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Something on your mind? Chat about it here. I was sure we'd already featured the Sam Edelman Petty, but was surprised to see that we had instead featured the lookalike from Clarks, Spye Belle. The Petty is a very popular boot at a nice price, and comes in a million different color options — I like the low heel, and in the version pictured, the mix of black suede and almost reddish wood sole and platform. The boot is $130 at Zappos. Sam Edelman Petty Readers, which are your must-have boots for weekends and evenings these days? On the flip side, which are your must-have boots for work? Sales of note for 9.10.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off your purchase
- Banana Republic Factory – Up to 50% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Save up to 40% on new markdowns
- Boden – 15% off new styles
- Eloquii – $29 and up select styles; up to 50% off everything else
- J.Crew – Up to 50% off wear-to-work styles; extra 30% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – 40-60% off everything; extra 60% off clearance
- Lo & Sons – Warehouse sale, up to 70% off
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Spanx – Lots of workwear on sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – BOGO 50% everything, includes markdowns
- White House Black Market – 30% off new arrivals
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
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And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
anon
I have two pairs – Putty (the suede one that is so popular) and all black. Love them both.
S in Chicago
I tried both and thought the Petty style was a bit more comfortable than the Clarks version (which now appears to be phased out and replaced by a version with embellishment). Anyway, that was a bit of a surprise.
emeralds
I have the all black version and LOVE them. So comfortable and versatile.
Anon in NYC
I love the Petty. Just bought it in brown a few weeks ago – can easily walk 1+ miles in them without having to break them in.
EduStudent
I have the Petty in the putty color too and LOVE them. Tempted to buy black as well!
espresso bean
Do you tuck your jeans into them or cuff your jeans? I love all these ankle boots, but I feel like I need all new jeans to wear with them!
Shaman
You can go either way! I’ve seen both and both look great–however, the only style I’ve seen worn with these (sort of a ladies’ chelsea boot?) are skinny jeans.
Tibby
Okay, I’m sold. Buying them now in putty… how do they run, small/big/TTS? I’m between sizes (6.5 and 7).
Anonymous
They fit me weirder than any other shoe. I’m usually a 9.5, but in these I was a 9 wide.
EduStudent
TTS, and re: the question about jeans, I always cuff them ever so slightly, so there’s a bit of ankle showing.
Anonymous
Does anyone have extensions? My assistant just got some- I thought they were only for african americans? but she’s white and they look awesome!
cc
are you serious with this? please go back to wherever you came from.
Monday
Extensions are extremely common for models, actresses etc of all ethnicities. Most glossy photos we see show women with extensions or weaves.
Anonymous
Kristen Chenowith talks openly about using them throughout her adult life, not just on Broadway. They are a go-to for people with fine hair. Her memoir is a fun read.
anon
do I even want to know what it means for something to be “only for African Americans?”
Unicorn
This has to be a troll.
Trisha
Oh FFS! She is asking if other white women have extensions because white women never talk about it! It is culturally acceptable for women of color to change their hair all the time with wigs and extensions. No shame! It is all in fun. For a white woman to wear a wig – oh it is a secret!!! And, it is reasonable to want to know if the texture of the natural hair might impact how well the extensions hold. Why do people have to act so silly?
Anonymous
White women wear extensions all the time. like literally every famous person wears them. this was an idiotic stupid trolling comment and for people to answer her seriously and for you to be like oh she didn’t mean anything about it is insulting. How to ask a texture question “Has anyone with thin, fine hair worn extensions before?” How not to ask a texture question – see above.
Trisha
Like! OMG! Famous people are not the people who work in your office.
Erisa
Ariana Grande always wears extensions.
Anonymous
TJ: I am visiting Nice, France for 3 days. This is my first time there and I won’t have a car. Any recommendations of where to stay/do/eat/see? Thanks!
Anon
Nice is one of my favorite places ever. I studied abroad there so I don’t have specific recommendations on where to stay, but i would stay as close to the promenade and old Nice (Vieux Nice) as you can afford. Staying near the airport is cheaper but far enough that you’ll need to cab/bus everywhere. And the area around the train station is cheap but pretty sketchy.
If you’ll be there on the weekend make sure to go to Cours Saleya, whichever is a farmers/flower market in Vieux Nice. Hike up Castle Hill for the must-have postcard pictures. Get lost in Vieux Nice. If you want to talk in English, grab a drink at Wayne’s Bar. If you have money to bl-w, get dinner outdoors at Coco Beach and watch the sunset.
Also a great day trip spot to tons of adorable small towns– Genoa so you can say you went to Italy (cool flea market some days), Monaco, Eze, St tropez, ville franche. The busses are cheaper than trains but trains are more comfortable.
Anon
I stayed at the Palais de la Mediterranee (Hyatt property) this past Spring and it was amazing!
Anon
Heh, I lived literally next door to this hotel. Amazing location: right on the beach but close enough to Vieux nice to walk to and from.
(This is Anon from 2:21)
Tunnel
Bring all the money! Nice is expensive as f*ck.
ss
A trio of excellent and inexpensive bistros in vieux Nice : Acchiardo, Antoine, Palmyre (reservations required, these places are tiny and deservedly popular, the last one may be open for lunch only). A couple of enjoyable wine bars with food : Part des Anges, Mise au Verre (same owner, the second is open on Sunday when little else is). The food/ flower market on cours Saleya is open daily except for Monday when it is replaced by a flea market. If you enjoy modern art, the Matisse and Chagall museums are terrific bite-sized in-town visits.
No car is not a problem – Nice is very well-connected up and down the coast, and to the hinterland. If you’re only there for 3 days, I’d only bother with a single excursion – perhaps to St. Paul de Vence for the pretty village and the Maeght gallery, or Eze for the pretty village and its spectacular perched location above the Mediterranean. Travel time should be under an hour and for Eze, take the bus to the village and walk the coastal route down to the train station for your return trip.
Winter Coat
Has anyone ever bought a coat from Victoria’s Secret? I have a gift card so I’ve been looking at their winter collection. I like the peacoat style, but I wonder if the fit-and-flare style would be better/warmer. I have tried posting this comment about 5 times and it never lets me so I took the links out…I’ll try to comment with the links, but on the VS website under “Clothing – Jackets & Coats” they are listed as “The VS Peacoat” and “Wool Fit-and-Flare Coat.”
The peacoat is wool/polyester/cotton/rayon/acrylic while the fit-and-flare is only wool. I live in Charlotte, NC so the winters aren’t brutal but it can still get into the twenties and thirties early in the morning. I’m also only 5’1 so I wonder if the fit-and-flare would be too long for me. I’ve never owned a long coat before. Thoughts/experience on VS coats?
rachelellen
I have not but I have reservations about all VS quality. It’s cute but I wonder if you could find something similar elsewhere… maybe use the gift card for panties or something.
health care anon
I just bought several sweaters from there, and have gotten riding boots from them in the past – I quite like them. They are a bit lightweight (the sweaters), but in my office they work well and the quality is good for what I’m accustomed too.
anon
I used to buy sweaters, leggings, and shirts from them in the past. I liked the clothing at first, but they weren’t made of high-quality materials, so they looked a bit cheap after washing them a few times, unfortunately.
wintergreen126
I’m your height, and I bought a peacoat from VS about 2 years ago. So far, so good. It fits well, maybe a touch roomier than expected–but this worked out well when wearing a heavier sweater. With a good scarf, gloves, and a few layers, it’s kept me warm enough in Boston on days when it’s in 20s and not terribly windy. (Any colder than that, and I pull out the big jacket; I don’t care how silly I look.)
Friend Question
I have been friends with my best friend since high school. We’re both in our early 30s. Despite going to geographically distant colleges, now living on different coasts, her getting married, and ending up in very different careers, we’ve managed to stay close all this time.
Whenever she comes to visit, I always get the short end of the straw, meaning she spends most of her time and attention with her family. Her extended family is very demanding in general, so I always try not to stress her out by mentioning our lack of time together, but I’m getting annoyed.
Background: She and her family are super super close. Her parents (who live across the country from her) are still very involved in her and her grown sibling’s lives. Her parents are immigrants from East Asia, which I mention because there are some cultural factors in play (basically, whatever her parents say, goes). Her mom works odd days and hours. My family is not particularly close, although we live near each other.
For example, my friend and her husband are visiting for 10 days or so, over two weekends. She’s staying at her parent’s house the whole time, but taking short day trips to visit friends and family. I’m working in biglaw, so my schedule is all over the place.
She wanted to visit on a Friday and Saturday because her mom is off of work on Sunday. Ok, fine. We had a closing scheduled on Friday, I told her it could be over quickly, or it might drag into the night, so Friday might not work (the deal just fell through, of course, so I’m twiddling my thumbs at the office). Saturday, she’s getting here in the afternoon. I just found out she’s leaving after a few hours to go have dinner with her mom and dad (they are two hours away from my house), because that’s the only night both her mom and dad have off at the same time and they want to go to dinner with her. She has had time with them both seperately this week.
She’ll see her parents again around Thanksgiving and then again at Christmas/New Years. She usually does not have time for me on these visits, although the airport she flies into is in my city. When I visit her, I spend the whole time with her.
Basically, I’m whining. I don’t know how to bring this up without sounding petty, but I’d like some time too. I thought I was being a good friend by not putting more pressure on her, but I’m fuming today. She’s only here for a few hours and her husband is here, so maybe I should bring it up over the phone at a later time? I hate to ruin the short time we have together, but I’m tired of this.
NYtoCO
It seems that you realize, to a certain extent, that you may be overreacting about this. However, I can relate to you. My best friend lives in a city 5 hours away from where I currently live. She’s the only person I know in her city, so when I go to visit her I spend the whole time with her. However, she has a cousin plus a few other friends in my city, so she has a few people to visit when she comes here.
Yes, sometimes I almost let it get to me– I don’t see her that often and want to spend more than one day with her! But, I have to remind myself exactly what our friendship is about– it’s not about obligations and requirements, it’s about loving each other and enjoying the time we do get to spend together.
I do think you should bring it up with her at a different time, but please don’t approach it as though she’s done something wrong. Just express that you wish you could have seen her for more than a few hours, and you want to make sure that you get some great quality time next time she visits. And try not to make time with her a competition between you and her parents– everyone has a different relationship with their family and it’s hard to compare that relationship to a friendship, no matter how close you are.
In the meantime, can you propose that you meet up again, in addition to tomorrow night, before she leaves? Since both of your schedules have changed, I think this is reasonable.
lawsuited
A very good reminder: “it’s not about obligations and requirements, it’s about loving each other and enjoying the time we do get to spend together.”
Thanks for this.
Friend Question
Wow, thank you! Your second paragraph really hit home.
It’s hard to understand because my family operates in such a different fashion, but you’re right- I can’t see this as a competition, and she’s doing her best to make everyone happy. I’m not being very eloquent, but this was so helpful to hear.
Sarabeth
I don’t mean to be dismissive, but it seems a little unreasonable to expect your friend to prioritize you over her family. Spending dinner with both parents together seems like a really important, basic thing to do when visiting your family so I think it makes sense that that’s what she would choose to do. When I’m visiting my hometown, I prioritize my family over friends almost to the point of not seeing those friends at all (admittedly, they’re not as close as you two are).
Friend Question
No, I don’t think you’re being dismissive. Thank you for being honest. I can’t help feeling the way I do, but I can recognize that I am being irrational about the whole thing. I posted beacuse I wanted exactly this type of gut check on how to handle this.
JJ
I understand your frustration, but I would also encourage you to approach this from your friend’s point of view. It’s probably really stressful to try and make everyone happy (especially with a demanding family/extended family) and she’s probably doing her best.
CountC
+1,000,000
Sarabeth
And that totally makes sense. I’m sympathetic to where you’re coming from–I’m just also sympathetic on the other side. It’s hard when you family is far and you want to maximize your time with them.
Spirograph
This was my thought, too. If her parents didn’t live within a couple hours of you, would she make a separate trip just to see you? It sounds to me like she’s visiting her parents, and trying to fit you in because you’re important to her, not like she’s visiting you and then bailing to go hang out with her parents.
That said, this definitely seems like something you could bring up on the phone later. Maybe suggest that at some point she could come visit and stay with *you* for a girls’ weekend? – ie, not tell her parents she’s coming, and not bring her husband, and you schedule some time off of work so you’re both able to focus on your time together.
Friend Question
True, this is the case. She has limited time off at work and her husband’s family is similarly close knit (reunions, BBQs, holiday trips, the whole bit), so she’s run pretty ragged with family obligations.
I really like your suggestion! Maybe I’ll surprise her with tickets for Christmas for a random weekend vacation.
Parfait
Schedule it for somewhere OTHER than where you and her parents live. Y’all need to both get out of town and meet each other somewhere fun for a weekend.
Leigh
I have a friend like this. We’ve been close since we were toddlers, and a few years ago I pulled really, really far back because I was sick of being so far below her family in importance. Her family is manipulative and selfish (I love them like my own family, but they are what they are.) and any time she would be in the area her time was spent with only them. Even if we planned to get together for breakfast, they would horn in, despite knowing they had her undivided attention for days on end.
After pulling back, and realizing I didn’t want to lose this friendship but was completely sick of the way it was going, I flat out told her that I was sick of being given the short end of the stick and something had to give. So we compromised: If she was coming to the area for a family thing, we didn’t expect to see each other, but if she was coming to the area to see me, she doesn’t even tell them she’s in the area. It’s gotten more complicated than that, and of course we’re both flexible, but even just talking it out has helped immensely.
I know exactly where I stand with this friend though, so I was completely confident that we could work it out. She knows I’m not trying to keep her from her family, and knows that she is a push over when it comes to them. That was quite a bit of explanation to say: talk to her, if you’re as close as you say you are, you’ll be able to work it out.
ETA – The family in my area is extended family. She lived in the same area as her parents at the time.
Friend Question
Thank you for your perspective, and I’m glad to hear it worked out well for your friendship. I think we are close enough to talk frankly about it when we have a little time to ourselves.
L2fly
Just curious, how often do get out to visit her, wherever she lives? I know some of my oldest & dearest friends back in my hometown could very likely feel similar to how you do, because when I visit I am always trying to fit everybody in and sometimes the best I can do is arrange a quick dinner with my friends. But from my perspective it would be awesome if they could come visit me once in a while, too, instead of being the one always traveling and trying to make everyone happy in my old hometown.
Blonde Lawyer
The flip side to this is I visit my friend out of town fairly regularly. When she comes to town, she wants to visit other friends and family because she just saw me and hasn’t seen them. While I understand, I wish she would make the effort to come visit me too sometimes.
Friend Question
I visit her once a year for five days or so in the summer, and we spend the whole time together. Sometimes I’m left to my own devices for a day or two if she can’t take off of work. It makes me sad when she visits because she seems so close (2 hr drive vs. 6 hour flight).
It’s helpful to see that others here have struggles balancing distant friends and family, and I really appreciate the other side of the coin. If only we all had more vacation time!
Trisha
If you are so close, why wouldn’t you just hang out with her at her house with her family?
AN
It almost sounds as though you are jealous of her closeness with her family. If situations were reversed, how would you react? Wouldn’t you also spend as much time as you could with family? Chewing her head off will probably mean the end of any time you do get with her, so think about that possibility and act accordingly.
Raise Negotiations Advice
I’m hoping to get some advice from the hive about what I should expect or request for a merit raise as an associate going into my second year. I’m up for my first annual review next month, and I know salary is going to be a topic of discussion. I work for a small firm (so, not biglaw pay scale or lockstep), in a large southern California city, and I don’t know what any of the other associates are earning. I know it’s only been a few years since the economy took a dive and no one was getting raises, but things are turning around and our firm has been doing well, so I think I don’t think it’s too presumptuous of me to expect to be offered a merit raise, somewhere above a COL adjustment. I’ve been generally happy with my work and the firm environment, and I plan to stay here, at least for the next few years. I’ve received consistently positive feedback from the partners I’ve worked with, and I’m prepared to discuss my specific accomplishments during the review. But, what do you all think would be a reasonable percentage to request for a raise? Thanks in advance!
Ellen
Yay! Weekend Open Thread’s! I love Weekend Open Thread’s and these Zappos Shoe’s! They are VERY cute and would go well with jeans! I think I will get a pair even tho I would NOT wear these to work, so I have to pay 100%! FOOEY! But it is worth it to look good, especialy if I am trying to get a GUY to MARRY me!
As for the OP, yes, you deserve a raise over and above the Cost of Liveing. You say you want to stay there a few year’s, but you never know if you meet a guy, you could be MARRIED b/f you know it. So I would recomend you tell them you just want a 6% raise, especialy if you do not have a clotheing allowance.
I worked for a few year’s as a process server and never got any real money for it, tho the boss alway’s said I was his best girl. I could NOT take that to the bank. So don’t let the manageing partner soft-sell you with that kind of line, b/c he is takeing home alot of money and HE is not waiting for next year. You have to stand up for yourself, and you know that you are doieng good work and they would have to find some schlub if you left and he would NOT be as good as you.
So keep workeing hard, like I do, and you will become sucessful. Do NOT let them tell you to wait forever for the money to come in b/c you could find a boyfreind and leave soon anyway to have kid’s! I say go for it, the way I do.
This weekend, David is comeing over on Saturday and we will go to a movie. I do NOT want his hand’s on me in the movie theater, either. Myrna says she can come along and watch whose tuchusses he stare’s at. I think that could be a GREAT idea! YAY!!!!
Helene
Ellen, you are too conservative. I would advise her and all young associates as follows, particularly since it is not likely that she is getting extra money for clothing.
For every associate, I would take your present salary; multiply it by 1.10 for every year you have been working, here 1 year so the multiplier is just 1.10, and ask for that amount. By multiplying 1.10 for each year, you get the benefit of compounding. So if you are making 80,000, and are a second year, you will ask for $80,000 x 1.10, or $88,000. I think if you are lucky enough to be getting a clothing allowance, I would only factor that in if the value (in after tax $) was more than $1000 / year. Otherwise, its a wash.
Anon
Ellen, Bikram yoga! That will get you a man! Study and perfect that and your man problems will be in the rear view mirror as your man will only have eyes for your tuchis.
Need to Improve
I would ask for an equivalent percentage raise to what is given in BigLaw. That does not mean you are asking for a BigLaw salary, but that you are asking to increase at a similar rate, which is fair. The BigLaw lockstep increases are about 8-10 percent per year, depending on your year. I think I would start by asking for 10 percent.
Whether you get a bonus also informs this–i.e., with no bonus I also would ask for more money.
It never hurts to ask!
Pity, Party of 1
Can I whine for a second? My FI and I had a trip scheduled this weekend to our wedding destination (we were going to do our engagement photos and knock out some wedding planning, plus do some fun vacay stuff too). Now, due to a massive work fire drill for him this morning, our weekend trip is in serious jeopardy (I already know we’re missing our flight tonight, but I’m waiting to hear if we can fly out tomorrow and salvage part of our trip, or if we have to stay home completely). We also have a 10-day European vacation planned in three weeks, and that’s looking very questionable at this point, too.
I’m being supportive and calm to his face and telling him it’s no big deal, we can cancel/reschedule everything, but in reality, I want to put my head down on my desk and cry. It’s been over a year since our last vacation, and I was really looking forward to some extended time off. If these trips don’t happen, I don’t know when we’ll get the chance to go away again. I’d also put a lot of work into planning them (dinner reservations, museum tours, wedding meetings, etc.), so it just sucks to know it might all go down the drain.
I know that lots of people have much bigger problems and that mine pale in comparison, but I’m just bummed. It’s hard to look forward to something for so long and have it cancelled at the last minute.
emeralds
That is absolutely disappointing and I would be equally upset in your position. It’s great that you’re being so supportive with your fiance, but I think that you need to own your disappoint to his face instead of acting like you’re 100% okay with it, when you are very much not.
YMMV, but you can also go on your own. I know that might not work for you, and that traveling solo isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but if I were you, I would not want my first vacation in over a year to be held ransom by someone else’s work schedule. But it sounds like you’ve already done the work to plan two great trips, so why let that all go down the drain?
Anon
Definitely important to own your disappointment, but just don’t forget that he’s equally disappointed, if not more cause he’s the one causing this (indirectly). Let him get through the fire drill, and then talk to him about how you feel.
Pity, Party of 1
Thanks for the advice – I feel a little bit better knowing someone else would be disappointed too!
I know that I could travel alone, but it’s not really my cup of tea. We both have ridiculous work schedules (him moreso than me), so part of the joy of a vacation for us is spending some uninterrupted time together. I also don’t get that many vacation days, so I’d like to spend the time I do have on a trip with him, rather than go alone for the sake of taking time off.
POSITA
Grab a friend or family member and go this weekend without him, if you can. Reticketing under a new name isn’t that expensive.
I work Biglaw and this stuff often happens to me, with my husband on the receiving end. You just to live your life.
Been There
Another perspective: This sucks for your partner too, he probably knows you’re disappointed already, and it will probably mean a lot to him if you are able to be as supportive as you can and not pile on even more guilt when (okay, “if”) you learn that yes, your entire weekend trip is toast. I’m sorry you have to deal with this – but as a somewhat-seasoned litigator, I’ve been on the other side of this issue way too many times, and it’s so much easier to handle the inevitable guilt and frustration about last-minute changes and letting my family down when (almost always) my husband just adjusts, makes the best of it, and moves on. If this is happening so much that you need to have some serious discussions about whether the careers/lifestyle you have right now are really what you want for your future (which is totally legit), do raise those issues – but please, back up your partner now, and address the frustrations at a more neutral time, when there are no active fire drills. Good luck!
Pity, Party of 1
Thank you for providing some perspective from the other side. My FI is so stressed and focused on work right now that he hasn’t shown much disappointment/sympathy for the situation, which is understandable but frustrating. This was a nice reminder that when he gets out of the office (eventually), he’ll probably be as disappointed as I am, and I don’t need to make it worse by guilting him.
SC
I’ve been the one who’s had to cancel vacations numerous times because of work. The first time, it was a situation similar to the one you described — first vacation in over a year, 10 days off, lots of planning. Now that I understand that it’s part of my career/lifestyle, I book flights on airlines with no change fee or very reasonable change fees (basically Southwest and Jet Blue). I don’t plan vacations more than a few months out, and I put less effort into planning and try to be a little more spontaneous when we get there — basically book transportation, hotel, maybe tickets to a can’t-miss show or something. I don’t plan long vacations to places where I will be out of touch (cruises, camping, etc) so that I can work from the hotel if necessary. I also take vacation days by extending work trips so they’re less likely to get canceled.
So this advice is not going to help you much now. But if you and your SO decide that overall you have the careers/lifestyle you want, but vacation-canceling work fire drills are part of it, a new attitude and approach to taking them might help you avoid canceling or roll with the punches a bit better.
Blonde Lawyer
I think it is an industry problem. Most things aren’t so important that they can’t wait ten days. My state is very liberal in granting continuances. Lawyers never try to sabotage opposing counsel’s vacation here. I know transactional things can be more date sensitive but generally it just boggles my mind that this happens so often to people. Here, if motions were filed right before you left, you would ask for additional time to respond and OC would assent and you would file it w/ the court and it would be granted and you would deal with it on your return.
That said, I have had two “fire drills” push my departure day out by one. I have only had three emergency ex-parte motions that needed to be argued in my career and BOTH were on days I was headed out of town.
Firms need to have contingency plans in case someone winds up in the hospital. If you have a contingency plan for the hospital then you have a contingency plan for vacations.
I’m probably not making you feel better, just saying I feel your frustration. Your FI probably isn’t high enough on the totem pole to make these kinds of changes. I work w/ lead counsel in other states that clearly have different work atmospheres than mine. They want to schedule a meeting at 9 am the day of my return and expect me to be up to speed on the documents and ready w/ advice which would mean I was working on vacation. To that, I respond “we can meet at 9 am Tuesday when I will have had time to catch up on Monday.” They usually sound annoyed but agree.
Pity, Party of 1
He’s actually not in law, and this will probably always be an issue for him, given his chosen field (it would be nice to know that one day he’d be senior enough not to worry about these things!).
I know I should adapt, because the problem won’t go away any time soon, but right now, it stings a bit.
TRex
I can totally commiserate. My SO and I had a 10 day trip to Europe planned and he had to cancel 3 weeks prior to our departure. I reacted with quite a bit of frustration and will say, in retrospect, that it was unfair to him because he was stressed out by both his workload and also how the cancellation would affect me. Mind you, I think it’s important to be able to be open. However, both of us have had to cancel trips because of our work (we’re both litigators) and it can be extremely frustrating on both ends. Good luck and hope it goes well!
Sarabeth
Reposting my Australia question from this morning for a larger audience–thanks for humoring me:
My fiance and I are going to Australia and New Zealand in November for our honeymoon! We’re flying into Sydney (6 days), then heading to Cairns/Great Barrier Reef (2-3 days–though other Great Barrier Reef destinations welcome!), and then spending three days in Auckland.
Any suggestions for sites, itineraries, hotels, or just general tips would be VERY welcome as we’re way behind in booking things!
SF in House
We stayed on Green Island (Great Barrier Reef). It is one of my favorite places I have ever stayed. We spent most of our NZ time on the south island (glaciers, fjords, Queenstown) and loved it. If you like hot springs, Rotorua is great. Sydney is really expensive, be prepared, but accept and enjoy!
ABC
I highly recommend Green Island as well. It is gorgeous!
young in NYC
You will love Australia! I wouldn’t know where to begin with advice but here are some quick tips:
In Sydney or any city, I recommend going to some of the markets. Every one is unique and may have a different focus – ie food, boutique clothes, souvenirs, art, etc. You will find some very cool and unique items.
There is a beautiful walk along the beach in Sydney where you can walk past Bondi, Coogee, and other great beaches. The views are fantastic and it’s fun for a leisurely day.
Try to explore some more neighborhoods in Sydney aside from the immediately touristy areas. I really enjoyed paddington during the day and kings cross for some fun night life.
Try to also indulge in some “splurge” activities that you will only have a chance to experience while you are there. Consider walking across (on top of) the Sydney Harbour Bridge, scuba diving with an instructor if you’re not certified, and different types of sailing tours once you’re at the reef. Those are some of my best memories of when I briefly lived in Australia!
Snoozy
The beach walk is from Bondi to Bronte – highly recommended. Also take a ferry to Manly and walk over to Shelly Beach – very nice. My favourite swimming beach is Balmoral – also good for geat food (but not waves). For a hotel with a harbour view, I’d recommend the Park Hyatt. Magic (rooftop pool, plus an awesome high tea too.) The Rocks Market is twee but very nice.
Sydney is a very foodie city, so you can eat supremely well. Surry Hills (or even the casino, which is on the water) are good higher end places with lots of options. You can also do food tours of outlying suburbs if that’s more your thing.
I’d definitely do the Bridge Climb – book for sunset if you can. Walking along the bridge is free and also gives you some great views. Insider tip – get the local ferry back/to Milsons Point when doing this, as it’s a gorgeous 10 minutes. Oh, and Luna Park is fun there if you like old-fashioned arcades and rides, while North Sydney Pool has a swanky restaurant on the water and is one of the most scenic pools on the planet, I think. (Lucky me – we did school sport there!!)
With six days in Sydney, you might want to do a day trip/overnight to the Blue Mountains, particularly if you like hiking. Easy to do on the train, and Leura or Wentworth Falls are full of gorgeous places to stay. If you like wine, the Hunter Valley is also day tripable.
Sydney is expensive, but lots of things don’t have to be – for example, gawk at the QVB, buy some chocolates from Haighs, buy stuff for a picnic from the David Jones foodhall, then walk down past Hyde Park and then through the Botanical Gardens, heading as far as Mrs Macquaries chair. Picnic en-route, then back out using the exit near the Opera House, then have a drink at the Opera Bar. A perfect afternoon, really.
(Now I’m homesick!)
NZ Muse
Sydney! 6 days is quite a long time. I was there for a couple of days, managed to fit in Bondi, Cockatoo Island and the general touristy sites. I love food and here are the various places I ate at – http://nzmuse.com/2012/07/sydney-here-there-and-everywhere-in-the-city/ But generally my MO is just to walk around and soak up the sights.
In Auckland, I would definitely pop over to Waiheke Island. I love the west coast beaches. A little further afield, Matakana and surrounding areas make for a lovely day trip (the markets on the weekend are great) and Tawharanui is a beautiful untouched coastal paradise. Where are you staying? In town, the waterfront, Wynyard Quarter and Britomart are obviously a must see. Go up Mt Eden and One Tree Hill. More ideas here: http://nzmuse.com/2014/01/things-visiting-auckland/ And here’s a handy 3 day itinerary for inspiration – http://www.newzealand.com/int/trips-and-driving-itineraries/north-island/auckland-to-waiheke/
Happy honeymooning!
Cimorene
Our honeymoon was in Australia too! In Sydney, I remember having delicious sushi somewhere in Kings Cross. The opera tour was really interesting and I wish we had been able to see a show there as well. The Australian history museum was a great afternoon.
Cairns isn’t really a very great city, frankly. We did some dives from a day boat (it was supposed to be a multi-night cruise….long story) and then headed up to Port Douglas and the rainforest, which was beautiful.
We went to Melbourne and Tasmania, so no Auckland tips. Have a wonderful time, congratulations, and enjoy!
Sarabeth
Thanks, all! Very helpful info!
Susie
Since it’s officially fall now, any current trends you’ve been spotting?
On a similar vein, and fall fashion staples you got or are hoping to pick up?
I need a little help making some simple updates to my wardrobe!
Cb
I’m struggling with the stores at the moment, everything seems a bit dated (I guess this means I’m a grown-up remembering when trends first happened).
I am loving loafers though and really want a brown pair.
lawsuited
I’m on the hunt for a leather/knit jacket, a wool cape, and ankle boots. I’m having trouble finding a leather/knit jacket that I love, trouble finding wool capes at all, and trouble choosing my favourite ankle boots because there are so, so many options out there. I can’t believe how angsty my fall wardrobe shopping has become!
ss
Uniqlo’s line with Ines Fressange seems to have terrific staples. I can’t speak for the tailored garments but love the casual trousers, the cashmere in updated non-boxy fits, the boatneck merino knits in the styles and colours I normally buy at much higher prices at Petit Bateau, Armor Lux and the like.
Baby Savings or Loans?
I just found out that I’m pregnant (very excited!), and was wondering what you all would do in this situation. My husband and I have been try to aggressively pay down my student loans in David Bach style, meaning we’ve focused all of our extra cash on one particular student loan. We can continue to do that for the next several months or we can put the extra cash in a savings account for when the baby arrives, knowing that when the baby arrives that we won’t have an equal amount of spare cash to ramp back up the payments. The total amount of extra cash will not pay off the loan, but will reduce the remaining balance by roughly 50%.
I hate having all of this student loan debt, but I’m worried that we’re going to need a lot more cash on hand in the immediate months after baby. Thoughts?
POSITA
Can you pay off any loans by focusing on them? Think of it as the opposite of a snowball. This would free up cash flow after the baby (less in minimum payments due each month) while still paying off debt.
mascot
Have you figured out what the big expenses look like with baby? Lost salary for maternity leave? Childcare expenses? Actual child expenses (diapers, formula, health insurance increases and co-pays?) I think would help to run those numbers.
Spirograph
Yes. My husband and I both took significant time off when our first baby was born, and neither of us had paid parental leave. Definitely look into these costs. Good for you to focus on reducing your debt, but babies are not free. Your expenses will go up, and depending on your situation, you may need a certain amount of cash on hand to cover them. I would try to nail down what that $$ amount is (add 10% to your estimate) and set it aside in savings, then funnel the rest into your loan payments.
Congratulations!
Anonymous
I’m thinking the same also. Put aside what you’ll need for baby and leave, then plug the rest at loans. Once babe is in daycare, you’ll have significantly less free cash to put towards the loan, so do what you can now after you’ve assured that you have the cash on hand baby-related expenses.
NYtoCO
Congrats! There’s not many things I would recommend saving for over paying off debt, but I think this is one of them. I have no idea how much having/taking care of a baby costs in the first year or so, but you wouldn’t want to go into even more debt (hospital/medical/other) because you didn’t have enough of a safety net. It really depends on how much emergency and other savings you already have (I assume you’ve used much of it for the loan though).
Anon
I think I would do a hybrid approach and figure out how much money you think you will need and then see if you can still save a portion and pay down some of the debt. I really, really hate having debt, so to me it would be worth it to continue trying to pay down as much as possible over the next few months, and then slowly gather baby items used or on sale and be really selective about what we actually need. Of course, some expenses are mandatory and can’t be avoided or mitigated, but some stuff can.
Lyssa
My thinking on this would be to save, but save to make a big payment on the loan. By which I mean, put the money that you would be paying aside somewhere (in savings or whatever), and let it accumulate until you’re over this (good) hump. Then, once you’re feeling more secure that you have covered the baby-related expenses, pay all of that savings on the loan in a big lump sum. So, it’s there just in case you need it, but you’re not losing out on paying the loan by letting it just get absorbed into the general fund – you’re only spending it if you have to. Yes, you’ll spend a little more on interest than you would have over the next year-ish, but in the grand scheme of things, probably not that much more (think of it as buying a little more security).
Also, congratulations!
Anonymous
+1
Blonde Lawyer
+1
Burgher
Congrats! It took us almost a year after having our first child for our financial picture to fully stabilize where we felt comfortable with the adjusted expenses and savings and everything to get back into autopilot mode. However, we are not budgeting down to the penny types, either, so YMMV! I’d think having the savings on hand would be worth the peace of mind. You can always put it toward the debt later, but you can’t un-pay the debt.
Anon
I’ve so often seen the good advice given here that you don’t know what kind of baby you are going to get. I think it is really important to keep that in mind. So if it were me, I would hoard the cash for now, make minimum or slightly above minimum payments on debt, and then see what expenses arise when the baby arrives. It may be that you can continue to be very frugal and throw all of that money at the debt at some point. But given a lot of unknowns as first-time parents to a human you’ve never met, I would start prioritizing cushioning and security.
Need to Improve
Depends on what you think you need the baby money for. Babies don’t cost all that much money at first IF you have paid time off from work. There are diapers, breastfeeding is free if you’ll do that, you can try to get hand me down clothes or shop at thrift stores . . . there really is not that much stuff you should be spending money on (despite what the industry tells you). If you have to take parental leave unpaid, that’s another story. That will cost you money. Are you saving for childcare? For what exactly? You need a budget.
I would recommend putting some of it in a 529 plan for college. That’s going to get you a better return on your dollar long-term than paying off a low interest federal loan.
Anonymous
“a low interest federal loan.”
Statements like this drive me absolutely bonkers. You do realize many people have GradPlus loans at 8.5%, right? I’d hardly call that low when a 529 would be lucky to get 5%.
Need to Improve
That’s why I qualified it by saying low interest. Not all loans are the same. Many people have government loans that are at a less than 5% interest rate.
Also, you don’t seem to know a lot about a 529. 5% would be a very poor return over the long term. And there are the tax savings a 529 plan offers. Even the higher interest loans you are referring to may be worth foregoing to some degree to put money in a 529 plan that will not be taxed on capital gains.
Anonymous
Lol no. But you’re not worth it. Keep on improving.
Jan
Actually, according to the Dept. of Ed, the average federal student loan rate is 6.8%. Obviously yes, some loans are under 5%, but I do kind of get annoyed when people just 2 or 3 years older have no idea what student loan payments are like for 2010-2012ish grads–they think tuition was about the same for them, so payments can’t have gone up that much. They don’t realize that rates are not 2.5% anymore–they genuinely have no idea that student loans are not this super low-interest debt anymore. Hmm, now that I write this, it’s more of an issue with junior partners who seem to think all associates should be “buying in” to the community with a house and don’t get that it’s just not the best idea to sock away money for a down payment in a 0.75% online savings account when we had 8% loans outstanding.
Also, you may want to check out Morningstar on 529 returns and the heavy expenses dragging down returns. I do plan to start 529s for my children (if/when I have them), but they are not magic investment vehicles. And one of the oft-cited benefits is the ability to deduct contributions from income for tax purposes, but this is only a state tax benefit, varies by state (some cap the deduction pretty low), generally requires you to invest in the fund of your state when that fund may not have the best investment options, and obviously is of no benefit to someone living in a state with no state income tax. The exclusion from CG tax certainly offers a benefit vs. a non-tax-advantaged account, but if the money is going to pay down a loan instead (vs. going into a taxable brokerage account), the exclusion is not saving any taxes.
Tibby
You can refinance… I did that and now all of my 8.5% loans are either 2 or 3%.
Anonymous
Can you tell me how you did this? My understanding was that the interest rate on a federal consolidation loan would be calculated by weighting the interest rates of the loans themselves.
Anonymous
[Jumping in, I’m not Tibby]
About 10 years ago, you could refinance with the government and get rates around 2% (I think mine from that period is 2.36%–of course that was when I was in undergrad on a full ride and only had about $1000 of loans for room and board. Wish that rate had been available 5 years later when I racked up $100k for law school!)
Today, you are correct with respect to federal consolidations using a weighted average. The only way to get the 2-3% rate on a refi is to do a private refi. I believe SoFi and Common Bond are offering around 2.66% as their lowest rate if you do a 5 year variable term. Keep in mind that even if you have an 800+ credit score, you may not qualify for the 2.66% advertised rate if you’ve been working for less than 5 years and aren’t willing or able to have an (at least) upper-middle-class co-signor. I think +1% from the advertised lowest rate is more common from what I’ve heard. By going private, you also give up all of the federal repayment options, including graduated and extended payment plans, IBR, forbearance, and deferment. I knew I wasn’t going back to school and that I was staying at a firm long enough to knock out my loans in the next 2-3 years so I refi’d, but not everyone can feel comfortable giving up those safeguards.
Blonde Lawyer
I went through Sofi. Lowered my interest rate enough that I will shave at least a year off payments. I got a better rate bc I went with a 5 year refi. They have programs to help with job loss and can do forbearance. They don’t do IBR as far as I know. If you are interested in applying I have a link where I get $100 for your application and if you join, you get $100. We can connect offline if that requires my personal info. I have to check.
Anonymous
You can also “refer yourself” to SoFi. The referring person doesn’t have to be a current borrower (I think a lot of their referrers are finance bloggers), so just sign up for the referral program with one of your e-mail addresses, and send a referral link to yourself at the e-mail address you plan to apply under. I did this and got $200, $100 from each side of the referral.
Tibby
Apologies for the late reply, but the other commenters are right — I used SoFi. I’m not sure you can refinance through the government anymore; you have to do a private loan. You do give up benefits/protections, but to me it was worth it for the interest rate savings. You can use my referral link, if you want, and we’ll both get $100: http://friends.sofi.com/3bVfC
Medic Maggie
I NEEEEEEDDDDD these boots so bad. Or some like them. They’re on my list. But for weekends, I usually wear my Keen Kacie lace brown/leather; or my tall boots (Guess Lurie)
Sundae Funday
Medic Maggie just took a read through your blog and I love it! Great job keep it up :).
Medic Maggie
Holy wow! Thanks!
Erin @ Her Heartland Soul
You ladies were so helpful with fashion blogger recommendations. I’m now wondering if you have any recommendations for good travel bloggers to read? Bloggers who are constantly sharing about all their recent excursions and jet setting around the globe. I’m not taking a vacation for a while and want to live vicariously through them! haha
Thanks so much!
Becky
Ooh, I like this one. (http://loveonelcamino.com/)
I think they’re back home now, and it’s only one trip, but essentially they wrote journals about their trip through France and Spain separately and only shared them with each other at the end.
NZ Muse
I mostly read long term nomad blogs. Adventurous Kate. Never Ending Footsteps. Young Adventuress. Legal Nomads. Traveling 9 to 5 :)
2Banon
I like these boots a lot – except for suede + rain does not equal anything good and it rains a lot here.
EduStudent
They make some leather versions too – black and brown for sure, maybe a few others.
Sneaky Sneaky!!
Has anyone ever run an entire business/made additional cash WHILE working their day job? Someone at my current place of employment just got canned for running a side endeavor during normal work hours. He used the company internet AND supplies. And the strangest part – I don’t think anyone would’ve known if he hadn’t run this mouth to the wrong person! My feelings about this are varied. It’s brilliant and highly unethical and brilliant again! Just curious if anyone knows someone who has tried this racket… :/
Anonymous
I’m pretty sure my company explicitly forbids this, so..no.
Anastasia
I remember reading in my contract that anything you work on during time you’re paid by employer is the property of the employer. So if you write the Great American Novel at work, or start a side business or whatever, technically employer can not only fire you, but demand all of the profits that ever come out of it.
I’m always kind of impressed when I hear stories like this… like the computer programmer who outsourced his job to someone in China for half the price, and then spent his days at work watching cat videos (although I would get bored watching cat videos all day). More at the b@lls than the ingenuity. It takes a certain kind of person (and not necessarily a good kind) to actually try to get away with something like that.
Anonymous
Rumor has it one person recently let go from my current employer was doing this. They were essentially working as a consultant (doing same work as their regular job) from the office. They felt they weren’t doing anything wrong since they were meeting all their deadlines, but obviously the company felt differently. Agree with anon above that it’s been explicitly forbidden at all of my career employers. As in, we must sign something every year saying that we won’t do it – which makes me think that it’s common enough to go through the effort.
Anon
One of my execs got canned for this, among other things… and the consulting on the side was the LEAST scandalous part!
Anon For This
You can’t just mention scandal and then not elaborate, my curiosity is killing me.
Anon
Well, for instance, he had a stripper mistress that he brought to a work conference. He was seen there by our client with her in the hotel hot tub and introduced her as his wife. Our client asked us about it when he came back and said “she looked like JWow”.
Carrie
I haven’t, but I have worked with people who have.
When I was in graduate school working in a lab, a technician worked full time with me. But it was a struggle for me to get him to work a reasonably full day, as he was running his side business of basically being a slum lord at the same time. He bought up low end properties in depressed areas (Boston area) before the housing market skyrocketed. He would minimally rehab them himself and then rent them out. He would be juggling phone calls as the building “manager” during the day, doing financial stuff on the computer, sometimes skipping out for extended lunches to take care of problems. He was basically only working in the lab because he wanted the benefits, and knew he could get away with goofing off in the lab for a couple of hours a day because no one was watching too closely.
He actually asked the BOSS if he could specifically work with me. I was the only woman in the lab, and he thought I would let him get away with it….
I’ve had several friends who’ve done small internet side business… usually selling stuff on ebay or doing crafty stuff and selling online.
Maddie Ross
I think it’s totally different to sell things on eBay or have an etsy business on the side of a real job than be moonlighting out of your workplace on a second, potentially conflict-creating, job.
cc
its really not that brilliant? people do that stuff all the time. just like they do some wedding planning or shopping etc. def deserves firing but I dont see what is so brilliant about it?
Brant
YES! My first roommate after college did this! She had an admin type job and started/was trying to start some kind of online golf store thing on this side while at work. She apparently (according to her…she was also a chronic liar), she got canned beause she asked the advice of her colleagues on how various aspects of the biz.
anon
I think what Sneaky Sneaky is describing is totally unethical and definitely a firing offense. I think that’s pretty clear cut.
I teach college classes (usually online but also in person) in my free time. I’m careful never to send emails or make calls during 8-5 M-F unless it’s an emergency, and then I do it on my “lunch hour” on my personal laptop at Starbucks. I have disclosed that to my employer and it’s on my resume.
I would also like to do some consulting but moonlighting like that is not normally allowed in my industry (finance) while still employed.
I am also writing a novel and would never write on the computer at work or make notes at work. I do admit to outlining plots in my head while in boring meetings, though.
Partner-in-Waiting?
I work in a small firm that up until now has had one owner. It looks as though a partnership is in my future and since I don’t have ELLEN’s father to negotiate for me, I am looking for wisdom and suggestions on what I need to think about since we’ll be creating this from scratch.
Any comments are truly appreciated; war stories are encouraged.
Ms. P
Partner-in-Waiting: We must be at the same firm – I don’t know where to start! Subscribing to the comments :).
Need to Improve
Congratulations!
I would start by figuring out what kind of partnership (legal entity) you would want to form. Since there is only one owner now, what kind of an entity is the firm? What are the legal, tax, etc. implications of the different structures you could adopt as you become a two-person partnership?
Also, how is partnership share determined? Based on origination of business? If yes, how does one determine origination credit? Or is everything split 50-50? If 50-50, what are the expectations for bringing in business? How much time does the other partner put into this?
(former) preg 3L
How do you all think these booties would look with a skirt? I think I need cuter commuting shoes…
Parfait
Those specific ones look more pants-compatible to me. I have these that I do wear with skirts:
http://www.myshoes.com/romantic-soles/stephanie/brown
I leave it to people more fashion-articulate than myself to explain why one might work better than the other. I think it’s the slight angle of the ankle opening? Slightly less block-like heel? Dunno.
EduStudent
I think pretty much all booties look better with pants, but these do work with skirts, in my experience, because the top hits right below the ankle bone. Most ankle booties cover the ankle and can make legs look stumpy, but that’s less of an issue with these.
anon
I’ve worn them with tights and a skirt – I think they look good, and I agree that it helps that these expose the ankle. (oh! the horror! LOL) I am not typically a bare legged booties wearer, though.
BigLaw and Drugs
I heard from a friend of a friend of mine that BigLaw is full of coc*ine – that to work so hard, associates use it to focus. How true is this in your experience?
Toffee
Well, that must be what I’m doing (or not doing) wrong. I’m exhausted, miserable, and not at all succeeding.
Edit: I don’t do cocaine.
LH
In Biglaw, I don’t know of anyone that does cocaine.
Anonymous
I don’t know about BigLaw, but cocaine use was rumored to be the thing according to my Wall St investment bank analyst-friends, in the early 2000’s. I was in a mid-market investment bank so no cocaine for me :-)
Anon For This
I don’t know about BigLaw, but cocaine use was rumored to be the thing according to my Wall St investment bank analyst-friends, in the early 2000’s. I was in a mid-market investment bank so no cocaine for me :-)
Ginny
My understanding was lawyers are alcoholics, people in finance do cocaine, doctors abuse rx drugs. If we are going on stereotypes. That said, no one I know in any of these fields has any of these habits.
Curly Sue
I’m in BigLaw and don’t use cocaine, but I definitely know people who do.
Alanna of Trebond
I am so amused that cocaine is not moderated but other, much more innocuous words are.
Probably simple question about loans
Apropos of the comment above…if you are in a loan repayment program (federal, but supplemented by a university-sponsored program), and are not currently making payments because your income does not exceed the threshold, can you refinance? I’m just thinking, my husband has student loans, but 80% of the loan amount will be forgiven over the course of the next 2 years and 3 months through one of these programs. I was thinking we’d look into refinancing the remaining loan balances as soon as that time is up, but could I do that now?
ETA: Obviously a question to ask the entity repaying the loans rather than strangers on the internet, but if anyone has a quick answer I’d be glad to hear it.
Single lady looking for puppy love!
Would getting a puppy be the final nail in my coffin as far as being forever single goes? I feel as if getting a pet replaces having a relationship if you’re not careful. Or perhaps a puppy would be a guy magnet? Thoughts?
Red Beagle
Guy magnet, definitely. I don’t know for sure if my DH would have asked me out the first time if I didn’t have a dog… and we’ve had dogs together ever since, 14 years later.
AnonForThis
Guy magnet for sure. I am married but have never been hit on so much as when I’m walking my puppy!
hijkmnop
I’ve always thought that dogs–especially friendly dogs–make it so much easier to strike up conversations with random people. So no, I don’t see it being a nail in your coffin of singleness. If you were asking whether to get a fifth cat, maybe…(kidding!)
(sort of.)
Single lady looking for puppy love!
Yeah, i think feared the “crazy cat lady” stigma. LOL! I’m definitely not there yet. Well this has been encouraging! Thanks ladies!!
Anonymous
I don’t think it’s a nail in the single coffin, because as much as I love my pup I still feel lonely for a relationship, so the dog is not a stand-in.
And it’s definitely easier to strike up conversations with random people but IME it’s far from a guy magnet. Maybe it’s because I have a mini and guys don’t want to act too interested in a “girly dog,” but the guys I’ve dated have fallen into one of three camps: (1) totally indifferent, (2) attempt to make buddies and pet him when they pick me up, but really only because they get annoyed with even just one second of him barking at a strange man in the doorway, or (3) super annoyed with dog’s existence and how it prevents me from staying over, being gone all day, or going somewhere straight from work.
Lola
The only possible downside is that taking care of the god (while trying to work long hours) may eat up a lot of your free “dating” time.
Single lady looking for puppy love!
I know it was a typo, but I really liked how you called your dog “god.” I’m sure he or she feels like a god when they’re taking up your free time! :)
health care anon
Can I put in my .02 cents? Please adopt from a local shelter or rescue group. Those are the best places to start. You might also want to volunteer locally with the shelter or rescue group to get a feel for the age and type of dog you want. A lot of times a dog 2-3 years old will have grown out of the puppy phase and may be potty trained (bonus!). I’m happy to help with any questions you might have as I volunteer in animal welfare locally. Not sure how we could connect off here?
Kiki
I like these booties a lot as they are basic — but are they boring? (I always lean toward too conservative — I’m at an age (41) where I would like to buy more quality or more statement. These are both low priced and fairly boring) but I do think they are a very nice basic that I would wear all the time. So what to do.
ss
So buy them, see if you do indeed love and wear them all the time, and then when they die replace them with similar but better quality.
Kiki
that is a very good point. But I’ve already done that. Wore my basic black booties down to the stud. But maybe I should Just do that again.
AIMS
I have these (below) in a higher heel version and really like them. Same idea, comfy, but a little more unique because of the back zipper and the peek of red (it’s more pronounced on mine so may be more pronounced on these and I get compliments on these all the time, they’re very cute). And bonus: they’re even less!
http://www.6pm.com/dv-by-dolce-vita-marce-black
Paging Sarabeth
If you have a total of 12 days, I would pick either Australia or NZ, but try to avoid splitting time between them. For my money, I much prefer NZ. I would fly in to Sydney, and spend 2 days there, then 3 days for Great Barrier Reef, and the balance 5-6 days would either be in Australia ( hunter valley, Alice springs, Melbourne, etc) or entirely spent in NZ’ s South Island.
AN
Batgirl
Seconded!
Sarabeth
Thanks!!
Boots for an in-between calf size
Does anyone have any recommendations for a pair of tall riding style boots that are wider than 15″ circumference but not “wide calf”? I’ve ordered 6 pairs from zappos so far and found that the standard 15″ circumference is a bit snug on the fullest part of my calf, but the 16″ wide calf is huge because my leg is narrower under my knee. If the boot comes in all black with an ankle buckle/detail, that’s a big plus!
Monday
I have very similar needs to yours. Try Corso Como–their regular-width riding boots have worked for me, though their other styles of boot have been too narrow.