Coffee Break: ‘Paradise’ Croc Embossed Suede & Leather Satchel

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1. Does it make sense to try to reach out to a recruiter about trying to find an in-house job? I’m a mid-level biglaw associate.

   1. You can reach out but chances are it won’t happen that way. Most companies will not pay a recruiter 100-150k to find a candidate when they can post a position and get hundreds of resumes for free. Obv it’s different if they need someone super specialized or if they’re in a remote location.

   2. Linked in, law crossing, ACC, etc. are probably better bets, plus networking. There are some outside headhunters who handle in-house staffing, but they more typically work for the companies and (IME) few recruiters work on the employee/lawyer side of in-house staffing.

   3. One problem is that most recruiters like to act as though they do mostly or exclusively in-house recruiting, but you’ll soon find out they don’t really do much of any, for the reasons mentioned above- most companies, unless they’re looking for a new GC, are unlkely to use recruiters because posting the position on Go-Inhouse or Indeed will yield a ton of results and their internal HR departments can weed people out initially.

      1. Set up an Indeed daily email alert. That’s how I found my awesome in-house job.

   4. Hey, I actually found success with a recruiter (did not advertise as being in-house only though knew that was my strong preference) – my current role is in-house that I got from a recruiter. I also supplemented it heavily with my own searches on the sources listed above, but yes, it can happen! They threw me two in-house positions that resulted in offers. I applied to dozens on my own and from those, ended up receiving offers/getting in final stages from three others.

2. If you have a gap on your resume – esp in law esp in commercial lit, how has your career worked out? Was at a firm for 8 yrs in NYC, just when I came up for partner my dept lost major business and lost clout within the firm thus they couldn’t make partners and pushed out existing seniors and partners. So 18 months unemployed and then I landed at a financial agency in the fed govt in DC though not in enforcement. It’s been 12 months and I really hate it – the pace, people etc. Anyone willing to throw out some guesses as to whether a return to the private sector is plausible? Not biglaw as I’m now worried about going to a big firm that’ll hire me as a 12th yr assoc bc they have a lot of work and them get rid of me in 18 months – since it’s happened to me once. Has the gap forever harmed my chances?

   1. Do you have trial, deposition, etc. experience? Meaning could a partner at a mid-level firm that has too much work hand off cases to you and you can handle them on your own? Because there are firms who seek of counsel candidates (or whatever they choose to call them) for this purpose. I think it sounds like, unfortunately, you are off partnership track for the immediate future unless your BFF gets a GC position and can create you a book of business.

      1. OP here – Yes – trial and depo experience and can run cases from start to finish. I have no problem being a service partner, of counsel, or even a senior associate at some place that’ll let me develop. It’s just that having been at a vault 50 type of firm recently I know they won’t do that – many have too many seniors of their own; many have lost seniors so they hire ppl to run cases for them but w no intent of keeping them for the long haul – at least my firm did this a lot. So obv I don’t went to give up a steady gig and jump to biglaw only to be out of work in late 2017.

         For everyone who says I’m off partner track “for now” – any way to get back on or is that goal lost forever? I just can’t fathom govt for 30 more yrs – it’s just not me.

         1. There are mid-level firms that look for someone in your role. I’d get in touch with some recruiters who serve that market, network, and make sure that you and the firm have an understanding of what your role will be before you make the jump. It happens.

   2. You have posted here before at least once and possibly more, right? I feel like you were given very good advice last time around.

      I’m very skeptical that you “just can’t fathom govt for 30 more years” — there is a huge range of govt work, and so many private practice attorneys jump ship to gov’t because the responsibility and freedom to run your cases is so much greater. Why have you written off gov’t work altogether? I worked in BigLaw for 5 years and can say without a doubt the work I do now in gov’t is far more important and impactful.

      If you are truly set on private practice, I think it can be done but look at smaller and midsize firms. How did you spin your 18 month gap to get the job you currently have? I would start there.

      Good luck.

      1. I agree. Also, I think that the OP just needs to start applying for jobs.

         I know it can be hard/overwhelming, and totally understand being afraid after a long period of unemployment, but you don’t enjoy where you’re at and you want to eventually be a partner at a firm. Why wait? I don’t think you’re going to find the perfect solution prior to applying and interviewing.

      2. I don’t know. I’ve worked in the government and in BigLaw and I truly prefer BigLaw. I hated how bureaucratic the gvt was and how long it took to get simple things done. I’m much more autonomous in private practice.

      3. I agree. Someone who has spent too much time in government will have one heckuva time getting a job in a private law firm; at least one that is of any size / quality. Sure there are always Sh**tty firms that will take you on, but all they do is take a percentage of your business as the cost of putting your name on the letterhead. If you are any good, and not tainted by the gap in your resume followed by a short period of time in a government agency that probably shares your views as to your fit, which unfortunately brands you as a dullard, whether true or not, you should just hang out your own shingle. That way, you keep 100% of your take, which could be very little, but at least you are not subsidizing some fat lazy partner to sit in the corner office and direct firm business (and draw down from your billings). Good luck!

         1. Ellen?

   3. Of course you can go back to private practice. Stop wallowing and make a plan. Speak to people you know. Figure out what you offer. Identify smaller firms that do that work. Apply.

   4. I remember you posting about this at least twice before. I’m genuinely sorry that you are feeling so stuck and that your career didn’t go in the direction you planned. That said, this random bunch of Internet strangers is not a great source of help. Have you looked into whether there’s a local group that provides support to lawyers going through career/life challenges?

   5. Only one way to find out! Apply to anything and everything! You’ll be playing a numbers game at this point, but don’t rule out going in-house or going to a different government gig. Or even a non-law job!

3. Any idea how to target that type of recruiter? I’ve only ever talked to biglaw types and when they hear I’m a mid 2000s grad who didn’t make partner and has a resume gap, that’s the end of that.

   1. Are you open to considering smaller/less prestigious markets? If you’re in a big city like NYC or DC, you’re right that you’re in a bad spot with recruiters, but there are often smaller recruiting shops that specialize in the suburbs around larger cities who would be more than willing to rep a V50/gov’t agency alum, even with the resume gap, and you’ve have a better chance at partner in an environment like that. Basically, look for markets where you can be a “big fish in a little pond,” so to speak.

4. Does anyone here have experience working with dog rescue orgs in DC? There are so many, and reviews of many on Yelp (if they exist) seem to be few and biased in either direction. For reference, my husband and I are looking to adopt a dog under 50 lbs., ideally from a foster home instead of a shelter. Thanks!

   1. By “working with” I mean “adopting from”!

   2. I used to volunteer for Best Dawg Rescue out of Bethesda. It was years ago, but I would recommend taking a look at their adoptable dogs. I was happy with the work they did and at the time, didn’t find them to be super crazy with the adoption process. http://www.dawg-rescue.org/

   3. We rescued our pup from Lost Dog Animal Rescue – https://lostdogrescue.org/- they are wonderful and we had a great experience with them.

   4. A few of our neighbors went through lucky dog. All of our animals are from WARL.

   5. Big Fluffy Dog Rescue!

   6. Homeward trails! Love, love love them. We have adopted from WARL and liked them too. But if you want a fostered dog (which we did because you get more insight into their personality), we did great with HT. we had a bad experience with city dogs and I would not adopt from them again, although from what I’ve heard that seems to be an anomaly.

   7. My old roommate’s dog was from Lucky Dog and they were great and he was awesome.

      Another friend fostered then rescued through Wolf Trap, which she also loved.

5. So thinking about moving (vaguely, not seriously yet) to DC without a position lined up. However I do have a contact who may be able to find me some legal temp work. My question is, what does a legal temp usually do? I want to make sure this is something I could actually handle. Specifically, how much legal knowledge do I need because my knowledge of “legalise” would look like Elle Woods’ Harvard video essay…

   1. Wait, did you go to law school? Not clear from your post.

      1. I did not. The person who mentioned this to me knows that so I didn’t think it mattered, but she can be a bit flighty so it’s possible she didn’t even think about it. Hence why I asked.

   2. I’ve seen people like paralegals or other law office staff hired on a temporary basis, like if the full-time paralegal is on maternity leave. Depending on the type of position it could require anywhere from no background knowledge (put these things in alphabetical order; duplicate this binder; etc.) to some background knowledge (file these complaints; draft these demand letters) to a lot of knowledge (fill in these purchase agreements for me to review; create the closing package for this deal). You’ll really want to know what you’re getting into to see if it’s worth your time.

   3. This is going to vary highly by firm and the type of placement your contact is envisioning. Since you don’t have a JD or prior legal experience, I assume we’re talking about a temp placement as an admin–whether that be secretarial, reception, file clerk, etc.–and obviously not contract paralegal or attorney work.

      Again, this will vary by firm, by at the firms I’ve worked at a receptionist temp placement is the most common. For that, you’d mostly need to have customer service skills and experience with office phone systems. If you don’t have prior office experience, I think it’s less likely you’d get a secretary placement, but those positions typically involve answering your attorneys’ phones and taking messages or routing their calls, drafting transmittal letters and entering revisions in Word, and other general administrative tasks like preparing FedEx and USPS packages to go out and making copies/scans.

   4. I was a “junior paralegal” for the summer between college and law school. I had no legal knowledge. The only real problem was not on really legal stuff, but legal office parlance. E.g., I didn’t know that the big red accordion folders are “redwelds” and that having all the documents numbered is called “Bates stamping” them. But you look at someone blankly the first time they say it, then you learn. If you’re a good worker, you can be a good support staffer at a law firm.

6. What are your best ideas for “fun” workouts? I saw a friend’s America Ninja Warrior gym in an Instagram video and it just looked like a really great way to get a full body workout without feeling like you’re doing crunches all day. Does anyone have any other suggestions for similar play-oriented workouts?

   1. Look up parkour. It’s all about making the world your playground/gym. There are places you can go to train specific things but it’s always the goal to take it outside.

      I used to do all that kind of stuff when I was a gymnast. I’d really like to get back into it myself.

   2. Original Strength. Very play oriented, but they don’t have a major national presence so you’ll have to find affiliates where you are located.

   3. Rock climbing

7. I’m spending the long weekend in Seattle. What are fun must-do things? I’m staying downtown and won’t have a car so I will be using public transport and/or Uber.

   Also, if anyone has Seattle restaurant recommendations for someone who can’t eat fish/shellfish, I’d love to hear them!!

   1. Enjoy! Restaurants – Metropolitan Grill (Russell Wilson’s favorite) is downtown and fantastic. All of Tom Douglas’s restaurants are great and have lamb, pork, beef and vegetarian entrees as well as the seafood specialties.

      EMP has a Star Trek exhibit now that I want to see. Take the monorail from Westlake Center.

      Walking along the waterfront and seeing the sculpture park is nice. There are low-cost bike share stations everywhere – Pronto Bikes – and you could ride along the waterfront trail if the weather is nice.

      The Center for Wooden Boats is next to the Museum of History and Industry, both of which are on Lake Union. There are historical boats tied up next to MOHAI that you can tour. Daniel’s Broiler is on the water next to MOHAI and is an excellent restaurant specializing in steaks and chops. Take the South Lake Union street car from Westlake Center (but don’t call it South Lake Union Transit…SLUT -haha) it drops you off right in front of The Center and MOHAI.

   2. In moderation for the sl-u-t word below.

      Enjoy! Restaurants – Metropolitan Grill (Russell Wilson’s favorite) is downtown and fantastic. All of Tom Douglas’s restaurants are great and have lamb, pork, beef and vegetarian entrees as well as the seafood specialties.

      EMP has a Star Trek exhibit now that I want to see. Take the monorail from Westlake Center.

      Walking along the waterfront and seeing the sculpture park is nice. There are low-cost bike share stations everywhere – Pronto Bikes – and you could ride along the waterfront trail if the weather is nice.

      The Center for Wooden Boats is next to the Museum of History and Industry, both of which are on Lake Union. There are historical boats tied up next to MOHAI that you can tour. Daniel’s Broiler is on the water next to MOHAI and is an excellent restaurant specializing in steaks and chops. Take the South Lake Union street car from Westlake Center (but don’t call it South Lake Union Transit…SL-UT -haha) it drops you off right in front of The Center and MOHAI.

   3. I like to encourage tourists to get out of the downtown core. Pike’s Place is fun for a little while, but so crowded this time of year! Though Zig Zag café (behind the market, on the steps) is most def worthwhile if you like cocktails! You can also hop on the ferry to West Seattle and stroll/kayak/bike Alki beach (Marination has great drinks), or go to Bainbridge Island. The C bus line will take you to Greenlake, which is gorgeous. The D will take you through Belltown (lots of places to eat and drink), Queen Anne (beautiful historic homes and views of the water), and Ballard (great farmer’s market Sunday, lots of food and beer). Fremont has a great local beer scene and it’s not too far from downtown–you could even walk there along Lake Union if the spirit moved you.

      1. Don’t be surprised if the C line is called the E line in downtown! It goes between North Seattle and West Seattle, and switches somewhere in between.

         I agree about getting out of downtown. My favorite things to do are:
         – breweries in Ballard. Reuben’s, Stoup, and Lucky Envelope are my faves
         – going on the Theo’s Chocolate Factory tour in Fremont, make reservations ahead of time
         – Ballard Locks to watch the boats go by and see the fish ladder. They have concerts on weekends in the summer sometimes
         – Rent a kayak or stand-up paddle board at Green Lake or at Lake Union and get out on the water
         – Go to any of the big parks (Discovery, Seward, Carkeek, Magnuson), enjoy feeling like you’re not in a city at all
         – The Underground Tour is super fun
         – Take a ferry either to Bainbridge or Bremerton, have a drink and appetizer at one of the places right off the ferry dock, then ferry back
         – Water taxi to West Seattle, drinks at Marination Ma Kai

         Food Recommendations:
         – Staple and Fancy in Ballard. Get the tasting menu and let them know you don’t eat fish, they’ll tailor it around that
         – Portage Bay Cafe for breakfast/lunch
         – Tillikum Place Cafe, get the french press coffee.

   4. Do the underground tour! It’s so fun. The Experience Music Project is also awesome.

8. Book or article recommendations — is there any book (or preferably shorter – like a Forbes article) that you’ve read re anyone’s professional success and determination that you found inspiring? Something that gave you confidence to keep pursuing your goals, no matter what others may think?

   Doesn’t have to be in any particular industry, though I’d prefer it NOT be something in start up tech (bc I honestly don’t relate to 20 yr olds who can drop out of college and start a billion dollar company) and WOULD LIKE it to be somewhat recent — i.e. not how Milton Hershey got started in the 1900s.

   1. Read an article recently on Julia Stewart who went from waitress to ceo of IHOP/Dine Equity. Believe the jist was that she got passed over for ceo position and ihop, moved to Applebee’s, made it to CEO, and then they bought IHOP…. Fascinating story.

      1. Awesome – this is the kind of thing I’m looking for.

   2. I’m following to see other suggestions. This is a category of books I’m definitely interested of. I’m going to look up Julia Stewart.

      I just finished Steve Martin’s memoir Born Standing Up. There’s a lot in there about perseverance and he has a really interesting story coming up in entertainment through working at Disneyland in the early years.

      Stephen King’s On Writing included a lot about his determination and drive.

      This probably falls into the tech category you’re trying to avoid, but I liked #GIRLBOSS by Sophia Amoruso.

      So Good They Can’t Ignore You by Cal Newport is more personal development than memoir but fits into what you’re looking for. I’m in the middle of his newest book called Deep Work about a practical method for putting So Good They Can’t Ignore You into practice.

      1. I thought of one more. Mum’s the Word by Eve Branson (Richard Branson’s mom). She obviously has had a different life due to money, but she is a super feisty woman who just doesn’t care what anyone else thinks. She pretended to be a boy to get a job as a glider pilot instructor, danced in somewhat scandalous shows in London, and became a flight attendant in the early days of commercial flights.

         She says that she and her husband taught their kids that the world was theirs for the taking but that it was up to the kids to make things happen. I found her really inspiring even though her life is so drastically different than mine. The book is fascinating.

   3. Diana Nyad’s autobiography about swimming to Cuba
      https://www.amazon.com/Find-Way-Diana-Nyad/dp/0385353618

9. Maybe there’s no answer to this bit how do you get over the fear of job searching? Took me 2.5 yrs to get my current job which isn’t great. I really want to move on. But I’m scared to look – last time it took 2.5 yrs to get a bad job, so this time I keep thinking – what if I don’t get anything at all. It’s almost like getting rejected will clarify that I better learn to live with this job bc this is it.

   I know everyone will say network – but I’m just not connected and I’m the type of person ppl are fine having around to do the hard work but no former boss or colleague cares enough to go to bat for me – even if they gave me glowing reviews when we worked together. Believe me I know – I tried unsuccessfully to tap all kinds of contacts and it didn’t work.

   1. Honestly, is your depression about job searching coming across in interviews and with former employers? What if you think about it not as networking but making connections?

   2. “Maybe there’s no answer to this bit how do you get over the fear of job searching?”

      You remind yourself that if you don’t start now, in one year you’ll wish you’d started a year ago. (like with me and exercise. hmm)

      You have a job, so it sounds like your biggest fear is fear of failure/rejection?? Job searching is awful, but if you have one, there’s no reason to be scared, just prepared for frustration. But, the answer is no until you ask, and recognize that struggling to find a job is not a reflection on your worth as a person.

10. Let’s talk organization. My kids have so many toys, many with small pieces, and I’m at a loss on a good way to organize them. We currently have an Ikea shelf with four large drawers, and the toys go in there. And we try to put puzzle pieces in ziplock bags so that the pieces aren’t everywhere. But invariably, a week later, everything is in dissarray. Thoughts?

    1. I think the solution is more in getting the kids to clean up and only use one toy than any container.

       1. I just LOLed at this. I have twins who are nearly three. Maybe someday…

       2. Haha.

          Seriously though, what about something like shoeboxes or something that will act as dividers within the drawers? Ikea has some storage boxes that fit within drawers.

       3. We make our 2 yo out away his toys so it’s not that crazy. Agree with WK about rotating toys too.

    2. Toy rotation. Google it.

11. I am 38 and have had blackheads on my nose probably since the age of 8. I have tried everything to get rid of them, including charcoal masks, salicyclic acid, and prescription retin-a. I have never done anything professionally but I’m thinking that is the way to go, since obviously my way has not worked. Any recommendations for what specific treatments I should look into?
    Thanks everyone! :-)

    1. I’ve found that Biologique Recherché lotion p50 toner has done wonders for my pores and blackheads… And I’ve struggled with them for over a decade! It’s expensive, but small bottle to try is reasonable. Even though lotion is in the name, it’s actually a toner.

    2. Micro-dermabrasion is the only thing that’s ever rid me of blackheads. I am too lazy/cheap to do it on the regular, alas.

    3. Microdermabrasion and extractions with a facialist four times a year when the seasons change. Two times a week, I chemically exfoliate and use a Charcoal mask (Origins) and that helps keep them at bay in between.

12. I don’t know how bad your blackheads are but I had little blackheads and whiteheads on my nose that bugged me even though no one else seemed to see them when I asked (bff, bf). I used microwavable wax (the kind used for waxing eyebrows or upperlip) to get them out. I would take a hot shower, then heat up the wax and apply as if removing hairs. Then when I pulled it off I could see little black heads and whiteheads would also come out! It was super satisfying for some reason. Then I would apply a soothing mask and cleanse or just cleanse and put on a non-clogging moisturizer or night cream.

    1. My facialist tells me anything like this would make your pores larger. Have you found this?

       1. Nope! And I’ve been doing it for years. Maybe my small pores are genetic? My dermatologist and facialst both know I do this and have never said it will enlarge pores.

13. I’m looking for leads on plus size work pants with long inseams.

    I’m size 18-20 and 5’10”, disproportionately leggy. The standard 30″ inseam is out of the question. 32″ is barely long enough bare footed but looks stupid with shoes.

    I like a 34-35″ inseam.

    1. Ps prefer washable pants if possible. Workplace is not super formal.

    2. Eddie Bauer and Old Navy come to mind

    3. The Limited is a great go-to. Most of their pants are going to need to line dry or dry flat, but I don’t even need to iron them (sometimes I’ll hang by cuffs if concerned). They only go up to an 18 but the Exact Stretch pants, I swear by now.

       NY&Company also. Though YMMV on quality so try it on in store when possible. Goes up to 20.

       Long Tall Sally also. They go up to 24 and you can choose specifically by inseam (so magical). Check reviews on site, sometimes an item will change over the years for the worse.

    4. It might be slim pickings because of the season, but Gap has longs in up to size 20 and their longs are usually decently long. I think Talbots does, too. Also, try Betabrand. Not sure how their bigger sizes fit, but my long pants from there were ridiculously long.

14. Work etiquette question:

    We just finished our self-review process here at my company. My boss called me in to her office to discuss another employee’s goals. Our legal department is spread over 2 offices, and she asked me if I felt an attorney from our other office who has a similar set of responsibilities to me had fulfilled one of the goals she apparently put down for herself. I genuinely did not know the answer to this question because she and I generally split our responsibilities by office and don’t collaborate very much, and I basically said as much.

    It made me feel extremely uncomfortable to be asked this question. I don’t feel like evaluating my coworkers is or should be my responsibility. Is it as weird as it felt to me that my boss asked me this? For a bit more context, I’m junior to the other attorney by several years both in experience and in length of time employed by this company.

    Should I tell the attorney from our other office about this conversation?

    1. Don’t tell the attorney from the other office about this conversation.

       I feel that when superiors ask colleagues to evaluate each other that is a sign of bad and disconnected management. This is a manager who doesn’t know the people working for her well enough to judge for herself. i think you handled it as well as you could have, considering you were caught off guard.

       1. “bad and disconnected management” is so, so accurate.

15. Two news flashes late Thursday afternoon:

    1. This is the most hilarious thing I’ve seen in ages: http://www.askamanager.org/2016/06/i-was-fired-from-my-internship-for-writing-a-proposal-for-a-more-flexible-dress-code.html

    2. Adnan Syed (of “Serial” fame) has been granted a new trial. Interesting…

    1. Seriously? a new trial?

    2. That AAM. OMG. It’s terrible. Even worse is I could absolutely, 100% see former/current interns (even green new hires) of ours taking the same approach. Thank you for the read!

       1. I was actually cringing reading that AAM. It’s so bad.

          A friend of mine told me last week her interns asked if they could work from home. I was like, “……………..”

    3. JFC that intern story

16. Wish me luck, ladies? I have an interview tomorrow for a promotion that’s freaking me the heck out D:

    1. Good luck – relax, be confident and nail it!

17. Does anyone have experience with invisalign? I got my first trays today and am feeling very down about it- they are not invisible at all, incredibly painful to take out, and I can’t close my mouth properly. I can’t imagine doing this for a year! would love to hear anyones experience

    1. I did Invisalign, whole process took a year (just got them off last week and am delighted with results!). The first week or two was pretty brutal and then it got WAY better thereafter (no pain, and much easier to take in and out). I found the trays very comfortable for all except the first day or two of each new one. Your mouth just has to get used to it. I found that swishing with cool water really helped for those first couple weeks.

       1. Thank you that helps to hear- it’s so hard taking the trays out! I feel like I am going to ripoff the attachments or my teeth. I will try to be positive until I get used to them

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