For busy working women, the suit is often the easiest outfit to throw on in the morning. In general, this feature is not about interview suits for women, which should be as classic and basic as you get — instead, this feature is about the slightly different suit that is fashionable, yet professional.
Eco-friendly suits are few and far between, so I’m excited that *some* of the suiting at L.K. Bennett is in their Conscious line.
Although the brand notes that it has “always championed slow fashion,” they’ve committed to further reducing their impact with the LKB Conscious line. They describe these steps as including “the materials we use, the suppliers we work with, and the packaging we wrap and deliver our pieces in.”
This navy skirt suit looks great – I love the pleat details on the pockets and the high neckline. I do wish the skirt had a few more inches on it, but perhaps that’s the model.
(Also: this is an excellent example of wearing flats with a skirt suit, which can be a bit tricky.)
The skirt is $270, and the blazer is $450; both pieces are available in sizes 2-14.
This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support!
As of 2023: If you’re hunting for eco-friendly clothes to wear to work, check out major brands like Boden, Eileen Fisher, H&M Conscious, Karen Kane, L.K. Bennett, Theory, Hobbs, and Ted Baker — Nordstrom also has a big section devoted to sustainable style! You can also check out smaller eco-friendly workwear brands like Aday, Amour Vert, Cuyana, Everlane, Emerson Fry, Grana, Reformation and Wallis Evera.
Wondering where to find eco-friendly suits for women? H&M has affordable options in their Conscious line. Theory has a number of options, and NET-A-PORTER has some expensive options like Another Tomorrow in their NET SUSTAIN section.
Workwear sales of note for 5.26.23:
- Nordstrom – The Half-Yearly Sale just started! See our thoughts here.
- Amazon – Memorial Day Sales! Lots of discounts on Amazon Essentials and more.
- Ann Taylor – Extra 30% off lots of sale styles (prices as marked).
- Anthropologie – Extra 40% off sale.
- Banana Republic Factory – 50%-70% off everything + extra 25% off purchase (ends 5/31).
- Boden – Sale, up to 50% off.
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off sale; already up to 70% off (ends 5/31) – also mix & match sale with men’s shirts, 4 for $249.
- Cole Haan – Up to 50% off sale styles (ends 5/31).
- Eloquii – 400+ styles starting at $19; up to 50% off everything.
- Express – Summer kickoff sale, 30-50% off everything (plus $35+ steals) (ends 6/1).
- H&M – Up to 60% off online and in-store.
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off “dressed up” styles (lots of cute dresses!).
- J.Crew Factory – 50% off everything, no exclusions.
- J.McLaughlin – The Sale Event, extra 30% off.
- Loft – 40% off full-price styles
- M.M.LaFleur – Short but sweet sale (ends 6/1).
- Madewell – Get 30% off your purchase.
- Ministry of Supply – 25% off sitewide (ends 6/1).
- Sephora – Up to 50% off select beauty.
- Shopbop – Up to 50% off designer sale!
- Sue Sartor – Lots of cute dresses on sale!
- Talbots – Extra 40% off all markdowns (ends 6/1)!
- Theory – Up to 60% off + an extra 20% off.
- Universal Standard – 25% off sitewide (ends 6/1).
Other noteworthy sales:
- CB2.com – Up to 50% off everything!
- Joss & Main – Up to 60% off, plus an extra 20% off with code.
- Tuft & Needle – Save up to $775 on mattresses. (Reader favorite bed brand; Kat really likes hers!)
- West Elm – Memorialy Day Sale, up to 60% off.
I was invited to a dinner with executives as part of a leadership program my F100 company offers. It’s a big opportunity, but the restaurant is in the immediate vicinity of where a close family member committed suicide. I’ve been through a lot of therapy to cope, yet still had a physical reaction when I saw the restaurant name. I have avoided going to this location for the last decade, but I think not showing up to the dinner would seriously hurt my career at this company. Since it’s months away I am sure if they knew they would move it, but I don’t want to share this. Is there anything I can do? I am having trouble thinking rationally about this.
Talk to your therapist about making a plan!
I think you use this opportunity to come to terms with the fact that the location is not what caused your relative to die. In your shoes, I’d go to the restaurant alone or with a support person before the corporate occasion in order to get that first time over quit.
Unfortunately the location had specific meaning to my family which I suspect is why it was selected. It’s not just a random location. But I think this approach is probably what my therapist would suggest if I decide to go.
TW suicide (I guess this thread is, but it’s there anyway)
My uncle completed suicide on his boat. He got in an argument with my aunt, threatened to take his life, got drunk, and did so. It was horrible. It wasn’t about the boat. A lot of things got him to that spot in life where he was so desperate he saw no other way out. He was in his mid-30s and I was a teenager, as were my cousins. We’re all older than he ever lived to. I think about it that a lot, and will never stop thinking about it. But I also very firmly believe it it hadn’t been the boat, it would have been something else. He was in such depression and despair he didn’t see a way out. And our family didn’t talk about it due to stigma and excuses.
I think that’s what the poster at 2:27 means. Your loss isn’t about the restaurant. If not there, it would have been somewhere else. An entire tragic series of events leads up to the moment when someone takes their life. It’s really hard to accept because you feel like, “if only I had done something”. Maybe it wouldn’t have happened on that day at that place, but it can be hard to someone once their mind is made up.
Definitely something to further explore in therapy.
That’s fair and I don’t mean to discount that. It’s more just the feelings of “returning to the scene of the crime” than feeling like the location caused it. It is probably worth exploring if I decide to go back to therapy about this, just not sure it’s worth it for a one time thing. I don’t think I’ll ever go there on my own just because there’s no need so why put myself through it?
I think this dinner is the why you put yourself through it. It’s potentially a great opportunity for you. I promise the first time you are there will be the hardest.
I’ve had to get through this myself. Hugs to you.
Yes. Sometimes the universe pushes us to heal, even if we don’t want to.
This will depend on your organization, but can you reach out to whomever picked the restaurant and explain the situation (as little or as much as you feel like you can share- perhaps your therapist can suggest some language).
IME this is usually a spot picked by an admin. It could be moved and none of the execs would be any the wiser as to why.
In this situation, I wouldn’t feel obliged to be 100% honest. You can just say a family member died tragically nearby. I would either imply a car accident or just directly lie and say it was one. It gives a window into your feelings without opening the house up completely.
+1 to emailing the organizer. I would also include some alternate location suggestions in your email.
Like others said below, even if you work through coping strategies or medication to attend this event, you won’t be your usual amazing self at the dinner.
I would talk to your therapist about this. They might have strategies for you. This will follow you for this rest of your life, so maybe this is something your therapist can help you through.
I’m so sorry this happened to you and your family.
Therapy. You have enough time to work on some strategies to help. If the day comes and you can’t do it, you tell them you got sick.
I have had years of therapy on this and my most recent therapist thinks I have gotten as far as I’m going to with it. I am able to talk about it and deal with it, but going to the actual location is a whole different animal and not something we worked on because why it’s not somewhere I’d ever go on my own anyway.
Given that this is a one-time incident, could you discuss if medication could be helpful for getting through it? You might have to experiment with a dosage that is comfortable for you but that might help make the dinner bearable.
Thanks this is a good option to explore!
Have you explored EMDR specific to the location? You have enough time before the dinner to give it ago if you haven’t already.
Actually, the EMDR idea is fantastic. OP, I hope you talk with your therapist about this. Even if your therapist hasn’t done this before, they should be able to read about it and help you. It really isn’t that hard at all, but can be amazingly effective.
If years of therapy have not helped you to a point where you can visit this area, then I think you skip the dinner.
I’m sure others would disagree, but if it’s possible to skip it, I would skip it. I don’t think I would be able to fully engage in conversation or be fully present at this dinner, which could look worse than not going.
Native New Yorker
Its been over 20 years and I still can’t go too close without a physical reaction. Hands getting shaky just typing this.
I’m sorry OP, this is really hard.
+1. Its one dinner, in a lifetime of business dinners. And this internet stranger gives you full permission to skip for the sake of your mental health.
+3 I think going and seeming out of it will be much worse than not going. Can you just say you’re sick the day of? If it’s a one time thing, that should be a valid excuse especially in these Covid times. And since it’s related to your mental health it’s not really a lie.
Since you don’t want to share this information, and you don’t think therapy will help at this point, I would make plans to go and then come down with a last minute illness that causes you to miss the event. And don’t feel bad for a single second about missing the event.
If you’re comfortable sharing as much as you’ve shared here, I’d ask for the dinner to be moved. If not, I’d say I was going and come down with a last-minute illness. It sounds like you’ve addressed this in therapy enough to be able to live your day-to-day life, and the fact that this restaurant was chosen was a coincidence that’s unlikely to be repeated. I can understand not wanting more therapy just to get through one dinner, and I don’t know that it would work on a timeline. (This is different from my cousin who, at 40 and living in a rural area of a southern state, refuses to drive because our cousin died in a car accident when we were 16.)
I worked with my therapist to “re do” some painful, traumatic memories associated with places. She told me now that I’m an adult, I can rewrite the story to have positive associations. Maybe this is a helpful framing?
That’s really hard. Since it is months away, do you think it would be realistic to talk to your former therapist and see what they think about going there with you for a session? Or if they think it would be productive or detrimental for you to try going there with a support person a few times and having some sessions around the same time? It’s possible this would be a very bad idea and it’s possible it may move you towards more resolution of this experience-that’s not something as outsiders we can really assess. If you get to like three months out and you aren’t comfortable going then you can ask for it to be moved.
+1 I think it’s worth doing some kind of therapy related to this. I imagine that as the dinner’s date comes closer, your tension around this event is going to increase, even if you don’t plan on attending. You’ll still know others are going to be there, you’ll still be thinking about the event, and you’ll still be feeling torn regarding the career implications. If you can find ways to ease this tension, it would be worthwhile, even if you don’t attend the dinner.
I agree with those who say skip it. You won’t be fully present, and a missed dinner is no big deal – and better than one that causes you real pain.
That said if you do decide to go, I would visit the location at least once or more times BEFOREHAND. Don’t make a public social event your first encounter. A close family member of mine committed suicide almost 20 years ago. It was 7 years afterwards that I went back to a place that had a lot of associations and I did not hold things together. I don’t think I could have under ant circumstances. It was still awful when i returned the next day, but I didn’t fall apart quite as completely.
I’m so sorry. At times like this I remember that grief is just love that still needs a place to go, and I try to let all my love get to him so he knows how much we cared. It hurts but it helps, just a little.
Any anecdata about expedited passport times recently? I know they say it can take up to 5 weeks but anecdotally I’ve heard it’s a lot less. It was received on Dec. 23 and is still “in processing.” I know the holidays are a factor but I’m so anxious to get it! I hate the feeling of being without a passport.
That was two weeks ago, chill!
Almost 3 weeks ago. But yeah I know it’s within the range of what they say it can take, I’ve just heard from people that it’s normally a lot faster.
It’s normally also a lot slower, too. You just have to wait it out.
It won’t be a lot faster with Christmas and New Year holidays that week, as you note, so plan for the 5 weeks and be pleasantly surprised if it comes in 4.
Two weeks if you take into account the two different holidays that happened during that time. Calm down.
I’d give it at least 4 weeks, especially since a lot of people are on vacation during the holidays.
I posted here a while ago for advice about something similar. My new husband forgot to double check the expiration date on his personal passport until like 2 weeks before our honeymoon. Even though I repeatedly asked him to. And I told him I was pretty sure his govt passport, which he had recently traveled on, has a different expiration date that his personal passport. When he finally checked it, yeah it was expired. The first appointment within a 500 mile radius was something like 5 hours before our flight and was a 2 hour drive from the airport. He was perfectly happy with this and I was… not. On the advice given here, he called his local congresspeople and they were able to get him an appointment 2 days earlier than that. He walked out that day with his passport and we had a wonderful vacation. So thanks, all!
Idk if you can still take advantage of that if you’ve already sent in your passport? He had his expired passport in hand.
We’re looking to relocate to the exurbs of a new metro area. We’re looking for our Goldilocks house, and there are nice towns in every direction, and since we don’t have any ties to one town over another, we’re agnostic about where we end up – we just want the perfect house. The area we’re looking in is about 80 miles across (so 40 miles from downtown, which one of us would need to access once a week or so for work).
How do we hire a realtor? Do we engage a couple for the various clumps of exurbs and let them know we’re working with someone else on the other side of town if we find a house out that way?
So far on trips to town, we’ve gone to open houses for houses we liked or have asked the listing agent to show us the house. That’s been fine, but we’d like an agent working for us, but I don’t know how to go about it.
I’d keep going to open houses to narrow down which exurb you prefer. You may find a realtor specialized in some adjacent exurbs, but probably not one in the 80 mile radius.
The exurbs are definitely not all the same, so I’d be looking to make connections somehow to compare them in order to narrow it down.
Apologies if I wasn’t clear. It’s not that all the towns are the same; there are of course towns we aren’t interested in. But there are good towns in every direction, north, south, east, and west, and we really don’t care if we end up in Pretty Northern Town or Quaint Southern Town or Adorable Eastern Town. These towns are 50, 60, 80 miles apart, so one agent can’t cover them all. If we wait to hire an agent until we see a perfect listing pop up in, say, Adorable Eastern Town, we may miss out on the house, so we’d like agents lined up and at least familiar with us.
Find something else to focus on — where do you know anyone? I refuse to commute from the west — the sun is in your eyes both ways. I’ve done it before and will never do it again. So there is that. But if you have friends or friends-of-friends anywhere, I’d start with those places if my no-western-towns rule isn’t enough for you.
I would be surprised if realtors would be ok sharing your business based on where you end up picking. We had to sign a contract to avoid this type of setup
I’m in NY suburbs. We had one realtor for one part of Westchester county (she knew 3 towns), another for a different part (she knew 1 town) and a third for CT. It’s just what you have to do. We were honest with each that we were looking at the other towns.
Not sure what areas of the country they cover (more than just NYC), but we had an initial consultation with Suburban Jungle before we started looking. They were kind of helpful in providing us with information on the different suburbs. Could be helpful to you?
I mean, this is not unheard of when you get to more rural areas, or even many exurbs/suburbs of metro areas. If you vibe with one of the real estate agents at an open house talk to them about your situation, see if they’d be interested or if they know anyone who does wider area territory showings. The realtor I worked with to sell my houses had listing in easily a 40-50 mile radius of where my house was. He was a road warrior though and did an excellent job for me and sold it with connections. The person I bought from would show houses all over, obviously it just needed to be a bit more scheduled.
I recommend buying with Redfin. “Buyer’s” realtors aren’t as useful as they once were, given…. the internet. All you really need them to do is to get you inside houses you’ve flagged that you want to see. I’d imagine a Redfin realtor can cover any geography where Redfin has a presence. And you get a check back!
I used Redfin to buy my house and had a great experience.
Do good, soft merino sweaters exist? I feel like even the good cashmere I’ve bought lately is scratchy, bulky, and way too warm, whereas cotton is way too thin. I feel like silk blends are the holy grail but there’s such a limited selection…
I’ve done well with merino sweaters from Uniqlo and Banana Republic
I’ve had good luck with Banana Republic’s washable merino wool and Talbot’s merino wool (dry clean). Soft and thin, but warm enough.
I have cashmere from JCrew and washable merino from Gap. Cashmere is obviously softer than merino, but the merino ones don’t bother me at all to wear next to my skin. Mine are several seasons old now so I don’t know how they compare to current offerings, although they were from several different seasons and quality was consistent across years.
I have a couple of merino sweaters from Universal Standard that are very soft & not itchy.
Paging Long Covid
Yesterday the Long Covid poster received lots of kind advice, but not all of it was accurate. CBT can be really harmful to people with chronic illness by putting the blame back on them. Exercise is also really risky until your body is ready, you should be resting and not push yourself. Read about the scandal of the PACE trial where insurance companies successfully manipulated medical research until patients call out the harm of CBT and exercise.
In the old days there were sanitariums for resting but now when people get sick, especially in the US with appalling sick leave, there’s pressure to be up’n’att’em quickly.
ME Action will have lots of resources so I’d recommend them. People with MECFS have been fighting this for decades so they know what they are talking about.
I mean she literally said she is doing CBY and it is helpful.
In the old days, hospitals had new mothers in bed for days after their baby was born. We need rest and we need appropriate excercise when recovering from any illness. What is dangerous is having no guidance on what kind of exercise and how long. There are all kinds of chair excercises for people who have chronic fatigue.
OP, I have to firmly disagree.
I have cared for several individuals with severe chronic disease and horrible neurologic symptoms/deficits, and you don’t seem to understand how CBT works at all. It can be very effective for chronic illness – particularly with severe symptoms like chronic pain. It has nothing to do with ??putting blame on the patient. If that is your experience then perhaps you had a bad clinician or the people who you know who had it had difficult managing it or ??? and sometimes not everything works for everyone.
If anything, therapy/anti-depressants are not used enough with chronic illness, as we well know that the co-incidence of anxiety+depression/chronic illness is very high and under-recognized, and each feed on one another and it is essential to treat both for both to improve / long term progress. And CBT can be very helpful as an adjunct for improving quality of life.
There are many, many folks out there with severe chronic disease
CBT is an appropriate therapy for “cognitive behavioral” problems. These can accompany chronic illness, but when illness is the real problem, framing it as an issue of maladaptive beliefs or behavioral choices constitutes gaslighting. It’s easy to see how people’s experiences might diverge.
And some not so great therapists have learned a lot about how patients “adopt the sick role for secondary gain” or out of a “fear of success” and struggle not to insinuate that even very serious illnesses are somehow the patient’s own fault.
Antidepressants can be dangerous when misprescribed to patients whose chronic illness is not accompanied by medical depression. They’re not the kind of medications that just take someone wherever they’re at and make them feel a bit better from there.
Again, you misunderstood my points entirely. CBT is used all the time when illness is the real problem, diagnosed or not, and for symptom management. Pain, my example, is not a maladaptive belief or behavioral choice, but a symptom from numerous etiologies. And I am not saying you do not find the source of the illness/symptom, and use additional treatments and symptom management. Of course you do that.
The original OP was asking for help/advice and CBT was included under the many options to consider.
You think people with chronic pain due to having their arm ripped off their body and having chronic neuropathic pain are lying when they get decreased pain perception and improved quality of life using CBT? I don’t think any respected clinician with a patient missing an arm is having a “cognitive behavioral” problem and not real pain?
I agree that getting the support and narrow interpretations that you seem to be restricting yourself to is not what you will find on this website. And frankly, your mischaracterizations are offensive to people who get good responses from many treatments that complement traditional medicines/interventions. But I suspect you are suffering, and like many women with undiagnosed chronic medical problems and unsympathetic and uneducated doctors (I hear you there…), are doing your best. I am so sorry for that.
I think you might really appreciate looking at some of the NIH invited lectures from some amazing scientists looking at these issues.
The studies using function MRI brain imaging are just staggering.
And in general…. no. Antidepressants are not dangerous in the way you imply, and are used in patients without typical clinical depression all the time with good success – in particular, neuropathic pain, migraine, MS, cancer etc..
Paging Long Covid
You don’t understand how CBT has been cruelly applied to ME, CFS and now long Covid.
I urge you to read https://www.meaction.net/2019/04/03/get-and-cbt-are-not-safe-for-me-summary-of-survey-results/
Paging Long Covid
This is for Anon at 7.49 (Anon at 9.36 explained well, thanks).
You said you’ve “cared for” which is very different from being sick yourself.
If you are who I think you are, I think you’ve heard this before: this is not the appropriate place for you to get unequivocal, uncritical co-signs of your ideas about chronic illness management. We aren’t the right support community for you. I’m sure there are plenty of subreddits that aren’t aimed at active career women where you can find the support and dialogue you’re looking for. I just don’t think this is your tribe, sorry. Because it seems to me your identity as a person with a chronic illness as the central organizing principle of your identity, and I’m not sure that’s true of the majority of people here.
This hits home. Memories of leaving hospital unable to walk comfortably after childbirth. I’ve seen people to go ER in less g to pain than I was in. Maddening.
“CBT can be really harmful to people with chronic illness by putting the blame back on them.”
I was one poster who brought up CBT because it has really been helpful for a friend of mine. I specifically said it was not because the illness was “all in her head,” and her experience has certainly not been that therapist is “putting the blame back on her.” She found a CBT therapist because she wanted a way of reframing her own thoughts about the unfairness and injustice of going from being a very active, energetic person who worked a 60-hr a week job and ran half-marathons to being a person who – through no fault of her own – now struggles to muster the energy to walk up the stairs in her house, and is on long-term disability. She got sick in the first wave, in spring 2020, so it’s going on three years she’s been trying to recover. She has seen multiple specialists in different parts of the country and has been told, you may get better from here or this may be as good as it gets. If this is “as good as it gets” for her, she wanted some help working through her feelings about that, and CBT has been very helpful for her in that regard. She is a person who does not want to immerse herself into an identity of “I am a sick person” or sit around feeling sorry for herself, and having those thoughts/feelings was almost more deleterious for her than her physical symptoms. She was also not a person who was going to look at the sanitarium model of “let me just take to my bed for the rest of my life and have people take care of me” and feel good about it.
She is not feeling a ton better physically, but the change in her mental outlook and mood has been amazing to witness, and I am so glad that she found a great therapist whose perspective was not “let’s see how we can blame this on you” but “if you are troubled by your thoughts, how can we change those thoughts or reframe your thinking so they are less bothersome for you.” I have done CBT for past trauma and it was helpful for me in the same way: the events that traumatized me still happened, and my therapist never tried to minimize those events or their impact on me. She just gave me some techniques so that I would not fixate on certain thoughts or allow certain recollections to drag my mood down into the gutter for a day, or week, or longer.
If you have not tried CBT with a good, trauma-informed, disease-informed therapist you might want to give it a shot. Especially if the “total rest” model has not gotten you the results you’re looking for.
This does sound like a good therapist and like a fine use of CBT. (I wonder if it was just CBT or if there were some Acceptance & Commitment and Insight Oriented approaches mixed in just based on this description?)
My experience with CBT was similar except it was inappropriately applied. The therapist seemed to think I was identifying as a sick person, sitting around feeling sorry for myself, and wanting to take to bed for the rest of my life and let other people take care of me. In fact I was trying desperately to keep my career afloat, stay out of bed, and regain my health! The only good thing I got out of therapy was when the therapist finally apologized for it all and urged me to find better specialists, which ultimately led to the treatments that got me back to work. But even if I’d never been correctly diagnosed or treated, I don’t think the misinterpretation of symptoms I had no control over as evidence that I was embracing illness somehow would have helped me build a life I could have felt good about.
Paging Long Covid
Trauma is very different from disease and there’s no such thing as total rest.
I speak from experience with CBT personally and looking at the scientific evidence.
I urge you with withhold unhelpful and uninformed advice.
I urge you not to use this platform to beat your own dead horses, which seems very anti-therapy. If it didn’t work for you, fine. It works for other people and you’re being hugely irresponsible and insensitive to keep insisting that it’s harmful.
Paging Long Covid
You are being very ignorant of the medical research at the attempted risk of someone else’s health.
I trust Long Covid Help poster will look at the evidence for herself.
OP, you may be right, but your sources aren’t as scientific as you suggest. Unless I miss my mark, the link you cite is one person’s unvetted opinion in response to a BMJ article, which presumably was peer reviewed.
Paging Long Covid
I cited that as that response in the BMJ has lots of sound sources sk it was easier than listing a whole bunch of peer reviewed papers myself.
Unfortunately the big GET/CBT study in the UK hid some of the data that made the intervention look bad; this was a huge scandal. It’s happening all over again with publications that say there’s nothing physiologically wrong with long COVID (and the peer reviewers don’t correct this or require authors to engage with any of the literature to the contrary). It’s not possible to understand the state of the research on ME/CFS without understanding that there are at least some bad faith actors in the mix.
Wow that skirt is sooo short. I didn’t think we were doing that anymore.
The very short skirt combined with a short jacket makes it look like she bought her suit in the children’s section.
Yeah, plus the loafers and the model’s hair style.
I actually kind of love the loafers.
It is short, or just short on someone who is 5-7 to 5-10?
I feel like a skirt that far below my fingertips on my own body would be below my knees. Maybe her legs are abnormally long? Maybe I am part gorilla?
I am part gorilla. My wingspan > my height.
You and my husband. We’re about the same height (he’s 1″ taller) but he gets to reach for all of the stuff on high shelves due to his monkey arms.
Is it Friday yet?
It says she’s 5’10”. It also says she’s wearing a size 10 though.
I assume it is a UK10, though that also seems generous on her.
That said, I love the length and am sick of knee length skirts. Sadly, I very rarely have a need for suits now that I am in-house.
Plus the loafers it definitely reminds me of something I wore as an intern in the ’90s. Doesn’t Rachel Green wear something like this on Friends? The ’90s are back!
I was a brand new public defender when Ally McBeal was on. Short skirts and clunky heeled loafers!
This would easily be knee length on me
Short skirt and very high neck blazer! Looks odd to me.
It looks cute, but I can’t imagine wearing this to a client meeting.
I think it looks awkward but maybe that’s because the mannequin it’s on is so stiffly posed.
That is a genuinely short skirt–not just proportionally. It’s 48 cm (~19 inches). That would be about 5 inches above my knee and not even remotely appropriate for work. Real Ally McBeal territory.
As a short person, I really like this suit and think it would make a great blank canvas for jewelry, scarves, and interesting shoes.
Paging booties question from earlier.
What I’m seeing people discuss as being “in” with booties is a a higher shaft at least above the ankle with either a square toe or a kitten heel.
If you’re okay with more of a boot than a bootie, which I prefer more lately with dresses and skirts, it’s more along the lines of this:
Life is short, wear what you want, but just a few ideas.
Yeah, life is short. Don’t shorten it more by buying those ridiculous kitten heeled boots. I literally cannot think of a more ridiculous looking thing to wear on your feet in winter. Maybe walking the streets of LA in 80’s weather…. At least I’d try to buy something that will last longer than a 3 month season.
I’m looking for an extra large upholstered desk chair. I want the seat to be really big so my cat can sit with me (he’s a big boy and doesn’t fit on my lap alone). Enclosed arm rests would also be ideal to contain the fluff monster. I’d also like it to be ergonomic (be able to tilt). Swivel would also be a plus, but I know my requirements list is getting long. Any ideas? I was looking at the Wells chair at Pottery Barn, but it doesn’t look like it’s ergonomic.
Note that if you get a really big chair, the back may be too far back to provide support for your…back. We got a “big and tall” office chair because it was on sale or something, and I can’t really use it without a lumbar pillow. The arm rests are also a little too wide to be comfortable for me.
As much as I love the idea of sharing your chair with your cat, this sounds like a great way to end up with terrible back pain. I think it’s going to be very hard to find a chair meets these requirements and still fits you properly. I’d get a bed or second chair for the cat to sit next to you instead.
Like a kitty co-sitter! This is an unmet need in the market.
lol! Maybe you could attach a little bassinet to the arm of the chair??
I was thinking an armless office chair and an office stool alongside, at the same height. Kitty has his own chair!
Herman Miller Aeron fits my 13lbs tabby behind me, but let’s just say he is well nested. You could try for one size up from what you would normally buy and see how it feels.
No recs, but this is adorable and makes me so happy.
Different search terms may be helpful. Perhaps try for “executive conference chair”
I can totally picture a tufted leather desk chair my dad had while we were growing up. He called it his “boss chair”
With the caveat that I’m doing my best to put it out of my mind and keep moving on with networking, searching, etc.: I’m curious what people’s recent experience has been re: how long it took to get a screening interview invitation after submitting a job application online. Mid to senior level in house lawyer if it matters.
In my most recent job hunt in 2021, I got a response to both jobs I applied for within 12 hrs— but I also had referrals from current employees. I don’t have any contacts for a position I just applied to, and I’m assuming that not hearing from an internal recruiter for 2.5 business days = a no.
I am currently hiring for a role with our internal recruiter and today she is starting to do pre screen calls for the people who applied starting the 3rd. Depending on the size and how many open roles those recruiters have it can take a bit to hear back and that doesn’t mean they aren’t interested. Often they go in batches to screen, decide who to prescreen, then prescreen. I’d be more worried by an immediate no, as it means its a system screening you out.
Same level also in house – 2 weeks from initial application to email to set up phone screen.
Source: recently applied for and got a mid to senior level in-house job.
I found it to be a mixed bag. Many times I would receive a request for a screener within 1-2 business days of applying, but for the job that I actually ended up getting an offer for, I did not receive a request for a month. (The company was going through a reorg, so funding for the position was tied up temporarily.) For every company though, I generally heard whether I had made it to the next round of interviews after the screener within a day or two.
Right now? People are juuuuuust turning to looking at resumes that came in during December.
Yeah, I don’t want to give you false hope, but in my 2022 job search, I usually heard back and received interview requests 2-3 weeks after application.
What is your OOTD?
Mine started out as a dress, is now dress + chicken tikka spill. Oil + tomato sauce — is there any hope? Or is this terminal :(
Dawn dish soap is your hope here.
+1 – the sooner you can get to it, the better!
Cool leather joggers from RTR. Cashmere crew neck in black and a j crew tweed moto jacket in black and white from posh mark with white sherpa trimmed sneakers. I have zoom hearings so I’m professional on the top but I’m going to wrangle my kids later.
OOTD two cashmere sweaters, skinny jeans (sue me) and waterproof boots. I’m in the Bay Area.
My two cashmere sweaters are a cardigan and a pullover. I’m WFH and we keep our house on the chilly side.
In other news, ever since I got a space heater for my home office, my two cats have become office cats. Funny how that works. It’s fine and cute other than when they decide to see if the voices on the Zoom will feed them since I’m clearly too stupid and uncaring to do so.
2017 high waisted crop trousers, Elie Tahari mock turtle, thin trouser socks and loafers.
My magic DVF navy trousers, silk scarf with the Rotary “theme” print from my year as president in 2019 (today is Rotary meeting and they are honoring past residents), long-sleeve crewneck merino sweater in one of the colors from the scarf, merino cardigan in another of the scarf colors. Block heel pointy toe pumps in a third scarf color.
I want to crawl under a rock. I was a speaker on a webinar yesterday for 300+ employees of a client, and I was underprepared and it showed. I was tripping over my notes, stumbling over my words. It was genuinely awful. People used the Q&A feature to say, “Doesn’t she mean X?” Yes, the audience knew more than I did. I hardly slept last night, I’m so mortified. Two other colleagues were also on the webinar as speakers and their sections were fine.
What, if anything, do I do? Falling all over myself apologizing to the client and my colleagues is my natural response, but I’m afraid that’ll make it worse. We’re giving the webinar to another client next week, so I can dramatically improve my performance in front of my colleagues, but damn, I looked like an idiot in front of this client and their employees.
Hugs you’re fine. I lost a major appellate case and looked (at least in my head) like the dumbest lawyer who ever lived at oral argument. I lived to tell the tale and seriously regret every moment I spent apologizing and beating myself up. You will too. I wouldn’t apologize unless it’s brought up. Take a break, have a few drinks with your people tonight, go look at the stars and feel small and start again tomorrow.
There is probably nothing you can do to rectify this with the client, and I wouldn’t call further attention to it by bringing it up with the client or anyone else. Hopefully it was not as bad as you think and you just need to move on from it. Although it’s eating you up inside, it will probably be quickly forgotten by others. Learn from your mistake. If you ever do anything again for the client, make sure you do an A++ job. And do the same for the upcoming webinar. Good luck!
If it makes you feel any better, I was a hot mess leading a meeting last week. There had been a system-wide IT outage and I almost didn’t make it (and wouldn’t have been able to tell anyone!). I was so flustered that as soon as someone asked a question I totally blanked.
Anyway – I wouldn’t pre-emptively apologize. Depending on your relationship with your boss, I might touch base with them and mention how you’re going to approach this next meeting. Hang in there!
So sorry that happened! I don’t really pay close attention when I am sitting in these types of things. Sure a few people may have noticed but I doubt it was glaringly obvious. I bet most people were only halfway paying attention. I would not say anything to anyone – just make sure you are super prepared for the next one. Good luck!
Just do better next time. It happens to the best of us.
This. If you were a man, you’d be strutting around acting like you rocked it. So do that.
I just left a job where I gave webinars and live presentations. Some of them didn’t go so well. Go to the next one, do a great job, and then, perhaps, comment that you know you weren’t at your best last week.
Use the experience as a motivator to clean up the presentation for the next round, but don’t beat yourself up too badly. Most people aren’t paying as much attention to you and what you perceive as blowing it as you are, and mostly they’re probably just glad they weren’t the ones presenting.
+1 don’t apologize preemptively. As for the people correcting you in the chat, some folks just like to be the smartest one in the room. Most people were probably multitasking on the webinar, paying partial attention while doing something else.
Plenty of people are unapologetically bad at their jobs, and they trundle along for years if not decades. Channel the spirit of those people for now.
Do not fall all over yourself to apologize! Give yourself whatever you need to get over it in private; then whatever you need to prepare to knock it out of the park next week.
also +1 to the first comment you received telling you to go look at the stars. Or the ocean, or people watch, or whatever gives you perspective.
This too shall pass. Allow yourself to wallow in it only insofar as it motivates you to do better in the future, and then put it firmly out of mind and move forward with confidence.
If they’re still letting you do the next webinar then it must not have been that bad.
For those who have applied for a Project Management Professional certificate through PMI, how much detail do they want on the timeline of projects you lead? I’m starting to put together the application information and have really just started with listing out the projects and what I think the timing was, but can’t tell how far into the recess of my mind I need to reach to get specific details.
I know a few people who have this certification who have never led projects in their lives, so I wouldn’t worry too much.
I also know people who got the certification before they’d done project management, because project management was their goal.
If you’re in the right line of work, I believe it can be a helpful credential in sort of a necessary but not sufficient way – you still need a way to get some experience in addition to the credential.
Anyway to OP – just list what you can remember. I think they really only want a highlight reel.
There are intro credentials to get at PMI then for those people. You don’t fake your way through a cert you aren’t qualified for.
IDK what to tell you, they got it! These places are fee based. I don’t think they’re as picky as they like to sound.
I am starting the same process and going by month (so like “Project A, July 2020-January 2021”).
Good luck with everything and I hope the process goes smoothly!
This is what I figured it was and what I was going to start with – hope it goes smoothly for you as well!
Anon Worried About PCV
To the poster from this morning who has some symptoms of PCV:
My dad has this. He was diagnosed in spring 2018. It took a long time to get to a diagnosis, but he’s now basically okay other than the peripheral neuropathy (which worsened for years before we figured out what was wrong and started getting him treated; originally they sent him for a nerve surgery thinking it was something totally different, and that probably worsened nerve issues too). I say this because if your neuropathy is mild and this is being caught soon, you should be better off.
Since diagnosis, he goes for IVIG treatments every three weeks that make him tired for a day. He also sees a specialist maybe 3x/year. No other treatment, to my knowledge. So far, no worsening, either; his neuropathy improved with IVIG initially and then plateaued at that improved level. And perhaps most importantly, no cancer. PCV puts you at a heightened risk for certain blood cancers, but it’s not a cancer guarantee.
By the way, we worried that the PCV and IVIG might put him at greater risk for serious covid, but they seem to have done the opposite, strengthening his immune system with the extra immunoglobulin; he’s never had covid even though my mom has had it twice — and they are both very mediocre about masking, etc. That said, he’s viewed as immunocompromised and gets larger or extra doses of covid and flu vaccines, etc.
If you want to talk with my dad (or with me), you can reach me at:
burner DOT anon DOT 112358 (at) the mail of g DOT com
Best of luck — I’m thinking of you!
Thank you so much! I am supposed to go get repeat bloodwork done tomorrow morning and they are expanding the panel to include a lot of hematology-related markers (and also including a test for a genetic marker) that should give them more information. I already researched some local hematologists in case I need to make an appointment. I appreciate you sharing all this information. I am glad your dad is doing well!
I would make the hematology appointment now, to get in as soon as possible. You can always cancel it!
Lawyers – do you bring your spouse/SO to weeknight evening events like bar association awards ceremonies? It’s been years since I’ve attended one of these but my memory is people do not do this. However for whatever baffling reason, mine usually wants to go. I have this weird feeling that it makes me look out of touch or …naive… or something if I bring him. He does bring me to his equivalent of these events but he’s in a totally different field (art) so it’s more common there. Thoughts?
Unless it’s a gala type event, or you are getting the award, I don’t think your spouse should attend.
Agreed. My partner does not attend these type of events with me unless it is a gala where partners typically attend. This is true for both pure bar events, as well as industry events that my niche practice serves.
I only see spouses at these types of events if the spouse is also a lawyer or if they are supporting the person receiving the award.
I have similar events in my industry and some people bring their spouses, but it’s unusual. I’m one of the few women in the group so I always end up with the wives, which is not a great networking opportunity for me. (Sorry wives)
Keep it professional and just go by yourself or with colleagues.
I’ve brought my spouse to a bar association gala/ fundraiser where there may be an award given out. But for an event that’s just handing out awards, it would be very unusual and out of touch to bring a spouse unless you were the one receiving the award.
No. It’s absolutely not done and it’s weird he’s insistent on it. “This is my work, and I expect you to respect me and my understanding of what is appropriate in my field.”
I’ve never brought a date.
If no one else has spouses there, that’s your answer. You may just need to explain to your husband that your industries are different. I assume in art as a field, one of the values is to get as many eyes on the art as possible so everyone dragging along a guest is expected. Whereas in the legal field, bar association events are known to exist for networking. Implied in that is: networking with people who can be professionally useful to the lawyers in attendance, generally other lawyers. It is discourteous to the other attendees to bring someone who does not align with the purpose of the event.
Spouse is a lawyer and has never invited me to any of these things. My sense is it’s lawyers only.
If you don’t want him to go I think you should just be able to say that and he should not go. My feeling is a spouse/SO should go to the other person’s professional event if and only if both parties want to have the spouse/SO go. (I realize there are some fields like national politics where the spouse/SO basically needs to make consistent appearances but it doesn’t sound like that’s the case here.)
No, unless you’re the honoree, it’s not a date thing.
Make sure he doesn’t just want to come to “keep an eye on you” at this social event with drinks, etc. Ask me how I know.
Yeah no. Especially if no one else is bring a spouse, it gives off a “dependent” vibe. I took my ex to a few and it was really distracting because I wanted to talk to other guests, and he wanted to talk to me. He was bored and felt out of place in our conversations, and I felt like I had to entertain him and make him not feel left out. It was awkward all around.
Vicky Austin – just saw your post on the morning thread. Thank you so much!! So nice of you. We are still without power, but many around us have serious damage to their homes and we do not, so we are grateful. Also, two of our wonderful neighbors loaned us a chainsaw and helped my husband clear the 80 foot douglas fir tree that fell across our driveway yesterday. We live in a wonderful small rural community! Trying to be positive, but man, that wind yesterday early AM was terrifying and I’ve heard we’re in for more storms. Hope my fellow Californians are also hanging in there! I think we all wanted the rain…but maybe not like this!
Hey Horse, which part of the state are you in? I’m in Berkeley. Lots and lots of downed trees and fallen branches around here, and we’re not done!
Santa Cruz. Stay safe, friend!
Glad you’re hanging in there!! Stay safe.
That wind yesterday early AM was so spooky. It woke me up in a panic. I’m watching more torrential rain from my home office window and nervously eyeing up the large redwoods around us. they’re most likely far enough from the house that we’d be fine, but I still moved my daughter’s crib into another room. So scary.