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Our daily workwear reports suggest one piece of work-appropriate attire in a range of prices. This wrap-front sparkle dress is affordable and festive, but also feels like the classy side of festive — it isn't too much of anything. Heavily-sequined things are everywhere this season, for example, but I always worry about sitting on someone's couch or dinner chairs and snagging the fabric… velvet jumpsuits are very in right now but I worry they would be a walking lint trap… whereas this dress looks like something that's easy to throw on, sophisticated, and versatile — you can wear it on date nights well into spring. It's $83-$134 at Nordstrom (the option in regular sizes just went on sale!). Wrap-Front Sparkle Dress This post contains affiliate links and Corporette® may earn commissions for purchases made through links in this post. For more details see here. Thank you so much for your support! Seen a great piece you’d like to recommend? Please e-mail tps@corporette.com.See More Recent Picks from Corporette®:
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Some of our latest posts here at Corporette…
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And some of our latest threadjacks here at Corporette (reader questions and commentary) — see more here!
Some of our latest threadjacks include:
- What to say to friends and family who threaten to not vote?
- What boots do you expect to wear this fall and winter?
- What beauty treatments do you do on a regular basis to look polished?
- Can I skip the annual family event my workplace holds, even if I'm a manager?
- What small steps can I take today to get myself a little more “together” and not feel so frazzled all of the time?
- The oldest daughter is America's social safety net — change my mind…
- What have you lost your taste for as you've aged?
- Tell me about your favorite adventure travels…
Ellen
Yay! Open Thread’s! I love Open thread’s and the the sparkle on the wrap front dress. I am going tomorrow to Weschester so I can stop at Nordstrom’s when I see Rosa!
Does anyone in the HIVE know anything about ANNUITIES? A guy I met last night at Michael Jordon’s was telling me to invest in them, but I dare not talk to Dad unless I am smart on this issue! HELP! I think this guy is going to call again and I want to appear to know something.
Anonymous
Why is the plus size version a normal, appropriate length and the straight size version so short? I wear a straight size, but I do not need/want to show that much leg!
Anon
And the straight size version seems so much tighter.
Anon
Apparently if you’ve got it, you’re supposed to flaunt it.
Said by someone who would wear the plus size version.
Anonymous
I really like seeing both versions together, and I also like the recent trend of showing the same item in several sizes (e.g., XS, M, XL). The exact same item can look very different even in XS and M, and I appreciate having the option to see items on a body that at least approximates my own.
ko
I was JUST clicking through to make the same comment. I wear regular size and it drives me nuts. I hate showing knees & wish retailers would give us the same option for appropriate length. Ugh.
EB
Does anyone have a pearl ring that they love? I want to ask for one for christmas from my husband and would love a recommendation if anyone has one on their wishlist! I like rings on the bigger side (not dainty) and would pay up to $2k.
NOLA
If I were looking for a larger pearl ring, I’d look at Novica, but they’re waaaay below the price range you’re talking about. I just love that floral Balinese style. I wear a peachy pink pearl ring every day and I love it (designed by Tom Mathis at Symmetry Jewelers https://www.symmetryjewelers.com/) It’s much more dainty than what you’re looking for, but his designs are gorgeous and he does custom.
Anon
I am not a jeweler and haven’t shopped jewelry in a good long while but $2k seems a bit high for a pearl ring. Pearls themselves aren’t terribly expensive. Perhaps if it’s a brand name or has diamond accents, that would make sense. This opinion is totally subject to correction by others, though!
EB
I would love it if it had diamond accents! And I would happily pay less – that is just my upper ceiling! Appreciate the thoughts on pricing!
S
Check out 1stdibs if you have that kind of budget. I’m jealous!
Anonymous
Just a word of warning – you need to be oh so careful with pearl rings. Washing your hands, putting on lotion, etc. impacts it so much more than a gemstone. I had a beautiful pearl ring that I inherited and I had to stop wearing it because of the damage. I love the look, but I would probably spend well less than your budget and possibly even consider costume.
Equestrian Attorney
So I got a pearl engagement ring (I don’t do big diamonds, like pearls, and we were on a budget). Everyone said this as if it was the end of the world. I’ve had it for three and a half years, wear it everywhere, including when washing hands, showering, etc , and it looks the same as when I bought it. It probably won’t last my whole life and I’m fine with that, but so far this has not been a major issue.
DH got mine on Etsy from a shop based in Israel – can’t remember what it’s called but I really love it and it was custom made and there was a large choice of designs. It has two tiny diamonds on each side of the pearl.
Ms B
Try Pearl Paradise; many lovely choices for less than half of your max.
Anon
I love the pearl rings at Kojima pearl and they are mostly well under your budget. I don’t have one but it’s a goal.
Mallory
I have a ring from Na Hoku that was gifted to me that I really like – not all their designs are my style, but they do have some lovely pearl pieces.
Anonymous
I’m surprised nobody has mentioned Mikimoto. For example: https://www.mikimotoamerica.com/categories/rings/bubbles-ring
Ms B
Mikimoto is beautiful, but pricey. Unless I was shopping for an heirloom quality strand or money was not an object, I would go elsewhere . . .
Sydney
I have a David Yurman pearl ring. Surrounded by little diamonds and braided band. I think it was less than $1k. I love it.
Birthdays when you're old
How do you celebrate your birthdays once you’re older? Are “bar nights” a thing for non-major birthdays? I’ve been so busy with kids for the past few years but now I’m thinking it would be nice to see a lot of acquaintances and other people for an easy birthday — but not sure if that’s something 44 year olds do regularly.
NOLA
I’ve done movie and dinner with a few girlfriends or we all meet to go to an arts fair that’s always on a weekend closest to my birthday and one of my good friends. Pretty low-key. When my birthday is on a weeknight, sometimes it’s nothing.
January
I’d say go for it! But it may depend on whether people in your circle won’t come because they’d need a babysitter.
Anon
I celebrate with travel – I’ve done it solo, with husband and kids, and with girlfriends. I’m not much for bars, but I’m not sure that’s an age thing so much as just a me thing – I would go out in my 20s because literally everybody did, but I was happier once more people started wanting to stay in.
Anon
I’m 35 and a friend had a bday recently and did a bar night and I absolutely did not make it. A bar? On a Wednesday? At 7:30? I’m in yoga pants by then. I love the idea of going to a festival together.
Anon
You are my spirit animal.
DCR
I don’t think there is anything wrong with doing a bar night. I’m in my mid-30s, and lots of friends still have bar nights on a weekend close to their birthday. But I would consider whether your friends would have to hire babysitters and whether that is something that they would be willing to do. If not, you may want to reconsider
Anonymous
Group trip to Vegas once a year and we celebrate all the birthdays at once with a big dinner at an upper echelon restaurant there. Joel Robuchon, Jose Andres, Bouchon, or Giada for example…takes all the pressure off of trying to make it and coordinate with kids/ sports/ etc…plus you can fully commit which is nice.
Anon
OMG I would so much rather do a bunch of casual bar nights than some giant trip.
Anonymous
I am single and 44 and I would definitely come to a bar night. I would not dance on the bar, drink multiple shots, or make out with a stranger, but I will absolutely still go to a bar with friends. In fact, next week I am getting together with several women, ranging from 40-60, for a happy hour/dinner at a bar. No one blinked at the suggestion. The ones with kids are leaving them with their husbands. Most of us don’t have that problem — single or older kids. Go for it if that is what you want to do.
Duckles
+1
Please give people NOTICE through, even for something casual– yesterday a friend asked if we wanted to join her for dinner for her bday this Saturday and I felt bad but almost everyone was already scheduled then.
CountC
Late 30s here – for my last birthday, I had my close friends over for a casual dinner party/game night. I had it catered, bought wine and beer, and gave everyone a LOT of notice so that they could get baby sitters. We had a lot of fun!
I am not much for bars these days, so that idea didn’t appeal to me. in my friend group, it’s usually brunch or dinners for birthdays.
Anon
Close friends just did a bar night on a Saturday night for the husband’s 41st bday. My DH (46) went and I (42) stayed home with the kids bc we didn’t have enough notice to get a babysitter. And it’s DH’s friends more than mine. So, yeah, 40-somethings go out for drinks for bdays. We are in Manhattan, if that makes a difference.
Turtle Wexler
I’ve been out of the dating game for awhile and am just starting to get back into it, so here’s a question for your Friday afternoon: when do you go to bed with a new partner for the first time? Is there such a thing as doing it too soon (or waiting too long?) Do you look for specific conversations or milestones first? Do you distinguish between the traditional act and various things you can do leading up to it when deciding how long to wait? Is the timeline for this different than the timeline for the first sleeping over at each other’s place?
January
This subject came up on a weekend thread not too long ago – maybe in September? Search “demis*xual” in the comments.
anon
Great username. That was one of my favorite books as a kid!
It really varies for me. I often feel like I should (and therefore usually do) by the third to fifth date, and if I don’t, it starts to become a “thing,” even if the guy is nice, like I’m just worrying about why we haven’t done it and he might be worrying about it and sometimes I honestly just want to get it over with! But in retrospect, that might be too soon. I have done it and then been frustrated with myself by how little I knew about the guy besides the fact that he seems like a nice person and I’m attracted to him.
Once I invite him up or vice versa, it’s pretty much a matter of time. I always think I would like to date in a more old-fashioned way and just have the dates be about getting to know each other slowly, but I haven’t done it.
I have definitely done sleepovers without s e x, as well as s e x without sleepovers. Sleepovers feel way more intimate to me than s e x.
I am always candid with guys about wanting to be monogamous and practice safe s e x. They usually seem relieved that I brought it up first.
Mineallmine
Yeah, I’m like you anon. It just takes me a while to warm up to someone. I wish sometimes I could be more instant attraction like some of the other posters because I do think modern dating is set up to expect early gardening. Obviously if it’s someone I know well already it’s feels much more comfortable to jump into bed.
Shopaholic
FWIW, I think it’s all highly specific to each person/situation and comfort levels. BUT I think the timeline for the first LGP is different from sleeping over. Maybe it’s because I’m used to be single and alone but I can virtually never sleep when someone new is in my bed and I’m just not as comfortable with that happening early on while dating.
Anon for this
TBH usually first date. These have led to relationships about 50% of the time, and represent maybe 5% of my first dates. BUT ymmv because I’m generally pretty decisive, enjoy doing this, and have no regrets about the 50% that ended after that one time. If I don’t want to do it with the person an hour into the date, I end the date and don’t see them again. Also, compatibility in that sense is extremely important to me – if it’s only mediocre I’m not going to pursue it further even if I otherwise like the person. My approach seems to be unusual.
How Long
I think that this is totally dependent on the couple. I slept with my boyfriend after less than a week, on the third date. I enjoy those activities and wanted to have fun after my divorce, so I have not adhered to any timelines that people advocate for. I don’t think it’s harmed my chances at a relationship with anyone I was interested in having a relationship with.
For me, this timeline is MUCH different from actual sleepovers. Until my boyfriend, I only had sleepovers with 2 guys (one night each) because actually sleeping in the same bed just never felt right. And I broke up with both a couple days after the sleepovers because I realized we just weren’t right for each other after that point. With this guy, I love sleeping next to him, so we’ve spent many more nights together than apart.
Hmmm...
I slept with my bf on the first date…three years ago. We went engagement ring shopping last month. All of that is to say, do what feels right for you. There’s no right or wrong answer.
Anonymous
When I feel like it. I don’t waste any time thinking of anything else.
Is it Friday yet?
+1 when it feels right. Sometimes that’s the first date, sometimes it’s the fifth.
Anonymous
I also do it when I feel like it. I had it with my husband on our first date. I really don’t think the timeline has ever impacted the relationship much, either by waiting or not waiting.
Anon
Looking for the unicorn cutting board — large enough to have space to chop a lot of stuff but not so large you can’t put it away easily in drawers; dishwasher safe; and most of all LONG LASTING and will not warp over time. My current ones are all wobbly on the counter after a few years of use and it feels a bit hazardous. Any recommendations?
pugsnbourbon
I got a heavy duty one at IKEA – unfortunately I can’t remember what it’s called or how expensive it was. It’s just over an inch thick and is about 9″x13″. So maybe too large for a drawer but it fits into my lower cabinets just fine.
Anonymous
I got a heavy duty one at IKEA – unfortunately I can’t remember what it’s called or how expensive it was. It’s just over an inch thick and is about 9″x13″. So maybe too large for a drawer but it fits into my lower cabinets just fine.
lawsuited
+1 to Epicurean chopping boards. The 3 black ones I have have been used daily, are always washed in the dishwasher and still look great after 4 years. They’re not quite as deep black as they once were but have no warping or staining and only very minimal scuff marks from our very sharp knives.
BB
Have you tried the Epicurean boards? They are supposed to be dishwasher safe, although I didn’t have mine long enough to really test if they would warp. I liked their size and lightweight feel, but I found them to be super loud when the knife hit the board. You may not have the same issue though, as I know lots of people love them.
AFT
I’ve had my oldest Epicurean for ~10 years and while the surface has lots of small cuts on it, it’s otherwise held up perfect. We now own ~4.
Anonymous
I’m sad you aren’t actually shopping for a cutting board shaped like a unicorn ;)
Unstable relationships
One of my friends is going through a breakup after about 2 years. I really dislike the guy and there were bright red flags from day one. Now he’s going back and forth about what he wants and its bringing her down. She has a history of ignoring warning signs (I think she sees it as some sort of challenge) and I’m worried that we’re in our late 20s and she still hasnt learned anything/the guys get worse.
For those of you who were stuck in a cycle of unstable relationships, what got you out of it?
Anon
Therapy. Still a work in progress, tbh.
Sassyfras
Getting out of this cycle takes some level of self-awareness and the willingness to reflect on why she is attracted to these guys in the first place. Therapy is a good start.
anon
Therapy. She has see the patterns and recognize the “whys” before she can change anything. Sometimes those patterns are difficult to recognize. The same underlying issue can manifest itself in different ways in each relationship so it’s difficult to see the true pattern. An easy example is some how winding up in relationships that don’t work out because the guy always moves out of town or doesn’t live near by in the first place, or there’s some other logistical barrier to a long-term relationship. Dumb luck? Or do you have a tendency to go for guys who are unavailable? If so, why? Does the fact that the relationship is not likely to go anywhere even though you really like each other some how appealing, or make you feel safer and more comfortable being yourself? What does unavailable look like? How can we identify and resolve the underlying issues so that you are not drawn to unavailable men? That’s an easy example from my life– took therapy to get to that understanding (and many other understandings). It’s often not as simple as saying she “hasn’t learned anything” — you sound kinda judgmental honestly.
Unstable relationships OP
I dont mean to sound judgemental. The reason I say ‘she hasnt learned anything” is because shes been dating the same type of guy for the past decade we have long conversations about issues over and over again – similar to what you described: people who dont want to commit, dont live nearby, still hung up about an ex. She eventually concludes that “no relationship is perfect’ and ultimately gets dumped then jumps to the next person. She doesnt really “believe” in therapy so I stopped suggesting it.
lts just hard to see a friend make decisions like this so I was curious how other people got out of it.
Anon
I stopped listening to people. The dating “advice” given to me was actively harmful – and even adults did this. People just get uncomfortable with someone who can’t find the right person and say dumb things forcefully.
A sample:
*getting all pouty-face when I finally ended relationships that literally had me in tears every day
*telling me my expectations were too high. (Expectations: be treated like an actual person and not a piece of meat.)
*did I mention the pouty face when things didn’t work out?
*telling me to stop meeting men in bars. (I was like, you mean my classmates in my elite university?)
Some of the rare advice that did not suck:
*If it’s this bad now (early on), it will only get worse.
*I am a good daughter, sister, and friend. If a man isn’t treating me the way my friends and family treat me, he’s not the right person for me.
Unstable relationships OP
Wow that is really sh**ty advice, I’m sorry people said those things to you…
In the rare times I do give advice – I try to place emphasis on the fact that she doesnt deserve this and her feelings of being disrespected are valid/not to brush them off – instead of ‘you can do better’ or something accusatory if that make sense?
Anon
That makes a lot of sense. The accusatory language only reinforces the idea that the woman is wrong for leaving.
There are a lot of people who smugly declare that if men treat you badly, it must because you secretly deserve it, or you just aren’t quite good enough to land a man who will adore you.
Again, what I found to be actually helpful was the emphasis on how other people – family, friends (men and women), bosses, co-workers, team members, whomever – treat me well and respect me as a person. It helped me to see the crappy boyfriends as the anomaly and therefore the problem.
Anon
How, when, and where did you decide to buy your first house? We live in a NE city suburb and can only afford housing further from the city than we currently live. I don’t mind moving a bit further out but i currently work in Big Law in the city and have short commute that compensates a bit for my long hours. My husband works in the opposite direction of the city so we’d be shortening his commute. We don’t have kids, but we will try in another year or so. I can’t tell if that’s too soon to hit the suburbs! Housing prices continue to rise so the push is to get in while we can. Appreciate any thoughts!
Marshmallow
You are totally me except that H works farther into the city than I do, so moving into the suburbs lengthens both our commutes. Deciding this now as well. We have our first on the way and decided to wait on buying after going through a house-hunting process earlier this year. We current rent in a very desirable location with a short commute, and opted to stay here for another 1.5 years so we can enjoy the short commute and walkable neighborhood while adjusting to the baby phase.
It’s actually my perception that real estate prices are softening a bit, although I’m worried about interest rates going up more by the time we buy in a year or two. But our decision was also influenced by our landlord’s offer to extend our lease, which I think is already below-market, with no rental increase, and the fact that we LOVE our current home. We’re able to save an extra $1000 or so per month toward our down payment by keeping our rent low, and we’re happy here, so for us the trade-off is worth it.
Anonymous
We bought in the inner burbs of Boston at 27.
We aren’t city mice. We like home improvement projects. We knew we’d be in the area +/- 5 years. We picked somewhere where we could still commute to the city, go in for dinner/drinks and still start a family night/when/as the time came.
bookie ; )
need a hive recommendation: I am looking for a bookbinder/notebook maker recommendation. I’d prefer one that someone has worked with, I do like supporting small companies but not against larger firms. Must be able to know my printed item is not going to be used without permission (do I need to copyright?)
MANY THANKS!
Financial Advisor Search
Wise ladies, how do I find a financial advisor who is not affiliated with some major institution? We need general strategy advice (i.e. husband doesn’t see the point of contributing to 401k and I don’t know enough to argue with him), but don’t have a ton of money to invest. Who can help with that and how do I find them?
Anon
Post your situation and a question asking if 401K makes sense for you on http://www.bogleheads.org. Be specific about your incomes and state your husband’s point of view as well. People there are extremely knowledgeable and helpful. You will get enough advice to start out (or not to start out) without paying for an advisor.
Anonymous
I think this is territory for a book. Suze Orman’s intro books and “Get a Financial Life” are good starters. The financial advisors I have come across have mostly been interested in selling me insurance. I know there are fee-only advisors, but I think you could really wait for that given the info you’ve provided.
Anon
I think a basic book is a great starting place in this case. A very competent/ high-level CPA might also be able to help. If you’re stuck on how to invest the 401(k), then you may need a bit of help from a professional investment advisor. I’m a member of USAA and used their advisors to choose among the various options that I was given. Not sure how else to address that conundrum of needing a tiny bit of help. Once you’re ready to make some bigger plans about general investment strategies, I’d look for a “fee-only” advisor. He or she will likely be willing to provide limited advice for a flat amount or to manage your assets in an ongoing manner. Generally, to be clear, “fee only” means that they charge a flat percentage of the assets they manage versus getting paid commission on the investments they sell. However, they also often offer services on an hourly basis or as a set amount to assess a certain situation.
Anon
Advice/ideas requested: my husband passed away earlier this year at age 30…I decided at the time to no longer wear my wedding ring, thinking that since he isn’t able to wear his, I won’t as well. But this doesn’t seem right either…any suggestions for a ring that isn’t wedding/engagement style, but would be appropriate for something like my situation?
Anon
I’m so sorry for your loss. That is so, so sad.
Wear whatever ring you like. If you’d like to not wear your wedding ring that is ok. My mom wore hers on a chain around her neck (Inside her clothing) for years.
If you want a ring to wear to commemorate him, perhaps a ring with his birthstone? Or whatever ring you like with something meaningful engraved inside the band?
I lost a child to cancer when she was age three and I often wear a ring I had made with her birthstone. I don’t wear it every day. I did for a while, and it can become kind of an obsessive thing, like if i don’t wear the ring I’m not honoring her memory – but time and therapy taught me that whatever I do to remember her, she is always in my heart and always will be.
Hugs to you.
Anononymous
Hugs to both of you. I’m so, so sorry for your losses.
Anon
I’m so sorry for your loss. What about wearing your rings on your other hand? Or having them melted down and remade into a pendant?
Anon
Widows and widowers may wear their rings for as long as they like. It’s entirely appropriate to wear a wedding ring after death.
Anonymous
this is totally dependent on how you feel- don’t feel any pressure to make a decision right away either and things can change over time. For what its worth, my close friend who lost her husband very suddenly at the age of 29 wore her rings for a few months, and then got a tattoo on her ring finger. Not for everyone of course but she is happy with the decision. another option is etsy- maybe a ring with a name or a date?
Anonymous
Hugs to you. I lost my husband almost 5 years ago at a similar age, and I so feel for you. Everyone’s grief timeline is their own and there are no wrong answers.
I wore my wedding ring for about a year afterwards and then stored all of them (his wedding ring, my wedding & engagement rings) for my daughter to have when she grows up. I had a separate custom ring made that I don’t wear on my ring finger.
May I also suggest the young widow boards at widda.org as a helpful community? Even though I didn’t participate until much later, it really helped to know that there were people in the same boat (the club none of us wanted to join).
Sending such big hugs to you.
Anonymous
What size of holiday bonus do you all pay a nanny who’s been with your family for 5-6 months FT?
Anonymous
One week salary. For us that’s…a lot.
DC zoo restaurant
Is there an affordable lunch/brunch place near the zoo in DC? All I can recall is a Starbucks across the street…
Anonymous
Open City a few blocks down. There’s also a chipotle, Italian restaurant, etc.
Anon
Duke’s Counter is pretty good and OpenCity a few blocks down is great! They’re probably average DC prices. Making me nostalgic…I’m not in DC anymore but I used to live right there!
Hollis
Is there a point at which a very senior person cannot fly? My grandma is 98 and has trouble walking alone and needs to use adult diapers, and everyone in the family says she cannot move. The problem is that my inlaws (mid 70s and retired) want badly to move over to where we and their other kids all live (they are in the midwest, all of us live in a west coast city), but because grandma lives with them and because of her elderly condition, they are basically staying put and waiting for her to die. She has no medical condition, just normal old age. She doesn’t take any medication for anything! I feel like they should all move out together but all of the siblings think there’s no way a 98 year old can get on an airplane. They act like I’m trying to get her to client Mt. Everest or something. Am I crazy or are they?
Cb
What? That’s crazy. My family did something similar with my great grandma and she lived until 110! They could have fifteen good years with her being close to her family. Pay for a first class ticket and do it.
Anonymous
If I read your post correctly, the siblings are saying the parents cannot sell their house and move because grandma is too old to fly. HUH? If the issue is really how to get grandma from the midwest to the west coast, that is so easy to solve. If for some reason her doctor wouldn’t clear her to fly, they can drive. They can even stop every half hour if they want, and if she can’t sit long. They could even rent an RV!
Anonymous
If you’ve never traveled with somebody who is disabled – and somebody who can’t walk alone certainly qualifies – then yes you might be underestimating the work involved. This is really their call since they are the ones caring for her.
Anonymous
How about a fun road trip? I drove across the country leisurely in 6 days.
Professional Guardian
This is certainly possible and does happen all the time. With incontinence issues, it is trickier, but the more likely concern is increased stroke risk, medication timing management, stress, etc. Get flight cleared by her PCP and discuss whether paying a medical assistant would be needed. Sometimes RN if higher level medical need but more likely a LNA. We have some clients that prefer layovers with breaks or a longer “one and done” flight.
Being with family is so so so important at this stage of life. However, grandma has to have a say and her opinion should be at the center of the conversation instead of age and flying. It sounds like what we call a dignity of risk situation, meaning if grandma wants to risk medical concerns and discomfort of a flight because she clearly wants her life to be filled with her family, then she deserves the dignity of taking that risk. Compare this with if grandma was in end stage dementia and unable to articulate a benefit or recognition of being near family, then the risk would not likely be worth it. At the center should be what grandma wants.
Anonymous
Perhaps they are using the hassle of getting grandma on the plane as an easy excuse because they don’t actually want to face the hassle of moving themselves? A plane ride is one day. Maybe one really challenging day, but not a rational reason to keep living in a place where you don’t want to live.
Anonymous
It’s not just a plane ride, though. A move like this means all new doctors. It means all new stores. A place of worship/community. A new address to remember. A climate change. Even if grandma doesn’t do those things alone, unless she is bedridden and basically in in-home nursing care, these are big changes. For a long time I worked with the elderly population as a neuropsychologist. There is a marked uptick in memory issues after a life change like this.
For someone who wants to make it happen, it is of course possible. But it could be something as basic as “I want to die here and be buried here.” I agree with the above that what grandma wants should be prioritized.
FWIW my GMIL moved from the boonies to the city in which her only daughter lives at age 82. She cried for days because she realized it wasn’t that bad and she should have done it 15 years earlier after her husband died. On the other hand, my perfectly spry 60 year old mother will move states (in New England- like an hour and a half away) because she has never lived anywhere else. Instead, she complains that all her grandkids are too far away.
Senior Attorney
HAHAHAHA!! I’m dying!
I turned 60 this year and OMG “spry!!”
Anononymous
I’m not sure why an elderly, disabled, incontinent person could drive for several days but not fly for a couple of hours. That’s counter-intuitive to me. It’s going to be a pretty unpleasant trip no matter how you do it, better to get it over with faster. FWIW, my grandmother flew in her 90s when she was frail physically and had fairly advanced dementia (including incontinence). My mom flew out to her and accompanied her on the return trip, which I think was necessary but wasn’t that big a deal – just the cost of my mom’s plane ticket and a couple days off work.
Senior Attorney
I’m late to the party but I agree with this.
My mom is about to turn 95 and is disabled and incontinent. I can’t imagine, in my wildest nightmares, taking her on a road trip. I can barely imagine taking her on a plane flight but that would be pretty bad, too. Definitely would have to be first class. But certainly worth it, once, to accommodate a move to a better situation for everybody at the other end.
EM84
I am organizing a low key dinner at my place for my team just before we all leave for holidays. I will be hosting approx 20 people (I don’t even know how they convinced me to do this), it will be low-key as there is no way I could fit that many people at one table. I planned to serve food buffet-style and have people lounge across the apartment (I have a spacious open-plan kitchen & living room). Do you have any go-to dishes you would recommend to serve? I will have one special local dish, but then I would like to serve lots of salads and a few other dishes, some people will also bring a few special dishes as well. Thanks!
Good cook....
I always make a baked chicken rigatoni dish to serve or take to parties at this time of year and I get tons of compliments. Feeds a crowd and reheats well if you want to make it in advance…it requires some cooking and assembly but let me know if you want and I’ll send you the recipe
Anon
Chicken Marbella. It’s recommended on here a lot. A classic recipe everyone loves. You can google it.
London Recs
Going to London for work next week and will have a fair amount of downtime. What are the best things to do?! I’ve been before, so have done all the top touristy things, but am looking to take advantage of some more holiday focused limited-opportunity things.
Ness
A couple of Xmas things: Winter wonderland (I hate it but people love it) and ice-skating in Sommerset house (I love it).
Regarding other no seasonal things that maybe you have not done before: https://skygarden.london/sky-garden (the view is amazing and the place lovely)
SD matrimonial lawyer?
This may be too late for anyone to see, but: any recommendations for a matrimonial lawyer in the San Diego area?
Lily
Please help!
Want to fly to NYC (from SF) with my two teen boys to hang out for like 4 nights after Christmas before they go back to school.
Recommendation on where to stay that is central, near good food and has a fun ‘vibe’?
any recommendation for a day trip from NYC that also has good food or is historical?
Ingar
At a auction i bougth a wonderfull gold necklace to celebrate a professionel milestone. I am so exited. The milestone was Some time ago but I have waiting for Something I really wanted