30-year fixed at 4.25 and got down to a 3% 30-year fixed. I stayed with a 30 year because I was more concerned about the monthly payment than the length of the mortgage (and while I have no plans to leave soon, doubt I will be there forever). I am reducing the term of my student loans by 10 years (assuming I don’t pay extra) so an additional year to my mortgage with a lower interest rate seemed like an okay tradeoff. I could have gotten 2% for a 15 year, with only a slightly higher payment, but I am reducing my student loan interest by over 2%, so I think it’s all going to work out positively for me in the end?

   9. we’re a few years into a 20 year at 3.75 and just re-fied to a 20 year at 2.75. we were quote 2.9 for 30 and 2.5 for 15 year. it DEFINITELY made financial sense for us (payback period is about a year) since we’re planning to be in this house a few more years at the minimum and our monthly payments went down 300$

   10. We are 5 years into a 30 year with a 5-year ARM (so the ARM expiring forced us to look at rates. Good thing, bc we are now refinancing to a 20-year fixed at a lower rate. Our monthly PITI is only going up a couple hundred/month and we cut 5 years off the loan!

   11. Who is everyone using to get these great rates? I called Wells Fargo and USAA and didn’t get anywhere close. Navy Fed Credit Union does but is adding .75% to the rate b/c they are so backlogged. Welcome suggestions if anyone got a great rate and fairly pain-free refi.

9. Hopefully a fun “who is right” poll here between my mother and I!

   My mother and I both have dogs that we walk for them to do their business. We were talking today about proper etiquette for number twos. We are both firmly on ALWAYS PICK UP. However….

   – One of us will throw away the bag in whatever trash can we see that is on the street. Business dumpsters, residential cans that are on the street, public trash cans, etc.

   – The other said that was rude and that they take the bag home to throw away in their personal trash can and that it was rude to use public or others trash can.

   What say you??

   1. I don’t think it matters. What does matter is the incredibly high number of people who don’t pick it up at all or who bag it and leave it on the side of the road or trail “to get later.” OK great, thanks for spoiling the scenery for everyone else in the meantime (and let’s be real, most people forget to grab it later anyway). I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen sun-bleached plastic bags of sh*t fouling up the trail system in my town.

   2. private trash can – only if it’s on the curb for imminent garbage service. otherwise rude – that’s someone’s home and now they have to smell your dog’s poop wafting from their can??

      business trash can – please not the kind designed for people to use as they are walking into the building (same reason as above); dumpster in an alley? go for it

      public trash can – fair game as they are emptied routinely

      1. +1

         And DH and I have this exact issue of take home to throw away vs. any trash can available. He is more than willing to walk ONTO someone’s property to use their trash can — which horrifies me!

      2. +1

   3. I would take it home unless you know that the trash is about to get picked up. I’d be much less likely to put it in a residential garbage can.

   4. Public trash can, fine. Other homes/private business trash cans, nope, I would save it until I got home.

      1. This.

         1. +1

   5. I won’t throw it away in a residential can unless it’s the night before garbage pickup day, as opposed to an empty trashcan left out. I will throw it away in a public or business can/dumpster. DH would throw it in an empty trashcan left out.

      1. Even if it’s left out for pickup, the small bag sometimes falls to the bottom and the collectors miss it. Just avoid this. If you would take it home otherwise, you can take it home another time.

         1. Our cans are mechanically dumped – an arm grabs the can and turns it upside down into the truck – so I don’t see how it could be “missed”?

            1. It can get stuck in the divot where the wheel well is. Yuck.

   6. Business dumpsters, business trash cans, and public trash cans are fair game, but I don’t throw in somebody’s personal trash cans.

   7. I wouldn’t want someone throwing their dog waste in my residential trash can that sits at the end of my driveway. I can’t quite articulate why. I have cats and put all the litter box trash in there, but if for some reason I was carrying a bag down the sidewalk I wouldn’t use someone else’s trash can.

      Business dumpsters or public trash cans seem okay since there is already communal trash in there.

   8. Never in a neighbor’s can, ever. Lots of people do it but it’s not ok.

      1. +1. I’ve been tempted (how can a small dog manage 3 poops in a single walk??) but I always take it back to my own can.

      2. +1 Also, never in a neighbor’s recycling bin!!! That one reaalllly gets my goat.

      3. +1. It drives me crazy when people throw it in my trash can- it often gets stuck at the bottom and smells for weeks.

   9. Someone threw their bagged dog poop into my residential (single family home) trash can and I was disgusted. It smelled terrible and I don’t have dogs for a reason (largely, not wanting to deal with their poop, as strange as that may sound.) Obviously better than letting dog poop on my lawn, but please don’t leave it in my trash.

      1. This probably doesn’t apply for the OP, or else she would have mentioned it, but: in my city, no residential trash is picked up at all unless it’s in a specific city-issued trash bag in a specific color. So if someone threw their dog poop in my trash bin, it wouldn’t even be taken away with the trash unless this person actually untied my city trash bag and slipped the dog poop inside of it. Otherwise, the poop alone would still be sitting in my bin when I brought it back from the curb, and I would not be pleased.

         Regardless, I agree – no residential trash bins.

      2. One more thought-with Covid, I especially wouldn’t want someone touching/throwing their trash in my residential trash can. I wouldn’t go ballistic on someone if they did, but would strongly prefer that they not do so.

         1. …why? It’s trash. I assume you aren’t digging through your trash so I don’t see the effect of Covid on this…?

            1. I will be handling my trash barrel to pull it back after it’s emptied. Idk-aware that risk is very low of contracting Covid from surfaces, and am not usually germphobic but would just like people to not be handling my belongings if it can be avoided.

   10. Don’t put it in someone else’s trash can. Those baggies can and do burst, and no one wants to be the one hosing your dog’s poop out of their trash can.

       1. I love hosing poop out of my trash can!

          1. Cool. Come on over to my house.

       2. I can honestly say I have never once hosed out an outdoor trash can in my 15+ years of owning houses. I guess it makes sense that people do it, but it has never crossed my mind! The lid is closed and outside, I never smell it.

          1. there is a service in my city that will come wash your dumpster for $15. I’m so confused by it, but people love it after getting it done! who knew!

          2. A lot of people keep trash cans in their garages. Then the garage stinks, and then your car stinks.

   11. I personally think it’s fine to throw it away in a dumpster or can that’s on the street.

   12. Outdoor business trash, dumpster and public cans, absolutely. For private residential, only if it is pre-trash pick up, not after it has been picked up where it would have to sit another week.

   13. It’s a “know your ‘hood” question. In my neighborhood, if a bin is out at the road, it’s fair game. You would never walk up to one that’s pulled back next to the house, though.

   14. No, never in someone’s private trash can! I wouldn’t throw it away in a business’s either. So rude. I do not want your dog’s stinky poo anywhere near my house. It’s never as discreet as you think it is …

   15. our dumpsters are always on the street because of how our driveway sits at the end of where the ally used to be, behind our house. anyway, I am proud to provide an accessible dumpster for all the dog walkers on our street so that they don’t have to carry it home. At least they are picking it up in the first place. My only annoyance is people that put it, and other trash, into our recycle bin that has a bright yellow lid that says recycling.

   16. A couple of weeks ago someone put their dog’s poop in my trash bin right as I was backing out of my garage. First of all, it is disgusting. Second, this is my trash bin, and I don’t see any reason why this person could not carry his dog’s poop to his own trash bin or one of the public trash bins in the nearby park, where he was obviously heading to anyway. Having a dog does not somehow magically give one the right to use other people’s trash cans, even if it’s the night before pick up. Sometimes poop bags stick to the walls. Sometimes people don’t tie them up properly and everything leaks. And there’s also covid, so I don’t want anybody touching anything of mine, period.

10. Can anyone who decided NOT to go ahead with a kitchen remodel weigh in? I was looking into it but I found out there’s no way to widen my current 12′ wide space (part of which is only 10.5′). I can lengthen it from 18′ to 24′ with an expansion, but because the house is brick faced, I’m concerned the exterior expansion will be an eyesore. I then realized I can do a full cosmetic refresh and change up a couple of appliances for under $20K, rather than $100K. Is it crazy not to go ahead with the remodel, which I have long since planned to do?

    1. Have you been into a kitchen design center recently (obviously, before all of this). The amount of storage/ingenious tricks/built ins they have now for kitchens are truly are amazing. I walked out of one actively MAD at how badly our contractor designed kitchen was laid out. I’d strongly suggest working with a dedicated kitchen designer to see if you can use the space (and better designed cabinets!) to meet your needs in the same footprint.
       So, long story short, no, I don’t think you’re crazy. We were supposed to do a gut kitchen/mudroom/half bath reno this spring and stopped right before demo when the pandemic happened, but we also decided to work with our existing footprint rather than expanding. For what we would have gotten in extra square footage the cost didn’t make sense. We also talked to our original realtor who (very nicely!) informed us that we have a ‘high end starter house’ for our area, and that unless the reno added on another 1,000 sq feet or more, we wouldn’t recoup the cost. Couldn’t hurt to ask around in Houzz or another design forum too!

    2. If it’s more expensive and you think it might be an eyesore, why go ahead with it? I recently opted out of my remodel plans because the main thing I wanted (expanding the pantry) wasn’t possible so I just painted the cabinets and replaced the backsplash. Saved some money and it still feels like new.

    3. I have twice remodeled kitchens (first house and current house) without changing the footprint, after giving careful consideration to doing that and almmmost pulling the trigger.

       In the case of my first house, I wanted to replace the cabinets and counters – they were both that ugly 1980s white laminate with oak trim, what my contractor neighbor at the time called the “Home Depot special” (more on that later) and when I thought about doing all of that, I thought the stove would be better in a different location, and the adjoining kitchen nook we were using as a home office would make a better pantry space. But then my contractor neighbor told me the cabinets were structurally very sound, so we ended up doing a “reface” – new solid cherry doors and trim, new counters, floors refinished, and fresh paint. It made a world of difference and was a huge selling point when we moved.

       In my current house, I did add additional counter space and had the dishwasher built in (we started with one of those hilarious rolling dishwashers). In this case we got all new cabinets – yes, from Home Depot! They’ve come a long way – new counters, had the floor refinished, new paint, new electric, new gas lines, new sink, new appliances. Even a new window – a replacement window, not a new hole in the wall.

       But other than we still didn’t change any walls. We did have low soffits for some reason, so we opened those up, but that’s not really a structural change. The additional counter space was along a blank wall where the prior owners had put a table – it didn’t make any sense and was just asking to be a long counter space with lower cabinets only.

       I’m really happy with both remodels and we didn’t break the bank on either.

    4. this sounds 100% like a reason to revisit the idea. Your problem sounds more like a layout issue than a space issue, though… is there a way to move the appliances (even though that will cost more, obviously, than leaving them in place) to help with that? Like, a shortsighted positioning of dishwasher across from fridge or oven means no one can enter or leave the kitchen if both are open at once, etc.

       For context, your existing kitchen is approximately 90% of the square footage of the entire first floor of my house, though, so the thought of needing even more space than that just for the kitchen doesn’t really compute for me :)

       1. Haha, I posted about my two refaces above but I still can’t get into the laundry room when the fridge is open. Old house problems – my kitchen was never built to house a refrigerator, or a dishwasher for that matter. I still have a “cold” cabinet in the pantry, with an opening to the outside of the house.

          1. https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/24378/quick-10-10-quirks-old-houses

             They call it a cold closet here. I also have a servants staircase (half staircase, it meets the main staircase on the landing) and a very small butler’s pantry, though mine doesn’t have a sink.

             This is not an enormous mansion, it’s under 3000 square feet and is a standard 4 square design.

          2. ha, same here! (mid-1800’s rowhouse.) My kitchen is about 7×9… thankful the prior owners used smaller European appliances to maximize the space!!

       2. +1 – your kitchen is the size of my living/kitchen/dining area. Tweak the layout. There’s no way anyone actually *needs* more space – in fact, you probably need less to have a really good layout that doesn’t have you running all over the kitchen just to cook a meal.

    5. Here’s a thought: if you’re going to spend a hundred thousand dollars on your kitchen remodel, you should LOVE the result and nothing should be described as an “eyesore.”

    6. DH and I constantly debate the merits of a kitchen remodel. The layout is terrible, and the only “cheap” fixes are replacing the appliances–every other possible decision creates a domino effect where we essentially have to gut the kitchen, and then we might as well fix the layout.

       We’ve basically decided that we’re going to fix the 2 things and live with it for 5 years. The other day, I suggested that we live with the kitchen for 15 years, then move back to the 2-bedroom apartment in our rental property. We love the apartment and its location, but we outgrew it. Maybe when our youngest is in college, we can downsize back to it and its lovely kitchen (which will need a face lift).

    7. Do you feel 100% positive about your financial position being secure amidst the pandemic? If not, that might be another consideration to do the less expensive one? I wouldn’t be inclined to do the major overhaul if I were likely to dislike/not love it and might also consider environmental impact, if possible (e.g., would refacing/repainting the cabinets create less waste.) Do you love yo cool or spend a ton of time in your kitchen or is it more of an aesthetic choice and are you concerned about home resale value or doing it solely for your own enjoyment?

       1. *to cook

       2. Great questions (and thanks to everyone else for their thoughts). It’s only for my family’s benefit – it probably won’t significantly impact the resale value. We use the kitchen a lot, even more so right now with everyone home all the time. While we can afford the big remodel, but I agree with everyone who says if I spend that much and it’s not perfect, I know I will be unhappy.

11. I work FT.
    Spouse works FT.
    Next month, kids start distance learning at two different schools that they will be new at.

    I bought a 2020-2022 planner.
    I bought them for my kids so they can keep track of things.

    3 planners = we are screwed until 2023, no? Sorry — was not thinking of the jinx implications of this when I did it :(

12. How often do you buy clothing that is not objectively flattering to your complexion, but you can’t help but love and be drawn to, especially if the styling is on point? That color for me is saffron. So bright. So pretty. So very wrong for my light, pinkish complexion. :( I shouldn’t buy it, right?

    1. Buy things you’re going to feel great in. Don’t buy things you’re going to feel awful in. So in this case it depends on how bad the color is on you and how you’re going to feel wearing it. If you feel fab, it’s your color!!

    2. Nah, buy it. If you wear makeup, go a little further with it on those days if you feel you looked washed out. If not into makeup, wear a necklace or hair accessory (like a scarf or headband) in a color that’s better for your complexion to balance it out.

       Or, don’t do either of these things! I love color too much to limit myself to colors that technically flatter me.

    3. I wouldn’t buy it if it objectively looks terrible on you, but if it’s just that it’s not the most flattering color for your skin, maybe find a way to break it up so it’s not right next to your face? I personally look amazing in royal blue and blue is my favorite color. I own waaaaaay too many blue dresses and probably too many royal to navy blue tops. I look fine in lighter shades of blue or purple, but they’re not as striking as royal blue. If I just love the item and it’s only available in a lighter shade, then I’d buy it and enjoy it, even if I know that it’s not as flattering as another shade. I look terrible in yellow and orange, they just do not work with my skin tone. Fortunately, I also don’t like those colors, but I would do my best to avoid shirts or dresses if those are the primary colors. If it’s a hint of yellow or orange in a printed blouse or something, that works.

    4. I have your same coloring and similarly drawn to colors that are all wrong for us. I might buy something inexpensive but definitely wouldn’t splurge on anything outside of my most flattering color palette. The exception is a skirt or pants — anything that isn’t close to my face.

    5. Go crazy with skirts, pants, belts, or shoes in colors that you don’t find flattering near your face. Buy a few great neutral tops to wear with those colors.

    6. All the time. I had my colors done, but hate the colors that I am supposed to wear.

    7. I’m probably too late, but never. No brown, no orange, minimal green for me. It’s very much a “nice for her but not for me” thing. I want to feel my best, and if the color makes my complexion look terrible? Not feeling my best!

13. That or use it in accessories or on bottom so it’s not close to your face.

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