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Update: There are several options for these shorts included in the 2022 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, with some colors and sizes as low as $22.50.
July 2024 Update: The biggest sale of the year — the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale — starts July 15! (Unfamiliar with the NAS? Check out this page for more info on why it's the best sale of the year.) Sign up for our newsletter to stay on top of all the major workwear sales, or check out our roundup of the latest sales on workwear!
The below content is about the 2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale.
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These shorts caught my eye when we did our roundup for the best women's shorts for summer a few weeks ago — they're bestsellers, with a ton of amazing ratings at most stores that sell them. There are a few great options in the 2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale (including plus sizes!), as well as a few options that are outside the sale (including some pretty floral ones).
(See all of our choices for the 2020 Nordstrom Anniversary Sale here — I'll try to do a bigger roundup ASAP!)
They're $30–$35 full price, and available at Nordstrom, Zappos, Amazon, and Nike.
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Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Sales of note for 8.30.24
- Nordstrom – Summer Sale, save up to 60%
- Ann Taylor – 30% off full-price purchase; $99 jackets, dresses & shoes; extra 50% off sale
- Banana Republic Factory – 50-70% off everything + extra 20% off
- Bergdorf Goodman – Final Days Designer Sale, up to 75% off; extra 20% off sale
- Boden – 20% off
- Brooks Brothers – Extra 25% off clearance
- Eloquii – Up to 60% off everything; extra 60% off all sale
- J.Crew – 40% off sitewide; extra 60% off sale styles
- J.Crew Factory – Extra 20% off orders $125+; extra 60% off clearance; 60%-70% off 100s of styles
- Lo & Sons – Summer sale, up to 50% off (ends 9/2)
- Madewell – Extra 40% off sale; extra 50% off select denim; 25% off fall essentials
- M.M.LaFleur – Save 25% sitewide
- Rothy's – End of season sale, up to 50% off
- Spanx – Lots of workwear in the big sale, some up to 70% off
- Talbots – 25% off regular-price purchase; 70% off clearance
- White House Black Market – Up to 70% off sale
Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Anon
Looking for a recommendation for an accountant with expertise in tax advice for my fledgling new consulting business.
Anon
Adding – I am in the Bay Area but I don’t see any reason the accountant would necessarily need to be local to me.
Lobbyist
Alison Turner and Associates in Sacramento. Her firm is all women. They are great.
eertmeert
https://www.tldraccounting.com/ Toni is a character, but dedicated to clients. If she isn’t a good fit, she will have referrals for you.
Anon
Thanks so much. I made an initial appointment.
Summer leggings
I live in the SEUS. It is hot but OMG is it humid. And yet I see people out walking and running in leggings. Are there summer-weight breathable leggings? I would love something very light and wicking (chub rub is a 4 season problem, so the summer is a struggle, and I’d love to go on walks in the morning/evening when it is cooler). But the ones I have I can barely stand to have on because they are just so much oppressive fabric in this weather.
anon
I can’t stand leggings in this weather, either. I have a pair of Brooks greenlight capris that are as lightweight and breathable that I’ve found. I can wear those without too much discomfort.
Is it Friday yet?
I have two pair of Arcteryx Oriel leggings – they’re the lightest ones I’ve found and I think are bearable in the heat.
Anon
Check out Oiselle Roga 7″ (the long Roga) shorts. They’re not tight, but take care of any potential rubbing and are really comfortable in the heat.
SmallLawAtl
Yes–I have what one would politely call “athletic” thighs and would rudely call “chubby” thighs, and I run in the Long Roga exclusively. TTS. No chafing. I don’t understand the leggins/tights thing in the summer, either. It’s like their side of the trail has a different climate or something.
anon
I love Lululemon’s On the Go Fly pants. I have the Crop in Woven fabric. They are comfy, light, and stink-resistant. The Woven is a little dressier so can do double-duty on business trips.
NY CPA
I wore Old Navy activewear cropped leggings to Disney World in July (100 deg heat + like 90% humidity) and was fine. The ones I liked best were a performance wicking material and have mesh panels that go behind the knees that help a lot with cooling off, but I wore regular cotton/spendex ones as well and they weren’t that bad.
LaurenB
So, how was Disney World in July? Did it feel safe?
Anonymous
I’m sure she means Disney World in 2019 or earlier.
Wondering
I wanted to thank everyone who responded to my post yesterday about what leads to successful relationships. I appreciated your thoughts. Someone pointed out that this is partly a problem caused by the internet dating age – we fill out forms with desired qualities rather than meeting people organically. You gave me some valuable insight on prioritizing qualities other than the ability (as one person put it) to discuss the impact of American intervention on developing economies. I have certainly fallen victim to the perception that I should be looking to be half of a power couple.
At any rate I appreciate your input – especially from those of you who have long-term marriages.
Anne
I’ll add some thoughts: #1 each of your sense of who should do household work (and actually ability and willingness to do it day in and day out) should add up to 110% (totally fine if you want traditional gender roles, or one person likes to cook and one person likes to clean, or you both have the sense that you should split basically down the middle but it has to align so that stuff generally gets done without too much strife). The longer I’m married the more I think that being married is basically running a small business of a household or a household plus a child raising operation and the #1 trait to look for is someone who is going to run that business well with you. After that, #2 does interacting with that person make you want to interact more or less. You need more obvi. Marriage is long if you’re lucky. Marriage in a pandemic is VERY long if you’re lucky. Whatever you like doing together (talking, games, sports, TV) has to make you want to keep doing it with that person. #3 physical connection — they don’t have to check your attribute boxes necessarily (and often don’t) but being physical should feel expansive.
anon
YES, THIS. Marriage is like running a small business with the one you love. Particularly, and especially, if kids are involved.
Ellen
I would love to be married so that I could have someone else do some of the work with me. Right now, I have NO prospects and am not abel to meet men wearing a mask, b/c they have no idea what I look like, and that is what attracts men to me. By the time this panemic is over, I will be to old to attract decent men. FOOEY!
Anon
+1 million. I have commented here before that I feel like at this point, my long marriage is an entity separate from either myself or my husband that requires its own care, feeding and maintenance. I love the “marriage/household as a small business” analogy and think it is really apt. Running a household is like running a mini-business and that’s where I feel like I did not get enough preparation or education from my parents and had to learn so much on the fly – how to keep the machine humming so that there is food in the fridge, the appliances work, the place is clean enough that CPS doesn’t get called, etc. AND how to do that on top of having a paying job. If I did not have a competent, engaged and dedicated co-CEO to do this with me, my life would be so much harder. He’s the best choice I ever made because my marriage to my husband has meant everything in my life – my job, my home, my parenting, even caring for our dogs – is easier and not harder.
Anne
Yes! I am very happy with my marriage for the most part after some early intense growing pains but I was totally totally unprepared that my marriage’s focus would necessarily be the day in and day out of keeping a household running together. My parents always emphasized love, attraction, and mutual interest and never ever suggested thinking about the “co-CEO” part of it. I honestly never thought about the WORK parts of this partnership while dating, which I think was really to my detriment and the cause of a lot of the early growing pains.
anon
I didn’t get to chime in yesterday, but I’ll say this much. DH and I have been married for 17 years, together for 20. And I think we’re happier than most couples we know. We have a few overlapping interests, but we also have very separate interests that we don’t share with each other. (I couldn’t care less about concerts; DH loves them. I adore reading; DH is highly educated but will never pick up a book for fun.) And that’s really OK — it keeps things interesting and gives us something to talk about! Our overall values are compatible and we want the same things from life: raising a happy family, a strong friendship with each other and being good stewards to our community. But more to the point, we actually like and respect each other. I have several friends who have been married just as long as I have, who still love their husbands but also very clearly resent them for a number of reasons. In many cases, you could see the fractures even when they were dating, and they had zero to do with shared interests or being on the same intellectual wavelength.
Anon
+1 to compatible values matter a lot more than shared interests. I’m someone who doesn’t really share interests with my husband. I think he’s funny, kind, I enjoy talking to him, he’s a great dad, etc. but there isn’t a lot we “do” together. I know some people who think it’s weird, but I think we have a stronger marriage than a lot of couples I know who share a lot of hobbies.
anonshmanon
+2 for the shared values. DH and I agree mostly on goals, and agree mostly on what needs fixing. This forms the basis of feeling like you are on the same team. We can have very spirited debates about the best approaches HOW to fix things. This applies to debates about gun violence or income inequality, but also to how to come up with ground rules to limit buying more plants for the house (and which of the rules get broken).
Anon
Months ago, I posted asking if it was normal that my two best friends were shocked that my husband would call the doctor for me to help with an extremely complex, tiring medical issue I was experiencing (“my husband would never do that, you’re so lucky.”) There were some great comments on that post on both sides, but one that stood out was something like “my husband and I wouldn’t be where we are today if we kept score on helping each other or refused to help when the other is vulnerable.” That has stuck with me and I’ve striven to make sure that I am there for my spouse the same way he has been there for me – no scorecard, no huffiness, no resentment.
Equestrian Attorney
I wasn’t on that thread, but I just wanted to add my own experience: my ex-husband and I were compatible in all the obvious ways. We were often described as the perfect couple by our friends. You know what we weren’t compatible on? Respect for one another, core values, opinions on how to raise children and gender roles. It took me a while to realize the extent of this as we moved into adulthood because we had always been the “perfect couple”, and it led to a rough divorce. My current partner and I are not that compatible on paper, don’t have that much in common in terms of interests or hobbies or whatever, and probably wouldn’t have matched on the internet. The first 45 minutes of our first date were awkward and we struggled to find common ground. But I’m so glad we powered through that – he is hard-working, considerate, caring, and genuinely puts me first. I never doubt that he’s on my team, and I would take that over the stimulating intellectual debates I had with my ex any day.
Masking forever?
From this morning, do you think we’ll be masking forever (if not for coronavirus, then for something else)?
To me, this would mean never really having to care about my bad skin or wear makeup to cover it up, but I would also miss lipstick (stains masks inside). And how would this work with eating out or going to the movies (and eating popcorn)? Or dating?
I could maybe get over wearing masks on a plane (but I snack a lot on planes so my ears don’t pop plus I just am a snacker). Or on mass transit (like I visit NYC a lot for work, but at home am a suburban car commuter). Will we wear masks in winter like kids do sometimes if skiing or it is very cold (balaclavas)?
I guess I really miss restaurants. I miss travel, but could deal with masks for that.
I also really need to re-up my electrolysis, which isn’t really happening now it seems. I guess in a mask it doesn’t matter as much :(
Anon
Forever and ever and ever? No.
“A year (or two) feels like forever”? Yes.
Senior Attorney
If it means we’re not all eating and drinking 24/7, everywhere we go, I’m all for it. Save the money, save the calories, save the mess.
I think masks will be more common going forward. Apparently in a lot of Asia it’s quite common for people to mask up if they’re ill and I think we will see that.
Anonymous
So no more “is this water bottle profesh” questions? No sippy cups of any sort.
Anonymous
If this means the end of vaping, I am all in.
anon8
Yeah, I agree that they will be more common. It will seem more normal to wear them, especially during cold and flu season. If was flying or taking public transport, I would definitely wear a mask.
Vicky Austin
I kind of feel like eating popcorn at the movies isn’t going to come back from this. The only thing grosser than a movie theater floor is a movie theater floor you can get COVID from.
Anon
I think movie theatres aren’t going to come back, period. They were struggling even before Covid.
Vicky Austin
Yeah, what with all the movies being released direct to Disney+ or whatever right now, that seems like a strong possibility.
Anonymous
Honestly, I want them to continue to exist. I just will not watch a movie at home as a movie. Too many distractions (kids, chores, WFH, homeschooling). Home is no place of peace for me now. It used to be my escape. But for a movie, it’s like an isolation chamber (in the best possible way, sort of like how a spa is) to see it in a theater. There is nothing to do but let go and take it in, and it would be such an escape. At home, it is so subpar as to not bother.
Ribena
We have a few cinemas now that are seeing that and going all-in on the luxurious experience. So you pay a little more than the standard multiplex but you get a sofa seat and they can bring food and wine to your seat ahead of the film start time.
Anon100
Agree with you on the isolation chamber aspect that makes going to the movies enjoyable before the pandemic.
I suspect the movie theaters will have to go all-out premium experiences with La-Z-Boy type recliners, offer really expensive marked up fancy drinks, possibly have “private boxes” like the opera, etc to make the business model work in the future.
Anonymous
I will say that home is a hell hole right now. I wanted to cry in my kitchen — all I do is cook, clean, repeat. Even with kids and spouse “helping”, there is always a vacuum to run, laundry, to do, etc. We are home all the time and eveything is just well-used and needs a scrub. And guess what, even if you’re done, you’re home, and will need to just do it again. There is no rest. No peace except in sleep.
I can lock-in my concentration enough to get some work done, but that’s it. 2 hours for a movie when I hit something sticky on the floor going to the bathroom or can here that the wash is ready to go into the dryer . . . just no. I can watch Ozark or whatever, but I want a movie to be a big treat where I sink into another reality and just can never get there. For my attention span at home multi-multi-multi-tasking, Parks and Rec is fine.
I long for the gym. For any sustained activity, I again, need to leave the house. Walking, hiking, bike ride is what does it. Not something where there is a swiffer that needs to swiff.
Anonie
I agree! I miss movie theaters so much. My fiance and my mom are both avid movie theater fans like me…I haven’t heard anyone else express that they’re missing theaters, but surely we aren’t the only ones. Movie theaters are just pure escapism in a wholesome way and watching a movie from home doesn’t compare (to me).
Anon
Anonie, I am definitely with you, I miss the movies a lot. We have a theater in our city that’s part of an independent chain where we are where you can get full dinners and beer with your movie, and I really hope it can come through this. I was thinking today about my late grandmother – there was nothing she loved more than going to the movies and I think I picked up my love of going to the movies from going with her so many times when I was a kid. I hope theaters come back.
Anon
Yeah, I decided I was done with movie theaters pre-COVID. I’d rather watch a movie at home where I can wear pajamas, pay a more reasonable price, pause whenever I need to, cuddle with my cat, and avoid other people talking/texting during the movie.
Anonymous
I live with people at home that I see 24/7 and could use a break from. A hushed theater (movie, play, etc.) sounds dreamy. Enforced silence, no talking, no chores giving you the side-eye from the corner of the room.
anon8
I was thinking the same thing. I enjoy going to the movies, but don’t know if that would be something I would be comfortable doing now. With sold out shows, you’re packed right next to each other and people are eating and drinking the whole time.
Ellen
Vicky, I mean nothing bad, but how in the world can you even get COVID from the floor of a movie theater unless you pick up and eat the popcorn you drop on the floor? YUCKIES! You should never be doing that even before COVID! Rosa warned her kids never to eat off the floor years ago, and not to drop any food on the floor for the puppy, b/c the floor is dirty! Movie theater floors are even dirty b/c of the sugary soda and other liquid stuff people leave that dries all yucky and sticky as you sit there. PTOOEY!
Anon
I don’t think masks will be mandated once we have a widely available vaccine and/or the virus has burned itself out and is no longer at pandemic levels. That should happen within a couple years.
I think a lot of people, me included, will continue wearing masks in crowded indoor spaces during cold and flu season. I’m in favor of anything that makes me less likely to get the flu or even a common cold. I actually don’t really mind masks at all and can definitely see myself wearing them on public transit in the winter for the rest of my life.
History Buff
The short answer is no. I do not think we will be wearing masks forever (a lot of people will not even wear them now!) This will end – either because we get a vaccine or because the virus mutates or because we discover more effective treatments so the mortality rate is more like the seasonal flu or because it kills 2% of the population. (And to be clear I am not advocating for the acceptability of the last one.) But it will end. And I would bet money that within 2 years we will be back to “normal” despite everyone’s predications about how this will change everything. In fact, we will go back to normal and people will actively and affirmatively refuse to think about this time.
Look at the 1918 epidemic. Best estimates are that it infected one-third of the world’s population. It killed at least 50 million worldwide and about 675,000 in the US – at a time when the population was much smaller. And it disproportionately killed young people. And yet when it ended (around 1920) the world went on to completely forget it had ever happened. There has been some really interested analysis of news coverage in the 1920’s on this point. How many people studies WWI in school and in what depth? How many people studied the “Spanish Flu”? And yet the latter killed a lot more people (although admittedly the geo-political fallout was much smaller.)
i realize that this seems impossible and a lot of people will disagree with me. But pandemics rarely change history once they are over (although they can certainly change it while they are going on) unless they kill enough people to be statistically significant – which I think basically last happened (horrifically and catestrophically) in the 16th century (although I might be corrected on this point by someone with more expertise in modern history).
Anonymous
May I ask what history points to in regards to joblessness, homelessness, food shortages, education, inflation, business closures … anything about how the lower/middle class fared/recovery after the 1918 pandemic? I know that’s a broad question but if you have additional points of interest or if you could point me to some reading material that would be great. I’m more under the impression that it took decades to recover normalcy vs completely forgetting about it within 2 years or by the 1920s, but I’m not sure why.
Anonymous
Not that commenter, but it can’t have taken decades. You went through the Roaring 20s and then the stock market crash that really set people back (like the Joads, the dust bowl, anti-Okie laws, etc.). Then when the US entered WW2, WW2 was a problem but put everyone back to work somehow or another. Then you’re at the 1950s. But the stock market crash of 1929 was what was wretched. I think people could have had whiplash, depending on if they were born on/before 1900: WW1, pandemic, Roaring20s, depression, WW2, nuclear bomb, subdivisions, automatic transmission, TV. Surreal.
Anon
My father was born in 1923 and he never heard anyone in his family even mention it (I just asked him recently).
Senior Attorney
I was just telling my husband the other day that my grandmother was born in 1903 and I never heard her mention a word about it. I’m so sorry I never thought to ask about it!
LaurenB
I have done a lot of family genealogy in Philadelphia and the level of 1918/1919 deaths that are attributed to influenza has always been off the charts. If you hadn’t known there had been a pandemic, you sure would have once you started poking around death certificate and cemeteries. A lot of young people dying.
Anonymous
Thanks everyone!
History Buff
Good question! The problem is that recovery from the 1918 epidemic is essentially impossible to separate from the recovery from WWI (especially in Europe which saw a lot more economic devastation but even in the US). On the level of individual families, the loss of the primary wage earner was obviously horrific. But there is no evidence that the closures in 1918-1919 resulted in a widespread economic downtown. There was a brief recession in the US (in the economic sense) in 1921 that caused the unemployment numbers to spike to above 8% but we cannot really tie that to the epidemic.
I suspect the 1918 epidemic did not have the economic fall out of the current one, partly because so many more people were farmers (I am not sure about 1918 but it was about 38 percent in 1900) and manufacturing – (around 31% in 1990).
In short, the economy has changed so much in the last 100 years that I am not sure any economic parallels can be drawn. I was speaking more of social changes, where the response to the 1918 flu and the 2020 Covid-19 epidemic have been startlingly similar).
If anything I think we should be looking at the response to the Great Depression for thoughts about our recovery this time around. Although hopefully the impact of Keynesian economic theories will help mitigate the fall out faster. I would not be surprised if 100 years from now, we point to this as the end of the American Century but in that event I imagine Covid will be the final straw rather than the root cause (taking off my historian hat for a moment, I think that was coming anyway. This might just accelerate it.)
Anon
I grew up knowing about the Spanish Flu. I wonder if it was just a big deal to my family or why that was. I also always thought of it as context for the flu vaccine program.
Sadie
but the flu vaccine wasn’t available on a large scale in the US till the ’40s.
Anon
I meant that I understood the flu vaccine program as part of an effort to be prepared for the “next” influenza pandemic on the level of the 1918 pandemic.
Anon
If we don’t abolish animal consumption yeah we will be masking forever.
Anon
I sure hope they aren’t a permanent thing! Don’t get me wrong, currently I always wear my mask in all required settings. Wearing them makes me miserable, however. I just hate it. I don’t know if I’m more sensitive than other people, but while driving, I see people wearing them alone in their cars and I cannot even fathom such a thing.
If it is necessary to slow the spread of a pandemic under unusual and extreme circumstances, fine, I’ll do my part. But I am not signing on to wearing a mask in public for the rest of my life to avoid the normal spread of colds and other viral infections during cold weather months. I would prefer to get a cold, or even occasionally the flu, than wear a mask all the time. That said, if others feel more comfortable wearing them or would suffer more adverse effects from getting sick, I am all for them doing whatever makes them feel safest. Based upon my own risk/benefit analysis, I won’t be doing it though.
ANON
+1
anonshmanon
I also see lots of masked up people inside their cars! The different masks I’ve tried so far are all fine for a 30minute grocery shop, but get uncomfortable quick.
About your second paragraph, I think, hypothetically, this experience could move people to wear mask routinely when they are under the weather. A temporary thing as a courtesy for their fellow humans. In the bay area, I would occasionally see a person from Asia doing it in the before times. My understanding is that in some circles (trying to not lump all cultures in Asia together here), this is part of the being-a-good-neighbor behavior set, with peer pressure attached. Somewhere between not littering and holding the door for somebody.
I go back and forth between thinking that the US will be the last place where individuals will inconvenience themselves even in this small way, and reminding myself that change can happen, either through public campaigning (smoking), or very slowly, through individual choice (vegetarianism).
LaurenB
I think we’ll be masking for a long time, and I think handshakes are officially dead in the water. Apparently the infectious-disease medical community have always thought handshakes should be abolished.
Senior Attorney
I will be a tiny bit sorry to see the end of handshakes but I will not miss social hugging one bit.
Anonymous
Yesss, it’s nice to identify a win. I moved from a nice normal place (Just kidding) to a city where people cheek kiss & … Yuck. Take it away!!
Anon
My friend lives in France and jokes that the only good thing about the pandemic is the end of la bise.
Forever
I am from Spain and I certainly hope this is not true! I realize Americans (and to a lesser extent northern Europeans) are weird about touching each other but the triple kiss (in the part of Spain I am from) is a cherished part of home and our culture.
Honestly the tone here is a little disappointing. Do not kiss if you do not want to (we understand) but the judgmental comments about someone else’s culture are really not necessary. I suspect that this type of comment would be far less acceptable if it was applied to an African or Asian cultural practice.
Anon
I’m sorry I offended you, and I do hope that if you want to continue the cheek kissing that’s possible for you at some point in the future. At the same time, I would point that you’re judging my culture (“Americans are weird about touching each other”) every bit as much as I was judging yours. And the friend I was referring to lives in France and works at a French company, and before COVID, cheek kisses were as common in her workplace as handshakes were in the US. It wasn’t really something she could opt out of the way you can decline physical touch in a social setting if you’re not feeling it. Also strongly disagree that African/Asian cultural customs are immune from criticism. See eg., the spirited debates that have happened here about asking guests to take shoes off in your home, which is the cultural norm in many Asian countries.
Anon
Probably for the near future (1.5-2 years).
Also because wearing a mask is not the same as the 6-feet social distancing.
Don't postpone testing and medical care
FWIW, I was due for a biopsy in early spring because my paps kept coming back funny. I finally had the biopsy after a COVID test and quarantining (no exposure, just for the doctor’s practice’s preference). The results were not good — what had been ASCUS had become CIN-2. By the time I had the tissue removed, it had progressed to CIN-3 — that’s the last step before officially becoming cancer. This is all in <6 months. So: please don't defer your health. Things other than COVID can kill you or wreck your health.
ITLady
They never told me the exact term for my abnormal cells, but they said the cells they removed during a leep (which ended up needing to be a full D&C to get it all) were at the last step before its officially cancer.
If its helpful, all of my paps have come back normal since then, so getting yours removed might be the end of it! Crossing my fingers that it turns out for you the same.
LaurenB
At least around here, ob-gyn offices were still open during the lockdown as an essential service – obviously pregnant women still needed to be seen, and though most low-risk women were postponing routine paps/mammograms (kind of like postponing your dental cleaning or eye exam), those who needed biopsies or who had other risk factors were still being seen. I am glad you got the treatment you needed.
Anon
This is kind of a flippant response to someone who had a serious health scare. I had a biopsy delayed for more than four months and know other people who had biopsies delayed too. The pregnant women I know did not get much in-person prenatal care – they got some but way less than you normally would. A lot of people have missed out on important, non-routine healthcare over the last six months. It’s a thing that happened.
anonchicago
Flippant and inaccurate. LaurenB is in the Chicago suburbs; I’m downtown and my OBGYN canceled an appointment in April. They did telehealth only except for pregnant women at high risk. No routine tests either since the major hospital systems and lab companies were focused on Covid capacity.
Anonymous
Yup, I’m in the Chicago suburbs too and we were telehealth only for several months except for emergencies. You could not get routine screenings like paps or mammograms even if you wanted them, and biopsies and other follow-up procedures to concerning mammograms or paps were postponed. Emergency means, like, you have a heart attack and collapse, you can go to the ER.
Anon
What’s wrong with you? You’re reading so much negativity into LaurenB’s compassionate response ?
LaurenB
I said I was glad she got the treatment she needed. Sheesh.
Ses
Sorry to hear about this awful experience, and thank you for the reminder.
Anon
I’m so sorry, and I’m hopeful this treatment was successful for you. Thanks so much for the reminder of the importance of paying attention to your health, and I’m sending you best wishes.
We have also experienced the affects of covid delays for medical appointments (although less serious). I posted on Moms earlier this week about how we missed a routine visit to my son’s dentist due to baby coming a month early, then covid hit and his office was closed. By the time we were able to get an appointment to go back, a cavity in a molar that we thought was successfully arrested with silver diamine fluoride progressed to the point of needing a baby root canal to save the tooth and a silver cap. You can’t really see it, but it still kills me.
As I said there, learn from me and make sure to catch up with your routine visits. It’s so important!
Anonymous
Anyone know how large the pocket in these is? Telling me there is a pocket without having size dimensions or a picture is less than helpful. (Basically, will it fit the average-sized cell phone?)
ATL rette
Assuming it’s the same as the ones I had in college a handful of years ago, it’s basically big enough for a key. Maybe a credit card. Not a phone, sadly.
Anon
It might fit a Chapstick. The pockets suck and definitely will not fit a cell phone.
ITLady
Yep as others said, they’re really small. At best I can fit a credit card and a key.
Still though, I adore them. But thats a hold over of my college days. They’re hella comfy and haven’t appeared to age a bit since 2011.
Another anon
To be fair, if you put a cell phone in the pocket of elastic waist running shorts, they are going to fall down pretty quickly, no?
Anon
In my experience, yes.
I have some Athleta running shorts with a pocket big enough for a cell phone but if I try to do any actual running or hiking with the phone, they fall down.
Anon
(They’re still great shorts, though)
Anonymous
Agree. I have some Under Armour ones that have real pockets. I wear both those and these Nikes.
Anon
I have a skincare rec. I was looking for a light serum to go under my BB cream. I ended up with Olay Tone Perfection Serum B3 + Vitamin C, based on a 5 star review on Beautypedia. I’ve used it for a couple of weeks now and I’m really happy with it. My skin looks clear and I have less redness.
It’s reasonably priced at most drugstores and Amazon.
Anon
Glad you found something!
Threadjack – I’m using the Ordinary azelaic acid and the moisturizing factors on top of it (per their regimen recommendation), but my forehead in particular seems to be greasier. I know others here have had a lot of success with that brand. How much of the moisturizer do you use and do you think it’s too much for every day use?
Z
I just kind of squeeze out a line like the width of my finger tip, rub it between my fingers then put it on my face, dabbing first on the cheeks, then chin, then what’s left for the forehead and nose. Definitely do not need a lot!
ANON
I have been pretty depressed this month, like most Americans, and I went to the pediatrician’s office yesterday (not our regular doc). Out of nowhere, not after being asked, he started saying how we aren’t going to have a vaccine until next fall, school is not going to go back for this entire school year, etc. He could be right, but that isn’t what I’ve read in the news, and frankly, it is NOT what I needed to hear in the midst of my depression. I just felt like it was so out of touch – he had no idea what our situation was, if I was a single mom, if I was struggling, etc.
So, the doctor’s office is now asking me to take a survey. Should I mention that this came off wrong or am I being too sensitive?
Anon
Your feelings are valid, but I don’t think the doctor did anything wrong. I would let it go and try to talk a partner, friend, or loved one about it instead.
nuqotw
+1. I would guess he is saying it to everyone. I kind of assume that the pediatrician does know the broad strokes of your home life. Ours asks about it to get a sense of our kids’ environment and certainly its on all the paperwork that kids, spouse, and I all live at the same address.
Anon
I don’t think his comment was out of line. It’s pretty much what’s been in the news. Fauci is about the most optimistic expert on this, and he says we’ll have a vaccine approved this winter/early spring but it won’t be widely available until next summer at the earliest. Your pediatrician may also have been referring specifically to vaccines for children. They haven’t even started testing any of the candidate vaccines in kids, so the timeline for approval in kids is going to lag well behind approval for adults. I really wish more people were talking about this because I don’t see how we can go back to school in fall 2021 if whatever vaccine we have isn’t approved for use in children. Like a vaccine for adults is great and I will take it, but it doesn’t solve the back to school problem which is (at least in my opinion) the single biggest disruption caused by the pandemic.
ANON
But once adults get it, won’t community spread be low enough to peter out?
Anon
No one really knows (the 1918 flu went away when about 1/3rd of the population was immune), but most experts think Covid needs at least 70% of the population to be immune through vaccination or infection before herd immunity kicks in, and it could be as high as 95%. Even 70% would mean either 100% of the population has to get a 70% effective vaccine, or 70% of the population gets a 100% effective vaccine (or a middle ground in between those extremes). I don’t think a vaccine will be 100% effective, and I don’t think you can 70% of the population vaccinated without vaccinating any kids, especially given that right now almost half of adults say they won’t take a vaccine. If every adult were willing and able to get vaccinated, it might be a different story, but unfortunately that’s not the situation we have in this country.
anon
I actually think it’s a kindness to give people a realistic sense of what the next year will look like, even if it’s hard to hear. But perhaps his bedside manner was lacking?
ANON
Why is that kind? I’m genuinely asking.
Also, I don’t see how a pediatrician has some special insight on the vaccine such that his view is necessarily the realistic one. I haven’t seen anything that said a vaccine wouldn’t be ready until next fall.
Alexa
Knowledge of medicine, knowledge of the research process, reading medical journals and keeping up with more scientific news . .
Anon
Was he referring specifically to vaccines in children? I think he has insight into that. I am not a doctor but I know none of the vaccines now in Phase 3 rating in adults have had even early testing in kids so I think maybe he was making the point that it will be even longer until we have a vaccine approved for kids. And gently, yes, lots of people are saying next summer or fall for mass vaccination. There will be 6-12 months between vaccine approval and when young, healthy adults can get it. Fauci and everyone else is saying this regularly.
ANON
He wasn’t talking about kids. He was saying that the first people to get the vaccine would get it next fall.
Anon
Oh. In that case, he does seem more pessimistic than average, but I also don’t think he was wildly out of line for sharing his best guess about what will happen in the future.
Anonymous
If you want to buy into a fantasy fine but this doctor did nothing wrong.
anonshmanon
Why is that kind? <- turning this question around: I feel like when we shut down in March, pretending that this could be contained in a month and then pushing the goalpost out a month, and then another month, and then another month, and then a quarter and so on was maybe the right thing to prevent mass panic initially, but at some point it becomes ridiculous. At some point we need to face the truth.
Albatross
Yeah, at this point I don’t even believe my government officials when they say we’ll get to reopen when we meet the decline metrics that say it’s safe. The data’s not valid, or they’ve changed their minds on where the threshold should be, or something. It’s yet another veneer to make people go along with it.
Anonymous
+1
Anonymous
Another +1 here. I few so stupid that I genuinely believed the lockdown would only last 2 weeks.
Anonymous
+1
Anon
He was doing his job and yes, you are being too sensitive.
Vicky Austin
I disagree. There’s been a meme floating around about “well, yes, I AM sensitive. But why do I have to be less sensitive? Why can’t you be nicer?”
The doctor wasn’t unkind, though he probably could have read the room. I wouldn’t put it on the survey, OP. I doubt you’ll get much change that way. I’d vent to a friend and confront the doctor if it happens again.
Senior Attorney
I think it’s reasonable to say you didn’t like it, which isn’t exactly the same thing as “it came off wrong.” (Your reaction vs. his conduct, you know?)
Anonymous
He was out of line. His opinion on schools opening in 2021 is not a medical opinion (he didn’t say they shouldn’t open, he said they wouldn’t ) and it isn’t reliable. I admire my son’s pediatrician for his frankness, which my friends have found abrupt, but I would draw the line at Debbie downer speculation about things outside of his expertise. Get a new doctor.
Anonymous
lol, what? No, her depression is coloring this. What she should do is treat her depression and see if she still feels this way next month or whenever her ship has righted.
Anonymous
I think you’re being dramatically too sensitive. None of that should have been a surprise! It’s discussed every single day on here. I do think you should pursue treatment for your depression.
Anon
Make sure you’re able to differentiate between the message and the messenger. I’m sure that’s his opinion and he certainly has more expertise than most of us. From what I’ve read, I don’t disagree with him. His answer is at least in the range of likely outcomes.
If you feel his bedside manner was off, that’s another thing.
But if you’re feeling this way because you heard something you didn’t want to hear, then that’s a you problem.
Anonymous
He is in line with most medical professionals. If there is a vaccine at the end of the year it will go to healthcare professionals and high risk groups first. There is a commission working on guidelines for that. It will take time to manufacture it on a scale to reach the rest of us. I would not complain about him giving you accurate advice on what to expect for you and your child.
Anonymous
+1
Anon
If I’m understanding OP correctly, he said no one would get vaccinated before fall 2021, which isn’t the prevailing wisdom. We will know by November/December of this year if one of the vaccines currently in phase 3 trials works and is safe and if so, frontline workers will start getting vaccinated almost immediately. It will just take awhile to reach the rest of us, especially those of us who are younger and don’t have underlying health conditions. That said, even if he’s more pessimistic than most about the vaccine timeline I don’t think it merits a complaint. He’s just stating his opinion. If you don’t agree, ignore and move on.
Anonymous
I would answer the survey. It seems you are saying that the information was delivered poorly. I am assuming that part of the survey is to have feedback and provide training, if needed. You had not asked the doctor about when to expect a vaccine. It is possible that the practice would be unhappy that this doctor is providing opinions (whether reasonable or unreasonable) as to when a vaccine will be available.
Anonymous
Someone not liking the message shouldn’t be reason for others not to hear it, especially with something where medical debate is ongoing. The doctor was late, they lost your records, they missed telling you about alternative treatments—those are the sort of things you complain about. I personally don’t want cancel culture from one overly sensitive patient to stop my doctor from feeling she can give her views.You disagree, fine. But you don’t behave in a way then that may alter that person’s job. (Especially when the pediatrician may indeed be right for the reasons others stated.)
Anonymous
Are adults allowed to wear these shorts? My 13-year-old and her friends wear the black version with the white trim all the time. At any given moment, 50% of the teenage girls in our neighborhood are wearing them. If I tried to wear them, my daughter would get mad, make fun of me, or refuse to wear the four pairs she already owns.
Senior Attorney
Well, plainly you’re not allowed to wear them. Heh.
I don’t wear them because to me they fall on the wrong side of the “are these real clothing?” line. I don’t think they’re super appropriate for non-workout contexts.
Vicky Austin
That sounds like her problem, not yours.
Anonymous
I don’t want to look like mutton dressed as lamb!
anon
Hahaha, that sounds about right. These definitely read teenager to me. (Note that I still own three pairs from a decade ago, but they are my last-resort workout shorts.)
Anon
I have a pair of these that I actually just donated because they felt too teeenage-ish for 30-something mom me.
ITLady
I mean… I wear mine all the time in the warm months for running errands on the weekends. And with tshirts, occasionally a baseball cap, and either my slip on new balance sneakers, chacos, or my boat shoes depending on temps and what color shorts I’m wearing. Maybe that makes me the dated mom that never moved style wise beyond a certain year, but its my thing.
You can take my norts from my old, cold, dead hands.
I also have gotten to where IDGAF what others think about my clothes. I tend to skew more traditional preppy which is pretty abnormal in the midwest, but its also ME. (Think the more traditional looking Lilly Pulitzer dresses, chino shorts and polos, cords and button down oxfords)
SMC-San Diego
I am laughing at this remembering the time my high school age daughter solemnly thanked me for “not being one of those moms who shows up at school in yoga pants or short-shorts.” And when I pointed out that many of those moms looks great, she told me that was not the point. “There are teenage girl clothes and there are mom clothes and by the time you have a teenage daughter you shouldn’t be wearing teenage girls clothes.”
In fairness, she also had something to say about dads in backward baseball caps (along the lines of “that’s just stupid; shouldn’t they have outgrown that by now?”)
It was an interesting conversation.
NYCer
I don’t have these exact shorts , but I have several pairs of Nike running shorts and wear them frequently for actual running (I do not otherwise wear them as “normal” clothes though). I am 37 years old with children, so I hope adults are allowed to wear these shorts.
The Lone Ranger
I’m 60, I wear them to work out in but not as casual shorts just around. Not even just to lounge around in. They are clearly exercise clothing.
Ses
I’m a grown-ass woman and I love built-in underwear and unrestrictive shorts so you can catch me in these on the regular, in public, letting them gams get tans.
Lobbyist
I think the answer for those of us moms of teenagers (especially daughters — my son would not notice what I was wearing) is skorts. I have some workout skorts and even a couple longer ones. I feel like they are less revealing and therefore more appropriate for public consumption.
anon
Are people still buying these nike shorts? I have 2 pairs from about 10 years ago. They’ve held up well and I still wear them but I definitely don’t feel like they are fashionable or as flattering as other athletic shorts I have.
anon
I’m not! I used to wear these all the time. As I got into my late ’30s, they started feeling like tiny teenager shorts. I don’t know how else to describe it; the psychological discomfort is very real. I’m 5’8″ and these show a lot more leg than I’m comfortable with at this point in my life! I have much better luck with Adidas, Brooks, and Athleta.
Anonymous
For me it’s not even the length. I wear shorter shorts from LLL all the time. The cut of these is weirdly poofy right below the elastic waist. And see teenager comments above.
Anon
The cut is “teenager” because the poof looks just terrible on people with hips and thighs, and hips and thighs are usually inevitable with age. Weight sort of migrates there even if the rest of your body doesn’t change.
Anon
I just bought a new pair and am wearing the pairs I owned 10 years ago, so yes. They’re just for around the house and rowing, though. I don’t think the fit is as flattering as some others I own.
Anon
Exactly! 10 years ago, this is what ALL running shorts looked like. They were either Nike or something that looked at was cut similarly but a different brand. There are better options now, especially for those of us with more mature figures.
anonymous
I got a pair probably 12 years ago and I still wear mine regularly (I’m 33). They’ve held up remarkably well. Definitely not the most flattering, but I don’t really have a pair of athletic shorts that is flattering on me.
Anon
Yeah honestly, I don’t care if they’re unflattering. I spent $30-35 for shorts I wear all the time and I still have them in great shape 10 years later. That’s good enough for me.
Anon
They’re athletic shorts, who gives af if they’re fashionable?
Anon
I have similar ones for running (the target knock off). I wear them for that purpose, and occasionally if I’m dropping off my kid somewhere before going on my run, but don’t wear them otherwise. I wear denim and chambray shorts of similar length regularly though. I’m 35, a mom of 1 and slim. It did not occur to me that there’s any reason I shouldn’t be wearing them.
Alexis
Reposting from the earlier thread because I was a bit late –
Friday afternoon chats – how did you pick what you wanted to study in college and are you happy with your choice now? I feel like I have a lot of friends who now, 4 years out of college, are looking back and really re thinking some things.
ITLady
I started out going into a marketing degree plus intending to get a CS minor intending to go into technical sales. I liked computers a lot in high school but didn’t think I was “good enough” to do a full fledged CS degree. Got through my freshman CS classes and loved them (and ended up serving as a TA for them my junior year), changed majors a few times as I tweaked where I wanted to go, and then finally graduated with a bachelors in Information Technology with a minor in business.
I adore my job and my career – I started in IT infrastructure and ended up going into data and am now an architect. I also just kind of lucked out in doing a lot of introspection in high school and college about what my interests were and what I was good at.
Anonymous
I majored in something that was so d*mn cool. Like many liberal arts degrees, there was no clear career path (philosophy, same major as Stacy from What not to Wear), so I got to figure it out on the fly. And then keep re-figuring. Turns out, that if you are good at symbolic logic and very good at math, you can be a quant in finance. But that wasn’t planned out — I always read the WSJ (some in high school, definitely in college; it was our family paper but my mom is a teacher and my dad is a scientist, so no finance people but me).
It’s not linear the way accounting major –> CPA –> Big 4 is — I sort of envied that but for me it would have felt confining (that said, I wish I had had an accounting class b/c I need to care “when all events have passed for income to be accrued” sometimes).
Anonymous
And by so d*mn cool, I mean so d*mn cool to an undergrad in a black turtleneck and birkenstocks. Literally, too cool for school. Coolness among the black-turtleneck set is completely unrelated to employability but possibly related to being insufferable upon returning to the family for school breaks (sorry!).
Anon
I majored in physics. I’m honestly not sure why. I always did really well in math and science and loved biology in high school so I originally planned to major in that but decided not to for reasons that are still not entirely clear to me. I think it was some combination of not wanting to spend all my time in a lab and feeling that biology was too “easy” of a science (snobby, yes, but I come from a long line of physical scientists and engineers). In hindsight, I think computational biology would have been perfect for me, but it was just beginning to emerge as a field at that time and I didn’t really know about it. I’d always liked space and astronomy, and my school didn’t have an astronomy major so I picked physics thinking I would go onto to a PhD in astronomy/astrophysics. I haaaaated it. Most of the classes had nothing to do with astronomy (obviously) and they were very hard, and the combination of hard + something I had no interest in meant that I struggled academically and was completely miserable almost all the time. Lots of people suggested I change my major, including my parents (nicely) and my academic advisors (not so nicely) but I was too stubborn so I ended up getting the degree with a decent enough GPA but of course I was totally burned out and there was no way I was going on to grad school. I ended up going to law school to become a patent lawyer. I’m happy enough with my career, but part of me still feels regret and wonders if I would have stuck it out in science if I’d followed my original passion.
Anonymous
fellow physics major and patent attorney who also wished she picked something slightly more practical here.
Equestrian Attorney
I studied political science and English in undergrad and was going to be a journalist. Then I went to law school, thinking it would give me a backup if journalism failed (the year was 2010, and my journalism job prospects did not seem like the best). Fortunately I liked law and somehow ended up in corporate law/M&A, which is not at all what I thought I would do but did offer a more traditional career path. I really like my job most days, although I get the typical biglaw fatigue and the occasional “I wanted to save the world and now I help large corporations buy/sell to other large corporations” moral crisis. I still dream of quitting to write the Great American Novel or to run a B&B in Maine (possibly both), but don’t actually see that happening anytime soon.
Rachel
I majored in conservation and resource studies (kind of like ecology, but with more emphasis on managed landscapes) because I had an early love of nature and ecology. I now work for a large regional park district on the land acquisition side of things; I’ve also worked at a conservation non-profit and at a private environmental auditing company. Sometimes it amazes me that I actually managed to make a career in natural resources. I’ve started volunteering as a mentor and for career-day type events at my alma mater because I feel like I had to stumble along and figure things out as I went, and had no idea of the breadth of environmental careers available when I was in school. If you are considering graduate school, take time to figure out what you want to pursue. I worked for five years between undergraduate and my master’s program (in forestry) and it really helped me solidify what my professional interests are.
Anon
Wow you’re amazing!!! I’m super jealous!
NY CPA
I took a bunch of intro-level courses and didn’t get “stuck” with my initial choice. I applied to college putting international relations as my intended major. I ended up realizing I liked math a lot, so tried some math and econ courses, which I liked a lot better than IR when I found out IR involved huge weekly reading assignments (not my strength). Then, I took some intro level business courses to see if there was a more “applied” form of math/econ that I liked better than the true thing. I found out I loved accounting, but it was too late to switch majors, so I ended up majoring in econ, minoring in math, and took enough accounting classes to cover pre-requisites for accounting masters programs. It was also through taking a bunch of random classes that I found I love art history, and ended up taking all but 1 class required to get a minor in art history–just because!
Anon
I picked math because I was pre-dental and I loved calculus I. I was supposed to stop after that and move on to different science courses but I wanted to see what happened in Calculus II. And then Differential Equations. And then Number Theory. So my nerdy interests kind of chose it for me. No regrets.
Anon
Funny there are so many math responses. I started as an engineer major bc I thought I liked math and science, and a lot of people in my family were engineers. It turned out I was terrrrrible at post HS science, so I became a math major bc that was what I actually enjoyed.
I will say at the time I felt like there wasn’t much you could do with a math major…I feel like the few resources we had in the career dept for a math major back then were basically saying I could be an actuary or a teacher. Now that I’m an adult with hindsight I realize how silly limiting that was. I personally ended up in finance, but I feel like I could have taken it in a lot of different directions.
Anon
My father had always said that I should major in whatever I wanted for a bachelor’s degree because it was the master’s degree that mattered to a career. So I did –I chose the subject I enjoyed the most, which was also where I got the highest grades and found the easiest. I ended up as an accountant, though, with no master’s degree, mostly self-taught and with awesome CPA mentors.
Of course, when I told him what I had chosen, he immediately said, “What? What are you going to do with THAT? Can’t you change your major?”
Dahlia
I studied politics in undergrad because I liked social studies in high school and was good at it, and I was good at writing and liked reading. I had vague ideas of working in international relations or development or maybe law one day. I grew up in a blue collar town in Northern Canada and had far more exposure to the trades than to any professional jobs, so I wasn’t really sure what options were out there (although there was a strong family expectation to go to college)
After a while I realized I really enjoy working with my hands, love having an instant pay-off for my work (don’t we all?), and had a lovely uncle judge who recommended against law for me. I became a surgeon and am happy with that decision overall, and feel gratified by my work, although sometimes I yearn for a career with less stress and shorter hours.
real humans
Spurred by the comment above about the teenage daughter saying that there’s just certain clothes “for moms”, how old were you when you realized that your parents or siblings are real humans vs. just “mom” or “brother”? I grew up in a religious, conservative household, so I always just thought that my parents were parents. I knew my dad was also a licensed professional, but it didn’t occur to me that his job was also part of his identity. Same with him being my mom’s husband. He just existed in relation to me, as “dad”. When I was about 14 years old, my maternal grandfather passed away and my mom was in terrible shape and I was being a bratty teenager. And for the first time in my whole life, my dad cursed. It was the most shocking thing ever to me, and I realized in that moment that he had this whole life and feelings that had nothing to do with me. He was a whole human, not just “dad”!
My brother made a comment to me in high school at one point, literally saying, “Um. You’re like, a real person. You tell jokes and people laugh and boys flirt with you and you have friends.” In total shock that I wasn’t just his sister. I’d brought boyfriends and friends to the house and I joked at the dinner table, but it had just never dawned on him that I’m a whole real person outside of his sister.
I feel like this is the same with teachers if you run into them outside of the classroom. Like yes, it makes perfect sense that you need toilet paper in your house but I guess I just didn’t assume that you do anything outside of teaching me in school!?! And now I have some friends who are teachers and I’m like, “WAIT. Were my teachers whole humans just like these people!?!”
Anyways, IDK if that makes sense, but sometimes I think about how weird it must be to become a parent or teacher and suddenly have this person think that you’re just this single aspect of yourself.
Ellen
I think youre a much deeper thinker then I am but yes, I always knew that teachers needed things the same way the rest of us do, and I actually ran into Mr. Brown at the Whole Foods a number of years ago and yes, he was buying toilet paper there! And it was not inexpensive either, but I think at his age that he needs soft fluffy TP b/c he walks a little like Dad and he has hemoroids.
Anonie
I see what you mean! I’m 29 and sometimes still get the sense that my dad does not recognize me as a fully functioning independent human with her own motivations and spheres of influence. Granted, my relationship with my dad is complicated in general, but I can certainly relate.
Anon
Has anyone gotten their eyebrows microbladed in the Richmond or Northern Virginia areas? Where did you go? Experiences?
anon
Anti-recommendation: I know a couple of people who have gone to Beauty & the Blade in NoVa whose brows do not look good. B&tB has a lovely Instagram feed but IRL results are not so great (weird shaping, odd colors, very fake looking).
Anon
How has your industry changed over the years? I work in a blue-collar industry. I am really impressed with the changes I have seen over the last 15 years. When I entered this field, there were no female field staff at all. Now, about 5% are – which sounds so small but it’s such a huge change seeing a few female names on staff roster versus zero. When I started, time off work the guys took for birth of a child was a few days or a max a week. We had a seven babies born last year on the team and every single man took two weeks PTO + the company 2 week parental leave. I am so proud of them.
Anon
1) At a Big 4 accounting firm in audit, I’d say the biggest change–definitely for the worse–is the shifting of work to offshore service centers (India, etc.) as a cost cutting measure. It was happening before 5 years ago, but the last 5 years have seen a huge amount of acceleration. All the work that used to be done by US entry-level staff, and was how they learned how to audit, is now done by those teams, which means we are setting up our new hires to fail. They aren’t learning the basics so have poor knowledge and understanding of how auditing works. I’ve seen this deterioration in staff-level personnel on every team I’ve been on over the last several years.
2) A huge push towards implementing more advanced technology, especially data analytics. Some of it is interesting and helpful, and some of it is not, but we have to tick the box to say we did it.
3) Going along with the tick-the-box theme, a push towards standardization of the audit (i.e. for low risk, straightforward areas, here’s the step-by-step list of things you should be doing and templates to document in, and don’t add anything not on the list).
anon
What is the women’s equivalent of the golf shirt? I have noticed over the years that men are wearing golf shirts as business casual instead of a dress shirt. This has increased with COVID in my industry (consulting, conservative male environ). I am wondering if there’s a ladies version I can throw on every day during COVID WFH times.
Anonymous
I would say one of the sleeveless shells from Loft or Banana Republic. Sometimes mixed media, sometimes with pattern or some cut out trim, but loose fitting, flowy, casual but not loungewear.
Anon
Oh good, the shirt tr011 is back.
Anonymous
Ralph Lauren or Lacoste classic polo shirts.
Anonymous
Weird question, but does anyone have itchy earlobes? My derm gave me a shampoo but I don’t often use it b/c my hair prefers others. I’ve been putting Cerave on them often, just started washing them separately with Cerave cleanser tho maybe I should use the shampoo.
Anon
Cerave irritates my skin. My doctor said cetearyl alcohol or stearyl alcohols generally were probably the culprit (these are also common ingredients in shampoos).
Anon
Do you wear earrings? Stay away from nickel or even silver. A lot of people with sensitive skin respond better to gold or white gold.
Anonymous
Skip wearing earrings for a few weeks. A mild allergy to metals is common. Are you wearing over the ear headphones? Too much time can sometimes irritate my ears, too. Also think about hair products and whether anything has changed.
Metallica
Hello Hive, long time no post. I have a question for all you hard-driving professional ladies out there (so…all of us.) Lately it feels like my husband and I are both entrants in the Slog Olympics. We had our second a few months ago so we’re certainly sleep-deprived, but we are trying to get back in the swing of things and it feels like we can’t relax or have fun. Both he and I are either working or small-child-rearing at all times, but when the kids go to bed we just resume working, even though neither of us have to. Our dynamic as a couple is good. For my part, I feel guilty now whenever I do anything not “required” of me or that furthers my family in any way, but realistically I know that this is an express ticket to Burnoutland.
Any advice on how to carve out time for myself/us and not feel guilty about it? This is ridiculous, but I’m in my early forties and I still feel like I need permission to enjoy myself. I want to not feel that way. When I do try to take some time, I find myself wondering how much time is “ok” to take for myself.
Anon
I think this is just the reality of pandemic parenting. I don’t know any moms (or dads, really) who are enjoying themselves at all these days. Even those of us who are lucky enough to have childcare are just scrambling to catch up at work in anticipation of losing childcare again soon. I’m definitely not trying to minimize the situation – it really, really s*cks – but I don’t think it’s unique to you.
Metallica
Sorry, I should have specified—I can’t enjoy myself or relax in the downtime I *do* have—it’s certainly less now than the Before Times. I’m looking for any ideas on how to not feel guilty about it.
Anonymous
I went to a professional bra fitting today (masked!). I’ve worn a 34B or 32C from target/dept. stores. Much to my shock, the fitter put me in a 30G. The bras she gave me fit – I bought two – but am trying to reconcile this. In my head a G is like, what you see on exotic dancers. My body double is more like Reese Witherspoon not Marilyn Monroe. Has anyone figured out bra sizing, for real??
Anon
I had a similar experience last year. I was wearing 32C and the fitter put me in 34DD. It was life changing.
Anonymous
Basically, bra sizing is sort of fungible. You can get yourself to a really big cup letter by making the band size tiny, and vice versa. Of course I don’t know what you look like, but most people would laugh if you described Reese Witherspoon as a G cup.
Anon
Same experience. The smaller band size + larger cup size was life changing for me. I have to special order my bras now, but they provide better support than any sports bra ever has and are more comfortable than the bras I used to wear.
Anon
You wear the same size as my daughter. She resisted the bigger cup size because it sounds so va-voomy, but her tiny back and rib cage means that the smaller band is necessary or the back rides up. The fit is so much better.
Anon
The G cup on a 30 band is a lot smaller than the G cup on a 38 band. The cup sizes are scaled to the band size. I don’t know if you’re talking about US or UK cup sizes but you can look at “sister sizes” for bras
https://blog.thirdlove.com/sister-sizes-the-bra-secret-every-woman-should-know/
I have learned a lot about how a bra should really fit from redd1t abrathatfits. My properly fitting bras
– tack at the gore (meaning the wires between the cup at on my chest and not floating)
– support the bottoms of my breast in the cup, rather than folding my breast tissue on itself
– separate the breasts rather than pushing them together
– do not cause breast tissue to spill out the tops or sides of cups.
The best thing about wearing a bra that fits is not wanting to claw it off all day.
Anon
PSA ladies new to the DC area: Here is some helpful info about leash laws in Arlington VA: https://parks.arlingtonva.us/local-leash-laws/.
Some dog parks in the area: https://parks.arlingtonva.us/parksfacilities/dog-parks/
Thanks!
Anon
This is so strange. Do you think your local misbehaving dog owners are all readers here?
Flats Only
This is so strange. Do you think your local misbehaving dog owners are all readers here?
Anon
PSA: Dermstore has 20% off with code CELEBRATE. Although many popular products are exempt, it works on Juice beauty and Smashbox.