Coffee Break: Finna Pointy Toe Derby

There's a lot of good stuff in the Nordstrom Fall Sale — like this pointy toe derby from Marc Fisher. I especially like it in the leopard print, and I think it would look really cute with ankle-length pants, but that's me. Note that they call this a “gracefully pointed toe,” but if you're someone with foot problems, such as bunions, it will likely feel like a very pointed toe and is probably not for you. But if you like this really sleek look and are able to wear it comfortably, this is a great option. The shoe is highly rated at Nordstrom so far and is on sale for $95.96–$104.96, down from $159.95–$174.95. Zappos has it, too, but without a discount. Besides the leopard print calf hair pictured, it comes in black leather and black suede, and it's available in sizes 5–11 with a good number of them still in stock. Finna Pointy Toe Derby This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!

Sales of note for 12.2.24 (Happy Cyber Monday!! See our full sale listing here!)

And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!

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70 Comments

  1. I’m in my mid-30s and am about 20 lbs over the BMI recommendation for my height (5’2). However, I love my hip curves and I finally have cleavage. I get comments often by men about how weird it is that I am a very pale white person but I’m shaped like a woman of color (which is its own set of part patriarchy, part racism). That said, it’s pretty common that my friends who are in their 50s+ who are white will often talk about weight loss where my friends in their 50s+ who are women of color either don’t discuss that or they tell me I look skinny, so maybe there is a racial component. As for my own opinion of my body, sometimes I wish I had a flatter stomach but most times I’m pretty good with my body when I’m naked, I just struggle with finding clothes that fit short people and except when I’m noticing when something makes me feel like I look pregnant or something.

    Some days, I debate the idea of liposuction for that one spot, other days I think this is more about what society expects women to look like. Where do you draw the line between being happy with your body because eff patriarchal body standards and when do you see it as “I should do something about this” ?

    1. I have always been hippy and was more so post-partum. I am white. The only jeans I could find that fit were, based on the wording of the tags, probably not marketed to white people. Which wasn’t a problem, just interesting. If it fits, it fits.

      I will say that my sense with teens is that there is a lot less self-esteem among the white teens I see who aspire to be a size 00, but with T2 diabetes rates on the rise, I think health be the most important thing. Long-term, you can be healthy and beautiful as a 00 or a 18, depending on height, frame, etc., but if you have T2 diabetes, that is a really, really hard life.

      1. This.

        I’m 15lbs more than when I’m ‘hottest’ but I can run 10km faster than I ever have before and lift twice as much as when I was in my 20s so I’m good with it.

        For me, fitness makes a much bigger impact on how I feel about my body vs a number on ths scale.

    2. This is racist. I would say FOOEY to men who objectivize you because of your curves. Men look at me and say similar things b/c of my boobies and tuchus. Some men say that they want to do stuff with them right to my face, and I cannot write here what they want to do b/c it is so gross. You are a woman and who cares what people think? If you are happy with yourself, that is all that matters. I would not do anything to change what you look like to please other people. You do not say if you are married or what your boyfriend says, but at this point, you, like me, are in our mid 30’s and we do not have to explain anyting to anybody. Men just love to control us, or at least pretend they care until they get what they want (P in V s-x). But that is not what we live for. We want a relationship with a guy who will be there irregardless of the size of our boobies and tuchus. My dad says to ignore men who do not respect us for our minds, so I do! YAY!!!

    3. For me, it tends to come down to how often I’m thinking about the thing, or what other impacts it is having on my health/self-esteem/etc. I had a genetic defect that could be corrected by plastic surgery, which I only recently corrected. The actual defect didn’t bother me – I was happy with my body and looks regardless – but eventually I realized that I was spending a lot of time thinking/dealing with it in regards to getting clothes to fit correctly, particularly at work. And it wasn’t until after I got it corrected that I realized just how much time I really had been spending having to work around it. I still wouldn’t have fixed it just for aesthetic reasons, but I’m glad now because it’s just not something I have to think about. I recognize that’s a different scenario, but I think if you like the way you look and feel, then I’m firmly in the eff patriarchal body standards camp. Plus, I’d rather spend my time and energy shopping for clothes I love that fit my current body than miserably dieting/exercising/whatever to achieve a body I don’t necessarily even want!

    4. You know, I just realized/remembered the same thing happens to me. When I’m slim (for me, that’s a size 8), I get attention from white men. When I’m heavier (a size 12-14 for me), I get attention from black men. (I’m mixed.) I’m definitely curvy with an hourglass shape.

      For me, I’m happy with my body when I feel good. For me, that’s at a size 10. Size 8 is great, but not sustainable for me. Size 14 makes me feel uncomfortable in my own skin.

    5. I’m a N. European mix, but fuller hips and thighs run in my family. When I weighed about 100 pounds my pants would have a large gap in the waist. I used to order many of my clothes from Spiegal catalogs that marketed to African-American women. “Curvy” doesn’t always meet my body type. Even though I strive to be healthy I know that short of surgery I will always have a pear shape.

  2. Fun afternoon question: Does anyone have suggestions for a kit or DIY at-home escape room or mystery role-play that is cute and not scary, for a group of 12- and 13-year-old girls and boys at a birthday party? I have found some “escape room in a box” and “mystery in a box” kits, but they all involve werewolves or murder or other gruesome or scary themes the birthday girl doesn’t like. She would prefer a theme such as spies (but not murderous ones), outer space (but not with scary aliens), or unicorns. My searches are coming up empty.

    Or do you have other ideas for party entertainment suitable for a small indoor space with tweens who still don’t seem to have the patience to sit still and watch a movie? Previous attempts at less structured gatherings where we just leave the kids in a room with a stack of pizzas, the remote control, and a bunch of board games have been unsuccessful. Bonus points if the birthday girl can lead the activities herself so that mom can spend the entire party in another room watching The Crown with noise-cancelling headphones.

    1. Spies made me think of the card game Coup, which is super thinky and strategy-y and would probably be very engaging for a group this age as long as they had a handle on the rules (I have 2 degrees and still sort of scratch my head trying to play it sometimes). There is the option to “assassinate” other players though, so it may not be exactly what you’re looking for.

      Also, I recognize that it may not be typical, but at that age I LOVED pictionary.

    2. What about having them make mini pizzas, taking turns adding songs to a playlist that’s on while they prep and bake their pizzas, and baking and decorating cookies or cupcakes or something edible… the prep might slow down the making process or they could actually bake the cupcakes or a cake. Another option might be something like a bunch of craft kits from a craft store where they could make a stepping stone or display stone or some other craft? The alternative is to tell your kid to come up with a bunch of ideas from other parties and thoughts and then you veto the ones that aren’t okay. Or one of the dance party games for a game system or renting a karaoke machine? Too bad it has to be indoors, tie dye or something messier could have been fun for them!

      1. Check out Freeform Murder Mystery Games. They do unstructured murder mysteries sorted by size of group and age. They have at least a few kid friendly ones like Wild West, Hollywood, etc.

    3. We did a Clue party for my daughter that might be what you’re looking for. Basically, we turned our entire downstairs of the house into a clue game. We had the standard “weapons” (jump rope for a rope, water gun for the revolver, lead pipe for the pipe) the actual rooms (kitchen, living room, sunroom), and people. We assigned the kids to color teams and I found hats and boas at the Dollar Tree in about six colors. I then made cards for each weapon, each room and each color/person. I also made clue sheets that reflected our names. After dinner, the kids played the Clue game, moving from room to room. It was pretty cool for about an hour. After that (as is the case for the real game, I think), they got a little bored, so maybe you could find a way to speed it up. For the dinner, we had a really fun time with mystery items on the menu. Things like “nose tickler” for sparkling grape juice, “sneeze danger” for meatballs, “stab in the dark” for knife, “mouse droppings” for grated cheese, “fido’s trick” for roll. The kids got to select four items for each course and then we went back in the kitchen and brought out what they’d ordered. So they might get a roll, a spoon, grape juice and grapes. Next course they might get spaghetti, a fork, mandarin oranges and a napkin. Etc. By the end, they got the whole meal and all utensils. They thought it was a hoot. My husband, parents and I dressed up in black and white like waiters. We also did a mystery invite that was written like the clue intro, printed backwards. Definitely some work, but memorable.

    4. Maybe diy unicorn headbands, make slime, if you search sleepover activities you can find lots of stuff target sells sleepover in a box. Speak out, saying things and Pictionary are good for this age. Ice and decorate cookies as an activity.

  3. I’m in my middle/late 30s and between being short and still being young-ish, I am often guessed to be in my mid 20s. I’ve never cared either way, but I’m starting to notice tiny lines under my eyes. I’ve started using eye balm because a friend gave me an extra that she had but should I be doing something else or something more? I’ve never thought myself to be someone who would worry or care about this and I know I can’t freeze time but are there things I should be doing not to become someone who is 50 and looks 90?

      1. this question gets asked at least once a week, and I dont say that with snark, just suggesting that if you are not a regular reader, you take a look at previous threads for some great suggestions. But, yes, middle to late thirties, you’re going to have some lines or face changes, even if you think you look mid-twenties. Sunscreen, prescription Retin-A, Botox are the go-tos.

    1. Sunscreen every day, drink plenty of water, don’t smoke, get enough sleep, and hope you’ve got good genes.

    2. Sunscreen, moisturizer, eye balm/cream. Maybe get a facial and use that time with the esthetician to learn more about your skin type.
      Same with the drinking water, sleep, avoid prolonged periods of stress.
      I’m similar age/young looking/face starting to change and it is weird. I’ve had to shift my mental image of myself along with updating my skincare routine. With the extra attention, my skin quality has overall improved, even as I get smile lines that I didn’t have 2 years ago.

  4. Admittedly I am a suburban person at heart but it hasn’t worked out that way as most jobs in my industry are in NYC, DC, SF types of cities. So I deal with city life and all that comes with it. Lately there’s been a noticeable uptick of homeless folks in my area in one of the above cities. I’m sure some of you ladies deal with it to. What are your views on grabbing food in places where you see homeless people also grab food? Think a serve yourself place – Pret/ABP etc? Fine or do you start to avoid those places?

    1. I go to those places because I like them regardless of who else is eating there. The only thing I change is, if something is on sale like BOGO or something free for buying what I would already buy or there is extra when I’m done eating, I will offer it to someone who is obviously in need. Also, instead of taking winter clothes to a thrift store, I keep them in my car so I can offer them since I know I’m fairly frequently going somewhere where I will cross paths with folks who may need them.

    2. Can we NOT with this repeat tr0ll who hates homeless people again please.

      What do you want to hear, I’m afraid I’ll get cholera so I don’t go within 20 feet? It’s not “fine,” they should be banned from “grabbing food” at restaurants clean rich white ladies are allowed to go into? Mandatory delousing prior to entry? You say “grabbing” food– interesting verb choice. I assume they’re buying food, or someone is buying it for them? Or do you think they’re stealing it? If the former, do you think they do not have the right to be customers there? Why or why not? Or, do you mean grabbing it out of the trash can? Because if that’s the case, I have no idea how you can feel anything other than heartbreak and empathy and gratefulness that you and your loved ones are not in that position. “There but for the grace of god go I.”

      1. Huh? Haven’t seen this topic before so I don’t get your rant. I assume people buy for them. My very white, very rich managing director boss – when a homeless person asks for $ which is often in SF, he will say – I’ll buy you a sandwich. The person then goes into the store with boss to get what they want because boss doesn’t think they should just be forced to eat what he picks for them (which I agree with).

        1. Like, huh? Someone posts here repeatedly about how she/he hates seeing homeless people, how irritating it is they’re allowed in public, what we think about stores like starbucks that welcome them (I paraphrase). This is not a *rant,* I am asking you to stop being a jerk. I truly think you need to do some self-examination as to why you’re asking if it’s *okay that homeless people are allowed to act like other members of society and go into places of business to purchase food.* Seriously. Think about that.

          1. I think you are ranting, but it’s also at least the third thread recently about this topic, so I’d rant with you if I weren’t tired.

    3. Why is this even a problem to you? If they are not actively bothering you or anyone, just either leave them alone if you do not wish to buy something for them. I’m not going to avoid Pret a Manger/Panera/Chipotle/whatever just because there are “more homeless people.” Unless you think homeless people don’t have a right to be in public spaces? Or you think store managers should kick them out? Or, you’re afraid of homeless people?

      If they aren’t bothering me, then I just buy my food, and eat it either at the restaurant or take it to the office. Where I eat my food is due to my workload, not due to the presence of homeless people.

      @anon at 3:01 – I think I saw this same exact question come up last week or the week before

    4. I live in a big city which is experiencing a pretty recent, pretty dramatic uptick in homelessness. For about the last 15 years, I’ve attended church in a place known locally as “the home of the homeless.” While my exurban/suburban upbringing conditioned me to be very “muttering homeless guy”=DANGER-DANGER-DANGER, my actual experience has led me to act in a different way. Unless someone is loudly raving or blocking a door in a store or cafe, I tend to give them a wide berth but don’t worry about my personal safety. I’ve also noticed that if I have my kids with me, I tend to get fewer (or at least less hostile) requests for money.

      That said, I am sort of hyperaware at gas stations, and have definitely screamed at a guy or two who startled me when I was pumping gas. But I still do pump gas at night / go to the ATM at night if I’m out of cash / go to the movies alone.

      While most of the homeless women I’ve encountered haven’t made me feel unsafe, more than a few were pretty brazen about trying to steal things (at church) or take stuff out of my bag/purse.

  5. I went through some severe depression about 5 years ago due to a major loss, and I took medication and went to therapy. I haven’t been on medication (Zoloft) for about 3 years. Lately, I have no interest or motivation. I get home and just sit in the car because I don’t even want to go inside. I am producing very little at work, which makes me even less motivated as I now have a long list of tasks to do. Could this be depression? Nothing has really prompted it. It is nowhere near what I experienced before, which was a lot of negative thoughts and sadness. Is it worth talking to my doctor about Zoloft again? I feel kind of silly, but I need to do something.

    1. Yes, it sounds like depression. Depression isn’t always situational – it can be endogenous.

    2. Sure. Might be depression, which for some people doesn’t have a precipitating event or cause other than genetics, could be seasonal depression, might be a nutritional deficiency like anemia or low D, might be low testosterone, could be any number of things that a conversation with your doctor would probably help you figure out. I

      t’s good that you aren’t so depressed that you still feel like you have agency. I would act on that sooner rather than later. I hope you feel better soon!

  6. I have a bunch of clothes that I like but a lot of pieces misfit in different ways since pregnancy #2. I’m 15 months postpartum and my weight and shape have stabilized. I’m tired of feeling like a slob because my clothes hang funny. I think have two basic choices:

    (1) Pay a bunch of money to have my existing clothes tailored to my new shape, which I am pretty sure is possible.
    (2) Pay a bunch of money for new clothes and donate the ones that don’t fit anymore.

    I’d like to do (1) because at least then the fabrics and styles are ones I already have / like / am comfortable in but have no idea how to go about it. Is it really expensive? How does one find a tailor and have confidence that the clothes will fit / look right at the end?

    1. Whether the tailoring will look right or be expensive depends on what kind of changes are needed. What changes are you planning on having made? Is the clothing lined?

      1. Work clothes, some lined, some not. It’s all over the place in terms of changes but the general theme is things that are too loose because I bought them when I was past the point of being able to wear maternity clothes but still substantially larger than my normal size.

        1. Taking in side seams is fairly easy, as is taking in a waistband. So, skirts will be the easiest to fix, and tailored blazers will be hardest (the shoulder/sleeve area will have to be remade).

    2. I don’t think this is an either/or. Do both. Cost totally depends on what needs to be done but it’s likely cheaper to alter than replace if the fabrics and pieces are high-quality and are in good shape in the first place. Ask around for recommendations to a good local tailor – ask co-workers, put it out on Nextdoor, search online for local reviews. Take your stuff into one, explain the situation, and that you’re budget conscious as you’re trying to revive the wardrobe. Ask them what will be easiest to alter. They should have you try the items on so they see what’s needed and can mark/pin, and walk you through what’s possible and the costs. A good tailor will occasionally tell you no and explain why an alteration may not be possible. My tailor usually has me try on when I pick it up, and I guess he hasn’t ever charged me for a fix if they got it wrong, but that’s a question you can ask. If you’re worried about it, call them ahead of time and ask about their policies. Once you’ve got your alterations sorted out, see what holes there are and fill with new items.

    3. This is probably going to be on a piece by piece basis. Most tailors will be pretty good about telling you if the alterations will look right or not. My tip though would be to make sure that you really really like the piece of clothing before going through with the alterations. I went down a size recently, and all of my occasion dresses were a size bigger. I had all of them taken in, then realized that several of them just either aren’t in style or are too “young.” So, now I’ve had them altered and will have trouble selling them, etc., etc. and probably won’t wear them.

    4. I’d take a few favorite pieces to a tailor, ask if they think x, y or z can be fixed. They are usually no-nonsense.

      To find a tailor, ask at the local Talbots or Brooks Brothers store for references. Also, Nordstroms usually tailors clothes even if they weren’t purchased there. They have great tailors, IME.

  7. My SO would like a cigar lighter for Christmas – does anyone know if any brands are better than others? I know nothing of cigars. Thanks!

    1. Xikar is a good brand for cigar stuff, especially their cutters. My understanding is that the lighters for cigars have much stronger/hotter flames and a more powerful flame than what you’d find for a typical lighter for getting the cigar to light evenly. Many seem to be lighters that you refill yourself with butane. My husband actually has found that a small kitchen torch (what you’d use for creme brulee) works really well for him.

  8. Just had a phone interview with a candidate who showed up 5 min late and then talked for 15 min without pausing. And then, midstream, he said, “I feel like I’m talking a lot, please feel free to chime in!”

    If you feel like you’re talking a lot, just stop talking! Don’t tell me that I have to interrupt you in order to get a word in edgewise! Ugh, the whole conversation was pretty off-putting but for whatever reason, “feel free to chime in” really rubbed me the wrong way. I’m conducting your interview – I don’t need your permission to “chime in”. I just need you to pause to take a breath.

    1. I had the flip of this situation – the interviewer chattered on and on. I tried to interject when he would pause to take a breath. A couple times he said said, I feel like I’m talking a lot, and I was like I’m happy to chat about why I think I’m great for this position!, but then he just kept on….

  9. Do places like Goodwill and Salvation Army take bras? I have a lot that are no longer my size/style and some of them are barely worn. I’m throwing a bunch in the wash this weekend, just in case. I hate to throw them away!

    1. Not sure about those places specifically, but I know that they are definitely a need for homeless shelters in my area.

    2. I think not because people often don’t buy used bras.

      Womens shelters in my area often accept them.

    3. They do, but your best bet is probably to take them to a women’s shelter (call a hospital and ask, often shelters don’t advertise their location and their donations occur somewhere, in order to keep abused women safe from being found) or to a store that helps women to dress for interviews if they’re of good quality!

      1. +1. Also, if there is a Soma near you, they have a bra donation program. check their website for details.

        1. Ooooh, that’s a great idea! I need to go to Soma and be refitted. Most of the donations are VS bras and don’t work for me. I am in need of a smaller band and larger cup.

      2. Soma will accept donated bras and they work with women’s shelters to distribute them to those in need.

    4. I will just throw them in a larger bag of clothing destined for goodwill, and I figure if they don’t want em, they’ll dispose of them — their call.

    5. There is an organization out of Silver Spring, MD called I Support the Girls, that takes old bras and donates them to homeless shelters or women in transitional situations.

  10. Earlier posts have me thinking about the aging process now too!

    We’ve all seen women who get so “fixed” that they don’t look like themselves (or like humans, like the so called cat lady). That’s always what I think about when I consider the idea of botox or anti-aging nips or tucks or whathaveyou.

    How do you decide what is aging gracefully but slowing down the process versus risking tons of money and medical complications for something that won’t look natural? Would your decision on this be different if your income was different?

    1. I would probably have started on Botox by now if it was $40 and not $400. I’m okay with most of my wrinkles, but the ones between my eyebrows are due to me getting angry/stressed, and I don’t like seeing the reminder of those feelings. I feel perfectly content with my smile lines and crow’s feet.

      I have started using tretinoin and that seems to be making a slight difference. Time will tell.

  11. Sorry if this has been covered but recs on where to donate (money) for Ca wildfires? I know people always say Red Cross but I’d like it to go someplace where it gets into people’s hands quick for immediate needs not for overhead or some bureaucratic process. Like for hurricane Harvey, I feel like a Houston Texans football player ran a fund and his team was literally rolling out trucks of goods etc in one night. Here I’m thinking of the people who just made it out – they may have the clothes they’re wearing and maybe their car. Sure they’ll eventually file insurance claims etc but to do that you at least need to be staying in a hotel with a phone (since not everyone has family) bc you can’t sleep in a car for more than 1-2 nights plus Insurance needs to be able to reach you; need to buy clothes etc.

    1. To be fair, that well funded pre-existing beauracracy is a big part of what allows the Red Cross to be ready for emergencies as soon as they occur. Not saying you have to donate, just making a logical point.

      1. Yup, I work in disaster relief for the government and they’re one of our biggest partners for a reason!

  12. How do you decide where to give and where to donate time?

    I am trying to increase how much I give to charity, but I’m not sure if I should give a little to a lot of places or one big check to 1-2 places. I care about so many causes that it’s hard to narrow it down!

    On a related note, what’s one place you give to or donate time to that you think is seriously underrated and could deserve some more exposure?

    1. I pledge a small monthly contribution to 4-5 nonprofits that vary in their goals/focuses but that are personally important values for me (reproductive rights, free press, ending mass incarceration). I’ve heard secondhand that organizations like monthly contributions because it helps them plan better although I have no idea if that’s true. I donate to multiple orgs kind of selfishly because I didn’t want to choose between them.

      I’ll throw out a couple – National Advocates for Pregnant Women and Equal Justice Initiative. I’ve had exposure to both of their directors and have been very impressed with their goals and methods.

    2. Our local United Way supports something like 50 local organizations through their community grants. There is an application and interview/vetting process that the organizations go through for the grants. If you are looking for a one-stop donation place and you don’t want to pick your favorite cause, this is one option.

    3. transkids purple rainbow foundation doesn’t get enough attention, neither does animal tracks in los angeles

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