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I've featured some non-traditional earrings before, but they've usually a bit more of a splurge — so I was excited to see that BaubleBar has many similar styles but for much, much more affordable prices, including threaders, crawlers, and more. (I'm undecided on the trend for a huge backing earrings, but got this pair of garnet earrings for myself.) For a more office-ready look, I like these delicate 1″ ear crawlers — it's a fashion-forward look for work without being too subversive. They're $32 at BaubleBar. BaubleBar Janet Ear Crawlers
(L-5)
Sales of note for 10.10.24
- Nordstrom – Extra 25% off clearance (through 10/14); there's a lot from reader favorites like Boss, FARM Rio, Marc Fisher LTD, AGL, and more. Plus: free 2-day shipping, and cardmembers earn 6x points per dollar (3X the points on beauty).
- Ann Taylor – Extra 50% off sale (ends 10/12)
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything plus extra 25% off your $125+ purchase
- Boden – 10% off new styles with code; free shipping over $75
- Eloquii – Extra 50% off a lot of sale items, with code
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off entire site, plus extra 25% off orders $150+
- Lo & Sons – Fall Sale, up to 35% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Neiman Marcus – Sale on sale, up to 85% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 50% off 2+ markdowns
- Target – Circle week, deals on 1000s of items
- White House Black Market – Buy one, get one – 50% off full price styles
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
AIMS
I don’t know if it’s just the way it looks on my screen, but I feel like this looks like crud on her ear. I’d say you’re better off being a bit more “subversive” with a more obvious earring vs. looking like you have a scab on your ear.
Anonymous
Yeah, this looks like she ran a Tough Mudder and didn’t get all the way clean afterward. Not a good look period, ignoring whether it’s professional or not.
Diana Barry
+1.
Cat
Yeah, I agree- particularly the way that one follows the crease. Odd mix of posts today, from the bizarrely conservative skirt post to these earrings.
CJ
Does anyone have experience with Bauble Bar in general (agreed, the weird gold one is not flattering!) ?
Some of their pieces are very cute, but it’s hard to tell if it’s crap material, for a not modest price. Anyone pleased with the pieces they got from Bauble Bar?
txatty
Late to the game, but I have 15-20 different pieces from bauble bar (necklaces and earrings) and have been really impressed.
Wildkitten
I hate the huge back earrings. They remind me of the keloids some people get from piecing, which is mostly an irrational response, but they still irrationally gross me out.
Ellen
I agree with Wild kitten. I prefer to be demure and light on the jewelery, exept of course , watches. I love a nice Rolex watch, and when I get married, I want my husband to buy me a Rolex. YAY!!! I do NOT want an I watch. I already have an ipod, iPad, Imac and Macbook air, thank you Apple, but I am NOT about to put a computer on my sleeve. FOOEY! While I d NOT require the crown jewels, I want to look like a LADY! YAY!!!!!
Wildkitten
You should just buy yourself a Rolex, Ellen.
Lyssa
I think that I would work better and more comfortably with a standing desk most of the time, so I’ve been thinking about getting a converter to put on top of my work desk, something like this one: http://www.amazon.com/UpTrak-Sit-Stand-Desk-Award-Winning/dp/B00Y3NLOA0/ref=sr_1_18?ie=UTF8&qid=1439318330&sr=8-18-spons&keywords=standing+desk+top
Does anyone use anything like this? I noticed that the reviews are sort of mixed, but I’m having trouble finding anything that converts from sitting to standing easily that doesn’t cost a fortune. I do think that I’d like to be able to sit when I’m writing intensively (or if I’m just not feeling well or something), so I’d like it to be easily adjustable. It would have to be large enough for a standard monitor (I can add a wireless keyboard and mouse). I’d really hate to go over $200 on something like this. (Really, even that seems like a lot, particularly given the mixed reviews, but maybe I’m just being cheap?)
Also, for anyone who uses a standing desk, how do you handle shoes? I don’t think that I’d want to switch over to shoes I could stand all day in all the time, but I could see myself kicking off my heels and standing either barefoot or keeping some comfy slip-ons under my desk and switching back to heels before leaving my office.
Anonymous
I stand barefoot (or in tights in the winter) on a cushioned mat. My office is casual enough that I can venture out to the printer a few feet away without putting on shoes, so it’s really not a big deal if someone comes in and I’m barefoot. My shoes are always close enough though that I can easily slip them on (and they’re a style I can slip into without having to reach down).
No experience with that particular adjustable model because I have a fixed height desk, but on first glance the work surface looks kind of small for what I would prefer.
Wildkitten
Several people in my office have Vari Desks and they like them (though they are Vari Expensive, har har har).
anon
VariDesks are beginning to be made available in my office. Everyone who has one loves it. I want one but have been traveling too much lately to find the time to jump through all the hoops to order one. They run $350 – 400 retail.
Most VariDesk users in my office have cushioned mats to stand on. I am the only person who ever wears heels in the office (a few others will wear them for external meetings), so shoes are not an issue for anyone else. When I do get a VariDesk I imagine that I’ll just kick off my heels while standing.
Lyssa
They are that! I’m considering waiting a few months and asking for one for Christmas, but a) that seems too practical to waste my Christmas gift on, and b) I don’t really want to wait that long. I’m just back from maternity leave, so I’m looking for anything to make the office more pleasant right now!
Blonde Lawyer
Is asking your office to pay for it out of the question for you?
Lyssa
My office is pretty traditional and doesn’t have a system for things like that, and no one else has anything like that, so I’m going to go with yes, I wouldn’t feel comfortable asking. (Obviously, it would be different if it were a disability or other “need” issue, but I think that this is more of a want.)
ace
I got one for Xmas last year! I like having the option, though I probably don’t use the standing feature as much as I should. Order directly to your office as the piece is giant and heavy and would be a nightmare to move.
Constant Reader
I have a varidesk which I purchased up front and my company reimbursed me.
Pros: comes assembled! easy to go from sit/stand, comes with a desktop app which will ping you when you need to stand up, it’s pretty sturdy.
Cons: last I checked the desk only comes in black so it can look a bit “chunky” on a smaller, light colored desk, price (although I thought price was fairly reasonable for sturdiness of desk).
I also use the anti-fatigue cushioned mat typically with flats (sometimes with wedges) but normally kick off my shoes which feels more comfortable. I have my shoes nearby in case someone comes into my office.
SuziStockbroker
I have one too, I just got it recently and haven’t gotten in the habit of using it all that much. I bought a bunch of cute pointy flats to wear at work though, so I would. I think I need a mat though.
Second the reader who said get it delivered to your office, it is big and heavy!
Diana Barry
I have a geek desk – it raises and lowers depending on what I want to do.
I stand most of the day except for 1-2 hrs around lunchtime. I only wear flats. I stand on a cushioned mat (you can google “best standing desk mat review” or something and a long post comes up with which one it is) – super thick and nice.
anon
IKEA now makes one as well. We just got it for home. At work, I have a Geek Desk (on Diana Barry’s reco!).
Josie Pye
I have a Kangaroo Pro Jr and I love it. It goes up and down, sits on top of my regular desk, and is very unobtrusive–nobody knows it’s there unless they have seen me using it. It was not that expensive (maybe 250-300) and my office bought it for me when I started. I also got a gel floor mat that helps a lot, and I end up taking off my shoes if they are at all uncomfortable. I keep a pair of slippers under my desk and wear them while I’m standing. They’re not cute at all, but very comfy and better than bare feet if someone stops by. I probably stand about half the day. Tons of people have seen me using it and then requested their own!
Renee
Had a Vari Desk before my employer bought everyone adjustable sit/stand desks. It’s important to be able to switch sitting and standing. You really shouldn’t stand all day and some days you will want to sit. Keep a comfy pair of shoes or slippers at work.
nutella
Random curious threadjack: how many of you who were ever engaged or married know how much was spent on the engagement ring if you had one? Does a joint married account effect that knowledge or not?
anon
My husband showed me all the paperwork, including the receipt, within a few weeks after giving me the ring. I would have found out how much it cost right after we got married anyway, since I am the one who buys the insurance.
mascot
At some point after the proposal and prior to combined finances, we discussed how much the ring cost (context was appraisal and insurance). I can’t remember now what the exact number was, but I know that we were comfortable with the number.
Subsequent jewelry purchases (or really any purchase) have come from joint accounts so we both know how much is being spent.
Lyssa
My (now) husband and I picked out the ring together, so I definitely knew, and knew the options and that sort of thing. We completely combined finances after we were married. FWIW, I’m the cheapskate in our relationship; he would have happily spent more. (Even though we picked it out together, he still did the ultimate purchasing and used it for an official proposal – obviously, I knew it was coming, but it was still mostly traditional, if that’s a concern for you. It’s fine, of course, if that’s not important to you, though.)
Susie
Mine was $2000, and I lost it before the wedding :o
Anonny
We talked about it before hand. We were co-habitating but hadn’t fully combined finances at that point, but we had a very clear expectations about marriage, timing, budgets, etc. I didn’t know the precise ring, but I knew he was choosing between a handful, all of which fell within the budget we set. It’s a joint decision, in my opinion – from purchasing the ring, determining how to finance it, and ultimately agreeing to get married.
KP
We shopped for engagement rings together and tried on different styles so I had a good sense of what the price of mine was although I didn’t ever see the receipt or anything. We also discussed what we thought was “too much” to spend.
Diana Barry
We picked it out together so I knew exactly what the price was. I think he gave the people “his” credit card although all of our stuff was joint at that point, kind of like how “he” will pay for dinner if we go out. :)
Clementine
The paying with ‘his’ card when we go out- mine does that too! At first this drove me nuts, but now I’ve found it to be more of an adorable, traditional quirk.
My husband is a proud feminist who supports me in my career immensely and is very rarely into ‘traditional’ gender roles, but this is one thing where he goes old-school. At first, I was concerned it was a red flag for bigger issues that would be a problem for me, but I’ve since come to see that it’s just a funny habit of his.
anon
My husband also pays with “his” card, and then I pay the bill on our joint credit card account from our joint checking account. I also mostly find this an adorable, traditional quirk.
Parfait
We share most expenses, but sometimes the Rocket Scientist will say, “I’m not submitting receipts for this. This is a DATE.” Aww.
Anon
I knew a couple of weeks after he bought the ring, when he showed me the GIAA certificate and some of the other ring-related paperwork and where it was stored in our filing cabinet. We were living together when we got engaged but hadn’t combined finances yet. Honestly, he spent more on my engagement ring than I would have liked, but it’s a gorgeous ring and he could afford it. He’s generally very budget/cost-conscious, so I view my ring as a one-time splurge for a special occasion. My husband has told me he looks at it as a family heirloom for our future grandkids, which I think is really sweet.
Anon
I know the exact dollar amount because I paid for it. He was a grad student, I was a six-figure professional, and I had zero problem paying for the ring myself. We designed it together and we’re both very happy with this decision. FWIW, finances are now joint. I outearn him, but I also outspend him :)
Former Partner, Now In-House
We shopped together. I asked for a budget. We had something made, and I asked if it was OK to use x metal versus y metal. And then it arrived and I sent the receipt to the insurance company to cover it. But we practice complete transparency in our household. Other people may disagree, but I find that hugely romantic.
Anonymous
For the E-ring, My husband paid with cash from his bonus so that I wouldn’t know, but I have a general idea.
We bought the wedding rings together, so I knew.
Anon
I have no idea and don’t want to know. It was a gift and how much he spent was his business (in my opinion). We now have fairly combined finances but I still wouldn’t ask him how much he spent on a gift for me — I trust him not spend more than he can afford.
another anon
Same here. Married 2 months, engaged over a year and a half ago…I have no idea and I don’t want to know.
Heather
I know exactly… I’d seen my ring at a pawn shop a month before and was going to buy it for myself. So mine was $110.
Anonymous
We went shopping together. Also, I had to put down the value when I got it insured.
Renee
I knew. No less romantic I felt. If you don’t want to know, go to a Tiffanys and try rings and pick your favorites at various price points so he’ll know what you like at various price points. Do this bc you might have different views on whether it’s worth putting money into diamond size, quality, setting, etc. at different price points so it helps to figure that out. For example, we decided size was our number one (up to the point where you could see faults with a naked eye) bc we assume all people that see the ring on my finger won’t get close enough to appreciate quality, but opinions differ.
Wildkitten
Has anyone signed up to be a Stella & Dot stylist just to get the starter pack discount?
anon
Looking forward to an interview later this week for a dream job. Can anyone share the best/most impressive question you have been asked by an interviewee
anon
Any question that demonstrates that the interviewee actually understands and is interested in the type of work that we do. We get a lot of candidates who apply simply because we hire people with the type of degree they have, but have no clue what we do and don’t bother to take the time to figure it out.
Anonymous
“What does success look like in this job?”
DC Anon
“What was the last book that you read?”
DC Anon
NEVERMIND, I misread your question. That was probably the most interesting question I’ve ever been asked in an interview (as an interviewee).
Wildkitten
When I was asked this question the book I was reading was the novel “Alternatives to Sex.” Obviously I could not tell them the truth so I tried to make up a lie and totally blanked and was not hired, probably for being illiterate. Don’t ask this.
Calico
This exact same thing happened to me!! I was reading a book about prostitution in the Old West. Got this question at an interview. I blushed, went blank, couldn’t for the life of me think of an innocuous book title. I’m sure it looked bizarre. Didn’t get the job.
Renee
I’m a mid-level employee. I’m impressed when people ask me thoughtful questions about what my boss is actually like.
Icemaker
In a pricey apartment, how essential would you think an ice-maker in a refrigerator is? I am not a fan of ice and do not care at all. But my friends are flipping out like this is a very big deal. [FWIW, unless I were in NYC, I would consider in-unit laundry to be essential. If I am having a party, I buy some bags of ice and otherwise have a few ice trays.]
BB
Depends how much you use ice? I couldn’t live without it and having those trays that you refill was super annoying. I probably drink 4+ glasses of ice water a day, and I often use big handfuls of ice during cooking (cooling blanched veggies etc.).
mascot
Even if you don’t use it in your own drinks, do you need it for cooking, chilling wine, injuries, etc? We use a fair amount of ice as well as reusable ice packs so an ice-maker is important to us. If we are entertaining more than a couple of people, we have to buy ice. Are you living without it now?
OP
Re chilling wine, I have a circular ice-pack-like-thingie that I use for chilling wine. It is fantastic! I own ice-buckets of various sorts and a large fancy metal trough thingie, but that’s for large parties.
I am one of those people who is always cold, so icing down a drink just doesn’t happen. And I keep my drinks in the refrigerator, so they always seem to be cold enough. I wouldn’t serve someone warm coke (and if the Coke were warm, would just use ice cubes from the trays).
Anonymous
This is not even a matter of consideration for me. Your friends are crazy
Anonymous
+1
Renee
+1
HSAL
That is crazy. I barely use ice but that’s what trays and bags are for. It wouldn’t even occur to me to check.
Maddie Ross
I agree with you – of all the things to be worried about in an apartment, this is pretty low on my list. It is totally do-able to buy ice when needed in bulk or have a couple ice trays around for pinch uses. But I also don’t drink ice in my water or beverages and prefer ice packs for injuries. If you didn’t have a freezer, that might be a deal-breaker. But an ice-maker is not a necessity.
Anonymous
Yeah, lack of a freezer would be a deal breaker. Lack of ice maker? Not so much.
Anonymous
I consider it essential, but that’s because I use ice all the time and hated my last unit that required me to refill trays several times a day (they often weren’t frozen yet when I needed them). But, you said you don’t like ice, so I think you do you, seems silly to reject an apartment for an “amenity” you won’t use. Buy ice if you have people over, an ice maker generally isn’t enough in those situations anyway.
Senior Attorney
We all have our own must-haves and our own dealbreakers. Sounds like for your friends, the icemaker is a must-have and the absence of one is a dealbreaker. So my suggestion is that they not move into an apartment without an icemaker, and that you not let it dictate your choice of apartment.
I didn’t have an icemaker in the Bachelore*t*t*e Pad after I left my husband, and while it’s nice to have one again now that I’m in my new house, I got along fine without it. I kept a couple of plastic ice trays in the freezer for random use and bought a bag of ice if I was going to have people over.
Bonnie
Not important at all. When we were renovating our small kitchen, DH wanted an icemaker but it would have required moving the fridge and running plumbing so we skipped it. We have a few ice cube trays in the freezer. For parties, we just buy bags of ice.
Meg Murry
Honestly, our fridge has an ice maker and we took it out to fix something and haven’t put it back in because it takes up a ton more room than a stack of ice cube trays do, and I prefer to have the space for food over ice.
Dishwasher and in-unit laundry have always been essential to me. Ice maker not so much.
Walnut
I yanked the ice maker out of my freezer. It was taking up space that was better allocated for ice cream. Humorously, after selling the house and the fridge with it, the next homeowners asked where the ice maker was.
Katie
Ours has been broken for… a year? And we haven’t bothered to replace it. I’ve never felt very inconvenienced by our lack of icemaker. Back when it worked, we still had to buy bags of ice for parties since it couldn’t keep up.
Anonymous
So, a friend and I have a trip to Turkey booked in October. How long would you wait before cancelling, given the recent attack on the US consulate? I think we can hold out for a couple more weeks to see if things stabilize, but I know others have cancelled their trips already.
Anon
I wouldn’t cancel.
TBK
The State Department hasn’t issued any kind of warning. Not that their warnings are foolproof, but I certainly wouldn’t consider canceling.
Anonymous
If you are going to western Turkey I wouldn’t cancel at all. I was there during the Soma mine disaster rioting and didn’t see any of it, although I met a couple that had been tear gassed because they weren’t aware of what was going on. Just see what various countries are recommending for travel and follow that. I typically follow the Brit’s travel advisory because they do it by region, which is much more realistic.
Anonymous
The current plan is western and central, but maybe we’ll cut out central turkey
Paging HM
If by central you mean Cappadocia, seriously don’t worry at all. If you mean further east than that, then maaaaaayybbee reconsider? Not so much for safety reasons but more for the fact that your leaving the beaten path and just invade something did happen there would be less services. dont be dumb. Register with the consulate, stay alert as to what the situation is, and have fun!
Anonymous
That’s reassuring! That’s exactly where I meant when I said central
SF in House
I was recently in Turkey and would agree with the other posters that as long as you are not planning on Eastern Turkey (near the Syrian border), you should be fine. We were surprised at the low volume of tourists in some areas and were told that tourism is way down this year because of perceived threats. At no time did we feel unsafe.
Anecdote
I was recently in Turkey, Israel, and Jordan. I never felt unsafe.
On the flipside, there were two separate gang/drug-related homicides in my VERY SAFE neighborhood while I was gone. I wouldn’t cancel.
Due in December
I have a trip planned for early September. I am planning on going.
Due in December
Oh, and am planning on going to Istanbul and Cappadocia. I’m going to sign up for State Department STEM alerts just so I know if there are any demonstrations to avoid (because I tend to stay off the internet while traveling).
Due in December
And I can report back! Provided, of course, that I make it back :)
Anonymous
Yes, please do report back!! I think you’ll be fine:)
pj's
Any recommendations for pajamas? I’m looking at a pair from Victoria’s Secret, but would love to avoid the mall.
Anon
Garnet hill.
Victoria’s secret is online? I don’t understand .
Anonymous
+1 VS’s online store (aka the virtual catalog) has more pjs than the stores do anyway.
anonomatopoeia
The members of this forum are always fantastic with trip suggestions, so I’d love suggestions for my honeymoon.
The current plan is to split about 10 full days between Rome and Sorrento (including the surrounding areas of Naples, Pompei, Capri and the rest of the Amalfi Coast). We’re going the last two weeks of May and any suggestions are welcomed and appreciated! I am most interested in hearing suggestions and opinions that we may not find in the popular travel books. What were your “wow” moments and what are things that are overrated and should be avoided?
If it informs your suggestions, I have never been overseas and my fiance did a tour around Italy when he was 9. TIA!
Anon
Rome can be overwhelming with the sites so that it’s easy to forget to explore the city. Build in some time in neighborhoods like Trastavere just cruising around, sitting at cafes, enjoying city life. Also the baths of caracalla are an overlooked “classical” site and really incredible (and peaceful!)
IMO you can skip naples…
Anonymous
I disagree, I really enjoyed a couple of days in Naples. It’s an interesting little city, and really does have the best pizza I’ve ever had.
Pippit
I thought Naples had some interesting things to see (Cabinete Secreto at the Archeological Museum- has all the naughty frescoes and sculptures from Pompeii) but the city itself felt highly sketchy. I wouldn’t plan to spend much time there. Capri is beautiful- I hear the green grotto is easier to get into and more beautiful than the blue grotto. And Pompeii is well known, but Herculaneum is smaller, easier to see all of it, and more of the art is still in place. Most of the stuff from Pompeii is now in the museum in Naples.
Rome is amazing. The Trevi Fountain blew my mind. The Sistine Chapel is every bit as amazing as its pictures. It’s just all gorgeous. Enjoy, and think of me when you have a tartuffo at the Tre Scalini restaurant in Piazza Navona.
Due in December
I loved actually going to Pompeii (it was the off season, though), but I didn’t love Naples itself.
Anecdote
Go to Naples… be VERY careful. Don’t wear anything flashy, look alert. The pickpockets are not a joke. A friend had multiple suitcases stolen at the train station when he turned around to buy tickets for a minute. Keep a hand on everything.
Pompeii is interesting; Rome is a madhouse. A beautiful, fascinating, engrossing madhouse. In my opinion the sites are about as good as the food is bad, and I’m 100% sure that is uniquely my experience. I’ve just had zero luck ever finding a decent non-tourist restaurant in Rome.
The Vatican is definitely worth seeing. If I could retire to the Amalfi Coast tomorrow, I would do it in a heartbeat. I’m not sure if they’ll be in season yet, but get the fried zucchini flowers if they are. Someone told me the tomatoes there were the best, and I totally blew them off because just about every region in Italy says that about their tomatoes. Wrong. It’s called caprese for a reason. I still dream about those tomatoes. Eat them at every opportunity.
CHS
All for Rome:
-Scavi tour at the Vatican, and if it’s going on while you’re there, highly recommend going to the Vatican for the special Friday night hours. Much quieter, calmer, and the sunset is priceless.
-Agree on neighborhoods. We stayed in Monti last time and loved it. Eat your way around Testaccio. Don’t miss having a trappizzino.
-Get your espresso standing up at the bar, and never pay more than a euro or two for it. (It is more expensive to sit.)
-Pack comfortable shoes. Plan on wandering the city at night – it is not as hot and is never more gorgeous.
-Download the Katie Parla food app. Never waste money on anything that doesn’t taste exceptional. You’re in Rome!
Anon
I guess I will be the one to tell you… Italian pizza isn’t very good, and Italian pasta comes with nuts on it, not cheese. But Italian cheese is the best, even if it is pricey. Get all the pastries and deserts, drink lots of wine, go to local restaurants. Be aware that rural Italy is very poor, like no electricity or running water poor. Lots of tourists are really shocked that *gasp* white Europeans live in this kind of poverty. I am not one for tourist things, I just like pretty architecture and relaxing. Having someone who speaks the language is handy in non-tourist areas. Its especially great if you have family to show you the secret things
Anon
This is interesting. I completely disagree about the pizza. It’s light and fresh and delicious, especially the classic margherita. As for rural Italy… This may be true in some parts in the South; I’m not convinced since I spent several months living in very rural areas of Italy and all of them had water and electricity. The only thing they don’t have is dryers which is pretty common in Europe, rural or not.
Anon
Well the vast majority of my family lives in southern Italy. So the fact that their neighbors live without modern comforts is my bench mark for the statement. You might have had americanized pizza, real Italian pizza is sort of squishy, they don’t cook it until crisp.
SC
Just a tip – If you’re interested in Pompei, all the guide books say to go early in the morning. But DH and I went late in the afternoon. I think we arrived around 4 pm. (I believe they close around dark, so in the summer, around 8 pm.) It was completely, eerily empty, and we had the entire area almost to ourselves. Maybe we just got lucky, but I think it’s actually far less crowded after the tour buses leave for the day. For the record, we loved Pompei and also Herculaneum, which felt less overwhelming because it’s much smaller.
I also loved Sorrento. And I felt like Ravello was overrated – nice enough but a little boring and could easily be skipped. But maybe it was just my mood or the weather or I didn’t do the right things, so YMMV.
AIMS
For Rome (and Florence) there is a wonderful restaurant app called EAT Rome written by a local food writer. We enjoyed all her recommendations and had many wonderful meals that way.
If you plan to travel by train, book your train tickets in advance from home – it will save you time and money, but be prepared to be initially frustrated by the website. I recommend upgrading to the “1st class” tickets – your travel will be a bit more comfortable & you get a glass of wine. Also, this may have changed in the last year or two but I found that calling hotels directly got you much better deals than doing it online (I got a $5 calling card and just figured out the time difference). Also paying in cash. Italy is old fashioned that way.
There’s a ton to do in Italy so agree with others that it’s important to not get so bogged down in doing it all that you forget to just enjoy and wander around.
madrilena (for now)
second the eat rome, eat venice, eat florence etc. apps done by an expat who travels and has very honest food reviews. go to Grom for great gelato (it is a chain so you’ll see it in different cities)
Anonymous
You absolutely do NOT need to book train tickets in advance. Every guide book will tell you to wait to buy until you’re there, because it’s so much simpler and gives you a lot more flexibility. We bought at the train station right before each departure and it was very easy.
Monte
What do you like to do? I love love love Rome, but I like to wander small streets, occasionally go to a museum, and eat and drink. I also loved Naples — met really friendly people (who did not attempt to steal my wallet), had great pizza and espresso and bread, had a few lovely runs, and ducked into some small, beautiful churches. Pompeii was fascinating, and we also got there late in the day — my then bf didn’t believe in doing anything before noon. I was wildly disappointed with Positano and Capri — seemed like places to be seen, but nothing unique to actually do or see.
I don’t know how you plan to travel, but as someone who has driven around a number of different countries on a number of continents, driving in Italy was one of the most harrowing decisions. Lane markers often appeared optional. Take a train if that works for your schedule at all.
West Coast
I loved stopping by Urbino for a couple days – it was one of the main centers during the Renaissance, and it’s really nice to get out of the hustle of the cities.
AN
Skip Naples and go to Florence. And Pisa. Naples is only good if you want to transit through on the way to Capri. I thought Capri was over rated. Do go to Pompeii or Herculaneum.
Anon Dog Owner
Hi ladies, I’m in need of some advice about my dog. (For background, I’m in BigLaw in DC and my dog, a rescue, began having serious separation anxiety and territoriality issues after I broke off my engagement and my fiance moved out. My parents, who live several hours away, have graciously kept him for several months until I could get into a new apartment and just get a better handle on things generally. He’s doing great there!)
I am in a better situation now and I miss my dog a lot, but I am beginning to get really nervous about bringing him back in a few weeks after I go home — I’m afraid the separation anxiety issues will be horrible when I’m gone during the day and that he will drive my neighbors crazy, to say nothing of the fact that I obviously hate the thought of my poor dog being sad. I’m pretty stressed generally about managing a dog as a single person with a crazy schedule, as my fiance and I got my dog together. (Full-time doggy daycare is not an option and neither is his continuing to live with my parents.)
Now that I have a roommate, I can afford a dog walker and will set that up for sure, in addition to our own walks. But any tips on separation anxiety generally and specific toys to keep a dog super occupied during the day? Any thoughts would be really appreciated!
Clementine
Wow! That sounds like a lot to go through, for both you and your pup. A few things: Talk to your vet about this! There might be drugs available that can help your pup- I know a few friends whose dogs are really helped by anti-anxiety meds.
See if the local dog walker has a doggie play group. Even going every other day might really help the pup adjust.
Toys that my dog LOVES: Consider feeding him at partially in a Kong or feeder ball. A kong stuffed with a little peanut butter and then frozen will keep a pup occupied for hours.
Some dogs really prefer a little noise, so consider leaving a radio on for the dog during the day (yes, really.).
Also, dogs are wonderful, sensitive companions. They know when something has changed or is upsetting you. Sometimes, all they need is time. Don’t expect the transition to be terrible right off the bat- pup might be just fine! Be positive and loving and make sure you take care of yourself as well. I think lots of long walks with the pup will be good for both of you.
Anon Dog Owner
Thanks, Clementine, for all these suggestions. I am going to talk with my vet and see what she thinks. Otherwise, I plan to drop about $200 at Amazon on Kongs and feeder balls and who knows what else. I wonder if boredom is an issue too.
Anonymous
Re: leaving noise, there are also dog-specific songs and albums you can download that are meant to soothe separation anxiety. “Through a Dog’s Ear” is one that my trainer recommended.
Before you spend a lot on Kongs and other toys, I’d start with one treat-stuffed kong and see if he plays with it while you’re gone. My dog goes nuts for a Kong, but he will not touch it if I’m gone. It sits there all day long, and then he’ll have at it when I get home. So, still a great toy but may not achieve what you’re looking for in terms of boredom relief. Also, my dog has a knack for getting all of his kongs and balls stuck under furniture, and he gets so stressed out over not being able to reach it that I think he’d get really frustrated if someone wasn’t there to get it out for him.
Can you try leaving him for really short periods, and then slowly increasing the time? Maybe you do this on weekends with intentional errands. I started my dog with half an hour and worked up (slightly different, this was when I was transitioning him out of the crate so if I needed to be gone longer, he went in the crate–he’d never really liked the crate, so I think he learned that if he was good, it was like “par-tay!” outside the crate and he didn’t even notice how long I was gone)
Lastly, if you haven’t tried crate training, that’s an option.
anonymous
How does your dog get along with other dogs? Could you get another one?
Wildkitten
I got my dog a cat. Seriously. They’re best friends and always have each other to play with and nobody gets lonely anymore, and the cat is a lot less work than another dog.
Anon Dog Owner
My roommate has a cat and I am clinging pretty tightly to this vision (fantasy?) of them being Milo & Otis. Maybe it’s not so crazy to think now that you’ve validated me, Wildkitten! He does get along great with cats.
anonymous, I don’t think another dog is an option given our lease. But maybe doggie play group is an option, as Clementine suggested.
Thank you all for your thoughts, I really appreciate it!
anonymous
well, I was shooting for an animal companion, so a cat works!
Anonymous
+1. One of our dogs has minor separation anxiety. When she was an only dog, she would destroy the occasional item (shoes, rip a hole in the carpet, chew furniture) or go through the trash. She would also turn aggressive if we weren’t there, so dog walker was out. (No one could come into our house without us.) Once we got another dog, she totally changed. Quiet, calm, and super happy. I think any companion animal would work, as long as they got along decently well. Can you pet sit for a friend to try it out?
CHJ
I hate to say this, but is there any chance your parents would keep the dog permanently? It sounds like the dog is happy there, which is huge for a rescue dog with anxiety issues.
If your parents can’t keep the dog, I did Biglaw as a single lady with a dog for a few years, and it was ok. Not great, but ok. I sent him to doggy daycare 3x/week (they picked up and dropped off, too — it was a complete splurge) and had a dog walker on the other days. The hardest thing was weekends, because the dog walkers weren’t always available on weekends and my dog wouldn’t get his normal outlet of attention and company if I had to be in the office on the weekend. I have a much less stressful job now, and he’s fine with just a group walk with a few other dogs once a day, and then lots of attention when I get home.
This also may seem counterintuitive, but could you get a second dog? It might help your dog to have a friend around all day so he doesn’t get too lonely.
Bonnie
Definitely talk to your vet about anxiety meds. Even if you can’t take your dog to daycare everyday, consider doing it at least once a week. Our dog is very high energy and we take her to daycare once during the week to give her the play time. If you pay for a package, Wagtime is open until 11 p.m. with no additional cost.
Meg Murry
I had a friend with a large dog that came from a rescue that had separation anxiety, and she found the only thing that worked for her in the beginning was to take the dog on long runs in the morning before work – as in several miles at nearly as fast as she could run. Not sure if it just wore the dog out and made him tired or what, but it worked for her. She also had a neighbor that loved the dog but didn’t want the commitment who would come play with him regularly mid-day, which also helped.
Is your parents house a place where the dog can regularly run around in a fenced yard, or just get out more in general? If the dog is happy there, that might be the best place for him long term, instead of alone in your apartment for long days. Or, as painful as this could be, back to the rescue organization. We wound up having to re-home our dog after it just wasn’t a good fit for us or the dog, and all of us (my family, the dog, and the new family) are much happier now, although we were very sad at the time. We still have “visitation” on the dog though, so she isn’t completely out of our lives.
anon a mouse
You also should make an effort to adjust your “single person with a crazy schedule” as much as possible to be around more for the dog, at least until the dog gets readjusted and you can work on the separation anxiety. Can you leave work at a reasonable time each day and continue working from home?
Renee
Why isn’t doggie daycare an option? it sounds like financial reasons? I’m a dog owner and a big law associate. If you’re a big law associate with a big law salary who’s committed to this dog, either doggie daycare is an option (financially) or you shouldn’t keep this dog (that said, I hope that DAILY doggie daycare isn’t required and there are lots of situations your dog can be happy with). I spend over $5k a year on dog walkers and sitters, and I knew this was necessary for my lifestyle before I got the dog. In my experience, people that rescue TEND to be less committed to their dogs financially and otherwise. Wish it wasn’t true for the rescue dogs’ sake. Sorry to be harsh, but if the reasons are financial, I think you should reevaluate – your dog deserves better and there are other people to take him if you can’t give him what he needs.
Novels About Ireland
SD is spending junior year abroad in Dublin. We are looking for a novel(s) set in Ireland to gift her. The only ones I can think of are Angela’s Ashes, ‘Tis and Finnegans Wake.
Suggestions?
SD is 19, from an Israeli-American family, raised in Southern California and at a small liberal arts college back East. She likes “Mad Men” and is interested in Public Relations and international politics.
TIA!
LilyB
Angela’s Ashes is one of my favorite novels and a timeless classic (you could also get her the movie to watch after she reads the book). I wouldn’t hesitate to gift her that, plus maybe something a little more upbeat/contemporary.
Anon
For upbeat and contemporary (although can have some dark themes), try Marian Keyes.
Maddie Ross
For upbeat and contemporary (although can have some dark themes), try Marian Keyes.
Anonymous
+1
The Commitments
And perhaps a collection of Irish myth and legends.
buffybot
This is maybe a bit odd since they all tend to involve murder and Bad Things, but I thought Tana French’s novels (In The Woods, Faithful Place, etc) were fantastic glimpses into modern Dublin. They’re all mysteries, but beautifully written and full of cultural observations about the effects of Ireland’s economic boom and bust in the last decade.
Cb
Yes, these are so good! I’d recommend them as well.
Anon
Get her Dubliners by James Joyce (not a novel but a collection of amazing short stories).
L in DC
+1
Anonymous
Why not Ulysses?
Anonymous
Any of the Nora Roberts romance trilogies set in Ireland. I think she has some – or may just keeps have Irish-Americans as main characters.
Blonde Lawyer
My mother loves the book Last of the Donkey Pilgrims. I have not yet read it.
Anonymous
Dublin, Edward Rutherford.
Novels About Ireland
Thank you all so much. These are wonderful. I really appreciate it.
Anonymous
Maeve Binchy’s novels are a little old-fashioned but good stories. Also Cecelia Ahern. A mix of relationships with a little supernatural thrown in.
SameSameNameName
i would recommend a series of books by Ross O’Carroll Kelly. They are extremely popular and very much give an idea of what it is like to live in Ireland. They are hilariously funny and Ross O’Carroll Kelly has very much become part of pop culture in Ireland. I have Irish friends who have emigrated and love to receive the books as gifts (and purchase for themselves) as it reminds them so much of home. Whilst Angela’s Ashes and Ulysses are fantastic novels they are a slog to read. Ross O’Carroll Kelly is a very easy read and something her new friends will also have read/ be reading whereas I can pretty much guarantee no one will have read any James Joyce unless forced to do so in school.
Eireann
For comedy, any book by Roddy Doyle. They are also quite dark in places and are a good representation of inner-city Dublin life.
Sarabeth
Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man is going to be about a thousand times more accessible than Finnegan’s Wake (depending on her personality, that could be good or bad. I would have loved someone to get me FW at 19, but I was a literature major). The Lost Child of Philomena Lee is nonfiction (like both of McCourt’s books), but gripping and gets at some of the less-romantic parts of the Irish national psyche.
Hungry!
I’d like to lose fifteenish pounds that I’ve picked up in the years since I graduated from law school, and I could use some advice. I’m trying to reduce my carb intake. But although I’m a meat eater, I never really learned how to cook meat — which means that at 5:00, I either spend too much money on takeout or go home to eat Cheez-Its in superhuman quantities. Either way, I’m sabotaging the Weight Watchers effort, which had gone pretty well at the beginning.
Any advice about either cooking for carnivorous dummies, or vegetarian meals that will fill me up, would be appreciated.
Anonymous
I would buy some cookbooks. And experiment with batch cooking on the weekends. Basically, cooking is something you have to practice to get better at, so you just need to dive in and do it, and recognize that some things will turn out great, others not so much.
Another alternative is the roasted chickens available at many grocery stores. Mix with salad greens and some vinaigrette, boom, healthy and fast dinner.
Wildkitten
If budget isn’t an issue, one of my colleagues orders these fresh pre-made meals: https://www.mypowersupply.com/ They look awesome but are out of my budget – but can be cheaper than take-out.
I’ve also taken some cooking classes at Sur la Table and learned a lot from them. Again, they’re pricey.
Quinoa is my lover
Ha, you and I are the same, including the desperate binging on cheez its. Anyways, outside of flailing at cooking meat, I am an ambassador for quinoa. Easy to cook, can be prepared in a variety of ways, very filling, keeps for days. I used it to replace pasta and the corresponding dreaded Wheat Bloat.
lsw
Flat-iron steaks are my new normal. Sear in the pan for 5 m on each side, then wrap in foil for 5 m. I slice and use for tacos. Or just eat it. It’s grrrreat!
Also, if you feel starving when you get home (which is me), maybe have a high protein snack right away before you cook. I do this to keep myself from constantly ordering Uncle Sam’s cheese steaks or scarfing down a whole bag of pita chips. My standards are a few slices of deli meat and/or a Babybel cheese. Another snack idea is these yogurt fruit “breakfast” popsicles that I just tried for the first time. They are really good and made with greek yogurt so they are filling. They are from thekitchn.com.
Anon
Do you have a crockpot? Shredded chicken made in the crockpot can be versatile. I like to make it either spicy (with chile powder, tequila, and jalepeno) or BBQ, where I literally just dump a bottle of BBQ sauce on the chicken and let it cook. Then I eat it on top of a salad, inside corn tortillas, etc.
It is also easy to make baked chicken or to cook chicken in a pan. I like to make a mustard-cream sauce or cook it with tomatoes, mushrooms and artichokes. If you look around on pinterest or just google you can find lots of easy recipes. Also, a meat thermometer really helps me cook meat correctly. If I try to just guess when it is done, I always overcook it. But with a meat thermometer it comes out perfect every time.
I also eat a lot of vegetarian dishes–relying on eggs, dairy, and beans as protein.
TBK
I wasn’t great at meat until I met my husband (who seriously would eat nothing but meat if he could). Here are a few very simple ways to cook lean cuts of meat:
– Split chicken breast (bone-in): Heat oven to 400. Sprinkle chicken breasts with dried tarragon and kosher salt. Bake on a baking sheet until thermometer reads 165. (It is seriously worth investing in a probe thermometer. You stick it in the meat and leave the display on the counter. An alarm goes off when the meat is done. Easy!)
– Pork tenderloin: Mix about 1/4 cup each of soy sauce and either a flavorless oil (like canola) or sesame seed oil, plus some fresh grated ginger (I just buy the jarred kind). Put the meat in a gallon zip lock bag and pour marinade over it. Add many good shakes of Chinese Five Spice powder and a good glop of hoisin sauce. Seal the bag and squoosh everything around until it’s well mixed. Open the bag just a little and squeeze out all the air. Put in a bowl and put into the fridge. Let marinate overnight if possible. Heat the oven to 400. Bake on a baking sheet until the thermometer reads 160.
– Greek turkey burgers: Put a package of ground turkey into a large mixing bowl. Add chopped red onions, kalamata olives, feta, and either mint or oregano (fresh or dried). Mix well with your hands. Heat a skillet over medium heat. Add a little oil to the pan. Form the meat into patties (make balls then flatten them with your palm). Cook in the skillet until a thermometer reads 180, turning as needed to keep from burning.
– Oven fried chicken: Heat the oven to 400. Put a bunch of chicken tenderloins into a bowl. Take some seasoned bread crumbs (panko are the best) and put them into a plate with a high rim, or a wide bowl. Take another smallish but wide bowl, break an egg into it and beat it well. Beat in a little milk. Set up your breading station, right to left: bowl of raw chicken, bowl of egg mixture, bowl of breadcrumbs, baking sheet. Take each tenderloin, dip it in the egg mixture, toss it in the breadcrumbs to coat, and lay it on the baking sheet. Bake the chicken to 165.
Clementine
First, if you know that at 5:00/when you walk in the door, you need food immediately (like me), have a plan.
Maybe a quick snack of carrot sticks + premeasured hummus or edamame that’s steamed will be something that can fill you up long enough to cook.
Otherwise, I find that having a few really easy to grab protein packed items really help me. On Sundays, I often will grill a bunch of chicken and then prep it in individual portions to have it ready to go. I often have cooked big pans of ground lean turkey with taco seasoning or chicken breasts in a crock pot with seasonings/salsa and eaten them over salads or with sides of steamed frozen veggies or quinoa or something.
Basics
In the same “prep ahead” vein, we keep the following in the fridge, which makes it really easy to assemble a hearty salad. I find that when all I have to do is “assemble” instead of “cook,” I tend to eat real food more readily:
– big tupperware of prepared quinoa
– big tupperware of steamed kale
– pre-washed spinach
– halved cherry tomotoes
– hard boiled eggs
– anything else you like in salads (chopped bell pepper, canned kidney or cannelini or garbanzo beans)
– jar of 40% vinegar of your choice/60% olive oil.
Place your selection in a large tupperware, add dressing, cover, shake –> instant salad.
New anon
Pioneer Woman just posted a chickpea curry recipe that looked fast and good. Lots of protein in the chickpeas, and I’d think you could add some veggies to it as well, or steam them to eat on the side; for some reason, zucchini is seeming like it would be a good fit.
anon a mouse
Do you like jerky? Sometimes eating a little bit of pork or turkey jerky (Krave is really good for both these) is the only thing that keeps me from being an insane hungry hungry hippo as soon as I walk in the door at home.
Blonde Lawyer
Fish and steak. My husband does most of our cooking and when he travels he leaves me recipes that a 5 year old could cook lest I burn down the house. Steak – preheat oven to 425. Put some olive oil on the steak with salt and pepper. I use a cast iron skillet but you could use a cookie sheet if you had to. Cook for 6 minutes one side and 5 minutes the other. Done. Fish – 400 degrees and anywhere from 15 to 20 minutes, no flipping. Get frozen veggies that steam in the microwave right in their bag. So easy.
Anonymous
getting a good food thermometer really helped me learn how to properly cook meat without getting sick or icked out.
I’d also suggest precooked stuff (meatballs, chicken breasts, rotisserie chicken if you really don’t want to “cook” to start out with. you can use that as a base, and just cook sides/veggies.
Wildkitten
Steam in a bag frozen vegetables are great with pre-cooked meats! I also like the quinoa rice blend that comes in a microwave bag from Costco.
Alice
I’ve posted this before, but my favorite is cooking a HUGE pot of turkey chili with black beans, bell peppers, and onions. I heat it up and add full fat Greek yogurt. Tons of protein, freezes well. If in the mood, I’ll eat it for any meal, including breakfast.
Renee
Slow cooker chicken, turkey (get it at trader joes) or pork dishes, meat loafs, etc. . Precooked sausages like bratwurst or fancy chicken sausages from Whole Foods take no time to heat up. Whole Foods counter of prepared foods – get just meat and combine with veggies and good carbs at home. Always have frozen meals at home in case you are too hungry to wait (Amy’s organic, Lean Cuisine, etc.). Sea food takes no time to cook but you want to pick it up fresh.
SF in House
I have a business trip to Singapore coming up. On previous trips to Asia (Vietnam and China), I have gotten clothes made to fit my hourglass shape. Is custom tailoring a “thing” in Singapore? If so, does anyone have any recommendations?
West Coast
I’m sure you might be able to find it if you really looked, but it is less common. I’m also jaded because I have always been very disappointed on tailors in China and Thailand to make anything that fits (busty hourglass) and is actually of decent quality.
Blonde Lawyer
My husband got pants made for him in Little India but they weren’t quite long enough and we didn’t have time to get them fixed. A bit disappointing but the experience was fun. The shop owner really wanted to make me a custom made sari. Since I really have no occasion to wear one, I declined. I’m sure he would have made me business pants too if I wanted.
Anonymous
Tailoring is possible in Singapore & HK, but suits are an iffy proposition if you’re just visiting. It takes a lot of time to find a skilled tailor and to sit for multiple fittings.
Alterations, though, are easy, fast, and cheap. On a short business trip, I think a better plan is to just buy some good quality clothes off the rack (or bring stuff you’ve bought in your home country) and take them to a tailor for alterations. You get the quality of a known brand, and get your stuff altered to fit you perfectly.
Also, tailors can copy items of clothing with better results than making something from scratch, so you could always bring some pants and dresses that you love from home and request a few copies.
AN
Bring something that fits, and get them to copy it. Singaporean ladies are usually super slim, flat chested and mostly petite. So your tailor likely will be best off replicating something you already have.
anon
How do you get motivated at work when you’re in a slump? I have about fifteen tabs of internet junk that’s like a siren song in the face of my actual work right now, as was the case yesterday.
Heather
Time to break out the productivity apps for your browser. :) I like productivity owl for google.
LinkedIn profile
I am in the process of updating my LinkedIn profile and thought of adding a summary at the top which details my experience, professional interests etc. This should be easy to figure out but I am also on the job market with an interview coming up soon. The job happens to be in Practice Area A in which I have a strong interest. But I also have a secondary interest in Practice Area B. I’m in academic research so it’s hard to go into the finer details in this post. I figure that as one applies for positions, those hiring may glance at one’s LinkedIn profile. What is the best way to convey different interests while at the same time showing that you have some type of career focus? Is it okay to convey some personality in the profile? Some examples I have looked at online have people listing interests such as marathon running, hiking etc.
Easterli
Would anyone care to share the names of any style/fashion/lifestyle magazines they find helpful in coming up with work attire ideas?
anon
I have a small bulletin board in my closet. I read several magazines. It’s not really about the magazines though. I can’t think of one in particular that I find extremely useful. I cut out anything I find useful and stick it on the board. For example, Lucky had a neat feature on colored tights and how to wear them with what shoes. This is still on the board.
Cher and Dionne
As if!