Previously, on Corporette…

Comments

1. Lynnette

   02/08/2018 at 12:51 pm

   I walked in on my husband yesterday when he was going at it with my au pair. I ran out of the house horrified, and stayed over with a girlfriend.

   How do I deal with this??. My husband has been calling, but I refuse to answer. We have a 2 year old, so leaving will be difficult without a cash infusion which I don’t have. Help!

   • Susan Erickson

     02/08/2018 at 2:40 pm

     After you call a lawyer, call your therapist, mom, best girlfriend, minister, or similar. Yon need someone to talk to, and someone who can comfort you. The au-pair gets fired asap–no questions on that one, and you figure that out.

     Don’t talk to your husband until you are ready–get a grip, fire the au pair, have an appointment with a lawyer, and have your support person in place.

     Some will say this is a must-divorce situation, and you will have to listen to yourself. If/when you move back in–and as you have a two year old, you probably will–keep your bedroom to yourself and have him move into another space.

     If you found your au pair through an agency, let them know as they may find a replacement for you quickly.

     I am so sorry this happened to you–so humiliating, horrifying, and enraging.

     • Anonymous

       02/08/2018 at 4:05 pm

       Uh, An agency should not place another au pair in this situation. Maybe find a day care?

   • Anon

     02/08/2018 at 2:43 pm

     I’m so sorry you are dealing with this. I don’t have much advice but I can anecdotally say my mother took my dad back after he cheated on her. I could see how much it changed her and messed with her self-esteem. I hated my dad for years for breaking up my family but even more so for what he did to my mother. Over the years, my relationship with my dad has improved and I am almost back to the pre-cheating relationship.

     I practice family law and studies show that having both parents in a child’s life has a major positive impact on the child. It is hard to hear right now but even though he is a bad husband, he is not necessarily a bad father. To the extent possible, keep your toxic feelings about him to yourself and don’t let your child feel them.

     Sending lots of strength your way.

     Ps. If you post in the next post you may get a lot more responses

     • Anon

       02/08/2018 at 2:49 pm

       Also – my mother seems to be mostly back to herself and no one other than our nuclear family would even know what happened.

       And I did not mean to imply you stick around for the sake of your child. Just that whatever you choose to do, to the extent possible, foster your child’s relationship with his/her father.

2. latl

   02/08/2018 at 1:44 pm

   To those that like to shop for others:
   I am on the hunt for a grey MENS cardigan, I am thinking not buttons (or big buttons)-more casual, soft, cashmere like material. Size L and a lower-ish price point (max. $50ish). Thank you!

   • Anonymous

     02/08/2018 at 5:26 pm

     Try Uniqlo. https://www.uniqlo.com/us/en/men-extra-fine-merino-v-neck-cardigan-173213.html?dwvar_173213_color=COL09

3. In-House in Houston

   02/08/2018 at 2:08 pm

   Go see an attorney NOW, TODAY, not tomorrow. They will help you plan, whether you decide to stay or leave.