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Sales of note for 9.10.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Save up to 40% on new markdowns
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- White House Black Market – 30% off new arrivals
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And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
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- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
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- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Anon
HALP. I have a new employee who I am having so much trouble with. He ignores the dress code (says he “forgot” every time I point out that he is not dressed professionally enough – I have clearly explained the dress code at least 5 times and he has a written copy of it), he just assumes he knows how to do things when he doesn’t (I have told him a billion times to ask for help, but he always says he just doesn’t want to be a burden – I tell him he is not being a burden by asking for help), he interrupts when you are trying to explain things to him and says he understands (spoiler alert – he does not understand)…we have had him for 6 weeks. I don’t know how to get him to improve! Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Anon
Fire him! He’s clearly not willing to listen to you so I don’t see how you’re going to get him to improve.
Ellen
This schmoe sounds alot like Mason, who I used to manage until we fired him for not passing the bar and for haveing s-x on the conference room table with my secretary. Men these days seem so entitled and they look down on us women, even when we are their manager. I do not like cockey guys like that, and neither should anyone who has to work and manage them. Tell him that you will work with him until (i) he learns to do things right or (ii) 6 months from now, which ever comes first, and that if he does not shape up in 6 months, he will be shown the door. Once you are firm with him this way, if he does NOT shape up, he is on notice that he will be given the boot! YAY!!!
Vicky Austin
Is this his first job? He might be wildly insecure and wants to clarify that he Totally Knows Things!!!!1!
Can you test him? Explain the thing, get interrupted, say, “OK, show me how you do it, then.” Or, explain the thing, he says got it, say OK, then when it becomes apparent he doesn’t get it, say, “You told me you understood.”
Not sure about dress code – can you get HR involved?
Anon
Are you his manager? If so, you get him to improve by… managing him? Tell him explicitly that the dress code isn’t optional. Tell him when he’s done something wrong, point out that it’s because he didn’t listen to you when you gave him instruction, and go over it once more while he takes notes. Tell him every time he interrupts that questions are fine once you’re done but he isn’t to cut into you explaining a procedure or task. Tell him that these things are a part of his being a success in this role and that if he can’t meet these standards it will have consequences for his future in the company. Ask A Manager (askamanager dot com) is a great resource for how to have these conversations.
If you don’t manage him, I’d send the clear, calm and evidenced feedback to his manager (Archibald did x when I’d asked him to y and the impact on our shared project was z), put any resulting problems on their shoulders, and otherwise stay out of it – not your circus, not your monkeys.
LittleBigLaw
Written discipline may be appropriate here, especially for the dress code issue.
anon a mouse
Send him home if he does not meet the dress code and charge him leave for that time.
journo
+1 exactly. Send him home at his expense.
Senior Attorney
Yup.
Anon
Put him on a written performance improvement plan with concrete steps. Provide a written deadline. Document every violation. Then pull the trigger if he doesn’t improve. He may actually improve. I’ve personally experienced these working before (though most often the person quits or is fired )
Go for it
+1000
He’s not worth your time.
Anon
Oh come on yall! If the tables were turned and this was a young woman instead of a man, everyone would be advocating for the manager to help manage and guide him, not fire him. If he’s very junior, he literally may not know what to wear (or have the resources right now? maybe he’s saving money to buy more professional clothes and is embarrassed? he’s only gotten 2 or 3 paychecks at this point?) or how to act in an office. Be helpful. Assume positive intent. I was this junior person at one time (didn’t want to be a burden, etc.) and I’m sure almost everyone here was at one point too. Let’s be kind!
Anon
Oh god, I knew somebody was going to try to make this dumb argument. No, they wouldn’t. People who can’t follow directions after being told FIVE times are not worth the effort. Also sounds like OP needs to seriously work on her managing skills.
Walnut
Is he bringing a note book and taking notes when you’re giving him instructions? Ask him to do so and then repeatedly ask him “Are you writing this down?” and ask him to recap instructions in writing when he returns to his office.
Also, start getting everything in writing in case you need to put together a formal performance improvement plan.
Salt Lake City Moving?
Very late, but to the anon who was willing to give me some SLC reccs via email: burner ette 19 at g mail dot com (no spaces). Thank you!
Boden Ravello top
Does anyone know, is the Boden Ravello top a woven fabric or a knit/jersey fabric? (Website just says “63% viscose 37% silk.”) Thanks in advance!
Duchess
It’s woven. No stretch at all.
Boden Ravello top
Thanks, both!
anon a mouse
It’s woven.
Anonymous
Given all the retirement talk this morning, what is everyone’s target number for retirement? Plus any other info you’d like to include.
Mine as of right now – 2-2.5mil, 39 years old, single. When I graduated in 2005, I feel like common wisdom from those in their 40s-60s at the time was aim for $1 mil. Seems like that $1 mil has now stretched to 2 – ugh – inflation, healthcare costs etc.
nuqotw
2.5Mish but could go up / down depending on whether I will have a pension and our projected healthcare requirements. If we had to pay all of our current healthcare costs out of pocket w/o any health insurance, we’d need 12M in 2019 dollars to retire.
anon
Following with interest.
I thought 3 million was now the goal. And I’m nowhere near that despite saving and employee matching, and far more frugal living than most of my peers.
I know slow and steady wins this race, adn there just aren’t any real shortcuts, but not being terribly interested in my job it’s hard to accept the fact that I’ll be working for another decade at least.
I’m just a smidge older than you and single as well.
Small Firm IP Litigator
Our target is 2M in cash/investments, not counting our home, which we plan to sell on retirement (worth about 1M today, will own outright several years prior to retirement). We also plan to buy our retirement home 7-10 years pre-retirement and use it as a vacation home (what we have in mind is about 500k in today’s money, plan to pay cash or close to it). Early 40s now, planning to retire mid-50s.
anon a mouse
$1.5-2 million. DH will maybe have $1M (if he’s lucky, he started late!). I will have a pension and we expect to have a paid-for house of at least $1M that we will sell to move somewhere less expensive.
Anonymous
3.5-4M, 35 and married. This is a combined number and depends if we retire at 55 or 60.
Anon
I focus on what I can set aside each year, and think less about the total goal I’m working towards. The most I can do is to max out a 401k, with a match, and a Roth IRA – which I think is pretty great. Will provide over a million dollars, and I will have a paid off house that will probably be worth over a million at that time. If I need to go in to a nursing home and have spent down all my money, I’ll be relying on public assistance. And if public assistance goes away, I’ll be in the same boat as the vast majority of other seniors so … not going to worry about that.
Anon
+1. Honestly, if I’m super sick and have terrible quality of life and can’t afford treatment and somewhere to live because society has collapsed to the extent that there is no public assistance, that might just become the end of my life. It shouldn’t be that way, but in America today, it feels like a possibility.
Anon
I agree with this.
Anon
I agree. I also think that like maybe 2% or less of the country saves the way so many people here think you “need” to save. There is no way the other 98% person of the country isn’t going to demand the public assistance they need. I mean, I suppose this country could become a dictatorship or whatever, and then none of us really have any idea what the future will look like. But as long as we continue to be a democracy, there’s no way there’s going to be no Medicaid just because a few Big Law attorneys saved $10M for their retirement.
emeralds
Just want to say for the record that if I saved 100% of my salary, it would take me 20 years to save 1 million.
I am a frugal person and save 20% of my 50k income for retirement. Plus I have a hefty match—total savings work out to about 32% after the match. I have a six figure net worth and only cracked 50k in the last six months. But there is just no universe where I’m retiring with 2 million. That is just numerically unachievable for the large majority of Americans. ?♀️
emeralds
*50k in salary.
Anonymous
Same Emeralds, same! I earn a bit more than you, but could never save $4-5M even if I put 100% of my salary into retirement accounts. Those numbers might make sense for high-earners who want to spend their golden years jetsetting all over the world (although it’s certainly possible to enjoy a lot of travel without millions in the bank) but I don’t understand the argument that that much is necessary because you might need nursing care. If the overwhelming majority of people can’t and won’t achieve that, then it’s not necessary. Full stop.
Anon
+1 we max out 401(k)s and IRAs each year but don’t save beyond that. We are currently prioritizing a house fund and were previously prioritizing loan payments. We plan to own a home outright 15+ years before retirement. I understand the benefits of investing early but we also have other goals. We also have very high expenses now (young kids, live in VHCOL city, etc) so expect to have more cash to divert to this in the future.
Anon
+1 to saving what we can and not working towards a specific goal. I think it’s so hard to predict what you’ll “need.” If we die in our 70s, still living in our paid-off house, we could live comfortably on interest from the money we already have in the bank. If we get Alzheimer’s and need 24/7 nursing care for 10 years we would never be able to save enough and will have to rely on public assistance.
My husband and I each currently max our employer (Roth) 401(k), a Roth IRA and get a contribution from our employer. We feel like we’re saving well, especially relative to our incomes (which are low six figures combined) but we also know that none of us have a guaranteed retirement and we want to travel, eat out and generally enjoy our lives while we’re young and healthy too. I expect I’ll retire sometime between 55 and 65, and my husband will work until he dies or gets seriously ill (he absolutely loves his job and many people in his field don’t retire in the traditional sense). Full disclosure, when I retire depends on my parents health and whether or not I expect any inheritance; if they both died in a plane crash tomorrow I’d be super wealthy and would retire for sure in my 50s, but I’m well aware they may spend all their money on end-of-life-care. I doubt I would retire much before 65 unless I had already inherited a substantial amount of money at that point, just because I tend to be pretty risk-averse.
Anon
You have to consider how expensive it is where you will live and at what age you will retire. The numbers in a vacuum don’t mean much.
anon
I did the math; know that I made conservative assumptions- as do not want to be short.
For us, if retirement at 67 years old, then minimum $3.2 million.
My dream is to retire early, however that requires $4.4 million.
Key assumption: living to 100 (my grandmother is 97 and going strong).
Also assuming future spending will be consistent with current spending, just different buckets (e.g. healthcare) – based on my parents experience in retirement.
Social security will be means tested / taxed.
anon
Where do your male SO’s shop for casual clothing? DH has a birthday and Father’s Day coming up, and I’d like to find him a few new summer clothes for one of his gifts. (In case you’re wondering, he will not find this insulting.) He’s in his early ’40s and doesn’t follow trends at all. I’d call him a classic dresser, but not really full-on preppy, if that makes sense. I don’t even know what’s in style for dudes’ shoes, but he also needs some kind of leather sandal.
Disclaimer: I rarely shop for his clothing (neither does he), he takes care of his work wardrobe 100%, and I do not feel like this is an act of emotional labor. I know he wants a few new things for summer but doesn’t have much fashion sense, so picking something for him is part of the gift. I am not trying to change him or his fashion sense.
Sorry, given the tone of the posts over the past few days, it needed to be said.
Anonymous
Depending on price range for what you want clothing wise – JCrew, Banana, Gap, Uniqlo are all good for classic casual wear. Not to exciting but you can get stuff fitting every casual occasion.
Anon
I would suggest giving him a gift card to Nordstrom and an appointment with a personal shopper. They are generally really good and follow trends (without being trendy) in a way that will suit his style and taste.
nutella
Unsure of your husband’s size, but my husband loves Bonobos, Club Monaco, and N0rdstr0m. Trunk Club is often a bit better for men than women, so that’s an option. My husband loves to stock up on tees, henleys, casual shorts and casual pants, and polos. Men’s leather sandals are very European to me and/or for the extremely trendy Americans right now, but some classic white sneakers will do the trick (or boat shoes if he is on the preppier side).
Anonymous
My ex-husband loves Banana Republic and Nordstrom. Also, random finds at Marshalls/TJ Maxx.
Lyssa
My husband really likes Lucky. That and Banana Republic. Unfortunately, it rarely seems like there’s much else out there.
waffles
Brooks Brothers? It can skew classic or preppy. It’s my husband’s go-to.
Senior Attorney
If you’re willing to spend a little money, try getting him a trunk from Trunk Club. They have taken my sweet husband from Mid Market Department Store So So to Super On Point in his casual wear. And they do shoes as well as clothing.
.
Cole Haan usually has fisherman sandals. I also shop for my husband at Brooks Brothers, Tommy Bahama, and Ralph Lauren. Ike Behar has nice shirts
Anon
Trunk Club!
Frustrated
A question for the M&A attorneys here since it seems like there are a bunch of you. The professional services firm I work for is in the process of being acquired and it’s taking forever, and this is the first time in my career I’ve been through a deal like this. Discussions started in mid-2017. Closing was supposed to be complete by November 2018, then every single month since February, and now there’s no date but there is still a ton of deal-related work ongoing. Is it normal for the process to be taking so long? Is this deal probably falling through?
Some more info: It is not a very large transaction (about $40m). I’ve been informed that the deal is happening but am not updated on the daily developments. Financial due diligence just keeps stretching out, meaning the acquiring company is spending more time and money. I can think of a few potential causes of the delay–the acquiring company doesn’t trust the information we’re giving them, or they’re having trouble getting the financing, or my company isn’t being responsive. The partners are telling us “it’s the lawyers” fighting over minor terms, which I don’t buy for multiple reasons. I’m very annoyed at this point because it’s a huge distraction for the company. We’ve been stuck in this deal purgatory for many months. I just want it to happen or not happen so that we can all move on.
Anonymous
Not M&A attorney but former i-banker and now frequently m&a-adjacent. What you’re describing is not typical.
Equestrian attorney
M &A lawyer here. My old firm was almost acquired, it lasted about a year and then it fell apart. I have no advice because I left and went in-house (for other reasons, but this didn’t help). But yes, as someone who has been on the other side a lot, deals can take a while and almost always take longer than expected. It doesn’t necessarily mean the deal is falling apart, but it usually means they have hit some sort of snag – something came up in DD, there’s a financing issue, or someone changed their mind somewhere – leadership can be surprisingly fickle and things like economic downturns, new legislation or major industry movements affect deals all the time. They might overcome this and it might still go forward, or it might fall apart. “It’s the lawyers fighting over minor terms” is the universal excuse of leaders everywhere. Trust me, I don’t enjoy delaying things unduly – if we are fighting about something, it’s usually pretty material, and more often than not the holdup is actually operational/financial, and we are waiting for a solution that we can build into the transactional documents.
Anon
I’m not familiar with this kind of deal specifically, but you’re right not to believe the “it’s the lawyers” excuse. My experience in biglaw has been that lawyers never, ever run the ship. My guess would be that this deal is more likely than most to fall apart.
Anonymous
I bought this skirt after a recommendation here the other day but I need styling tips! What else should I wear with it?
https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/j-crew-rainbow-stripe-pull-on-flare-skirt/5268116
Rainbow Hair
Eee it’s so cute! What are you wearing it for? I’d probably just wear a little black tank with it.
Jeffiner
A black or white tank. A denim shirt if the weather is cooler. A black or white graphic tee that has one of the skirt’s colors in the graphic would be cute. On your feet, either sandals or sneakers.
Seeking June Travel
TW (MC) and apologies if this has been asked recently. I am looking for travel reccs for the last week of this month (June – yes, it is short notice). Able to fly out of Chicago. Did a NEUS road trip in the fall already so ideally not that again. Open to anywhere with: no zika, warm weather but not sweltering (e.g., not Florida/SEUS), good food, hiking options (don’t need anything intense – some quiet lakes and parks; mountains preferred), good for a couple recovering from a MC 3 months ago (no breaks since then). Not opposed to flying anywhere (we’re near a major airport). Looking for less than $5K budget incl air/car, hotels, food, etc. Wildly varying ideas: Hawaii, California, London, Montreal, Michigan road trip (tricky part finding affordable B&Bs with availability so late). Just need to escape my regular life for a few days. Thank you for any travel guidance or sharing similar trips you’ve taken to help narrow down options!
Anonymous
Santa Fe? Admittedly quite warm in the day but not humid, cool evenings, plenty to do.
Anonymous
Oh also Santa Barbara. Plenty to do, great wine, good hiking, lovely chill vibe.
anon.
This recently came up on the board, but Santa Fe could work for you for this trip. Easy drive from ABQ.
thehungryaccountant
If you’ve never been- Vancouver, BC! Its a fun city with a wide variety of hiking/biking options and a foodie scene. Also, definitely no Zika that far north.
BabyAssociate
What about Vancouver?
Cat
Jackson Hole?
anony
I second Jackson Hole! It’s absolutely gorgeous.
Equestrian attorney
I’m biased but would vote Montreal! The US to Canadian conversion rate makes it very cheap. Easy flight from Chicago, great food, fun city stuff, and some great hiking options less than 2 hours away including lots of lakes and small mountains (more like hills, but pretty).
Anon
Jenner, California.
Patricia Gardiner
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Vancouver would be my vote.
Inspired By Hermione
If you’re still checking, Seattle weather is more or less perfect weather in June most years. And it’s not smoky and just generally a great time to come here!
Anon CPA
Traverse City, Michigan
Seeking June Travel
Thank you, everyone, for the travel recs! These will give me plenty of options to research. Really appreciate your help!
Anon
For everyone talking about the HPV vaccine, is there any truth to the FB stories that the vaccine was not tested for effects on fertility and that the miscarriage and infertility rate is considerably higher for people who have had it?
Personally, I think the infertility rate is going up for totally unrelated reasons and since most young women have had the vaccine it is an easy scape goat.
Anon
That sounds like nonsense and I would not believe it until I saw a peer-reviewed study (or ideally, several) that say that.
Anonymous
No. Obviously not. Why would you even ask this question here? Do better about critical reading and thought.
Anon
+1
Anon
The infertility rate was increasing LONG before the vaccine existed, much less came into common usage.
Anon
I’m really skeptical of that if for no other reason than I don’t think the vaccine really came into common usage until 5-10 years ago (first went on the market in 2006) and was primarily given to teen and early 20-something girls, who are likely just starting to try for babies now. Seems like even if it did cause miscarriages or infertility, it would be too early to have data that shows that.
Anon Lawyer
If you google, you find scientific studies on it. But, I’d want to know whether they control for socioeconomics – if mostly middle and upper class girls got the vaccine, they’re more likely to delay pregnancy deliberately as well.
Anon
But what do the studies actually say? I googled this and the first result is “Study: HPV Vaccine Doesn’t Hurt Girls’ Fertility – WebMD” so I don’t know that it really matters whether or not they control for socioeconomics if the conclusion is that the vaccine has no effect on fertility.
Anon Lawyer
I don’t want to link because I’ll be in moderation forever but there was one saying that many fewer women who had the vaccine had children than women who hadn’t – but that screams “different life choices” to me.
Anon
Anon Lawyer – were the sample groups they were comparing similar? If the group without the vaccine was older (since I think the HVP vaccine only came out like 8 years ago), that is in no way surprising that they were more likely to have children. Similarly, if the group without the vaccine were very religious (because it didn’t match their “values” and their parents just knew they were not going to garden without besides their husband), that is also not surprising since very religious people tend to have more children. I would need a lot more info because I would trust that study
LaurenB
And even if it did, so what? Better infertile from the shot (theoretically speaking, since this isn’t the case) and not dead from cancer, than fertile and then dying from cancer.
The HPV vaccine is like the polio vaccine insofar as it is a MAJOR public health success story.
Anon
@LaurenB, right?? I feel the same way about the autism/MMR thing too. You would rather your kid be dead than autistic? I would 1 billion percent take my child with any form of special needs or physical or intellectual disability (as long as she wasn’t suffering greatly) versus her passing away. I can’t believe any parent would feel differently but I guess some do.
Another anon
I run a research lab studying HPV. There is NO truth to this report or others like it.
Nesprin
The exact opposite- human papilloma virus is associated with infertility, and thus the vaccine should increase fertility.
Anon
Facebook posts aren’t credible sources of information, does it link to a credible study. If it does, you can post the study name so that we can look it up.
LaurenB
Nope. That’s the kind of thing the evangelicals who don’t approve of the HPV vaccine because it “encourages young girls to have Teh Sex instead of saving themselves for their husbands” would want you to believe. There is not one shred of scientific data to this assertion.
Anon
I stopped reading at “FB stories” and you should too.
clinical researcher
Hi – I was actually a local research assistant for this study when it came out, which was a long time ago. To the best of my recollection of the consent and follow up – we were not looking at fertility for the primary outcome. If we had looked at fertility, we would still be following these women. Also, this vaccine was commercially available in Europe before clearing the FDA here. I am unsure if the European trials tracked fertility or if there is similar fertility decline across the atlantic.
IMO there are a ton of factors that could be related to fertility decline – correlation is not causation