Wednesday’s TPS Report: Jacquard Dress With Contrast Bodice

186 Comments

1. Can anyone recommend a good bakery in Chicago? I am visiting with my girlfriend for her birthday and wanted to have a cake made. It’s just the two of us so a small cake will be fine. We are staying on Magnificent Mile. FWIW I like the look of cakes that are done with buttercream but it is smoothed out to look like fondant (if that makes sense). Delivery or close location will be key. Thanks!!

   1. I think it’s quite stereotypical but I loved Magnolia’s when I was visiting. As someone who is a bit fussy about my cake, I was pretty impressed.

   2. I would put candles in an Ann Sather cinnamon roll.

      1. And walk over to greek town for some baklava

   3. +1 to Magnolia, it’s certainly pricey but you’re guaranteed a great cake.

   4. sugar bliss, but not sure if it’s far.

   5. Not sure if they deliver, and it’s not walkable, but Sweet Mandy B’s is amazing!

2. My hair has been awfully frizzy lately, despite no change in my haircare regimen. Usually when it’s dry out, I just use argan oil and that takes care of the problem, but not so much lately. if I put more oil on, it gets too oily. Any suggestions? I have long hair with ringlet curls

   1. No advice, but can I have your hair? long ringlet curls sound fantastic.

      1. :) people randomly touch it a lot, though, which is less fantastic

         1. Yeahhh… that does not sound fun. Bummer! Hazards of beauty I guess!

            1. Nope. Not okay.

   2. I have the same problem, so I’ll be watching this to see how others respond. I’m thinking it has to do with the change in weather, because argan oil alone isn’t enough. I find that my curls don’t channel Miss Frizzle as much when I layer product–I use a serum and then a curl cream, both Bumble & Bumble.

   3. I’d add in a deep conditioner (focus on the ends, not the roots) one a week. If that seems to help but not eliminate maybe up to 2x a week. Usually frizz results from a significant lack of moisture, so deep conditioner and drink a lot more water than normal (plus keep your skin well hydrated too).

   4. Similar hair texture, and I can’t do oil because it just looks greasy. I use Carol’s Daughter Hair Milk (lite) as a leave-in moisturizer after washing. I also use a hydrating masque in the shower and Lush R&B on the lengths, very sparingly, between washes.

   5. I don’t have your hair type, but I will do one of two things when my hair gets fussy or frizzy. I either (1) wet it and put on coconut oil or some hair mask for 30 minutes before showering like normal or (2) put much more than my normal hair oil just on the ends of my hair — still dry — so that it looks disgustingly oily from the ears down. I don’t leave this in for as long, just as long as it takes me to get ready for the shower, so 2 minutes, then I shower and condition like normal and use the appropriate amount of hair oil after while drying it.

   6. I think there are usually a couple reasons for frizzy hair (esp with curls). It’s either to dry (and the hair follicle is all frazzled and open), which is when moisturizing the heck out of it and using hair oil helps.

      But then there’s humidity, where curly hair is curling just fine, but may need a bit of structure to help it calm down and curl together (instead of each.single.hair on it’s own). Maybe a mousse or cream to give the hair a little hold or weight?

3. (Preface – I don’t work for Boden)

   I have two of these dresses from last year and just ordered a third. They are great! And much less high-waisted than a lot of Boden dresses I’ve tried.

   http://www.bodenusa.com/en-US/Womens-Dresses/Work/WH704/Womens-Chic-Tweed-Shift.html

   1. It is on sale too. How is the fabric? I get that you love it but is it soft/lined or is it that more stiff/itchy tweed. I have very sensitive skin so I don’t like anything itchy/scratchy.

      1. +1. I tried a tweed Boden skirt but it was still itchy even though the lining.

      2. I haven’t found it to be itchy at all, but my skin is not very sensitive so I’m not sure how helpful my response will be to you :) As far as the fabric, I haven’t received my third (this year’s version) yet, but the two I purchased last year are much “softer” than most tweed I’ve tried.

   2. How does Boden run size-wise?

      1. I wear the same size in J.Crew and Boden.

      2. They always list the exact measurements of each garment in each size, so it doesn’t really matter how they “run.”

      3. They always list the exact measurements of each garment in each size, so it doesn’t really matter how they “run.”

   3. Question about this dress–do the sleeves fit well under sweaters?

      1. I wear it with blazers, so I can’t really comment, but I tend to find most wool/tweed sleeved dresses don’t work well with sweaters due to the bulk.

4. HOW DARE SOMEBODY STEAL MY GREEK YOGURT FROM THE OFFICE FRIDGE????????????????????????????

   1. Oh no, there goes Tokyo…

      1. +100

   2. One time I did this. I had Fage and my colleague ate Oikos and so there a half eaten Fage in the fridge and I ate it but it was hers. So I was sorry and also, gross. Maybe it was a mistake?

   3. Actual story stuck in moderation but – once I did this on accident, and I was sorry.

      1. A coworker ate a different brand so I thought the yogurt in the fridge was mine but it wasn’t. And it was half-eaten. So I was sorry and kind of grossed out.

   4. I threw one away the other day that expired in February. If that one was yours, I did you a favor.

      Also, I was once accidentally stealing another attorney’s bananas. We have a counter in the break room where people leave “up for grabs” food. He didn’t like keeping his bananas in his office because of flies so he would drop them off on the counter in the morning. I was eating them since that has been the universal “free food” spot. One day I saw him drop it off and I asked “why do you keep buying bananas if you never eat them. I mean, I don’t mind, more for me.” He laughed and said “oh, YOU are the banana thief.” Then he explained why he left them there and I explained why I was eating them. He totally understood and started leaving a label on them after that they weren’t part of the “free food.”

   5. HULK WAS HUNGRY….

      HULK NOT MEAN TO MAKE BIG GREEN MAD….

      WANT TO SMASH THINGS TOGETHER?

5. Love the dress, perfect for blue October!

6. Ok, does anyone else have a hard time matching cobalt? Kat suggests navy with this, but I don’t think navy and cobalt look very good together. Maybe it’s just that I always forget that cobalt looks funny on my fair but olive skin tone. Does anyone else have trouble with cobalt?

   1. Are you sure you’re really fair olive? I’m German/Italian and cobalt looks fantastic on me. I pair or with navy, grey, forest green, black and white.

   2. Yup. I am also fair olive (from the Celtic side) and cobalt looks AWFUL on me. Of course, everyone knows my deep-seated hate of cobalt. :) I can do navy/indigo, but most other blues (light blue and cobalt) look terrible. I can do turquoise though, as long as it’s more toward the green end.

   3. I pair cobalt with coral, yellow, white, black, turquoise, camel, grey, pale pink, and chocolate brown. But it’s all about the different tones available in each color flattering each other and your complexion. I love cobalt because it’s great with my pinky pale skin.

      1. I have a purple blazer and I would not pair it with this dress. Neutrals would work well, I generally don’t like black, too stark. For neutrals I’d probably pick grey or white and certain shades of cream/off white might work. I was also going to suggest pale pink, I saw a blazer in H&M recently that I think would go well with this i.e. the color. Also olive green, depending on the shade. This is a color that *pops* so to me using muted or neutral shades lets it shine, without competing.

7. I actually like this except I think the metallic sparkles might be too much for daytime IRL. You can see the shiny if you zoom in.

   TJ: I took two days off work for a long weekend coming up (Columbus Day) but my plans fell through. Anyone have any last minute ideas for where to go that would be an easy trip from NYC? I’d probably prefer not to fly this short notice and drive/train instead, but all ideas are welcome. I’ll be with my SO, so some place kind of dreamy and romantic would be good. Only criteria is that it’s short notice, should have good food, not be completely unreasonably expensive, and I’m not a very active outdoorsy type – as in I love walking around and sitting in outdoor cafes drinking wine, but not into renting bikes or kayaking or that sort of thing. Where would you go if you had a 4 day weekend in October?

   1. Boston? You can take the train. The Acela is really quick.

      1. Love Boston! But we just went there for a Labor Day weekend… So much fun though!

         1. Providence? Waterfire will still be going on, I think.

            The Wall Street Journal had a piece on spending a 4-day-weekend in Providence just this past weekend.
            http://online.wsj.com/articles/the-perfect-long-weekend-in-providence-1411755862

         2. Not sure I would classify Boston as “dreamy and romantic” though :) That’s definitely not the local character around these parts!

   2. Burlington, VT? Leaves. Fall. General New Englandiness abounds.

      1. Along those lines- Middlebury, VT too? Make a 2 town stop?

   3. Finger Lakes or Connecticut wine country (near Mystic – also good for a day trip to Newport for food and wandering)?

   4. Philly? Lots of coffee/wine places and dreamy BYOB places.

      I also liked Woodstock/Kingston for this–you could maybe rent a cabin type closer to the towns instead of in the mountains.

   5. You could go to Woodstock VT if you don’t mind a long drive! Or somewhere in RI along the coast – Newport or one of the little towns there? (those are trainable via amtrak)

   6. DC or Arlington. Easy to get to, great weather, stuff to do, fantastic food, not outdoorsy.

      1. Lots of free attractions in DC!

      2. I’d head to DC for starters and then wind my way back north, stopping at Winterthur for their fun Downton Abbey costume exhibit.

   7. Yay! I love this dress, Kat, and it is Frank-proof, meaneing NO stareing at boobie’s!

      As for the OP, think about heading to the Sagamore Hotel in Bolton Landing on Lake George. It is a littel chilly this time of year –Alan once took me there and he actueally paid for the hotel, which is NOT cheep. Of course, he never made me forget that we went there. But he was very “romantic” if you know what I mean, and the room’s were nice and we had alot of privacy.

      On a more serious note, Dad is very mad about the Ebola thing comeing into the US (Dallas). He said that the TSA is dumb and peeople can come through with Ebola and no one know’s it. He wonders if anyone has a solution that could be shared. I do NOT have one, but thought the HIVE might. Does anyone have a solution that can solve this probelem?

      Noah said he would quarantine all flight’s from Africa and Europe and make peeople proove they are ebola free for 21 day’s before comeing in to the US. Mabye that would work? Noah want’s to take me to the Opera this weekend. I do NOT know anything about Opera except that the ladie’s sing VERY loudley. I said OK, but we have to eat first b/c I get hungry sitteing at a movie or at the opera. David also wants me meet but he was to grabbie under my dress at the movie’s. FOOEY!

   8. I would do somewhere on Amtrak like Boston, Philly, or DC. If you just want to focus on sitting around eating, Philly has some great restaurants and it’s the closest, plus you can look at art if that gets boring.

      1. Check out Sazon Restaurant and The Barnes Foundation. I lived near Philadelphia for ten years and those were our favorites. And Longwood Gardens but that’s a bit out of the city. But Stunning at all times of the year.

      2. If you choose Philadelphia, please consider the Kimpton hotel next to the Liberty Bell. We stayed there his past winter, and it was great: reasonable rates, clean room, interesting building and room design, huge fabulous bathroom with deep sink free-standing tub from which at night (because we were on the corner) we could see Independence Hall lit up. (They say you can see the liberty bell, but actually you can see the protective walls around the liberty bell from the tub.)

   9. Annapolis or Cape May

   10. spent labor day weekend near New Paltz via airbnb. it was a lovely college town – lots of fresh/farm-to-table restaurants nearby (along the Hudson) and while there’s a good bit of hiking and biking in the area there are lots of cute stores/cafes/galleries and small pick-your-own farms you could slowly wander around. they actually said now is the bustling high season due to the lovely change in colors (leaves). I think there was also an area preserved with old 1700s homes that you could walk around. fits into your romantic factor.

       and it’s a short trip with a train station very close by. so super NYC getaway friendly.

       1. Thanks ladies! Lots of good ideas here. I am going to spend my afternoon looking up all these places. So much for work productivity…

   11. Cape Cod! I’ve never been in fall but my aunt who lives there loves it.

8. I desperately need a vacation. Besides long weekends or trips to visit family, my husband and I haven’t taken a true vacation together in over 7 years. Work schedules, house renovations, etc. have always gotten in the way. We are looking into the Florida Keys. We’re interested in snorkeling, paddleboarding, fishing, biking and beach time – but not too rowdy or touristy of a destination. For those of you have traveled to the Keys, any particular spots you would recommend?

   1. I’ve been to the Keys and it was a great trip — stayed in Key West, which was a lot of fun. If you stay away from the main strip, it is actually not that rowdy. However — and I think this is generally true of all of the Keys, not just Key West (although happy to be corrected) — the beaches are not that fabulous. There may be a few good ones, but you have to especially target them. And, for the best snorkeling and such, people generally seem to go to Dry Tortugas, which is like a 2 hour boat ride away. We didn’t do that, but the snorkeling did require maybe a 30-45 minute boat ride out to a sandbar? (And it wasn’t off of Key West, but rather some other island). Still a totally worthwhile trip, but it’s not the same as, say, the beaches in Miami.

   2. IME, the beaches in Key West particularly weren’t that great. Full of seaweed and not all that pretty. I think it has something to do with the reef structure, which is a bonus if you are into snorkeling/diving. We found the same thing in Belize (again, fantastic snorkeling/diving)

      1. Agreed. There are a handful of beaches in the Keys that are ok, but for the most part, they aren’t great. I drove out to Bahai Honda State Park, which is about a 45 minute drive from Key West and is a pretty nice beach (though you can still get some of the seaweed)-it has bathrooms/showers and a small concession stand/gift shop, so you could make a day trip out of it from Key West. I’ve also stayed on Islamorada, which I remember being nice but lacking in beaches, but it was a long time ago so I don’t recall where specifically we stayed.

   3. Seven years with no vacation and you’re going to settle for Florida?!?!? At least get yourself to the Caribbean or Costa Rica.

      1. Staying stateside seems like a better fit for our budget, since we can do direct flights on Allegiant or Southwest and the take the Keys shuttle the rest of the way. Do you have cheap recs for the Caribbean?

         1. Vieques, Puerto Rico. It’s an island off the coast of Puerto Rico, and it is gorgeous. You can either fly to San Juan or take the ferry from Fajardo. We flew to San Juan, took a taxi service to Fajardo (arrange ahead of time), and took the ferry. My understanding is it’s a little more touristy/developed now than when I went about 5 years ago, but you should still be able to find something cheap. Rent a car. Most of the beaches are on land that was owned by the Navy and are completely undeveloped. They are amazing.

            1. Thanks! Checking into it.

         2. It’s been seven years!!!!!! Up your budget. Sell a kid if you have to.

            1. There’s nothing wrong with vacationing in Florida. Maybe it’s not your preference, but if someone’s happy with it, why should they go over budget to go somewhere more expensive?

            2. Sarasota is lovely, IMO. Easy to get to, beautiful beaches, more to do than just the beach, golf and the early bird special.

         3. Hubby and I are taking a Southwest flight there in a few weeks and I was surprised how cheap it was. It’s 3 hours from Atlanta.

         4. Cancun is nice. If you stay at an all-inclusive you can get plenty of beach relaxation time. The only thing is that you may need to set up separate excursions to go snorkeling and fishing. Also, I don’t think there is much in the way of hiking. But depending on where you are, you may be able to get a direct flight.

            1. If flying to Cancun, I would recommend Playa del Carmen instead. About 45 minutes south and lots of all-inclusives, which should help with price. I’ve been there a few times and love it. Be careful to avoid the touristy areas near the main pier.

   4. Love Key West (beach at Ft. Zach is great), but also get to Bahia Honda State Park around MM 33 (or is it 36?)–the only natural white sand beaches in the Keys. Beautiful. My BIL used to be the park manager there, and so he lived in the park, and we spent many a vacation there. Love it. They run snorkeling trips out to the atlantic side reefs, too.

   5. Islamorada is a quieter area in the Keys with fantastic snorkeling/diving, but again, no real white sand beach. I stayed at the Islander about 10 years ago, which my parents had stayed at probably 30 years ago and found it charming in an ‘Old Florida” way. But again, that was many years ago so I can’t vouch for it today. If you want the true “white sand” beaches, maybe look into hitting up Marco Island? It is high rise heavy, but there is a lovely state park towards the end of the island and the beaches are gorgeous.

   6. We recently looked into going to Key West and decided on the Dominican Republic instead because it was much nicer for the same cost. The hotels in Key West are fairly expensive and there really aren’t any nice beaches there.

   7. Key Largo. Quiescence Dive Shop–they know the best spots and take out smaller boats so you are safer. (Sometimes people have been left behind diving off a big tourist boat.)

   8. I’m totally going to be following this. Hubs and I are in desperate need of a vacation. And in trying to pull my passport paperwork together, I realized that I am more than 15 years since my last passport (I never got it officially changed with my name change–I should have…lesson learned) and I would have to go through the whole rigmarole again with in-person application blah blah blah. So, out-of-country travel is off limits for me for a while.

      1. I just got my first passport two years ago and my husband had to renew one that had expired 10 years ago, and it took us about 30 minutes total for the application and we had our passports in three weeks. If your County Clerk is an agency, they tend to be amazingly fast and good at these.

   9. It is not in the Keys, but I suggest you look into Sanibel Island, on the Gulf side. I find it much less party-oriented, the beaches are beautiful and it has a cute seaside-cottage kind of downtown.

      1. +1 for Sanibel! I was just there in August and it’s my favorite place to vacation. Biking is fabulous, paddle boarding available in many locations on the island , and fishing charters available. I’ve never snorkeled on the island and the beaches have a lot of shells so it’s not a white sandy beach. Sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking. It’s my idea of a perfect place to just soak up the sun (with appropriate SPF of course) and relax. Not a whole lot in the way of nightlife but I’ve always been so tired from being outside all day that the lack of nightlife never bothered me.

         1. And it’s not far from Naples and Ft Myers if you want some night life.

   10. If you want something really low key, check out the Gasparilla Inn on Boca Grande (Gulf side). Old fashioned approach to time off and lots of flat, white sand beaches.

9. Q for those of you who rent apartments/townhouses from smaller landlords. In this case I think they have 1-3 properties based on looking at county tax records–so this is not a bigbox apartment who is using the statewide standard form lease.

   The lease they sent me (I have not signed yet) provides that I am responsible for repairing/replacing the stove, microwave, garbage disposal, dishwasher, and garage door unless they break due to landlord’s negligence. I know that they can legally insert this provision under state law, but I don’t see why I should be responsible unless the appliance damage is caused by my own action–many times appliances are inherently faulty or just go bad over time, and I’m not buying them a new stove that they get to keep forever because the one that’s in there now is on the last year of its life. Also, this property was bank-owned when they bought it, so who knows how well the garage door mechanism has been maintained, and those are $$$ to fix. Anyway, I’m curious how many others renting from small landlords have a similar provision, because my instinct is that it’s wildly out of line with market rental terms, and is just in there because they are using a really pro-landlord (and horribly drafted) off the shelf internet form lease. Just trying to gather some data before I push back.

   1. That’s an ACTUAL legal term in a rental agreement? Everywhere I’ve ever rented has put the landlord in charge of fixing, maintaining, and replacing fixtures. Frankly – I feel like most places even make them responsible for fixing things that are the tenants fault and then the landlord can take it out of the security fee in the end.

      Anyway – I don’t think I would sign that lease for exactly the reasons you’re worried about. This isn’t my area of expertise, but that seems like a really risky deal for the tenant – especially a short-term tenant.

   2. I’ve rented four out of five of my apartments from smaller landlords in VA, and I’ve never seen a provision like that.

   3. Negotiate your lease. In our lease they (mistakingly) did not include the gas fireplaces as one of the appliances they would maintain and we made them put it in there.

   4. I rent from a small landlord now, and rented from a different one a couple of years ago, and in both cases the landlord was responsible for replacing appliances unless I damaged them. This is a totally unreasonable lease provision, and I agree with the others you should negotiate it out before you sign.

   5. I have an extremely landlord friendly lease, but that provision is out there. It should be reversed – they fix unless you used the appliance in an unsafe fashion.

   6. With that wording, it seems like you’d be on the hook for normal wear and tear. That’s not standard, I wouldn’t sign it.

   7. Uhhhh. Say no. Sometimes small landlords don’t know better, and because a lot of people just sign on the dotted line and don’t read the fine print they’ve gotten away with non-market provisions like this.

      Is there a local real estate board you can use as a resource? Boston has the Greater Boston Real Estate Board that produces state-law compliant, straight forward lease agreements for people like your landlord (and mine).

   8. I am a small landlord. I don’t have a provision like that, but I do have provisions that the provided appliances are in as-is condition and that I am not required to fix or replace if they break unless required by code or law (so that w/d in the unit: if it breaks, it breaks). My concern is that a broken appliance creates a liability for me (breach of the lease) and not just an unhappy tenant (a big deal, too, but I try to screen for people who understand that a small LL may need a few days to get contractors in, etc.).

      1. That’s nonsense. You rent me an apt with a washer dryer and it breaks down you fix it. There’s no reason you can’t do that and take a reasonable time to repair. I have little sympathy for this woe is me small landlord attitude. It’s a business. If running it is a burden get out of it.

         My dishwasher breaks because it’s 7 yrs old. Do I buy a new one, pay for installation, and then take it with me when I leave? Absurd.

         1. You can go to a big commercial landlord with a maintenance staff.

            Or, if you go with a smaller landlord, we spell it out for you in advance. You probably get a better property at a better price. And you probably get better service (it’s just better that way; no one wants an unhappy tenant and karma is a b!tch). And you’d get a new dishwasher (mine just did), but if it takes a week to coordinate with the big box store, I don’t want you threatening to break your lease or suing me (sorry: grew up reading NYC leases).

            FWIW, this is fairly standard in leases in my area, even from commercial landlords (no duty to maintain amenities not required by code; if the pool has to close, your lease continues and there is no reduction in rent).

            1. Or you could just put in a landlord cure period. I’ve never seen a residential lease with the tenant wholly responsible for replacing fixtures, absent tenant’s gross negligence. Amenities are a different story than fixtures.

               ETA: NYC is its own animal, so I’m sure there are standard lease provisions there that are considered outrageous elsewhere.

         2. While I appreciate your full disclosure in your lease, I also appreciate that I have the option to never, ever, ever sign a lease with any language like that. I’d be interested to know if your tenants actually understand/read that provision.

            What area are you in that that is typical? I’m in commercial real estate and work on multifamily properties daily. I’d love to know for my own research/daily work where this is considered “standard”.

         3. Small landlords sometimes do ridiculous things, like entering apartments without notification because they saw a window open and it was going to rain within 24 hours, providing 3 window screens in an apartment in southern Virginia with 12 windows and no AC (technically the minimum required by law for a 2 bedroom apartment), demanding a tenant who gets permission to install ceiling fans in said non-AC apartment leave the ceiling fans as landlord’s property instead of removing them as they are now “part of the apartment,” painting over black mold and saying the problem is fixed (also technically legal), firing a contractor who’s installing waterproofing in a basement apartment after massive water leaks after they’ve ripped up the kitchen and left the entire living space unusable and not hiring a new one for a month, or refusing to send out a technician to fix the heat in November because it’s “not cold enough to need to turn on the heat.”

            In my experience, some small landlords seem to think they’re doing you a favor by letting you live in their house, not that you’re paying for use of a space. Some small landlords are awesome and let you pick out the paint colors when they renovate the kitchen, or buy top of the line, really efficient appliances after they break three times in six months, but my experience has been a 2:1 bad to good ratio.

            1. Yeah, I think part of this mentality is that for many they didn’t “go into the business.” They were forced to move away from homes that they couldn’t sell and were stuck renting it out to avoid foreclosure. Most don’t have the slush fund to make all the necessary repairs so that is a big risk. But like was noted above, you are probably getting a much better place at a much lower price. I rented out a home I couldn’t sell for the price of apartments in the area. The tenants got a full house w/ a yard. The deal was if something broke, they were to call me for approval first and then they could hire someone to come fix. I would either pay the bill directly over the phone to the service provider or I would let the tenant pay it and deduct it from next month’s rent if that is what they preferred. This let them get the problem fixed immediately and they got the bonus of picking out the replacement if it was an appliance. Otherwise, I couldn’t get to the state until that weekend.

               We tried to keep emotions out of things but that was still “our house” that we bought when we got married and lived in for five awesome years before we moved for work. It was heartbreaking when tenants trashed it because it wasn’t just a business loss to us.

               We sold it this year FINALLY and are no longer landlords! It just took 5 years.

            2. I’ve had a large management company do that type of thing to me. I am now a small landlord who lives in one of the units on the property. We do our best to maintain the rental units, although, like LL mentioned, it can take a week to order an appliance and have it delivered from a big box store. We don’t have a provision like the one LL described, but so far, none of our tenants have ever complained about delays on things not working. I have entered a tenant’s apartment without permission twice — tenant was out of town during a hurricane, and we entered to make sure things were secure (windows closed etc) and then to make sure there was no damage after. We texted the tenant before we entered both times but did not get a response, so we just did it anyways.

         4. OP here. To the extent it’s relevant to this discussion, I don’t think the rent in this unit reflects such an enormous exposure. Assuming they financed 100% of the purchase price (unlikely, but I’m being conservative), the mortgage payment + taxes + HOA still has them netting $400 per month, which is more than enough for them to put aside for repairs.

            1. If you’re nosy, you can look up what the mortgage is at the courthouse. Many counties have a website that lets you do this.

            2. Haha yeah, I already found it on our county records webs!te, I’m just too cheap to pay the per-page cost to obtain the records. I can only see the first page for free, but that was enough to at least be able to see the purchase price and figure out a max potential mortgage cost. Considering this was a foreclosure property they purchased in 2009, seems much more likely they had to put 20% down and they are probably clearing $600-$700/mo.

            3. Not sure if my first attempt went through because I forgot to replace the ‘i’ in s!te, so here’s a duplicate…

               Haha yeah, I already found it on our county records webs!te, I’m just too cheap to pay the per-page cost to obtain the records. I can only see the first page for free, but that was enough to at least be able to see the purchase price and figure out a max potential mortgage cost. Considering this was a foreclosure property they purchased in 2009, seems much more likely they had to put 20% down and they are probably clearing $600-$700/mo.

            4. How could you possibly know their financial situation in order to assume that they can “put aside” $400 a month for repairs? You don’t know what they need that income for.

            5. @ Unicorn–

               1. You’d be amazed what you can find about someone’s financial situation on the internet.

               2. As a landlord, they “need” that income first and foremost to maintain the property which generates said income. It’s not my job to fund their IRAs or the pool repairs at their primary residence.

            6. Actually, if the house needed a new roof or any other major repairs, your extra $400 a month for a year wouldn’t even cover it.

               At this point you have 3 choices:
               1 – Talk to them about it, and see if you can get them to strike that clause from the lease, or at least for the major appliances like the fridge and stove. If living without a dishwasher or w/d is a dealbreaker for you, tell them that, and if you can’t live with their answer, leave.
               2 – Sign the lease and chance that nothing will break (not recommended)
               3 – Go somewhere else. As a landlord, while we don’t have anything quite this specific in our leases, we have told tenants that there are certain things that we are not going to negotiate on because we just can’t or because we’ve been burned on them before. Example: recent prospective tenants that were insisting they wouldn’t remove their own snow from the driveway, we had to before they needed to go to work. The weren’t willing to go there, as we barely get the snow cleared from our own driveway and will call off or work from home on really snowy days – if that was a dealbreaker for them, they needed to find another apartment.

               Renting from someone is a 2 way street. If you don’t like the lease, don’t rent from them.

            7. Thanks for the response Meg. I will note that this is a townhouse and the exterior structure, such as roof, is covered by the HOA.

               But the two things that are particularly concerning to me are:
               1. It’s not just that I would be without a dishwasher, ie, if it stops working I can’t just leave the dead dishwasher sitting there and wash dishes by hand–the lease provision as drafted requires me to pay to REPLACE the dishwasher (they get to select the model and the repairman to install, so I’m really just paying for it), and they get to keep it when I move out.
               2. I had to break my lease in my current apartment and already give notice to take this place, and I am frustrated that they would present me with a lease that is such an unexpectedly significant departure from standard rental terms. If this is how they want to rent their properties, that’s fine, but they should disclose it upfront. Also, the rent they are charging is pretty excessive for such a term to be in effect. I have been looking at properties in this area very seriously for some time, so I’m familiar with what’s “market” rent in the area for this type of property. If the rent had been lower, that would have been a signal that the terms were going to be slanted, but it’s not.

            8. You really should have asked to review the lease before you broke your current lease. Also, I wouldn’t bring that up to your new LL b/c no one likes a tenant that breaks the lease. It doesn’t say “look how much I like you” it says “I’m going to screw you next.”

            9. @ BL

               They actually know, we discussed the timing and needing to give notice ASAP. My lease provides for an early termination buyout, and I am “breaking” under those terms, so it’s no different than when that landlord forced me to move into a new unit so the old one could be upgraded with shiny appliances–they were “breaking” it, but perfectly within the terms of the lease.

               And because they knew, they had plenty of opportunity to draft the early termination provisions in their favor. They have that right, and if a landlord doesn’t exercise it, well it’s no different than if I just signed this lease without reading it and then complained when I actually had to replace a dishwasher. Not exactly a situation calling for sympathy.

            10. Got cutoff trying to add–my early termination provision requires 60 days’ notice to terminate + a breakup fee. We are already within 60 days of the move-in for this new unit, so I will be paying double rent from the time of move-in until I get to the end of the 60 day period on the current apartment. For this reason, I wanted to start that 60 day clock as soon as possible and provide notice. The landlord used a standard form application which I am very familiar with, so I expected they would use the same form lease, and relied on their representations of the unit and lease terms. Of course saving $500 on double rent is now appearing not worth it if I’m going to be stuck with shady people as landlords who misrepresent their lease terms in person and then shove me a one-sided lease (that also actually expressly gives them the right to murder my dog if they think he has a flea or he leaves a mud track on the carpet–WTF?), and that’s part of my frustration. Obviously I’m not contemplating legal action.

            11. Anyway, I think I’m getting worked up about this and hopefully it probably is just unintentional blind following of the form, and we’ll see what they say. I assume the pet provision is, because that’s incredibly disturbing, but jeez at the random internet dude generating these forms full of typos and ineffective waivers of duties that the housing code provides cannot be waived.

            12. Pet provision sounds insane. We had to walk away from renting a place once because of something similar. All dog friendly on the phone but the lease says no dogs over 50 lbs. Ours is 70. They say “oh that is fine” but they won’t write it into the lease. They end up telling us that sometimes tenants “have to have their dog’s vocal cords scraped if they bark too much” and we were like, “yeah, we are never doing that.” They weren’t impressed, we walked.

      2. Our small landlord (like they only have this one place) included nice to haves in “as is” condition. For example, they left a bbq. Great, we are happy, but we are responsible for cleaning etc and if it breaks, we can replace it (and take it with us when we leave) but they are not required to. It makes perfect sense. The washer/dryer/dishwasher/fridge/stove are a different story.

      3. I own several rental properties in CA and AZ. It would never occur to me to rent a property to a tenant with a lease clause that makes them responsible for the appliances. That’s ridiculous.

   9. I rent from a smaller landlord now (and have also in the past). I’ve never had such a term appear in the agreement. The landlord was responsible for repairing or replacing provided appliances that stop functioning properly due to normal wear and tear.

      Your lease sounds like it was drafted wildly in favor of the landlord, not to mention unreasonable.

   10. Thanks for all the feedback, everyone. This is what I suspected and I had already planned on negotiating this point, but it’s really helpful to have backup to my instinct that it’s a nonmarket term.

   11. My lease says that I can’t let guests use the sauna. (There is no sauna). Small landlords often download leases from the internet and don’t know what is in them, so this might be accidentally and not purposely bizarre.

       1. I would like to think so, but the lease is a fillable PDF (I’m assuming because it’s mostly in black with certain lines filled in with blue text). They filled in the box listing those specific appliances.

   12. Ugh, I feel with renting you are doomed if you do and doomed if you don’t. I am so fed up with my corporate apartment complex (drugs, faulty fire alarms, dubious security, so many issues), but am terrified to lease from a private person because of issues like this. I can say that if I ever did, and the landlord insisted I buy my own appliances, I would definitely take every single one with me when I left (including dishwashers and ceiling fans; I probably wouldn’t be above removing light fixtures and faucets either if I had to pay for those). I would read the other terms very carefully to make sure you wouldn’t have to pay for larger issues you couldn’t ‘take with you’ (ex., roof damage, leaks, mold, etc.).

   13. As a smaller landlord, I think this provision is ridiculous. When we bought our property, all of the appliances were in their last years (or days). We knew this going in. So far, out of three units, we’ve bought 2 washers, 2 driers, 2 refrigerators, and one stove. I would ask the landlord to revise this term.

10. Random question. I paid in cash for something at Saks Off Fifth because their credit card system was down. When I returned the item, I presented my receipt but they made me show my drivers’ license and entered my information into their system. The guy had no explanation except that their system requires it. Does anyone know why they would take my DL for a return when I had a receipt? It makes me nervous giving this information with all the security breaches at stores these days.

    1. Because if you paid with a card, they know who you are, have a record of all your purchases, and can keep track of whether you make excessive returns. If you paid cash, they don’t, so they need you to tell them and track your purchase records that way.

    2. It’s also so they can keep track of who becomes a “problem returner.” If you were consistently buying things and coming back without receipts, they’d start to see a pattern and loss prevention would get involved. Even though you have a receipt, it’s built into these systems that they need the information from your license.

11. I admit I really didn’t know much about Maldives before I googled it yesterday after reading the comments here. But now I’m curious – how much do you take the government into account when choosing international travel destinations? I tend to think that I could probably find something I don’t like about any nation, and that travel to foreign cultures is a valuable experience, so I’ve personally never given it a ton of thought. I would love to visit China, but the Uighur/Tibet issues and censorship. I would love to visit a lot of Central/South American countries and Southeast Asia, but environmental issues. I would love to visit a lot of Muslim countries, but equal rights for women and religious freedom. And on and on. The local economy gets a boost from tourism, but tax revnue from tourism also funds the national government and supports stuff I have moral qualms with. Where do you draw the line?

    1. Maybe your absence helps maintain the status quo? Maybe your presence changes it? Why deny the world broader exposure to you? The street, in many places, would love to see you much more than their governments.

    2. Idiosyncratically. In general, as long as a country is safe for tourists I’ll go if I want to, but there are some countries I just don’t want to go because of ethical concerns (Japan, Maldives, Venezuela, Jamaica).

       1. Can I ask what’s wrong with Japan (from a place of ignorance)?

          1. and Jamaica?

          2. Japan- hunts whales. Jamaica- serious homophobia issues.

             Like I said, idiosyncratic and certainly not comprehensive, but it works for me.

             1. I didn’t realize that about Jamaica– thank you.

             2. This is interesting. Couldn’t you find something like that about nearly every country? US- pollutes unapologetically, incarcerates more of its population than any other country (assuming you’re from the US here). Isn’t virtually every country involved in something heinous? And loads of countries are extremely homophobic. That is a very idiosyncratic list!

                I’m pretty sure I’d travel everywhere if I could guarantee my safety (obviously not possible). I figure that maintained exposure to the rest of the world is a good thing for countries who don’t grant human rights. A friend and I even looked into those guided North Korea tours.

             3. Are you serious? Japan is not the only country that hunts whales. And in lots of other countries, including the US, hunting of lots of other cute animals is allowed. I love animals and Eco-friendly tourism but that attitude is absurd. I can’t imagine missing out on seeing such a beautiful and interesting country because of something like that.

             4. I really view this as a personal preference. Of course you can find concerns with nearly anywhere, but vacation is really about what appeals to me. Japan doesn’t because whales. Switzerland doesn’t- just cause? Never grabbed my imagination? I’m not suggesting anyone else follow my list or that anyone who doesn’t is somehow wrong, this is just how I choose to spend my scarce vacation time.

    3. I’ve visited Israel even though I am uneasy with some of its politics. I learned so much more by going there and talking with the people than I would have reading op-eds back home. I am fine with traveling to any country (as long as I will be personally safe) to learn about it and to encounter new and different people, cultures and ideas.

       As an aside, I have a facebook friend who just posted pictures of her visit to North Korea! Even though that is definitely on the list of bad governments, it was really interesting to see her pictures and read her comments about being there and talking to the people. I think the more we talk to each other and see things from different perspectives, the better the world will be.

       1. Well that just seems idiotic. North Korea happily seizes Americans and holds them hostage for years.

          1. Obviously I wouldn’t go! But it was cool that she did and shared pictures. You’re right, it is not safe for Americans there.

          2. I have a Fb friend who went to N. Korea too. It’s apparently not that hard to go, you just need to be part of a school-affiliated trip. I probably wouldn’t go because of concerns for my safety, even though I think it would be really cool. Cuba, on the other hand, I’m dying to visit and I really hope I can make it there before it opens up to US tourism.

       2. I didn’t know it was possible to travel to North Korea! It’s not on my list… although Iran is (I won’t be going there any time soon, though). Concern for my and my family’s personal safety is really the only thing that keeps me away from anywhere I would otherwise want to go on historical, cultural, or ecological merit. That said, I try to be very mindful of where my money is going on a micro scale – ie, I will never do a swim with dolphins experience, and I try to avoid big resorts that were clear cut out of a forest, or displaced the original human inhabitants by physical or economic force.

       3. I take more issue with the fact that North Korea starves its citizens and has an overall terrible dictator. Paying money to visit a country with such screwed up priorities is really unethical, in my opinion.

    4. Went to Tanzania knowing that homosexuality is illegal. Husband didnt know until he got there and was a but put off. Neither of us regret the trip. No one has ever called us out on it.

       On the flip side for some reason I can’t stomach the idea of visiting Cuba just because it is communist.

       I think you should do you, whatever that means.

    5. The state department website is a good source of information when planning international travel. For example, here’s their page on Jamaica: http://travel.state.gov/content/passports/english/country/jamaica.html

    6. The state department webs!te is a good source of information when planning international travel. For example, here’s their page on Jamaica: http://travel.state.gov/content/passports/english/country/jamaica.html

    7. I think basing your travel on the (presumed or real) ethical views of the government makes absolutely no sense. Southerners in the US are stereotyped as being racist, sexist, and conservative, so would you rule out a trip to Charleston? IMHO, the only time it makes sense to avoid a country is where there is could be a very real threat to yourself (for example, I would not currently travel to Liberia, but that’s about where I draw the line).

       1. +1 million. You can find fault with almost any government. I’ll go anywhere I won’t fear for my safety.

       2. Yeah. Criticizing random strangers on the internet for their admittedly idiosyncratic vacation decisions is my hobby too.

       3. Really? Absolutely no sense? I’m uncomfortable supporting certain government regimes where I know (I do not presume) there are heinous human rights abuses. For example, though I’d love to take a safari someday, my friends are traveling to Uganda next year and I will not be joining. The (extremely well-documented) state-sponsored abuses of political dissidents, tribal minorities, and homosexuals in Uganda, and the extent to which tourism supports Museveni’s regime, prevent me from traveling there. If you don’t agree, fine, but don’t denigrate other people’s convictions.

       4. Presumably if you had a big issue with a country’s ethics, it would impact how much you enjoyed being there. Maybe it doesn’t bother you, and that’s fine, but different people have different preferences.

       5. Actually, I personally would not go to the South. I’ve HAD to go there for work and didn’t enjoy it. Yes, racism.

    8. I went to Lang Kawai (sp?) Malaysia. I didn’t think anything of it until a client commented with total disgust that I patronized a “Muslim country.” For reasons I don’t want to get into, I don’t think my client is religiously intolerant or racist or anything. His reason was solely their treatment of women. I was surprised given that he does business in other countries that I thought treated women worse.

       I declined to travel to Jordan when my brother was abroad there. I was totally freaked out by some old laws that may not even be enforced anymore but I didn’t want to take the chance. One was that a spouse, brother or father could place a travel hold on a woman so she couldn’t leave the country.

       1. The Malaysia example is interesting because even though many people in Malaysia are indeed Muslim, women run a large proportion of businesses there and in fact have a lot of power. But again, things can vary by state and local community….much the same as any other country.

    9. As long as safety is not the concern, I am good to go to any country.

       1. Same. You can find fault with pretty much any government (obviously some are better than others, of course, but that’s usually when you get into safety concerns–I’m not setting foot in North Korea). The main country I’d love to visit that some people might consider questionable for political reasons is Cuba. Then again, I’m of the opinion Cuba would probably move to being a lot less Communist if we’d lift the embargo and had more travel between the US and Cuba (because yay for soft power).

       2. I agree with this but I would add that when pregnant my definition of ‘safety’ expands to include good access to maternal healthcare. This means Ireland, Dominician Republic, Ecudaor, Columbia and a few others are off the list because their laws prohibit abortion even if required to save the life of the mom. My daughter needs me to come back from vacation alive. Don’t want to end up like that dentist in Ireland who they let die from her miscarriage.

    10. I would definitely never travel to Maldives or Dubai or any of the crazy Islamic countries that treat women as second class citizen by law. They just don’t merely discriminate against women, rape victims are lashed or put in jail, women have no freedom, basic human rights, it’s disgusting such barbaric governments and countries exit even today. I would not waste my tourist dollars “exploring” such countries, there is no touristic beauty or adventures out there when I know how the law treats women as less than fully human. It infuriates me, I would not hide behind political correctness or cultural sensitivity crap and flat out refuse to travel to such places and explicitly tell anyone who asks me why, I have no shame in refusing to endorse/support/explore barbaric culture. 
        No I am not a white American privileged woman, I grew up in one of these countries and now that I have moved to a developed progressive country, I will not hide my contempt and disgust at such societies. 

    11. Name a country that doesn’t do objectionable things…?

        1. Canada?

12. Hi all – as with most people here, I work some demanding hours and am preparing to go back to grad school. And I find myself stumped – how did you do it? After working a 70-75 hour week, I find I just don’t have time to study and prepare for exams. Is this possible? Am I just not prioritizing my time properly or do most people take a leave of absence from work to prepare for exams?

    1. If you’re working 70-75 hours a week, then yeah, you’re not going to have much time to take classes, study, or do your work. Are you always working at work? We used to study during downtime.

    2. First, I take only one class, though two is typical in my program. It’s a little frustrating that it will take twice as long to finish, but it’s important to me to do well and I realized there just aren’t enough hours in the day if I’m taking two.

       I have had to learn very different time management and study skills to deal with school on top of family and a full time job. I need a couple larger blocks of time (an hour or so) throughout the week to focus on really absorbing new information, but beyond that I take an “every little bit counts” approach. I set aside a 15-20 minute break at work, I do 15-20 minutes before bed, that type of thing. I record lectures and listen to them again during my commute. I make index cards with key highlights and carry them in my purse so I can pull them out to review if I’m waiting in a long line, etc. For me, repetition makes a big difference … I used to attend lecture, do the reading, and pretty much be good for an exam without any extra work. But now there’s just so much other stuff cluttering my mind compared to when I was an undergrad, I find I don’t retain information after seeing it only one time as well as I used to.

       I still usually take a sick day in the days leading up to my exams though.

       ETA: I have coworkers who have taken a full week or two off to prepare for exams, so it’s definitely done… I just can’t stomach using my vacation time to study.

    3. Will you continue working after you start your program? I read your question as asking about preparing for exams like the GRE, GMAT, etc.

       I don’t have a family or many obligations outside of work, but I’ve spent ALL of my free time over the past year studying for entrance exams and taking prerequisites. I don’t work quite as much as you do though.

    4. I do this and take a full semester load. it’s insane. Depending on what’s crashing at the moment, I try to scale back on work/school.

       I also sleep very little and don’t see family and friends often. It’s really not fun but I hope it’s worth it.

13. IBR (income-based repayment) question for this smart crowd: I have private loans and federal loans. When I looked into this in the past, it seemed as though I couldn’t consolidate the two categories in such a way that would me to use IBR to cover both sets of loans. To be specific, I have about $18K in private loans and $40K in federal loans (after making substantial repayments over the years). Could I make monthly payments under IBR to service BOTH sets of loans? My salary is probably too high to get a lower monthly payment, but I work in public interest so I would want it to potentially benefit from the ten year forgiveness benefit.

    I had previously determined this wouldn’t benefit me because the private loans weren’t taken into account and my monthly payment came out to about the same. I was worried that I wouldn’t ultimately qualify for the forgiveness for one reason or another (changed jobs, changed law, etc) and thought there would be a potential downside if the lower payments weren’t covering the same amount I would pay were I not in that program.

    Anyone have any insight? I don’t know who to even talk to about looking into this at this point. I’ve been out of law school for about 5 years now, in public interest law for 3. Thanks!

    1. I don’t think that your payments will count towards forgiveness if you’ve been paying less than your IBR amount. Why don’t you ask your law school financial aid office?

       1. I’m assuming that my previous payments wouldn’t count (though they’re probably the same as what my IBR payments would look like). Calling the law school is a good idea, but I feel like they only deal with new grads for questions like these.

          1. Call the law school anyway, new grad or not.

    2. My husband and I are both doing the public service loan forgiveness program, so I am well acquainted with IBR and private/public loans. Unfortunately, you private loans are just that – private. They won’t be taken into consideration when calculating your IBR payment and there is no way to consolidate it to make them public. Sorry! It’s unfortunate because my private loan payments are about half of my IBR payment, but the private loans are only about 1/6 of my overall debt!

       1. Thanks, that was my understanding but someone suggested to me that you could so I thought I’d poke around further. Seems to undermine the point of the payment calculator, but it is what it is!

          1. Also, call FedLoan. If you get someone who is not helpful, ask for a supervisor. There are people there that can be very helpful. If you consolidated your loans in FedLoan and have been doing IBR for 3 years, those 3 years can count toward your 10 so you should really look into it (if you’ve been in public service those 3 years). There is no “enrollment” in the Public Loan Forgiveness Program, you can file proof of employment periodically so it’ll be easier at year 10, but there is no formal enrollment.

             It really is shocking how many people don’t take advantage of this program. It’s not always easy to learn all the information, but if you spend the time and figure it out it’ll be worth it!

    3. It doesn’t seem worth it to me to stretch out your payments another ten years. I honestly don’t see you being able to take advantage of the forgiveness with 40k left. And no, my understanding is you can’t do both, it would just be for the 40k.

       1. Well, working at a public interest salary, I may very well be paying these out for at least another ten years.

          1. Right but you don’t get IBR if you can pay it off under standard repayment in 10 years per the calculation.

14. Lands End PSA: they’ve extended their 30% off through the end of today. I just picked up a Squall Tote Bag, tankini top & 2 pairs of tights incl. shipping for $38 (less than the full price of either the bag or the tankini!). The Friends & Family offer covers clearance & sale stuff too.

15. L-O-V-E the plus-size pick, Kat!

16. Hello ladies,

    How do you control the urge to accept the first job that comes your way when you are looking for jobs. I am currently employed and there is no threat of job loss for me (at least for now). My manager told us what we will be doing next year and it doesn’t sound very interesting. I started looking for lateral positions from last week. I had told myself that as there is no threat of job loss, I should take my time and find something that is a good fit for me. I came across an opening very soon which I liked on paper. I spoke to the person in charge of hiring and it is not an ideal fit for me, though it is something that I can use as a stepping stone to what I eventually want. The hiring manager was very clear that he doesn’t want some one to come in for a brief time and use the job as a stepping stone. He was in fact very open and forwarded my resume to the group which would be my ideal fit. However, I can talk to him after thinking about the job role and if I can decide that I can stay there for a long term. The team which he referred me to will be talking to me some time in the next few days, but there is really nothing scheduled yet. Now, I am obsessed. I want to take up the not so ideal job because I am scared that I will end up with neither. This is kind of a job that I have been preparing for from last few years and that is adding to the anxiety.

    1. I dont understand the two separate jobs here – there’s the one you’d like to do as a stepping stone, and the one that you would step to? Or are there two positions that you are applying to at the same time?

       1. First job is not an ideal fit but would like to do as a stepping stone. Second is the one that would be an ideal fit. I applied for the first position. The person who interviewed me for the first position felt that I would be a better fit for the second position and sent my resume to that team. So indirectly I have applied to two jobs at the same time. The second team has got back to me and said they will schedule a meeting, but nothing is scheduled yet.

       2. ETA: Misunderstood OP’s situation.

          It sounds like there isn’t actually a dilemma. You don’t even have an offer for either job and the hiring manager himself said you’d be a better fit for the second job. You are currently employed in a stable job that will only become unappealing next year. You have plenty of time. What is there to decide?

          1. Exactly. This was my mentality when I started job hunting. I don’t want to be changing jobs just for the sake of changing jobs. Now, I am in some kind of fear that I will lose this and I will not get the position that I ideally want. I just have to some how remain calm, decline to continue with the current hiring process and look for the the position which will be a good fit for me.

       3. Also Wildkitten, I had written here a couple of weeks back about never ending work that had drained me. Thank you so much for answering/commiserating with me. I am done with that work. I am so relieved and I took a weekend vacation to celebrate the end of long, difficult and lonely stint of work :-)

17. I am 3L law student with some important interviews coming up. I’ve gained some weight recently and the only suit I currently have that I feel good is in a navy skirt suit. Usually, I would wear nude pumps with it, but because these are formal interviews, I feel like nude pumps would be inappropriate. Half the interviews are with state judges and the other half are with smallish firms. So should I wear my black pumps with the navy suit?

    Also, my usual interview/work bag is black. Is that ok with the navy suit? Suggestions?

    Thanks!

    1. Black with navy is fine.

    2. Black is fine but I don’t think the nude ones would be inappropriate.

    3. Black with navy works (I wear that combination all the time in court) and if your bag is also black, it will look more pulled together than with the nude pumps. Good luck!!

Comments are closed.