Business Casual Hall of Fame: Ab-Solution Denim

104 Comments

1. I really like these jeans, but I think they need heels, and will I ever have occasion to wear heels again?

   1. The skinny jeans trend also ruined my willingness to have multiple types of shoes for different pants. My skinny jeans work with whatever shoes I feel like wearing

2. I just did not like any era in fashion when jeans like this were in style. It’s not the jeans so much as what goes with them. I dread them coming back.

   1. I’ve been hearing that boot cuts/flares were coming back for probably 10 years now….

      1. I feel like they always look good with boots, so it depends on the footwear IMO. I don’t like western boots with skinny jeans, and my feet like western boots a lot.

      2. I used to wear boot cut and flare jeans all the time and had multiple pairs hemmed for different heel heights. I resisted skinny jeans at first, but now I won’t wear anything else. I don’t like wearing heels so I much prefer skinny jeans and flats. I guess because I wore flares/boot cuts the first time around they kind of look dated to me.

         1. They definitely look dated to me, but I’m so excited to have jeans that don’t make me look like an ice cream cone again!

            1. I always liken myself to an ice cream cone too! Won’t wear skinnies, no way, no how.

   2. I have these and they don’t look nearly so flared. Much more like a straight cut on. I’d call them more of a baby bootcut at most. Fabric is really stretchy and the waist thing is magic—I don’t even have to wear a belt. I found myself wearing them so much that I bought two more pair. I’m 5’8” and they were normal length on me. I was wearing them with my blondo boots all the time. I wear with slippers now.

      :(

      1. I love them.

         This cut is so flattering on my pear shape. Sometimes we forget that we all have very different bodies.

         Jeans are very individual, and are supposed to be comfortable and flattering. I would look like hell in high waisted Mom jeans, so…. why exactly?

      2. I might need to order them. I’m 5’10” so I assumed they would be way too short but if they fit you maybe I can get away with them with flats?

   3. I agree. Skinny jeans are meant to highlight our thighs and tuchuses and as long as we don’t have thick ankles, those also. I never liked flared jeans, which mom had in the 1960’s before I was born. She tried to give me an old pair, and they were big on me. Back then women were allowed to have a more hefty look then we can now. That is why we are always under so much pressure to look svelte now, b/c if we don’t, men will just ignore us. What gets me mad is that the men who ignore me are really nothing I want anyway. Most are sloppy looking, need a shave and a haircut, or just downright gross. We live with such doubel standards. Men can walk around looking like total messes, yet they think that we will just bow down to them b/c they are men and that they have the power over us to make us do whatever they want! Who are they kidding? It’s not like these schmoes are Brad Pit or anything like that! I never claimed to be Jennifer Anniston, so what are these guys thinking? FOOEY on them!

3. Does anyone have tips on throwing a virtual baby shower that is fun and unique? Are there any activities that lend themselves to that format, such as instant voting buzzes, quizzes, slideshow, etc?

   1. Following with interest – would love to do this for a family member!

   2. You may not see this, but I’m throwing one tomorrow for a friend! I’ll copy the email I sent to her sister below:

      I created a Zoom account so I can host meetings and send out invites, but you don’t need an account to join a meeting. With the free version there’s a 40-minute time limit on meetings. We can loop [Husband] in on the surprise (also can keep [son] occupied while this is going on lol), and get her to click the link at the designated time. If we get creative, we may even be able to coordinate a balloons/donut delivery or something special like that :-)

      Guests: Between 10 – 15 people is probably ideal

      Invite:
      -Encourage people to decorate their “background” with whatever they have in the house (wrapping paper, posterboard, etc). [Mama] chooses the winner to get a prize!
      -Encourage people to pour a mimosa or another special treat for when they join the digital shower
      -No gifts! This is just for fun to celebrate :-)

      Games:
      -Scavenger hunt- have a list of 5 baby-related items, the first person to collect them all and get back to their computer wins!
      -Name that Tune: We play a snippet of songs with the word “baby” in the title, and everyone has to guess who sings it. First person to get 5 right wins!
      -Embarrassing Baby Memory: Everyone goes around and says an embarrassing baby or childhood memory, [Mama] picks her favorite

      Prizes: Prizes can be a digital Starbucks or Chik Fil A gift card, sent over email or via Venmo

4. I like non-skinny jeans, but this bootcut is more like a flare. If it were a true bootcut, I’d be all over it.

5. I’m about 9 months into allergy shots (down from 3x/week to one every 7-10 days). I’m still miserable. Pollen is everywhere (SEUS). My arms hurt for about 24 hours after each shot. Does it get better? I am just as miserable as before, on the allergy front, but now with sore arms :(

   1. Yes, it does get better. I had to have allergy shots for over a year (Southern CA) before it made any difference, and ended up getting shots for 4 years before finally finishing maintenance doses. Now the chronic sinusitis has, more or less, disappeared, and allergy season is doable.

   2. took me two years to get to maintenance due to massive local erythema, but I went from needing steroid pulses during juniper season to just being very mildly annoyed. Persist!

6. Quite a few people on here mention that they are working more because they are involved in coronavirus response. I’m curious what that would be, besides drs and nurses. Anyone willing to share?

   1. I’m not necessarily working a lot more, but I work for a state government regulatory agency and we do have additional work to do to think through covid-related adjustments to regs and how to implement them.

   2. Wading through the CARES Act and guidance that seems to change daily. Trying to figure out how clients can get PPP loans to tide them though being shut down or reducing hours/staff (e.g., restaurant moving to take-out only).

   3. Policy consulting and data analysis for nursing facilities enacting COVID responses.

   4. I am going on 4 months at my new job, but I have 25 years on the field. Government guidance on how to bill for COVID-related services seems to change at least daily, sometimes hourly. Literally during meetings we will be told that we can not provide service X via telehealth, but by the end of the meeting that will have changed. Trying to stay current and stay sane is a huge challenge.

      1. The billing and coding changes related to telehealth will be the death of me. We launched Epic on 4/1 (for real) and trying to get the rules built has been a total joke.

   5. Public interest law – lots of questions about getting health insurance/how coverage has changed to do C-19, how unemployment affects other benefits, how the stimulus check will affect other benefits (or whether they’ll get one), housing/eviction issues, consumer law (tons of C-19 scams out there) and debt collection issues, etc.

   6. Lawyer here- lots of employment related issues and advising on regulatory changes (many of which change almost immediately). Also, family law and estate planning are busy. Accounting and banking friends are trying to navigate tax and loan questions.

   7. I’m a lawyer and all my clients really need a lot of guidance right now on everything

   8. University communication in the international affairs area. My administrative unit is responsible for study abroad, immigration/visas for international students and faculty, global operations, and international research (including all sorts of travel and grant award issues). It has been utter mayhem since mid-January, when we began to get wind of possible coming quarantine, illness, and travel issues for Chinese students just as students were returning for the spring semester.

   9. I’m only on the periphery of my company’s COVID work, but we have quite a few groups that are working harder than usual because of COVID, including: IT (to help move everyone from onsite to at home while keeping our data safe), legal (interpreting CARES etc., supporting purchasing of more equipment/infrastructure), finance, medical (for obvious reasons), and HR (dealing up with upset employees and managers). I’m sure there are other groups that I’m not thinking of.

   10. I’m not necessarily working more either – because days and days of hearings and negotiations were erased from my calendar – but I’m a lawyer whose clients are labor unions and there are so many issues right now that are requiring a lot of time. Some employers are doing layoffs and there are issues about unemployment, continued insurance benefits, etc.; at essential businesses and public employers, we are negotiating hazard pay and protective measures for the employees, as well as advising on issues such as disclosure of illness and exposure in the workplace, expanded FMLA leave and paid sick time for covered employers; some companies are staying open but should be closed and the employees and union might be pressing for a closure. The employment-related aspects of the new federal laws and changes to the state unemployment laws are myriad. Oh, and some companies have really stepped up in this crisis and some – currently a small nonprofit with an allegedly benevolent mission that is trying to force 40-60% pay cuts on some employees – see this situation as a perfect time to scr*w their workers. In the last three weeks, I’d say 50-60% of my time has been dealing with coronavirus-related issues.

       1. Labor lawyer here – on the other side. I’m terrified of what my schedule will look like when hearings and negotiations come flooding back (and all the travel that goes with it).

   11. HR at a major healthcare system. Easily working 1.5x as much as usual.

   12. public transit

   13. Criminal defense lawyer. Working on both a coordinated push to get large groups of high-risk from a health standpoint but low-risk from a public safety standpoint clients out as well as identify individual clients and file individual motions. Also everything but jury trials are still happening over telephone and video in our courthouses.

       1. I’m on the other side — prosecutor doing DV work. There’s more cases coming in, dealing with them is tougher because we have fewer resources for victims and can’t meet with anyone in real life, and defense attorneys are (understandably) trying to get all the incarcerated defendants out while we are trying to keep our victims safe from their abusers. Family courts are closed as well, so we’re dealing with issues that we would normally let family courts handle.

   14. GC of a company that is uniquely and significantly impacted by the pandemic. Can’t say more because there’s literally no one else in our position and it would out me.

       1. Oh man I want to guess now so hard!

          1. My guess is 3M or Zoom.

             1. Biogen!

       2. An airline or hotel, or an industry-dependent company is my guess (ex: payment processor with airlines and/or hotels forming a significant percentage of its merchant base).

          1. Or a rental-car company; they seem to have been hit just like the airlines.

          2. That’s not really unique. American/United/Delta are all in the exact same boat, as are Marriott/Hilton/IHG and Hertz/Avis/Enterprise.
             I like the Zoom guess. Or Slack.

       3. Could also be any manufacturer of ventilators, swabs or whatever testing equipment is in short supply.

       4. I am going with Foxconn.

   15. You would not believe how many government regulations have been modified to account for the virus and for those of us who are lobbyists, we are watching states and the feds turn out legislative packages to deal with the virus and its economic effects so yes, lots of work.

   16. I work in local government doing emergency management

       1. Emergency manager here: I normally work 37.5 hours a week and now work 70-75, my workload literally doubled.

   17. In-house legal counsel / risk management for a large healthcare organization.

   18. I work for a company that manufactures products and our business unti supplies into the defense industrial base and comm aerospace and certain energy markets. We are considered essential under all state governor orders where our BU has plants in the US but have other plants around the world being shut down by various government orders. We have to constantly monitor this, monitor our supply chain, run simulations in plants for shutting down and moving equipment, getting finished goods out of plants before they have to shut down, finding alternative suppliers, figure out alternative logistics, evaluate whether we can extend more favorable payment terms to suppliers who are struggling, interpret govt orders and work with government affairs to work with govt officials to either stay open or cooperate with local orders, draft correspondence and communications to customers, review contracts for force majuere clauses and am make sure we are in compliance, advise internal customers on legal and contractual positions, etc., etc.

   19. HR – maybe not more than usual but much more ad hoc / surprise stuff than things I had planned on doing.

   20. Lawyer who represents an airline. We have been busy with border closures and passenger screening changes that have brought travel to a standstill, managing contracts, and customer restrictions. Everyone in house there has been insanely busy since this began.

   21. labor and employment lawyer, we are laying everyone off and helping navigate new paid sick leave.

   22. I work for Amazon. Work is nuts. I don’t think I have had the chance to even sit down on my sofa since late February. I am always at my home desk. I work and sleep, and have the occasional video call with my parents on the opposite coast.

   23. Econ policy for a federal financial regulatory agency. We’re pretty busy.

   24. I’m still trying to do my regular job plus working on the university’s response to students who are struggling with the transition to online. We’re providing technology, counseling referrals, academic support, health services, whatever. It’s pretty exhausting and heartbreaking.

   25. Biologist.

   26. Not really “COVID Response” but definitely related- I’m a mortgage loan originator at a large bank. Have had a ton of calls about payment deferrals, refinances since rates are so low, and PPP even though I have nothing to do with that- my clients don’t want to wait on hold on the correct line so they call me because they think I can do something. Have also talked to a ton of realtors about how we’re working around/doing no contact appraisals, reassuring people things will still close, etc.

   27. Not me, but people I know: Health insurance executives tasked with figuring out how to pay for all this and how to keep the current client base happy and answer their questions; manufacturer of commercial kitchen equipment (have to keep producing / serving to ensure that hospitals are served and to ramp up operations for things like the convention centers that are being turned into hospitals); pharma sales rep who represents a monitor that is used on heart patients (nothing to do with Covid, but the need doesn’t go away just bc Covid is here); company that makes the pallets that are used by Sam’s / Costco (can’t ship the toilet paper if you don’t have a pallet to ship it on); operations manager at a major home-improvement store; HR manager at that same store, figuring out how to keep workers safe and hire new workers as needed.

       1. girl no one wants your anecdotal evidence.

   28. Life insurance; our underwriting guidelines and medical requirements are changing extremely quickly in regards to shelter in place and lockdowns and that type of thing. We are having to set the guidelines and then determine how to best disseminate the information in ways that are doable while working 100% remotely.

   29. Work in child welfare legal system – – juvenile dependency cases. Case loads have increased significantly. Working 12-14 hours a day, 6 or 7 days a week.

   30. Executuve communications in the HQ of a multinational. Busy sending info out, getting info in, strengthening processes for pushing info up and down the org so that we all have the information we need to keep the business running.

   31. In my social circle, these people are: professors (managing students’ anxieties and stresses is more than the usual workload), social workers (both in hospitals and care facilities and in general practice), licensure tutors (many studying to pass exams in their new spare time), those working with people with autism and other neuroatypical people who are struggling without their usual schedule, city officials, event planners (having to reschedule or rearrange events), and educators (trying to teach plus move things online plus manage parents)

   32. Working in a water company here,
       trying to keep all the infrastructure open and guarantee an optimal and safe service for all.

       (Can I l vent? I canceled a summer trip due to the needs of my company and the person who organized it asked me “could you remind me what your job was about?”)

   33. I work for a federal agency that is responsible for monetary policy.

   34. Higher ed lawyer. The increase in work due to COVID-19 would include advice related to decisions to get students off campus, switch to distance learning, refund issues, financial aid concerns, students still on campus (think: international students who cannot return home, homeless students, students who cannot get home), telehealth, the whole range of employment concerns (new FFCRA leave provisions, telework issues, collective bargaining aspects, visa concerns, voluntary separation program, employment contract terminations and layoff concerns, etc.), inability to perform certain types of research, financial shortfall, review of all kinds of service contracts, both with an eye to terminating or suspending some and entering into others for tech needed for increased distance learning, requests to use campus facilities for pandemic related reasons, and on and on. Of course, the usual issues don’t disappear, so still dealing with those, as well.

   35. Not me, but my husband’s in Emergency Planning at a hospital in NYC. Tomorrow will be his first day of in 68 days.

       Also, thinking of hospitals as “doctors and nurses” is simplistic. There are environmental workers, lab techs, operation and acquisition management, carpenters, plumbers, food workers, billing, lawyers, social workers, respiratory therapists, physical therapists, an army of HR, schedulers, lab managers, project managers, care managers. It’s a small hospital and they have 20,000 full time employees.

   36. Philanthropy for human services org – we had a major fundraising series cancel and now have never been busier trying to develop an whole new multi-layered outreach to make up the shortfall of funds that would have been raised.

       1. Sort of the same boat. Media company (b2b —readers work mostly essential businesses), but loss of trade shows and threat for the future is cutting into a big part of why folks advertise (preshow and after messaging) and to some degree audience development (we had access to registrant data with some) that will hurt us for at least a year. So a lot of hustling to try to find other ways to sell and update audience. It’s sort of a bad chain of events that isn’t directly obvious as threatening our business but still hurts.

   37. Estate planning and probate attorney. Most of the increased time has been around changing processes with a bit of an uptick in actual work, and then some extra hours just trying to get new documents out the door twice as fast (1-2 weeks vs. 3-4). Changing ALL of my forms (hearings are held electronically so documents are signed away from court, estate planning documents can now be signed virtually but the signature blocks need to reflect that, etc.) and constantly changing procedures that need to be related to clients ends up sucking a lot of time. I have had FOUR conversations with the same client about how we will sign their documents–the rules have changed that often in the amount of time it’s taken them to review their documents–and they have not yet scheduled a time to sign. The hand-holding is part of what I love about my job but is getting very old. I have five more sets of documents to write, I do not have time to walk you through this week’s procedures. Just let me know when you’re ready and we’ll go from there. But… that’s not a thing you can say to your clients when you’re worried the economy is going to be hurting for a long time and you’ve already lived through life as a lawyer in 2008/9.

   38. Medicaid finance in a hard hit state.

   39. Power Company. Gotta keep the lights on while most of the company WFH and the people who have to be in the field practice social distancing, etc. Things that have never been done before.

   40. This is a really interesting thread. Thanks for all the good work you all do, everyone–in every field. I’m quietly amazed to think of all of us working remotely and pulling off a multipronged response to this crisis.

   41. Government relations for a large financial services company. We are both federally and state regulated and care about all the executive orders, legislative and regulatory actions and ever changing rules for our industry. And we also announced a huge credit to our customers this week so lots going on for sure! And looking forward to what happens next.

7. For the first time, I see a job posting for an in-house job that I want to apply for. Any resources for salary ranges for in-house jobs? I am familiar with the Robert Half Legal salary guide.

   1. Glassdoor?

8. I have decided that when the world opens up again, I want to go to a Rhiannon Giddens concert. I live in the SEUS, so there could be a variety of festivals where she plays vs a just-her concert. Either would be fine. But what does one wear to such events (I am used to extremes — DC’s 9:30 Club-type places / Birchmere or classical music concerts). Is there where I could wear the above jeans and a pair of Frye boots and some sort of top and be OK? I feel that I fail the whole category of “awesome casual outfits” but do OK with workwear, a useless skill (but Deposition Outfits — Advanced Similar and Practicum? I’m THERE).

   1. Yes, the outfit you describe is totally okay for a music festival.

   2. Just add something sparkly or funky for your top, with the jeans and boots.

   3. Just have to chime in to say that I saw her at Jazz Fest a few years ago and she was just phenomenal live. One of the best shows I’ve ever seen. That’s an awesome goal. Need to think about who I want to put on my list . . .

9. This is for you healthcare workers. Much love to you

   https://youtu.be/ZZLAaCZVV2g

   1. OMG so much ugly crying here.

      Thanks for that, Anon.

   2. Just beautiful.

   3. Wonderful.

      I am loving all these “virtual ensemble” videos that are circulating, but I can’t figure out exactly how they are produced. Does anyone know anything about the technology and logistics of putting together this type of recording? My choir director is a total technophobe, and I’d love to be able to point him in the right direction.

      What impressed me about this particular performance is that there was obviously some attention to coordinating the phrasing and dynamics. Other recordings I’ve seen are of smaller groups that are either recording individually while listening to just the accompaniment or layering one track on top of another, leading to a less cohesive sound. Maybe this choir rehearsed together with something like Zoom and then recorded individually?

      1. I’m fascinated by this too.

      2. I think typically the singers receive the recorded instrumental music and sing the whole thing, then some tireless editor puts in the work to patch it together

      3. But to your point about rehearsal, this choir has been around for a long time, and this song may just be part of their repertoire

         1. Yeah, this song was originally done for pediatric cancer research fundraising by this chorus a couple of years back (thanks YouTube rabbit hole). But still really impressive to get everyone together virtually and have very minimal lag.

            1. Wow that makes me cry even harder, thinking of this being aimed at pediatric cancer patients and caregivers.

10. Can any Peloton owners speak to whether it’s hard to adjust the bike quickly if you’re sharing it with a much taller roommate / partner. Can you do more relaxed rides also or high resistance rides?

    1. My husband is more than a foot taller than me and its super easy. We only adjust the seat up/down but that takes about 30 seconds. The handlebars are harder to move if you prefer different heights (we both like them all the way up) and adjusting the seat forward/backward can be annoying but I don’t like to move it forward even though I’m short as I find doing so puts too much pressure on my knees so I keep the seat in the same position.

       1. Also forgot to add there is a HUGE library of rides that range from very easy to very difficult and everything in between.

       2. I dated a guy a foot taller then me in college, and it was ackward, b/c the top of my head was not even up to his chin, and I felt very strange even wearing 4″ heels, b/c then I was still shorter then he was. He liked me alot and wanted to go further faster then I wanted so I broke up with him after 2 weeks.

    2. I love mine, but I’ll be honest, I’m glad my husband has only used it about 10 times total, because every time I’ve had to adjust it back down, it’s been kind of annoying. But that just goes to show you how lazy I am and how badly I need a Peloton.

11. Paging BigLaw Bankruptcy Lawyer who is in a Toxic Environment – I’ve been meaning to respond to your posts but have always read them too late. I’ve read what you’ve said here before about trying to find an in-house job. I have worked at 2 big law firms, in-house, a mid-sized firm and a small firm over the years and they are all very different jobs. It sounds like you need to get out of a toxic environment because it will affect your self esteem, confidence and your mental health if you continue to stay there. So, my advice for you is to either switch out of your group (if that’s possible at your firm) and work with different, non-toxic people, or look for a job – any job – even if it’s not in-house. I tried in-house and while the hours were great, I was laid off during the recession so I’m assuming that there won’t be a ton of in-house positions open over the next year. I also tried to find another in-house job soon after that (while at a mid-sized firm) and even with my previous in-house experience (plus jd from HYS, Ivy undergrad, and 5 years at the tippy top of BigLaw firms), I could not get one after several years of trying. So, I’m not trying to discourage you but to suggest that giving midlaw or small law a try is worth it! I am happier than ever before at my very small firm with no name but high comp and a ton of autonomy and flexibility. I hope your situation improves soon!

12. Any tips for attempting to take my own headshot? I have two invites to speak on virtual panels this month, but need to provide a headshot and I don’t have one. I have an iPhone with a timer and a suit and live alone during quarantine. Also I hate having my picture taken, hence why I do not have said headshot. Hints? Tips?

    1. Amazon sells ring lights that can work with your phone or computer for about $20. Worth their weight in gold. Position your camera eye length or slightly higher.

    2. Overdo your makeup just a hair beyond what you normally would do, particularly blush and lipstick. Take the photo in the mid-morning or late afternoon (10am/4-5pm) with all-natural light. If possible, face a window with blinds fully open with darker space behind you. Propping your phone on the windowsill would be ideal! Turn your body so your shoulders are not directly facing the camera, but at a slight angle ~45degreen, and turn your face towards the camera.

13. Not sure I’m posting this early enough to get an answer…I’ve never dyed my dark brown hair but am getting lots of FB ads for Overtone. It seems like a fun quarantine project to order and use the purple. (1) Is this a terrible idea? (2) Any Overtone reviews out here?

    1. How conservative is your office? The color is likely to be pretty subtle (mostly show in sunlight) but may take much longer than you think to lift out fully. OT is not a permanent color, but despite their marketing, it is a dye in that it deposits color. It’s semipermanent and is likely to last maybe six weeks, unless your hair is especially porous (for instance, you have bleach or highlights)–in those porous areas, it could be visible for a long time.

       All of this said: Yeah, it sounds like a fun project. My office is on the dressy end of business casual, and I think people would be totally amused if I or another colleague came back with the remnants of a wacky color. We get our fun where we can these days.

       1. This is all good advice. I mean, I wouldn’t dye my hair purple if these were normal times, but no one will bat an eye at leftover purple after a multiple-month quarantine. This is pushing me to do it!

    2. I have dark brown hair and used the purple — I put it on the bottom 2/3 of my hair since i had some highlights that were growing out. It washed out in about 10 days (I used it before a one week vacation). I found that it gave my hair more of a purplish-reddish tint rather than straight purple. When I talked to my hair stylist about it after the fact, she said I could’ve just used Manic Panic for less money (and added benefit of doing something I never dared to do during my late 90s/early 2000s HS years!). If you go for it (my vote is yes, because why not?), use vaseline around your hairline so that you don’t dye your skin and be careful with bathroom linens. It dyed my bathtub purple for a few weeks, but it all washed off with time and light scrubbing.

14. Punky Colour is another easy semipermanent product to use. Yes, I would not choose OT myself. You pay a lot for the cheap conditioner they use as the base. https://www.ulta.com/semi-permanent-conditioning-hair-color?productId=xlsImpprod1680059

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