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I was at a small dinner with some women a few months ago, and we went around the table and introduced ourselves, including explanations of where we find our inspiration and where we find our quiet.
The second question has stuck with me, and I thought it might be an interesting discussion here today: Where DO you find your quiet? Do you strive to make mental quiet time a part of every day, or do you add it in as needed? Do you do something specific like meditate, or something meditation-adjacent like using coloring books or baking or knitting silently (no TV or podcast on!), or going for a run without entertainment?
I've read a lot about how this mental quiet time is increasingly difficult to come across naturally. As someone who tends to joke that I have 80 tabs open in my head at all times, this is particularly true. I've read about business leaders who purposely keep some time unscheduled, and obviously we've heard a lot about the benefits of meditation, limiting screen time, social media breaks, and more.
My own answer at the time no longer really applies — my older son was having trouble falling asleep back then, so I would help him by syncing my breathing with his. Lying there in the dark, silent except for our breaths, was a reverent, quiet time for both of us.
But (happily) he grew out of it and didn't need as much help anymore, and my younger son hasn't had that particular problem in a while either, so I’ve had to find my own quiet time these days. It's something I need to remind myself constantly to do — I'll be good about it for six months or so and then I just kind of forget.
But I do notice a huge difference when I'm not making the effort, like the tabs in my head aren't only open but flickering and doing some crazy “time for a new computer” kind of thing, like opening and closing all at once. I have a fashion coloring book I may try to get into, or else I'll try to get back to my attempts at meditation.
Here are some easy kits and books to get you started on cross-stitch for stress relief…
Readers, how about you — do you strive for quiet time in your life? Where do you find it? For those of you who have been seeking it for a while, what different tactics have you tried over the years?
Stock photo via Stencil.
nylon girl
Reading time in “my room” after the kids are in bed. I redid our front room to how I wanted it–nice Ethan Allen furniture in bright happy colors.
Anon
Swimming. I was a competitive swimmer growing up and in college and it is really the thing that makes me happiest. But I haven’t had very much time for it lately and that’s showing up in my overall mental health :(
Kara
Same! I didn’t get a job I was at the late interview stages of and really wanted, and it somehow put me into a whole funk about having to continue job searching. I think finally going swimming this morning when I woke up anxious helped pull me out of it
Veronica Mars
Watercolor painting in my Bible. It’s a whole thing–I have to gesso the page, and then dry it, and then watercolor it, and then dry as I go, but it’s incredibly relaxing and meaningful.
Go for it
You are awesome !!
Webby
Any recommendations for a rectangle body type fashion bloggers? I need some casual outfit ideas that will work for my body type.
Anonymous
There is a blogger/vlogger with a rectangle shape, Marie-Anne Lecoeur at How to be chic and elegant dot com, a French woman. She speaks to all body types though she is always discussing her wardrobe and shape too.
Anonymous
Yoga – honestly couldn’t survive without it
Jackalope
+1 – the ultimate “quiet time” for me is a long savasana where the instructor is not talking but has not yet left the room, so it is still mostly quiet without people leaving.
Go for it
Hot yoga and walking/hiking in nature are my joy places.
GCinFlats
The local state parks and national parks when I can get to them. Hiking and bird watching. I would have lost my mind long ago and run screaming from law without these places. That’s where I’m really alive, the office is not my authentic self place (but dammit, this is the life and career I dug deeper into so here I am).
Vicky Austin
In the bathtub on Sunday nights with a book, most of the time.
Anon
Driving for hours. I have family that lives a few hours away so it’s an easy excuse to pack up and drive for a long time. I always start off with podcasts and music but eventually I get tired of fussing with it and have an hour or two of complete silence.
anon
Wherever I can be in nature, whether it’s kayaking on a lake or hiking. Gardening works, too.
anon
I MEAN ACTUAL GARDENING WITH PLANTS.
Senior Attorney
*snort*
Anonymous
Gardening* does work too!
Small Firm IP Litigator
Being active – running, swimming, surfing, cycling, hitting the gym, snowboarding. Going to the beach or pool to lounge/read. Going out for ice cream or shave ice. Vegging with my husband.
Jessica Perlick
Taking my dog for a walk early in the morning, late in the evening, or both times when I can fit it in. I make a point not to wear headphones, and I just enjoy the walking paths around our house.
Otherwise, I am a big fan of reading out on my back patio, or coloring. Although it somewhat undermines the idea of “quiet,” I love putting on a favorite movie or show I’ve seen a hundred times (original recipe Law & Order works well for this) as background noise while I color or read.
Anon for this
I’ve realized I don’t necessarily have a lot of quiet, even though I live on my own. I’m almost always listening to music or podcasts or reading or have the TV on. So even if I’m in the bath or relaxing or working out, there’s always some background noise.
Is this common for other people?
Vicky Austin
Yes, but I’m trying to do it less.
mascot
Yes, I listen to music a lot and always have. White noise also works when music isn’t appropriate. It helps drown out a lot of background distractions and keeps me in the task/moment. I can’t get to the same place with talking from a tv or podcast. I don’t interpret quiet as a complete lack of noise. To me, quiet means making the space in my head for my thoughts to process.
Denise frantz
Reading I Love to Read its very relaxing for me and gives me peace❤❤